How to Be Happy Now: Stop Chasing Elusive “There”

I’m guilty of thinking, “When I do X, then I’ll feel happy.” This week, I gave a one-hour seminar on nutrition for hikers and trekkers, a process that began in August and spanned three months. I thought I would be thrilled to talk to a large group of people and elated to develop a new course. And I was. But a day later, I caught myself wondering “What’s next?” Chasing future achievements often means we miss the delightful present, which is all we have. So how do we shift from chasing the future “there” to being happy now?

On November 9 I helped with a WTA Trail maintenance work party at Kasch Park in Everett. I left muddier than I can ever remember. I also met some super people. That day, working hard, and trying to stay warm, I was truly happy and not worried about anything in the future.

Why “There” Can’t Make Us Happy

Think of something you’re pursuing. It might be a new job, a bigger house, a fitter body, or an adventure you’re training for. We probably all have some future milestones we’re shooting for, some “there” that matters to us. I have another coming up on Saturday: a hike with a dozen Mountaineers members that will result in being added to the official hike leader list once I complete it.

Yet I know that as soon as I finish it, a new “there” will emerge. Probably along the lines of “How many hikes can I lead in 2025 to earn a Superleader badge?”Achievement of goals is fleeting. They don’t last. Or if they do, we may find ourselves extending the finish line. “Once I lead x hikes, then I’ll be happy.” Wait. If happiness doesn’t exist in the future, how do we find it now?

Rays of sun peek through the trees, turning yellow leaves to gold during a recent walk with Ajax to Hamlin Park. As my stress levels dropped I recalled being happy now.

In Search of Happiness Now

The trick is to find a way to tap into mindfulness and awareness of where happiness falls in the moment. During a recent WTA work party on the Licorice Fern trail on Cougar Mountain, I was excited to learn how a new trail is created. After spending a few hours expanding and leveling an existing trail (aka, lots of digging and root chopping), I meandered over to where a few orange hats (crew leaders) were creating a bypass. I got curious and asked questions.

When the King County trails worker went through the woods with a chainsaw, I followed safely behind and removed the downed branches, stumps, and logs she sliced through. I caught myself humming. During that moment, helping create something future hikers would enjoy, I was happy.

Creating a brand-new trail is hard, satisfying work. The bypass we built followed the pink flags to the left. I helped clear the path for diggers to prepare the soil.

Another example was enjoying a 5-mile urban walk with my dog Tuesday morning before a bomb cyclone hit the region. We meandered along trails in Hamlin Park. It was my celebration outing for completing my talk the night before.

Once we turned off the city street and ventured onto the dirt trail, I felt my blood pressure drop. Stress ebbed away. My shoulders relaxed. I could hear the birds, smell the dirt, and feel the sun’s rays warming my back. If you know anything about me through 3.5 years of blogging, I celebrate all of my major accomplishments with a visit to nature. It is truly my happy place, whether I’m hiking in the mountains, walking with my dog, or building new trails.

Your Turn

Since we are a week away from Thanksgiving, a national US holiday involving gratitude, I thought I would provide a week’s worth of action tips to explore. As you practice each, take note of what makes you smile. What brings you delight? What do you notice about your physical body and mental outlook as you practice them?

Finding this patch of "red snow" in Hamlin Park made me smile. I knew I had a great photo op with Ajax. — Finding this patch of “red snow” in Hamlin Park made me smile. I knew I had a great photo op with Ajax.

Pause to notice small joys: Feel the sun. Give a kind word. Enjoy a moment of stillness.
Engage with your surroundings: Immerse yourself in tasks or nature. Go on a color walk. Take a picture of your favorite shape or color and share it with someone. Listen to the birds.
Reflect on daily wins: write down or mentally acknowledge what went well today. Anticipate what might go well tomorrow.

Our task at Kasch Park was to decommission a trail so that the wetlands could recover. Moving logs that took four people required teamwork and common purpose. — Our task at Kasch Park was to decommission a trail so that the wetlands could recover. Moving logs that took four people required teamwork and a common purpose.

More Joy Tips

Practice gratitude: Reflect on one thing you’re grateful for today. Running water. Restored power. A pretty floral design in your neighbor’s yard.
Move your body: Engage in a physical activity you enjoy, whether it’s a walk, yoga, stretching, or dancing. Movement helps release tension and grounds you in the present moment.
Focus on your five senses: Experience your environment, not only what you see but the textures you touch and the temperatures you sense, the sounds you hear, the scents around you, and the flavors of a meal. This sensory awareness brings you into the present moment.
And finally, do for others: Perform a small act of kindness, like sending a letter, calling a friend, or picking up something someone dropped. Helping others can boost your sense of connection and purpose.

Reframe “Goal Seeking” as “Connection Opportunities”

One way to reframe our “there” goals is to seek opportunities for connection, something I plan to focus on for 2025. In 2024 I changed my thinking about a “marketing plan” to a “connections plan.” Connections opportunities included becoming a national board-certified health and wellness coach, doing trail work with WTA, becoming a hike leader for the Mountaineers, creating new materials I could deliver in talks, and diving into the Zhealth curriculum in neuroscience. All of them involve becoming better equipped to help people or giving back to the community in some way. The trick is to remember to keep connections as the focus.

Hugging trees makes me happy. Fresh air, good company, exploration of somewhere new... what's not to be happy about? — Hugging trees makes me happy. Fresh air, good company, exploration of somewhere new… what’s not to be happy about?

After completing my presentation, I asked for feedback about where I might improve for next time. At work parties, I learned first-hand how trails are built by helping those with more experience. By using neuroscience-based exercises in my training sessions, not only am I teaching people about what works best for their bodies but I’m also learning how to improve workouts. When I lead hikers to Otter and Big Creek Falls on Saturday, I’ll demonstrate how to stay safe in the mountains, no matter what the outcome is. Such moments of connection are happiness in action.

Choose Happiness Today

How can we remind ourselves that there is no “There”? Happiness is here, in the daily journey, not the destination. We can look for joy in small moments and train our skills to identify happiness the moment it happens. If we reframe goals as part of the process, and not the sole purpose, we can remove the pressure to succeed and find success along the way. And by focusing on connection with others, with nature, and with ourselves, we can shift that “there” focus to appreciating what is here and now.

Connections between friends on a rainy, wet trip to Big Creek Falls.

We don’t have to wait for happiness. It’s already all around us, waiting for us to notice. What happiness have you noticed in small moments? Share it in the comments so we can all benefit from our collective experience.