CourtSchurmanGO.com 2025-06-20

How to Learn from Alpine Autumn Changes

Since returning from Alaska, I’ve been eager to visit the Alpine Lakes region to see how autumn is progressing. Last week I learned that the trail to Snow and Gem Lakes has been repaired and reopened. So a friend and I decided to explore. I needed to process my daughter starting college (Convocation is today!) and hoped Mother Nature could provide solace from the tears. She provided the perfect metaphor for me to learn from alpine autumn changes. The lovely weather, beautiful fall colors, hidden blueberries, daunting challenge of a talus slope, and barefoot dip in Gem Lake paralleled my daughter’s own adventures at the University of Washington.

Ajax, T, and I enjoyed the overcast approach to Snow and Gem Lakes.

Perfect Conditions

At just after 8 a.m. on 9/23/22, the three of us headed up the trail. The forecast was for overcast skies, high 50’s, and a light breeze. Perfect hiking weather. Between conversations, my thoughts wandered to my daughter and what she might be doing on campus the weekend before her first quarter of college classes.

Fortunately, Mother Nature grounded me in the present moment. As soon as I spotted the first maples and Sitka mountain ashes in brilliant red and orange, I could only whip out my camera and search for more. Mission accomplished: beautiful colors. Absolutely breathtaking.

A brilliant maple, evidence of alpine autumn changes. Maples are common in Western MA, where I fell in love with their beauty in college. Our daughter visited Seattle's U. WA campus in May when the cherry blossoms were in full bloom. — A brilliant maple, evidence of alpine autumn changes. Maples are common in Western MA, where I fell in love with their beauty in college. Our daughter visited Seattle’s U. WA campus in May when the cherry blossoms were in full bloom.

As we returned to the cars hours later, the sun came out. It gently reminded me that my daughter will struggle and succeed. She will face stormy and sunny days, ups and downs. The only constant we face is change. Change in her living situation and growing independence. For me, coming to terms with the fact that she no longer needs me in the same way.

Our new role as parents of a college student is to support her, be a sounding board when she has questions, and let her assume an active role in navigating her college landscape. May there be as much beauty and a comparable road map for her journey as we had going to Snow and Gem Lakes.

A tarn (foreground) with the larger Snow Lake behind it, on our way back from Gem Lake.

Alpine Autumn Changes: Hidden Blueberries

We paused for a short rest stop at Snow Lake before continuing toward Gem Lake. I discovered we were in prime blueberry terrain. Score! I picked a few small ripe ones and was instantly rewarded with purple smudges on my fingers and a delicious burst of refreshing sweetness on my tongue.

A ripe wild blueberry dangles below reddening leaves, waiting to be picked.

The berries reminded me of a huckleberry hike to Mt. Catherine we did together as a family in 2021. The fruits were like hidden gems, shielded by the changing leaves. Similarly, I’m sure my daughter will find hidden gems at school if she stays on the lookout for them.

The week before University of Washington classes start, the college offers dozens of daily Dawg Daze activities. Sporting events, visits to the Zoo, and impromptu art gatherings. Foot races, movies, and pre-football game face painting.

Like me, my daughter is not much of a joiner, but I truly hope she finds a few tiny gems, moments with a friend here or sunrise there, a class she falls in love with, or a special location she visits repeatedly like Drumheller Fountain.

Uphill Climb of a Talus Slope

Just when I was convinced that “a little farther” would soon become “we’re here,” we faced the most intimidating part of the 11.3-mile hike. Our obstacle? A talus slope that seemed to swallow up the boot path. Momentarily discouraged, I waited for T. to catch up so she could have the final say.

The more we studied the slope, the more we realized that the path through the rocks was fairly level and crested not too far away. We decided we were so close, we might as well finish it up. And what a great decision it was. Other than the two gentlemen right behind us, we had the lake to ourselves and great views in every direction.

The final talus slope just about turned us around. Until we examined where the path went and decided it didn't look too bad. May my daughter, as a new university student, find her roadmap through the next four years and be as filled with excitement about the prospects as I was on reaching this slope. — The final talus slope just about turned us around. Until we examined where the path went and decided it didn’t look too bad. May my daughter, as a new university student, find her roadmap through the next four years and be as filled with excitement about the prospects as I was on reaching this slope.

The takeaway lesson for my daughter is to encourage her to persevere, even when the path is not apparent. To ask questions of those around you who might help. Collaborate. Gather more information. Then proceed, knowing you can always pause, turn around, or try something else.

Alpine Autumn Changes: Cold Dip in Gem Lake

The final lesson involves nurturing. I’ve developed a new hiking ritual this year. If my destination includes a lake, I take off my boots once I get there, so I can dunk my feet. Since we were visiting two lakes, I waited until we got to Gem, a lake I’ve never visited before. T took a pass, but Ajax joined me. It even looked like he wanted to go swimming.

The only constant in my life today is my faithful hiking companion, Ajax. How much longer will a 7-year-old dog be able to hike 12-15 miles? That, too, will eventually change.

Once again, I thought about my daughter and how she’s taking the plunge into a mighty big lake. The University of Washington admitted 7,000 first-year students this fall, 3.5 times more people than the whole of my own undergraduate experience. Talk about overwhelming! But if we can nurture her own process of finding courage, and support her to take tiny steps — maybe not her whole body at first, just her toes — she can gradually build her confidence that she can swim without sinking.

Final Words

Hokey though it may be, turning my hike experience into a life metaphor helped me feel better. It reminded me that change is a constant we can neither control nor prevent. What we CAN control is our mindset and attitude. The more I experience nature to stay grounded, centered, and connected to what matters most to me, the more gracefully I’ll handle this transition to an “empty nest.”

A final look at Snow Lake before we crested the pass and headed back to the car. Sometimes the path is more easily identified by looking backward than forward. May my daughter find a map forward to make looking back more fun.

Can lessons from nature help YOU make some big changes this fall? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.

Something for Everyone in Denali National Park

Recent blog posts focused on how to plan a multi-faceted family vacation and embark on an adventure into mindfulness while looking for wildlife in Denali National Park. Whether you are a thrill-seeker, a dog lover, an off-trail scrambler, or a scenery lover, the park has something for everyone. Read about whitewater rafting. Visit the only canine ranger kennel in the national parks system. Take a short scramble at Savage River. Fall in love with the park like we did.

Our daughter mimics a caribou in front of the Denali National Park and Preserve entry sign.

For the Thrill-Seeker: Whitewater Rafting

I asked my husband and daughter whether they wanted to try whitewater rafting. My daughter has done a few rafting trips with the Seattle Mountaineers. But it has been years since my husband and I have. They both suggested that we try the Canyon Whitewater Run.

Denali Raft Adventures outfitted us in dry suits and paddles. We spent two hours paddling on the Nenana River, just outside Denali National Park. Luc, our guide, joked that we had to test out the new dry suits. I chose to be brave and slipped into the river at his signal. Their dry suit kept me both warm and dry, clear up to my neck. Getting back in the boat, however, proved challenging. Fortunately, my husband is strong and in two tries, managed to pull me back in. If you have thrill-seeking teens, we recommend going rafting.

The Denali area has something for everyone. For the thrill-seeker in us, we chose to go whitewater rafting.

Something for Everyone: Canine Rangers

Another great family activity was visiting the park’s huskies. Denali NP is the only U.S. national park with canine rangers. The park limits motorized vehicles in winter, but rangers still have work to do. Huskies to the rescue! We got to visit their 31 adult dogs (and 3 puppies) who work as sled dogs in the winter and enjoy rest during the summer.

Canine rangers stand at attention, ready to work at the signal.

As part of their free 4 p.m. “sled dog tour,” we watched the 3 puppies “race” back to their kennels. They also have a sled demonstration during earlier tours. The tour is a perfect activity for people of all ages and abilities.

Meet the 2022 Canine Rangers, huskies who reside in Denali National Park. — Meet the 2022 Canine Rangers, the huskies who reside in Denali National Park.

For the Scrambler: Savage River

If you have kids who like getting vertical, then they’ll enjoy Savage River (Milepost 15). The park runs a free Savage River shuttle to help reduce car traffic. Lots of people also explore the braided river beds and hike on established trails.

Our daughter will hike with us if she has a friend along, a geocache to find, or berries to pick. Walking along a road looking for animals and birds? She’ll do it in moderation. When I asked if she wanted to scramble up some rocks, she agreed. While it may not be the miles and gain I enjoy with my dog Ajax, I was eager to explore anywhere, especially with company.

The short scramble took no more than thirty minutes round trip, but it provided a welcome interlude following the morning shuttle ride and afternoon search for animals. We were fortunate to have overcast skies but no rain for the first four days of our trip. We took some cool panorama shots to conclude our last afternoon in Denali National Park.

The author's husband and teenage daughter pose for a picture on the "summit" of a Savage River scramble overlooking the parking lot. — The author’s husband and teenage daughter pose for a picture on the “summit” of a Savage River scramble overlooking the parking lot.

Something for Everyone: Especially Scenery Lovers

Finally, if you want to see amazing scenery, Denali National Park is unparalleled in its beauty. Especially if you are lucky enough to visit at the tail end of the season when the alpine tundra turns vibrant colors. Every turn we took, we saw more mountains, more distant snowfields, and more profiles of animals on the ridgeline.

The braided river bed (and bridge) at Savage River, Milepost 15, in Denali National Park from our "scramble" overlook. — The braided river bed (and bridge) at Savage River, Milepost 15, in Denali National Park from our scramble overlook.

Each of our park adventures reminded me of elements I’ve enjoyed at home. Climbing is definitely for both the thrill-seeker and the scrambler. I don’t know what I’d do without dogs in my life; seeing the huskies made me miss and appreciate my hiking companion back home. And I continue to enjoy hiking and exploring the beauty of trails in the state of Washington.

Do your vacations reflect activities you love back home? Or do you try to explore things you’ve never done before? Please share any reflections or comments below. I always love to hear from readers.

Mindful in Denali While Searching for the Big Five

Continuing from last week, this post is the second in a series about my family’s recent 12-day Alaskan vacation. Included are several exercises to increase mindful awareness. I’ve blended them with musings about my journey to remain mindful in Denali while searching for grizzly bears, moose, caribou, Dall sheep, and wolves.

Female moose foraging for food in Denali National Park.

Mindfulness Versus Meditation

This week several clients asked me to differentiate between “mindfulness” and “meditation.” I am not formally trained to teach either. But my understanding is that meditation is a process of clearing the mind by focusing on your breath while letting troublesome thoughts float by. Yoga is a popular example of meditation.

Mindfulness, on the other hand, is the practice of staying in the present. It involves paying attention to now, rather than worrying about the future or fretting about the past. I have had far more “success” with mindfulness than with meditation. Perhaps because I can practice mindfulness while brushing my teeth, walking Ajax, washing dishes, or taking photographs.

Grizzly bear foraging for berries and tubers beside a stream wash.

When Mindfulness Doesn’t Work

I found myself reflecting on my mental state during our recent Alaska trip. One of our favorite activities on family vacations is to photograph wildlife, whether we are on a boat, looking for birds, or driving park roads. Denali National Park is known for five large mammals, fondly referred to as the big five. We located all but wolves.

Admittedly, there were times I caught myself not being mindful. Was my daughter enjoying her graduation trip? Should I have used a different camera carrier than the one draped awkwardly across my body? Would one can of bear spray be enough if we had another unexpected encounter with a grizzly? My standing joke is, “I worry so bad things won’t happen.” How much better would my experiences be if I ditch worry and focus on NOW?

This male caribou seemed as fascinated by us as we were with him. I remain stunned by the gorgeous autumn colors we were fortunate to see.

Try This #1

Provided are a few thought exercises to help you explore mindfulness. Try recording the answers to the following questions to tune in to what you are doing RIGHT NOW:

How are you feeling? Where do you feel it?
What do you need? A drink of water, a nap, a bite of chocolate, a walk? Can you give it to yourself?
If you could have anything, what would you love today? A massage, a million-dollar bonus, a new boss? The sky is the limit.
What are you most proud of from today, this week, and this month? Consider reviewing my post on gratitude.

While exploring sounds in Denali as we walked the road near MP 43, we kept hearing odd squeaks reminding me of pikas and marmots. We finally located the source, a family of cute Arctic ground squirrels.

Mindful in Denali: Logistics of Animal Searches

To look for wildlife in Denali, we first needed to understand where we were allowed to go to look for animals. Denali National Park limits car traffic on the paved road to Savage River (MP 15). Beyond that, a narrated bus or a shuttle bus from the bus depot near the park entrance at MP .5 was the only motorized option. We could also bike or walk. In late summer 2022, Denali’s single road was only open as far as milepost 43, due to the Pretty Rocks landslide. We chose the shuttle bus.

We have seen moose on trips to the Tetons, Glacier, and Yellowstone National Parks, but we'd heard they're much more prevalent in Alaska, even in Anchorage. We spotted four on our jaunt north toward Denali National Park. — Moose are also visible in the Tetons, Glacier, and Yellowstone National Parks, but we’d heard they’re much more prevalent in Alaska, even in Anchorage. We spotted four on our jaunt north toward Denali National Park.

The mammals we were looking for forage during the morning and evening hours. Our primary access limitations were our teen daughter’s sleeping needs and available seats in the shuttle buses. The two days we took the bus, we reached our exploration areas around noon. Fortunately, plenty of animals graze all day long.

We knew from six visits to Yellowstone National Park that we’d each need a good pair of binoculars, especially to spot wolves and Dall sheep. My husband and I had our digital cameras ready, as our cell phones don’t take good wildlife close-ups.

Our shuttle bus driver pointed out tips about local landmarks as he drove, including slowing down for photographs of wildlife near — or in — the road. All the photos included in this post were taken using a 100-400 mm lens so we would not interrupt their natural behavior.

This male caribou wandered across the road without much concern about the tin boxes traveling around him.

Try This: #2

If you have 15-20 minutes available, go for a sensory walk someplace you don’t normally visit. Do NOT listen to music or record steps on a biometric device. Take yourself off autopilot and sink into the moment. A watch is okay if you need to be back at a certain time.

What do you see?
Can you identify any new scents? What do you smell? Are they pleasant or not?
Listen to as many things as you can hear. Can you find ten distinct sounds? Learning birdsong is a great way to activate your hearing.

Pay attention to the breeze, textures, sense of heat or cold, and sun on your face. What do you feel?
Do you “taste” anything around you? Berries, the aroma of coffee, or the ‘taste’ of wildfire smoke?
Finally, do you feel safe? Harried? Nervous? Relaxed? What contributes to your overall interpretation of sensory input?

Unexpected Delights from Being Mindful in Denali

What we missed by arriving at the start of Alaska’s rainy season, we more than made up for by hitting the jaw-dropping autumn colors perfectly. If I’d been too focused on finding the animals, I might not have fully appreciated the beauty surrounding us. What’s more, we learned more about animal behavior by being fully open to the experience.

The driver told us that bull moose were congregating for their annual rut. We could also see various stages of velvet on the caribou’s antlers. By doing plenty of research ahead of time, we knew what to expect and where we might find birds and mammals. Consider creating a “perhaps list” so that you have plenty of options to choose from. And reflect on the type of animal behavior you are interested in seeing so that you can time your trip based on what you’re likely to see.

Dall sheep high up in an alpine tundra meadow. We spotted a dozen as we walked east from Icicle Canyon. — Dall sheep high up in an alpine tundra meadow. We spotted a dozen as we walked east from Igloo Creek Campground at MP 33.6.

Try This: #3

As you go about your daily business, pause every so often and look around you. Notice how the light hits the clock. Watch dust motes float in the sun. Observe how your hands play in the suds while doing dishes. The more we can bring awareness and attention to what we are doing, the more we will be able to appreciate the present moment. We live NOW, not tomorrow or yesterday.

While shooting photos of wildlife, I am fully focused on the present moment: what I can see, hear, and feel. I was mindful in Denali when we spotted this foraging grizzly bear.

As always, if you have experiences you’d like to share related to mindfulness or novelty, please feel free to share them in the comments so that we can all learn, grow, and discuss.

How to Plan a Great Alaska Vacation

My teenage daughter, husband, and I just spent twelve wonderful days exploring south-central Alaska. A friend asked, how did you plan such a great Alaska vacation? I glibly replied that it took months. Realizing that I didn’t really answer her question, I thought it might make a fun blog topic to kick off a series of posts featuring Alaska musings and photos.

Planning a vacation is much like pursuing any important goal, whether you want to write a novel, change jobs, climb a mountain, or start a new hobby.

A grizzly bear forages near the road in Denali National Park. I couldn't get enough of the mammals and gorgeous fall colors. — A grizzly bear forages near the road in Denali National Park. I couldn’t get enough of the mammals and gorgeous fall colors.

Start By Knowing Your Parameters

The first step in planning anything is to consider all your parameters. In June when we asked our daughter where she’d like to go for her graduation present, she mentioned Alaska. We got to work researching possibilities. When we knew our budget, roughly what we wanted to see and do, and how long we could travel, we tried to figure out when we could take two weeks of vacation.

Our best look at Denali on day 4 as we left the area. My highest priority was spending time viewing wildlife in Denali National Park, while hopefully getting a glimpse of North America's highest mountain. — Our best look at Denali on day 4 as we left the area. My highest priority was spending time viewing wildlife in Denali National Park, while hopefully getting a glimpse of North America’s highest mountain.

Time — Duration, Time of Year

Time turned out to be a crucial consideration. Our daughter starts college in mid-September, so we originally considered going right after Labor Day. Such a late trip could mean shoulder-season prices and fewer tourists. But that far north, many of the activities we wanted to do (i.e. white water rafting, glacier cruising, visiting Denali National Park, and seeing wildlife) would already be ending for the season. We settled on August 24-September 3.

We were lucky enough to see the Northern Lights on our last evening in Anchorage (9/3/22). I'd written it off early in the planning as I thought the longer daylight would make it impossible to see unless we were up very late at night. — We were lucky enough to see the Northern Lights on our last evening in Anchorage (9/3/22). I’d written it off early in the planning as I thought the longer daylight would make it impossible to see unless we were up very late at night.

Location — Regions, Cities, National Parks

I love to photograph wildlife, especially bears in their natural habitat. We learned that the best photo opportunities with grizzly bears would be at Brooks Falls in July when the salmon return to spawn. Missed it. We decided not to drive all the way to Homer, which is the closest place to catch a plane to visit the Brooks Falls bears (click the link to see live bear cam action!). Homer is also popular for fishing; since we don’t fish, eliminating it resulted in a driving corridor between Denali and Kenai Fjords National Parks, roughly six hours apart with Anchorage falling between.

We bought tickets for flights between Anchorage and SeaTac and finalized our itinerary:

4 nights in Cantwell in an air B&B RV, 20 miles south of Denali National Park
3 nights in Seward in a small cabin air B&B, 6 miles north of the small boat harbor and close to a fish weir
4 nights in Anchorage in the bottom half of a house, centrally located a few miles south of the airport

The foliage in Denali National Park was just changing colors. Late August is already fall in central to north Alaska while our home city of Seattle remained deep in summer. — The foliage in Denali National Park was just changing colors. Autumn reaches central Alaska in late August, whereas Seattle remains summer-like until mid-September.

Transportation and Lodging

We reserved a rental car from Enterprise; we chose a small car for three and our luggage, without extras. But we understand it’s not necessary to drive in Alaska like it is the lower 48. Taking the train is a fun option, and boats and seaplanes go everywhere. Because we value our independence and steer clear of large organized groups, it made the most sense for us.

As for lodging, we enjoy staying at air B&Bs, to see how people in the region live. Our RV was definitely the coldest, most remote, and most cramped stay, but we also got the best night’s sleep there. And the hospitality our Anchorage host gave us — danishes for breakfast, homegrown flowers on the stairs, and conversation around his fire pit the last night — was unprecedented.

This lovely display of homemade dahlias was arranged by our Anchorage host, Javier.

Add Activities — Rafting, Panning for Gold, and More

The final stage of planning included what we would do each day. This task usually falls to me. The week before our trip, I ran into some glitches with my computer and lost hours’ worth of research and planning. Twice. By the time I had our final itinerary ready the day before we departed, I knew exactly what we were going to do.

Our family adventures included:

Visiting Denali National Park
Meeting Working Huskies in DNP
Wildlife photography and hiking from DNP shuttles
White water rafting in Denali

The well-trained, oh-so-attentive Denali sled dogs and their kennels went on high alert just before their show.

Birding and photography throughout the trip
Tracking license plates — forty states and five Canadian provinces were represented!
Taking a birthday cruise to Northwestern Glacier in Kenai Fjords National Park out of Seward

The author with her tall college-bound daughter in front of Northwest Glacier. Not sure what she was standing on... — The author with her tall college-bound daughter in front of Northwest Glacier. Not sure what she was standing on…

Visiting the Alaska Sealife Center in Seward on a rainy day
Panning for gold
Exploring Alaska State Fair in Palmer and a 2100-pound pumpkin

Seeing the Musk Ox Farm in Palmer, the only one in the world
Learning at the Alaska Native Heritage Center in Anchorage
Discovering art in the Alaska Museum in Anchorage
Catching the northern lights on our last night

Enjoy Your Great Alaska Vacation

After all of that planning, what remained was to go and enjoy ourselves. Except we forgot one major thing: Alaska does not recognize T-mobile, our cell phone provider. As soon as we landed in Anchorage, before our drive north, we had to locate a place that sold SIM cards so we could still place calls to local restaurants and shops. It’s not something we ever thought to check, but next time we travel anywhere, we certainly will!

The other big takeaway is you cannot possibly visit all of Alaska in one trip. Pick a national park or two. Choose a region. Narrow it down to a few favorite activities. Our twelve-day trip was an appetizer. The four adjectives I’ve used the most this week are vast, rugged, varied, and beautiful.

If you are considering a visit to Alaska, plan on staying for a month or two. July is their dry season, while late August is considered the start of autumn. And we never had an issue with mosquitoes!

MOOOOOSE! A great Alaska vacation for me includes Dall sheep, grizzly bears, caribou, and moose. If you also see a wolf you've "hit a grand slam." — MOOOOOSE! A great Alaska vacation for me includes Dall sheep, grizzly bears, caribou, and moose. If you also see a wolf you’ve “hit a grand slam.”

Now the fun starts: processing over 2000 photographs and all we experienced while avoiding anticipointment. In the words of Arnold Schwarzenegger, “I’ll be back.” As you read this blog, if you found yourself particularly interested in a location or activity, please leave a comment so I know to include more about it in upcoming posts.

How to Let Go of the Need to Control

Last week a client asked me which feels more daunting: climbing Mt. Rainier or helping our only child get ready to start college next month. To me, Mt. Rainier feels way easier. Perhaps it has more to do with the fact that I’ve reached the summit eight times. It’s familiar, predictable, and finite. Launching a college student is a once-in-a-lifetime milestone we will never experience again. It’s had its ups and downs over the past eighteen years, and we never found the parenting user’s manual. So many things can — and probably will — still go wrong. As my roles as an author, coach, and parent collide in spinning turmoil, my role is to let go of the need to control.

Once we cleared away enough of the insidious bamboo grass a few weeks ago, this rose bush once again began to thrive. I cannot control its rate of growth but I can certainly improve conditions to give it a better chance.

Who Has a Need to Control?

As I ponder my various roles, I ask myself: which one has a need to control? The answer: all of them. But knowing that, I can work to change it.

Authors

Authors need to design every aspect of their story. In a way, they’re playing God, throwing rocks at their protagonist and giving them increasingly difficult challenges. They may have control over their characters and the worlds they create. But as soon as they look for an editor, agent, and publishing house, everything changes. They have control over one thing: the process of creating. But ultimately, the one in control of reading what’s published is the reader.

Coaches

Coaches try to help their clients by providing detailed workouts, guidance, and moral support. We introduce clients to helpful resources and effective strategies for getting to their goals. But when clients miss a workout, get sick or injured, become overworked, or lose interest, we realize the truth: coaches are not in control; the client is. Coaches only have control over what they bring to the relationship.

Parents

Parents try to ensure that no harm comes to their offspring, sometimes stepping in when they should let their child struggle. I’ve been asking myself, “What challenges will she face? Have we prepared her well enough to handle them? How often will she have to fall flat on her face before she is independent?” (The answer, if I sit still long enough to listen to inner wisdom, is “As often as it takes.”) Our role is changing from provider and protector to collaborator and advisor. We are no longer in control of her choices; she is. And really, hasn’t it been that way for some time now?

An image that helps me release the need to control is letting my tumultuous thoughts flow around me like water, while remaining anchored. — An image that helps me release the need to control is letting my tumultuous thoughts flow around me like water while remaining anchored.

The Illusion of Control

Dr. Seuss said, “Only you can control your future.” By that, I think he meant we are the only ones who can take strides in whatever we feel is the right direction at the time. Others suggest that control is an illusion. And Napoleon Hill is quoted as saying, “You either control your mind or it controls you.” How do we wrap our heads around the fact that so much is out of our control?

By focusing on those few aspects we do — like our thoughts, our behaviors, our actions — and minimizing the impact of those we don’t, such as weather, what others think of us, and other people’s actions.

Whenever I feel the overwhelming need to control some aspect of my writing, my clients’ workouts, or my daughter’s life, I take deep breaths and remind myself that I’m doing the best I can with the tools available to me. And I erase the need to be perfect.

I keep reminding myself of my resolution post on kisage (Keep It Simple And Good Enough) from January. We have done enough, and anywhere we haven’t, she’ll learn more quickly than if we do it for her. I’ve added the catchy phrase, “Let go, let it be good.” (For the second phrase, I’ve replaced the popular “let God” with what works for me.)

A pair of raccoons stares back at me as their two siblings climb down a nearby tree. Our dog tried to give chase but thankfully he must have heard something in my unusual tone of voice that stopped him from getting into a tussle. We cannot control nature, but we can control how we interact with it: with respect for all living things.

Additional Resources

Instead of trying to control everything, I like to remind myself of tips from the following posts on CourtSchurmanGo.com:

Fear is a normal aspect of life, but we don’t need to let it RULE our lives. We can prepare ourselves, our clients, our families, and our colleagues the best we can. A year ago I posted about letting go of my daughter; by being self-compassionate today I can recognize that this process will likely take several more years. We can be curious about what our inner critic teaches us without letting it dominate. And we can stick to our own moral compass, so we can do the very best we can. Then let go, and let it be good.