CourtSchurmanGO.com 2024-11-19

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Expect the Unexpected: How to Embrace the Journey

My most recent hikes to Tiger and Cougar Mountains, and Rainbow, Island, and Olallie Lakes have paralleled my discoveries as I prepare for my July 22 NBHWC Board exam. Each hike has reminded me to embrace the journey, not just the destination, and to expect the unexpected.

Mt. Rainier as seen from the clearing on West Tiger 1 on June 21.

Expect the Unexpected: Bear on High Point Trail

At 8 a.m. on the summer solstice, Ajax, a friend, and I headed up the High Point Trail on Tiger Mountain. I’d never explored this particular trail before and was delighted with the shady meanderings. After about an hour, my friend announced she’d had enough, so Ajax and I escorted her back along the twisting path.

Just minutes below Ruth’s Cove, I saw a huge brown mass in the middle of the trail. Bear! It took one look at us and scampered into the woods, headed uphill. After that, we called “Hey bear!” back to the powerlines a quarter mile from the car, where we parted ways. No matter how many times I hike, I never plan on seeing bears. I’m coming to expect the unexpected.

Our hiking partner at Ruth's Cove on the TMT. Soon after this spot, she felt like she'd had enough so we hiked back partway with her. — Our hiking partner at Ruth’s Cove on the TMT. Soon after this spot, she felt like she’d had enough so we hiked back partway with her.

Bear, Take 2

Undaunted, Ajax and I continued back the way we’d just descended. No, I don’t have a death wish. And no, I don’t hike with bear spray or bear bells, having heard from rangers that bears are more attracted to the tinny inanimate sounds (do they think they’re birds?) than to people’s voices. I made sure I had a trekking pole out to make us look bigger if necessary

I frequently call out, “Hello bear, we mean no harm,” or something similar whenever I anticipate we may have company (Mt. Defiance and Granite Peak come to mind). Black bears are searching for food, after all, and as long as you leave them alone, they’ll leave you alone. Unless a mama has cubs.

Expect the unexpected. A single black bear on W. Tiger 1 just below Ruth's Cove. I didn't linger to get my big lens so the quality is shady/cell through ferns. — Expect the unexpected. A single black bear on W. Tiger 1 just below Ruth’s Cove. I didn’t linger to get my big lens so the quality is shady/cell through ferns.

When we approached Ruth’s Cove, I heard crackling branches. Something big rustled in the woods. This time I expected the unexpected. I started my vocal alerts so he’d know where we were. As we turned a corner, Ajax froze on point.

There in the woods, maybe 30 yards off, sat what I guessed was the same bear, eating. I called “Hey bear, have a nice breakfast,” and snapped a very quick photo before we continued steadily to Ruth’s Cove and beyond. Rule number two with bears, NEVER run. They think you’re prey.

Life Parallel 1

Instead of giving up on the day’s adventure, I used my experience and knowledge about wildlife to continue on the hiking trail I set out to explore. The bear and the new-to-us trail added an unexpected dimension of excitement, exploration, and challenge on an otherwise straightforward trail.

Spot the elephant! I love looking for hidden treasures in the foliage.

Likewise, as I studied for my exam, I discovered additional materials to review. While some might look at the added time and challenge with concern, or “How am I ever going to get through all of this?” the new information has provided rich nuances and subtleties I can use right now in my coaching practice. Win!

One in particular is called the “magic wand” exercise. Recently, a client expressed her wish for a juicy, colorful, crunchy, and delicious salad prepared by a professional chef. I asked her what one step in that direction might be. She decided to try a colorful vegetable or fruit in each salad until she discovered new favorite ingredients to put together for flavor and texture. Finding a treasure — a new tool — in the additional material reminded me again to expect the unexpected.

Expect the Unexpected: Coyote at Big Tree Ridge

The intended route was exploring the northernmost trails in Cougar, from Big Tree (west) to Wilderness (East.) Instead, we explored the west part of the park, north to south and back again.

Five days later, Ajax and I met a pair of friends on Cougar Mountain. We hiked up the Big Tree Ridge trail, spotting a coyote on the way to the Harvey Manning Trailhead, their turnaround point. If you haven’t guessed by now, I adore spotting wildlife.

When my friends returned to their cars for work, Ajax and I continued our exploration. My intention: find the connector trails to Wilderness Peak so we could explore the northern part of the park. I found a traverse map online and thought it was feasible.

There's still water flowing down Coal Creek Falls. But for how long? — There’s still water flowing down Coal Creek Falls. But for how long?

Once we reached Fred’s Railroad Trail, however, a new-to-me waterfall beckoned. We turned right rather than continuing left toward Shy Bear Pass. This allowed us to visit Coal Creek Falls en route to the Red Town Trailhead, which just reopened in June 2024 and which I’d never been to before.

Our ten-mile ramble included 24 bird species and visits to four trailheads. I gained a greater appreciation for the coal mining that occurred years ago within the park. The Cave Holes on the map indicated collapsed mines. Just when I’d forgotten to expect the unexpected, we spotted a deer near Clay Pit Road.

Life Parallel 2

During this second hike, I gained an appreciation for exploring new-to-me trails branching off of familiar trails. This works well on Cougar, Tiger, Si/Little Si, and Squak, areas that all have a vast network of intersecting trails.

The view toward West Tiger 2 and 3 shows the deforestation effects from a few summers ago.

As I plow through my study materials, I appreciate the interweaving of change theories I’m mastering, including the Transtheoretical Model (TTM) of change, Motivational Interviewing, Positive Psychology, and Nonviolent Communication (NVC). The past four months have helped me integrate the material into my coaching toolkit.

Where I am starting to expect the unexpected is to look for parallels and similarities between life and hiking. The mental intersections feel as solid as the labyrinthian trails on Cougar Mountain, with clues as to when and how to explore them depending on the situation.

Mt. Rainier peeks above a sea of clouds filling the valley just below Olallie Lake on the Pratt Lake trail.

Success at Island, Rainbow, Olallie Lakes

On July 2 Ajax and I visited Rainbow, Island, and Olallie Lakes at Exit 47. I wanted to beat the heat anticipated over the long July 4th weekend. Ajax and I hiked above the clouds on a beautiful morning and didn’t see a soul until we were headed down.

Of the three outings featured in this blog, this was the only day that we succeeded in reaching our intended destinations. We’d tried several times before (twice in March, Changing Seasons March 2024, Celebrate Milestones March 2024, and again on May 9) but turned back because of snow. My WTA trip report encapsulates our experience.

Ajax gazes out over Rainbow Lake on July 2. This was one of three lakes we visited on a summer-changing hike.

What’s Up with Ajax?

I never could have expected the unexpected this time. Despite giving Ajax a good 30-minute rest at Island Lake, when I packed up to head back, he refused to follow. My stomach dropped. Did he know something I didn’t? Could I carry him to the car if I had to? When the bugs threatened to eat me alive, I attached his leash and gently guided him out.

At times I grabbed his suitcase harness to support him out of the basin. Would he fit in my pack? How might I create a makeshift sling? Would there be any people who could help me if he refused to continue?

Pristine and frigid Island Lake with snow patches still evident across the lake. We spent 30 minutes here - dunking my feet - but Ajax didn't want to move. Did he know something I didn't? or was he just tired? I couldn't take the bugs. We had to leave. — Pristine and frigid Island Lake with snow patches still evident across the lake. We spent 30 minutes here – dunking my feet – but Ajax didn’t want to move. Did he know something I didn’t? or was he just tired? I couldn’t take the bugs. We had to leave.

Fortunately, as we descended from Pratt-Island junction, he seemed to improve; he even turned toward Olallie Lake to add a few more miles to our hike. Reaching three lakes was the original goal. But now I realize my overarching goal is way more important: having a healthy, unconditionally loving pet for as long as possible. Hikes or not. He comes first.

Life Parallel 3

By the time we got home, Ajax seemed to have trouble with his right front leg. Was it arthritis? Soreness? A thorn? He’s done 10-12 miles with me this year, so I know he’s capable of the mileage. The heat wasn’t an issue; we were in the shade and on the trail early. I made sure to provide plenty of food and water.

I did everything right. So what was he experiencing? Did he just have an off day? Or is this an indication of what’s to come? If I risk taking him with me in the future, what do I do if he refuses to walk out?

The bridge crossing heading into Olallie Lake Basin on our return.

Those thoughts turned to thinking about my upcoming exam. What do I do if I don’t pass? Have I put all my eggs in one proverbial basket, both for our hikes and for my coaching future? It dawned on me that I was asking the wrong questions.

The question I should be asking instead is: How can I expect the unexpected and grow from the side trips?

The Future: Expect the Unexpected

If a pilot is off course a significant percentage of the time but still reaches the destination through course correction, perhaps it’s time to focus on what benefits our detours provide us.

After another 15-minute rest at Olallie Lake, Ajax seemed ready for the final 75 minutes to the car.

For three years, I have written about our many adventures together as I explore change. I rely on Ajax for companionship and humor. There will come a time not too far away when I have to let him go. I’m not ready to face one of the biggest, inevitable, and worst changes of all: the loss of my best canine buddy and hiking partner.

But now is not the time for grief. Now is the time to appreciate the side trips and detours, embrace all the wonderful events of today, and enjoy the parallel journeys of studying and exploring whatever trails we can visit. I’m not giving up — not on the test, not on my hiking partner. He’s proven how resilient he is, and I will prove how resilient I am. No matter what comes next.

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Stage of Change: How to Journey from Resistance to Growth

En route to the NBC-HWC credential exam in July, I continue to hike weekly to provide massive self-care as I digest copious amounts of study material. During the past three weeks, I’ve examined the Transtheoretical Model of Change (TTM) and how it relates to my recent activities. They include hikes to the ridge above Thompson Lake, Annette Lake, Teneriffe Falls, and an archery experience at The Nock Point for Father’s Day. The big takeaway is identifying what stage of change someone is in to help them move from resistance to growth.

My little trooper Ajax, a constant on my hikes to Annette Lake and Thompson Lake Ridge.

Pre-Contemplation Stage of Change: “I can’t/I won’t”

The first stage of change in the Transtheoretical Model (TTM) is Pre-contemplation. In this stage, people may not even be aware they need to change. Often accompanied in this stage of change are the phrases, “I can’t…” or “I won’t…” Someone caught in a toxic job situation, for example, may find real excuses for why they can’t leave it right now, usually involving fear of letting people down or surviving without a paycheck.

Perhaps now is a horrible time to give up alcohol, chocolate, or smoking because of excessive stress. Or it’s way too hard to think about exercising because of the recent losses of friends, a pet, or close family members. The best way to converse with people using “I can’t” or “I won’t” is to provide compassion and support. No amount of cajoling will make them change until they’re ready to use a different language.

Granite Creek Connector to Thompson Lake Ridge

I recently experienced “I can’t” on June 6 when Ajax and explored Granite Creek on the way to Granite Lakes. We came across 36 rivulet crossings, but the only one that turned us around was the raging creek above which proved to be too much for Ajax. Discouraged, I knew we couldn’t reach Granite Lakes safely.

A quarter mile behind us was a junction for Thompson Lake. Knowing nothing about the side trail, but aware that we had an hour until my turn-around time, I turned “We can’t” on its ear with, “Let’s explore another option.” After 40 more minutes, we stopped for a short snack deep in the woods. When I headed back the way we came, Ajax refused to follow, just like he had on our previous trip to McClellan Butte.

Ajax’s Sixth Sense

What did he know that I didn’t? Relenting, we continued for nine more minutes — reaching the ridge between Thompson Lake basin on one side and Granite Lakes on the other. My mood soared. We couldn’t reach a lake that day, but we’d found another way to reach our own “peak” and identify two more hikes for later this summer. I took it as a win, reframing the failure to reach a lake as a successful and fun outing nonetheless.

Beautiful raging Granite Creek provides wonderful background noise for hiking. The only negative is it makes it harder to hear birds.

If you find yourself in the “I can’t” stage, some possible strategies to use to move forward include the following: 1. Reframe your behavior by talking with others about it. 2. Analyze yourself and your actions. 3. Assess any short-term or long-term risks of your current behaviors. Then ask yourself two crazy questions: What’s GOOD about changing, and what’s BAD about staying the same? These answers may help you shift to the second stage of change.

Contemplation Stage: I May

The second stage is Contemplation. In this stage, people weigh the pros and cons of changing and may still find the negatives outweighing the positives. Often accompanying this stage are the phrases, “I may….”, “I might…” or “I could…” Someone thinking about establishing a consistent hiking program, for example, might come up with possibilities such as, “I could start hiking on Tuesdays.” Another person wanting to eat more vegetables might say, “I could add tomatoes or peppers to my omelets, sandwiches, or salads.”

Archery on Father’s Day

On Father’s Day, my husband wanted to go to the archery range. My first instinct was to say “I can’t; I’ve never done it before. But I’ll take pictures.” I remembered my commitment to hunt for BLING — including novelty — and changed my thoughts to, “If I try it, I might enjoy it.” It required shifting to a beginner’s mindset and embracing the possibility that I might feel awkward, nervous, and uncomfortable.

So I stepped outside my comfort zone and, sure enough, I got scolded for picking up my bow while the red light was still on. But instead of feeling bad about myself, I reminded myself, “It’s a safety precaution and you’re a total novice. Let yourself learn. You won’t make the same mistake twice.” By the end of the three hours, we’d moved the targets twice and improved our consistency. I am ready to go back and try again.

I may never be an expert markswoman. But with 3 hours of practice, I've moved from the "I can't" stage of change to "I am." — I may never be an expert markswoman. But with 3 hours of practice, I’ve moved from the “I can’t” stage of change to “I am.”

If you find yourself in the “I may” stage of change, some possible strategies for moving forward include writing down the pros on one side and the cons on the other. See if you can find a way to make the pros outweigh the cons. Identify any barriers to change, and examine whether you have the ability and readiness to change.

Preparation Stage of Change: I Will

In the third stage of change, a person is committed to taking action in the foreseeable future. In this “I will” stage, people often start by “trying on” tiny steps, including writing down goals and collecting information.

When I was trying to establish a more consistent hiking practice in January, I contacted several people to see if they would be interested in joining me on Squak Mountain on Tuesdays. Six months later, people are finally taking me up on the offer. I may have been ready then; they’re ready now. I’ll take it!

The fascinating thing about the TTM is there is no linear progression through change. The hardest part is shifting from pre-contemplation to contemplation. You might be in contemplation for a very long time. Or, overnight, you might have some inspiration — such as a health scare — that rockets you from pre-contemplation into action. It’s also common to be ready, willing, and able to change in one area of your life, but not in another.

Nothing Succeeds Like Success

Now that my college friend and I have had three successful summers of hiking together (see Olallie Lake, Snow Lake, and Annette Lake) we’ve created a streak that will make it easier to continue next summer. Nothing succeeds quite like success. I know we will find a way to make it happen in the future when she’s back in town.

And now that my daughter is home for the summer, we will find mid-week days to hike. My January goal has become a June reality. “I will” has become “I am.”

Beautiful Annette Lake was one of the earlier hikes my daughter and I did last summer. She had no problems with it this year!

If you find yourself in the “I will” stage, write down some goals or intentions, from smallest and easiest to biggest and most meaningful. Consider making a collage or visual depiction that represents what you want. Post motivating statements or reminders to yourself — in the car, on the bathroom window, or even the fridge. Develop an action plan that includes a starting date. Collect information about the benefits of making your change, and share your intention with someone.

Action Stage: I Am

In the action stage of change, you are taking direct actions to accomplish your goals. While I have been in the maintenance phase of physical activity for decades, for creating a consistent hiking habit, I am in the action phase.

To make this phase more enjoyable (and therefore more likely to maintain year-round), I am actively seeking learning opportunities every time I go out. For my new-to-me Thompson Lake hike, I explored a side trail when I couldn’t reach my goal destination. On the Annette Lake trail, I shot photos of pack goats, something I’ve never seen before. And on our hike to Teneriffe Falls, I went without Ajax on an overcast Friday afternoon.

In over 40 years of hiking, I've never come across domestic goats -- with packs, no less -- hiking on a trail. What fun! — In over 40 years of hiking, I’ve never come across domestic goats — with packs, no less — hiking on a trail. What fun!

If you find yourself taking action, remember to reward yourself with non-food items for every success. Actively seek out social support to maintain your enthusiasm. Keep going!

Maintenance Stage: I Still Am

The final stage in the TTM of change is maintenance, represented by, “I still am.” In this stage, you have been able to maintain the behavior for at least six months, and you have proven ways to avoid temptation such that you rarely think of old habits. An example for me is having given up a game app in December. I rarely even think of it anymore, but it was incredibly hard going without it for the first month.

My stage of change for building a hiking habit is maintenance: I derive so much joy and pleasure from hiking weekly with my dog that I can't see going back to a life without it. — My stage of change for building a hiking habit is maintenance: I derive so much joy and pleasure from hiking weekly with my dog that I can’t see going back to a life without it.

In this stage, I’ve found it wonderfully rewarding to help others experience nature, whether it’s through writing articles for the Mountaineer Magazine, introducing my daughter to new hiking trails, or mentoring novice hikers. I may have other areas of my life where I need to make changes — business expansion and technology are two of them — but as I get familiar with how change works in areas where I’ve succeeded, I learn that I have the tools and knowledge within to make changes in other areas.

If you have found this article helpful, please forward to your friends or consider posting a comment. I love hearing from readers.

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How to Evoke Change by Hiking McClellan Butte

Last week I shared how the acronym, DARN CAT, helps me identify change talk. To test whether it helps evoke change that lasts — and grows — I set my sights on hiking McClellan Butte. My reasons included:

add to my hiking choices
develop change skills that might carry over to other daunting challenges
continue my ongoing search for BLING: Beauty, Love, Inspiration, Novelty, and Growth
overcome a fear (False Evidence Appearing Real) that this particular trail is not safe enough to do with my dog Ajax
use my superpowers in new ways to grow my self-efficacy in other areas

So, early Tuesday morning, May 28, Ajax and I arrived at the McClellan Butte parking lot before anyone else.

Add to Choices

Many of my hikes over the past four years have been excursions along the I-90 corridor in Western Washington. Visiting Pratt, Olallie, Island, and Rainbow Lakes this spring while snow still covered the upper trails made them feel new. By nature, I’m relatively cautious. I usually prefer to explore unfamiliar trails with someone who already knows the trail. Visiting a new trail alone — with nobody to consult except my dog — pushes me outside of my comfort zone. In effect, it parallels what I’m trying to do with my coaching career. By adding to my hiking choices and trying something new, I’m hoping to evoke change to face scarier things, like marketing.

On May 28 my dog and I faced drizzle, fog, and snow to evoke change in myself. We had McClellan Butte all to ourselves the entire morning.

YOUR TURN: If you are working on changing in some area, whether from the last blog post or something new, think about your WHY. What will be different if you make this change? How will your life improve? Think of similar changes you’ve made in the past. What helped you succeed? Can you use those same skills to help you?

Evoke Change with New Skills

Since sharing my commitment, I practiced additional steps of change to help ensure success:

Free my schedule – by rescheduling my usual Tuesday hike to the following day, I gave us as much time as possible to succeed.
Shape the path – I filled the tank with gas and packed extra food and water, tempting treats for Ajax, a sit pad, gaiters, poles, rain and snow gear, and microspikes.
Boost enthusiasm — since I love to write and help others succeed in the mountains, I submitted trial trip and Ebird reports to help fuel my excitement
Gather information — checking weather reports and recent trip reports (see the one I prepared for the WTA/Washington Trails Association) is something I do before every trip, to arm myself with as much knowledge as possible
Prepare navigation — by studying the route, I anticipated paying closer attention at the beginning.

YOUR TURN: Think about some of the skills you need to make your change. What obstacles might you encounter? Who do you know who has done what you want to do? Might they have some advice or suggestions to make your journey easier?

Evoke Change by Searching for BLING

One of the acronyms I turn to when I go on adventures (courtesy of my mother) is to look for Beauty, Love, Inspiration, Novelty, and Growth.

Beauty

We wound through power lines, old forests with enormous cedars and Doug firs, service and forest roads, snowfields, and talus slopes. McClellan Butte trail has some of everything. Even in the fog, I could tell I wanted to return when I could see more of my surroundings.

Love

Joy filled me as 17 species of birds serenaded us, including olive-sided flycatchers, warblers, three types of thrushes, and a sapsucker. Exploration with my dog scouting before me, periodically checking to make sure I’m right behind him, always brings a smile to my face. Fresh cedar perfumed the air near immense logs that must have been cut recently. As we navigated downed logs, tree roots, and snow slopes with confidence and ease, my body thrummed and buzzed with vitality. Nature fills me with life, peace, and love like nothing else.

Inspiration

Hiking into the clouds, as fog turned to drizzle, turned the mountains magical, mysterious. To feel confident, competent, and empowered in the mountains feeds my soul and makes me crave more.

Novelty

The last time I hiked this trail was 25 years ago. I couldn’t remember anything about it, so everything about it felt new. Anytime we evoke change, we face novelty. And if we look at the good that could come from it rather than the scary, it makes novelty feel more engaging and fun.

Growth

The vulnerability of hiking solo under challenging conditions grows my confidence, heightens my senses, and makes me more self-aware.

YOUR TURN: As you evoke change, can you use the elements of BLING to make it more intriguing, less scary, and more compelling? What could happen if you reframe your obstacles into positive opportunities? How does that change your resistance?

Overcome a Fear

One of my primary objectives was to rewrite the internal story that I faced higher, maybe unnecessary, risks exploring alone. I told myself that anytime I felt out of my element, we would turn around. If I felt like it was unsafe for me or my dog, there was zero shame in returning another time. Others had reported turning around at the snow. My goal was to see as much of the trail as we could under current conditions.

When facing anything scary, whether going into enclosed spaces, attending a party where you know nobody, entering a gym for the first time, or trying anything new, give yourself an escape hatch. There is nothing wrong with starting something and then deciding not to continue. Once you overcome inertia by taking a small action, you’re most of the way there. If you never try, you’ll never succeed.

Snow Runnels

When we reached the first of seven snow runnels on the north slope, starting at about mile 2.5, the amount of snowpack surprised me. Ajax easily scampered across, his claws behaving as natural crampons, and I soon realized the footing was solid enough that I didn’t need traction. I did, however, need a pole to test solidity.

At the final runnel, just before the trail veered west, I could no longer hear running water. Ajax shook, drawing my attention. I glanced up to see him retreat from several large tree wells. (I will never take my dog anywhere there might be hidden crevasses). We’d reached our turn-around point.

A tree well forming on the west side of the Butte. As the snow melts, postholing (legs jutting through thin snow) becomes more common and can lead to strains, sprains, and falls. — A tree well formed on the west side of the Butte. As the snow melts, feet can poke through thin snow crusts, a process called postholing, leading to strains, sprains, and falls if you’re not paying attention to where you step.

YOUR TURN: When thinking about your change, what, if anything, are you afraid of? If you had no fear, what might you do? What tiny steps might you take to confront and overcome your fear?

Use Your Superpowers to Evoke Change

Except… Had we?

I strapped on my microspikes and got out my second pole, preparing to descend. After testing out my footing for a minute, I realized Ajax was still sitting where we’d stopped. Despite calling him, he refused to come, which is unusual. He looked at me as though to say, “No way, Mama, we came all this way. We’re not finished yet!”

Laughing at his expression, I got an idea. Maybe he was right. Maybe we weren’t done yet. If he was willing to keep trying, I could, too. I used my mountaineering skills to kick steps well above the dangerous zone. Ajax diligently followed in my footsteps, and a few minutes later, we safely jumped off the snow and landed on the dirt trail.

Footprints lead up to a vertical scramble, the summit block of McClellan Butte. I knew, as they climbed straight up that we'd gone as far as I'd intended, and as high as Ajax could safely go. — Footprints lead up to a vertical scramble, the summit block of McClellan Butte. I knew, as they climbed straight up that we’d gone as far as I’d intended, and as high as Ajax could safely go.

The danger behind us, we traveled west on deep snow, then north to the base of the summit block, a vertical scramble and our final destination. I wished my “Energizer dog” a happy ninth birthday and gave him extra treats when, at last, we found a safe, level dirt patch to take a long, foggy, rainy break before retreating to the car.

YOUR TURN: What are your superpowers and how might you get creative using them for this change? If you tried one way and failed, what could you learn from that experience that might make you more successful next time?

Takeaways

Ajax is the best hiking companion I could ever wish for. He never complains, is always willing to try new things, and has incredible stamina for a nine-year-old Labraheeler. On this adventure to evoke change, he helped me see things differently, not once, but twice, when I considered turning around.

A natural bench just before we headed up the long straightaway across talus fields.

As I review our successful experiment, four takeaways relate to the larger picture of how we evoke change:

It’s okay to start something multiple times. You will never succeed at anything unless you try.
Facing and overcoming tiny fears makes you more courageous and more capable of addressing larger fears next time. It’s a skill as well as a muscle. The more you work it, the stronger you become.
There is no shame in stopping or turning around, only in never trying in the first place.
If you establish reasonable expectations – exploration, adventure, discovery, BLING – you might enjoy your experience instead of struggling through it.

So have fun, play, explore, and take chances. They are what create our lives. I’m already planning my next solo adventure with my dog. Where will we end up next?

If this post resonates with you, or if you have questions or ideas for future topics, please share in the comments. This blog is for both you AND me. I want to provide content that helps. And writers always love hearing from readers!

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DARN CAT: How to Use Change Talk on Recent Hikes

During the past few weeks, Ajax and I have been exploring the trails leading to Rainbow and Island Lake, Pratt Lake Basin, and Dirty Harry’s Peak. On our hikes, I’ve reviewed countless acronyms for my upcoming coaching exam. One that was tricky to learn was DARN CAT, an acronym taken from Miller and Rollnick’s classic book, Motivational Interviewing. As you read this post, see if you can identify change talk within yourself.

Snowy boulder field leading down to Pratt Lake Basin from the Exit 47 trailhead.

What is Change Talk?

How do we know when we truly want to change? In the coaching parlance of Motivational Interviewing, the acronym DARN CAT stands for Desire, Ability, Reason, Need, Commitment, Actuation, and Taking Steps. The first four indicate preparation for change, while the last three represent mobilization or getting started.

Without hearing change talk in a conversation, you might guess that someone is not yet ready, willing, or able to make changes. In other words, they may still be using “sustain talk.” And the most brilliant coaching, convincing, arguing, or strategizing will fail until they are ready. Let’s identify the change talk buzzwords.

Desire for Change

Someone seeking change has a desire for something different. This might be a longing for more free time to do something they love, more autonomy at their job, or a body free from pain. It could also be wanting to write a book, learn something new, or leave a painful relationship.

Change talk buzzwords that match such a desire are want, wish, love, or like. Whenever I go hiking, my primary needs are to move, connect with nature, and explore the beauty around me. Back in January, I decided to try to add richness to my hiking practice. As much as I love hiking with my Labraheeler, Ajax, I wanted to include humans on some of my outings.

JOURNAL PROMPT: Reflect on the different roles you play in your life: parent, sibling, worker, teammate, child, grandchild, outdoor enthusiast. Pick one to focus on for the sake of the following prompts. What is one thing you want to change related to that role? Why?

Change Talk: Ability

Another preparation phase of change talk is feeling like you are capable of doing something different. In my example of looking for a hiking partner, I could have met new people by going on several Mountaineers hikes. Or leading a few Meet-up outings. Looking for others seeking partners on social media was another possibility.

Change talk keywords indicating ability include can, could, might, or perhaps. Sure, I could do any of those things listed above. However, I know Mountaineers groups often have 12 participants. As an introvert, I do better in a pair or a small group. I also like to include my dog, and I wasn’t excited about hiking with strangers whose abilities I didn’t know. I chose to use my writing superpower to invite a few people to join me on Tuesdays.

Navigating the icy trail to Pratt Lake Basin required focus, skill, and some luck with Mother Nature. The trail pictured above turned us around 6 weeks earlier when it was completely covered in snow.

Just as we harness our abilities to overcome obstacles on the trail, we can tap into our strengths and superpowers to navigate change as we face life’s challenges.

JOURNAL PROMPT: Using the change you’re interested in making from “Desire”, list a few steps you could take that might help you head in the desired direction. Don’t edit yet, just create a list.

Reason for Change

If you pay close attention to your thoughts, you might recognize phrases like “I would feel X if I did Y” or “Doing A would give me more energy for B.” Sustain talk might use “Yes, but…” in favor of continuing as is.

I continue to love hiking solo. But my reasons for adding other hikers include: having great philosophical conversations, feeling safer while exploring new trails, and growing my hiking community for the time when my 9-year-old dog may not be able to join me. I also enjoy teaching others what I know about hiking and enjoying the wilderness. Asking yourself WHY is a big part of your journey through any sort of change.

High stream run-off on Dirty Harry's Peak just past the Museum juncture. Stay left and low to find the safest way across. — High stream run-off on Dirty Harry’s Peak just past the Museum juncture. Stay left and low to find the safest way across.

Why Pratt Lake and Dirty Harry’s Peak?

So why attempt Pratt Lake Basin in the early season? My exploration on May 9 was my pre-Mother’s Day gift to myself. I love visiting alpine lakes, especially those accessible from Exit 47. And I wanted to see whether the snow we discovered on our March 28 trip had melted enough to allow access. The snow on the way to Rainbow and Island Lakes was deep and miserably posthole-prone, so I decided to turn us around to explore Pratt Lake.

My reasons for visiting Dirty Harry’s Peak and Balcony on May 14 are different. My daughter turned twenty last week, so this was a celebration of motherhood. The peak hike is steep, one that few people I know would enjoy, which is part of the allure. Hiking it later in the season would be harder on Ajax. I also knew we’d have some great spring birdsong: 27 species including flycatchers, thrushes, and warblers.

Change in nature is expected. Change talk in ourselves sometimes surprises us. Indian Paintbrush on Dirty Harry's Peak. Wildflowers are starting to bloom. Now is a great time to go hiking! — Change in nature is expected. Change talk in ourselves sometimes surprises us. Indian Paintbrush on Dirty Harry’s Peak. Wildflowers are starting to bloom. Now is a great time to go hiking!

JOURNAL PROMPT: Understanding our reasons for change provides us with motivation and direction. Using your possible change, use Precision Nutrition’s sample Five Whys exercise to get at the real reason you want to make a change.

Change Talk: Need

The final preparation stage of change is to identify why you feel obligated to change. Change talk buzzwords include ought to, have to, and the ever-popular and soul-sucking should. Whether these beliefs come from outside of ourselves or inside is a topic for another blog post. But suffice it to say, if we want change, feel we can change, and have reasons and a need for change, then we are much more likely to start into the motivation stages of change.

JOURNAL PROMPT: With your change in mind, think about how your life might be different if you make this change. Then think about your life in a year, five years, ten years if you don’t make this change. This exercise can help you identify a strong need by using your creativity and imagination to picture two futures. Which one is more compelling?

Mt. Rainier as seen from the summit of Dirty Harry's Peak on May 14, 2024. Ajax and I had the mountain to ourselves and plenty of time to think about DARN CAT. — Mt. Rainier from the summit of Dirty Harry’s Peak on May 14, 2024. Ajax and I had the mountain to ourselves and plenty of time to think about DARN CAT.

Commitment

Following the preparation phase of change one moves into action. Change talk in the commitment phase might use the buzzwords promise, intention, or phrases such as “I am going to.” In this phase, it’s important to focus the change talk on what you want rather than what you don’t want or want to avoid.

Using my example of finding more hiking partners, my commitment to myself and the universe was to show up on Tuesday mornings, rain or shine, and hike with whoever joined me. And while that commitment changes with weather — especially high winds — it has gotten me to do 25 hikes and rambles so far this year.

The author pauses for a selfie and snack about a mile from the summit of Dirty Harry's Peak where there are some lovely logs carved into seats. — The author pauses for a selfie and snack about a mile from the summit of Dirty Harry’s Peak where there are some lovely logs carved into seats.

Once I realized I wanted to include solo hiking and hiking with partners, I changed it to hiking with a partner 1-2 times a month. Realize that your commitment doesn’t mean you’ll do something forever. It’s malleable as you learn more about yourself and grow. If you consider it as binding as a wedding vow or contract, it may feel too intimidating to even start. Instead, think of it as an experiment.

JOURNAL PROMPT: Just as we commit to our exercise or nutrition goals, we need to commit to our personal growth and change. What experiment are you ready to try related to the change you want to make? If it helps, try setting SMART goals that are specific, measurable, action-oriented, realistic, and time-stamped.

Actuation

Actuation is a fancy word for “move to action” or “activation.” It speaks to your willingness to change. Change talk keywords include “I am ready for…” or “I will start on X day.” In my hiking example, I committed to showing up on Tuesday mornings and hiking with whoever showed up. Then all I needed to do was to pack my things, get my dog in the car, and drive to the designated trailhead.

One tip I find in this stage is to be flexible and ready for anything. When we started our hike toward Island and Rainbow Lake, I didn’t know what the snowpack would look like. I had backup plans to visit Pratt Lake or even return to Olallie Lake if the snow presented too much of an obstacle. The most important thing is to take action. We cannot expect any sort of change without action.

On our hike down from Dirty Harry's Balcony I saw this wonderful view of McClellan Butte through the trees. I've put off trying it for years since I haven't done it since 1990. COMMITMENT: I will hike it this year and report it in my blog. — On our hike down from Dirty Harry’s Balcony I saw this wonderful view of McClellan Butte through the trees. I’ve put off trying it for years since I haven’t done it since 1990. *COMMITMENT: I will hike it this year and report it in my blog.*

JOURNAL PROMPT: Consider your first few steps toward change. Any journey begins with a single step. Taking that first step towards change is the hardest thing to do because you’re breaking out of a rut and heading into the unknown. And that’s scary. It’s also the beginning of something transformative. Pick one action, just one, and add it to your calendar. It can be as simple as making a phone call or texting your coach to set up an appointment.

Taking Steps

Finally, “taking steps” refers to whatever you do to take action. Change talk buzzwords include “I went out and did…” or “Yesterday I chose…” My steps include committing to my blog readers that I will hike McClellan Butte and share my journey in a future blog post.

Here’s what DARN CAT looks like in action:

McClellan Butte, my next hike. I haven't done it in over 30 years, so it will be an exploratory adventure. Join me in June to find out what happens! — McClellan Butte, my next hike. I haven’t done it in over 30 years, so it will be an exploratory adventure. Join me in June to find out what happens!

I’ve identified a desire (to hike McClellan Butte). I know I am capable of hiking it; I did so 35 years ago and I do comparable hikes several times a month. My reasons include adding to my hiking repertoire, getting a new view of the I-90 corridor, and overcoming a fear (false evidence appearing real) that it’s not safe.

As for need, I seek adventure and novelty along with growing my self-efficacy. If I can overcome fears within my superpower arena, I can use that growing muscle in areas that vex me, such as marketing and technology.

Assuming the weather cooperates, I will hike it on Tuesday, May 28, and share it in my first June post. I have added it to my calendar and announced it publicly. Excitement is building, telling me it’s time. I’m ready. The rest is up to fate.

Hard-packed snow near the summit of Dirty Harry's Peak. — Hard-packed snow near the summit of Dirty Harry’s Peak.

JOURNAL PROMPT: Each small step we take on our journey brings us closer to the change we seek. Find one person to share your action with. It could be an accountability partner, your coach, a work colleague, a close friend or family member, or a blog reader. By speaking your intention out loud, you build momentum toward change.

Takeaways

My recent long adventures to Pratt Lake Basin and Dirty Harry’s Peak have prepared me physically for McClellan’s Butte. My review of change talk and DARN CAT have given me the fuel to see that I am ready to make this change, all I needed was to own it and commit to it.

You can embark on a unique journey of change, using the principles of MI’s change talk. What change are you facing? Share on the blog so we can all learn and grow.

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How to Notice and Name in Life and in Birding

My husband and I spent a week near South Padre Island, TX witnessing spring migration. Between the two of us, we shot 5000 photos and identified 175 unique bird species. Just as “notice and name” is an important skill in birding, it’s also a crucial life skill when facing change. To change any habits, you need to notice whenever you’re doing a particular action so that you can name what purpose it serves — or decide how to change it.

These blooms in South Texas reminded me of bottle brushes. I laughed when I learned that is what they are called.

This week, I highlight three of the 35 new life bird species we had the privilege of seeing: the Southern Lapwing, the Mottled Owl, and the Bay-Breasted Warbler. With each story, I share tie-in examples of a life of embracing and accepting change.

Southern Lapwing

On Saturday, April 21, we visited the Llano Grande Resort and Golf Club golf course in Mercedes, TX. We wanted to spot the southern lapwing. Common in South America, they have a black breast, white belly, gray head, and bronzy shoulder. To see a bird in Texas that never strays north of Guatemala would be amazing.

We joined 15-20 other folks with big camera lenses, tripods, and spotting scopes. An employee at the resort’s front desk told us that someone had seen it on the back nine holes. My husband started a phone tree with the other birders in hopes that the first person who found the bird would let everyone else know they’d spotted it. “Team birding” in action.

Southern Lapwing on the fairway. This shorebird is common in South America but had never been seen in North America before. — Southern Lapwing on the fairway. This shorebird is common in South America but has never been seen in North America before.

Team Birding in Action

Several people rented golf carts for $25. My husband and I preferred to walk. Within twenty minutes, his phone lit up with “We found it!” Drivers in two golf carts raced our way. The woman in the first one picked me up and the man in the second one picked up my husband. As we rushed to the fairway, I prayed the lapwing wouldn’t fly off before we could see it.

Then, voila! We shot photos and celebrated with the other six who found it, until WHAACK! A group of tournament players sent their balls down the fairway. One ball rolled to within ten yards of the bird. Startled, it flew off toward a pond.

Determined to keep our eyes on it so that our friend and his daughter, who were still thirty minutes away, would see it, we followed it. Minutes after our friend’s arrival, the bird flew again, this time disappearing from the golf course.

Notice and Name 1: Get Help

To locate the southern lapwing, we needed help. Others had spotted it days before we did, reporting to Ebird so we knew to look for it. The man in the office knew where the bird liked to hang out. One of the birders was a tour guide with years of experience in the area. And we had twenty additional sets of eyes looking for it.

Likewise, when we are trying to change our habits or behaviors, we benefit from the knowledge and wisdom of people who have made the same change we want to make. We can hire a trainer or coach who knows how to get to the summit of a high mountain or ride in a century. To learn a foreign language we can find a native speaker to practice with. And if a friend gets a cool job, we can ask them how they did it.

A stunning male Baltimore Oriole in breeding plumage. It was one of dozens attracted to orange slices set up in a 4-plot preserve on South Padre Island, an area we referred to as "Sheepshead" after the street's name. The plot was designated and reclaimed for migrating birds. — A stunning male Baltimore Oriole in breeding plumage. It was one of dozens attracted to orange slices set up in a 4-plot preserve on South Padre Island, an area we referred to as “Sheepshead” after the street’s name. The plot was designated and reclaimed for migrating birds.

Coaches, teachers, counselors, and medical professionals all have substantial wisdom and knowledge. But first, we must WANT to change. We must be ready, willing, and able to take action on our behalf, even when it gets hard. Just as my husband and I actively targeted this particular bird, whenever we face change, we notice and name what we no longer want but then figure out what we do want.

Mottled Owl in a Thunderstorm

Later that same evening, we drove west for more than two hours to join a guided nocturnal tour on the 88,000-acre Santa Margarita Ranch. At 9 p.m. when we started walking in the dark, we sweated in the 88-degree heat and humidity. We caught our second rarity, a mottled owl. This medium-sized owl is found from Mexico to Brazil, with rare visitations to Texas.

The blaring sounds of thousands of cane toads and crickets drowned out the sounds of our footsteps as we traipsed wordlessly across two thin sandy tracks. Growing clouds quickly obscured the full moon. A storm approached, adding urgency to our trek. We found it challenging to notice and name species around us when we hardly see our feet, but we soon adapted to night vision.

A male indigo bunting in breeding plumage was another of my daytime favorites at the Sheepshead location on South Padre Island.

We walked in pitch-blackness except for the few minutes it took to cross the clearing near The Wall along the Mexican border. My internal storyteller pictured crossing the border to freedom in the middle of the night. Flashes of lightning lit up the skies for miles, startling me with their intensity.

Calling Him In

After forty minutes without a single word from any of us, one of the two guides halted our group of 15 and directed us into a semi-circle, whispering, “I’ll call him in. Get ready.” We stood still, poised, cameras aimed upward, as the thunder rolled around us and sweat dripped into my eyes. Though I longed to chug from my water bottle, I feared gulping might prevent the owl from visiting. Worse, it might make the others blame me.

Suddenly, a beacon of light flashed in the air. There! The owl only stayed for a few seconds before darting back into the shadows. We’d found our second rarity on the same day.

The Mottled Owl looks as startled to see us as we were to see it.

The return walk, equally devoid of chatter, no longer felt charged with anticipation. Instead, I found myself wondering if the storm would catch us. Our evening symphony included 6 eastern screech owls, 2 great horned owls, a bobwhite (which happens to sound exactly like its namesake), 11 common pauraques, 2 yellow-billed cuckoos, and 2 common nighthawks. And when we finally reached the cars, the rain had not yet started. It would cause a 25-degree drop in temperature, making birding more enjoyable Sunday morning.

Notice and Name 2: Overcome Obstacles

I’ve thought of that night several times since. When we’re in the thick of change, we can feel like we’re lost in a dense forest with deafening noise (other people, offers, struggles, obstacles, you name it) trying to distract us and capture our attention. The trick is to continue to focus on what matters.

Notice and name is a strategy used in both birding and change. These half dozen ducklings tooled around near South Padre Island's mangroves. — Notice and name is a strategy used in both birding and change. These half dozen ducklings tooled around near South Padre Island’s mangroves.

Whenever you start to feel overwhelmed, pause. Notice and name what you’re feeling. Then think about all the tools available to you. People who can help. Your previous successes and superpowers, as I mentioned in my last post. Give up the need to know exactly how to get from point A to B and trust that it will. More importantly, notice and name the stories that get in your way.

Bay-Breasted Warbler

The third highlight this week is the breeding male Bay-Breasted Warbler. At least a third of our 40 hours of birding were done at a small site called the Valley Land Fund Lots on South Padre Island. It includes four properties that have been repurposed to attract migrating birds, especially warblers. I was impressed by the diversity of birds in such a small area. Such diversity brings lots of people. I soon found myself overwhelmed and wandered the perimeter where I could peer in peace.

I shot a photo of a pretty, distinct-looking bird I hadn’t yet seen. Cornell describes it as having a “dark-streaked back, butter-yellow neck patch, black mask, and a rich dark bay color on the crown, throat, and flanks.” He tended to stay still longer than all the other warblers; perhaps that’s what made him my favorite. I noted his unique coloring, but I couldn’t yet identify it. Who might be able to notice and name it?

A lovely male bay-breasted warbler peers at me as though wondering what all the fuss was. — A stunning male bay-breasted warbler peers at me as though wondering what all the fuss was.

As soon as our birding friend identified it, he insisted I show him where I’d seen it. I realized I’d spotted an important bird. Within minutes of leading him to my find, a dozen others with long lenses came to look. In Yellowstone National Park when people stop their cars to gawk at black bears, we refer to such groups as “bear jams.” In this case, I caused a “bird jam.”

A "bird jam" I caused around the bay-breasted warbler. — A “bird jam” I caused around the bay-breasted warbler.

Notice and Name 3: Shine and Share

This third bird taught me two important lessons. First: shine – by being yourself and going about what you do best. This tiny bird had just migrated from gosh knows where. He encountered a thunderstorm the night before and was tired, hungry, and thirsty. His sole mission was to find enough food so he could continue to his final destination and start a new family.

Likewise, I’m a wildlife enthusiast and writer. I capture my experiences in photos and words. When I notice and name my abilities and skills, and enjoy them myself, others get to benefit from them. If I can supply readers with a fraction of the wonder and joy I experienced, I will have done what I intended.

A breeding male black-throated green warbler, another East Coast migrator.

And second, share with the world. These birds share their beauty simply by flying massive distances and touching down to rest. By bringing these three birds to your attention, I realize that I am a teacher. I may not stand up in front of a classroom every day, but when I hike or bird with friends, when I write a blog post or newsletter article, or when I coach an online session, I shine my light of knowledge and hope for others.

Summer Update

I will be creating new blogs less frequently from now until July 25. At that time, I hope to have completed the NBC-HWC coaching exam and will return to weekly posts. If you have a burning question or a comment about this or other posts, please share it below.

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How to Find Balance on the Trail and in Life

Last Thursday, Ajax and I started up the Old Si trail around 6:30 a.m. via the Little Si trailhead. I’d received some uplifting health news the day before, and I wanted to challenge myself beyond Squak, Cougar, and Tiger Mountains. This week, I explore how to find balance on the trail and in life against the backdrop of photos from the Old Si trail.

Our hiking route took us from the lower left corner (Little Si) around the Boulder Garden Loop Trail to the Old Si Trail and all the way to the Teneriffe Connector, where we turned around. — The ascent: our hiking route took us from the lower left corner (Little Si) around the Boulder Garden Loop Trail to the Old Si Trail and up to the Teneriffe Connector Trail, where we turned around.

The Ascent: Find Balance One Step at a Time

The Old Si trail meanders through the Boulder Garden Loop before continuing steeply toward Si’s summit. The trail intersects with the “new” trail in two spots. It helps to pay attention to make sure you’re on the right path.

During the hike, two things stood out:

The absence of people: Very few people were hiking the Old Si trail. It was a beautiful midweek morning in April. Mt. Si is one of the most popular hikes near Seattle. Except for eight hikers going up as we descended, we had the upper mountain completely to ourselves.
The unrelenting steepness: Old Si has exposed root-filled sections and is steeper than I remember from the last time I hiked it a few years ago. It’s likely why people choose the longer, more gently graded, and newer Mt. Si route. Hikers who enjoy the steep old trail on Mailbox, or the Cable/Section trails on Tiger Mountain, would love it.

A particularly rooted and steep section of the Old Si trail reminded me of parts of trails to Mailbox and Rachel Lake. Such steep trails require that hikers repeatedly find balance, similar to life when faced with countless obstacles.

Drawing Parallels To Life

After forty-some years of hiking, I implicitly trust my bodily-kinesthetic and natural-environmental superpowers. (Identify your superpowers here.) Whenever the trail gets steep, I know to slow down, take a quick break if I need one, and have alternative plans ready in case anything goes wrong. Sometimes I even speed up to get a challenging part behind me.

When I am alone, which is almost always my goal, I trust my body, my dog Ajax, my physical preparation, and four decades of wilderness experience. The mountains are my happy place.

An author selfie with Mt. Rainier in the background, taken from the summit area on Mt. Si. — An author’s selfie with Mt. Rainier in the background, taken from the summit area on Mt. Si.

However, when I look at challenges in my life, I lack the same confidence. Recently my daily “steep ascents” have included: A new health diagnosis in January (jagged boulders). Subsequent changes to my diet and training (rooty section). Updating and launching two websites (a cliff). Scrambling to find trusted pet care right before a trip (mud). The logistics of starting a second business and finding new clients (another sheer cliff). Completing coaching hours for a national credential (thick thorny brush). Maintaining house chores and pet care duties while my husband coaches throws in the afternoons (slick pebbles). The list sometimes feels endless.

What Are Your Obstacles?

Pause for a moment to think about the obstacles in your path. What challenges are you facing? How do you face them? Do you avoid tasks or charge forward? Maybe you pause and approach with caution or race in the opposite direction. Or perhaps you ignore them and hope they’ll disappear. How might you face them that would be more loving toward yourself and productive?

On the trail, I confidently take the next step forward. In life, however, I sometimes become a deer in the headlights or an ostrich burying my head in the sand, neither of which is helpful. Such fight, flight, or freeze responses bring me to a halt until I find a way past feelings of overwhelm.

My analogy breaks down a little bit in that on a trail we usually have two choices: forward or back. In life, we have so many obstacles and challenges thrown at us that it might look a little like this sign covered in stickers. But the approach, TAKE THE NEXT STEP, still holds.

Here’s the tricky thing: Whenever I challenge myself to grow and try new things, as I’ve been doing since starting this blog in July 2021, I’m constantly exploring an ever-expanding world I no longer — or don’t yet — know. The trail seems to shift under my feet like quicksand. Day-to-day life is not predictable. Injuries, illnesses, job challenges, relationship issues — all these things place us in the middle of an overgrown path we’ve never traveled before.

Identify Your Superpowers

So why do we expect that we can immediately solve our problems in such changing times? I’m trying to trust my innate wisdom and guidance like I already do experiences on the trail. Both require faith, endurance, and resilience. I’m also focusing on my superpowers — bodily-kinesthetic, natural-environmental, verbal-linguistic, and self-interior — rather than my shortcomings.

I help clients become aware of their skills, strengths, special talents, and superpowers so they can focus on and expand them, rather than getting down on themselves because of perceived weaknesses. If we concentrate on the negatives, we’ll always see more negatives. By concentrating on what we do WELL, we cultivate, grow, and see more good.

The Summit: I Find Balance and Moments of Clarity

At the two-hour mark, we spotted our first snow in a wooded patch right before we reached the rocky summit area. The rocks are where most people stop for a snack before heading down. Despite the steepness of the route, I felt pleased with our performance. Time to grab a snack and check out the views.

The parallel to life’s challenges is not lost on me: when we’re in the midst of struggle, we can lose sight of where we’re headed. But when we arrive at our destination and look back, we realize that although we might have been off target for much of the time, we eventually got where we wanted to go. Maybe not exactly as we expected, but the endurance and resilience we’ve built from other experiences have given us the fortitude to keep trying.

The Glory of the Views

The first view of Mt. Rainier due south stole my breath away. I grinned at the bands of lenticular clouds wisping across her flanks. I felt like calling hi to a friend I hadn’t seen in a while. A little farther along, we reached a pair of benches where I dropped my pack, got out some kibble and water for my dog Ajax, and had some cashews and a protein shake. We listened for chipmunks, jays, and other birds while admiring the views of North Bend and Puget Sound. I marveled at the miracle of having such a popular peak all to ourselves. Where is everyone, I asked myself.

A calm peace came over me as I tugged on a long-sleeved shirt and down jacket to ward off the inevitable chill of an April breeze. Hiking in the wilderness is as close to paradise as I can get. I remembered the fist-in-the-air elation I felt when I completed my 50th coaching session. Or when I received the good health news.

When our pet sitters agreed to host Ajax for a week of travel, or I landed some new clients, I felt similar satisfaction. But all the “life” examples rely on interactions with other people. With solo hiking, my results were completely under my power. Succeeding in the mountains gives me a way to find balance when I feel like things are overwhelming.

Anytime Ajax is sick, injured, or compromised in his care in some way, I face a huge obstacle. It's almost like having a sick child. — Anytime Ajax is sick, injured, or compromised in his care in some way, I face a huge obstacle. It’s almost like having a sick child.

In the words of my spiritual coach, Tama Kieves, abundance invites abundance. All the work, worry, and effort of taking one step in front of another paid off. Successes in life and hiking converged. A moment of peace, well deserved.

The Descent: Return to Comfort and Familiarity

After our brief pause, we headed north toward the Mt. Teneriffe Connector trail to explore other vantage points, but the ice made it hard to find balance. I decided we’d save Teneriffe for another day and explore more in the Boulder Garden Loop. We turned back knowing the mountains would shed their snow in another month or so.

About 20 minutes past the snowy area, a group of 8 hikers under heavy packs slowly made their way up the steep trail. We stepped aside to let them pass. “You’re up here early,” one hiker said. Just the way I like it, I thought. Another woman told her companion that they’d go down the gentler Si trail so they wouldn’t have to suffer as much on the way down. She commented on how WHITE my dog was and I simply smiled, knowing how muddy he can get when the trail is covered in puddles instead of snow.

Beyond the main Si route toward Teneriffe, the trail is still covered with hard-packed snow and ice. Microspikes will help you find balance.

As we made our way down the trail, I listened intently for birds I might have missed on the way up. I shared things I’m grateful for with Ajax. When we reached the Boulder Garden Loop, I heard a purple finch. Having heard the same bird on our way up, I thought to myself, “I bet when I come down I’ll have to look him up again on Merlin.” Sure enough. Practice makes … better. Experience teaches us.

Trail and Life Skills In Parallel

Some of the many skills I have cultivated in the mountains — such as route finding, layering, endurance, gear management, strength, and pacing — have parallels in life. To find balance in the mountains, we need to periodize our training program to include a mixture of easy and hard outings. Likewise in life, we need to have goals we know we can achieve as well as those that stretch us. The bite-sized achievements teach us how to keep striving for those goals that are more challenging.

The trail leading up to the north side of the Haystack, a pile of rock visible for miles around at the summit of Mt. Si.

Finding your way in the mountains is akin to knowing where you want to go in life (i.e. having a goal) as well as how to get there. If you want new clients, for example, you need to know who your target clients are, what they want, and how best to connect with them to cultivate a strong relationship.

Endurance on the trail means you have the physical stamina to get where you want. In life’s challenges, we need to cultivate emotional resilience and fortitude to endure tough situations while also being patient, gentle, and forgiving of ourselves.

Finally, related to pacing: if we charge forward without thinking things through, we may burn ourselves out before we reach our destination. Sometimes a cautious, slower approach to our goals is better than flying Mach 2 with our hair on fire.

Please Share Your Challenges

Steep and challenging hikes provide a beautiful metaphor for the challenging portions of life’s journey. The more we can learn how to manage our stress, pace ourselves, and find balance among all our life roles, the more we can thrive during times of stress or ease. Whatever your challenge, you can overcome it.

Mossy boulder in the Boulder Garden Loop.

What obstacles are you facing as you strive to find balance? Please share your comments so we can all help and learn from each other. If you would like to schedule a free 15-minute consultation with me to see how we might collaborate contact me at either Thrive Clues or Body Results.

Featured

Surrender Control: How to Focus on Skills and Habits Instead

Sometimes life feels like it is spinning out of control. Pet care disappears before a trip. A health diagnosis or injury catches you off guard. Money issues leave you feeling unprepared. Worries pile up. An event ends with a different outcome than you expected. It happens. What if you surrender control, and instead, focus on the habits you need to acquire and skills you need to develop to reach your goals?

New signs on the Whittaker Wilderness Peak Trail.

Whittaker Wilderness and Doughty Falls

Last week, Ajax, a hiking friend, and I visited Whittaker Wilderness Peak adding a loop including Shy Bear Pass to Doughty Falls. Our trip started great. We were first on the trail, with beautiful weather, upbeat moods, and time at the summit to grab a snack and sign the summit registry before continuing to explore Cougar Mountain.

But I overestimated how much mileage she could safely handle, leaving her dehydrated, in pain, and overly tired. A little less than a mile from the trailhead, I left her resting to dash back to the car with Ajax and bring her extra water. The word she used at the end of our hike was “miserable.”

A selfie at Doughty Falls, what my daughter called "Doughty Trickle" in July when there is no running water. — A selfie at Doughty Falls, what my daughter called “Doughty Leak” in July when there is no running water.

I shared posts about this particular trail in How to Assess Your Progress (June 2023) and Expect the Unexpected (July 2023). In both, the outcome was far from optimal. Is it me or the trail? Am I trying too hard to control the outcome, choosing what feels easy (to me) to gently push my partners – my dog, my daughter, my friend – into more mileage than they’re ready for?

The Essence of Control

When you think of control, what comes to mind? The vanilla definition of control is “the power to influence or direct people’s behavior or the course of events.” Many of my clients mention feeling “out of control” around food, or not being able to exercise because of “situations beyond their control.” What makes you lose control?

We have no control over how our hiking partners do, but we can help them develop the right skills such as pacing, fueling, hydration, gear selection, and more, to improve their outcomes.

Now it’s your turn to explore your ideas and feelings about control. Please jot down some notes for the following questions:

The Illusion of Control

Reflect on a moment when you felt completely in control. What elements were actually under your control, and what elements were not? Precision Nutrition has a worksheet called the Spheres of Control that might help you explore what areas of your life you have control over and which you don’t.

Trilliums are starting to bloom in the mountains! A sure sign of spring. We have zero control over the weather, but 100% control over where we choose to live.

Surrender Control

Think about a time you had no choice but to surrender control. How did it make you feel, and what was the outcome? Did other people around you seem to have control, and if so, over what? What did you learn from the experience? If you had to do it again, what would you do differently?

Surrender Control in Physical Challenges

In February of 2024, I shared a post on process and outcome goals. In physical challenges, an outcome goal might be “summit Mt. Rainier” over which we have little control. A process goal might include “carry a pack with increasing weight over increasing distance and elevation gain weekly” over which we have more control.

When you consider physical challenges like a hike, you can’t control the weather, but you can control the route you choose. You can control who you hike with, but not how they do.

I think I have voice control over Ajax, but that is an illusion. What we have is a bonded trust that comes from 7 years of hiking together. He loves to hike with me; he also loves being off-leash. He knows he will lose that freedom if he goes too far away from me. — I think I have voice control over Ajax, but that is an illusion. What we have is a bonded trust that comes from 7 years of hiking together. He loves to hike with me. But he also loves being off-leash. He knows he will lose that freedom if he goes too far away from me.

The Body’s Limits and the Mind’s Role

Now it’s your turn. Recall a physically challenging experience. This might include facing a goal that pushed you past previous limits. Getting a physical diagnosis that shocked you into changing your actions. Recovering from an injury or illness that required a lot from you both physically and mentally.

Did you listen to your body’s signals, or did your mind push you to ignore them? What might that say about your relationship with control? Use the Sphere of Control exercise if it helps.

I often surrender control over timing Ajax's breaks. Here he supplies himself with a drink of water when he's thirsty. — I often surrender control over timing Ajax’s breaks. Here he supplies himself with a drink of water when he’s thirsty.

Preparation vs. Adaptation

Consider how preparation for an event (like training for a mountain climb, hike, or triathlon) differs from adapting in the moment. Which do you lean towards, and how does that affect your sense of control? If you have a physical goal in mind, how much of your preparation relies on gaining skills? on creating consistent habits that will help you get ready?

How much depends on luck and “winging it?” What would it feel like to surrender control over some aspect of preparation for a physical goal?

Ajax and C. cross one of several boardwalks through the Shy Bear Pass loop on Cougar Mountain.

Surrender Control in Relationships

The last two aspects of control include supporting others and impact on well-being.

Supporting vs. Controlling

One of the trickiest parts about being a coach rather than a personal trainer is to surrender control to the client. For 25 years as a personal trainer, I got used to asking for two more repetitions or telling clients what exercise they would do next. A good coach, on the other hand, remains client-centered and asks what the client feels they need.

Personal trainers control the environment, the workout, and in that regard, the outcome. Coaches are collaborators, equal partners, and guides. As I grapple with evolving into a 100% coach, that line blurs when I need to hold firm.

Fern-covered boulder, an erratic from the glacier age?

Reflect on a time when you had to support someone else through a challenge. How did you balance offering support without taking control away from them? What might you do differently to surrender control that isn’t yours in the first place?

The Role of Control in Wellness

This morning I have a medical appointment I’ve been nervous about for a few days. I have no control over the outcome of the tests. But I do have control over two things: my reaction and the actions I take beyond today.

I have overcome every physical challenge I’ve faced in the past fifty years, including natural childbirth, healing broken bones, removing unhealthy addictive behaviors, and coping with unexpected health diagnoses. Whatever new information I learn, I know I will continue to make the best choices possible.

A selfie with my best hiking pal, Ajax, near the junction at Whittaker Wilderness Peak.

Your turn. How does your desire for control impact your wellness journey? Does it stress you out? Could you surrender control to lead to greater well-being?

Take-Aways about Control

This week I’ve continued to rewrite my control stories. My hiking partner hiked solo this week, reclaiming her power and succeeding on a trail that challenged her a few months ago. By being willing to teach her, I’m also learning from her.

By focusing on controlling the actions we take (our process goals), we can influence our outcomes. We can’t control others’ performance, but we can support them so they have a more comfortable experience. Likewise, we can’t control how our bodies do on a given day, but we can acquire skills around proper hydration, physical training, gear selection, fueling, recovery, and pacing to enhance the outcome.

Skunk Cabbage is blooming on Cougar Mountain.

Feel free to explore your reactions to these prompts in your journaling or reflection practice and share any insights in the comments so that we can all benefit, learn, and grow.

Featured

How to Celebrate Milestones in Unconventional Ways

In November, I shared ten non-food, non-cost celebrations anyone can do to mark important achievements. This week I thought again about how people celebrate and how personal such time markers are. Last week I reached a huge milestone. It involved completing fifty structured coaching sessions following certain guidelines. It moves me one step closer to becoming a nationally recognized, board-certified health and wellness coach (NBC-HWC) with only a 5-hour exam in July remaining between me and the new credential. To celebrate, I headed for the mountains with my dog. How do you celebrate milestones?

Abundant flowing water at Exit 47 on the path to Pratt Lake. Alpine trails in March look far different than they do in October!

Destination: Pratt Lake Trail

The last time I’d hiked this particular segment of the trail at Exit 47 off I-90 was in October 2021. 18 months earlier I almost injured myself during a solo hike with Ajax to Pratt and Tuscahootchie Lake. This time, I knew we’d find snow since my daughter and I visited Olallie and Talapus Lakes the week before (accessible from both Exit 45 and Exit 47). This time, my goal was Rainbow/Island Lakes (11.7 miles/3000′ gain) west of the junction that leads north to Pratt Lake. Barring that, we could try Pratt Lake (11 miles / 2300′ gain). So many possibilities!

The parallel was not lost on me. As I get closer to earning my NBHWC credential, I feel like endless possibilities are opening to me. More confidence as a coach. More clout when talking with people who might want me to coach health and wellness groups. The more skills and knowledge I acquire, the better a resource I am for my existing clients, some of whom have been with me for over a decade.

I go all out to celebrate milestones. Usually in the mountains. Tree branches bowing under the weight of new-fallen snow that all but covered the trail ahead of us. There must have been at least 4-6 inches of undisturbed new snow overnight.

This adventure was to celebrate milestones — not only what I’ve accomplished over the past year toward launching and building Thrive Clues, but also how far I’ve come in the past twenty-five years as co-owner of Body Results.

Breaking Trail

On March 28th we started our hike around 6:45 a.m., the only car parked in the lot. As we continued past the sign at .9 miles marking the Pratt Lake/Granite Mountain junction, which Ajax and I visited last October, I felt like I was returning home. The area around Exit 47 is my favorite because of the large number of accessible Alpine Lakes. No two hikes are ever the same.

I eagerly anticipated finding snow around the next bend, and the next, but we traveled at least two miles before reaching a dusting in the underbrush. At several fast-flowing streams, I pulled out my new Trail Buddy aluminum cork trekking poles to give me more confidence in my footing.

When Ajax struggled in deep snow causing him to posthole up to his belly, I knew it was time for snowshoes.

By the time we reached the Pratt-Olallie junction, we tromped through several inches of new snow. It got progressively deeper as we headed toward Pratt Lake. By the time Ajax reached snow up to his belly, I knew it was time for me to put on my MSR snowshoes and break trail.

Decision Time

My spirits soared as I trusted my route-finding skills through the snow-draped forest. Ajax knows the trail almost as well as I do, but he’s so low to the ground that I wonder whether he trusts his nose or if he looks for the “path of least resistance” that is slightly lower than the rest of the surroundings. When did the last travelers come through here?

I kept glancing behind me to make sure Ajax was with me. He followed directly behind in my snowshoe tracks. At last, I heard what I refer to as the “highest falls.” It’s a fast-running stream, the last flowing water before the overlook for Mt. Rainier and Olallie Lake and the junction between Pratt and Rainbow/Island Lakes.

When we reached the stream, a faint depression on the opposite side indicated where someone had previously traveled. However, the slope beneath me was buried and slick. Snow-covered rocks across the stream would be treacherous if I took my snowshoes off, but I couldn’t navigate the slope with them on.

What about Ajax? Without me breaking trail, he’d be standing in freezing water waiting for me. At that moment, I knew that without anyone else on the trail, we couldn’t take any unnecessary risks.

Celebrate Milestones with Plan C: Olallie Lake

I quickly came up with plan C: we’d visit Olallie Lake from the west instead of the east, as we’d done the previous week. It would still give us some new trail and a narrow log bridge to cross. But I felt sure Ajax could handle it. We turned around and retraced our snowshoe tracks toward Olallie Lake.

At the narrow log bridge that has turned me around twice before with multiple hiking partners, this time I knew what would help. I called Ajax to me and put his leash on, then followed him across the bridge. Sometimes he reminds me of a mountain goat.

Ajax scouting out the narrow log bridge. He turned around when I got his harness out and allowed me to attach it for safety.

The only tracks we found on our trip to Olallie Lake were a pair of microspikes on boots that someone must have made from Exit 45 not long before we arrived. We had the lake to ourselves. Greg, the snowman I built the previous week, was only a small mound of snow. After a snack and some water, we tried to walk around the lake but soon decided we’d be better off on the flat ground of the frozen lake itself.

Celebrate Milestones: Last Try

On our “celebrate milestones” adventure, I’d set my turn-around time as 11:30. We still had over an hour to play. Maybe we could go back to the “highest falls” to scout the stream for a way across. If nothing else, I’d shoot some more photos of the stunning landscape.

As we started up the Pratt trail a second time, I noticed my left foot was slipping around. I glanced down. Two of the straps were missing! Likewise on my right, one of the midfoot straps had snapped off. The 25-year-old straps had grown so brittle over the years, and in the cold, that they’d broken in two.

Author selfie at the"first falls" along the Pratt-Olallie trail, just about a half mile beyond the junction with the Granite Mountain trail. — Author selfie at the”first falls” along the Pratt-Olallie trail, just about a half mile beyond the junction with the Granite Mountain trail.

Gear malfunction made our decision easy: we turned around and headed for the car where, once again, I was delighted and surprised to find nobody else in the lot. We’d made a good call. I’d order new buckles and try again. On the hike out, I ran through my list of gratitudes, thanking the snow, the trail, my dog, and the snowshoes that got me as far as they did. What a great day to be alive and appreciative of the joy Mother Nature always provides.

Take-Away Lessons

What are some non-cost, non-food ways for you to celebrate milestones? My way might not be something you would enjoy. Your treats will be just as unique and unconventional for you.

In the words of Marie Kondo, what sparks joy for you? Perhaps you like to dance. Why not take a short dance party break to a favorite song? Call a friend you haven’t talked to in a while to share your good news. Take a stroll in your favorite neighborhood to collect wildflowers. Attend a “free museum day” exhibit you’ve been wanting to see.

Peace, serenity, solitude, and nature's beauty are among the top qualities I look for in a celebration. — Peace, serenity, solitude, and nature’s beauty are among the top qualities I look for in a celebration.

Celebrate milestones in a way that makes them meaningful to you. If you go from one milestone to the next without a pause to appreciate how far you’ve come, you’ll exhaust yourself. Today I celebrate my new clients. My health. Completion of one task and start of the next. Share how you celebrate milestones so we can all learn and grow.

Featured

Changing Seasons: How to Adapt on the Trails

In this week’s blog post, I contrast two recent hikes while reflecting on how the changing seasons mirror our personal growth. The first, a five-hour ramble around the summits of West Tiger Mountain, included dirt paths, songs from 18 bird species, and running streams. Familiar, as I historically am a fair-weather, 3-season hiker. On the second, my daughter joined Ajax and me for a lovely snowy visit to Olallie and Talapus Lakes. The changing seasons in the mountains provide valuable metaphors for personal adaptation and stretching outside our comfort zone to find the zest and thrills that make life worth living.

My daughter joined me and Ajax for my usual Tuesday Morning outing, a trip to Talapus and Olallie Lakes near Exit 45 off I-90 in the Cascade Mountains.

Changing Seasons, Changing Landscapes

In spring, everything in the mountains changes. Birds grace us with their songs from March to May. Lakes and streams melt, creating beautiful rushing waterfalls. Greenery bursts with early blooms. Footing evolves from the interesting and ever-changing hard-packed snow to mud and, as things eventually dry, predictable dusty trails.

And people come out in droves. When I finished my early morning St. Patrick’s Day hike on Tiger Mountain, the parking lot was packed by noon. Four cars lined up behind me, waiting to take my space. Parked cars lined the access road clear down to Frontage Road. Fortunately, sticking to less popular trails ensured a hike relatively free from people.

By contrast, on Tuesday we were the first to arrive at the trailhead for Talapus and Olallie Lakes at 9 a.m. Even at 2 when we returned to our car, there were only a couple handfuls of cars. Same lovely weather but on a weekday. Farther from the city. And in snow. Could more visits to snowy trails be the answer to enjoying the mountains without tons of people? And why is that?

My daughter and Ajax pause on the snowy trail to Olallie and Talapus Lakes on the cusp of the changing seasons.

Navigate Icy Paths and Enjoy the Winter Wonderland

In the snow, the solitude and silence were priceless. We encountered only 8 bird species compared to 20 two days earlier on Tiger. Even the air felt different. As we walked through the woods, icy pockets signaled nearby snow. How wondrous to transition onto hard-packed snow that muffled the sound around us.

On the trip out, I asked my daughter which she preferred: the same hike in the summer or this one in winter conditions. She likes Talapus Lake in the summer — if she can explore the logjam on the east end. But in the winter, when logs are covered in snow and more treacherous, she prefers Olallie Lake, with its easy access and interesting snow travel.

Each step brought us new challenges and mindfulness, whether the snow crunched underfoot and provided traction, or caused us to slip and slide. By the end of the hike, we were more savvy about picking which sections of snow would hold weight and what would lead to flailing. Obvious highlights included making snow angels, stomping a huge smile in the fresh white landscape, building a snowman named Greg, and walking across frozen Olallie Lake. Such wonderful solitude.

Ajax soaks up the sun while Brooke peers over snowman Greg's outstretched arm. The snowman only took about 15 minutes to build under near-perfect conditions. The arrival of spring reminds me of the changing seasons. — Ajax soaks up the sun while Brooke peers over snowman Greg’s outstretched arm. The snowman only took about 15 minutes to build under near-perfect conditions. The arrival of spring reminds me of the changing seasons.

Prepare and Adapt: Gear and Mindset

In addition to enjoying the changing landscape, we also selected different gear. Early spring snow conditions change rapidly, sometimes hour to hour. We brought ski poles, snowshoes, and microspikes in the car with us. But once I saw bare pavement and dirt trails at the trailhead, I left behind the bulkier, harder-to-carry snowshoes and ski poles. Instead, I brought both pairs of compact microspikes and one collapsible pole.

The only snow equipment we ended up using were gloves and the pole. The few other hikers we saw clipped on their traction devices, but we never needed ours. I prefer to carry something we might or might not use rather than suffering from not having it. Proper gear choice speaks to two things: experience and preparation. In the metaphor of life’s unpredictable challenges, the more experience we have and the more prepared we are to face whatever comes next, the better we can handle it.

You can take the hiker out of the mountains, but you can never take the mountains out of the hiker. Whether snow or dirt, I feel completely in my element, at peace and connected when I'm out enjoying nature. One of our favorite trees on the Talapus-Olallie Lakes trail. — You can take the hiker out of the mountains, but you can never take the mountains out of the hiker. Whether snow or dirt, I feel completely in my element, at peace and connected when I’m out enjoying nature. One of our favorite trees on the Talapus-Olallie Lakes trail.

Personal Growth Parallels Life’s Changing Seasons

Like changing seasons in the mountains, we experience inevitable changes in our own lives. When my daughter was much younger, just as we started getting comfortable with a life stage… everything changed. The terrible twos. Her first solo gymnastics class. Kindergarten. First friendships. Junior high. Her constant growth forced us to adapt, like it or not. Parenting builds resilience and adaptability. So do injury, illness, changes in homes or jobs, and adversity.

Each of my clients comes to me facing profound change. If we can prepare for the unexpected and face challenges head-on, we can appreciate our journey and the lessons it can teach us. This week I spoke with a client who recently reached the summit of Kilimanjaro. She became a magnet of optimism for the others on her 20-person team who needed a pep talk. She enjoyed each of the diverse experiences during the journey to the top as much as she did the summit.

This winter we didn't get much in the way of snow in the city. So we drove to it to make snow angels, a snowman, and throw a few snowballs. Ajax investigated my daughter's angel. — This winter we didn’t get much in the way of snow in the city. So we drove to it to make snow angels, a snowman, and throw a few snowballs. Ajax investigated my daughter’s angel.

Experiencing a Shift

As I created this post, I felt a shift within. Making the time to drive a greater distance with my daughter to reach the snow made me relish and yearn for snow experiences even more. It helped me embrace and celebrate both my Milwaukee roots and over two decades of Alpine travel. And, as a bonus, Ajax tolerated the snow just fine.

I don’t have any big physical objectives this year. My mantra for 2024 is to “turn obstacles into opportunities.” Instead of viewing snow in the mountain as an obstacle that keeps me on trails at lower elevations, I’m heading higher starting in April. Ajax and I will enjoy the snow as much as we can. After all, the summer heat and crowded trails are just around the corner.

Featured

How to Make Change Stick: Client Questions Answered

We’re halfway through March Madness. I’ve set an intention to complete all of my practicum coaching sessions by March 31. The NBC-HWC (National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach) certification requires fifty before we can sit for the 5-hour final in July. My clients and I have had so much fun and success that I thought I would share some of their insights with you. The four questions featured below illustrate how to take specific, concrete, simple steps to make change stick. Each is representative of how I help people through my new coaching company, Thrive Clues.

One way I make change stick is to get out hiking with friends. Ajax and a hiking buddy on Mt. Washington. I may be headed back there on Tuesday.

Increase Satiation of Lunchtime Salads

One client wanted help to increase the satisfaction of her vegetarian salads at lunchtime. She was already doing several things right: pre-purchased packaged greens thrown together with protein. Simple, quick, and effective. But she always craved something sweet afterward, even though she was full. Perhaps you can relate. To make change stick, we needed to find an easy solution that was readily available.

I asked what her source of fat was. Bingo! We found the missing piece. We discussed how she could try adding a thumb-sized portion of avocado oil, olive oil, or half an avocado like the picture below.

Try adding avocado oil, olive oil, diced avocado, or guacamole to a salad to add sustenance and increase the satiation impact (make it more satisfying and last longer.)

A week later, she reported that she was astonished at how one simple change made the salad so much more satisfying. She felt sated longer so she ate less the rest of the day. She no longer overdid it on dessert. Win!

Do you have a tricky meal you’d like to overhaul? Send me an Email to set up a FREE 15-minute consultation to troubleshoot your problem.

Make Change Stick: Increase Autonomy In Hiking

Another client loves to hike, but it seems she does better when someone else sets up the destination and meeting times. She also likes having someone with her while she gains confidence and familiarity on new-to-her trails.

To increase her autonomy and self-sufficiency, we developed a new hiking plan. She would continue to hike with me every other week on new-to-her “stretch” trails, which would build her confidence. On the Tuesdays between our hikes, she would explore a trail on her own that we’d already done together.

Since she’d participated in five consecutive hikes, we talked about how she might increase her weekly exercise to support her new passion and make change stick. When she suggested walking four days a week, I gently reminded her that going from one day of exercise per week to five might feel overwhelming. We’re shooting for success, not shame, guilt, or blame. Going from one to two weekly workouts would feel more sustainable. It could help her build a new exercise habit that will stick.

What a difference a week makes. On March 5, Squak had several inches of snow at the summit. This bench had a warning sign on it.

One week later, on March 12, we had sun, hail, rain, and high winds. But the bench and snow were gone.

Nudge the Notch

By taking small steps, what I call “nudging the notch,” you can sneak up on your goals without pain, injury, overwhelm, or strain. She finally agreed to add just one thing. After reviewing how to set SMART goals, she decided to add a weekly walk between hikes.

Are you having difficulty figuring out how to set up your hiking training? Send me an Email to set up a FREE 15-minute consultation to troubleshoot.

Add Protein to Breakfast

What if you have four habits you want to incorporate, today? At Thrive Clues we use Precision Nutrition principles of identifying the “low-hanging fruit” or the “big rocks,” meaning those habits that are easiest to change or make the biggest impact.

One of my long-term clients wanted to investigate eating more vegetables, controlling portion size, adding healthy fats, and getting a better handle on breakfasts. All are great habits, at the right time. When I challenged her for the next week to start with one thing, she chose to focus on breakfast. Once she proves she can make change stick around breakfast protein, she can go on to others.

It is not unusual for me to have veggies and lean pork for breakfast. Who says we can't? — It is not unusual for me to have veggies and lean pork for breakfast. Who says we can’t?

Breakfast Defined

For many people, “breakfast” means either sausage, bacon, eggs (high fat and cholesterol) or pancakes, donuts, waffles, or pastries (high fat, sugar, and gluten) or perhaps cereal with milk or yogurt (processed foods). Breakfast is literally whatever food we use to “break our fast.”

We discussed what her current morning meal looks like and what her ideal might be. When she asked me what I eat for the first meal of the day, I said I start with protein which often means leftovers from the night before. Homemade pad Thai, ground chicken with half a Japanese sweet potato, and pulled pork and veggies don’t sound like “breakfast foods” to most people. Why not?

A sample breakfast: 2 slices of melon, half a Sumo orange, a healthy dollop of guacamole, 3 strips of lean bacon, and two small gluten-free rice flour tortillas. All homemade. All delicious. And decaffeinated Market Spice tea. — I quit eating cereal years ago. A common breakfast: 2 melon balls, half a Sumo orange, a healthy dollop of guacamole, 3 strips of lean bacon, and two small gluten-free rice flour tortillas. And decaffeinated Market Spice tea. All homemade. All delicious.

General Mills, Kellogg’s, and other producers of cereal know exactly how to make palatable, highly addictive foods. Psst – sugar! Take a look at your labels. I challenge you to find a tasty cereal that has under 6 grams of sugar per serving. They don’t exist. Those that do taste a little like twigs and bark.

What Protein Do You Like?

Instead, I invited her to think WAY outside the box to find what proteins she likes. Could you make a morning meal around salmon and eggs? What about a chicken thigh with a little rice and guacamole? A lean burger patty could be very tasty any time of day. And don’t forget protein shakes for those rushed mornings when you want something easy that will support you. The first step is to rewrite old scripts.

Would you like to discuss redefining your meals so that you get away from old habits that no longer serve you? Send me an Email to set up a FREE 15-minute consultation.

Make Change Stick: Reframe Exercise as Movement

The most common conversation with clients I’ve had the past two weeks has been to reframe exercise as moving the body. Anything other than sitting on the couch or lying down counts. How relieved people are when I say they don’t have to go to the gym for an hour-long sweaty sufferfest. Nor do they have to endure mind-numbing time on the “dreadmill”. Some of my conversations revealed that clients are a lot closer than they thought to the national recommendations for movement.

One of the questions I ask my coaching clients is to think about activities they've enjoyed in the past. SCUBA? Zumba? Biking? Golf? Anything is fair game. By choosing things you ENJOY you're far more likely to stick with them. — One of the questions I ask my coaching clients is to think about activities they’ve enjoyed in the past. SCUBA? Zumba? Biking? Golf? Anything is fair game. By choosing things you ENJOY you’re far more likely to stick with them.

National Guidelines

The US Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) recommends the following Physical Activity Guidelines for Americans. It’s a 118-page PDF document so I’ll summarize. All adults (with modifications for age/abilities) should aim to get the following movement per week:

AT LEAST 150 minutes of moderate-intensity movement — anything that gets the heart beating faster. This could be dancing. Walking a dog. Caring for horses. Carrying golf equipment for 18 holes. Pickleball.
Or, if not point one, AT LEAST 75 minutes of high-intensity movement. Jogging. Swimming laps. Vigorous bike riding. Cross-country skiing. Hiking with a pack. Boxing intervals that leave you breathless.
AT LEAST 2 strength training workouts per week that involve all the major muscles in the body.
For seniors, including balance training is also important.
There are additional benefits to doing more than 300 minutes of movement per week.

Icicles forming at the bottom of a log on Squak Mountain ten days ago. If you can walk, you can hike. Why not explore the wonderful world around us on foot? — Icicles formed at the bottom of a log on Squak Mountain ten days ago. If you can walk, you can hike. Why not explore the wonderful world around us on foot?

How do you stack up? Are you getting close to the national movement guidelines when you look at what you do in a week? If not, how might you get more strength training or aerobic movement? What do you need to do to make change stick?

If you are struggling to find enjoyable ways to move your body, send me an Email to set up a FREE 15-minute consultation. Let’s get you on the path toward making change stick.

Featured

Abundance: How to Identify and Appreciate It Now

Two years ago after breaking my wrist, I wrote about abundance and joy in a blog post featuring Ingrid Fetell Lee’s book, Joyful: The Surprising Power of Ordinary Things to Create Extraordinary Happiness. Last week, I visited my family in North Carolina which led to discussing inspiration. This week’s reflection follows from taking a course about cultivating an abundance mindset. What can you do to identify and appreciate your abundance?

One of the many things I appreciate this year is having an abundance of opportunities on Tuesday mornings to enjoy nature. Last week the new snowfall created childlike wonder and joy at the beauty surrounding me. Bullitt's Fireplace near Central Peak on Squak Mountain. — One of the many things I appreciate this year is having an abundance of opportunities on Tuesday mornings to enjoy nature. Last week, the new snowfall created childlike wonder and joy at the beauty surrounding me. Bullitt’s Fireplace near Central Peak on Squak Mountain.

Joy, Enough, Inspiration, Change

In previous posts, I’ve explored the themes of joy, enough, inspiration, and change. Since I have not yet figured out how to create a custom-search feature on my blog, I took the liberty of sharing the first three links for each major topic for your ease in accessing them.

On Joy: How to Hold Your Own Joy Treasure Hunt; Slow Down to Find Joy In Simple Pleasures; and Forest Bathing: How To Get Started, among others.

On Enough: I Am Enough: Acrostic Poems about Change and Growth; Keep it Simple and Good Enough in your 2022 Goals; and How to Rewrite the Rules at Peek-a-Boo Lake, among others.

On Inspiration: Inspiration is Everywhere When You Look For It; Inspiration from Life and Literature on Managing Pain; and Finding Inspiration in Life and Graphic Novels, among others.

On Change: Discipline Equals Freedom: How to Dive Deep into Change; Ripple Effect: How Tiny Changes Make a Powerful Impact; and Five Stages of Change: Am I In The Preparation Phase along with a whopping 93 other posts that include “change.”

That’s an abundance of advice. And only one of the many areas where I currently notice and feel such wealth.

Abundance of space and solitude. I encountered very few people on Squak the day after a fresh snowfall. These two hikers came up from a different path and sat enjoying hot beverages at Bullitt Fireplace when Ajax and I continued to Central Peak. — Abundance of space and solitude. I encountered very few people on Squak the day after a fresh snowfall. These two hiked a different path and enjoyed hot beverages at Bullitt Fireplace as Ajax and I continued to Central Peak.

What Is Abundance?

What comes to mind when you hear the word abundance? Shoes? Debt? Free time? Opportunities? Problems? Money? Do you feel a lack or a lot in your life?

You can have abundance anywhere, not just in material wealth. Think about personal growth, close relationships, and your creative and lifetime experiences. For this article to be effective, before continuing, please pause, pull out some paper and a pen, or open a blank page on your computer.

For one minute, first define what abundance means to you. What emotions come up? What desires?

Now take a few minutes to jot down 5-6 areas where you currently feel you have abundance.

Walking in a Winter Wonderland, Let It Snow, and Let It Go are three songs my mind goes to whenever there is fresh snow. I have an abundance of mental music to draw on; my mind is like a perpetual DJ playing whatever song I want. — Walking in a Winter Wonderland, Let It Snow, and Let It Go are three songs I replay whenever I encounter fresh snow. I have an abundance of mental music to draw on; my mind is like a perpetual DJ playing whatever song I want.

Finally, take another 2-3 minutes to write down where you would like more abundance. These will be helpful in a few journal prompts coming up in this post.

Abundance, Scarcity, and Should Defined

Abundance is defined as “a large quantity; ample, copious, plenty.” Some go so far as to add “more than you need.” Tama Kieves’ 30-day Moneyshift program introduces the concept in the context of personal well-being and fulfillment rather than monetary or material acquisitions.

Scarcity, on the other hand, is the opposite. In economic terms, it means demands outweigh the supply. Here I’m using “scarcity” in terms of our mindset. Do you find yourself using the phrases “never enough”, “must do,” or “should“? What would it feel like to replace those phrases with “more than enough,” “choose to do,” and “choice”? What would it take for you to shift to an abundance mindset?

One step you can take to appreciate your abundance is to pay attention to what brings you joy. Where do you have abundance already? Where would you like more?

If one of my clients is using a lot of “shoulds” and “have tos,” I introduce the following exercise to bring their attention to it.

Stop Shoulding All Over Yourself

Take out a piece of paper and write in huge block letters the word “SHOULD.” If you use HAVE TO, NEED TO, GOTTA, MUST – these are all of the “should” variety. Write them down.

Now, take paints, colored pencils, markers, or ink pens and scribble all over your chosen word. No more shoulding on yourself! Instead, start noticing whenever you use that word. Who says? What is the voice making you feel like you have to do something? What would happen if you never did?

Now, think about what it would feel like to stop, reflect for a moment, and replace SHOULD with CHOOSE. If you’re like me, the pressure dissipates. There’s more freedom and joy. The only things we all must do is die and pay taxes. Everything else is our choice.

Try This: Find Abundance In Your Life

To find your next step in cultivating a new mindset, take some time to identify where you already have plenty in your life. Below are 3 journaling prompts. Spend a few minutes on each one. Then, reread what you wrote and write for another minute. In journaling terminology, this is called a “reflection.” Doing so will help you gain more clarity and solidify the idea in your mind. Share it in the comments, if you like.

Overcome Scarcity

Reflect on a recent situation where you felt a sense of scarcity or lack. What EXACTLY triggered these feelings? The more specific you can get, the more it can teach you.

Now, rewrite the scenario from an abundance mindset, focusing on the resources and options you have available. How does it feel to approach it from a different mindset? The more you do this, the more you teach your mind that there is another way to think.

Abundance in the Everyday

Identify and write about moments in your day when you experienced joy, connection, or satisfaction. Perhaps you already did this as an earlier exercise. If not, try it now.

Can you identify abundance in those moments?

How can recognizing these moments more often shift your perspective toward a new mindset?

Abundance vs. Scarcity Mindset

Think of an area in your life where you frequently feel scarcity. Now, list five abundant resources (such as emotional, knowledge, social, financial, etc.) that you already have in your life that you could apply to this area.

How does focusing on these resources change your perspective?

My hiking buddy Ajax investigates a snow-laden branch.

Your Turn: Take Action

To help change anything, including a mindset, it is necessary to take action. Here are some possible steps. Pick one to play with for the next few weeks and see what happens. Then experiment with another. And if you come up with an action item not mentioned, please share it in the comments so we can all grow together.

Try new experiences to expand your sense of possibility and joy.
Look for occasions when you are viewing life through a scarcity lens and see if there is an opportunity for personal growth and greater satisfaction by viewing it through the lens of abundance.
Embrace all of the choices and opportunities around you.
Practice gratitude daily. How many can you write down? The more you see them, the more you attract.
Set intentions that align with your values and abundance.
Invest in relationships and community as sources of enrichment.

According to my spiritual coach, Tama Kieves, who has taught principles of A Course In Miracles for over 30 years, by focusing on all the areas where you already have abundance, you will attract more abundance. Focus on scarcity will create more lack. But abundance creates more abundance.

Abundant peace on a trail where ours were the first tracks of the day. A hiker and her dog. And solitude all around.

Featured

Inspiration is Everywhere When You Look For It

I just returned from a wonderful week-long visit with my parents and youngest brother in Asheville, NC. Part of my intention was to help in whatever way I could. In doing so, I discovered that by helping them, I helped myself even more. I left Thursday feeling well-rested, hopeful, and inspired. Inspiration is everywhere when you look for it.

The north end of beautiful Beaver Lake in North Asheville, a place I visited three times during my visit to walk and bird.

Everyday Inspiration Surrounds Us

We get in such deep ruts in our lives, chasing deadlines and digging out from mountains of to-do’s, that sometimes it takes a complete change of surroundings to see things differently. I came away with a deep appreciation for the tiny, everyday things that supply inspiration.

By the time my brother arrived Sunday afternoon, I felt rested and ready to begin a few house projects my parents had ready for us. Their tidy house and manicured lawn stayed that way the whole visit, inspiring me to tackle my own home this year.

Even raking leaves in February, browsing at local shops, or spending time watching pups frolic at a dog park can provide ample sources of inspiration. The magnets on the left were from Diamond Brand Outdoors in downtown Asheville close to a restaurant called The Blackbird Restaurant where 107 blackbirds grace one long wall and a mural of blackbirds covers another.

Worth a few chuckles and shares on my blog.

A wonderful reminder to myself of my 2024 intention to shift my mindset.

Tiny Daily Examples That Made Me Smile

At every turn, this trip reminded me of several guideposts for an enjoyable life:

Try something new every day. My father has a “penny jar” where he puts in a penny every time he tries something new, proving you’re never too old to explore, learn, or grow
Seek wonder around you through all five senses. Grace Coddington got it partially right with, “Always keep your eyes open. Keep watching. Because whatever you see can inspire you.” I’d use “Sense” instead of see. Birdsong, pungent flowers or savory food smells, soft fur or wet grass underfoot, and delicious foods can also create inspiration.
Be amazed by the simple things. If you’re acting in Zombie mode, simply going through life by rote, perhaps it’s time to make some shifts so you can better appreciate the life you’re living.

Homecooked brunch of leftovers. I’ll take this over restaurant food any day of the week.

Pay attention to what makes you smile. Funny magnets. Hearing a wild turkey gobbling at dawn — after trying to find one three mornings in a row. Creating a smiley face in a flatbed of birdseed. Trying to figure out how to open the door to a Tesla vehicle. Finding “You are enough” and “You matter” cards on my morning puzzle or near my water bottle.

Musical Inspiration

Three musical moments stood out that I might not have paid attention to if not for reflecting on inspiration.

My mother invited me to attend a low-enrollment, in-person Zumba class on Tuesday. This would be a great opportunity for me to point out anything I saw that might help her get more from the class. I found myself participating fully in the back of the room, smiling through most of it simply because… I loved the music. It had been over a decade since I’d attended organized fitness classes. I was surprised to find out how much I miss it.

My parents inspire me. Nearly 60 years together and while they both do things that irritate each other – such is life – their bond is stronger than ever. Dinner at Zen Sushi, a new-to-us-all dine-in experience.

Another unexpected source of inspiration was watching the jukebox musical romcom movie, Mamma Mia, with my parents. This is rare as my father tires more easily these days and likes to retire early. But he stayed up well past his bedtime so we could watch as a family. For days after, we would break into songs or try to remember what scene went with which music. My favorites? The Winner Takes it All, Mamma Mia, and the opening musical score. Can you say chair dance?

Finally, I delighted in grabbing several moments to play piano on the instrument I grew up with. My mother had it tuned before this visit, and while it felt different from mine, it still felt great to play. The takeaway is continuing to enjoy music daily, such as playing piano and flute duets with my daughter.

Extraordinary Inspiration in Unexpected Places

I returned home late Thursday evening. Friday morning, I found another source of inspiration. A client I’ve been working with for a year arrived for his weekly personal training workout with me.

This amazing gentleman kicked off his day at 7:45 with an hour of balance, strength, mobility, and flexibility training with me. He then rattled off that he was to have an hour of bodywork, some singles tennis, and an afternoon of cross-country skiing.

You’d never, ever guess that he’s 94. May we all be as resilient, capable, and fortunate as he is. He’s one of my real-life heroes.

Community and Collectives

Two additional sources of inspiration come from the local community.

My Monday Morning critique group consists of six women who might someday dub themselves the “Dig Deeper Dames.” We have been writing together for over ten years. Since January 2014 we have shared our lives, fears, and struggles. Each person brings decades of experience and a unique perspective to share with each other. Those ladies inspire me every week.

A rock garden on one of my walks at Beaver Lake provided a source of inspiration: a heart rock for my mother’s collection and a Beaver Lake memento as a reminder of my birding outings.

I also gain inspiration from clients who trust me with their daily battles and setbacks. It takes real courage to open up and share fears, failures, setbacks, and worries. When clients do so, they help make me a better person, a more competent coach, and a light or beacon of hope to everyone I come in contact with.

Your Turn to Be Inspired

Now it’s your turn. I’ve shared where my sources of inspiration came from this past week. Delicious food. Bird walks at Beaver Lake. Riding in a Tesla. Generosity from my youngest brother. Compassion for one another. Accomplishments of clients. Music and moments of reflection.

If you’ve never experienced a Tesla, do so. It’s worth trying at least once. My brother is very courageous!

Inspiration is everywhere if we open our hearts, minds, and senses to discovering it. Where do you find inspiration? What helps you to grow and transform? Please share your experiences of finding inspiration in unexpected places or within your community so we can all be inspired.

Featured

How To Focus on Process Goals While Hiking Margaret’s Way

On this week’s hike along Margaret’s Way on Squak Mountain, my hiking buddy and I discussed goals. I described the difference between process goals and outcome goals. If you have a particular goal that you never quite seem to reach, it could be that focusing on process goals could better serve you. Let’s take a closer look.

Starting up the trail toward Margaret's Way on Squak. We had an opportunity to discuss process goals and outcome goals. — Starting up the trail toward Margaret’s Way on Squak. We discussed process goals and outcome goals.

Intentions Links

One important note before I dive in: If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you may know that I prefer to write about “intentions” rather than “goals”. To me, the word has a kinder, gentler, less guilt-provoking feeling to it. Less emotional baggage. Here are several posts on setting intentions from the past year that you might find helpful.

How To Set Intentions for the New Year January 2023

Mt. Washington: How To Set Intentions May 2023

Murky Middle: How to Follow Through on Intentions June 2023

How to Grow a Hiking Practice on Squak Mountain January 2024

A break in the clouds cast Ajax's shadow as we returned to a viewpoint along Margaret's Way. — A break in the clouds cast Ajax’s shadow as we returned to a viewpoint along Margaret’s Way.

Process Goals vs. Outcome Goals

Whether you use “intention” or “goal” the result is similar. Onward. Outcome goals are those results you’re striving for, like finding a life partner, landing a dream job, or publishing a book. Focusing solely on outcome goals can cause anxiety, lack of control, and demotivation if they seem impossible to reach. What’s more, outcome goals often neglect the journey and can lead to dissatisfaction regardless of your achievement.

Process goals, on the other hand, are the bite-sized actions you take consistently that are directed toward your goal. Focusing on process goals leads to increased motivation, a greater sense of accomplishment, and empowerment. Stringing small successes together leads to positive momentum and helps you get unstuck.

The three outcome goals I will use to illustrate how process goals work are the following:

Reaching a certain weight
Climbing X mountain
Being happier

Ajax looks back as if to ask, "Which way, Mama, Bullitt's Fireplace or Debbie's View?" — Ajax looks back as if to ask, “Which way, Mama, Bullitt’s Fireplace or Debbie’s View?”

Keep in Mind SMART Goals

Whether you embrace process goals or outcome goals, make sure each of your goals is a SMART goal. Make each goal specific, measurable, action-oriented, realistic, and time-stamped.

Having a clear outcome goal is like knowing the endpoint, your destination on a map. But even airline pilots are off-course the majority of the time. Their process goals keep them on track so they arrive at the right airport.

It is far easier — not to mention more self-loving — to focus on what we can control than to worry about those we cannot. We have zero control over the weather, other people’s opinions or comments, or politics. But we can control where we choose to live and visit, what we make other’s thoughts mean to us, and what news station we listen to.

THINK ABOUT THIS:

Discover your underlying WHY. What would accomplishing your goal get you or do for you?
How would your life be different if you reached your goal? If you know you run on adrenaline and want to climb Mt. Rainier purely for the thrill of it, will that be enough, or will it just be one in a series of conquests?
What are you really seeking, and why?

Beautiful ferns grace the trunk of this tree.

Process Goals for Reaching X Weight

Imagine that your goal is to lose 20 pounds in three months by sticking to your exercise and eating plan. While it is specific, measurable, action-oriented, realistic, and time-stamped, it is still a little nebulous. The uncertainty comes from “exercise and eating plan.” We all know that moving more and eating less or better should take us to weight loss. But will your exercise and eating plan be the right one?

What if you focused, instead, on process goals? What do people at their setpoint weight do? A new process-goal plan might look something like this:

Drink a 10-ounce glass of water first thing in the morning, one with each of three meals, and one before bed. 50 ounces, tied to specific actions in the day so they’re easier to remember.
Move the body at least thirty minutes a day outside in whatever way brings me joy.
Eat a palm-sized portion of protein at every meal or snack opportunity.
Shut off electronics 45 minutes before bedtime and go to sleep at the same time each night.

Outcome goal: shoot a great photo of a gray owl. Process goals: watch birds twice a week; shoot a photo every day; carry binoculars on walks and practice spotting a bird before bringing binoculars to my eyes.

By nailing down the habits a healthy person has, and instilling action items specific to reaching that goal, you will feel better, maintain lean muscle mass, move more comfortably, alleviate stress, reset your Circadian rhythms, and direct yourself naturally and organically toward your outcome goal.

Process Goals for Climbing Mt. Rainier

If your goal is to climb Mt. Rainier, the outcome goal is reaching the summit and coming back down safely. What would the process goals look like?

Carry a pack weekly, increasing mileage, elevation gain, and pack weight no more than 10% per week
Twice a week, strengthen the legs, back, and core specific to carrying a heavy pack for three straight days over challenging terrain
Take a skills training course or find a professional to teach you about knots, rope handling, crampon use, and navigation
Practice fueling (protein and carbs 100 calories each) and hydrating (four ounces of water or electrolyte solution) every hour on conditioning hikes
Ask guides, your coach, or rangers about the best window of opportunity to climb to increase the chance of having favorable weather, then practice in all conditions so you’re ready for anything

You can see that the process goals above are completely within your control. See if you can think of five more process goals you might do to help increase the likelihood of reaching the outcome above.

Little Tahoma from Camp Schurman on Mt. Rainier. The shadow behind is Rainier's shadow. — Little Tahoma from Camp Schurman on Mt. Rainier. The shadow behind is Rainier’s shadow.

Process Goals for Being Happier

To come up with process goals for being happier, first, identify what brings you joy . Joyful Rejuvenation is one of the seven pillars of wellness I coach active, stressed women on at our new health and wellness company, Thrive Clues.

Please note that “being happier” is nebulous. Without more context, you could achieve it simply by finding a dollar bill on the ground. It is also highly individual and based on your values, personality, and identity.

While one person might define “happiness” as having material wealth and the ability to retire at age 50, someone else might define it as working until age 100 because they love it so much, as long as they can hike once a week with their dog.

Ajax and a sculpture of a canine relative at nearby Olympic Hills Elementary School.

Here are a few process goals for being happier that appear to be universal:

Have consistent, regular social contact with people who bring you joy and support you
Move the body at least 30 minutes a day in whatever activity brings you pleasure
Manage your stress by planning on doing something you enjoy daily

Final Thoughts

We learn best from each other’s experiences and our own mistakes. If you would like to share what has worked for you regarding process goals, please share in the comments below. A few parting thoughts:

Identify specific actions that are within your control.
Break down each goal into smaller, manageable tasks. This will enhance the clarity of what you’re going to do, when you will do it, and it will help you track your progress.
Enlist the help of an accountability partner, friend, or coach who will support your efforts.

Featured

How To Warm Up, Pace Yourself, and Hydrate While Hiking

Earlier this year, I introduced the idea of how to grow a hiking practice. While my hiking partner undergoes physical adaptations after only three hikes, I’m noticing subtle mental transformations which I’ll describe in my next post. Join me in learning how to warm up, pace yourself, and hydrate while hiking. We have also included a bonus one-minute video on how to perform the rest step for anyone traveling above 8,500′ elevation.

Tip 1: Let Your Body Warm Up

For our first hike to Tiger, I shared the Tradition Lake Loop with my partner. At 3 miles and 150′ of elevation gain, it’s a perfect test for someone who is returning to the mountains after an absence or for someone who wants to gain experience and confidence in wilderness exploration.

Question: My hiking partner asked me: Why are the first five minutes of every hike SO HARD?

Ajax and my hiking partner at the toppled bus on the Bus Route of Tiger Mountain.

Answer: it takes a few minutes for your body to warm up, especially if you’ve been sitting in a car for a while. As you would with any gym workout, prepare your body for exertion by easing into your pace. Many people plan a clothing break at about minute 15. Others strip a layer at the trailhead, knowing they’re going to warm up quickly.

During the first five minutes of any workout, your heart works harder to deliver blood and oxygen to the firing muscles. Once that flow is established, you should feel more comfortable. Runners call it “hitting their stride”. It’s similar for hiking.

TAKEAWAY: Be gentle with your body. Start a little slower than you normally would. Allow at least five minutes to get your body used to moving. You might even try walking around the parking lot for a few minutes before you put on your pack.

Tip 2: Pace Yourself

On our second hike, I decided to see how she handled some elevation. We headed up the West Tiger 3 trail toward the Talus Rock Trail, aiming for a 3.5-mile loop with 800 feet of elevation gain.

Question: What do you do if your body wants to start and stop all the time?

My hiking partner looks relieved to have finished most of the elevation gain. If you learn to pace yourself, you'll have a much more enjoyable time on the trail. — My hiking partner looks relieved to have finished most of the elevation gain. If you learn to pace yourself, you’ll have a much more enjoyable time on the trail.

Answer: Learn how to pace yourself. As soon as we shifted into traveling uphill she asked for a rest. Several minutes later she requested another. She asked why her thighs were burning. I explained that she was in her anaerobic zone, which couldn’t be sustained for longer than 1-2 minutes at a time.

Instead, we continued uphill at a slower pace that allowed her to travel without huffing and puffing. She sustained a more constant and comfortable rate without stopping every few minutes. A classic case of the tortoise beating the hare.

BONUS VIDEO: The Rest Step

Similarly, when climbers get above 8,500′ they often feel light-headed, dizzy, or nauseous. Using the rest step allows their legs to rest with each step so they, too, can keep going at a constant steady pace. Here is a brief video demonstrating this technique.

TAKEAWAY: Start-and-stop pacing is the quickest way to tire yourself out. I learned that the hard way on my first Rainier climb 30 years ago. Instead, find a pace that you can keep going for at least 30 minutes without stopping. That is your “endurance zone” pace for the day.

Ajax shuns the camera for this first Tiger Tuesdays group photo.

Tip 3: Hydrate

For week 3, we reversed the direction of our second hike. This time we warmed up on the Bus Trail, climbed the Section trail, and descended via the Nook Trail.

Question: How do you keep yourself from bonking on the trail?

Answer: If you start slow and pace yourself, another great strategy is to stay hydrated. On our first two hikes, my partner chose to drink in the car before and after the hike. On the third, I suggested she bring a water bottle so she could drink on the trail.

Ajax and I explored Tiger soon after a health scare in 2021. Nothing keeps me from the rejuvenating solace of the woods.

The result? Increased stamina and increased performance. Certainly, her body is adapting to the hiking after three weeks. But it also could more efficiently deliver blood and nutrients to the working muscles. In week four she’s going to bring a few snacks. As her body adapts to the distance, elevation, and in time, lightweight, she’ll see carryover into other realms of her life.

TAKEAWAY: Hydration and fuel are key to performance for any outing longer than about 90 minutes. If you feel like you “bonk” on the trail and you’re not carrying water or food, try it. You might see amazing results.

Featured

Overcome Overwhelm: How to Inch Forward

Last Monday I felt overwhelmed by a new health diagnosis. I sent my accountability partner one intention for the week: “To get by.” I cried. I journaled. And I reminded myself that this, too, shall pass, like every other physical challenge I’ve ever confronted. Three days later, I updated her with, “Still standing. Here are all the things I accomplished this week.” By removing every expectation except self-care, I was able to shrink the feeling of extreme stress. Doing so allowed me to inch forward until I felt closer to normal. Below are some strategies you can use to overcome overwhelm.

Feel like nothing is going to be left of you once you get out from under the weight of the world? Want to overcome overwhelm? There is hope.

What is Overwhelm?

Someone who is overwhelmed feels incapable of doing anything. They become “deer in the headlights.” Overwhelmed is the desire to bury your head in the sand. Draw the covers over your head and never come out. Watch silly cat videos because you have no bandwidth for anything harder. It comes from feeling like we have to do EVERYTHING. RIGHT NOW. PERFECTLY. Says who?

What if we gave up the need to control everything in our lives?

Brene Brown, researcher and author of many wonderful books on shame and vulnerability, writes that there is a huge difference between overwhelm and stress. While overwhelm shuts us down, we can usually handle stress. Stress manifests itself as an internal or external pressure to do something. Feeling overwhelmed means we are incapable of doing anything. Too much stress–without effective ways of handling it–often leads to overwhelm.

What are some ways you can prevent overwhelm?

When your only option feels like crawling under a rock, take massive care of yourself. Sleep. Hug a friend. Cry. Then pick ONE THING that will help you move forward again. You can do this.

Know Thyself

Joan Baez is quoted as saying that action is the antidote to despair. Likewise with overwhelm. By taking one tiny step forward, we prevent overwhelm from stopping us in our tracks. In December 2021, I discussed the power of doing one thing to prevent overwhelm.

Another useful strategy is to identify your values, identity, strengths, and desires and review them often when faced with tough decisions. Unsure what you value? Try this worksheet.

An assessment you may find helpful is the Big Five Personality Traits. Unlike other personality tests such as the Myers Briggs Type Indicator, this one is backed by modern research and data analysis and is considered more accurate than older tests.

It uses 100 questions to assess your scores in five areas: Openness, Conscientiousness, Extraversion, Agreeableness, and Neuroticism. (A helpful way to remember them is with the acronym OCEAN). You can take the free assessment here.

he Big Five Personality Traits test suggests that extroverted people are happier. That doesn't mean introverts can't find joy, just that joy comes from solitude rather than parties and crowds. — The Big Five Personality Traits test suggests that extroverted people are happier. That doesn’t mean introverts can’t find joy, just that joy comes from solitude rather than parties and crowds.

An example of how knowing myself better helps me reduce overwhelm: I test as introverted and high in agreeableness. I loathe confrontation. By working hard to develop skills around sticking up for myself, I can prevent future problems that might stem from hot debates I know I can never win. Similarly, knowing that my husband is an extrovert, I can choose to join him at smaller social engagements to prevent overwhelm.

TRY THIS: After completing the MBTI or Personality Traits assessment, think about how knowing more about your deep-rooted personality traits might help you make choices that support you.

Overcome Overwhelm: A Mile Wide, an Inch Deep

My husband asked if I’d heard the saying that fear is a”mile wide and an inch deep.” Edgar Nye first coined the phrase, but he was talking about the Platte River. It applies to overwhelm, as well. After my recent health diagnosis on Monday, I shut down for most of the afternoon.

Fortunately, I had a hike with a friend planned for the next morning. Nothing provides balm for my soul quite like a visit to the mountains.

Hiking with Ajax and a friend helped me reframe my story. I got this. Thanks, Mother Nature.

Following that hike, I faced another medical appointment and classes I wouldn’t have had the bandwidth to face the day before. Did I move through the five stages of grief (ending at acceptance) that quickly? No.

I reframed my story, another technique I wrote about on Jan. 17, 2022. I saw the possible benefits of the new diagnosis as potentially curing another problem I’ve faced for two years. But I had to come to terms with the new information to move forward.

TRY THIS: Think of a situation where you felt shut down. What single step might you take, next time, to pull yourself out of it?

Checklist to Overcome Overwhelm

Once you take any tiny step, you build forward momentum. You overcome overwhelm with action. You won’t drown in an inch of water unless you believe with all your heart that you will. Likewise, if you have confidence that you will find a way forward, you will. What you focus on grows. If you focus on the negative, you will attract more negatives. If you seek the positives, you will find more to support you.

Here are more ideas that might help.

Identify what, specifically, feels overwhelming right now. Journal about it.
Break big goals into smaller steps. Identify ONE and only one thing to do today. If you finish that one, you might find yourself naturally doing another but do not put pressure on yourself.
Differentiate between urgent and important tasks. Make sure you are doing the most important thing today.
Establish a routine to create order and reduce stress.
Delegate tasks to others so you don’t have to do everything yourself. Learn how to say no.
Move. Whether in the mountains or the city, moving will remind you of the importance of taking action.
Create a list of wins, ANYTHING that shows forward progress.

100% of the time when I get overwhelmed, I plan to get out in nature just as soon as I possibly can. For me, nothing heals like a hike in the woods. — Anytime I get overwhelmed, I plan a trip to the mountains as soon as I can. Nothing resets my spirit like connecting with nature.

Overcome Overwhelm: A Few Final Thoughts

No matter what your situation is, as long as you have hope that things will improve, you can overcome overwhelm and move forward. Here are some takeaways for you to try.

Celebrate Small Wins

By taking tiny steps, you build forward momentum. One day that may mean sitting outside in the backyard watching the birds. Getting out of bed to feed your pets. Putting the Twinkies back on the shelf and buying a package of Rotisserie chicken instead. But each of those is a win. And no win is too small.

Acknowledge that Small Wins Lead to Big Wins

I use this example all. the. time. What took me a full 2 weeks in July 2021 – coming up with a blog post to launch into the universe — has become a routine process I do consistently, every week. That one blog post has grown to an entire body – 127 to be exact – of “get unstuck” wisdom I gladly share with my clients and readers. And I refer back to it often as my “Owner’s Manual.”

When your world feels like it is toppling all around you, ground yourself in what you still have. You are, after all, still alive. That's something to be grateful for. — When your world feels like it has toppled all around you, ground yourself in gratitude. After all, you’re still here.

Use Self-reflection to Understand What’s Causing the Feeling

Recognize your progress, no matter how small. Keep taking steps forward, a little at a time. You never know where they might lead you. Record your steps. Make note of what you still have. Write down what you’re grateful for. And get curious about what caused your feelings so you can change the outcome next time.

If you found this article helpful, please share a comment. I love to hear from readers.

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Box Breathing: How To Use It to Manage Anxiety

Box breathing, also known as square breathing, is a powerful technique for managing anxiety. I first introduced it on my blog in December of 2022. Since then, I’ve shared it with coaching clients. It can be quite simple to pause, take a few moments, and calm ourselves whenever we’re stressed. The key is to know the technique and practice it. If you struggle with being anxious, stressed, fearful, or nervous, try it for yourself by following our YouTube video on box breathing. You can also read more about it.

Coach Court shares Box Breathing Minute from our Thrive Clues YouTube channel.

Notice and Name

As you try the box breathing technique demonstrated above in our box breathing video, notice what you feel. Perhaps you feel a shift in mental clarity. Or physical relaxation, including loosening the shoulders or an urge to do some neck rolls. Maybe you feel increased safety or comfort.

If not, remember that mastering any new skill takes practice and repetition. For future practice, try making the exhale take 6 counts instead of 4. Longer exhales are especially helpful for the vagal nerve.

If you did feel something shifted, congratulations! You’ve just learned a powerful tool for resetting yourself whenever you feel anxious.

I may not always have time to get out to my happy place in the mountains. But I always have time for box breathing. Olallie Lake as seen from the trail to Rainbow and Island Lakes.

How Box Breathing Regulates Our Stress Response

Why is Box Breathing so effective? It helps regulate the body’s stress response in several ways.

Encourages Deep Breathing

Box breathing shifts us from a sympathetic (i.e. fight, flight, freeze, or flee) to a parasympathetic (rest and digest) state. We evolved with both. In today’s society, many of us have chronic stress. Try reminding yourself that there is no tiger in the room, no fire to put out, no mammoth at your doorstep.

Deep box breathing increases the supply of oxygen to our brain and stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system, which promotes calmness. We are in a much better position to make important decisions when we are calm. We also are much easier to get along with!

A tarn on the way from Snow Lake to Gem Lake.

Focuses the Mind

Focusing on the simple act of counting helps distract us from anxious thoughts. Counting to four (on the inhale, hold, exhale, and hold, four times for each) provides a simple meditation practice that only takes a few minutes, is free, and is available to everyone at any time.

Such mental focus can quiet the mind, offering a much-needed break from stressors. It therefore helps to reduce our anxiety. It also produces harmony between the mind and body, leading to inner calm as you become more present and engaged with what your body is feeling.

Ajax shows intense mental focus as he checks out something on the other side of the lake.

Finally, practicing box breathing can reduce the production of stress hormones like cortisol, fostering relaxation and reducing anxiety levels.

Box Breathing Improves Physiological Functions

In addition to lowering our blood pressure and providing an immediate sense of calm, box breathing also improves the balance of oxygen and carbon dioxide in the blood. Why is this balance so important? Chat GPT helped me understand two situations that could happen when we are no longer in balance.

Prevent getting caught in a fog. Learn how to control and regulate your breathing to prevent hyperventilation and hypoventilation.

Hyperventilation (Excess Oxygen, Reduced Carbon Dioxide)

During hyperventilation, you breathe out carbon dioxide faster than your body produces it. This leads to a decrease in carbon dioxide levels in the blood, a condition known as hypocapnia. Symptoms include light-headedness, dizziness, shortness of breath, and sometimes tingling in the hands and feet.

Hypocapnia can lead to a constriction of the blood vessels that supply blood to the brain, reducing oxygen delivery to the brain despite high oxygen levels in the blood. This can cause fainting or anxiety symptoms.

The next time you are hyperventilating or feel so angry you could punch a hole in the wall, stop to take some deep box breaths, and see if you can get your blood oxygen levels back in balance.

Smelling or cultivating flowers is another way to calm yourself. This amaryllis was a gift from a client and it's been beautiful to watch bloom. — Smelling or cultivating flowers is another way to calm yourself. This amaryllis was a gift from a client and it’s been beautiful to watch bloom.

Hypoventilation (Reduced Oxygen, Excess Carbon Dioxide)

The reverse, hypoventilation, occurs when breathing is too shallow or too slow, leading to an increase in carbon dioxide because it’s not being expelled at a normal rate. This can lead to hypercapnia, an excessive buildup of carbon dioxide in the blood.

Symptoms include confusion, fatigue, headaches, shortness of breath, and flushed skin. In severe cases, hypercapnia can lead to respiratory acidosis, where the blood becomes too acidic, which can be life-threatening if not treated.

One of the advantages of knowing how to perform pressure breathing at altitude, which we’ll share in a future post, is to expel that built-up carbon dioxide to make more room for more oxygen.

Lakes, rivers, and streams provide the perfect antidote to stress for me. But when I am unable to get to the mountains, I rely on other stress management techniques. Box breathing is one of them.

Box Breathing Takeaways

In summary, if you are looking for a way to help manage stress and anxiety, explore box breathing. You can do it multiple times a day. It is free and readily accessible to everyone. And it is easy to learn. Try the video above and see how it works for you.

And if you’d like to share your experience, please comment below. I love hearing from readers and your comments might help others. Breathe deeply. Breathe well. And keep breathing.

Featured

How to Make Healthy Snack Choices

A question clients often ask me is: What constitutes a healthy snack? The answer varies widely. I’ve shared the concept of “nudging the notch” where we try to make “one step better” choices. I’ve also written about identifying your protein needs which can be a starting point in choosing snacks. Below, I share additional tips on how to make healthy snack choices.

There's nothing inherently "bad" about ANY food (except maybe Doritos...) unless it makes you ill or causes you to overeat. Even something as innocent as fruit can cause an increase in blood sugar, a problem for certain people. Knowing how your body responds to a given food is your first line of defense toward choosing a healthy snack. — There’s nothing inherently “bad” about ANY food (except maybe Doritos…) unless it makes you ill or causes you to overeat. Even something as innocent as fruit can cause an increase in blood sugar, a problem for certain people. Knowing how your body responds to a given food is your first line of defense toward choosing a healthy snack.

Identify Your Traffic Light List

The first step to identifying a healthy snack is knowing how foods affect you. In December of 2022, I shared a post about identifying your traffic light foods to help you choose foods that make you feel and perform your best.

To review, green-light foods are your unique “safe” foods that cause no gastrointestinal problems and do not make you overindulge. Yellow light foods are those you might have occasionally, in small amounts. Red-light items are those that you find impossible to eat in moderation or foods that make you sick or cause you problems.

Artistic creations like this cake are fun to look at, but I know eating even a bit of this would make me feel awful.

My current red-light list includes foods with gluten, sugar, MSG, artificial sweeteners, vegetable oils, corn, and soy. I won’t die from any of them but they will leave me congested or feeling sick to my stomach.

I’ve had issues in the past with fructose (fruit sugar) and tomatoes, but at the moment, they are okay. I also have a strong gag reflex around consuming liver. Eggplant is a big no-no; something about the texture. Everyone’s list is different. Think of it like a fingerprint. If you’d like to develop a personalized traffic light list, use this template from Precision Nutrition.

Avoid Processed, Manufactured Snacks

Once you have an idea of what your red-light and green-light foods are, consider those yellow-light, situationally-okay foods. Clients often struggle with moderation around sweet, salty, or savory treats. Such foods are manufactured to make people crave them. The result? More sales for the manufacturers. More pounds for us. What is a better solution?

One idea is to make sure you’re buying the smallest size possible for any yellow-light foods. If you supersize everything, you or someone you love is going to end up eating it. A pint of ice cream won’t do the same damage as a gallon. Single-serving Doritos pouches, the kind your kids might take in a school lunch, help you identify what a “single serving” looks like: seven chips, not seventy.

Homemade rice flour tortillas are a favorite treat of mine, either as a meal or a healthy snack with freshly made guacamole.

Another idea is to choose single-food snacks such as apple slices with peanut butter, carrot sticks with hummus, or even a can of tuna. Become a label reader. If there is any ingredient listed on the label that you can’t pronounce, put it back on the shelf. What does a partially hydrogenated vegetable oil look like, anyway? What does it to do you? If you don’t know, you might not want to eat it.

Third, whenever you make something at home, you have complete control over the ingredients. I can no longer eat most processed tortillas (corn and gluten are on my avoidance list), but I adore homemade rice flour tortillas made from avocado oil, organic rice flour, water, and sea salt (pictured above).

Protein-Rich Healthy Snack Ideas

A final consideration is to look for ways to add protein to your meals and snacks. A palm-sized serving of protein forms the basis for most meals, according to Precision Nutrition guidelines. My favorite solution is to make more of any dish containing protein (chicken wings, ground turkey, lasagna, shrimp kebabs, burgers, you name it) so that I have protein ready for multiple meals. Who says pulled pork can’t be a breakfast item?

How else might you include protein in more of your snacks? Below are some recipe possibilities you can adjust according to your unique preferences. Experiment to see what works best for you. And share in the comments below if you have a favorite not listed here.

The incredible, edible egg. So many wonderful ways to prepare them, from grab-and-go hard-boiled to creative scrambled eggs.

Super-quick Morning Ideas

If you’re pressed for time in the morning (and who isn’t?) you might want to experiment with one of the recipes below.

Greek Yogurt with Topping:

Plain Greek yogurt (rich in protein, low in sugar).
Add a handful of almonds or walnuts (healthy fats and protein).
Add a quarter cup of frozen or fresh berries (anti-oxidants).
Optional: a sprinkle of cinnamon for flavor.

Dip Sticks:

Cut up celery, bell pepper, or carrot sticks and slather with almond butter (protein and fiber)
Slice apples or pears to dip into your favorite nut butter.
The crunchy texture of either complements the creamy butter.
A great snack for kids: add raisins and call them “ants on a plank.”

Ants on a log are fun eats for kids. Add pear or apple slices and you have a delicious and satisfying snack.

Protein Shake with Greens:

A scoop of your preferred sugar-free protein powder.
Blend with unsweetened almond milk and a handful of spinach or kale.
Quick, nutritious, and can be prepared in minutes.

Edamame with Sea Salt:

Cooked edamame beans (plant-based protein).
Sprinkle with a pinch of sea salt.
Can be served warm or cold.

Healthy Snack Lunch Ideas

For those people who traditionally gravitate toward sandwiches, or who stop by fast-food joints to pick up something when they’re ravenous, here are a few light alternatives to explore.

Turkey Roll-Ups:

Thinly sliced turkey breast (lean protein).
Wrap around cucumber sticks or bell pepper strips.
Secure with a toothpick for easy eating.

Cottage Cheese and Cherry Tomatoes:

A bowl of low-fat cottage cheese (high in protein).
Halved cherry tomatoes for a juicy crunch.
A dash of black pepper or herbs for extra flavor.

Boiled Eggs with Spinach:

Hard-boiled eggs, sliced in half (protein and healthy fats).
Serve on a bed of fresh spinach leaves (iron and vitamins).
Light seasoning with salt and pepper.

Heartier Fare

The ideas below might require a little more preparation, but they also involve more flavor. Experiment to see what works best for you.

Tuna Salad on Bell Pepper Slices:

Mix canned tuna (in water, not oil) with a little mustard and herbs.
Spoon onto thick slices of bell pepper.
Quick, crunchy, and full of protein.

Chicken and Avocado Lettuce Wraps:

Grilled chicken breast, sliced (lean protein).
Wrap in lettuce leaves with avocado slices (healthy fats).
Optional: a squeeze of lime for zest.

Smoked Salmon and Cucumber:

Slices of smoked salmon (omega-3 fatty acids and protein).
Lay on thick cucumber slices.
A touch of dill or lemon juice for flavor.

Whatever you choose, by putting a little more thought into your options, you can add flavor, variety, macronutrients, phytonutrients, and enjoyment to any snack or meal. If you have a favorite, please share in the comments so we can all make healthy snack choices.

Featured

How to Grow a Hiking Practice: Join Court on Squak Mountain

2023 ended for me with a hike on Margaret’s Way (Squak Mountain) with my good friend Pam, who was visiting from Arizona over the holidays. On January 2nd, Ajax and I ushered in 2024 with a solo hike to Central Peak from the south side of Squak. Both got me thinking about what I’d like in the coming year: to increase mindfulness, develop more connections with clients and blog readers, and get consistent with hiking year-round. A client shared an article called “Practice as a Way of Life.” My 2024 intention was born: Add richness to my hiking practice.

Ajax takes a snack break at Bullitt's Fireplace on Squak Mountain, a quarter mile from Central Peak. — Ajax takes a snack break at Bullitt’s Fireplace on Squak Mountain, a quarter mile from Central Peak.

What Do I Mean By “Hiking Practice”?

By “hiking practice” I mean being deliberate about it rather than just “doing” it willy-nilly. Last year I wrote about setting intentions for your hikes. But during the final months of 2023, I missed the mountains so much that I threw myself at Squak Mountain before putting much thought into what I wanted to accomplish.

By way of backstory, I’m more of a fair-weather hiker. Winter for many is “off-season” for hiking. Since COVID I’ve done more off-season hiking than at other times in my life. But when the daylight is short, or it’s cold, rainy, snowy, or, like this morning, extremely windy, I lack consistency. Add to the fact that I was short a hiking partner, and it was easy to skip this morning. Mastery requires consistency, practice, and discipline.

My friend Pam and I pause for a selfie on the Margaret's Way route. — My friend Pam and I pause for a selfie on the Margaret’s Way route. I’m helping her train for the Grand Canyon Rim-to-Rim-to-Rim in May. She helped spark the idea of social hiking support.

I faced a similar challenge last year when I created the Active Ajax Adventures project. My pup and I completed visits to 68 unique green spaces including 20 hikes, ten of them with my daughter. This year, I have several things I want to practice: Being more present on the trail. Exploring nature during all four seasons. And finding more like-minded people who feel the same way.

Perhaps I could use my blog not only to try to generate philosophical discussion and sharing of ideas, but also announcements for group hiking. Who knows, it might also lead to group coaching or networking. Right under my nose is a perfect tool for announcing intentions, and perhaps even generating a local hiking network. I open myself to new possibilities.

Turning an Obstacle Into an Opportunity

As I mentioned in last week’s post, my chosen word for 2024 is OVERCOME. By that, I mean turning obstacles into opportunities. And this presents a perfect way to model change.

My current perceived obstacle is a lack of hiking partners. You’d think that as a coach and current member of the Mountaineers, I would have tons of people to hike with.

May Valley Loop on Squak Mountain. The loop from the south side is 6.6 miles round trip and 2320' elevation gain. It took us 2.5 hours. — May Valley Loop on Squak Mountain. The loop from the south side is 6.6 miles round trip and 2320′ elevation gain. It took us 2.5 hours.

During COVID, my hiking network dwindled to three people. Other friends stopped hiking due to injury, moved away, lost interest, became too busy, or switched goals entirely. I even lost a semi-regular hiking partner to early-onset dementia. My most reliable partner right now is my canine companion, Ajax, who will turn nine in May. How can I find more?

Mindshift time. My current opportunity: reaching out to previous hiking friends and inviting people to join the fun. A bonus would be chatting with others about health and well-being, a topic near and dear to my heart.

Ajax loves our hiking practice. He is always ready and raring to go on Squak Mountain.

My idea may flop. It may succeed. But regardless of the outcome, Ajax and I will be getting out more consistently on Tuesdays, with the bonus of having others join us. If not, I will practice observation, mindfulness, and seeing what the mountain reveals. The only way I’ll fail is to not try.

Why Cultivate a Hiking Practice?

The benefits of hiking regularly are numerous. Beyond the obvious reasons (mental and physical health) hiking provides a great baseline for those who want to climb Rainier, backpack along the Pacific Crest Trail, or trek to Everest Base Camp. Maybe you simply love what it feels like to get outside and leave the city stresses behind.

Putting intentionality into your hiking makes it far more meaningful. Anything that means something to you is more likely to take root and become a consistent habit. So by making hiking a practice, you increase the likelihood of doing it regularly. Win!

A signpost indicates the trailhead for Margaret's Way on Squak Mountain. — A signpost indicates the trailhead for Margaret’s Way on Squak Mountain.

January Hikes on Squak Mountain

So, taking my advice to continue to cultivate a “growth mindset” and “hiking practice,” I’m starting in the mountains several months earlier than usual.

Rain or shine, my chosen destination for January hikes is Squak Mountain. The only deterrent is something that makes hiking unsafe for everyone — high winds like those we’re experiencing this morning in the Pacific Northwest.

If you want to join the fun, ping me ahead of time to learn which route we’re taking, what parking lot we’ll start from, and what time we’ll meet. Hikes will last anywhere from 2-4 hours depending on route, participants, and group pace.

Ajax and I enjoyed the May Valley Loop trail, Squak Mountain.

Frequently Asked Questions

I can imagine the questions rattling around in your brain so I will try to answer them here.

Why Tuesdays? To avoid weekend crowds.

Why early morning? So people can still get most of a day’s work done if they have traditional weekday jobs.

Why daybreak specifically? Going at dawn means we avoid most of the morning rush-hour traffic through downtown Seattle. (I hate traffic snarls). It also means we might hear some lovely birdsong on the trail as birds are active at dawn and dusk.

I'm not opposed to taking our time; it depends on who is in the group. The idea may flop, it may soar; all we can do is try. — I’m not opposed to taking our time; it depends on who is in the group. The idea may flop, it may soar; all we can do is try.

Why Squak? For right now, it is accessible (dusting of snow), it’s close enough to the city to significantly cut down on driving time, and it’s got a wide range of hiking opportunities.

What pace and distance? The target will be 6+ miles and 1500+ elevation gain. Our base pace will be roughly 2 miles per hour at about 1200 feet of gain per hour. If that’s easy for you, carry more weight. If that’s a stretch, come light with a jacket and a water bottle. And it’s okay to do part of the trip and turn around. You gotta start somewhere!

Any substitutions? Maybe. Since I missed today I’m looking for another weekday but it may be just me and Ajax since we have other things we have to work around in our schedule. Oops, there goes another tree branch.

A sitting bench at a viewpoint along the Margaret's Way trail. — A sitting bench at a viewpoint along the Margaret’s Way trail.

Develop Your Hiking Practice on Squak

If you are a current client, you might think of these hiking practice sessions as accountability trips, appointments that will keep you committed to your hiking goals. No membership is required anywhere. These are informal, free Coach Court outings, not sanctioned, organized Mountaineers outings.

If you live in the Pacific Northwest but are not currently engaged with me in Body Results or Thrive Clues coaching, this could be a great opportunity to connect with me at no charge and find out if we might form a collaborative partnership. I only ask that you come eager to walk and be interested in enjoying the outdoors. Win-win!

Featured

Polar Bear Plunge: A Metaphor for a New Year

On New Year’s Day, I celebrated the arrival of 2024 by taking the annual Polar Bear Plunge into Lake Washington. This time — my sixth — my husband AND my daughter joined me. I can’t think of a better metaphor for bringing in a new year than diving into the unknown murky depths and proving how resilient the human spirit is.

My sixth New Year's Day Polar Bear Plunge in Seattle's Lake Washington. The air temp was 49, lake water 43 F. — My sixth New Year’s Day Polar Bear Plunge in Seattle’s Lake Washington. The air temp on Jan. 1, 2024 was 49 F, lake temp 43 F.

A Growing Family Tradition

I spent my childhood in Shorewood, WI, a block off of Lake Michigan. We almost always had snow by Christmas. Sometimes the shore would be covered with windblown jumbled slabs of ice. In that much snow, well… let’s say there were faithful Plungers back in the 70s, but I wasn’t among them. Out of curiosity, I tuned in to Milwaukee’s Youtube plunge video to see what it looked like this year. No snow, clear sandy beach.

When I moved to the Pacific Northwest in the 90s I didn’t even think of the ancient tradition. Our earliest New Year tradition was to spend a day birding at Canada’s Reifel Bird Sanctuary (see last week’s post about the wood duck) or in the Skagit Valley. In 2015 and 2020, we welcomed the New Year from New Zealand. But starting in 2019, if we’ve been in town on the holiday, we take the plunge.

Take a DEEP breath... — Take a DEEP breath…

History of the Polar Bear Plunge

According to a Canadian source, “The polar bear swim started in Vancouver in 1920 by a group of swimmers who called themselves the Polar Bear Club.” Led by Peter Pantages, the group would take a swim. They would probably scoff at the masses of people who follow suit today, jumping in the cold water for less than a minute.

Another website indicated it started even earlier, in 1904, by the L Street Brownies in Dorchester Bay, Massachusetts. Some plunges draw as many as 12,000 participants. Others hold events as fundraisers. The one we do at Matthews Beach is simply for fun.

A beautiful morning at Matthews Beach, with no precipitation, and blue skies on the horizon. — A beautiful morning at Matthews Beach Jan. 1, 2024, with no precipitation, and blue skies on the horizon.

A Personal Challenge

This year, I did two things differently. I went in not only once, but twice, the first time in a wool cap and long-sleeved swim shirt, the second with no hat or shirt so I could go all the way under.

Next year, who knows? I might hold my breath underwater for twenty seconds. Or I might wade out until I can no longer reach the bottom with my feet.

My daughter and I mark the occasion with a silly hat, polar bear stuffy, and polar bear sculpture. — My daughter and I mark the 2024 occasion with a silly hat, polar bear stuffy, and polar bear sculpture.

Why Do the Polar Bear Plunge?

Explaining why I like to do the Polar Bear Plunge is a bit like telling someone why I love to hike. For many reasons. I plunge because it is playful and appeals to my inner child. It’s a bit of a crazy indulgence that allows me to test my resilience, get outside, and mark the change of the year in a unique way. Fortunately, we get to warm up by soaking in our hot tub.

We go well before the official noon kick-off time to avoid all of the crowds. Still, we enjoy marking a new year by doing something most people would call unusual. Fortunately, the six times I’ve done it have been relatively dry and clear days. My husband even asked ahead of time: If it rains, will we bail? To date, I haven’t had to answer that question.

C-C-C-COLD! The author taking the 2021 Plunge.

Choose Your Metaphor

I just can’t help it, I’m a writer. We think in metaphors. I also like keywords. For 2024 I have chosen as my keyword “Overcome”, with “Turn obstacles into opportunities” as my tagline.

Triple OOO.

Whether you prefer last week’s wood duck metaphor (for going with the flow, channeling your inner wood duck to embrace change) or this week’s polar bear plunge metaphor (for plunging into the unknown), find one that works for you.

The author after the 2023 Polar Bear Plunge.

Takeaways

Do something unusual this January. Set some intentions that gently move you out of your comfort zone. Last year, mine was doing 52 rambles with Ajax. This year, I released myself from the power of addictive tendencies.

Just today, I deleted a game app from my phone. I realized while journaling that I started playing it as a coping strategy for a health event I’ve gained closure around. The gaming behavior no longer serves a purpose. It only annoys, angers, and irritates me whenever I can’t move past a level. Who needs that? The world is angry enough without my contribution. We need more light, more joy, more empowerment. In its place? Consistent hiking on Tuesday mornings.

This year I swapped a phone game app for more time in the mountains with my best canine buddy. I will be hiking on Squak Tuesday mornings in January if you care to join the fun. Email me or leave a comment below for details.

Change is hard. But setting up a symbol that works for you can help. It helped me. I’m plunging into the unknown without my crutches, aware that it will be hard. But I also know I have wood ducks and polar bears to emulate. If they can do it, so can I. My track record is strong. I can do this. So can you.

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The Wonderful Wood Duck: a Metaphor for Creative Flow

This week I’ve been listening to recordings of Tama Kieves’ “A Course In Miracles: Creating Flow in Your Life” from the summer of 2023. Flow reminds me of my favorite waterfowl, the wood duck. The Drake, pictured below, is one of the most unique and colorful ducks I’ve ever seen. I channel my inner wood duck when I need to “go with the flow” and let annoyances roll off of me like raindrops on feathers. They have become my metaphor for creative flow and resilience. As Leigh Hunt puts it: “Colors are the smiles of nature”. The male wood duck makes me smile every time I see one.

According to my Ebird.org records, most of my 28 sightings have either been at Juanita Bay Park or Reifel Bird Sanctuary just over the border in Canada. And a look at when I’ve seen these magnificent birds most often – in January – ties nicely with my 2024 intention to view obstacles as opportunities. We’re already planning a trip to visit these beautiful birds.

The elegant male wood duck is one of the most stunning waterfowl in North America.

Fun Facts about the Wood Duck

For this post, I turned to Cornell University to learn more fun facts about this favorite fowl. Not only are they lovely to look at, but they’re also unique and curious creatures.

Males boast a mix of green and blue, a chestnut-breasted chest, orange beak, red eye, and a black-and-white neck. WOW.
Wood ducks live in wooded swamps, where they nest in tree cavities or nest boxes near lakes
Nesting cavities might be up to a mile away from water; they don’t use woodpecker-made cavities
They have strong claws that help them grip bark and perch on branches
Wood ducks pair up in January and produce two broods a year
Females may lay 10-11 eggs, but nests might hold up to 29, the result of “egg dumping” from other females
Ducklings can jump from their tree nests over 50 feet high without getting injured
The oldest known wood duck lived over 22 years
As Ralph Waldo Emerson put it: “Nature always wears the colors of the spirit”. These fancy ducks top them all in North America. Only the Mandarin duck, native to East Asia, is more colorful.

Check out those powerful "claws" on the Drake's webbed feet! — Check out those powerful “claws” on the Drake’s webbed feet!

Embrace Change Gracefully, Like the Wood Duck

Wood ducks thrive in multiple environments throughout the U.S. As dabbling ducks, they feed in the water, but they nest in wooded areas where empty cavities are plentiful. They navigate storms elegantly and gracefully, weathering all kinds of challenges including growing debris in their native waters.

For those of us experiencing life changes (and who isn’t?), we may feel like ducks out of water sometimes. But by focusing on our strengths and capabilities — what comes naturally to us — rather than on perceived lacks or “should” messages, we increase our resilience like the wood duck. If we’re out of our element, how might we adapt? What could be good about the current situation if we rewrite our stories?

Getting Immersed in Flow

One way to increase our resilience is to spend more time in flow. By that, I mean getting immersed in a just-right activity. You may know the feeling: working on a craft, writing something you’re passionate about, helping animals, or doing some project like gardening where you lose track of time.

When wood ducks forage, they go after food with 100% focus. Likewise, when we are doing what comes most naturally to us, or what we’re meant to be doing, time loses its importance.

Birding, hiking, and grounding are such activities for me. I find I am much more creative with my writing when I regularly spend time in nature.

Female wood duck at Juanita Bay. Note the more drab colors and spectacular white eye ring. — Female wood duck navigating obstacles at Juanita Bay. Note the less spectacular colors and white eye ring.

For some, mindfulness, meditation, and yoga are calming activities that invite flow. But if they do nothing for you, think about those engaging and enjoyable activities that allow you to focus on living today, not in the past or future. And I am not referring to gaming, scrolling through cute kitty videos, or chilling with screens. Such activities don’t engage the mind like flow activities do. Where do you experience flow?

Connecting with Your Inner Wood Duck

Albert Einstein put it this way: “Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better”. While I am not a genius, I know the therapeutic healing effect nature has on me. The wood duck and bodies of water are both soothing natural elements. If you’ve been following this blog for a while, you may recall past posts about forest bathing. walking meditation, bird watching, and grounding.

The elements that all these activities have in common are: 1. they are outside activities, 2. they do not involve technology or screens (unless you’re charting your birds); 3. all involve contemplation and mindfulness; 4. time slows down. Elements of flow. Painting landscapes, gardening, hiking, writing at a park or nature retreat, and golfing can all be flow practices.

A female wood duck peers down at us from atop a feeder at Reifel Bird Sanctuary in Canada.

Think about your relationship with nature. When do you most enjoy it? Where? With whom? In 2024, how might you spend more time connecting with nature?

Permission to Be Imperfect

Alice Walker is quoted as saying, “In nature, nothing is perfect and everything is perfect. Trees can be contorted, bent in weird ways, and they’re still beautiful”. If we lived in a world of perfection, it would be a pretty boring place.

What if we viewed our lives the same way — that at any given time, nothing may be perfect and yet everything can still be perfect in its imperfection? How might we feel about all the obstacles in our path? Can we turn obstacles into opportunities? Can we see problems as gifts that can make us stronger?

In one of her classes, Tama Kieves reminds us that large irregular boulders eventually get scoured by the mightiest waters. Can we grant ourselves grace for our imperfections? How might we recognize when we are in flow and permit ourselves time and patience to dip into it when we’re not?

I don’t have answers, merely more questions. I’ll close 2023 with a quote from John Muir: “Nature’s peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop away from you like the leaves of autumn”.

As we approach 2024 I hope wherever you draw inspiration, you can embrace some natural element that symbolizes resilience and flow for you.

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Discipline Equals Freedom: How to Dive Deep Into Change

Recently my husband caught me off guard when he asked, “What does “discipline equals X” make you think of?” I replied with the very first thought that came to mind: “Ball and chain.” I never expected him to insert the word “Freedom” for X. Turns out Jocko Willink wrote a book called Discipline Equals Freedom. I haven’t read it yet. This post is based solely on the title, with some help from Chat GPT 4. But it raises a blog-worthy question: How do you view discipline? And what’s your relationship with it? Let’s take a closer look at what discipline equals.

Orange flowers we spotted on a recent "orange walk". I needed to shift my mindset from frenzied to relaxed. — Orange flowers we spotted on a recent “orange walk”. I needed to shift my mindset from frenzied to relaxed.

Wrapping My Head Around Discipline Equals Freedom

As soon as I finished talking with my husband, I did four things. First, I reserved the book from the library and added it to my growing “Want to read in 2024” pile.

Second, I took a long color walk with my dog around the neighborhood. My daughter suggested I look for the color orange, so I’ve included some of my shots from that walk.

One of 15 orange items we discovered on our orange "color walk" last week. — One of 15 orange items we discovered on our orange “color walk” last week.

Third, I looked up the definition of discipline: roughly, discipline means “doing what needs to be done, even if you don’t want to do it.” Hence my “ball and chain” quip.

Finally, I enlisted Chat GPT’s help to summarize the highlights of Willink’s book. I wanted to see how many of them I’m already doing consistently and what skillset I may still need to develop.

Discipline Equals Freedom: Chat GPT Summary

Here are Willink’s top six points with my reactions to each:

Discipline Is the Path to Freedom

Willink argues that discipline is the key to achieving freedom in all aspects of life. This means consistently following a set of principles and habits that lead to self-improvement and goal attainment.
My biggest fixed mindset issue around this is I used to think that “personal development” meant there was something inherently “broken” or “wrong” about me. Now I can see that if we stop trying to reach goals or improve something in our lives, we’re on our way to the grave. A growth mindset shift.

Wake Up Early

Willink believes that waking up before dawn is a foundational habit that sets the tone for a disciplined day. It’s about taking control of your schedule and maximizing productivity.
Check. For nearly four decades I’ve been a morning person, getting my most productive work — or workouts — in before anything else. If I don’t, I’ll be cranky the rest of the day.

For the past 25 years I've been an alpinist who relishes early morning outings so I can see sunrises such as this, over the Cascade Mountains. Photo taken from Mt. Rainier, July 2017, before 5 a.m. — For the past 25 years I’ve been an alpinist who relishes early morning outings so I can see sunrises such as this, over the Cascade Mountains. Photo taken from Mt. Rainier, July 2017, before 5 a.m.

Prioritize and Execute

Willink advises to prioritize the most important tasks and focus on executing them well. This approach helps in managing stress and being effective in both personal and professional life.
This is one area I could improve. It is also not new to me. Stephen Covey addresses something similar in his bestselling book, the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.

Physical Fitness

In Discipline Equals Freedom, Willink asserts that rigorous exercise not only strengthens the body but also builds mental toughness and discipline. He emphasizes consistency and pushing beyond comfort zones.
Check. Frequent physical activity has been one of my pillars of health and well-being since high school and provides emotional satisfaction, enhanced sleep, joint lubrication, weight management, personal challenge, and the ability to do all the things I want to do without pain or injury.

Hiking with Ajax on W. Tiger trails brings me immense joy as well as a new outlook on my struggles.

Detachment for Better Decision-Making

Willink recommends maintaining an emotional detachment when making decisions. This detachment allows for clearer thinking and better decision-making, especially in high-pressure situations.
Ooh boy. This reminds me of “Care less about an issue than your clients,” a behind-the-scenes tip Precision Nutrition coaches are taught when facing client resistance or emotionally charged topics. If we care more about a client’s successes or failures than they do, it’s a recipe for disaster for the highly sensitive coach.

Ownership of Mistakes

Willink emphasizes the importance of taking full responsibility for one’s actions and their outcomes, including mistakes. This mindset fosters growth, learning, and improvement.
This leads perfectly to where I’m headed in 2024. I want to cultivate a growth mindset in all areas, particularly around technology, communication, and spirituality, not just where I already have it in writing, training, and physical fitness.

Another treasured orange item on my recent "orange walk." It yielded 15 different items, rather a surprise in December. — Another treasured orange item on my recent “orange walk.” It yielded 15 different items, rather surprising in December.

Implementing for Change

So, what is the takeaway for you? You are here because you want something. And you want to get it with as little struggle or effort as possible. Maybe you’re looking for knowledge. Perhaps you want to change something. Or it could be that you’re following this blog to glean whatever nuggets you can. In Discipline Equals Freedom, Willink asserts that we need to delay instant gratification and be adults today so we gain freedom tomorrow.

Sometimes we need to do hard things, consistently, to get a payoff. If change were easy, we’d all be exactly where we want to be. We want the new job. The successful summit. A higher paycheck. Annual vacations. Stronger relationships. Fitter physique. A significant other.

My Rainier team from July, 2017. Discipline equals freedom. Consistent focus is the only way to attain your goals.

Discipline In My Life

Discipline requires ongoing effort. It took me nine years to publish my first book. I needed seven years to finally start my blog. And I put off shooting a one-minute video for my new health and wellness company. for nearly ten months. It doesn’t mean I was working steadily during all that time. Enter our friend, procrastination.

In each case, it would have been far less stressful if I’d just had the discipline to do the thing, rather than put it off indefinitely. But the payoff is this: by putting in the time, you get the results. The only way NOT to get them is to never even try or to quit when things get hard.

What are you putting off? What commitment would you like to make for 2024? Who can you share it with, in writing, so that you are more likely to follow through? Who can you tell, out loud, so that the world hears your intention — and so do you?

Even if you say your intentions out loud to your best canine companion, the multiverse has ears. You do, too. Hearing your intentions will make them much more likely to solidify and come true. So say your intentions out loud. Embrace 2024 as the year you will do X.

Featured

I Am Enough: Acrostic Poems about Change and Growth

This post is for all my readers who might be facing fears or dealing with the concept of “good enough.” I offer five acrostic poems starting with the letters in “I AM ENOUGH.” Each focuses on an aspect of change and growth.

To create these acrostics, I combined all of my fall coursework into one creative experiment. The Art of Journal Coaching program inspired me to create transformational journal prompts for clients. The Precision Nutrition master coaching program helps me guide clients to better results than ever before. My exploration of AI taught me how to tap into the phenomenal potential of Chat GPT. Finally, by working with spiritual coach Tama Kieves I am learning that we are either reacting from a place of love or fear and how to shift to a growth mindset. May you tap into your inner wisdom with these poems and prompts.

Change and growth happen in stages. Nature demonstrates this very well.

I Am Enough: Embracing Growth

Change is never linear, as much as we might love for it to be. Sometimes progress involves taking three steps forward and two steps back. By remaining open to possibility and approaching our challenges from love rather than fear, we can approach our struggles with a growth mindset and see obstacles as opportunities. The first acrostic poem embraces growth.

In every challenge, there’s a lesson to unearth,

Amidst the trials, we discover our true worth,

Moments of doubt transformed into strength,

Every step forward, a victory at length,

Nurturing hope, in darkness and light,

Opening our hearts to new insight,

Understanding that growth involves flight,

Grasping change, holding on tight,

Harmony found on a journey of delight.

Ajax struggles to find his footing crossing a bridge designed to drain well but that spooks smaller dogs.

SUGGESTED JOURNAL PROMPTS:

Where did you see the most growth in 2023?

Are there areas in which you feel “I am enough” is already appropriate for you?

Where would you like to expand in 2024? Jot down a few notes about where you are right now.

Transformation Journey

On December 13, 2021, I experienced a health event that took me three days to overcome physically, but two years to heal from emotionally. I now know my wounds from the past simply need time to heal. And I need to reframe many of my old stories that are no longer serving me. The second poem involves a transformational journey.

Inside us all, a seed of change does sleep,
Awakening slowly, from the shadows deep,
Moving through life, with courage and grace,
Each obstacle faced in time and space,
New paths unfold as old ones merge,
Old beliefs are challenged; new truths emerge,
Unveiling strength we never knew we had,
Growing beyond, both happy and sad,
Holding onto good will conquer bad.

Trees transform every year. Like nature, we experience seasons of ebb and flow. For some, winter is a time of celebration, of rest, and recovery. What does winter mean to you?

SUGGESTED JOURNAL PROMPTS:

How are you transforming aspects of yourself?

What “season” do you most identify with and why?

Where is one area of your life you want to transform in 2024 to “I am enough”? What tools do you need to do so?

I Am Enough: A Journey of Self-Discovery

We all have enormous untapped potential within us. And self-doubting, fearful, negative thoughts are our biggest obstacles. What stands in your way? For some, earning enough money or getting the right education are big barriers. For others, it might be finding — or making — enough time. Everyone has 24 hours a day. Are you coasting, or are you trying to live your best life?

In the mirror of time, our reflections grow,
As we journey through life, embracing ebb and flow,
Memories are woven into the fabric of our being,
Every experience is a new way of seeing,
Never stagnant, always in motion,
Overcoming fears like waves in the ocean,
Uplifting our spirits with each challenge met,
Guided by hope and without regret,
Heart and soul merge, like dancing with a pet.

Sometimes we need to change lenses to view our situation differently. Think outside the box. Or better yet, get an outsider's perspective on your problems. A coach, mentor, or confidante can help you see things in a new way. — Sometimes we need to change lenses to view our situation differently. Think outside the box. Or better yet, get an outsider’s perspective on your problems. A coach, mentor, or confidante can help you see things in a new way.

SUGGESTED JOURNAL PROMPTS:

What did you discover about yourself in 2023? What are three things you’d love to explore in 2024?

Do you know anyone who truly believes “I am enough?” What qualities of theirs do you admire?

Is there a different lens you’d like to use to think about your future?

The Path of Resilience

As I review all of my physical accomplishments over the past two years, it surprises me how much I’ve overcome: a broken right wrist, heat exhaustion, unusual nerve issues in my left hip that David Grey’s PT program helped me with, a coronary artery spasm caused by an electrolyte imbalance and excessive stress, and a bout with COVID-19. If there’s one thing I can say with confidence, my physical body is impressively resilient. In 2024 I will be shifting my focus to exploring a path of spiritual and emotional healing.

Inner strength emerges from struggles and strife,
As we carve our paths into the tapestry of life,
Molding our destiny with hands of hope,
Evolving, adapting, learning to cope,
Navigating through storms with resilience and might,
Opportunities shining in the darkest night,
Unbroken, unyielding in our quest to thrive,
Gaining wisdom as we strive,
Honoring the journey, strong and alive.

I am enough. I am not one to let physical ailments get in the way. The mountains are calling and I must go.

SUGGESTED JOURNAL PROMPTS:

Where do you feel you are most resilient?

What superpowers do you draw on when you face a challenge?

Where would you like to build more resilience in 2024?

Embracing Change

The only constant in life is change. Many friends, family members, and clients are facing big changes this week. Home remodels. Loss of loved ones. New business ventures. Conflicts with family. Holiday stress. Upcoming trips. Or perhaps I’m just hearing more about it because of the time of year.

What would happen if we could look at change, including mistakes and failures, through the lens of “What can I learn from this?” or “How might I see this differently?” Control is an illusion. Let it go.

Illuminating the path with each step we take,

Accepting the flux in every wake,

Mastering fears, setting our soul free,

Encountering life with a heart open to see,

Nurturing growth in every form,

Owning our story, through calm and storm,

Unveiling our potential in every act,

Gracious in our rise after each impact,

Home in our skin, embracing change.

SUGGESTED JOURNAL PROMPTS:

As you read through this blog post, what thoughts come to mind? What does it mean to you to “be enough”?

Where do you feel you are “enough” in your life? Where do you feel inadequate?

Generate your own “I AM ENOUGH” poem or journal entry.

I Am Enough: Takeaways

I am enough. You are enough. We have all the tools we need within us. Relax. Trust the process. In the words of Tama Kieves, “Stop efforting.”

My blog continues to be a place where I explore change and getting unstuck. This particular post has been a journey into all things I hold dear: poetry, journaling, learning, transforming, writing, photography, and physical challenge. I hope you found some part of it to be helpful or interesting.

And as always, if you have thoughts about the phrase “I am enough,” please share them in the comments. I love hearing from readers.

Featured

Hiking Break: the Skill and Art of the Perfect Pause

Another shout-out goes to KJ for providing this week’s blog topic. He asked for advice on rest stops during hikes. Let’s take a closer look at the perfect pause: the skill — and art — of the hiking break.

My dog Ajax is my barometer for hiking breaks, especially on hot sunny days. Rests allow us to recharge, get a bite to eat, change clothes, take in the scenery, repair feet... the list is long. — My dog Ajax is my barometer for hiking breaks, especially on hot sunny days. Rests allow us to recharge, get a bite to eat, change clothes, take in the scenery, repair feet… the list is long.

When Is a Good Time for a Hiking Break?

The short answer to “When should I take a break?” is “Anytime it feels like you need one.” Here are some examples of when to insert a break into your hike.

Physical Condition: Whenever you’re feeling exhausted, take a break. Keep track of your energy level, muscle fatigue, joint or tissue discomfort (think forming blisters), and hydration status. It’s far better to stop and take care of a small problem than continue indefinitely into it blossoms into an injury, crisis, or worse.
Trail Difficulty: If you are traveling over steep inclines, rugged terrain (think bushwhacking), or extra long distances you may want to plan more frequent breaks than if you’re traveling on flat trails.
Weather Conditions: On hot days, it’s crucial to take breaks to hydrate and prevent overheating. In cold or wet conditions, breaks provide a chance to warm up or change into dry clothing.
Group Dynamics: If you hike with a group, be mindful of the needs and preferences of your fellow hikers. Some people may require more frequent breaks than others, so look for a balance that works for everyone. The exception to this is guides that require a certain climbing pace; check ahead of your climb to know what the pace expectations are and how many breaks you can expect.
Time Constraints: If you have a specific goal, such as reaching a certain point or finishing the hike by a particular time, plan the number and length of your breaks accordingly to stay on track.

On our hike to Mirror Lake, we took this hiking break to let a large, noisy group of adults go by. Ajax and my daughter both love breaks. And I love to explore for photo ops.

Types of Breaks

I know several people who prefer not to stop on the trail. They argue that taking breaks makes it harder to get going again. My breaks usually aren’t very long, especially when it’s just me and my dog. Here’s how I take breaks.

My general pattern is to hike for 15-20 minutes to set a good rhythm. Our first stop is usually a “clothing break” to remove a layer and get out my water bottle. Roughly every hour, I give my dog a biscuit and water, if he’s not drinking from streams, and at the two-hour mark, I give him a more substantial snack, usually part of an early lunch. He’s earned it by then!

Our breaks are usually only 3-5 minutes on the trail, perhaps 15-30 at our destination depending on the view and the weather. This summer my daughter and I spent several hours at various alpine lakes swimming. In those cases, the goal was to have a lake experience, rather than just a hike.

Taking a dip in chilly Rachel Lake. Our rest break on this hike was close to 1.5 hours and included having lunch, exploring side trails, a party separation, and swimming!

Why Take a Hiking Break?

The list of reasons for stopping includes:

Rest and Recover: Give your muscles and joints a chance to recover from the physical exertion of hiking.
Hydrate: Pause to drink water and stay properly hydrated, especially on hot days.
First Aid: Attend to any minor injuries or hot spots (before they form blisters) with a first-aid kit.
Adjust Gear: Make adjustments to your hiking gear or clothing for comfort and safety.
Check the Map: Review your trail map or GPS to ensure you’re on the right path.
Navigation: Plan your next steps and discuss your hiking route with your partners. This might also include exploring options for future hikes, scouting campsites, or evaluating extended rest spots.

Some of my very best photos come during hiking breaks with my dog Ajax. This was on the summit of West Tiger 1 on September 23.

What to Do During Breaks

And if you’re not a big fan of hiking breaks but you’re exploring with people who need more frequent rest stops than you do, here are some helpful suggestions for things you can do while you wait:

Snack: Replenish energy levels with a healthy snack to keep your stamina up.
Spot Wildlife: Keep an eye out for wildlife and take the time to observe and appreciate their presence.
Shoot Photos: Capture scenic landscapes, tiny mushrooms or slugs, birds, and wildlife on camera. Open your eyes to the beauty around you.
Stretch: Perform some gentle stretches to prevent muscle stiffness and improve flexibility.
Social Interaction: If you hike with others, use break time to talk with your partners and ask good questions.
Scenery: Take in the breathtaking views and appreciate the beauty of nature around you.

Sometimes rest stops become a great excuse to explore what's around you, just off the main path. A hike to Wallace Falls took us off-trail to this upstream area. Beautiful! — Sometimes rest stops become a great excuse to explore what’s around you, just off the main path. A hike to Wallace Falls took us off-trail to this upstream area. Beautiful!

Where to Take a Hiking Break

You can take a break just about anywhere. Make sure to leave plenty of room for other people to get around you. Step to the side or completely off the trail so you do not block traffic. It’s also a good idea to plan your break where people can take “party separations” without being interrupted.

On sunny days, choose shady spots. On rocky trails, look for larger rocks that might provide a temporary seat. I like to look for logs without moss (on damp days moss can soak up a ton of moisture and leave your bottom wet!) or at the very least a pull-out where I have a place to set down my pack and get out a food or water bowl for my dog.

Teneriffe Falls across the stream, away from the masses of hikers.

I could tell from Ajax's expression that this wasn't the best choice of rest spot for him, but we prioritized getting away from the crowd over his comfort this time. — I could tell from Ajax’s expression that this wasn’t the best choice of rest spot for him, but we prioritized getting away from the crowd over his comfort this time.

Ideally, we look for spots with views so we can get some nice photographs. Pick a place that is away from crowds, safe, and comfortable for everyone in your party. Consider what characteristics make up the ideal rest spot for you.

And it probably goes without saying — but I’ll say it anyway — in winter, never take a break while you’re crossing avalanche-prone slopes. Get to stable ground before you stop. Likewise, in high wind, avoid standing under widowmakers, or trees that are losing big branches. Always keep safety in mind.

How To Learn More

To expand your education on trail safety and mountain travel, a great organization I’ve been a member of for over thirty years is the Seattle Mountaineers. To read more about break time optimization, here is another point of view. Backpacking Light has a thread on their forum about rest periods when hiking. And Love the Backcountry has yet more advice. The main point is: you’re not in a race. Take breaks as needed and enjoy your experience. If you drive yourself into the ground, where’s the joy in that?

Heading toward the Emmons Glacier route on Mt. Rainier. This was our first break spot before heading up to the moraine and the steep climb to Camp Schurman. Timing and planning of appropriate breaks requires experience, skill, and art. — Heading toward the Emmons Glacier route on Mt. Rainier. This was our first break spot before heading up to the moraine and the steep ascent to Camp Schurman. Timing and planning of appropriate breaks requires experience, skill, and art.

If you have a break tip you’d like to share, or a burning question you’d like me to answer this month, please submit it below. I love hearing from readers and I always look forward to requests.

Featured

Unique Advent Adventures for Your 2023 Holidays

I get it. You’re busy. Who isn’t? If you don’t take care of yourself, who will? Leap into December with this fun month-long challenge. I call it “Advent Adventures.” It’s custom-tailored for busy, active adventurers who feel stressed out. Each is designed to be short, manageable, and doable during the winter season. Are you ready? Take a look at your daily rewards for all that you do, and join me in getting unstuck!

Yesterday I took a ramble with a writing partner and Ajax to look for holiday-themed photo ops to support this blog post. Some cool colorful rocks were on display in a yard in Shoreline.

Advent Adventures Dec. 1-5

The guidelines are easy: find time in your calendar to carve out 5-20 minutes in your day devoted solely to you. If you know one of the challenges won’t work on a given day, find one that will. Then get out from behind your computer and do something nice for yourself. And if you prefer using this as a calling to generate your own challenges, feel free.

Dec. 1: Morning Stretch Routine: Start your day with a 10-minute stretching routine to energize your body.

Dec. 2: Indoor Plant Care: Spend 15 minutes caring for indoor plants, reconnecting with nature indoors.

Dec. 3: Winter Nature Walk: Take a brisk 20-minute walk in a nearby park, focusing on the winter scenery.

Dec. 4: Mindful Hot Beverage Break: Enjoy a hot cup of tea or coffee outdoors, savoring the warmth and flavors.

Dec. 5: Winter Sunrise Viewing: Watch a winter sunrise, reflecting on your intentions for the day.

Advent adventures don't have to take much time. I enjoyed a recent sunrise from my back porch. — Advent Adventures don’t have to take much time. I enjoyed a recent sunrise from my back porch.

Advent Adventures Days 6-15

Good work! You’re on a roll. What have you enjoyed about your challenge so far? What do you notice when you make some time for yourself? Have you smiled? Did you tell anyone about your journey? Here are the next ten adventures to get you to your halfway point.

Dec. 6: Bird Watching: Spend time observing birds from your balcony, backyard, walk, or window.

Dec. 7: 5-Minute Outdoor Meditation: Practice a quick meditation or deep breathing exercise on your porch or yard.

Dec. 8: Photo a Day: Capture a daily photo of something outdoors that brings you joy or peace.

Dec. 9: Guided Outdoor Stretching: Follow a short guided stretching or yoga video outside.

Dec. 10: Gratitude Journaling: Write down three things you’re grateful for, ideally in an outdoor setting.

Grounding in the rain inside my bird blind tent. The other day my feet got so cold, I borrowed water from our hot tub to alternate soaks. — Grounding and journaling under protection from the rain in my bird blind tent. The other day my feet got so cold, I borrowed water from our hot tub to alternate soaks.

Gaining Momentum

Dec. 11: Star Gazing Moment: Spend a few minutes gazing at the stars, contemplating the vastness of the universe.

Dec. 12: Quick Nature Sketching: Sketch something you see in nature, even if it’s only for 5 minutes.

Dec. 13: Lunch Break Walk: Take a brief walk during your lunch break, focusing on being mindful and paying attention to all five senses. What can you observe that you don’t normally notice?

Dec. 14: Evening Candle Meditation: Meditate with a candle or stare into a fire for a few minutes, focusing on the dancing flame. If you don’t have candles or a fireplace, try a walk around the block to view holiday lights.

Dec. 15: Frosty Morning Observation: Spend a few minutes observing frost patterns on leaves or windows.

Advent adventures can help you appreciate the beauty all around us. Frost makes gorgeous patterns on the leaves.

Notice and Name: Days 16-25

You’ve reached the halfway mark in your Advent Adventures challenge. Have you missed a day or two? That’s okay! The point is to do something kind for yourself each day that allows you to think about what is important and what matters. Self-care is a skill just like bike mechanics or publishing a blog. The more we practice a skill, the more second nature it becomes. Keep going and reap more benefits.

Dec. 16: Winter Bird Feeding: Set up or refill a bird feeder and watch visiting birds.

Dec. 17: Indoor Yoga Flow: Do a quick yoga session inside, focusing on breathing and balance.

Dec. 18: Window Garden Tending: Spend some time tending to a small herb or flower garden on your windowsill.

Dec. 19: Moon Journaling: Write in your journal by moonlight or near a window on a moonlit night.

Dec. 20: Holiday Lights Walk: Take an evening walk to enjoy neighborhood holiday lights.

Holiday lights display at Woodland Park Zoo. I loved this beautiful peacock.

Winter Solstice

Dec. 21: Short Hike: The shortest day (light) of the year! Embark on a short, local hike, appreciating the winter landscape. Feel gratitude that from here on out the days start to get longer again.

Dec. 22: Sunset Reflection Time: Watch a sunset and reflect on your achievements and challenges of the day.

Dec. 23: Indoor Strength Session: Enjoy a quick, focused 15-minute yoga, strength, or pilates workout to strengthen and center your body.

Dec. 24: Snowflake Study: Let it snow! If it does, take a moment to observe the uniqueness of snowflakes.

Dec. 25: Holiday Decoration Tour: Take a walk to enjoy holiday decorations in your area.

Beautiful baubles on an outdoor display during my Shoreline ramble yesterday.

Finish the Year Strong: Dec. 26-31

Most advent calendars end on December 25. But we are about to launch a new year and a new you. If you’ve missed any days and wish to replace — or even repeat — a few from the previous adventures, feel free. This is your life and what replenishes your spirit is unique to you. Here are the final suggestions and warmest wishes for a wonderful end to 2023.

Early Morning Silence: Experience the quiet of early morning before the day begins.
Nature Poetry Reading: Read a nature-themed poem outdoors or near an open window.
Outdoor Aromatherapy: Use essential oils outdoors for a quick aromatherapy session.
Flashlight Night Walk: Take a brief walk at night with a flashlight, exploring the familiar in a new light.
Recap what went well in 2023: List your five favorite memories or accomplishments from 2023. What five things would you most like to have happen in 2024? Write them down.
Quick Cold-Weather Swim: If accessible, take a brief swim in an indoor or heated pool. Or better yet, if you’re in the Seattle area and feeling brave, head to Matthews Beach at noon on New Year’s Day for the wildly popular Polar Bear Plunge. This shot was from January 1, 2023. Hope to see you there to kick off 2024!

Featured

Trail Etiquette 101: How to Share the Trail

A special thanks to KJ for his recent question. He asked about how to prepare for aggressive, belligerent, or annoying hikers on the trail. I thought it was a perfect time to write a post about trail etiquette and how best to navigate around others.

Headed for Rainier's summit in July 2017. Popular destinations around the country, especially in nice weather, will have hordes of people to deal with. Know these tips and you'll be able to survive the crowds. — Headed for Rainier’s summit in July 2017. Popular destinations around the country, especially in nice weather, will have hordes of people to deal with. Know these tips and you’ll be able to survive the crowds.

Respect Right-of-Way

Generally speaking, just like with driving (for people in the U.S.) try to keep to the right side of the trail when approaching other hikers. There are exceptions — such as a narrow trail where the only natural pullout is on the other side of the trail.

New hikers may not be aware that trail etiquette dictates the UPHILL traveler has the right of way. If the trail is flat, use common sense, be polite, and wait your turn. Treat others as you would like to be treated. And if someone is struggling (i.e. if they’re being helped down the trail due to illness or injury), give them extra space and time–even if you’re heading up.

A root-filled section of the trail on the way to Rachel Lake. Trail etiquette states that the person climbing up such a steep part of the trail has the right of way.

Avoid High Usage Times and Locations

Despite national, volunteer, and outdoor organizations — think Mountaineers, Washington Trails Association, and the Sierra Club — offering training in proper trail etiquette, not everyone who ventures to the mountains has learned how to respect others while sharing the trails. What’s more, since COVID, many people have headed for the backcountry who otherwise wouldn’t be there.

While I love the fact that more people are heading outside, newbies may not know how to behave around others. Or worse, they simply don’t care. I recently added Snow Lake to my “rethink” list because of youngsters cranking rap music without personal listening devices.

Snow Lake is accessible, beautiful, and refreshing on a hot summer day. It's also highly visited as you can see every inch of available shoreline covered with people. — Snow Lake is accessible, beautiful, and refreshing on a hot summer day. It’s also wildly popular as you can see every inch of available shoreline covered with people.

We can’t control others’ behaviors. The very best way to avoid disrespectful behavior is to select less popular hiking routes where there won’t be hordes of people. Hike in the off-season when crowds are less likely. Go when it’s raining to cut down on crowding. Avoid holiday hiking when everyone else has a day off. And go at dawn or dusk when there are fewer people on the trail. My favorite idea is to hike during the week. No weekend mobs!

Trail Etiquette: Respect Multiple Uses

I love visiting the mountains to recharge, to listen to birds, rustling leaves, and flowing water. On the Snow Lake hike, I should have been able to hear 25-28 bird species. We only heard 7. Too many kids chattered or made annoying monkey calls. Instead of coming back stress-free, I felt like smacking the next pair who approached deep in loud conversation.

Rattlesnake Ledge is another “rethink” destination for me. Following hundreds of other hikers and their dogs without any chance of solitude feels too much like walking around Green Lake in Seattle on a sunny weekend. First, the likelihood of running into a problem dog is high. And second, if I wanted to be outside around scores of people I’d save gas and head to the nearest dog park.

Tiger Mountain's Poo Poo Point on the Fourth of July. We encountered dozens of people who seemed unaware of proper trail etiquette. — Tiger Mountain’s Poo Poo Point on the Fourth of July. We encountered dozens of people who seemed unaware of proper trail etiquette.

Trail Etiquette: Control Your Own Response

If you use headphones or earbuds, realize that you might have difficulty hearing approaching hikers or trail runners. Get to know when trail runners are out and consider hiking without music or podcasts. Along the I-90 corridor, weekend mornings between 7-9 a.m. seem to be popular. And if you’re using multi-purpose trails, know which paths might include mountain bikers, snowmobiles, or equestrians. By doing a little research you won’t be caught off guard.

When you encounter people who seem to be going about your pace but show signs of impatience, step off the trail to let them pass. Anyone itching to be “first” might get nasty about trailing a slower hiker. No need to provoke them. Remember, it’s always okay to stop and take a water break, remove or add a layer of clothing, or get a bite to eat.

I only know of two negatives of hiking solo. There's nobody to take your photo, so you're stuck with selfies, and you can't have a conversation unless you enjoy talking to your dog! — I only know of two negatives of hiking solo. There’s nobody to take your photo, so you’re stuck with selfies, and you can’t have a conversation unless you enjoy talking to your dog!

Try timing rest breaks to coincide with when others around you might be just finishing theirs. This provides more space on the trail so you aren’t all clustered together. Preventing your OWN ‘road rage’ from building up will lead to a much more enjoyable outing.

Use Breathwork Techniques

If you do find yourself getting annoyed, remind yourself that you are in control of your thoughts and experiences. Try taking 3-4 box breaths – 4 counts in, hold for 4 counts, 4 counts out, hold out for 4 counts for 4 repetitions. This is a great stress control breathing technique to use anytime you feel your blood starting to boil. Remember, you cannot control others!

Takeaway Tips

Recognize that people have different reasons for going to the mountains. Trail runners love going fast. Kids love messing around and exploring. Naturalists love looking at flowers and plants. Birders love listening to birds. Trail etiquette means respecting ALL people’s rights to enjoy whatever they’re out to enjoy.

If you feel someone’s behavior is irritating more people than just you, you might consider politely pointing out the offense. They may not even be aware they’re doing something that is bothering anyone.

Prepare for alternate plans. If you have to walk half a mile to get to the trailhead because there’s no available parking, consider doing another hike. Mark overused trails as ones to avoid during popular hours since people usually return to their favorite places.

The author and her daughter at Annette Lake. May all your hikes be sources of enjoyment and wonder. Share the trails. They hold delight for everyone.

By keeping these tips in mind, everyone can enjoy themselves and share the wonders of the wilderness. If you have a tip I’ve overlooked, please share it in the comments, so we can all learn from one another.

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Non-Food Celebrations: How To Mark Achievements

Recently, I asked a client to come up with non-food celebrations she could enjoy whenever she completed small victories. When she came up blank, I realized the topic might make a great post. Rather than finishing something and diving right into whatever is next, pause and recognize what you’ve accomplished. Get off that hamster wheel! By acknowledging and celebrating each small victory, you will make it easier, more fun, and more rewarding to strive for the next thing.

Whenever Ajax does something courageous, like going across tricky bridges, I make sure to include a non-food celebration with him (praise and pats). What could you use to recognize and celebrate the completion of hard tasks? — Whenever Ajax does something courageous, like going across tricky bridges, I make sure to include non-food celebrations with him (praise and pats). What could you use to recognize and celebrate the completion of your hard tasks?

Shifting Focus: Previous Blog Posts

I have written before about shifting our focus (with a key takeaway from each) in the following blog posts:

Gap and the Gain: A Powerful Shift for the Brain (5/9/22) in which I point out the importance of tracking progress to see where you started and how far you’ve come. If we can’t recognize the small victories as we go, we can easily get discouraged. Click for more on Dan Sullivan’s book, The Gap and The Gain.

How to Reframe Self-Talk for Greater Gain (5/28/22) By changing the words we use to describe a situation, we change our attitude toward it. Even – perhaps especially – obstacles can be seen as opportunities if we embrace them that way.

Another tricky surface for Ajax is a pebbly beach at Seahurst Park. Fortunately, he was so distracted by all the wonderful smells (and surprise! salt water is NOT good for drinking) that he handled it okay. We celebrated with a game of Rah, or jump for the leash. — Another tricky surface for Ajax is a pebbly beach at Seahurst Park. Fortunately, he was so distracted by all the wonderful smells (and surprise! salt water is NOT good for drinking) that he handled it okay. “We celebrated with a game of Rah, or “jump for the leash.”

Rising Strong Lesson: The Story I’m Telling Myself (7/12/22) A powerful tool for reframing the half-truths or blatant lies we’ve been telling ourselves for too long. If you tell yourself you’ll never reach X goal, you’re right. If you convince yourself this is just another test, and you keep going, nothing will stop you. Click for more on Brene Brown‘s awesome resources.

Accomplishing Your Goal, Handling Anticipointment (7/21/22) Tips for moving on after you accomplish a major goal. Celebrate, sure, but also pause and recognize how far you’ve come.

Even finishing raking the entire yard can turn into a non-food celebration. When was the last time you played in the leaves?

Embrace Small Wins

What is new, however, is the focus on embracing each small win. Especially whenever we’re feeling stuck or unmotivated. I was recently reminded that what we look for, we find. If we look for problems, we’ll see them everywhere.

But we can develop, cultivate, and practice a more capable mindset and different skills. In particular, the skill of looking for moments to celebrate. We can train our brains to find them. Below are some ways to start your practice.

I look for color on every single hike, ramble, or walk, just as I've trained my ear to listen for birds. Do you pay attention when you're outside, or do you go on auto-pilot? What would you notice if you left your earphones and phone at home? — I look for color on every single hike, ramble, or walk, just as I’ve trained my ear to listen for birds. Do you pay attention when you’re outside, or do you go on auto-pilot? What would you notice if you left your earphones and phone at home?

Non-Food Celebrations: Ideas 1-5

I compiled a list of non-food celebrations to commemorate small wins. Each of the next ten items can be completed in as little as five minutes. All are completely free and available to anyone. Try generating your own list of ideas springing from the suggestions below. Have fun with it!

Mini Meditation Session: Hold a brief walking or seated meditation focused on gratitude for and acknowledgment of the achievement. Embrace the feeling of accomplishment. Mark it deep within.
Short Gratitude Journal Entry: Write a quick note in a notebook or journal about what you feel grateful for in this moment, as you focus on your recent victory. Embrace the effort that went into it.
Celebratory Dance: Put on a favorite song and hold a little dance party. It’s a joyful, energizing way to mark a milestone. Put your hands in the air, jump around, and smile big. You did it! Really feel it.
Nature Connection: Spend a few minutes outside, taking in fresh air, and appreciating the natural surroundings, whether it’s in your backyard, a nearby park, or just a view of the sky.
Mindful Breathing Exercise: Do a focused breathing exercise, taking deep, intentional breaths to sink that great feeling deep in your body and soul.

Non-Food Celebrations: Ideas 6-10

Remember that everyone’s list of non-food celebrations will look different. What feels like a great idea to me may not resonate with you, and that’s totally okay. What you’re after are ways you can celebrate that will hold deeper meaning than just a simple check on a to-do list.

Personal Affirmation: Create and recite a positive, personal affirmation that celebrates your current success and supports you toward future progress.
Virtual High-Five: Send a quick message or email to a friend, family member, or coach sharing your success. Give yourself a virtual pat on the back. A sticker on a calendar, or in a journal, can also be fun.
Quick Stretching Routine: Perform a brief stretching routine, focusing on releasing tension and infusing the moment with a sense of accomplishment.
Reflective Walk: Take a short, mindful walk, even if it’s just around the block or office, and reflect on what you’ve achieved.
Visualization Exercise: Spend a few minutes visualizing the next step toward your goal, reinforcing your commitment while celebrating how far you’ve come.

Final Ideas

And if you want to splurge a bit, try browsing at a bookstore, seeing a movie, attending a concert, or investing in essential oils, candles, plush towels, or blankets – whatever feels decadent TO YOU. If you have more time, take yourself somewhere you love. A trip to the mountains is always one of my best rewards.

Reward that inner child who might feel nervous and scared. Let them know they are totally safe and you haven’t forgotten them. If you have a favorite non-food celebration to mark your baby steps, please share them with our readers below.

Featured

Expert Tips for Managing Stress During the Holidays

It’s the time of year when most people find themselves busier than usual. Taking care of extended family. Shopping and attending holiday gatherings. Getting “end of the year” tasks accomplished. And if you’re like me, exploring novelty or learning as much as possible. As a coach with over 25 years of experience, below I provide expert tips for managing stress during the holidays. These tips are set against a backdrop of holiday lights photos from Woodland Park Zoo’s Wildlanterns display for 2023.

One idea for managing stress is to enjoy the Wildlanterns display at Woodland Park Zoo. Movement, festivities, fresh air, novelty - what could be better? — One idea for managing stress is to enjoy the Wildlanterns display at Woodland Park Zoo. Movement, festivities, fresh air, novelty – what could be better?

Prioritizing and Simplifying Holiday Tasks

If you wanted to, you could probably do something unique every day between now and New Year’s. And pay the price. Instead, figure out what’s most important to you. When shopping, think about what gifts you really need to buy and which you can put on a “perhaps” list. Plan meals ahead of time for those stretches when you’re crunched for time. Here are some additional tips to make things less stressful:

Make a list of the most important things you need to do and focus on those first.
For gifts, consider buying online to save time or choosing gift cards.
Keep meals simple. Choose recipes that are easy and include ingredients you always have on hand.
Double recipes so you have leftovers for multiple meals.
Think about which holiday traditions are the most fun and meaningful. You don’t have to do everything. Just pick a few favorites.

This year's lights display featured bugs, spiders, pandas, and birds, with "snow" and "fantasy" paths as well. A plus: continuous corridors of lights. — This year’s lights display featured bugs, spiders, pandas, and birds, with “snow” and “fantasy” paths as well. A plus: continuous corridors of lights.

Coach Court’s Favorites

One tradition I’ve had for over a decade is visiting Woodland Park Zoo’s light display. Wildlanterns replaced the popular Wildlights five or six years ago. This past week I visited on Thursday evening. It was a dark and stormy night… The precipitation actually provided nice reflections on wet pavement.

My other includes enjoying holiday music. A client of mine invites me to several of her choral performances each year and I thoroughly enjoyed them. I’ve added the Choir of the Sound holiday performance to my “must-do” list, even if I go alone.

Incorporating Physical Activity

Staying active is especially important during stressful holidays. Exercise helps reduce stress and helps you avoid adding extra pounds. Here are some ways to fit movement into a busy schedule:

Try quick workouts at home. If you can’t find 30-60 minutes, try several 5-minute workouts. You can find short exercise videos online.
Take a brisk walk in the morning or after dinner. It’s a great way to clear your mind and increase movement.
Use the stairs instead of the elevator.
Park several blocks from work or in a far parking spot to encourage more movement.
Do stretching or yoga before bed. It can help you relax and sleep better.
Coach Court’s favorite: Movement is my best way of managing stress. Try walking or biking to do local errands. If I have to go anywhere under a mile from my home (including stores, library, and post office), I visit on foot. Often carrying a pack.

Remember, you don’t need long blocks of time to exercise. Give yourself permission to break up workouts if you need to. Even small changes can help lower stress and improve your mood. And if you visit Wildlanterns you can add an extra mile to your total.

Festive polar bears grace the snowy "ice crystals" loop. — Festive polar bears grace the snowy “ice crystals” loop.

Managing Stress with Relaxation Techniques

Mindfulness means paying attention to the present moment and not worrying about the past or the future. After all, we live only right now. Here are ways to practice it:

Try breathing exercises. Box breathing can calm your mind within a minute or two.
Meditation is another great option. Sit quietly and focus on your breathing or try a walking meditation where you allow your mind to be still.
Yoga combines exercise with deep breathing and can be relaxing.
Coach Court’s favorite: Forest bathing, even in the rain, is a wonder way to boost spirits immediately.

These techniques can help you feel less stressed, especially during busy times like the holidays.

My favorite Wildlantern was the tiny panda up in the beautiful tree.

Healthy Eating Habits

Making healthy choices during the holidays can be tricky. Here are some strategies to help:

Try to maintain a balanced diet. Include fruits, vegetables, proteins, and whole grains in your meals.
Drink plenty of water. Aim for your body weight in pounds divided by two for your target in ounces.
It’s okay to have a treat but listen to your body. Enjoy every bite and notice how the food smells and tastes.
Coach Court’s favorite: Watch for your ‘satiation sigh.’ This is a deep breath from your body that indicates it’s had enough. When you notice this, stop eating.
Eat slowly and savor your food. Enjoy the taste of your treats without rushing or multitasking. Try saving some for later, as spiders do. You can always have more when you’re legitimately hungry.

One of the crowd pleasers -- and one of the largest displays -- was this enormous spider on its web. It moves and changes colors. — One of the crowd pleasers — and one of the largest displays — was this enormous spider on its web. It moves *and* changes colors.

You can enjoy your favorite holiday foods without overdoing it. Moderation is key. By staying healthy and feeling good during the holiday season, you’ll be raring to go come January.

Managing Stress: Just Say No

Set personal limits on what you can get done during the holidays. You don’t have to say ‘yes’ to everything. Here’s how to set appropriate boundaries and say no when you need to:

Be clear about what you can handle. Don’t take on too much.
Use your “no” muscles. If someone asks you to do something extra, and you’re too busy, it’s fine to tell them you can’t.
Be polite but firm. You can say something like, “That sounds fun, but I have a lot on my plate right now.”
Remember, make self-care your top priority. You’ll enjoy the holidays more if you’re not stressed.
Coach Court’s favorite: Think about the pros and cons of the activity. If the pros outweigh the cons, figure out a way to include it but then remove something else from your list.

By setting realistic expectations and saying no when necessary, you can keep stress levels down and have a happier holiday season.

Takeaways for a Stress-Free Holiday

To wrap up, remember these key points for a more enjoyable and less stressful holiday season:

Prioritize and simplify your tasks. Focus on what matters most.
Stay active, even in short doses, to reduce stress.
Practice mindfulness and relaxation techniques to keep calm.
Eat healthily, enjoy treats mindfully, and listen for your body’s signals that it’s had enough.
Set appropriate boundaries and know it’s okay to say no.

Try these strategies during the holidays. They can help you manage stress and make this time of year more fun and enjoyable. If you have favorite ways for managing stress this time of year, please share in the comments.

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November Challenge: Craft Your Own Compelling Project

If you knew me between 2012 and 2021, you may remember my fondness for NaNoWriMo. National Novel Writing Month occurs every November. It is a compelling challenge to writers to crank out 50,000 words on their current WIP (work in progress) between 12:01 on November 1 and 11:59 on November 30. I’ve participated six times. However, since I’m between fiction projects this year, I thought about other ways to develop a November challenge.

Where I do most of my blogging, writing, and program creation. You can see by the number of books behind me that I ADORE Books!

Challenge History

I have a long history of creating challenges. In 2021 I created OcTraPiMo (October Trash Pick-up Month). My challenge was to pick up trash around the community each day and share my results with readers.

In November 2022 I created NoCluHoMo with the intention of reducing clutter around my home.

In January 2023, I created the AAA (Active Ajax Adventures) project involving 52 rambles (covering 320 miles together) to unique green spaces without any duplicates. You could say the creative child in me likes to be challenged periodically. These projects are my way of satisfying both needs.

Mt. Rainier as viewed from Dirty Harry's Peak. Ajax and I have easily covered over 11,000 miles together in his 8.5 years with me. — Mt. Rainier as viewed from Dirty Harry’s Peak. Ajax and I have easily covered over 11,000 miles together in his 8.5 years with me.

A New November Challenge Is Born

As October reached an end, memories of NaNoWriMo beckoned. I played around with the Latin root “nov” (meaning new). What about innovation? Launching a new company is certainly innovative, but I wanted something restorative, not stressful.

How about renovating some areas of our house? We did an extensive home remodel eighteen years ago and have zero desire to repeat that stress. Could I do something with the words novice, novelty, or novel reading (not writing?)

The cone of shame. This shot was a November photograph from 2017 in between long, intense novel writing stretches.

Taking a Test Drive

On October 30, I took a trial run with “novelty.” I sent several messages to friends I’ve lost touch with over the past year and was pleasantly surprised when I received warm replies.

I’ve done plenty of letter-writing challenges before, sending notes to my parents in celebration of anniversaries or birthdays, the number of correspondences matching the number of years. Been there, done that. What else might I try?

On October 31, I chose a different path. I started a pork shoulder in the Dutch oven first thing in the morning to guarantee I had protein for the week. Yum. Cooking requires time I can’t really spare this month, so trying a new recipe every day wouldn’t work. But what if I simply did something new each day?

A November challenge could be food-related. One of the fun things I like to do is decorate food. Here, fresh tasty treats with a Halloween theme, no added sugar.

Kicking Off My November Challenge

On the first day of November, rather than driving an hour to the mountains (as originally planned), I headed to Magnuson Park with Ajax. Our target was looking for a snow bunting, a rarity I had only seen once before. I don’t do much birding in the fall, mainly because the only birds available are residents. We recorded 23 bird species, no bunting, but plenty of waterfowl!

Thursday morning, I went outside in the rain in the dark to do a few of my physical therapy exercises while grounding at the same time. Friday I generated a possible script for a video using assistance from Chat GPT. On Saturday, my daughter and I visited Hobby Lobby for holiday crafting supplies. And today I’m enjoying reading a graphic memoir, Kid Gloves. My “novelty” November challenge is off to a good start.

Magnuson Park waterfront on November 1, 2023 to kick off my novelty November challenge. No rain!

Creating Your Own November Challenge

Now it’s your turn. How might you insert some novelty into your life? Can you come up with ways to manage your stress, embrace change, and tap into your creativity this month?

Here are eleven ideas (November is, after all, the eleventh month of the year!) to get you started. They all begin with the letters “N-O” and can be done in November without investing significant resources.

Challenge Ideas 1-5

No: Just say no to something you really don’t want to do. Put yourself first.

No Negativity: Consciously avoid negative self-talk and pessimistic thoughts.

Nocturnal Walk: Enjoy the crisp night air with an evening walk, embracing the tranquility and freshness. We set the clocks back an hour so we have more night darkness to deal with. Enjoy it!

Nomad Day: Spend a day exploring a part of your community you don’t usually visit. Notice and name whatever captures your attention. You may discover a part of yourself that goes underappreciated!

Nonchalant Attitude: Adopt a carefree approach towards minor setbacks. Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I write down a few wins from the current or previous day to remind myself that yes, I AM moving forward. (You may recall this practice from The Gap and The Gain.)

The peaceful calm of Lake Washington was exactly what I needed on November 1 instead of a long drive in the car!

Challenge Ideas 6-11

Nonjudgmental Listening: Practice listening to loved ones, friends, and colleagues with love, not judgment.

Notes of Appreciation: Write thank-you notes or express gratitude to loved ones.

Notice Nature: Spend time observing the subtle changes in nature as we approach winter.

Nourish Your Body: Focus on eating with awareness and appreciation for all the wonderful things your unique body can do.

Novel Reading: Escape into a fictional world by enjoying a book in a genre you don’t usually read.

Now: What have you been putting off that you could tackle today? Can you spend five minutes on it? What one thing can you prioritize for November so you stop feeling overwhelmed?

Fabulous colors abound in the Puget Sound right now. Go on a color -collecting walk — Fabulous colors abound in the Puget Sound right now. Go on a color-collecting walk.

November Challenge Takeaways

Which ideas resonate with you? How might you create your own self-supported and motivating challenge for the next few weeks?

Whatever you choose to focus on, have a way to track your “wins” whether that is reflecting on your day and noting what you did that was new or required a beginner’s mindset.

A "notice and name" mushroom I discovered during our birding trip to Houston and South Padre Island in November 2022, a "novelty" event for sure, traveling without our daughter. — A “notice and name” mushroom I discovered during our birding trip to Houston and South Padre Island in November 2022, a “novelty” event for sure, traveling without our daughter.

Periodically review what’s working for you so that you can adjust your challenge to serve you.

Share your results in the comments so that others can benefit from our collected wisdom. Good luck with your novelty November!

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Gratitude Practice: How To Cultivate Your Unique Habit

As November approaches, it’s the perfect time to practice gratitude. Establishing such an approach is a great way to appreciate life’s blessings. In this post, we’ll introduce you to how to create your own unique gratitude practice. One that resonates with your lifestyle and transforms your perspective. For previous blog posts about gratitude, see How to Practice Gratitude to Get Unstuck and How to Play Your Way to Gratitude.

One gratitude practice I have is shooting a photo of something that catches my eye. I am grateful for colors, for vision, for people who enjoy seasonally decorating their homes, for walks with my dog, and for dry weather.

Transcend Judgment through Gratitude

A wise author, Dain Heer, reminds us in his book, Body Whispering, that we cannot be in judgment and gratitude at the same time. Are you often harsh toward yourself? If so, perhaps it’s time to notice when that inner critic takes over. Harsh judgment often leads to a spiral of negativity. According to Heer, the antidote is replacing judgment with appreciation.

Instead of feeling unhappy about your (insert body part here), shift your focus to being thankful for the many tasks that part helps you perform. This transition from a judgmental mindset to one of gratitude can improve your outlook and help you develop a more positive self-image.

Instead of complaining about the downpour, I chose to be grateful for roofs, umbrellas, and rain jackets. We take so many simple luxuries for granted until they are no longer there. Watching the survival series, "Alone", has given me an immense appreciation for having food on my plate rather than sedges, worms, or nothing at all. — Instead of complaining about the downpour, I chose to be grateful for roofs, umbrellas, and rain jackets. We take so many simple luxuries for granted until they are no longer there. Watching the survival series, “Alone”, has given me an immense appreciation for having food on my plate rather than sedges, worms, or nothing at all.

If you notice yourself being overly critical, stop. See if you can discover something positive about the situation. What we seek we will find. If we always look for the negative, we will find negativity. By training our brains to look for the positives, we reinforce that skill set and build the mental muscles that can help us feel better.

Gratitude Practice: Mutual Exchange

Sharing gratitude can amplify their positive effects. Consider exchanging gratitude with a friend or loved one. This can create a mutual appreciation for life’s blessings.

One way I do this is by exchanging gratitude with my mother in North Carolina. This Sunday afternoon ritual not only enriches our personal gratitude practice but also strengthens our family bond.

When I hike in the mountains, on the trip back to the car I often find myself calling out all the things I'm grateful for during the outing, from the weather, to my companion Ajax, to the beautiful mushrooms poking out to say hi. — When I hike in the mountains, on the trip back to the car I often find myself calling out all the things I’m grateful for during the outing, from the weather, to my companion Ajax, to the beautiful mushrooms poking out to say hi.

The other family gratitude practice we have includes sharing highlights of our day while eating dinner. We have been doing this as a family for about a decade. Some days it’s hard to come up with anything, but we always can say we’re grateful for the food in front of us and for each other’s company.

Cultivate a “Choice,” not “Should,” Mindset

For a gratitude practice to be effective, it must be something you look forward to. Not an obligation to check off your to-do list. See whether you can change from a “should” mentality to a “choice” mentality.

See if you can find tiny pockets of time where you are relaxed, maybe even happy. Use 1-2 minutes to think about a positive moment in your day. You have the beginnings of a gratitude practice!

This photo brought a smile to my face and a flood of memories of our second visit to New Zealand where we visited a wallaby petting center two days after Christmas, 2019. So grateful for vacations, for photographs, for memories.

At night before you go to bed, jot down three things that went well. They can be small, such as noticing a double rainbow. Or they might be big, such as launching a new website or celebrating a promotion. Doing so gives your subconscious positive statements to reflect on overnight. In turn, this can help you start a new day feeling positive.

Gratitude Practice: Diverse Ideas

Gratitude practices are not one-size-fits-all. They can take numerous forms based on your unique preferences. Here are a few ideas to get you started.

Reflect Daily – Take a few minutes each day, perhaps in the morning or before bed, to reflect on what you’re grateful for. It can be helpful to center your thoughts on positive experiences, people in your life, or even simple pleasures.
Keep a Gratitude Journal – Jot down things you’re thankful for each day. This helps you foster a mindset of appreciation. It also creates a record of positive experiences you can reflect upon later.

The care and attention that went into this tiny planter box is evident, with the five-toe stones next to appropriately sized plants. What can you find that makes you smile?

Express Gratitude to Others: Send a simple thank you or a note of appreciation. Do something kind for someone. Expressing gratitude enhances your relationships and spreads positivity.
Cultivate Mindfulness – Being present and mindful can help you appreciate tiny moments. Look for the aspects of your life that bring you joy.
Keep a Gratitude Jar – Keep a container where family members can store notes of gratitude. Over time, you will fill the jar with reminders of good moments, which you can reflect on together.

Review Your Gratitude Journey

Creating a unique gratitude practice is a journey of self-exploration and appreciating life’s rich offerings. In addition, a periodic review of your gratitude can provide insight into your personal growth. It’s inspiring to see how your appreciation evolves over time.

As we approach November, we can make a conscious effort to replace judgment with appreciation. Share thankful moments with loved ones. Embrace a joyful approach to our practice. Explore diverse gratitude expressions. And reflect on our gratitude journey. Through these steps, we enrich our lives and create ripples of positivity that can spread to those around us.

So many gratitudes come to mind with this image. Gratitude for family, for travel, for creativity. For the time my daughter and her grandparents could spend together this fall. And for air travel which makes it possible to visit loved ones across the country.

If you have a unique gratitude practice you’d like to share, please do so in the comments. Your comments contribute to the shared community of understanding. Plus I love hearing from readers!

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How to Use Journal Prompts to Embrace Autumn Change

This week provided a deep dive into furthering my education. Self-study material for becoming an NBC-HWC (National Board-Certified Health and Wellness Coach). Enrollment in a course called The Art of Journal Coaching. Precision Nutrition’s 8-week course about Chat GPT. Learning about lymph and fluid flow and the power of the tongue from the Tongue Mojo expert at Stop Chasing Pain. Although my daughter is enrolled at the University of WA, each fall I, too, evolve through learning. This week I merged all of my current interests into a post featuring 20 autumn journal prompts meant to inspire reflection on change.

Change is in the air. Use some of the journal prompts from this post to reflect on what change means to you.

Journal Prompts 1-5: Observe Nature’s Changes

As we head deeper into autumn, signs all around us point to change. Falling leaves. Shorter days. Dropping temperatures. Returning rain. Migrating birds. What are some of your favorite signs of change? What does autumn mean for you? To guide and inspire you, here are some journal prompts around observing nature’s changes.

Reflect on the transformation of green leaves to vibrant reds, oranges, and yellows. How does this mirror change in your own life?
Write about a tree that loses its leaves every fall. How does it prepare for winter and what can you learn from its cycle?

This image evokes both the return to school and the changing seasons. One of my favorite local trees.

Reflect on the crispness of the autumn air. How does the change in temperature make you feel?
Write about your favorite autumn scent, be it cinnamon, burning wood, or damp earth. How does it evoke memories or emotions?
Reflect on the sounds of fall, from rustling leaves to distant geese. How do these sounds shape your autumn experience?

Autumn Prompts 6-10: Embrace Personal Growth

If you’ve followed my blog for a while, you know that every so often I stop to pause and reflect on where I’ve come and where I’m heading. While many people do this at the change of the calendar year, I also do it at the start of each school season. There is no better time than the present to stop and think about where you’re headed. Enjoy some journal prompts around personal growth.

Write about a personal challenge you faced this year. How can you see it in a new light, inspired by the changing seasons?
Reflect on the concept of “harvest.” What have you sown and reaped in your personal or professional life?
Write about a time you felt like a lone leaf, drifting away from its tree. What did you learn from that experience?

A photo from a trip to Melakwa Lake in the fall of 2022.

Reflect on the shorter days and longer nights. How can you make the most of your time, even when it feels limited?
Write about a past autumn when you experienced significant change. How did you adapt and grow?

Journal Prompts 11-15: Beauty and Impermanence

When life feels chaotic and out of control, taking a walk around the block or visiting a nearby park can provide substantial restorative benefits. Last week I shared a recent experience with forest bathing. This week I provide prompts for you to reflect on what nature means to you. How might you enrich your relationship with yourself — and with nature? Below are prompts on appreciating beauty and impermanence.

Reflect on the beauty of a decaying leaf. How can you find beauty in imperfections or endings in your life?
Write about a memorable autumn sunset you witnessed. What feelings did it evoke?
Reflect on the fleeting nature of fall foliage. How does it remind you to cherish moments and phases in life?

Fungus on a decaying nurse log covered in moss. What can you notice in your local green space?

Write about a forest or park in autumn. How do the varying colors and stages of trees inspire you?
Reflect on a rainy autumn day. How does the rain rejuvenate the earth, and how can challenges rejuvenate you?

Prompts 16-20: Prepare for the Future

Finally, once you have reflected on today, imagine what you want your future to look like. Picture yourself ten years from now, living an ideal day. Where are you? Who is with you? What are you doing? Precision Nutrition coaches refer to this exercise as the Destination Postcard. The more vivid the details you supply, the more likely your brain is to help you reach it. Consider the following prompts in preparing for the future.

Write about the animals preparing for winter. How can you prepare for future challenges or seasons in your life?
Reflect on the balance between letting go (like trees shedding leaves) and holding on. When is it time for each in your life?
Write about the warmth of a cozy sweater or electric blanket. How can you create warmth and comfort in your life as the days get colder?

Consider your life as varied and colorful as Mother Nature's landscape. Everything provides balance until one color takes over. What do you need in order to restore balance in your life? — Consider your life as varied and colorful as Mother Nature’s landscape. Everything provides balance until one color takes over. What do you need in order to restore balance in your life?

Reflect on the anticipation of the first snowfall. How can you embrace the unknowns in your life with similar anticipation?
Write about a family or community autumn tradition. How does it bring people together and how can you foster such connections in your life?

Using Journal Prompts in Your Practice

Allow these prompts to inspire you to see the beauty of autumn and draw parallels with your own experiences. If you feel pressed for time, consider picking one prompt that speaks to you, to begin with. Set an alarm for anywhere from 2-5 minutes and jot down everything that comes to mind. The next time you have a few minutes, pick another prompt.

A favorite fall image from a hike on Tiger Mountain.

Don’t feel compelled to write about them all, unless you love journaling. When I get stuck journaling I love to have a prompt or two available to channel thoughts in a new direction. And you can do this in a natural setting (nature journaling), on a computer, or even dictated. Whatever works for you.

Happy reflecting! And if you care to share, please do so in the box below. I love hearing from readers.

Featured

Forest Bathing: How To Get Started

Before I share my recent experience with forest bathing, I wish to extend deep gratitude to Chloe Lee, affiliated with Cascadia Forest Therapy. She first introduced me to the practice in March 2021. Chloe has a unique and deeply personal way of extending “Invitations” to enjoy the forest.

Last Tuesday, she invited me to join her on a guided walk in the Arboretum. During our two hours, she asked me several questions about my own practice which I thought would make a good introductory blog post. Any errors herein are mine alone.

Forest bathing doesn't require any water, although we had plenty of rain on October 10. It made everything magical. — Forest bathing doesn’t require any water, although we had plenty of rain on October 10. It made everything magical.

What Is Forest Bathing?

Put most simply, forest bathing, or shinrin-yoku, is the Japanese practice of self-care and mindfulness that involves opening your senses to all the forest has to offer, from noticing movement, seeking tiny objects, experiencing colors in new ways, or finding a place to sit and absorb whatever Mother Nature offers.

If after reading this post you’re interested in learning more, please visit Cascadia Forest Therapy’s article on a “Typical Forest Bathing Session” or scroll down for some wonderful resources I found on my shelf.

A damp heart-shaped leaf that reminded me of my mother. While use of cell phones is discouraged on traditional forest bathing walks, I knew I would ultimately want to share this wonderful experience with readers. — A damp heart-shaped leaf that reminded me of my mother. While the use of cell phones is discouraged on traditional forest bathing walks, I knew I would ultimately want to share this wonderful experience with readers. Instead of several dozen photos, I only shot five.

The Beginnings Of My Journey

In March 2021, I needed helpful ways to handle stress rather than sinking into addictive tendencies. Chloe introduced me to the calm, centering practice of forest bathing. During our walk this week, she asked me to share an early forest bathing memory.

I recounted my first time in Boeing Creek Park, a place I’ve returned to many times since. At her invitation to find something that “spoke” to me in some way, I crept up to the biggest Douglas fir in the area. I caressed the ribbed bark, circled around the trunk examining woodpecker holes and moss covering it, and looked up as the tree sighed on the breeze.

Be-a-Tree

Assigning the tree a human name didn’t feel right. I intuitively thought of it as female, but I admit I don’t know whether trees can even be male or female. So I refer to the tree simply as “Be-a-tree.” (Beatrice?) I gave Be-a-tree a hug, stared up into its high and mighty branches dwarfing all those in its presence, and felt deeply connected to a tree in a way I never had before. Almost like the tree was a grandparent. Or great-grandparent.

Am I a tree hugger? That particular one, yes.

A madrone reaching high up in the canopy of the Arboretum.

Every time I return to the park, I include a short visit to Be-a-tree. Oh, the many fascinating years it has experienced. And it will probably be standing long after I move on. Appreciating nature’s longevity and healing powers helps put things into proper perspective. It’s hard to be depressed or manic while surrounded by trees.

Have you ever connected with a tree? If you are interested in learning more about the hidden lives of trees, check out Peter Wohlleben’s book.

Sit Spot

Chloe extended another invitation in a grove where a barred owl hooted a greeting. She suggested we find a spot to lean up against a tree and absorb whatever Mother Nature wanted to reveal. This time I found a Madrone with peeling bark. Since I seldom visit the Arboretum, and probably couldn’t locate this one again, I did not feel a need to name it. However, I did notice the lovely, thin, tissue-paper bark.

In our tea circle, I shared that Mother Nature had wrapped up the tree, almost as a present. Have I mentioned that I love trees?

Integrating Practice with an Urban Lifestyle

A question we discussed in a group and in smaller groups was how to include a forest bathing practice in an urban setting. My own practice looks like this:

Daily walks (3-4) outdoors with my dog, rain or shine
Daily grounding (earthing) in my backyard, 30 minutes
Weekly hikes with my dog
Birding seasonally, sometimes monthly
Forest bathing as the opportunity arises, no set frequency but more often in spring
Vacations 2x/year to wildlife destinations for bird and animal photography
My Active Ajax Adventures Rambles and OcTraPiMo projects, both outdoors-based projects

One of my favorite things to do outside is to appreciate the changing seasons. My favorite colors occur in the fall.

As you can see, even living in an urban setting like Seattle, I have carved out regular practices that take me out in nature to help me stay grounded, connected, and less stressed. You can, too, by making it a priority and finding ways that work for you.

Developing Your Practice

If you are interested in trying forest bathing for yourself, you can embark on a guided trip to see what the invitations and practice look, feel, and sound like.

Once you have had a taste for it, plan a few visits to your nearest greenspace, preferably a place with trees. Go alone, without any set objective of time or distance. Your goal is simply to BE and FEEL. Motion can come later once you tap into emotions.

Use all five senses. Can you find ten different sights that appeal to your eyes? a certain color? something bigger than a bicycle, smaller than a penny? What do you hear? When you walk, how do you feel? how does it feel to rub your feet along the surface or skim the top with your hand? Are there distinct smells?

Oh, to be so lucky on your forest bathing adventures as to find a handful of ripe blueberries!

Perhaps the hardest sense to use during forest bathing is taste. I don’t advocate trying mushrooms, as I don’t know which might be poisonous, but when berries are ripe or apples are in season, go for it. We enjoyed 100% cacao and freshly brewed forest tea with cedar, cinnamon, and nettle Chloe picked during our hike.

Where Can I Learn More About Forest Bathing?

Forest Bathing Retreat: Find Wholeness in the Company of Trees, by Hanna Fries
Wild Calm: A Guided Journal, Finding Mindfulness in Forest Bathing by Joan Vorderbruggen
The Joy of Forest Bathing by Melanie Choukas
The Healing Nature Trail by Tamarack Song
And just for fun, Forest Bathing with Your Dog by Nadine Mazzola

I used forest bathing techniques on a hike with Ajax in March, 2021 on one of our favorite trails on Tiger Mountain.

If you are interested in contacting Chloe Lee directly, here are her personals:

www.chloejanelee.com

hello@chloejanelee.com

www.cascadiaforesttherapy.com

Instagram @chloe_jane_lee

Now go outside, find a tree to admire and learn about for the next five minutes, and tell it Chloe, Court, and Be-A-Tree sent you!

Featured

Granite Mountain: October Balm For the Spirit

To celebrate the change of seasons, this week Ajax and I participated in our annual pilgrimage to the summit of Granite Mountain. In 2020, Ajax overheated on the descent. We changed tactics in 2021 but the muggy, buggy, and smoky outing dowsed my interest in hiking it during the summer. The exposed south-facing slope — an avalanche chute in winter — is too brutal for Ajax in the heat. On October 5, 2022, we enjoyed cooler temperatures, an empty trail, and brilliant fall colors. And on the same day this year, the Cascade Mountains once again stunned us with their beauty.

At every turn, we found more to gawk at and photograph. The mountains are calling and we had to go.

Getting Started

In previous posts, I have shared how sometimes I have to get myself to a trailhead before I actually feel like hiking. This time, I couldn’t wait to reach the trail. A recent trip report raved about spectacular fall colors and I knew exactly where Ajax and I would go.

Fire-red dew-covered maple leaves, the first shot of the hike. My jaw just about dropped.

On the drive to Exit 47, four things set this trip apart from others.

We stopped to fill up with gas in the dark so I wouldn’t run out of gas 45 miles from Seattle
I listened to Il Divo’s Mama for the first fifteen minutes — which repeated in my head for most of the hike (yes, mine is still with us; not so my husband’s)
For the rest of the drive, I listened to Richard Schwartz’s audiobook, No Bad Parts. It reminded me of the blog post I wrote some time ago about reigning in our inner critic.
Through morning mist and fog, splashes of color hinted at the display to come higher up

By the time we reached the parking lot just after dawn, I had my camera all ready to go.

Balm for the soul: Mother Nature's awesome artistic display against Mt. Rainier at Granite Mountain. — Balm for the soul: Mother Nature’s awesome artistic display against Mt. Rainier at Granite Mountain.

Granite Mountain: Ascent and Discovery

We started hiking around 7:20, with only one other hiker in front of us. When a spider web brushed my face just past the Pratt Lake/Granite Mountain junction, I guessed the other hiker must have headed in the opposite direction. At the avalanche chute, colorful shrubs awaited. And at every switchback, more stunning scenery vied for my attention. By the end of the morning, I’d shot over 200 photos.

Unfortunately, the beauty couldn’t mask a growing ache in my left foot. Right between the second and third metatarsal, I felt a nodule or tender spot that made me want to scrunch my toes or roll onto the outside of my foot to avoid the ball of the foot. It posed no problems on dirt, but the irregular rocks through the chute aggravated it.

Peek-a-boo! Ajax pauses for just the right moment behind flame-red bushes. Jaw-dropping balm for the soul.

Since I usually don’t feel problems with my Keen boots until descending, I worried about continuing. Each half-hour, I stopped to give Ajax some water and tweak my laces. Take note: the next time you have issues with your boots, try removing your liners. As it turns out, a matted clump of pine needles under the left arch support caused the issue. I guess I’m the proverbial “princess and the pine” rather than pea!

Solo Summit

At 10:15 we enjoyed a half hour at the summit of Granite Mountain. Snow geese in the hundreds migrating southeast squawked high overhead in shifting V formations. A lone hawk soared lazily on an updraft. Hornets (or wasps?) hovered above Ajax’s food and water container, bothered little by a light breeze that kept the other bugs away. I scanned the meadow below looking for other hikers but we had the place to ourselves.

I surveyed the mountains as though they were my own backyard. Due east, a thick marine fog layer blanketed the Puget Sound. All around us were our friends. Bandera. The Tooth. Washington. Defiance. Snoqualmie. McClellan Butte. Not a single cloud other than those below our feet. And stunning reds, golds, oranges, and yellows in all the west-facing valleys illuminated by the sun. Calm confidence washed over me. This is a peaceful world I know so well.

While Granite Mountain is still draped in reds, golds, and oranges, Adams, Rainiern and Glacier Peak all have a healthy dose of snow above 10,000' elevation. — While Granite Mountain is still draped in reds, golds, and oranges, Adams, Rainier, and Glacier Peak all have a healthy dose of snow above 10,000′ elevation.

The only thing that could have made it better was to be able to talk about it with Ajax. What was he thinking, as he sat nearby, panting? Did he appreciate the warm sun or was it too much for him? He wouldn’t eat any kibble. Nor did he chase the chipmunk that approached my pack looking for handouts. But once I put on my pack, he trotted over, ready to go.

Descent from Granite Mountain

As with any early start on a beautiful day, the silence broke as soon as we left the summit basin. Fortunately, the hikers we passed as we descended were spaced out over the next few hours. In addition to Granite Mountain, the trailhead allows access to Pratt, Rainbow, Island, Talapus, and Olallie Lakes. So while the parking lot was full, we didn’t see everyone using it.

Ajax takes a rest beneath the summit. My beautiful puppa is so photogenic, not to mention patient. — Ajax rests beneath the Granite Mountain summit. My beautiful pup is so photogenic, not to mention patient.

The days are once again getting shorter. Rain is common in the Pacific Northwest the last three months of the year, so I know we’re on borrowed time. I knew if we didn’t get out during the week, we might not have another chance. A climber once commented, “If I’m not a little cold, hungry, or tired at the end of a trip, then I brought too much stuff.” As tempted as I was to cut corners, I’m not that climber. I like being comfortable and having sufficient supplies for the two of us.

Balm for the soul: Ajax enjoys sniffing picas, chipmunks, and squirrels in the meadow beneath Granite Mountain's summit. — Balm for the soul: Ajax enjoys sniffing picas, chipmunks, and squirrels in the meadow beneath Granite Mountain’s summit.

Do you have a favorite peak you visit every year? Mine used to be Mt. St. Helens, but the permit hassle has meant changing my goals. Now, Granite in October has become the perfect balm for the spirit. I can’t wait to visit again next fall.

Featured

Protein Needs: How to Assess Whether You Get Enough

A question Body Results clients frequently ask is, “What should I eat?” followed closely by “How much?” Just as no two people have matching fingerprints, our dietary preferences, carbohydrate, fat, and protein needs, and programs differ as well. This week we look at how to assess your unique protein needs with helpful input from my nutrition certifying organization, Precision Nutrition.

Tubac Jack's in Arizona. Even when I am out birding, I can always find someplace that will help me fulfill my protein needs. — Tubac Jack’s in Arizona. Even when I am out birding, I can always find someplace that will help me fulfill my protein needs.

Protein’s Bad Rap

Twenty-five years ago, there was plenty of skepticism about protein. After all, bodybuilders ate lots of it—but they also experimented with all kinds of “questionable” things.

In the late 1990s low-fat diets took center stage (we all know how disastrous that was) and high-protein diets grew in popularity for weight loss—an approach health experts labeled as “unsafe” back then.

Over the years, the hand-wringing about protein has faded. Some of those same experts now advise people to “eat more protein.”

But one claim just won’t die: “Protein is bad for your kidneys.”

Tsui Sushi is one of our very favorite places to go to meet our protein needs -- sashimi and sushi -- with a good dose of omega 3's, the healthy type of fat. Makes me hungry every time! — Tsui Sushi is one of our very favorite places to go to meet our protein needs — sashimi and sushi — with a good dose of omega 3’s, the healthy type of fat. Makes me hungry every time!

Spoiler: It’s a Myth

The concern about high protein and kidney problems began because doctors tell people with poorly functioning kidneys—usually from pre-existing kidney disease—to eat a low-protein diet.

There’s a big difference between avoiding protein because your kidneys are already damaged versus protein actively damaging healthy kidneys.

It’s the difference between jogging with a broken leg and jogging with a perfectly healthy leg.

Recovering from injury, illness, or surgery will mean increased protein needs.

Jogging with a Broken Leg is a Bad Idea

Doctors would probably tell you not to do that. But nobody would ever argue that jogging causes legs to break. Same with protein and kidneys.

Eating more protein does increase how much your kidneys have to work, just like jogging increases how much your legs have to work.

But protein hasn’t been shown to cause kidney damage—again, just like jogging isn’t going to suddenly snap your leg like a breadstick.

In fact, clinical studies show people can eat up to 4.4 g of protein per kg body weight (or 2 g per pound) without any short-term health problems. But very few people would ever voluntarily eat that much.

The author in my younger days, sporting a casted right leg and holding our previous dog, Emily.

So How Do I Determine My Protein Needs?

For the average person eating a standard diet, protein deficiency isn’t a concern. However, “not deficient” does not mean optimal. It just means getting enough to maintain function and prevent malnutrition.

For sedentary, generally healthy adults, 0.4 g per pound of body weight should cover basic daily requirements. (A little math here: 40 grams for a 100-pound person, 60 grams for a 150-pound person, and 80 grams for a 200-pound person.)

The more active you are, the more protein you need. The author stands atop Mt. Washburn in Yellowstone National Park.

Our bodies need protein for so many essential processes that your protein needs increase if you are:

Training hard frequently or doing a lot of physical labor (think backpacking, trekking, or climbing)
Trying to maintain or increase lean muscle mass while decreasing body fat
Older (protein digestion reduces with age, so you need more to meet daily requirements)
Injured, sick, or recovering from surgery

For people in one or more of these groups, research suggests aiming for 0.7-1.0 g per pound of body weight (or about 105-150 g for a 150-pound person.)

A delicious chicken salad at Tubac Jack's — A delicious chicken salad at Tubac Jack’s.

Don’t Agonize Over the Numbers

Many people avoid calorie counting, tracking intake, and measuring food. If the thought of tracking intake makes you cringe, you might love learning about an easier way.

Click here for a helpful Precision Nutrition infographic on what a “serving” looks like using your own hand. Shoot for having 1-2 palm-sized portions of protein at each meal.

Also, please remember that you won’t reach your protein needs goal overnight. Start by nudging the notch one step better. If you currently only get one palm-sized position of protein a day, try increasing that to two. Once you can do that consistently, build to three.

A homemade protein-rich lunch of leftovers: tomato, pulled pork, raw veggies (peppers, celery, carrots, water chestnuts), and roasted potatoes cooked in avocado oil and sea salt. Delicious.

This might be as simple as increasing your breakfast egg scramble from two to three, adding a scoop of collagen to a protein shake or post-workout smoothie, or adding a wing or two to the chicken thigh you routinely eat at lunch. If you get most of your protein at dinner, try adding a palm-sized serving to breakfast or lunch.

Try it out for a few weeks. If you enjoy it, you feel it’s helping you approach your goals, and you’re seeing improved performance, then keep building on your success. And if you need help planning your way forward, contact me. I’m always happy to collaborate!

Featured

How to Use Decisional Balance to Help Make Choices

Saturday morning I wrestled with the pros and cons of hiking. The weather forecasted rain starting around noon. My daughter, who starts her sophomore year at U. of Washington this week, was home for one final weekend. I hadn’t hiked since our birthday trip to Peek-a-Boo Lake. I reflected on resistance and ambivalence and how decisional balance can help us make choices when we face change.

Our 10-mile hike felt like a race against time as a front moved into the mountains. The view is looking due north from the West Tiger 3 summit.

Decisional Balance: Cons

Resistance and ambivalence are normal and expected in the process of change. I tend to focus on obstacles first. If I perceive too many, I avoid the first step, in this case, getting into the car. The roadblocks felt ample:

My daughter was home for the weekend, but she had to work, so I would be hiking alone with Ajax
Hiking half a day meant delaying my weekly blog
We’d get a later start than usual since I hadn’t totally packed
Even in the shoulder season, weekend crowds are still likely on trails
Hiking meant postponing doing my foot and hip rehab exercises
I had no audiobook to listen to on the drive and nobody to talk to

When I listed the cons, I noticed the biggest ones revolved around going alone and prioritizing my time. Then I shifted my thoughts to how I might reframe them into positives.

View toward the east from just east of West Tiger 1, en route to Preston/Bootleg trails. The fall color change has just started!

Decisional Balance: Pros

Reframing is one of the most powerful tools in a coach’s toolbox. It helps us turn negatives into positives. Here’s what I came up with when I tried turning my cons into pros:

I committed to doing a ramble a week with my dog Ajax this year; this would be number 60.
Hiking would supply a topic and photos for a blog post; nobody cares about the timing of launches but me
We could get on the trail by 7:15; the hike I wanted to do never had very many people
I could do my PT later in the evening
Hiking in the morning would mean we’d beat the rain
Birdsong! Need I say more? Fall migrants might present themselves
Enjoying nature is one of the best ways for me to reflect on all the changes in my life
I wanted a memorable way to celebrate finishing the Precision Nutrition Master Health Coach course which is the first stepping stone to becoming a board-certified Health and Wellness Coach with the NBHWC

Ajax celebrates my achievements at the summit of West Tiger 1. I do so love that little guy.

By reframing my list of cons into pros, I could focus on the main reason to hike: to celebrate! If we don’t highlight and enjoy our accomplishments, they get lost in the rush of daily living. I wanted to pause and do something I love, even if it meant delaying other important things.

Assessing Change Readiness

Enter decisional balance, which is a way of weighing the costs and benefits of choices. For simple decisions, we do this intuitively and quickly, usually without writing anything down. But if you have larger life changes you’ve been considering for quite a while, writing the pros and cons on paper might help.

An example of a hard decision is whether to stay at a current job with people you enjoy that provides security and benefits, but which is totally boring, or to switch to a better-paying job in a new industry with a lot to learn and no guarantees. Which direction you choose depends on your values, identity, and priorities.

One of the tipping points for me in decisional balance was seeing the fall colors. October is a beautiful month to enjoy the mountains.

To explore decisions yourself, check out this decisional balance worksheet from Nova Southeastern University, along with an explanation of how to complete it. Precision Nutrition also offers a worksheet called the decision journal.

Bootleg Trail

On our descent, we hit an unexpected obstacle. I’d started composing a blog post in my mind about decisional balance and stopped paying attention to the trail. When we reached a turnstile with a sign for the Bootleg Trail, I stopped in my tracks.

Crud! How did we get on the wrong trail?

The overgrown entry into the forest east of all the logged areas is marked with a small rock cairn and faded pink ribbon on two bushes. The detour beneath the deforested boundary is not marked except by faded blue arrows on the uphill trees.

We weren’t exactly lost. I’d been on this stretch during prior exploratory rambles. But we were too far east. My attempt to access a map showing whether the Tiger Mountain Trail or Railroad Grade route crossed nearby failed. Drat Mint Mobile!

Oh well, I thought, what’s another mile? As we did on Squak, we retraced our steps. Fortunately, I found the bypass trail with faint blue arrows pointing west. Aha! Back on track.

Lessons Learned

I certainly didn’t expect to see Bootleg Trail yesterday. Nor did I anticipate my hesitancy to launch the wellness coaching branch of our company. As in all aspects of life, sometimes our experiences and expectations don’t match.

Yet mistakes are great teachers. And when we make mistakes and say “Oh well, no big deal,” or better yet, “What can I learn from this?” we advance toward cultivating a growth mindset.

It's mushroom season! — It’s mushroom season!

Once we reached a trail I recognized, I reflected on the past twenty weeks of coaching classes. I also reminded myself of my intention to continue the forward momentum I’d built all summer. On our way down the Cable Line trail to our car, I shot some videos introducing Webtraining. My first step toward getting less awkward in front of the camera is to take more video selfies while on hikes. I got this!

In the end, my decision to hike yesterday was the best one I could have made. As soon as we got home, it started to pour. The forecast for the foreseeable future is rain. But I’m basking in the glow of a summer of successes and of yesterday’s wonderful (albeit long) celebration hike.

Featured

Mountain State Fair: How to Enjoy Your Visit

It’s been a very emotional week. Instead of delving into change, I’ve intentionally kept this post playful and lighthearted. Last weekend, my parents, husband, daughter, and I all visited the North Carolina Mountain State Fair in Asheville. We wanted to compare it with our annual visit to the Washington State Fair. You may recall a comparable post in January about visits to the Washington and Alaska State Fairs. Which fair will be next?

My father, a die-hard Yankees fan, treated us all to tickets. He was fascinated by all the colorful rides. And despite afternoon thunderstorms in the region, we had a dry visit.

Animals at the NC Mountain State Fair

North Carolina’s Mountain State Fair is the official “state fair” for the mountainous region of the state. Located in Asheville, it runs for ten days and draws about 180,000 visitors each year. The Alaska State Fair draws close to 100,000, and over a million guests visit the Washington State Fair annually. We enjoyed each of them for different reasons.

While the Washington State Fair has considerably more animals on display, we were impressed with the unusual and unexpected variety at the NC Mountain State Fair. Sea lions swam in two big pools by the south entrance. Ponies provided rides for kids. Metal mechanical bulls were no contest for kid riders. And who can resist newborn calves in the “Mooternity Ward”? They drew as many guests as the Piglet Palace does in Puyallup.

Day-old calf, Candi, in the Mooternity Ward at the NC Mountain State Fair.

Week-old piglets (ten!) in the Piglet Palace at the Washington State Fair.

Exotic Draws

Eudora Farms hosted exotic animals ranging from camels to zebu, and kangaroos to ring-tailed lemurs. I especially loved the African watusi, the “guy with the big horns.” The fair also has two mechanical bulls for kids of all ages. I don’t recall seeing one at the Alaska or Washington fairs. Since my volunteering stint at Woodland Park Zoo ended during the COVID era, it was wonderful to see zoo-like animals again.

My father, daughter, and mother pose next to an African watusi, or "guy with big horns," courtesy of Eudora Farms at the NC Mountain State Fair. — My father, daughter, and mother pose next to an African watusi, or “guy with big horns,” courtesy of Eudora Farms at the NC Mountain State Fair.

Senior Citizen, Very Special Arts Categories

We found the biggest differences in the hobbies exhibits. In particular:

NC MSF had a “senior citizens” category separated by age groups, much like Legos for kids at WSF.
NCMSF also had a “very special arts” category for otherly abled entrants to exhibit their creations. I am unaware of either being available through the Alaska and Washington State Fairs, but that could certainly change.
Lego submissions can be of any size or even built from kits. The Washington State Fair has very stringent size requirements (10″ by 10″ by 15″ maximum) and designs must be unique creations with Lego brand bricks only, no kits.

NCMSF offered several special categories for entrants ranging from senior citizens crafts ... — NCMSF offered several special categories for entrants ranging from senior citizens’ crafts …

A very oversized helicopter made of Lego bricks would not have been acceptable at the Washington State Fair.

Another enjoyable part of the fair was an artisan pavilion where we could watch artists hard at work on their machine knitting, leather crafting, quilling, and even glass blowing. Outside the pavilion, a pair of wood carvers used chain saws on huge wooden blocks, and another put finishing touches of paint on a completed sculpture.

Food at the NC Mountain State Fair

When it comes to food, state fairs have two things in common: large portions and hefty prices. Washington State Fair is famous for its scones. People wait in line sometimes twenty deep to order one.

I was intrigued enough by the idea of a deep-fried Oreo to shoot a picture of the sign, but not enough to try one. And we spotted a “Chicken and Waffles” (i.e. waffle fries) booth at both the Washington and NC Mountain State Fairs.

Fried chicken strips and waffle fries seem to be a common occurrence at fairs.

NC MSF wins for food purchase: a Berry Berry smoothie!

But the most enticing (and only) food purchase we made at any of the three fairs was a Berry Berry Smoothie that we split three ways. Made from four fruits and almond milk, it was the only item that was remotely “health conscious.” By that, I mean it didn’t make any of us feel horrible afterward. Delicious!

Competitions

This year my husband entered five photographs at the Washington State Fair. My daughter submitted entries to the embroidery, crochet, Lego, and papercraft exhibits. I’m still trying to figure out how to turn my passion for helping people and playing with words into visual art others can enjoy.

I call myself the “cheerleader” with bragging rights on social media. Someday…

My husband's beautiful owl photo earned an Honorable Mention. — My husband’s beautiful owl photo earned an Honorable Mention.

My daughter's whimsical organic build of a dragon drew lots of comments from children as their favorite. — My daughter’s whimsical organic build of a dragon drew lots of comments from children as their favorite.

Have you visited the Washington State Fair yet? This year it runs through September 24. We tried our hand at archery near the entry gate. We got to view solar flares on the sun through a special telescope. And we watched a magnificent sword juggler on a high unicycle. Whatever you are interested in, you’ll find it at the fair.

I will be back next week with more reflections on another aspect of change once I am not in the midst of so much of it myself.

Featured

Trainer and Coach: How to Know the Difference

This week presented me with a number of blog options during a significant period of change. Shopping with my daughter for back-to-school items. Starting a new physical therapy program. Preparing to visit my parents. Visiting the Washington State Fair. And, tragically, watching a neighbor’s house go up in flames. The bright spot that stood out the most was the “aha” moment I had yesterday during my Master Health Coaching class. It dawned on me that readers might be interested in learning the difference between trainer and coach.

First place in quilling at the 2023 Washington State Fair. One of my family's traditions is to go on opening day to see how our entries do in various contests. — First place in quilling at the 2023 Washington State Fair. One of my family’s traditions is to go on opening day to see how our entries do in various contests.

Personal Trainer Defined

For 25 years I have been the lead personal trainer at Body Results Inc. As such, clients come to me seeking guidance and expertise on how to most effectively prepare for their outdoor adventure, my chosen niche.

Some might be preparing for a backpacking trip in the Grand Canyon or trekking to Everest Base Camp. Others might be interested in climbing Mt. Rainier, Denali, or Everest. A few want to participate in alpine skill-building classes. Occasionally I’ll get a client who wants to ski, kayak, canoe, or even compete in triathlons or marathons.

Trainer or coach? Depends on whether you want to be told exactly what to do or get guidance on a climb. A personal trainer will provide training programs. A climbing coach or guide might actually take you up the mountain.

Personal trainers generally advise their clients what to do in order to best reach their physical goals. They provide recommendations about stretching, mobility, strength training, and aerobic and anaerobic conditioning. Some may also include recovery, sleep, and nutrition guidelines. If you’re looking for someone to develop a program for you and help keep track of workouts, sets, reps, weights, and times, a personal trainer is the person to ask.

Coach Defined

On the other side of the “people-helping” spectrum are coaches. Their primary role is as a facilitator of learning. Coaches work in all fields: life, financial, spiritual, mental health, wellness, career, retirement, family, sales, sports… If you want guidance in some realm, you can probably find a coach for it. Coaches often play the role of educator, guide, facilitator, and mentor all rolled into one. They aim to improve your performance right now, rather than in the future.

Precision Nutrition, touted as “the largest and most respected private nutrition organization in the world,” teaches that coaches act as advisors and collaborators. Their philosophy is to “bring the boats alongside” — i.e. create a partnership where the coach lets the client take charge of their own health decisions. They encourage the development of autonomy and self-efficacy by mastering a certain set of skills that will get the client closer to their goal.

Our Body Results training studio. We even have space and means to coach Z-pulley set up and prusik set up. — Our Body Results training studio. We even have space and means to coach Z-pulley set up and Prusik set up.

One Big Difference

Ask yourself: Do you want to meet your trainer or coach in person or remotely? Having offered both, I can say there is an obvious, fundamental difference for the consumer post-COVID times.

Traditional personal training (guiding someone through a workout) is more challenging to offer on video calls. I have clients with home gyms who enlist my guidance as their trainer. Others record themselves doing exercises and then submit the video to me for critiquing.

Coach Court and Ajax on Dirty Harry's Peak with Mt. Rainier in the background. — Coach Court and Ajax on Dirty Harry’s Peak with Mt. Rainier in the background.

If you have issues that require hands-on manipulation, form check, positioning, or spotting, then in-person training might fit your needs best. If you know your way around a gym and want someone to develop a program for you to do on your own, remote training could work well.

A coach who offers thought experiments, tracking logs, and conversation can do so quite easily over video conferencing.

Trainer and Coach: Who Are You Looking For?

When you’re thinking about choosing between a trainer and coach, continue asking yourself questions such as these:

What is my end goal? Do I want general improved health and fitness or do I have a specific outcome goal in mind such as climbing the Matterhorn or completing the Snowman Trek in Bhutan?
What skills do I need to accomplish my objective and who can help me build those skills?

Think about what you want in a trainer and coach. Are you results-oriented? Is the goal more important than the journey? Who best aligns with what you want?

What type of person do I want to help me? Do I want to be told exactly what to do, or do I need a partner who will ask me enlightening questions to help me grow and challenge myself?
What obstacles stand in my way? Do I have an injury I need to rehabilitate? Do I have health issues I need to address first? Would help with the mental and emotional side of things make sense first?
Do I prefer meeting someone in person or would a video call, phone conversation, or email suffice?
What must come out of my sessions in order to feel that the relationship has been successful?

Armed with these answers, you will be able to determine whether you need a teacher, a physical therapist, a counselor, a nutrition or movement coach, a personal trainer, or someone else entirely. Each plays a vital and unique role, with different responsibilities and outcomes.

The embroidery piece that won the blue ribbon at the Washington State Fair is an intricate Parisian cafe scene.

My Evolution to Trainer and Coach

If you’re lucky, you might come across someone who has skills in a wide number of the above roles. I have more than 28 years of experience as a personal trainer. In the last seven years, I’ve added nutrition knowledge. Sleep, stress management, and recovery skills. Understanding of change psychology. Coaching skills. And, starting in November 2023, a journal coaching credential. A widely varied toolkit to draw from, depending on the client and what each person wants, needs, and wishes to use.

Evolution and Epiphanies

I’m evolving into someone I don’t yet recognize. (This is, after all, a blog about change.) During a role-play in my Master Health class last night, I had an epiphany. I was acting as the coach and started to have that deer-in-the-headlights feeling of “I dunno what to do here!” In the past, I’ve tried throwing out desperate suggestions: “You could try X. Have you thought about Y? What about considering Z?”

My office desk, where half of my Zoom conversations occur. And where I had my pivotal epiphany.

This time, I stopped. Pivoted. Took a breath. Quickly asked myself, What do I still need to know? A new open-ended question popped up that took us down a brand new path. A new entry into the maze. Exploring that one question led us to a solution my partner, the “client,” came up with. One that pleased and thrilled her. We never would have found it if I hadn’t let that silence be for a few seconds.

At that moment, I trusted the client to suggest her own answer. Precision Nutrition calls the need to fix things the “righting reflex,” the natural instinct we have to give advice, tell someone what to do, and make the problem disappear. That single moment was subtle to my coaching partners, but to me, it felt enormous. I’d broken my habit of “telling someone what to do.” I have finally metamorphosed into a trainer and coach.

Three things make me really happy: Hiking with my dog. Completing a challenge. And helping clients expand their potential.

Trainer and Coach: How About Both?

The good news is you can have a trainer and coach. Me! While I have been contemplating leaving personal training to become a full-time coach, there are benefits to continuing both.

Nutrition, personal training, journaling, sleep, stress, and recovery credentials all make me a well-rounded health and wellness coach, with access to a wide variety of tools to help you move toward your objective. And even better news is I am opening several more training spots for the remainder of the year.

If you are seeking a trainer and coach, let’s have a conversation to help you find your unique path forward.

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How to Rewrite The Rules at Peek-a-Boo Lake

Several weeks ago, a writing partner told me she’d mentioned my blog to a hiking friend of hers. Her friend didn’t find what she was looking for in my recent posts. It appears she was looking for long, tough hikes with huge elevation gain. When my friend called her friend a “hiking snob,” I laughed. Perhaps she just wasn’t interested in the change messages I shared. But on a family hike to Peek-a-Boo Lake yesterday, I thought about how stringent rules make us miss a lot in life. How might you rewrite the rules to get more from your life?

My hiking partners are ready to rewrite the rules with me.

The Drive

We left Seattle yesterday morning at 7:40 under overcast skies. We mistakenly headed toward Monroe before realizing we needed to go due north to Everett. Oops. I didn’t calculate the distance properly; my estimation of 1.5 hours ended up being closer to 2.25 hours.

When we pulled into the Beaver Lake Trailhead to use the Portapotty (since Peek-a-Boo doesn’t have any facilities) I checked the mileage sign for an idea of other hikes in the Darrington area. Refreshed and certain we were close, we drove up the forest service road toward Peek-a-Boo Lake. And that’s when the wonder and awe began, along with a very long, slow drive.

Five miles of brushy, one-lane, potholed road. By giving myself permission to rewrite the rules, we get to explore pristine forests in out-of-the-way places where berries burst off bushes and nobody else is there to bother us.

Obstacles

How long can five miles take to drive? Forever, if the road is narrow and brushy. The one-lane road was in fairly decent shape, but we had to hop out several times to clear branches and debris. A downed tree across the road provided JUST enough clearance to pass underneath without getting stuck. We proceeded slowly so the branches wouldn’t damage the paint on our car.

A downed tree across the road provided just enough clearance for our vehicle. — A downed tree across the road provided *just* enough clearance for our vehicle.

Rewards

Eight ruffed grouse, about the size of chickens, ducked in and out of the brush. My husband, a master birder through Seattle Audubon, pointed out that they collect gravel from the road to help with digestion. This sighting boosted my hiking bird list to 32 unique species in August, one of the less birdy months of the year. The other dozen species on this trip included golden-crowned kinglets, western tanagers, and evening grosbeaks.

Fog loaned an ethereal quality to the morning. Water droplets collected on spider webs, highlighting the silver strands and making the mossy mountainside mysterious and mystifying. We finally pulled into an empty parking area with space for about a dozen cars. I couldn’t wait to discover what this trail had to offer.

Delicate maidenhair ferns - my favorites - covered in droplets. I never would have guessed the Pacific Northwest had been in a drought since early July. — Delicate maidenhair ferns – my favorites – covered in droplets. I never would have guessed the Pacific Northwest had been in a drought since early July.

Why Hike Peek-a-Boo Lake?

Why Peek-a-Boo? Both my husband and daughter preferred something under eight miles without much elevation gain. At five miles and 1500 feet of gain, this hike fit perfectly. My daughter wanted to explore another alpine lake and perhaps collect berries. Ajax likes shade, running water, cool temperatures, and the ability to hike off-leash with his family.

In some ways, I resemble the hiking snob. Ajax and I usually cover 8-15 miles with 3-4000 feet of elevation gain. We prefer overcast and cool days with a crack-of-dawn start to avoid foot and car traffic. This summer I’ve had to rewrite the rules. I chose nine hikes that my daughter (a night owl) could enjoy. When my husband offered to join us, I put my intended destination, Island and Rainbow Lakes, on hold. Time to rewrite the rules.

Fascinating old-growth trees with interesting shapes and textures reach up into the fog. If we don't rewrite the rules, we might miss out. — Fascinating old-growth trees with interesting shapes and textures reach up into the fog. If we don’t rewrite the rules, we might miss out.

Could we visit a beautiful place I’d never been before? Have some unique bird encounters? Find a trail nobody else was using? The trail register just beyond the parking lot indicated that the last visitors were two hikers three days earlier on Sunday. We had the trail to ourselves. Success!

Berry Surprise

We reached the lake around noon, chatting about my daughter’s teachers over the years. Keeping both my husband and daughter talking means I don’t have much time to think about my blog. But this was my birthday. Last year we took a boat tour to the Kenai Fjords in Alaska. This year, we could include our dog. Rules are meant to be broken. And when you’re working with a wellness coach, you learn how to rewrite the rules.

The biggest surprise was finding bushes all along the lake bursting with berries. For an hour we collected wild huckleberries and blueberries. It reminded me of the family trip to pick alpine berries on Mt. Catherine two years ago, another hike that doesn’t “fit my usual rules.” Frankly, if you intend to spend any time picking berries, you probably don’t WANT to be on a long hike!

A handful of blueberries we picked at Peek-a-Boo Lake.

Lakeside bushes bursting with berries. — Lakeside bushes bursting with berries

Could I Rewrite the Rules?

I started writing this post thinking we wouldn’t return to Peek-A-Boo Lake. It takes so much effort just to reach the trailhead. But then I asked myself one of the “crazy questions” that Precision Nutrition coaches like to ask when they guide clients to rewrite the rules.

What could get me back there? I realized I needed to continue to rewrite the rules. If I hosted someone who wanted a shorter hike, the conversation in the car could make the long drive worthwhile.

If I were camping at the Clear Creek Campground for a week, I’d set myself up with a bunch of shorter day hikes to explore including Peek-a-Boo. And if I wanted to have a writer’s retreat away from the craziness of busy Seattle, what better place than visiting a lake that few people hike to?

Our rule is to go into any alpine lakes we visit. I chose to rewrite the rules for Peek-a-Boo Lake on a foggy, chilly day: wading works for me!

Your Turn To Rewrite The Rules

How about you? Do you have any unspoken rules that are weighing you down? Where did they come from? Who made them? Think of a rule you’d like to change. Maybe it’s as simple as “I can’t watch TV without eating a snack,” or “I can’t see a movie in the theater without popcorn and soda.” Have you ever tried? What could your new rule look like?

Another common rule might be, “For exercise to count, it has to make me sweat and be longer than an hour.” Says who? If you have five minutes, you have enough time to exercise.

Ajax is on high alert watching a squirrel race up a tree. He's so well trained, he knows not to chase. — Ajax is on high alert watching a squirrel race up a tree. He’s so well trained, he knows not to chase.

If you like what you read in this weekly blog and you’d like to talk to me about what you’d like to change, please connect with me. I’d love to help you discover your unspoken “shoulds” and help you rewrite the rules. Please share in the comments.

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Take Action Before Motivation: How to Get Unstuck

Excessive heat and poor air quality make everything more challenging. (Wildfires are burning in the Pacific Northwest.) Fortunately, most of my Body Results clients are climbing or have finished their summer adventures, so I am calling late August my “summer vacation.” But not without plenty of hard work. In addition to working through my 20-week-long Master Health Coach course, I’ve been eliminating addictive tendencies. I’ve discovered that taking action before motivation strikes is the key to getting unstuck. If you wait for motivation, you may never act.

Ajax poses on the bench at the summit of Cougar Mountain in the Whittaker Wilderness on August 19.

Return to Whittaker Wilderness

Pondering the complicated nature of addiction, I returned to Cougar Mountain with Ajax to celebrate a break in the heat. Saturday dawned in the low 50’s — perfect hiking weather. The morning’s weather report warned that shifting winds would bring wildfire smoke into the Puget Sound area. I didn’t want to risk getting caught in smoke like we did last fall (see my blog about a hike to Melakwa Lake). Even though I avoid hiking on weekends, we couldn’t pass up this opportunity.

The last time I hiked in the Whittaker Wilderness, I wrote about “Expecting the Unexpected.” In it, I shared how all three of us struggled with different aspects of the hike. On this trip, ready to redeem ourselves, Ajax and I hiked in the opposite direction, reaching the summit via the Gombu Wilderness Cliffs trail. We also visited Shy Bear Marsh, Long View (without a view), and Doughty Falls (which is now just a puddle), complete with a geocache we missed on our first visit.

Ajax poses by a moss-covered log in the early morning sunlight. I often take action before motivation by setting out my pack. He then does the motivating for me the next day.

Tsonduko: Love of Lots of Books

As we hiked, I wrestled with my thoughts. I’d successfully broken my addictive tendencies around chocolate, fruit, and playing a game on my phone. How could I break my addiction to books? Authors have the best excuses in the world for collecting them. We study them for craft. Keep books we love or stories by authors we wish to emulate. Celebrate writing friends’ successes by buying their new releases. Accumulate piles of those we want to read someday. There’s even a Japanese word for such amassing.

Tsonduko refers to the shelves of books you’ve acquired but haven’t yet read. In his Big Think article about the art of amassing books, Kevin Dickinson concludes that “the value of an unread book is its power to get you to read it.” Enter my problem: Faced with too many choices, I have been reaching for pen and paper rather than books. I needed to make some changes.

A community library north of my house which I recently donated generously to. Most of the boxes around me are now full, poised for back-to-school reading, perhaps?

At the start of summer, I promised myself I would pare down. But with Labor Day in two weeks, I hadn’t gotten motivated enough to start. Fortunately, my daughter loves books almost as much as I do. But she doesn’t have the same collection tendencies. She’s asked several times in the past few weeks, “Ready to sort books?”

Action Before Motivation: Don’t Wait

When Ajax and I returned from our hike, I felt something shift inside. I remembered what Marie Kondo suggested about gathering similar items together. Without a second thought, I grabbed an armful of books and carried them downstairs. Before I realized it, I’d moved all the books from the shelves in the guest room and home gym. No turning back!

My daughter’s interest in helping me provided the tiny spark I needed to begin. I simply took action before motivation ever appeared.

Now all of my books sit waiting in the basement. Every time I pass through there, I remember my commitment. Whenever I walk Ajax, I load books into a backpack and return the discards to Little Free Libraries so other community members can enjoy them.

A Little Free Library near the stairs down to Lake Washington which I visited on my Cedar Park Elementary School ramble.

Takeaways of Action Before Motivation

Several takeaways from this experience stuck with me.

I don’t know what made me grab the first few books. Thoughts about the successful Yard Share event? Not wanting to disappoint my daughter? Getting fresh air with Ajax? I know that taking action before motivation works. Nothing will stop me now.

Sometimes we need to contemplate change for some time before we’re finally ready to act. Last week I discussed the five stages of change and reflected on whether I was in the Preparation phase. Hiking, participating in the Yard Share event, and having my daughter offer to help have all moved me into the Action phase.
Think about a big change you want to make. List all the reasons (are they excuses?) you haven’t yet made the change. If “lack of motivation” tops the list, break your list into steps you could take. Make them into small actionable items. Then take the first step. If your goal is to climb a mountain, it requires one step at a time. Take action before motivation and your motivation to follow through will grow.

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Five Stages of Change: Am I in the Preparation Phase?

This week I feel like I’ve entered the “preparation” phase, the third of five stages of change. Stage three includes recognizing that change is imminent. But how remains unclear. In the preparation stage, we gather strategies and resources, take three steps forward and two back, and start to grow a sense of self-efficacy that maybe we CAN, indeed, change. The events that helped me move into this stage included a foggy hike of South Tiger Loop, a community-wide Yard Share event, and discovering my Change Capacity Assessment has improved over one I completed four months ago. What are you trying to change? Which of the five stages of change are you in?

South Tiger Loop

Last week’s adventure included exploring South Tiger Mountain Loop with Ajax and a friend. My daughter chose to sleep in that morning. My friend warned me that someone had reported a bear where we were headed. That was a double incentive for me, as I adore bears. Whether she felt nervous or just excited to get me caught up on her summer, I don’t know, but she maintained a constant chatter for much of the hike.

Every so often I dropped back to listen for birds. When a football shape swooped behind me, I let out a startled exclamation. She whipped around to see me peering through dense foliage. I mentioned that I’d spotted a barred owl. She seemed disappointed. At the end of the hike, my backpack accidentally brushed her shoulder. She let out a screech that left me as nervous as she must have felt.

A football-sized Barred Owl swooped in right behind me.

Marine Fog

We only encountered two other people on our hike. In addition to the solitude, what impressed me was the dense fog layer. We typically don’t get fog until fall. Was Mother Nature signaling a change? Might we skip wildfire season altogether and receive early rain?

As I write this a week later, however, we’re experiencing temperatures soaring above 90. It’s uncomfortable enough for me to postpone long rambles or short hikes with Ajax. I won’t risk exposing anyone to heat exhaustion – been there, done that, prefer not to repeat, thanks. Right now, it seems downright dangerous to let dogs wearing fur coats exert themselves for long periods of time. We can wait.

Fireweed in the fog near the South Tiger Summit.

Non-Linear Pathways

Just like humans going through the five stages of change, Mother Nature also flits back and forth, showing signs that change is imminent and then changing her mind at the last second. My transition to an empty nest has had similar fits and starts. A year of a mostly-empty nest. Summer with my daughter at home. And now as she prepares to return to college, I face a second year of a mostly-empty nest. This time, I feel better prepared. I am gaining self-efficacy.

Yard Share Community Event

The second event that got me thinking about the five stages of change was a community-wide Yard Share. In the Lake City area, seventy households agreed to participate. Think “garage sale” but without price tags. Saturday morning we set out stuffed animals, games, books, clothes, a trifold mirror, baby gate, posters, toys, and a few other miscellaneous objects that we’d stockpiled to donate to Goodwill. Maybe someone in the community would be able to enjoy them instead.

The Lake City area Yard Share event on August 12 included seventy different households.

Our Finds

We visited six Shares within walking distance, a family outing we could all enjoy with Ajax. We came back toting a treasure trove that included:

A brand-new vacuum cleaner which I used that very afternoon. Timely, as I am about to retire mine
An enormous, brown stuffed bear my daughter named Nora
Three jackets and a wicking hiking shirt
A mug
Four puzzles (one of which is missing a few pieces, but that’s okay, we can’t expect much for free)

More goodies and the QR code announcement sharing the other locations of the Yard Share event.

By the time we cleaned up around 8 Saturday evening, we’d cleared out about 75% of the items. Our next trip to Goodwill will be much easier.

Change in the Air

On a walk with Ajax the following morning, I realized I’d taken two months to follow through on an earlier commitment to bust clutter this summer. The external event with a deadline — a commitment to an outside party — helped get me to break through my inertia. By reducing clutter, I created additional space and capacity – both mentally and physically – for change. Another example of being in the preparation phase of change.

One of my daughter’s goals for the summer was to have a yard sale. While we didn’t make any money, she got the same experience putting it together, without the headache and hassle of having to sit still for eight hours or haggle over dimes and dollars. She’s going through massive changes as well. We all are.

More beautiful wildflowers on S. Tiger Loop.

Stages of Change: Change Capacity Assessment

The final piece of evidence that suggests I’m in the preparation stage is my recent results on Precision Nutrition’s Change Capacity Assessment. Feel free to take it yourself and see where you stand.

At the start of the summer, I scored “105/180” (the sum of all numbers, out of ten possible, on the 18 questions). Today I scored 128, an improvement of 23 points. While I may not be totally “ready, willing, and able” to make changes across the list of possibilities, in some areas, I am.

What changes are you in the midst of making? Have you been stuck for some time? If you score a 5 or lower on any question on the change assessment, take note. You may be facing strong resistance. Awareness is half of the battle.

The signpost leading to South Tiger Summit Trail. Which path will you take next?

Stages of Change

In fact, if you aren’t even acknowledging the need to change, you are still in the “pre-contemplation” stage. As you gather resources and get more comfortable with change in the “contemplation” stage, you may find that the cons outweigh the pros. In the “preparation” stage, you realize that the pros outweigh the cons and you get ready to take action.

In several areas, I’ve already headed into the “action” stage, such as launching my new coaching practice. It might be slow, but I’m laying the foundation. In others, like taking a technology or Chat GPT class, I’m back in pre-contemplation. And in others such as living gluten-free and sugar-free, I have reached “maintenance,” where the habit is well established with very few, if any, relapses. Be gentle with yourself and remind yourself that change does not happen linearly. It’s normal to wander all over the place before reaching the maintenance phase.

Ajax on our hike to Rachel Lake, getting a drink from the mountain stream.

But the empty nest change? I will probably continue to weave in and out of it for the next three years. Change happens on its own timetable. If we have pressure to change — like the Yard Share deadline — we might change momentarily, but then return to old habits. The more we practice sustainable change, the better we can navigate the murky waters and the more confident we can be that the change will hold.

If you found this article intriguing, insightful, or useful, please share your comments in the space below. I love hearing from readers.

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Paws and Reflections: 52 Rambles with Ajax

For anyone joining my blog after January 1, 2023, here’s a brief summary of our Active Ajax Adventures project. The quest: 52 unique adventures (one per week) with my 8-year-old Labraheeler and wonderful hiking partner, Ajax. The requirements: each green space ramble would last longer than an hour (and could include hikes), without repeats. I abbreviated the quest to “AAA”. The project was every bit as useful to me as the American Automobile Association is for drivers. Although I hesitate to do much with Chat GPT, I found one suggested AI headline to be appropriate: Paws and reflections. You be the judge whether it hits the mark.

Ajax heads off the trail for a drink of water near Snow Lake.

Project Kick-off

In my second blog post of the year, I asked myself, “Why would anyone want to read about this?” Frankly, it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about your intentions as long as they ENERGIZE YOU. By using a tool Precision Nutrition refers to as the “Five Whys“, I drilled down to my Big Reason for completing this project: “As a way to explore mindfulness, learn to become more fully present, and experience joy in tiny moments.” In short, I framed it as an experimental path toward contentment and well-being.

Happy cooled-off swimmers about to leave the buggy shores for the hot trip out of the basin at Snow Lake.

Paws and Reflections: the Murky Middle

We zipped along with our project for the first half of the year. But in early June, I almost gave up. I shared why in a post about feeling stuck called “Murky Middle: How to Follow Through on Intentions.” By modifying some of my own guidelines (after all, I made them up, I can change them!) I decided to take our rambles to the mountains. My energy immediately surged forward again.

The last quarter of the project has been my favorite. My teenage daughter, home for the summer, joined us for 9 hikes. Although my husband and I have been wrestling with “a partially empty nest” since fall 2022, it feels like having her back has erased our progress on that front. But our relationship is so much richer than it ever was. We can relate to each other as adults. I absolutely love this phase.

Clear, beautiful waters of Snow Lake as we climbed out of the basin in the heat of midday.

While we have stumbled over some obstacles, especially in Cougar Mountain’s Whittaker Wilderness, we have also discovered a common passion: visiting — and swimming in — alpine lakes.

The Joy of Alpine Lakes

Of the nine hikes Ajax and I have done with my daughter, most included lakes or waterfalls. The most memorable, Mirror, Snow, and Rachel Lakes, all involved swimming for at least half an hour.

Teneriffe Falls
Annette Lake
Wallace Falls
Olallie and Talapus Lakes
Whittaker Wilderness (*We dubbed Doughty Falls a “Leak” as it’s seasonal)
Mirror Lake
Snow Lake
Rachel Lake

Mirror Lake

The rutted gravel road to Mirror Lake trailhead was the most challenging for us to navigate this year. It easily added an extra half hour in the car, sometimes at 5-10 mph. However, the PCT is a beautiful trail, and we encountered very few hikers on a Thursday in July. I’d only been on this trail to Mirror Lake once before, in November of 2021 in snow, so it felt new to me.

On this particular hike, the biggest surprises were:

The duration of my daughter’s swim (nearly an hour)
How much improvement she’d made in strength and conditioning in only two weeks (either that, or she’s very motivated to see lakes!)
Not a peep out of Ajax, who waited patiently by the shore, with wet paws. He’ll go in if we carry him in but otherwise, he’s nothing like other Labrador Retrievers.

Deep, emerald waters of Mirror Lake along the Pacific Crest Trail. When I saw my daughter go in for a swim, I simply had to join her. A new mother-daughter tradition was launched.

Snow Lake

Another fun trip was a midweek hike to Snow Lake with my college crewmate and her teenage son, a student at the University of Washington in my daughter’s year. This destination at Snoqualmie Pass is incredibly popular, especially since some of the water-play trailheads along I-90 are closed this year for construction and trail maintenance. While we enjoyed spending two hours at the lake, I worried about how Ajax would do going back.

The rocky south-facing slope heats up significantly in the middle of the day. When I noticed Ajax overheating, I handed my car keys to my friend to get the air conditioning going in the car. My daughter and I slowed our pace and coaxed Ajax out. He’s done a phenomenal job this year, but he’s not getting any younger.

Paws and reflections for my fearless hiking companion. He loves watching critters and doesn't seem to be bothered by bugs. — Paws and reflections for my fearless hiking companion. He loves watching critters and doesn’t seem to be bothered by bugs.

Paws and Reflections: Where’s the Finish Line?

A few days later, I stalled again. I really wanted to finish our Ramble project with a special, meaningful, new-to-me or favorite hike, but most of the ones on my list were either too long for my daughter or too hot for Ajax.

Rachel Lake

Finally, on Thursday, August 3, we found the perfect destination: Rachel Lake. Not only were there relatively few people, but the first 2.75 miles are lovely, rambling through meadows and forest along Canyon Creek with plenty of wonderful photo opportunities. It took us four hours to reach the lake (and two hours out) because we kept finding places to stop.

The trail was not without its trials. My daughter had a boot mishap at the second stop. While interesting, the copious roots, stones, and route-finding issues on the trail between mile 3 and the lake (a gain of 1200 feet in 1.25 miles) frustrated my daughter, and the steep steps challenged Ajax. The horseflies were annoying. I was the only one who had brought food.

Repeat in the Future?

When I asked my daughter if she would consider going back, she gave me an emphatic no. The steep jumps left my dog’s tail tucked and droopy for a good two days. Can a dog break his tail? Where was all his energy? I might be tempted to return in a month to see the fall foliage, feast on ripe blueberries, and add an extra two miles to see the view from Alta Peak. But I’d be going by myself.

Ajax and I wait for Brooke to come up from her swim. Rachel Lake is beautiful but cold.

Ramble Project Takeaways

This project was wonderful in so many ways, but I’ll share three highlights. First, it got me out of my comfort zone, visiting new places. I’d become a creature of habit the past three years, going to the same places each year. This year Ajax and I expanded our repertoire by a full eighteen locations, many of which I now suggest to clients who are looking for less-populated hiking trails.

Second, it made me want to continue to explore new dog-friendly locations. There are so many wonderful places to visit in the Pacific Northwest that are not overrun by people. What’s more, my daughter wants to keep building her stamina and tolerance for elevation gain so we can visit harder-to-access alpine lakes such as Blanca Lake whenever it re-opens. We might even try some backpacking next summer!

Paws and Reflections: a mother and daughter selfie at Rachel Lake while Ajax rested in the shade. I am thrilled beyond belief that Ajax and I have been able to add her presence to our last nine rambles.

Finally, knowing how close I was to quitting the ramble project in June, I’m delighted that we kept going. By doing some “paws and reflections” I’ve come to see just how fabulous these last nine hikes have been with my two favorite hiking partners. Completing my intended objective feels great. And I have a new hiking partner, at least for a few more weeks.

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Squak Mountain: a Potential New Favorite

On July 11, I considered skipping my intended hike. Hey, it happens to all of us. But when I saw high, wispy clouds, I convinced myself that it could be a good day to get a view of Mt. Rainier from Debbie’s View on Squak Mountain. Ajax picks up on clues quickly; he whined excitedly the night before when he saw my backpack. Committing to 52 unique adventures with him kept me engaged and interested for the past seven months. But what sent me to the car that morning was the idea of a view and of hearing varied birdsong. By visiting Squak’s Central Peak, we may have identified a new favorite mountain to explore.

Like Tiger and Cougar, Squak Mountain provides a lovely interwoven lattice of trails that result in a "choose your own adventure" ramble, just what I was looking for. — Like Tiger and Cougar, Squak Mountain provides a lovely interwoven lattice of trails that result in a “choose your own adventure” ramble, just what I was looking for.

Wrong Turn

As I drove past the Poo Poo Point trailhead off Exit 17, I realized that Cougar and Squak Mountain were accessible from Exit 15. Oops! I’d been on autopilot, listening to an audiobook about becoming more productive. Ironic, I know. Assuming May Valley Road would eventually lead me to something we could hike, I continued south and then turned west.

We pulled into the May Valley parking area to find 5-6 cars already dotting the lot. A solo trail runner stretched at her car. Cedar waxwings squeed near the Portapotties. I have never hiked on Squak before, so I figured we’d take our chances. If not than Debbie’s View and Margaret’s Way (the westmost trailhead, 6.5 miles with 1500′ gain), we’d find something else for our 48th ramble.

Benefits of May Valley Trail

From the May Valley Trailhead, we followed signs for Central Peak (6.6 miles with 2,320’ gain). My auto-pilot mistake resulted in finding an even more appealing option than West Tiger 3 (5 mi. 2100′ gain).

On our ascent, we encountered only three people: a woman and her dog (who admitted she never sees anyone on that trail, and we’d have the upper mountain to ourselves) and two solo trail runners. The May Valley Trail on the south side of Squak gets very little highway noise. The mountain has not been logged like Tiger, and we found plenty of opportunities to create our own adventure. The only drawback this time of year is the lack of running water. Fortunately, I carry plenty for Ajax although he prefers streams.

Encountering this sign on Squak Mountain piqued my curiosity about the Bullitt Family legacy.

Solitude and Quiet

The May Valley trail is lovely, lush, green, and well-signed. I did some research afterward to find out more about the Bullitt Family who once owned much of the land and donated it to the state as a wilderness public park. I don’t often learn about the history of a place ahead of time (especially if I “wing it”!) but in this case, I was curious and wanted to know more.

On our solitary journey, we heard 22 bird species, including a great horned owl, downy, hairy, and pileated woodpeckers, a Steller’s jay (who, interesting fact, are particularly fond of eating baby hummingbirds!), Swainson’s thrushes (who sing my favorite birdsong), Cedar waxwings (the masked “raccoons” of the bird world), brown creepers, and black-headed grosbeaks.

(By comparison, during a recent hot-weather visit to Snow Lake, we encountered so many people that I only heard eight species.) I also shot 53 photos including trail signs, acting as breadcrumbs that could help us navigate back to our car.

Tiger, Cougar, and Squak all have excellent trail signs to help you navigate.

Squak Mountain: Bullitt Fireplace

One of the reasons I love exploring is feeling like an adventurer and discovering curious new-to-me things. When I saw the sign for Bullitt Fireplace, I had no idea I’d actually find the remains of a stone fireplace, the remnant of a two-room vacation cabin built in 1952 by Stimson Bullitt. That sparked my imagination. How long did it take to build it? Where did they get the materials? Did they have to bushwhack or did they have crude roads to haul rocks and timber? How often did they use it? And why did vandals destroy it?

I did some digging later to learn more about Charles Stimson “Stim” Bullitt. He had the cabin built in 1952 as a weekend retreat and climbed in the Cascades until the age of 87. At 62, on his third try at North America’s highest peak, Bullitt summited 20,320-foot Denali. His family owned and managed Seattle’s KING radio and TV stations, and his extensive real estate holdings included 590 acres on Squak Mountain which the Bullitt family later donated to the state to form the nucleus of Squak Mountain State Park. Hiking gives me a growing appreciation for what this land looked like before settlers “conquered” and tamed it.

A picnic table set at Bullitt Fireplace, all that remains of the Bullitt Family cabin.

Squak Mountain: Chybinski Loop

We continued beyond Central Peak, expecting to find a view somewhere, but we missed the power station and reached a sign for Phil’s Trail and Old Griz before backtracking. Determined to see what else we could find, we decided to visit West Peak. Perhaps it would have more of a view.

Chybinski Loop includes a very steep trail to a tiny sign for West Peak, where some sort of shack must have once stood but has since been flattened. I had the brilliant idea to find the hook-up of the loop instead of backtracking. “I’m not going back up that,” I thought. Famous last words.

All that remains of the shack at West Peak.

Squak Mountain: Debbie’s View

Eureka! Only .3 miles farther, we found signs for Debbie’s View, our original destination. As we added yet another extension, I did the mental math. Could we end up covering ten miles round trip? Unfortunately, the low clouds obscured any view we might have had of Mt. Rainier, so we didn’t linger. Then I got the bright idea to drop down to Margaret’s Way and return to May Valley along the perimeter trail.

Halfway down the wide, hardened trail toward Margaret’s Way, we encountered three women with a dog, followed by three others a few minutes behind them. Out of curiosity, I asked if they knew how much farther the perimeter trail was. One of the hikers – the one who spoke English – said I was mistaken, and I would need to backtrack to Bullitt Gorge. Bummer.

Goatsbeard, bleeding hearts, and clouds - but no view of Mt. Rainier from Debbie's View. — Goatsbeard, bleeding hearts, and clouds – but no view of Mt. Rainier from Debbie’s View.

Hasty Retreat

Always question assumptions! Fortunately, on an overcast day, more mileage never hurts. We still had water and food, and the shade and clouds were keeping it cool enough for Ajax. We backtracked at high speed, quickly leaving them behind to regain our solitude. By that point, I no longer felt as confident in my assumption that Bullitt Gorge would return us to May Valley (it does.)

Faced with adding even more mileage if I turned out to be wrong, I chose the known path back. My commitment to “not go back up that,” referring to Chybinski Loop? It honestly wasn’t as bad the second time around.

Spot the pup! The storm devastation through thick rambling woods on Squak Mountain's Chybinski Loop. — Spot the pup! The storm devastation through thick rambling woods on Squak Mountain’s Chybinski Loop.

Lesson Learned

The takeaway message from this outing was clear. If at first, you don’t succeed, try, try again. It was apparent when we elected to start from a different trailhead that we needed to be flexible and open to discovery. By staying open to possibility, I reminded myself that mistakes are opportunities, something that people with a growth mindset embrace. Maybe I could be developing a growth mindset after all.

Fortunately, we were able to link trails to reach our intended destination (Debbie’s View) with solitude, exploration, and birdsong along the way. It might not have been what we originally set out to do, but I’m happy I took the wrong turn.

Radio towers at the top of Squak's Central Peak. — Radio towers at the top of Squak’s Central Peak.

Change Meets Year Three

Such a coddiwomple is a fitting metaphor to kick off the third year of this blog. When I started blogging on July 31, 2021, during the middle of a pandemic, I wasn’t sure where I was headed or if this “blog thing” would even work out.

Year One Recap

In starting my blog, I knew only that I wanted something meaningful, memorable, and good to come out of the dregs of COVID. Those first six months were a time of trial and error until I developed my voice, message, and style.

The second six months between February and August 2022 were my “heal from a broken right wrist” months. Change became more difficult but mandatory as I battled to rehab my right arm while maintaining a household and handling a busy season of online clients. But I kept going despite facing three major health challenges.

My daughter and I are visiting as many alpine lakes as we can this summer. Mirror Lake via the PCT was ramble 49 on July 13, 2023.

Year Two Recap

From August 2022 to January 2023, I confronted an empty nest for the first time. Our daughter attends a local university and likes coming home most weekends. So empty nest became a “partly empty nest” as we adjusted to five days without her, and two days with her.

To help me cope, I developed the Active Ajax Adventures challenge (52 nonrepeated greenspace rambles) which we successfully completed in July 2023. Now that she’s home for the summer, I find myself naturally, rapidly, and comfortably evolving and growing. But what will happen when she returns to college?

The author enjoys a dip in Snow Lake at Exit 52 on July 19, 2023, during Ramble 51.

Year Three Projections

My grandiose plans for year three included diving deep into the “ABCs of Change.” But in sharing my ideas with my husband and writing partners, it became evident that I would be restricting myself — to the point of getting stuck before I ever started. Have you ever made so many rules or placed so many limits on yourself that you come to a complete standstill? Yup.

So instead, this year I will examine the mental aspects of change. To quote one of my wise writing partners, “To write about whatever moves or inspires me.” That might mean becoming more vulnerable, which terrifies me. I see far more growth potential there than in writing what I’ve come to see as my “safe” trip reports.

Look for the beauty in everything, including mistakes. Mistakes are our greatest teachers and point out unique learning opportunities.

Join me in year three on a continued journey through change, to move forward and get unstuck.

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Blog One Hundred: Tiger’s Poo Poo Point on the Fourth

For this week’s Active Ajax Adventure, my intentions were to find a longer, shaded hike that would provide uninterrupted solitude, avoid road construction, and beat the holiday crowds and summer heat. This was ramble 46 (and hike 12) on the year but more importantly, potential material for blog one hundred. We visited West Tiger 3 from Poo Poo Point, making a giant loop covering ten miles and about 3000′ elevation gain.

Cross to the "obvious trailhead", in this case, marked with a parachute and flag. — Cross to the “obvious trailhead”, in this case, marked with a miniature parasail and flag.

The Solitude of an Early Start

I’d heard that people love to watch parasailers take off from Poo Poo Point, so we needed an early start. I’d never been on this trail before so I wasn’t quite sure what to expect. How early was “early”? Would the trailhead be as obvious as the description made it out to be? Would it be as crowded as “the highway” from Exit 20?

Ajax and I pulled into the parking lot at 6:15, delighted to find only eight other cars. Score! As we started up the well-maintained rock trail I felt like I was climbing Mother Nature’s Stairmaster. We spotted a trail runner on the way down, a woman walking her dog, and a pair of trail runners who passed us going up, but for the most part, we had the trail to ourselves.

The first part of Poo Poo Trail is rock, rock, and more rock through beautiful dense woods. Once you complete the switchbacks the traffic noise fades away.

The day served up such feathered lovelies as olive-sided flycatchers (drink! three! beers!), Swainson’s thrushes (an ascending melodic spiraling song), western tanagers, a pileated woodpecker (one of my favorite birds), and chestnut-backed chickadees. As we warmed up, the stiffness in my lower back loosened up and some unusual hip discomfort on the left side disappeared. We were both in our element.

Poo Poo Point

We reached a magnificent view of Mt. Rainier in less than an hour. We paused for some photos and I asked another hiker if he knew which path would take us to West Tiger 3. I’d seen a gravel service road on the map that looked promising, but he insisted I continue to Poo Poo Point.

“Once you reach it, take the trail behind the restroom.” I thanked him for the information.

“It’s very far,” he added, looking at me as though wondering whether I’d started from the wrong trailhead.

“I know,” I assured him. “That’s what I’m looking for.”

Less than ten minutes later, we reached the vacant Poo Poo Point with a view of Lake Sammamish and all points west. Squak. Cougar Mountain. Seattle. The Olympics.

Ajax investigates the launching area where we'd later see parasailers take off. But when we arrived around 7:15 there was only one person with a pair of binoculars. — Ajax investigates the launching area where we’d later see parasailers take off. But when we arrived around 7:15 there was only one person with a pair of binoculars.

Beyond Poo Poo Point to One-View

Once we’d taken photos from Poo Poo Point, we continued toward the restroom and found a trail leading into the dense woods beyond it. I am well-acquainted with West Tiger 3, but exclusively from the north. How hard would it be to find One-View Trail?

It turns out that the signage everywhere on Tiger is excellent. We soon found ourselves on One-View, and I was looking forward to the view. Except it must be named for the only view it has: green, green, and more green. Enormous tree stumps. And several precious orange tiger lilies.

At the junction of One-View and Tiger Mountain Trail, we headed toward Tiger 2 and the logging zone. Now I knew exactly where we were, even though I’d never been on this part of the trail before.

Even the stumps have eyes. A selfie on One-View Trail.

Tiger Mountain Trail: TMT

The more I explore Tiger Mountain, the more interest I have in doing the entire 15-mile long TMT. Apparently, portions of the trail will be intermittently closed through the fall of 2024, but we didn’t encounter any closures. We did, however, discover parts of the trail that are overgrown, eroded, or muddy, so perhaps there are plans to fix those problems.

An eroded portion of the trail where a giant tree root system has collapsed.

Plenty of short bridges traverse steep ravines and the worst of the mud. I sensed that both the TMT and Railroad Grade, at least between Poo Poo and West Tiger 3, don’t experience heavy foot traffic. We had the trail to ourselves, highly unusual for a beautiful summer holiday weekend. Win!

Once we reached a thinner part of the forest, I knew we must be approaching the logged portion of the mountain. In just two years, West Tiger 3’s barren, slashed, and ugly summit has become transformed into a lush alpine meadow with beautiful lupines, daisies, and foxgloves. And the views! Oh my. We shared the summit with one man when we arrived around 9 a.m.

Foxgloves, an erratic boulder, and chopped tree stumps.

Section to Railroad Grade

Once we left the summit of West Tiger 3, I searched for a stick to help me down the steep “unmaintained” trail known as Section Line. It is even steeper than Cable Line, and in the dry conditions we’ve had, it’s like walking on marbles. I’ve slipped enough in the past five years to last a lifetime; I wasn’t taking any chances.

Fortunately, with all the recent logging, there are plenty of sticks to choose from. Mother Nature provided a nice walking stick and I left it at the sign marking Section Line and Railroad Grade. May someone else benefit from it as well.

We ventured onto another new-to-us trail looking for the junction with One-View and our return to Poo Poo Point.

I believe this plant is called Goats' beard but don't quote me on that. — I believe this plant is called Goats’ Beard, but don’t quote me on that.

Return To Poo Poo Point

We returned to Poo Poo Point around 10:15 where plenty of spectators had gathered to watch parasailers take flight. Had the car in the parking lot hauled up all of the chutes? Or do the parasailers carry them up themselves?

Watching parasailers take off from Poo Poo Point.

As I watched more and more people hiking up from the Poo Poo Point trailhead, I realized how dramatic the contrast was between the solitude we’d experienced during the first four hours of our hike and the holiday crowd watching at the Point. I realized that on a sunny Monday morning, the day before Independence Day, Poo Poo is probably just as crowded as Rattlesnake Ledge. Fortunately, we had less than an hour to return to the car.

We took one more pause at the overlook for a shot of my favorite pup and my favorite mountain.

We’ve reached the end of blog one hundred. I am thrilled you’re continuing on this journey with me. I will be taking most of July to figure out the direction to take for year three. I’ll return in August with exciting new material.

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Expect the Unexpected in Whittaker Wilderness

Making your way through obstacles, struggles, and change is tough work. Especially when your obstacles blindside you. Ajax, my daughter, and I explored the Whittaker Wilderness and environs on Cougar Mountain. And the best tip I can supply from that trip is to expect the unexpected.

Shy Bear Pass and Doughty Falls will always remind me of hiking over the boardwalk with two of my favorite companions, my daughter and my dog Ajax. We all faced unexpected obstacles on this hike.

Previous Blog Posts

Such an idea is not new to this blog. I wrote about setting intentions on Mt. Washington in May. What if we set an intention to handle unexpected events with ease, grace, and humor? Last fall I reflected on the beauty of hiking Granite Mountain in the shoulder season, not expecting the gorgeous fall foliage. The unexpected can be positive…and negative.

Almost two years ago I discussed how to turn disappointment into gratitude at Blanca Lake when we arrived in fog, only to have it lift shortly before we left. One of the reasons I continue to venture to the mountains is I recognize Mother Nature has a lot to teach me. So what would Cougar Mountain reveal?

Narrow boardwalks snake through Shy Bear Marsh on a circuit from Whitaker Peak to Doughty Falls. We didn't encounter anyone coming in the opposite direction, or crossing could resemble a game of Twister. — Narrow boardwalks snake through Shy Bear Marsh on a circuit from Whitaker Peak to Doughty Falls. We didn’t encounter anyone coming in the opposite direction, or crossing could resemble a game of Twister.

Expect the Unexpected #1: Early Fatigue

Last Wednesday, the three of us headed for Exit 15 and the Whittaker Wilderness to do a 7.5-mile loop up Whittaker Peak to Shy Bear Pass to Doughty Falls. We headed up the trail at 8:25 a.m. I’d put a lot of thought into this choice. My desires were to prevent any of us from getting overheated, avoid sitting in traffic during road construction or rush hour, and enjoy a new trail without a lot of crowds. While we accomplished all three, we each faced our own obstacles.

The first unexpected obstacle was one my daughter faced. I could tell within ten minutes that she was having an off day. We stopped after ten minutes for a rest. Ten minutes later, while I was barely feeling warmed up, she dragged herself to a boulder and sat, dejected. The “go forever” solo hiker voice inside me reared its ugly head but I successfully squelched it. After all, we were doing something together as a mom and daughter. It was a gorgeous day and we had until early afternoon.

The mossy, fern-filled Cougar wilderness right before our first clothing break. Ajax wanted to dash ahead but we kept him on his leash.

Taking Weight

After thirty minutes, and our third break, I resorted to diversion tactics including cracking jokes. Then I tried becoming a sleuth. Had she eaten breakfast? Were her feet feeling okay? It turns out she’d really been looking forward to having another person join us. But both people we’d invited had other plans. So part of the problem was disappointment. And perhaps the fact that there was no lake on this hike had her unmotivated.

On the fly, I told her we wouldn’t go all the way up to the Whittaker Peak summit, we’d just do the flatter loop. Even that news didn’t motivate her. When I finally asked if she wanted to go back to the car, she said yes, but she didn’t want to feel like a loser.

On the ascent, I simply strapped her pack on my front like a Baby Bjorn front carrier. On the way down I got smart and unloaded her stuff into mine and folded up her pack. That way I could see my feet and reduce the risk of a fall.

“We all have off days. Just because someone turns around doesn’t make them a loser,” I told her. But she gets her stubbornness from her independent parents. She refused to budge. I offered to carry her pack to see if that helped. We finally got moving again.

Doughty Falls

Fortunately, we raised a resilient teen. Once we’d completed most of the gain her oomph and enthusiasm returned. She just doesn’t like steep uphills; I get that. We meandered past Shy Bear Pass and over boardwalks at Shy Bear Marsh, finally reaching Doughty Falls around 10:45 a.m.

“More like Doughty Trickle,” I quipped. She preferred “Doughty Leak.” Who am I to argue? This time of year ferns drape the rocks but nothing more indicates a waterfall except lush green and a drop-off. Still, it was our farthest destination, so we stopped for a snack.

The author takes a selfie at "Doughty Leak." I preferred "Doughty Trickle" myself... — The author takes a selfie at “Doughty Leak.” I preferred “Doughty Trickle” myself…

Expect the Unexpected 2: Ajax’s Mallady

About half a mile later, Ajax acted as though he’d gotten stung, stabbed, or bitten. He pawed at his face and then immediately rolled around in the dirt. Was he trying to deaden the pain or get rid of something in his face? When he stood up, it looked like he’d done something to his left front paw. He took a few steps and then plopped down and refused to go.

My daughter checked out his paw to see if he had anything embedded in it. Would we have to carry him? I was already carrying both our packs and wasn’t sure I could carry the dog, too, even using his suitcase harness. The only option we had left was to let him rest and see if he could walk out on his own.

Our pooch, resting on his non-favorite side. Flashbacks to my other dog, Emily, and her death in 2012 had me near tears. I would NOT let it happen. Ajax is only eight. But if we expect the unexpected, we know that someday life for loved ones will happen. It doesn't make it any easier. — Our pooch, resting on his non-favorite side. Flashbacks to my other dog, Emily, and her death in 2012 had me near tears. I would NOT let it happen. Ajax is only eight. But if we expect the unexpected, we know that someday life for loved ones will happen. It doesn’t make it any easier.

Tricks to Try

Something similar with Ajax had happened twice before: once on a hike of Mailbox Peak, when he started limping for no apparent reason, and the other during a winter hike on Big Tree Ridge. Both times he recovered with rest. Little Man can’t talk, but he is a good communicator. I knelt to give him a paw massage, and after we let him rest for fifteen minutes, my daughter commented that he looked dead.

I had one last trick up my sleeve. Cheese. His favorite treat. I tore off tiny bites and handed them to him. That perked him right up. He didn’t stand, but he did look interested. At that moment I knew, somehow, he was going to be okay. After five bites and some water, I repacked my bag and he stood up. He took a few tentative steps with a faint limp. But after that, he seemed fine. Crisis averted.

My daughter and I discussed the challenges of having four legs and losing use of one, or having two and losing use of one. Many three-legged dogs adapt just fine; humans can get a prosthetic. But which would be easier?

Expect the Unexpected #3: Emotional Tidal Wave

My own obstacle followed shortly thereafter. We rounded the corner where the paths leading to Whittaker Peak and Gombu Wilderness Cliffs diverge. A woman was supervising a large number of children clambering around a mossy boulder. They had a large off-leash and highly energetic Swissy with them who wanted to play with Ajax.

I politely told the child closest to the dog that my dog just injured his paw and would she please call off her dog. The woman uttered something like, “Thank you for asking politely, calmly, and respectfully.” I nodded as we walked by. I remember thinking, “She must be modeling kind behavior for her kids.” As Ajax and my daughter disappeared ahead of me, something snapped.

Ajax poses by an enormous moss-covered log in the Whitaker Wilderness in the southeast corner of Cougar Mountain.

Triggers

Seeing my best canine friend lying on the dirt, perhaps injured – could I have prevented it? – and having my daughter use the word “dead” triggered a wave of anticipatory grief. Eleven years ago we lost our first dog to lung cancer. Hearing the woman use the word “calm” for me, when I felt anything but, did something more. Add to that my daughter calling the trail “boring” and my fears that she was no longer enjoying hiking with me and I lost it.

A tidal wave of emotions rushed through me. Shame. Guilt. Grief. Sadness. Frustration. Longing. The slightest thing can unleash a torrent out of nowhere. Traumatic experiences like euthanizing a beloved pet can do that. I know if and when I lose Ajax it will be the worst pain I can possibly imagine. Nothing can prepare us for that.

But not yet. Thank the powers that be, not yet.

My eager Little Man, always ready for anything. He's the best hiking partner anyone could ever ask for. — My eager Little Man, always ready for anything. He’s the best hiking partner anyone could ever ask for.

Fortunately, my daughter was ahead of me. I knew I needed to let the tears out and then get my act together. I took several deep box breaths to help move past the hurt. But not before she noticed me rubbing my head.

“Are you okay?” she asked. I nodded.

“Did you get stung?”

“Only in the proverbial sense.” I assured her I was fine, just dealing with emotional demons. And the rest of the hike unfolded uneventfully.

Two intricate and fascinating snails on the Cougar trails.

I know my worries are first-world problems. They still feel stressful.

Takeaways

Perhaps the biggest takeaways from this experience of unexpected events are twofold: that we have the knowledge we need deep inside us. Our job is to listen, to tap into it, and to trust it. And Mother Nature teaches us what we need to know when She knows we can handle it.

My job is to amass as many tools as I can so I don’t get blindsided by grief the next time it comes. I know it’s coming. And I am preparing. But I won’t let that detract from today’s happiness. Over the past two years, I have shared a number of techniques and tips around embracing change and getting unstuck. Knowing what to do, however, doesn’t necessarily make it any easier.

Two posts ago I asked readers to share their “close calls.” This week please share any surprising obstacles that caught you off guard for which you felt under-prepared. What resources do you draw on to get through tough situations? How do you remain calm when you feel the world is collapsing around you?

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Talapus and Olallie Lakes: How to Enjoy Your Visit

On a recent hike to Talapus and Olallie Lakes, I practiced “channeling my inner wood duck” (i.e. going with the flow). Ajax, my daughter, and a friend joined me on a sunny midweek adventure. To enjoy the trip yourself, plan on allowing at least 30-45 minutes to explore the shoreline at each lake. Join us on our journey into the woods.

Log jam at Talapus Lake under perfect conditions.

At the Trailhead

We reached the trailhead at Exit 45 a little before 9. I’d suggested we leave early since we’re in peak hiking season and the Talapus Lake parking lot is small. Eleven cars were already parked when we arrived, leaving plenty of spaces. Hurray for midweek hikes!

The four of us headed up the Talapus Lake trail under sunny, clear conditions with a light breeze. More like what our guest, Zach, was used to in Arizona, rather than the rain we experienced four days earlier at Wallace Falls. This time he borrowed a water bottle and refilled it twice before starting the hike. There’s always something unexpected with teenagers!

Red marks and blue tape on select trees denote the extent of the logging area.

Trail to Talapus and Olallie Lakes

The area near the parking lot has recently been logged up to a sign indicating the boundary of the Alpine Lakes Wilderness. WTA trail maintenance crews have worked extensively on this wide, moderate trail over the past decade, most recently in 2021. Since I have only accessed Talapus and Olallie via the Pratt Lake trail (at exit 47), I was excited to explore a new trailhead. We were not disappointed.

The din of I-90 traffic faded as we gradually climbed into a denser forest. My daughter and Zach hiked ahead with Ajax while I hung back to identify birdsong (17 species including a red-breasted sapsucker, a type of woodpecker) and shoot photographs (113) of treasures in the peaceful woods.

Gentle switchbacks lead to Talapus and Olallie Lakes.

A close-up of what I loosely call shelf fungus with dew drops.

Waterfall Detour

One of the advantages of hiking in a small, private group rather than a larger guided group is the freedom and independence to explore. When we came across a river cascade beyond an enormous fallen tree, we meandered off-trail in search of cool vantage points and photo opportunities.

My heart nearly stopped when Zach contemplated crossing a mossy log that had fallen across a stream. When he glanced over at me shaking my head, he changed his mind and found another way. They may both be adults, but teen brains are still developing. Thoughts of emergency first aid and “what if” raced through my mind until we were safely back on the official trail. If there is a way to squelch the mothering instinct, I haven’t found it.

At Talapus Lake we stopped for a short water break and agreed to continue to Olallie Lake first. Then we could backtrack and spend more time anywhere that caught our interest.

I had one momentary fright when I slipped on a wet log. In a split second, I landed on my left forearm, flashing back to my fall in the Fiery Furnace 18 months ago. This time, I practically bounced off the pine needles and hopped back onto my feet, and dusted off the dirt, but not before they both noticed. My daughter raced back to check on me. I assured them both that I was totally fine. But I silently asked myself, is it age? Lack of attention? Terrain challenge? Or could there be a deep core muscle that is no longer engaging properly?

Olallie Lake Wading

After brushing off from my fall, we continued along the west side of Olallie Lake, scoping out campsites for a future backpacking trip. At a nice sunny vacant spot, we stopped to have lunch and clean away the rest of the dirt. Beautiful tiny butterflies flitted around our packs. They were so light I couldn’t even feel the one that perched on my hand.

A frog near Olallie Lake's shore, enjoying the day. — A frog near Olallie Lake’s shore, enjoying the day.

When I invited them to go in the water, Ajax stayed on shore. He can swim but only if someone carries him in and lets go. We decided he should stay dry.

The view south from one of the northern campsites. We backtracked to get closer to the water.

The water is, as you’d expect, cold. But also delightfully refreshing. When I spotted a frog, my daughter grabbed her camera to take some photos. An item that would have been useful: a towel. I never bring one for day hikes, but for an overnight near a lake, it would come in handy. Since we still had a second lake to explore, we dried off our feet and headed back toward the log jam at Talapus Lake roughly 1.5 miles away.

Talapus Lake Log Jam

Olallie has a decent wading area with a sandy bottom. Talapus Lake has floating logs. Brooke and Zach both wanted to test their balancing skills. When they asked how much time we had (they wanted to take their shoes off there, as well) I said we could stay longer if they’d entertain me in traffic on the way home. While they hurled sticks into the lake, I found a spot next to Ajax to write in my journal.

The choice to linger meant adding time in the car on the drive home. The closer we got to rush hour, the more time I guessed we’d spend stuck in road construction between exits 24 and 18 westbound on Interstate 90. But because we expected it, we entertained ourselves on the drive by playing The Alphabet Game and looking for interesting license plates and bumper stickers.

The Alpine Lakes wilderness is full of fascinating trees. This "seat" was perfect for Brooke and Ajax. — The Alpine Lakes wilderness is full of fascinating trees. This “seat” was perfect for Brooke and Ajax.

Ajax spotted several bold chipmunks. He didn't give chase but the drool showed he wanted to. — Ajax spotted several bold chipmunks. He didn’t give chase but the drool showed he wanted to.

Choosing Between Talapus and Olallie Lakes

The best things about these two lakes are they’re close enough to visit both on the same hike. If you park at the Pratt Lake trailhead, you’ll reach Olallie first. Both are worth seeing. As to which is better, I didn’t raise that question. Frogs or logs? Which do you prefer?

Tree planter near the trailhead. Young kids will enjoy the diversity of tree shapes on this trail.

Featured

How to Enjoy Rain on a Hike to Wallace Falls

On Father’s Day, my husband, our daughter, a friend from Arizona, and Ajax joined me for a hike to Wallace Falls. Mother Nature supplied plenty of rain, mist, and sun breaks along with plenty of puddles. The result? One very muddy dog. Fortunately, the hail waited until the long stop-and-go drive home. As a fair-weather hiker, I’ve recently come to enjoy rain because it provides cooler weather, a lower risk of sunburn, great photo opportunities (clouds make for interesting light), and fewer people. All contributed to a unique experience.

Wallace Falls is spectacular this time of year. It reminded me of being in a rainforest. Mist rebounds from the cascade, filling the valley. Or is that rain?

Uh-oh!

The last time Ajax and I visited this park was on a hike to Wallace Lake two years ago (see my blog post from August 2021). This year, a sign outside the parking lot declared it to be full, but we soon realized that was probably the case for a crowded and sunnier afternoon the day before. We quickly found a suitable parking spot in the half-full lot and traded sneakers for boots.

Missing Boots

Except somehow, my daughter’s boots never made it into my husband’s car. I had a second, older pair in my car, but she doesn’t wear my size. Would we have to turn right around and go home without taking a step?

Fortunately, my daughter and husband wear the same size. He offered to hike in his sneakers so she could wear his boots. The lightweight slip-ons she wore on the drive never would have held up to a mile of mud, much less six. Crisis averted, we locked the car and headed up the trail at 9 a.m.

Group photo of me, Zach, Ajax, and Brooke at the start of the Woody Trail, our route to Wallace Falls.

No Raincoat

Our guest, Zach, and his parents were my hiking partners for the wonderful learning experience on Mt. Wrightson in Arizona. I knew he would be fine on whatever hike we chose. But he’s used to Arizona sun and heat. They don’t have many waterfalls or lakes. The thought of bringing a raincoat never crossed his mind.

No boots for one; no raincoat for another. In typical motherly fashion, I ruminated about how my daughter was doing up at the front of our group in her borrowed footwear. Did our guest have enough snacks and warm clothing? Was my husband actually enjoying his Father’s Day in the rain, or merely tolerating it? Surely we’d faced the worst.

Baby Grouse Chicks

I was wrong.

To avoid being pulled into muddy puddles, I let Ajax off-leash. He’s usually very good with voice commands. Unless he spots a mother grouse with baby chicks.

Majestic Ajax in his muddy harness. This was taken off the beaten trail, where we could access Wallace River before it plunges over the falls.

Strike three. Fortunately, I believe the baby grouse will survive. But we revoked Ajax’s off-leash privileges for the rest of the day.

Let Nature Be Your Teacher

As we ducked into the forest, we traded the annoying buzz of power lines for the refreshing sounds of cascading water. Ajax and I paused to capture a photo of the William Wordsworth quote that greets guests to the solace and beauty of the park.

Ajax seems to enjoy rain. Here he stands in a puddle at the base of the sign. He got two baths after the hike, a cold one at the trailhead and a warm one at home.

On the rainy hike, my husband and Zach traded stories and questions until we paused at the picnic shelter for our first snack break: kibble for Ajax, homemade cookies for the kids, and ground beef for my husband. I chose to visit the vantage point for the lower falls. The volume of water flowing this time of year is truly mind-boggling.

Zach later admitted that his experience at Wallace Falls was “otherworldly.” Hiking in mud and rain must have felt as different for him as hiking in the arid Arizona April heat had been for me. Nature is an awesome teacher, if we’ll only pay attention to her lessons.

Brooke and Zach shoot photos of Lower Falls.

Enjoy Rain Mixed with Sun

People often joke about Pacific Northwest weather: if you don’t like it, wait a few minutes. We felt the air around us warm as we hiked higher and tried to figure out why that was. My guess is the clouds were growing thinner, which meant more of the sun’s strength could reach Earth. We paused at each vantage point for photos, continuing all the way to the bridge that crosses Wallace River where we spent time gazing at the rushing torrent beneath us and exploring off-trail down to the river.

On our return to the Upper Falls after exploring the bridge at the top, we got rewarded briefly by a visit from the sun.

The bridge at the very top of Wallace River. Note the very wet wood.

Now, we can look back at our experience and laugh about those things we forgot and about our soggy doggy. (I offered to sit next to Ajax so our guest could sit in the front.) Trips are made far more memorable whenever obstacles are thrown in our path.

We’ve also rediscovered that the westbound single-lane highway east of Everett is a headache to travel on weekends. It was true three years ago. Maybe even more so now.

However, we salvaged the drive home with a Word Chain game in which we chose a category (geography) and round-robin fashion, had a person name a geographic feature and the next person come up with something starting with the letter the previous person ended with. And did I mention hail?

Enjoy rain but hope for the sun. It made a brief entrance shortly before noon.

Enjoy Rain: Takeaways

The Mountaineers organization recommends that every hiker carry the Ten Essentials (or the updated “ten essential systems“) on the trail. These include extra food and water, a First Aid kit, extra clothing, and a map and compass for navigation.

It’s one thing to think you have it and another to have it. One strategy to use to avoid our mistake is to check with all party members ahead of time to be sure they actually brought what they need so that you avoid a painful surprise at the trailhead.

And we’re going to keep hiking in the rain in the summer. With the right gear, it provides a pleasant experience and interesting lighting. What “close calls” have you had in the mountains and what creative ways did you handle it? Please share in the comments so we can all benefit and learn.

Featured

How to Coax New Hikers at Annette Lake

Now that my daughter and I have joined forces to hike together this summer, I have adjusted our process. How many rests do we need? How long should each rest be so it restores us without leaving either of us cold? What is the best way to keep younger hikers interested and occupied? For that matter, when older hikers grow tired, can we coax more mileage from them? How much mileage and gain is too much? Since last Thursday’s visit to Annette Lake, I compiled a list of tips to coach and coax new hikers forward.

One way to coax new hikers is to stop to take frequent photo breaks. These beautiful falls are easily accessible, only .2 miles from the Annette Lake parking lot.

Coax New Hikers by Giving Them a Choice

Regardless of age, hikers will likely have more success on their outings if they are involved in choosing (and getting excited about) a destination. Before each hike, I ask my daughter what she’s interested in seeing. We use the WTA hikes finder to locate suitable hikes that include lakes.

From her baseline hike to Teneriffe Falls, we also have a better understanding of what elevation gain and mileage will be comfortable for her. We compiled a list of appropriate hikes from which she can choose based on the weather and how she feels on any given day.

Stunning trillium kissed by water droplets.

Hikes Under 8 Miles and Less Than 2000′ Elevation Gain

Here’s our shortlist (in alphabetical order) of Pacific Northwest hikes east of Seattle that we plan to visit this summer. All are between 5 and 8 miles and involve 1000′ to 2000′ elevation gain.

Annette Lake 7.5 miles 1800′ elevation gain (Blog 96)
Grand Ridge Park 7 miles, 1100′ elevation gain near Exit 20 off I-90
Lake 22 5.4 miles, 1350′ elevation gain on the Mountain Loop Highway
Margaret’s Way and Debbie’s View on Squak Mountain, 6.5 miles, 1500′ elevation gain near Exit 15 (Blog 99)
Mirror Lake 7 miles, 1180′ elevation gain near the PCT at Exit 54
Poo Poo Point on Tiger Mountain, 7.2 miles, 1748′ elevation gain near Exit 20 off I-90
Snow Lake 7.2 miles 1800′ gain near Exit 52
Talapus and Olallie Lakes 6.2 miles, 1220′ elevation gain near Exit 47 (this week’s trip, Blog 98)
Teneriffe Falls 5.6 miles 1585′ elevation gain and our first trip together (Blog 95)
Wallace Falls 5.6 miles, 1300′ elevation gain (our Father’s Day trip, Blog 97) on US 2

Trail maintenance crews did a lot of work on the Annette Lake trail in 2022. They installed 288 steps (by my count) including a series of "crib ladders" such as these to improve footing. — Trail maintenance crews did a lot of work on the Annette Lake trail in 2022. They installed 288 steps (by my count) including a series of “crib ladders” such as these to improve footing.

Take Frequent Breaks

Another way to coax newer hikers forward is to plan frequent breaks. From our first hike together (as well as from decades of experience) I know that taking a short clothing and water break about 15-20 minutes into the hike allows an assessment of how everyone feels. With young kids that may be more like every 10 minutes.

Our modified plan is to check in with each other every 20-30 minutes. Sometimes when I’m alone with Ajax, I’ll go a whole hour before taking a water break.

My UW Husky student and I pose for a selfie in front of the lower falls.

No Regrets

After what felt like the umpteenth switchback, I could tell my daughter was getting tired. It was chilly and damp, and she had less oomph than she did on our previous hike to Teneriffe Falls. I used the phrase, “Just a little farther!” one too many times, and she ground to a halt. I figured that 52 minutes was close enough to an hour to merit a longer rest.

At that point, my daughter asked if I regretted inviting her to join me. I was shocked. “Absolutely not!” I replied. Her question reminded me that there’s more to communication than words. Could I be sending out vibes she’d misinterpreted? I joined her on the log. While I may long for the carefree pace I set whenever I go alone, I can do that anytime. But hiking with her is a rare gift that I wouldn’t trade for anything.

Demonstrate Proper Pacing

A mistake new hikers sometimes make is starting from the cars too hard or too fast, resulting in early fatigue. Just like any warmup to a workout, try suggesting easing into the hike for the first half mile. This allows the muscles, tendons, ligaments, and joints plenty of warm-up time before sustained exertion. Then, after removing a layer of clothing, you can settle into your “go forever” pace.

My daughter has demonstrated that she does not like to be the last member in a hike. If she can’t be part of a “kid sandwich” (i.e. adult – child – adult) then she would rather be out front. My goal in upcoming hikes will be to try to teach her suitable pacing (e.g. no sprint/stop allowed) without requiring that she walk behind me. Maybe we can find hikes with wide trails.

On a rainy midweek morning with low traffic, we feel confident letting Ajax off-leash and relying on voice command. Maybe in this case she still feels a sense of a "kid sandwich" with Ajax in the lead and me taking up the rear. — On a rainy midweek morning with low traffic, we feel confident letting Ajax off-leash and relying on voice command. Maybe in this case she still feels a sense of a “kid sandwich” with Ajax in the lead and me taking up the rear.

Coax New Hikers by Providing Suitable Rewards

As we learned two summers ago on a trip to Mt. Catherine, when the huckleberries and blueberries were ripe and abundant, having some sort of reward can go a long way toward motivating a newer hiker. The promise of reaching snow in June was a big lure.

Suitcase doggie! My daughter and Ajax pose on a snow patch that persists into early summer. One way to coax new hikers is to promise something they'll enjoy. Snow, lakes, and an uncommon treat work for my daughter. — Suitcase doggie! My daughter and Ajax pose on a snow patch that persists into early summer. One way to coax new hikers is to promise something they’ll enjoy. Snow, lakes, and an uncommon treat work for my daughter.

When our daughter was young, it was the promise of ice cream afterward. On this trip, I brought out crisp snap pea chips. We spent half an hour at the lake before we both got a little cold.

As soon as the activity itself becomes a reward, you know you’ve got a hiker for life. The fact that we have our next two outings lined up means that all those outings years ago with the Mountaineers Family Activities group have created strong roots. I couldn’t be happier. If you have tips for coaching or coaxing the newer hiker, please share them in the comments so we can all learn from each other.

Selfie at the lake. What's not to love? — Selfie at the lake. What’s not to love?

Featured

Look for Good at Teneriffe Falls

A reader recently asked for tips on dealing with loss and disappointment. The permits for a trip she had been planning for six months got canceled, making it difficult to maintain enthusiasm for her trip. Loss comes in all shapes and sizes. It includes injury, illness, change in plans, loss of livelihood, loss of youthfulness, and even death. After nearly two years of exploring change, the best suggestion I can make is to look for good to come out of the loss.

Look for good. Instead of complaining about the rain, we celebrated the fact that the rain meant fewer people on a weekend hike and beautiful photographs like this one.

Weekend Hike to Teneriffe Falls

Last Saturday my daughter, Ajax, and I headed to Teneriffe Falls (6 miles, 1600′ gain) at Exit 32 on I-90. The drive has never passed so quickly. I usually listen to an e-book. Instead, we chatted easily about her coursework, the upcoming hike, her friends, and my clients.

When we started hiking around 8:30, the parking lot was about a third full. A trail maintenance crew was preparing for a day of work. Several Portapotties stood near locked latrines. And a large flat rock held numerous poop bags, indicating recent high canine traffic. Expect lots of people. It’s a Saturday in June.

Ajax and my daughter begin the steep switchbacks toward the Falls.

I’ve been so conditioned to go at dawn on weekdays to less frequented trails, that I have forgotten what it’s like to hike with hordes of people. (side note: If you seek solitude, avoid Rattlesnake Ledge on a summer weekend.) When my daughter pointed out bleeding hearts, banana slugs, and nurse logs, my heart swelled with pride. She still remembers much of what we taught her during her childhood hikes.

Loss or Gain?

Over the past year, I have explored what it’s like to move forward with an “empty nest.” Sort of. My daughter attends a local university and often comes home for a few days. We’ve adjusted to weekdays without her, and weekends with her. Now that she is home for the summer, we’re adjusting again. The biggest change: she wants to join me hiking.

How could this ever be perceived as a loss? You can view any change as having loss and gain. For instance, hiking with another person means a loss of freedom to go at my own pace. To leave the house when I want. Hiking on the weekends also brings a loss of solitude on the trail and a loss of time due to higher traffic in the city.

We dubbed this the "mystical corridor" with its pine needles, fog, and empty space. The rain kept the weekend crowds to a minimum except at the Falls where a large group of rowdy students celebrated their recent graduation. — We dubbed this the “mystical corridor” with its pine needles, fog, and empty space. The rain kept the weekend crowds to a minimum except at the Falls where a large group of rowdy students celebrated their recent graduation.

But it also brings plenty of good. Wonderful conversations with another person. New perspectives. Varied pace. Exploration and adventure of a different kind. Moments of pride when you realize your daughter has absorbed all sorts of lessons from childhood. It depends entirely on how you frame it.

Ask yourself: are you a “glass half full” or “glass half empty” person? What if you tried to look at your loss through a lens of self-compassion and kindness, or tried to view your experience as a new learning opportunity?

Look for Good: Problem as Learning Opportunity

When my daughter insisted on a third break on the ascent, she needed to check her feet. She had hot spots on her heels that threatened to form blisters. I reminded myself of my biggest intention. Make sure she has fun so she agrees to hike again. I channeled the patience my friends showed me on Mt. Wrightson when I experienced heat exhaustion.

The joy on my daughter's face, when we reached the Falls, was worth the three rest stops it took to get there. I thought back to all the hikes we did with her as a youngster. Now that she's an adult, she's come full circle. I couldn't be happier. — The joy on my daughter’s face, when we reached the Falls, was worth the three rest stops it took to get there. I thought back to all the hikes we did with her as a youngster. Now that she’s an adult, she’s come full circle. I couldn’t be happier.

I asked myself, What’s good about this problem?

Learning how to lace boots properly and adjust for uphill or downhill
Layering socks correctly to prevent wear on the skin
Learning to doctor hot spots before they become blisters
Making sure to carry Moleskin, duct tape, or Bandaids in a First Aid kit.

Experience is one of the best teachers. I doubt she’ll ever hike again without bringing blister protection.

Near the bottom of the hike, I was relieved to see my daughter was still able to smile. We're off to another hike in the morning. She had a good enough experience (and the blisters were only a minor irritant) that she's willing to go again. — Near the bottom of the hike, I was relieved to see my daughter was still able to smile. We’re off to another hike in the morning. She had a good enough experience (and the blisters were only a minor irritant) that she’s willing to go again.

Look for Good When Losses Are Ubiquitous

Earlier this week it felt like every email I opened pointed to some kind of loss. Lost mobility that led to canceling a trip. Illness meant cutting a trip short. A fall that led to a trip to the ER. A friend reporting death of a friend. Loss of enjoyment due to pain. Loss of awareness while driving. And the death of a former client’s tentmate on Everest. Pain and loss everywhere.

Where’s the good? Two jumped out at me:

I have finally learned to hold suffering at a distance and not take other people’s pain on myself. I can remain compassionate and empathetic but not drown in the pain. Win!
Maybe I could write a blog about it that might help others find a path through loss.

The author, her daughter, and Ajax enjoy an hour at Teneriffe Falls before hiking down. If you go on a summer weekend, choose a rainy day to cut down on crowds. That will also make the falls more spectacular.

Additional Posts on Loss

I’ve written about loss in other blog posts. This list is not exhaustive, but it might point to some interesting reading if you’re relatively new to the blog.

Surviving a broken wrist in the Fiery Furnace at Arches National Park
Accomplishing your goal, and handling anticipointment (the disappointment of losing anticipation of a goal you’ve held for a long time)
Slowing down to find joy in simple pleasures
How to let go: lessons from cultivating raspberries
How to learn from alpine autumn changes

A hike with two of my favorite living creatures on this planet. WIN!

Parting Thoughts

My parting thoughts are about Kelly Clarkson’s blockbuster song, “Stronger.” To paraphrase, what doesn’t kill us builds our RESILIENCE. A hero’s journey is filled with obstacles. We can bury our heads in the sand, smother our pain with food or alcohol, or we can face the pain and go right through it. If we look for what good might come out of it — connecting with others also experiencing the loss, having a different kind of adventure, getting more clarity on our goals and values — we can handle the pain more easily.

If you have recently experienced some sort of loss, please share it so we can all learn from and help each other. You are not alone. And if you have a topic you’d like to explore, please suggest it. A shout out to E. for asking this question, and to my Monday Morning writing partners for a wonderful, lively discussion of the Murky Middle blog post. I learn so much from all of my readers and commenters! Thank you!

Featured

Murky Middle: How to Follow Through on Intentions

During the past four rambles with Ajax, I reflected on our progress on our project. Is it still meeting its purpose? Am I experiencing “shiny object syndrome” (i.e. wanting to jump to something else midstream) or just the murky middle that sometimes comes with long-term projects? What are some ways to follow through on intentions?

Ajax explores a driftwood structure at Richmond Beach Saltwater Park.

Pinehurst Pocket Park

Doubt started creeping up on me during the Memorial Day weekend. My daughter was home for three days so I had some free time. I refused to battle holiday crowds in the mountains, so Ajax and I did a local Ramble instead.

We included a stop at Pinehurst Pocket Park, a tiny park covering less than half a city block. But despite visiting six little free libraries, something was missing. I long for solitude, for views, for the freedom to let Ajax roam off-leash. I miss the mountains. What would finishing 52 unique rambles do for me that hiking wouldn’t? Was I ready to change my intentions? Or maybe I was just having an off day. Perhaps my attitude would change when I tried a few more.

A great way for a local homeowner to showcase a sense of humor. Dogs can't read but they sure can smell! — A great way for a local homeowner to showcase a sense of humor. Dogs can’t read but they sure can smell!

View Ridge Playfield

A few days later, I returned my daughter to the UW campus for finals week. On the way back, Ajax and I visited the View Ridge Playfield neighborhood. It brought back memories of summer visits to the kiddie pool when my daughter was a toddler.

We visited three little free libraries on this ramble, including one outside the Sand Point Community United Methodist Church, constructed to resemble the church itself. I marveled at all of the modern architecture in the neighborhood. At the same time, I felt crowded and confined, with people rushing from birthday parties to the library to local coffee and bagel shops.

Sand Point Community Church boasts two neighborhood boxes, one for books and one for food. Both resemble the church.

The view from 70th Ave. NE looking east toward the Cascades. A block west, you can see a similar view of the Olympics.

In a word, hectic. A feeling I escape in the mountains and try to avoid during Rambles. But the farther south I explore (i.e. closer to downtown) the more hectic the pace feels. The yearning for the peaceful solace and rhythm of the mountains grows stronger with each urban ramble, now that more people are getting outside in nice weather. Or perhaps because I was able to see the mountains without being in them.

Haller Lake in the Murky Middle

The following day, our ramble to Haller Lake in north Seattle made me want to give up. Not because of inclement weather.

We strolled clockwise around the small, private lake hoping to find a waterfront path (it doesn’t exist) or at least public access to the lake (there is only one such spot).

Haller Lake from the west. Trying to access this mostly private lake was part of my murky middle. But I can change my approach to find safe, accessible, beautiful, public spaces and continue on my quest. Simple, right?

Behind the North Seattle Church, we caught our first glimpse of the lake. Unfortunately, the only access by non-residents is on the west side. So we continued on our way, eager to spot any lingering waterfowl. So far, all we’d heard among the usual suspects were red-winged blackbirds, common inhabitants of wetlands such as Montlake Fill and Magnuson Park.

No Dogs Allowed

But as we strode toward the lake from the west, my heart dropped. A sign proclaimed No dogs allowed on Seattle beaches. A local collecting trash gave us the ol’ stink-eye.

“C’mon, Ajax, it looks like we’re not welcome here,” I said to my docile pup. He dutifully followed without a single growl or bark. I hate feeling unwelcome anywhere, but especially in green spaces touted as accessible to and for all. Apparently not dogs.

My murky middle nearly caused me to give up after 39 rambles. Decorative signs hang on the fencing leading to the public boat ramp at Haller Lake. For all they do to try to welcome people, it's the last thing I felt. — My murky middle nearly caused me to give up after 39 rambles. Decorative signs hang on the fencing leading to the public boat ramp at Haller Lake. For all they do to try to welcome people, it’s the last thing I felt.

“I don’t want to visit any more spaces that make me feel unwanted, unsafe, or uncomfortable,” I thought as we left Haller Lake.

But I had to remind myself, this was different. This was mostly a private access lake. And maybe the lady just had weird eyes. Maybe she wasn’t directing anything toward me. Perhaps the anger I felt was due to a poor, uninformed choice. But anger it was. Not one of the reasons I go on walks with Ajax.

The Desire to Quit Rears Its Ugly Head

So this morning, I told a friend that I was considering stopping my Rambles project. Surprised, she asked why. I mumbled something like, “I miss the mountains. And I miss visiting some of my favorite places where there are no people.” Both are valid reasons.

But they don’t tell the whole true story. I think I was willing to scrap my whole year-long project… in order to avoid shame. Well, eff that. That’s on ME, not anyone else. And now that I know what I was doing, I won’t cave.

Something my friend said reminded me to review my big why: this project was a way to explore mindfulness, learn to be more fully present, and experience joy in tiny moments. Haller Lake may not have been joyful but many of the others have been.

Review Your Intentions

Once she left, I reread what I hoped to get out of this year. June seems to be as good a time as any to reflect on intentions set at the start of the year.

Appreciate beauty
Connect deeply
Move frequently
Create abundantly
Improve lovingly
Challenge gently

Appreciate beauty, large and small alike.

I realized that I’d slipped on my why. And the two that need more work are “appreciate beauty” and “improve lovingly.” I have been trying to strongarm myself into going to places within walking distance of home — that may be aesthetically unappealing or worse, downright unsafe.

But what if I gave myself permission — challenged myself gently — to access green spaces beyond walking distance for my final twelve Rambles? What’s stopping me from driving to new green spaces like I do hikes?

Richmond Beach Saltwater Park

So, with renewed interest in our project (just in time for Ramble 40!), I drove to Richmond Beach Saltwater Park for a walk-and-talk with a writing friend. Connection. Check. I expected great views of the Olympics. Saltwater birds. And with any luck, no crowds.

This morning, the only people enjoying the park were dog walkers (like us) and stair climbers (also like us.) Movement. Check. We headed along the top promenade for an overlook of the park and ended up at a gorgeous Madrone tree – I think, based on the peeling bark. Beauty. Check.

Active Ajax Adventures are a great way to explore the area and get outside my comfort zone. A hiking friend convinced me to keep going and get twelve more Rambles.

My writing friend gave me several big hugs and encouraged me to continue with our quest. Twelve to go.

Takeaways: Surviving the Murky Middle

Whatever goal you are pursuing, at some point you may think, “Do I still want this? Does it matter? How can I stay interested and engaged through the finish line?” I offer some final thoughts about what might help.

New Perspective

Before you completely give up on any intention, give it a day or a week to let yourself think about it. You may be having a tough day. Things might look better with a little distance from your intention.
Review the initial reasons why you embarked on this journey in the first place. Perhaps (like it did for me) something has slipped and a reminder will jump-start you.
Discuss your decision-making process with someone who understands your struggle. They might have a fresh opinion that can help you see it in a different way.

Tweak Your Intentions

Can you tweak your intention (i.e. nudge the notch) to make it a little more compelling? For me, reminding myself that it’s okay to drive to mid-distance green spaces opens up a ton of areas to explore. Not only will I still save on gas and driving time, but the choices just got a lot more interesting.
Imagine two outcomes: completing and not completing your intention. What will each look and feel like? Will you have any regrets about your decision? What does completing (or not) your intention say about you? What good might come from completing it, even if you feel like you’re struggling? And if it’s no longer right, be comfortable walking away without shame or guilt.
Finally, if you have been working on an intention alone, find a buddy or accountability partner. They help!

If you are struggling to follow through on an intention, don’t give up! Share your dilemma in the comments so we can support each other.

Featured

How to Assess Progress on Cougar Mountain

Tuesday morning, Ajax and I explored 7.5 miles of trails on Cougar Mountain. One of the things I love about both Tiger Mountain State Forest and Cougar Mountain Regional Wildland Park with its 35 miles of winding trails is the opportunity to explore lots of different areas of the park. Our ramble gave me three hours to reflect on my Master Health Coaching class through Precision Nutrition. In particular, I wanted to think about the many ways to help clients assess progress.

A lovely canopy of moss-covered trees drapes over the path just past Cougar Pass on the way to Lost Beagle Trail. One way we assess progress is to refer to a map and signage to make sure we're heading the right way. — A lovely canopy of moss-covered trees drapes over the path just past Cougar Pass on the way to Lost Beagle Trail. One way we assess progress is to refer to a map and signage to make sure we’re heading the right way.

My intentions shortlist included the following three items:

Reflect on the use of objective and subjective data for assessing client progress
Explore new-to-us segments of Cougar Mountain’s trail system
Test two new water delivery systems I’d purchased for Ajax’s 8th birthday

Assess Progress: Objective vs. Subjective Data

During our hike, I found myself thinking about how Precision Nutrition suggests tracking progress. To help clients reach distant mountain peaks, there are some obvious, objective metrics. Guide services such as Alpine Ascents International want to be sure their climbers can reach base camp carrying a specific pack weight in a certain amount of time. If not, they might jeopardize the team’s chance to reach the summit.

Objective Data

Objective measurements include measurable facts such as:

Distance hiked
Elevation gained or altitude attained
Time traveled
Pack weight carried
Heart rate data (average, max, rate of recovery)
Steps achieved using some biometric device such as an Oura ring, Whoop strap, or Fitbit

A piece of objective data for hikers is mileage traveled. King County does an excellent job with signage. As long as you know roughly what your end destination is, you can easily get there. But a goal like "increased fitness"? Without more specific parameters, you may never know if or when you've reached it. — A piece of objective data for hikers is mileage traveled. King County does an excellent job with signage. As long as you know roughly what your end destination is, you can easily get there. But a goal like “increased fitness”? Without more specific parameters, you may never know if or when you’ve reached it.

Subjective Data

But these metrics are only part of the picture. For some people participating in unguided trips where they can take their own time, subjective metrics may actually be more important. These might include:

Feeling less winded at the top of stairs or hills
Having energy for the trip back to the car
Wanting to eat at base camp or the summit
Feeling well enough not to need any pain medication or anti-inflammatories during or after the trip
Being able to recover quickly once exercise stops
Feeling like they can continue the very next day without much rest
Have a conversation with a partner on the way up or down
Having an easier time than the previous hike

Subjective data are harder to quantify. They are specific to each person and based more on internal feelings rather than external metrics. Such criteria often have more meaning for the hiker.

Ajax crosses a wooden bridge on the Tibbets Marsh Trail on the way to Cougar Pass. I assess his progress by his energy levels and panting.

Assess Progress Using a Continuum

If something can’t be measured, how exactly do you gauge improvement? The short answer is: scaling, or using relative comparison on a continuum.

Take the first example given in “subjective data.” If you do a hike one week and it takes you fifteen minutes of sitting on a rock, panting, at the turn-around point before you feel like you can start again, and the next week it only takes you five minutes (for similar effort/exertion), and you stand for most of that, you have shown “much improvement.”

Whether you use a scale of 1 to 3, 1 to 10, or 1 to 100 doesn’t matter so much. And the exact number (which would mean you’re looking at objective data) also may not matter. What matters is feeling better than last time for comparable effort. We’re after improvement.

How do you track your own progress? Is your way helpful? Or do you beat yourself up over a higher-than-expected heart rate and slower-than-desired pace? Could you use a better way to gauge improvement? One that matters to you?

Water for Ajax

For several years, I’ve been providing Ajax treats on the trail in a collapsible silicone food and water bowl, but the ribs have collected some unidentifiable, unappealing substance that won’t scrub off. Ajax deserves better. For his eighth birthday, I bought several hydration systems for us to test.

A plastic Lesotc 2022 allows the remaining water to return to the bottle. It comes with a mini-carabiner for attaching to your pack. One fatal design flaw requires sticking your fingers into the water to secure a plug after filling the cup. I opted to maintain squeeze pressure while he drank. Unfortunately, when I let go mid-lap, the slurp of the draining water startled him. Product fail.

Despite numerous water delivery options, Ajax still prefers the old-fashioned way: fresh from the stream. — Despite trying numerous water delivery options, Ajax still prefers the old-fashioned way: fresh from the stream.

The second was a Gology insulated 32-ounce thermos, complete with a carrying case, detachable food and water bowls, a slot for a phone or wallet, and a screw-on cup. The unit is completely dishwasher compatible, which was my main objection to the silicone bowls. But at two pounds, I’m still skeptical. The verdict? You might have guessed. Ajax prefers running water from a stream.

Assess Progress During Exploration

Having successfully tested the two hydration systems, our third objective was to explore the park. Once you know the main route in any park, it’s fun to get off the beaten path and see what else the park or mountain has to offer.

Our route took us up Big Tree Ridge Trail for about a mile (in the northeastern-most corner of the park marked by “You are Here”). We immediately turned left and wandered along the following trails: Military, Precipice Top, Surprise Creek, No Name, Shangri-La, Protector, Tibbetts Marsh, Cougar Pass, Klondike Swamp, Lost Beagle, and finally ended up at the parking lot at the Harvey Manning Trailhead.

Solace and Problem-Solving

The wonderful thing about starting a hike midweek at 6 a.m. is — you guessed it — solitude! We shared the trail with two trail runners, a pair of women hikers starting as we finished, 19 bird species, a mole, a mouse, squirrels, and a chipmunk.

But perhaps one of my favorite reasons to hike is to give my brain a rest from helping guide clients solve challenging problems. Hiking becomes a form of walking meditation. I may start using the subjective metric of “feeling emotionally better at the end of a hike than when I started.”

May all of you find solace in your own exploration. And if you have a metric you use that I haven’t written about here, please share so we can all benefit.

Featured

How To Make Good Decisions on Dirty Harry’s Peak

Last Thursday, Ajax and I explored the trifecta destinations of Dirty Harry’s Peak, Dirty Harry’s Balcony, and Dirty Harry’s Museum at Exit 38 along Washington State’s I-90. This hike reminded me of the diverse factors that go into how to make good decisions for your party, whether that includes twelve hikers or your dog.

The trailhead has a nice map that I used to gauge the approximate locations of the Museum and the Peak. I also discovered there was a lake on the map, Granite Lake, which I'd never noticed before (top, blue). — The trailhead has a nice map that I used to gauge the approximate locations of the Museum and the Peak. I also discovered there was a lake on the map, Granite Lake, which I’d never noticed before (top, blue).

Which Hike?

Obviously, a dog doesn’t have a direct vote in which hike to do, but Ajax’s comfort IS always an important consideration whenever I plan an outing. Especially since these Active Ajax Adventures were designed as a way for us to enjoy the outdoors together.

When we hiked Mt. Washington the week before, Dirty Harry loomed directly across the highway from us. Since there is still plenty of snow on trails at Exit 47, we’ve been hiking farther west. Why not compare the north-facing slopes of Mt. Washington with the south-facing slopes of Dirty Harry’s Peak? We arrived at the Dirty Harry’s Peak parking lot early enough to start hiking at 6:10 a.m. The earlier, the cooler, the better for us both.

There are plenty of great vantage points all along the hike. Catching this view of McClellan Butte reminded me that I haven't visited it in over twenty years. Maybe within the next month! — There are plenty of great vantage points on the way to the Balcony. Catching this view of McClellan Butte reminded me that I haven’t visited it in over twenty years. Maybe next month!

Make Good Decisions About Where to Stop

The next decision was where to take our first break. We could visit one, two, or all three destinations, separate hikes in their own right: Dirty Harry’s Balcony (4.4 miles and 1,600 feet of gain), Dirty Harry’s Museum (5.6 miles and 2,800 feet of gain), and Dirty Harry’s Peak (9.2 miles and 3,326 feet of gain). I wasn’t sure Ajax would be comfortable visiting all three — he is, after all, wearing a fur coat in this heat — so we stopped at The Balcony first.

Dawn (7 a.m.) looking eastward over I-90 from Dirty Harry's Balcony at Exit 38. — Dawn (7 a.m.) looking eastward over I-90 from Dirty Harry’s Balcony at Exit 38.

Having settled into a nice rhythm of water breaks every 45 minutes, we continued through the lush woods to mile 2.8 where we reached the fast-running Museum Creek. In a trip report I’d read the day before, another hiker suggested using poles to cross. I had found a suitable stick (my pole sat forgotten in the car) in case I needed one. But how would Ajax do?

Where to Cross?

I never want to take any unnecessary risks that would jeopardize my partner’s safety. I thought about securing his leash to his “suitcase harness” so I could grab him more easily if he slipped on the wet rocks. The last thing I wanted was for him to tumble downhill out of reach. At the edge of the racing water, we stood assessing the flow. I couldn’t find any “obvious way” across.

Nope. Too risky.

I actually turned us around. Maybe we could explore the Museum or check out the Ira Spring Connector closer to the Balcony.

The stream is a raging river right now. I didn't see an obvious, safe way across where Ajax stood so I turned us around. — Museum Creek is a raging river right now. I didn’t see an obvious, safe way across where Ajax stood so I turned us around.

Once Ajax stood safely beside me, however, I glanced around. Several rock “islands” stuck out to the left (low) of the fastest part of the stream. Maybe we could cross there.

With Ajax watching on the bank, I carefully made my way across several large pieces of wood someone had placed on top of stones. Safely across, I turned and called Ajax.

Heart in my throat, I watched as he paused and shook out his nervousness. Then, determined not to be left behind, he promptly joined me.

Relieved that we’d made it across, I gave him lots of lavish “good boy!” praise. As we continued, I wondered whether the continued snow melt would cause us greater difficulty on the way back. We’d literally have to “cross that bridge” when we came to it. Onward, to find snow.

Happy author selfie. Anything that gets me outdoors to fresh air, birdsong, solitude, and beauty makes me smile. And when I think we've reached our turnaround point but I find a safe way forward, I'm even happier. — Happy author selfie. Anything that gets me outdoors to fresh air, birdsong, solitude, and beauty makes me smile. And when I think we’ve reached our turnaround point but I find a safe way forward, I’m even happier.

Make Good Decisions About How Long to Rest

At a lovely spot half a mile beyond the stream crossing, we took a ten-minute break. I felt pretty confident we would not see any other hikers behind us. After all, only dedicated and experienced hikers would brave that stream crossing. And only insane people would be up this high so early!

Several large trees have been carved into lovely benches where hikers can sit and enjoy the view. We were almost to the steepest part, so I gave Ajax a snack and some water while I shot several photos.

The author's selfie was taken while reclining on a carved tree bench roughly 1.5 miles from the summit. — The author’s selfie was taken while reclining on a carved tree bench roughly 1.5 miles from the summit.

Recharged, we easily stepped across numerous small stream crossings, covering the last 1.5 miles pretty comfortably. The trail includes some unrelenting switchbacks, and we reached snow about .5-.75 miles from the summit for the rest of the hike.

Where to Enjoy the Views?

From Dirty Harry’s Peak, you can look north, west, or south. The day we hiked, smoke from Canadian wildfires obscured most of Mt. Rainier to the south. My DSLR 100-400 mm lens would have been useless. Glad I didn’t carry it!

For our summit visit, we found a shaded spot on the far west end of the ridge where the snow had already melted. Ajax promptly plopped down to relax. I pulled out my foam sit pad and reclined, looking into the blue sky. As soon as I’d gotten comfortable, a gray jay (or ‘camp robber’, as some people call them) ventured close enough for a good shot on my phone.

Ajax approves of our summit spot out of the sun.

A gray jay joins us hoping for handouts.

After enjoying the views for half an hour, I packed everything up and we made our way to the “other summit” to check out the view to the north. I hoped we could see Glacier Peak and Mt. Baker; the haze made that impossible. But we spotted a lake I later identified as rounded Granite Lake, straight below us, with snow patches in places.

Granite Lake is due north of Dirty Harry's Peak. — Granite Lake is due north of Dirty Harry’s Peak.

A melting snow bridge near the north summit.

My stomach dropped when I noticed what Ajax was standing on. Below him, the narrow snow bridge was rapidly melting. If it gave way… Fortunately, Ajax responds to my voice commands. He abruptly trotted to my side to lavish praise. Now, at the halfway point, we had to get down safely. The toughest part would be that stream.

Should We Include A Side Trip?

The trip down included interesting exchanges with eighteen single or paired hikers headed up. “Cross low,” I told them about the stream. I winced when I spotted a snake slithering across the trail in front of me. Fortunately, Ajax was exploring something behind me and didn’t see it.

There was also the issue of crossing Museum Creek again. We heard running water before we saw it. And twenty paces from it, Ajax came to an abrupt halt. Did he remember the first time? Could I coax him across again? I gave him another water and food break (lucky dog!) He’d done it before; could he do it again?

In order to make good decisions about this stream crossing, I had to look for an alternate route. Ajax succeeded with his second stream crossing at 10:30 a.m.

With a little coaxing, he scampered right across the stream, choosing his own way, reminding me of the pair of mountain goats I’d spotted on Dirtybox Peak situated between Mailbox and Dirty Harry’s Peak. Relieved and feeling invincible, I searched for the north turnoff for Dirty Harry’s Museum.

Dirty Harry’s Museum

There is no sign for the “entry” into the woods like there is for the trail itself. A small rock cairn sits on a large boulder directly across from a dark narrow opening in the trees. And once you enter the opening and head steeply upward, there are bright ribbons marking the way.

Ajax followed me for several minutes until the trail met the stream and opened up to Harry Gault’s rusty truck. I’ve only visited this particular destination once before, so we took a few minutes to explore the truck before heading down in earnest.

Harry Gault's truck, what is known as Dirty Harry's Museum. — Harry Gault’s truck, what is known as Dirty Harry’s Museum.

Make Good Decisions: When Enough Is Enough

Once we returned to Dirty Harry’s Balcony around 11:15, I stopped for Ajax to have the rest of his kibble. I could tell his energy after visiting all three destinations. I paused to enjoy birdsong and chatted with another hiker until it looked like Ajax was ready. Only two miles to go! I estimated that keeping on our pace, we’d reach the car by 12:30.

But my pooped pup had had more than enough. A mile from the car he plopped down and wouldn’t go any farther. I considered carrying him but I knew that would just result in both of us being exhausted. So instead, I pulled out my sit pad, found a good rest spot, and let him take a brief nap.

No. More. Momma. When Ajax plops down and refuses to go on, I know he's reached his limit, much like I did on Mt. Wrightson. In order to make good decisions, consider all in your party. I knew all we could do is take a break. — No. More. Momma. When Ajax plops down and refuses to go on, I know he’s reached his limit, much like I did on Mt. Wrightson. In order to make good decisions, consider all in your party. I knew all we could do is take a break.

After a fifteen-minute break, he’d stopped panting, but he still lagged behind me. I finally secured his leash to his harness and coaxed him down to the car. He’d clearly reached his max.

Takeaways

As we head into summer, some of my top takeaways from this experience include the following tips:

Consider all party members’ strengths and weaknesses. I plan early morning trips so Ajax will be more comfortable. And if the forecast is for temperatures much above 75 degrees Fahrenheit, we stay local.
Choose destinations wisely. Granite Mountain and Dirty Harry’s Peak are two trails I’ve decided are best done with Ajax in the fall or spring when there is plenty of snowmelt or cooler temperatures from shade and cloud cover.
Consider destinations with rivers or lakes to cool off when it gets hot.
Study trip reports on such websites as Washington Trails Association to learn about conditions ahead of time. Knowing the stream was running high helped me be prepared both with a stick and with alternatives.
Be okay with changing the destination – go farther or shorten the trip depending on party preparation.
Listen to your party members, canine or human. If they show signs of needing a break, provide one. Pressing on may only make matters worse.

What top takeaways can you share about any of your recent learning experiences in the mountains? Share them in the comments so we can all benefit.

Featured

Mt. Washington: How to Set Intentions

My recent adventures on Mt. Wrightson (in SE Arizona) had me wondering how my next hike in the Cascades would go. Last week Ajax and I hiked one of my favorite trails, Mt. Washington. I wanted to apply newly learned lessons in familiar conditions. The mountains were calling and I had to go… But this time, I set intentions that were different from my usual hikes.

The views of Mt. Rainier are breathtaking from many of the hikes along the I-90 corridor, including Mt. Washington, one of my favorite Cascades hikes.

Micro Intentions

I can hear you now. You’re probably remembering another post on intentions that I wrote at the start of the year. And you would be correct. That post addressed big-picture intentions (what some call “goals.”) You can use the same principle for small, daily objectives as well.

Often when I hike, I go wherever my mind and body suggest would be the most fun on any given day. Variables to consider might include weather, time, distance, elevation gain, and whether it’s a good place for shade, streams, snow, or solitude. Rattlesnake Ledge tops the list of places to avoid, as there are usually two dogs for every five people, a steady stream like ants on an anthill. Not the solitary wilderness experience we desire.

One of my set intentions for this trip was to include regular snack breaks. Ajax seemed to approve of this change.

Sample Intentions

I chose Mt. Washington. But not for reasons you might think. You can set intentions before you leave the house, or you can wait until you pull into the parking lot. An intention is an objective you want to reflect upon or work on as you hike.

Someone who usually races to the top may set an intention to be more mindful of the scenery. A hiker who feels energetic might set an intention to take fewer rest breaks. Another might want to see what happens when they change from eating a sandwich to snacking on trail mix and a protein shake. Someone else might want to try to identify five new flowers or birds. Intentions, like goals, can be anything that matters TO YOU.

The stream just beyond the Great Wall sign has overflowed the river bank, but it is still passable. A pole may help with footing. Ajax hesitated for a moment but followed me across.

My Set Intentions for May 11 Hike

Many of my clients enlist my help as their trainer to develop strength and speed. My intentions for this hike included metrics of a different kind. Based on what I learned on Mt. Wrightson, I set the following intentions:

Take two short 2-minute mind-body breaks during the first hour to adjust clothing and give Ajax water
Include a 10-minute snack break at the lake to put on traction for snow conditions if needed
Pause for 30-60 minutes at the summit to listen for birds, look for jays, take photos, and have a snack
Use the Merlin Bird ID app to see how many spring warblers and sparrows I could identify
Build my heat resilience and tolerance (we’ve had some unseasonally warm weather)
Learn what the current snowpack is like to recommend hikes for local Pacific Northwest clients

The last one was an afterthought. I’d seen WTA (Washington Trails Association) trip reports and knew we’d be on snow, but I wasn’t sure how low it started. I had microspikes, a sit pad, and a pole in case we encountered icy conditions. While I am glad I carried both, in most areas the snow is so soft you can manage without traction. A pole, however, is useful for recovering from postholes or crossing higher-than-usual streams.

The "turnstile" on the way up the last part of Mt. Washington, just beyond the lake. — The “turnstile” on the way up the last part of Mt. Washington, just beyond the lake.

Other than my Keen hiking boots, a pole and microspikes helped in the snow. My traction devices ended up coming off about ten minutes after I put them on; I decided they were more hassle than help.

Results of Our Experiment

In anticipation of swarms of people taking advantage of the unusually nice, sunny weather, we left the car at 5:30 a.m. We were the first to arrive. Each of our breaks served a specific purpose. We reached the summit with energy to spare and had there not been as much snow, we would have added a detour along the Great Wall on the descent.

We reached snow just beyond the sign that indicates the left-hand turnoff for the Great Wall. Above the river crossing, Ajax punched through in several spots. The trail has way more snow than I have seen at this time in May. With the warm weather, it should melt quickly. Expect snow in places until at least June 21.

Ajax is a real trooper. He may not appreciate the views as I do, but I sure do appreciate HIM.

Expect post-holing right now. As soon as I noticed Ajax punching through, I started to as well. We avoided tree wells and narrow snow bridges. Wherever we could, we stayed on the dirt trail so we wouldn’t unexpectedly lose our footing. At one point the trail headed straight up a steep snowy slope. Fortunately on the trip down we were able to find and stay on the switchbacks.

Brought to you by one very happy snow-loving hiker... — Brought to you by one very happy snow-loving hiker…

and her equally happy-to-rest pooch, Ajax!

Set Intentions: Become Happy Hikers

As for the results of setting intentions, we identified 17 bird species from their songs. We spotted Mt. Rainier, Mt. Baker, and Glacier Peak under some of the most brilliant blue skies ever. I came home with three times more photos than usual.

We had the mountain entirely to ourselves except for three women starting up as we returned to the car. And now I can steer clients to appropriate hikes because I have first-hand experience of how high the snowpack is. Best of all, despite adding deliberate rest stops, our pace was comparable to other hikes up the mountain. Mission accomplished!

If you have experimented with setting micro-intentions for your hikes, please feel free to share your results in the comments section so we can all pool our knowledge and learn from one another.

Featured

Valuable Lessons in Humility on Mt. Wrightson

Last week, I described a birding trip to the top of Mt. Wrightson as part of my friend Pam Keyes’ video series for female hikers over 50. Be sure to enjoy her ten-minute video that accompanies this two-part series. I never expected to receive such valuable lessons in humility on the descent.

A beautiful April day in SE Arizona. I love the way clouds cast shadows on the ridges below.

The Approach

Before we reached our lunch spot, Pam received a text from her son Zach, a Type-1 Diabetic, that his blood sugar levels needed checking. Cell service is intermittent in the Santa Rita Mountains, depending on one’s provider. I had no service until we left the mountain, but Pam’s worked fine. We’d had a similar experience in Alaska so I wasn’t all that surprised. I almost never use my phone when I ramble with Ajax in the mountains except to take pictures.

Since Pam was able to track her son’s progress, we knew he’d reach the summit before we did. At one point we received a text asking if we had turned around. With so many switchbacks, it was understandable why someone might interpret your dot as going down rather than up. She assured him we were on our way, but if he wanted to head down before we got to the summit, he could.

Ponderosa, Apache pines, and silverleaf oaks dot the landscape the higher you climb. Sycamores are more common lower in the valley. Summer fires including the Sawmill Fire (2017) and the Florida Fire (2005) often burn through wide swaths of the mountains leaving behind dramatic snags for birds to repurpose.

As we climbed steep switchbacks toward Old Baldy Saddle, the birdsong disappeared. A few turkey vultures and dozens of ravens soared on thermals. The views became more dramatic, as did the sun’s intensity. Having had a number of basal cell carcinomas removed over the years, I keep my skin covered even on hot days. I relished the few breezes that passed through on the sun-scorched slope.

Old Baldy Saddle

At Old Baldy Saddle, the wind increased. I knew we had less than a mile to go, but plenty of elevation to gain. The sight of a couple of hikers in front of us awakened my competitive spirit. Maybe I could pass them.

Pam insisted I go ahead and she’d follow. I picked up my pace, snapping photos along the way. I marveled at the terrain we’d traversed, including the winding path back to Old Baldy Saddle. A few minutes from the top, a ground squirrel stared at me, as if begging for handouts. Until that point, we had heard plenty of birds and seen a few lizards, but no mammals.

A brave ground squirrel blends in with his rocky surroundings.

Summit Experience

Around 1:30, I reached the summit. A rock ring remains the only indicator of the fire lookout tower that burned down in 1973. After greeting Zach and telling him his mom would be up shortly, I found a good spot so I could record her arrival.

Zach continued chatting with the other hikers. He looked refreshed, not at all like he’d gained 4,000 feet of elevation over 6 miles.

“We took good care of him,” several of the hikers promised, assuring us that they’d shared their sunscreen, food, and water. “He’s a good kid,” another man, Dave, added.

Panorama of the summit of Mt. Wrightson. Zach started down before us. Lessons in humility include carrying more water than you expect to need.

When Zach asked if I had any extra food, I handed him an apple. I also had an entire bag of trail mix, but the last thing I wanted to do was eat.

Lessons in Humility: Dwindling Water

Of greater concern was my dwindling water supply. In the Cascades, 3.5 liters is enough for a 15-mile hike. With my dog. With leftovers. But in SE Arizona, it only carried me halfway. As I downed my last few swallows of Keppi lemon-lime electrolytes water I remembered I still carried Pam’s completely full two-liter bag. Perhaps she could spare some.

When Dave, one of the men trading stories with Zach, offered me some water “to lighten his load,” I gratefully accepted. The ice-cold temperature made up for the bland flavor.

With a liter from Pam and another half liter generously supplied by Dave, I felt confident I’d have enough for the trip down. I also predicted that my mild headache (presumably from altitude) would abate as we descended. We probably could reach the car in two hours. Down is always faster.

Pam enjoying the summit of Mt. Wrightson.

I took several last shots with my DSLR camera. I’d carried the extra weight up, and by golly, I was going to use it! My last task was to sign the summit register. Camera and binoculars stowed, and after enjoying the summit for half an hour, we started down.

Rejoining Walt

When we reached Old Baldy Saddle we got a pleasant surprise: Walt! He had continued up from his earlier resting spot. What wasn’t a surprise was that Zach had taken the car keys and continued down alone. He struck me as a remarkably independent and capable teenager.

At the summit, I’d considered asking Pam if I could use her phone at the Saddle to let my husband know we were running long. I forgot. As we started down the sun-baked switchbacks, Pam handed me her phone. Everything changed.

The path from Old Baldy Saddle to the summit. Snow patches remain in late April at 9,000 feet elevation. Lessons in humility: know the warning signs of heat illnesses.

Lessons in Humility: Warning Signs

My headache got progressively worse, not better. I finally asked Pam if she had any painkillers. Ibuprofen is a staple in most First Aid kits, but it’s contra-indicated for me. I couldn’t come up with the word “Tylenol” to save my life. She also noticed that my face was quite red despite wearing a hat and sunscreen. Despite doing everything right, including staying hydrated, protecting sensitive skin from the sun, eating, and replacing valuable electolytes, my body needed help cooling down.

Squirrels and birds have adapted to the harsh SE AZ conditions. As a Seattleite for over 35 years, I'm used to rain and snow. I knew the heat could be an issue but I had no idea it would affect me so much. — Squirrels and birds have adapted to the harsh SE AZ conditions. As a Seattleite for over 35 years, I’m used to rain and snow. I knew the heat could be an issue but I had no idea it would affect me so much.

Bellows Spring Revisited

When we reached Bellows Spring, I grabbed the magenta scarf from my pack and soaked it in the trickle of water from the snow. That first squeeze of cool water on my face felt like I’d died and gone to heaven.

At some point, Walt reappeared (Had he waited for us? Had she texted him? Was he still recording video for her project?) Pam explained her concerns about my overheating. “We’ll just take it slow on the way down. Lots of breaks,” they said. Wait, what? I’m usually fastest on the descent. What the heck was going on?

We did THAT? A view on the way down through the woods. My phone was very low on batteries so I took precious few photos on the way down. Plus my focus was getting to the car safely.

“Put your whole hat in the stream and get it wet, too,” they suggested. Oh my goodness, pure bliss. For several minutes after that, I felt invincible. Until nausea and headache continued.

“Take your scarf off every so often so your body can get rid of the heat,” they suggested. Pam shared stories of two people she’d helped in the past who had heat stroke. One ended up in the hospital. I won’t. No more hospitals for ME!

A view of the reclamation pond. The burned slope provided little in the way of shade from the mid-afternoon sun.

Heat Illnesses

Hearing her use the word “stroke” jarred me. I knew from all my first aid training that heat cramps, heat exhaustion, and heat stroke (also known as sunstroke) are very real concerns for people unaccustomed to training in hot, arid conditions.

I am a snow girl through and through. I’ve experienced cramps before, but I couldn’t see my hot face or detect my slurred speech. I just knew I felt very warm, nauseous, headachey, and HOT. But this could definitely be heat exhaustion. If I wasn’t careful, it could deepen into something much more serious.

Resting and reflecting on my body's inability to cool itself down. Photo courtesy of Pam Keyes. — Resting and reflecting on my body’s inability to cool itself down. Photo courtesy of Pam Keyes.

When we finally reached shade, Pam suggested I remove my long-sleeved shirt and hat. She offered to take my pack. I hesitated for a split second before accepting her help. The next thing I knew, she was pouring water all over my shirt. “This will help your body cool down.”

Lessons In Humility: Accept Help

Pam asked if it would be okay to include my experience with heat exhaustion in the video. I hesitated again. What does it say about me that I had trouble on the last two miles of an 11-mile hike? Would people think less of me?

But a second later, I agreed. I looked down at my Go for Good wristband and reminded myself of my intentions to see the positives in every negative outcome. How could I turn what I perceived, in the moment, as a failure into a valuable learning experience, for myself, and for my readers? What lessons came from it?

I still maintained my sense of humor and humility and demonstrated the "Thinker's Pose" during one of my rest breaks. — I still maintained my sense of humor and humility and demonstrated the “Thinker’s Pose” during one of my rest breaks. Photo courtesy of Pam Keyes.

No matter how fit or well-prepared you are, something unexpected can still happen.
Do what you can to prevent heat illness and heed warning signs of a potential problem.
Realize that one event does not mean it will happen again, whether you experience heat or cold illness, or altitude sickness. Every trip is unique.
The scouts’ motto, “Be prepared,” applies on every trip. Expect the unexpected and you won’t be surprised.
Always carry MORE than you think you will need, especially if you don’t expect to find a water source.
Realize that when you’re at the summit you’re only halfway done. Most problems occur on the way down.
Accept help readily and graciously when someone offers. I owe Pam my life and I’d do it all again.

Perhaps the most surprising part of the whole trip was the great time we had collaborating on Pam’s wonderful video project. Experience Wrightson for yourself in Pam’s ten-minute video, including the 28 bird species we encountered during our adventure.

Featured

Mt. Wrightson: Hiking Old Baldy Trail (part I of II)

I have been a physically active person my entire life. Neighborhood games til dusk in elementary school. Swim team and basketball in high school. Crew (rowing team) in college. Powerlifting in my 30’s. Mountaineering in my 40’s. And hiking with Ajax over the past 8 years. On April 23, 2023, I hiked to the top of Mt. Wrightson with a good friend, Pam, as part of her video series for female hikers over 50. When we started, I never expected we’d hike the entire Old Baldy Trail.

Old Baldy map and elevation profile: traveling to the top of Mt. Wrightson would require 4000′ gain, 11.4 miles round trip, attaining an altitude of 9,456′, the highest point in the Santa Rita Mountains.

A Visit to SE Arizona

A month before my husband and I traveled to SE Arizona for a week of birding, I sent Pam a message letting her know we’d be south of Tucson in a few weeks. The last time we’d seen each other was during the summer in 2021 when she and her kids joined us for dinner in Seattle.

We got to host Pam and her two kids for dinner on July 24, 2021.

“Is there anything you feel is a must-see while we’re there?” I asked.

“Me!” she replied emphatically. We agreed to hike part of the Old Baldy Trail on Mt. Wrightson,

Our goal was to shoot a video combining my birding and physical preparation knowledge, with her expertise in filming and her familiarity with the region. I wanted to start early enough to avoid the worst of the mid-day heat. If you’ve followed my blog over the past two years, you already know I absolutely adore snow. The more, the better.

Starting Up Mt. Wrightson on Old Baldy Trail

At the parking lot on Sunday, April 23, 2023, following our first full day of birding, we hit our first snag. Pam had borrowed a day pack from a friend, but when she tried it on, the lumbar stays poked her awkwardly in the back. Without a thought, I offered to carry two of her liters of water to make it more comfortable.

The Keyes family poses in the parking lot: Walt, Pam, and their son Zach.

I avoid applying sunscreen until it’s absolutely necessary, preferring to absorb as much natural vitamin D as I can. I also try to stay covered with long lightweight pants or tights and breathable long-sleeved shirts. Sunburn on the ears, neck, or stripes behind the knees (where I’ve missed spots) is NOT my idea of a fun way to kick off our birding vacation.

A little before 8 a.m. Walt and Zach headed up the Old Baldy Trail together, leaving the two of us to enjoy girl talk as though the 20 months between visits was more like 20 days.

Stops Along the Ascent

As we walked and talked, we took our time, stopping to check out birds and views. I shared my binoculars whenever any birds appeared. We used the Merlin Bird ID app to identify songbirds that got approached the trail. And I tried to provide a few tips for the beginning birder.

One of 27 bird species, the yellow-eyed junco, that we saw or heard on our Mt. Wrightson hike.

Sky Islands

Whenever I explore unfamiliar trails, I lose track of time. Especially if I’m deep in conversation with good company.

I found myself rewriting preconceived notions of SE Arizona (limited to the Grand Canyon and Sonoran Desert Museum) as mainly desert. Pam described the various mountain ranges in the region as “Sky Islands” with unique microhabitats and slight variants of all the flora and fauna.

Josephine Saddle

We shot a number of video recordings along the way, our collaborative project growing step by step. Before we knew it, we reached Josephine Saddle (1670′ gain / 2.4 miles) where we spotted a sign remembering three young teenage boys who perished in a snowstorm in the Santa Rita Mountains on November 15, 1958.

A little farther along the trail, we found Walt stretched out, snoozing in a patch of sun. His back was still bothering him from their backpacking trip to Horseshoe Mesa in the Grand Canyon the week before, so he was taking his time. He graciously agreed to shoot some video of us doing some hamstring stretches for Pam’s project before we continued.

Early Lunch on Mt. Wrightson

Not too much farther along, we chose a shaded spot with a view for lunch. I ate two oranges and some trail mix and soaked in the sights.

We could see a copper mine's reclamation pond from high up on Mt. Wrightson with Sky Island mountains behind. — We could see a copper mine’s reclamation pond from high up on Mt. Wrightson with Sky Island mountains behind.

I spotted a turquoise body of water that stood out from all the rest. “Copper mining tailings,” Pam explained. A reclamation pond. It may be wastewater, but boy, what an amazing view of it!

Snow at Bellows Spring

Once we resumed hiking, it wasn’t long before we reached what has become one of my favorite spots (why will become more apparent in Part II): Bellows Spring, at 8,153′.

SNOW!! In SE Arizona in April!! Bellows Spring at 8,153' had running water beneath a snow patch. A hike after my own heart. — SNOW!! In SE Arizona in April!! Bellows Spring at 8,153′ had running water beneath a snow patch. A hike after my own heart.

Man with a Tourniquet

Once we reached the baking-hot switchbacks leading up to the Old Baldy Saddle, a mile from the summit but the most elevation gain yet to climb, we encountered an elderly man with blood streaks all up and down his arm. Out of respect for his privacy, I did not shoot any photos although the image is burned in my mind.

The five people he was hiking with remained buoyant and positive, trying to keep his spirits up so he wouldn’t go into shock. One woman mentioned the time they’d started the tourniquet. A tourniquet! Holy moly, surely not — anything I’ve read about tourniquets indicates likely loss of limb afterward. Poor guy! We asked if there was anything we could do to help but aside from carrying out his broken, discarded pole we found on the way down, they insisted they would be okay.

I found a bandana and propped it up on a bush; it was gone by the time we came back. We also found where the gentleman must have slipped on some steeper jagged rock that was the source of his injury.

Successful Summit of Mt. Wrightson

By the time we reached the summit around 1:30, I had a slight headache. “It’s the altitude,” I told myself. I hadn’t been over 9,000 feet elevation since my eighth summit of Rainier in 2017. But headaches at that altitude are pretty common, especially after gaining 4,000 feet.

I’d consumed most of my 3 liters of electrolyte-dowsed water, thanks to the recommendation by my naturopath. Zach had been hanging out at the summit for some time; the breezes at the top and the thermals the ravens were cruising felt wonderful.

I crouch on the summit of Mt. Wrightson in SE AZ, 9500' high, with stunning views of sky islands in all directions. — I crouch on the summit of Mt. Wrightson in SE AZ, 9500′ high, with stunning views of sky islands in all directions.

But as you may know, whenever you reach the summit, you’re only halfway. “When the student is ready, the teacher appears” is spot on. Don’t miss next week’s blog post on Part II: The Descent.

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Birding 101: How to Get Started

On a recent week-long trip to Southeast Arizona, my husband and I joined forces with two friends who, several years ago, completed the Master Birder program offered by what was formerly known as Seattle Audubon. I added 46 new life birds to my Ebird.org list and, as a foursome, we encountered 175 unique bird species. If you have ever wanted to learn more about our avian friends but don’t know how to get started, consider this your Birding 101 tutorial.

An Acorn woodpecker has a snack. These birds are common in SE AZ but far less common in Western WA unless there are giant oaks nearby.

Birding 101: Where and When?

The best times to bird are during spring and fall migration, but you can appreciate birds year-round. In spring, not only can you see them, often in beautiful bright plumage (the better to attract mates!), but you will often hear them first, especially birds with melodic songs like thrushes, robins, and song sparrows. Birds are more active near dawn and dusk, building nests, foraging for food, and enjoying spring.

Birds need shelter, food, and water. They also need protection from predation, areas where they can build nests and rear their young. The best place to start studying birds is in your own backyard or local park or green space.

A tiny hummingbird pauses in flight to sip nectar from tubed plants. We saw 7-8 species and I'm still mastering the differences. — A tiny hummingbird pauses in flight to sip nectar from tubed plants. We saw 7-8 species and I’m still mastering the differences.

If you have any feeders, start by studying the birds that visit. Most people can identify common birds such as the American robin, mallard, and American crow. How many birds do you know already? You might be surprised.

If you prefer larger birds such as house finches, goldfinches, juncos, stellar’s jays, and towhees, try a seed or nut feeder. Just be aware that squirrels also love peanuts and are very crafty.

Do you like hummingbirds? Try putting out sugar water or colorful pink or red plants such as fuchsia. And if you like ducks and other waterfowl, you might want to learn which species winter in your area during the off-season.

A pair of mating bushtits in Ramsey Canyon, SE AZ.

Some great places for birding year-round in the north Seattle area include the Union Bay Natural Area (known as Montlake Fill) near the University of WA campus (see my recent blog post) and Magnuson Park.

Increasing Your Knowledge

Once you can identify a handful of common birds, it’s time to grow your list. A bird guide such as The Sibley Field Guide to Birds of Western North America is useful for identifying and studying new birds. Participating in neighborhood bird walks at local parks can also be a fun way to learn from more experienced birders. Plan to spend a few hours on a nice weekend morning craning your neck and ears.

A new-to-me life bird, the Arizona woodpecker.

Having a good pair of optics can make seeing hard-to-spot birds easier. While you don’t need super-expensive binoculars to gain an appreciation for the birds you’re watching, the higher the quality binoculars, the more enjoyable your experience. Be sure to get a few tips from the vendor on how best to adjust and care for your optics before you venture into the field.

If you want to travel light, Cornell University has several great resources you can take with you on your phone. Ebird.org allows you to keep track of all the birds you see. We’ve been keeping track since 2010. My life list, or the total tally of bird species I’ve had visual contact with, is now at 657 species.

Birding 101: There are many ways to expand your bird knowledge. Start today! A stunning Scott's oriole, another life bird. — Birding 101: There are many ways to expand your bird knowledge. Start today! A stunning Scott’s oriole, another life bird.

Another great resource, also through Cornell University, is Merlin Bird ID. This app allows you to visually and audibly identify birds you might not know. Not only can you make a recording of the songs you hear, you can replay them against other apps or have expert birders confirm what you heard, in case Merlin is unable to identify them.

Birding 101: Tips on Spotting Birds

You’ve got a place to watch birds, a pair of binoculars, and an app or guide. Now what? Here are a few final birding tips on how to spot the birds.

Spend time in an area. Birds often will stop singing as soon as an intruder arrives. By standing still and letting them know you are not a threat, they’ll often resume their behavior.
Keep your movements slow and deliberate. Rushing any wildlife will cause them to dart or fly away.
Keep your gaze soft. Rather than hunting for birds with the binoculars, look for movement with your naked eye then bring the binoculars up to get a better look.

A bird truck at the Southwestern Research Station in the Chiricahua Mountains, SE AZ.

Use reference points to get others in your party to see your bird. “That tree, right over there!” is not at all helpful. “The cottonwood, go up to the V, then look twenty feet up the largest trunk, it’s creeping up on the right-hand side below the obvious vegetation clump” is way more useful.
Be patient with yourself. Do not try to master all the birds or you will get overwhelmed. Aim for adding 5-10 birds an outing, and even that is pretty aggressive.
Don’t forget to look for foliage and mammals, too. Above all else, getting outside is all about having fun!

Don't forget all the other things you can spot outside, from flora and fauna to landscapes and portraits. — Don’t forget all the other things you can spot outside, from flora and fauna to landscapes and portraits.

Much More to Come!

I have very exciting news. I have partnered with a videographer friend, Pam Campbell Keyes, who is doing a series on hiking in SE Arizona targeting women over 50 on her YouTube channel. We will be bringing you a special film treat about our adventure to Mt. Wrightson in a few weeks. Don’t miss it!

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Go for Good: How to Rewrite Stories

If you follow any sports, you’re probably familiar with the phrase, “Go for the gold.” Aim high, shoot for the stars, and push hard. To remind myself of my goal to cultivate a growth mindset, I modified it to my new mantra, go for good. Simple. Catchy. Easy to remember. Motivating. I even wrote it on an elastic band and placed it on my wrist as a visible reminder of my intention.

A visible reminder of my intention: Go for Good band. Every time it snags on things it reminds me of my commitment. The more I discuss it with people, the more I look for challenges as positive learning opportunities. Gimmick? Perhaps. Effective? Definitely.

To me, go for good means seeking what’s good about any struggle, obstacle, mistake, failure, disappointment, or problem. Finding the silver lining. Turning what I may have previously viewed negatively into a positive. In other words, rewriting my negative stories is becoming a path toward building the mental muscle of optimism.

Flight Delay

Last week’s return flight from Asheville to Seattle is my first example of a negative story. Thunderstorms grounded all planes into and out of Chicago’s O’Hare International for several hours mid-day. Instead of arriving in Seattle at 6:30 p.m. I got home past midnight. With only four hours of sleep before a day of clients. It would take several days to recover from lost sleep and jetlag. But we have no control over Mother Nature.

Ajax poses in front of cherry trees on the UW campus.

Go For Good 1

I rewrote my story to include the following good lessons. I:

am fully capable of solo travel even when things go haywire
have a greater appreciation for our local airport in Seattle, which feels far more manageable than O’Hare
had ample time to fully recharge my phone battery, which had declined to 10% (neither flight had charge capabilities in my row)
remember how important it is to set and stick to personal boundaries (courtesy of my brother)
enjoyed recounting my adventure with my husband who picked me up at the airport (with Ajax). I can use my light rail pass for a future trip
came up with ideas for future unplanned or long layovers: explore the airport

A shot of artwork at Chicago's O'Hare Airport en route from gate D4 to C31. It's an intimidating airport but next time I get stuck there I plan to explore it more fully. — A shot of artwork at Chicago’s O’Hare Airport en route from gate D4 to C31. It’s an intimidating airport but next time I get stuck there I plan to explore it more fully.

In short, if I stop, reflect on the entire experience, and look for the good things, it’s likely that I can find them. I can also learn from previous mistakes and plan how to handle them the next time they happen.

Today, I describe my return trip to Seattle in terms of “an adventure” rather than “a disaster.” As a learning experience rather than an epic failure. What’s more, instead of dreading my next flight, I’m eager to see what challenges come up. Because they will.

Cherry Blossom Ramble

Another example of a story I’ve rewritten happened on a recent ramble with Ajax. The cherry blossoms on the University of Washington campus reached peak bloom on April 5, 2023. On Tuesday, I had a few spare hours, so we drove to the Horticulture Center for our thirtieth unique Active Ajax Adventure.

Cherry blossoms in full bloom on the UW campus in Seattle. Go for good: on a rainy, windy, mid-week day, "the good" included fewer people lingering for photos, pink "snow" to add a playful quality to our ramble, and a moody sky for atmospheric photos. — Cherry blossoms in full bloom on the UW campus in Seattle. Go for good: on a rainy, windy, mid-week day, “the good” included fewer people lingering for photos, pink “snow” to add a playful quality to our ramble, and a moody sky for atmospheric photos.

We headed up the steep hill to the north campus to see the cherry blossoms on the quad before wandering around the Union Bay Natural Area viewing twenty species of birds. We had high winds, high lake levels, chilly temperatures, and overcast skies. What’s more, my plan to connect with my daughter in the morning failed. Without her, who would take my picture? And what about getting a photo of the two of us with the trees?

Go For Good 2

It turns out that she had a science lab at noon. She kept her phone off until later in the afternoon. But if I rewrite the story with a focus on the good, I come up with the following positives:

Rainy conditions mean fewer gawkers in my photographs and fewer distractions for Ajax
Overcast skies create dramatic backdrops for photos
Ajax and I had a lovely 90-minute ramble together, the first since my trip to North Carolina
I reflected on my own time on campus during grad school, as well as last year’s visit to campus for Prospective Students Day with our daughter
We enjoyed pink snow as the wind blew petals from the trees. Where else do you get to see that?
I got to be spontaneous, something I want to do more of
And though I’m not a fan of selfies, it’s always available as a last resort

What’s more, by trying something new, I continue to model for my daughter how to take risks, get outside our comfort zones, and keep trying if we happen to fail the first dozen times.

A beaming pair of friends at "Prospective Students Day" on March 26, 2022, along with thousands of weekend spectators. — A beaming pair of friends at “Prospective Students Day” on March 26, 2022, along with thousands of weekend spectators.

Challenging Interactions

My last example of a rewritten story includes interactions with challenging people. That might include folks who have differing opinions from mine, who are in a different stage of life, or who make me feel inadequate. You know the type: anyone you might tend to avoid.

Go For Good 3

Instead of avoiding challenging people, I can remind myself that:

Everyone is doing the best they can with the tools they have available
Each person has a complex backstory that shapes them, a story I can’t imagine; I can only ask about it
My job is to get curious about each person I meet and look for a way to connect or similarities in our stories
If I look at challenging people as mysteries to solve or puzzle pieces to fit together, I can replace fear with curiosity, which unlocks my problem-solving ability and makes the conversation far more enjoyable
I can seek one GOOD thing about each interaction. It’s there!

Go for Good Takeaways

In order to rewrite your stories, here are some takeaway tips. The next time you feel like you have a problem you can’t solve or something has gone wrong, ask yourself three questions:

What would an optimist focus on in this situation? In other words, what GOOD do you see?
What have you LEARNED from this experience that you can apply to future experiences? Everything is a teacher if we are open to learning
How could you turn the current problem into an OPPORTUNITY to explore something you haven’t before?

If technology frustrates you, try thinking of the advantages it might bring once you master it. When you have to wait in a long line, consider striking up a conversation with the person behind you. And the next time something doesn’t go quite as you expect, look for the benefits of the way it did.

Please feel free to share any comments below. I love hearing from readers.

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How to Grow a Growth Mindset

Two weeks ago, I discussed the importance of developing a life-purpose map to help you get where you want to go. Last week, I introduced the idea of gaining a fresh perspective on your goals and stretching outside of the familiar to challenge yourself in new ways. The third and final post in this mini-series outlines my journey through setting SMART goals. Join me as I launch my journey toward growing a growth mindset.

Assess Your Mindset

Stanford University professor Carol Dweck has studied mindset for over 30 years. If you want to know whether you have a fixed or a growth mindset, take her short quiz.

I know I’m onto something when I read part of my results: “You may be coasting when you could be excelling. You probably have more potential than you are using.”

Add to that my husband’s recent question, “Do you want to look back at this time with regrets, or amazement at all you’ve accomplished?” Easy. I hate regret.

Quilled ornaments at Thyme in the Garden.

Steps Toward a Growth Mindset

Once I recognized that I want to develop stronger tendencies toward a growth mindset, I tried imagining what would be different when I had one. In other words, starting with the end goal in mind. But what exactly does someone with a growth mindset do?

Growth Mindset Attributes

Below is a comprehensive list of mindset attributes compiled from a wide variety of resources including Precision Nutrition, Future Learn, Carol Dweck’s research, and Steve Hogarty at WeWork.

Practice “beginner’s mind”
Seek new perspectives
Seek out challenges
Be self-compassionate
Think on a continuum
Focus on effort over results
Embrace and analyze “failure” or mistakes
Take small steps daily
Get out of your comfort zone
Roll with the punches
Set realistic and reasonable expectations
Identify and record bright spots

Wood ducks remind me of my desire to grow a growth mindset. I think of problems as water droplets that I can shake off my feathers and continue to go with the flow.

Create a Shortlist

I can hear you griping. It’s just like reading a better eating habits list that starts with “chew each bite forty times,” “avoid multi-tasking,” and “set your fork down between each bite.” If you’re like me, you took one look at the long list and felt like quitting before you even started.

That’s the fixed mindset at work.

Read the list again. What three actions jump out at you? What are a few items you feel could be helpful but not impossible, that might result in forward progress? That’s where to start. Here’s my shortlist.

Thyme in the Garden, a lovely boutique garden shop outside of Asheville, NC

Channel Your Inner Wood Duck

My mantra for “roll with the punches” has been to “channel my inner wood duck.” I love the beautiful, multi-colored birds pictured above. I imagine water droplets — problems — landing on my feathers and simply shaking them off and continuing on my way down the stream. No harm, no foul.

What’s a Reasonable Expectation?

When I reached “set realistic and reasonable expectations,” I hesitated. What change might I see by summer, if I put serious effort into it? Can someone with decades of fixed mindset develop a growth mindset in all areas of life? Is it a lifetime pursuit? If I wanted to see measurable progress, how might I go about making a deliberate change?

Beautiful blooming bushes remind me of the one constant in life: Change.

Growth Mindset Action 1: Identify Bright Spots

I finally settled on the last one on the list, “Identify bright spots,” as my first action. I already have a habit of recording three wins each evening (an activity suggested in Dan Sullivan’s The Gap and The Gain). So it should be straightforward to change that to “record bright spots related to a growth mindset.”

In this way, I am training myself to call obstacles challenges and opportunities, not roadblocks. Language matters.

Blooming tulips during a walk in Asheville, NC.

Whichever task you choose, focus on one action for two weeks. Write down your start and end date on a calendar or app. Then at the end of two weeks, assess whether you notice a difference.

Set up a support system. Give yourself a sticker when you complete your daily task. Set up reminders to keep it front and center. Tell someone about your intention. When you reach the end of the time period, decide whether you want to keep the habit (if it helped) or change focus to a new one. Every two weeks, evaluate your progress.

Ready to grow? Get set, GO!

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Gaining Fresh Perspective at Salmon Creek Ravine

In this second of three posts exploring our life’s purpose, I discuss the importance of viewing our goals from a fresh perspective. Are you ready, able, and willing to critically examine your current mindset and feelings about change in order to achieve better results? If so, join us on a pictorial ramble through Salmon Creek Ravine in Burien.

On our third drive-by, I spotted this sign beside the road and figured we'd park and explore on foot. Fortunately, it marked a rutted dirt path that took us down into the ravine. — On our third drive-by, I spotted this sign beside the road and figured we’d park and explore on foot. Fortunately, it marked a rutted dirt path that took us down into the ravine.

Ramble 27

Last Wednesday, Ajax and I drove to Burien on an errand and took a detour to explore Salmon Creek Ravine. On the third try, we happened upon a wooden sign near Seahurst Park, a park we visited earlier this year. Right beside it is a trail leading down to sloping hillsides of ferns and birdsong. This path looked promising.

For the next hour or so, we explored the trail twisting through old-growth cedars, madrone, Douglas firs, large maples, and alders. Mid-morning in March on a weekday is a fabulous time to visit if you want the place to yourself. We only saw one other person. And one abandoned backpack.

As we walked, I reflected on a goal I recently developed during a Precision Nutrition course: to change my fixed mindset into a growth mindset. But how, exactly, was I going to do that? What if I tried an approach similar to the one I use with my clients?

A girl's backpack abandoned on the trail was the only item that didn't belong, other than a bag for trash at one of the junctures. — A girl’s backpack abandoned on the trail was the only item that didn’t belong, other than a bag for trash at one of the junctures.

Start with the End Goal in Mind

To embark on any physical journey, such as climbing Mt. Rainier or hiking Rim-to-rim-to-rim in the Grand Canyon, you start with the end goal and work backward to the present day. I am well acquainted with programming for physical objectives. After all, I’ve been doing it for twenty-five years.

Alpine Tasks

In the mountains, we face any number of challenges such as navigating slopes while carrying a heavy pack. Dealing with the weather. Paddling for hours with extended legs. Preparing meals. Building shelters, igloos, or wind walls. Sleeping on uneven, hard ground. Looking upward while a partner climbs. The list is long. And each item provides a different stress on the mind and body.

Now view each activity through the lens of training needs. What are the aerobic and anaerobic requirements of the trips you’d like to go on? What skills do you need to improve? How much upper, core, and lower body strength is needed? Do you have sufficient flexibility to complete the tasks? Do you need to invest time and money in more training? What areas might you develop to improve your experience? By starting with the end in mind, you get an idea of what you need to accomplish your goal.

Enjoying a fresh perspective on a beautiful spring day. Ajax explores wonderful scents on the Salmon Creek Ravine trail.

Use a Fresh Perspective to Determine What’s Lagging

The simplest way to find the gaps in the example above is to do a trial outing. If you’re preparing for a backpack or trek, hike on a trail similar to the one you’ll be traveling on. To get ready for a kayaking trip, pull out your kayak and test how you do. For a multi-day adventure, see how you feel two days in a row doing your activity without a rest day, what we call a back-to-back.

Afterward, assess how you feel, what was easy, and where you had difficulty. Then, instead of simply doing more of whatever feels easy, create a plan designed to minimize your weaknesses.

This selfie was taken in front of a hollowed-out tree, one of my favorite finds on this new-to-me trail.

Shore Up Perceived Weaknesses

If your legs give out going uphill, add lower-body strength training exercises such as step-ups, squats, wall sits, dips, or lunges. If your arms fail, add upper-body strength training exercises including pull-ups or dead hangs, pushups, and arms work.

Do you go forever on flat ground without a backpack, but struggle whenever you carry a pack? If so, spend additional time on the trail with a loaded pack. If you find talus, scree, or boulder slopes challenges, seek them out and practice on them. And if you dread getting out of a tent all stiff and tight, add flexibility and mobility exercises to your training. Did certain muscle groups ache? Add a few targeted stretches for the lower back, hips, and shoulders.

Ajax gets a refreshing drink from the gravel creek bed at Salmon Creek Ravine.

Finally, assess your gear. How did your feet do? Do you need new hiking boots or more time to get your feet accustomed to the trail? Did your pack cause you problems? Determine whether you’re loading it evenly. You may also want to consider investing in a fitted pack for your frame.

A Fresh Perspective for Life Objectives?

So, could that same basic model help with the less tangible goal of developing a growth mindset? How, exactly, do you go about “building resilience,” “becoming more positive,” and “asking better questions”? Are there other steps I’m forgetting or overlooking? What would it look like to “be more positive?” How do you know when you reach a goal of “asking better questions”? What would a day look like if you have a growth mindset rather than a fixed mindset?

These are questions I’m setting out to answer. Next week, I will share my journey through setting Specific, Measurable, Action-oriented, Realistic, and Time-stamped goals around developing a growth mindset. It is a three-month focus (hey, there’s the “time-stamped” part), now that my Active Ajax Adventures project is going so well and our revised website has been launched.

Do you have a goal that has been weighing on your mind for a long time? Are you uncertain how to get started? Join me for next week’s post when I share some tools for moving onward, upward, and forward.

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How to Develop a Life Purpose Map

On Saint Patrick’s Day, I wanted to do something special to mark the halfway point in my series of Active Ajax Adventures. For our 26th outing, what started as a local urban walk turned into a multi-hour exploration that incorporated Grace Cole Nature Park. Ever since, I’ve been contemplating change, mindsets, and direction. In the first of three related posts, I share ideas for how to develop a life purpose map.

The Grace Cole Nature Park is only accessible from the north. If I'd looked more closely at the street map I would have realized that what I thought would take a couple of hours would need longer. — The Grace Cole Nature Park is only accessible from the north. If I’d studied the street map more carefully, I would have realized our ramble would take longer.

Without a Map…

My intention was to visit a few Little Free Libraries on the way to the southeast area of the green space. I knew to head due north, then assumed we’d find the first right to head into the park. But all of the roads kept leading left. We ended up .7 miles north of our destination, clear up in Lake Forest Park.

It was such a lovely spring day, and both of us were enjoying ourselves. When we finally arrived at the nature park, we’d already walked for ninety minutes. “At least,” I thought, “it will be quicker getting home.” Not quite. We had to head north again until we found a right turn that would finally lead us back south.

One of my mistakes was assuming Grace Cole Nature Park was in Shoreline. If I'd known it was considered part of Lake Forest Park, or if I'd looked more closely at the access roads, we probably would have driven. — One of my mistakes was assuming Grace Cole Nature Park was in Shoreline. If I’d known it was considered part of Lake Forest Park, or if I’d looked more closely at the access roads, we probably would have driven.

Analogy for Life Purpose Map

As we rambled, I got to thinking about the importance of maps, both for travel and life. Without directions to your exact destination, it takes far longer to get there. If we don’t know what we want, we can’t aim for it. And without having a firm idea of our life’s destination, we’re likely to squander precious time or try things that go nowhere.

But in some ways, that makes the journey more interesting, and more fun. On our ramble, we got to see things we wouldn’t have if we’d driven. I shot ninety photos that morning. Most of them were discoveries outside of the park. You could say we “flew by the seat of our pants.”

Ajax approaches the duck ponds along the short boardwalk through the wetlands.

Plotter, Pantser, or Plantser?

Likewise, writers are considered to be either plotters or pantsers. Plotters figure out the start and end points, with a few key points along the way. Pantsers tend to wing it, or “fly by the seat of their pants.” They come across surprises along the way that inform, enrich, and alter their story.

Hybrids, known as plantsers, do a little of both. I like to know my end destination, but how I get there varies widely. Pilots are off course 95% of the time yet somehow they still reach the target airport.

At work, I am a plotter. I’ve learned how to help clients set reasonable goals and pursue them. In rambles with Ajax, I’m becoming a plantser. And in life and writing, I have been more of a pantser. Which are you? Does it vary, depending on the situation you find yourself in?

Oops. "You have now left the park and are entering the backyard of a private residence." A kind way to say "Turn around, fool." Does your life purpose map exist? Does it have detours and false starts? — Oops. “You have now left the park and are entering the backyard of a private residence.” A kind way to say “Turn around, fool.” Does your life purpose map exist? Does it have detours and false starts?

Life Choices as Teens

It feels like I have been a pantser most of my life, jumping at the next thing that sounds feasible. I went to college on the East Coast because that’s what a lot of my classmates’ older siblings were doing. I stayed there because I found a job at the Smithsonian Institute that sounded fun. And I moved to Seattle for graduate school because I’d only heard positive things about it.

If someone had told my high school self that I’d live my adult life in Seattle as an author and personal trainer running my own company, I never would have believed it. Most of what I do now never crossed my radar as a teenager. And most of what I write about now, I could not have known about even two years ago. We expect too much from our teens.

A life purpose map doesn't include everything. If I'd followed a map to Grace Cole Nature Park I would have missed some wonderful surprises along the way. — A life purpose map doesn’t include everything. If I’d followed a map to Grace Cole Nature Park I would have missed some wonderful surprises along the way.

Life Purpose Map Questions

Regardless of whether you like to plot or wing it, how do you start making a life purpose map? Below are some questions to reflect on or discuss with a partner, spouse, coach, or someone close to you.

Have a conversation with your significant other or close family member about potential “couples goals.” What would you like to accomplish by the end of the year? In the next two years? Five years?
Think about what you have enjoyed the most in the past five years. How might you include more of that in the coming months?
Imagine yourself at the age of 85. What have you accomplished? Where have you traveled? Whose lives have you enriched? What obstacles have you overcome? What does your daily life look like?
Have a conversation with that wise older you either in chair form or writing in different colored pens as I suggested in last week’s blog. What advice would your future self provide? What would you most like to ask future you?
Finally, try writing your obituary to get in touch with what matters most. Who would you want to be present at your celebration of life? What do you want to be remembered for? What do you want to have accomplished in your lifetime? Some people call these items a “bucket list.”

A commemorative bench in Grace Cole Nature Park. The plaque is for a loved one who was a "pacifist, musician, and nature-lover." What three words best describe you? Are they words you'd want on your own bench? — A commemorative bench in Grace Cole Nature Park. The plaque is for a loved one who was a “pacifist, musician, and nature-lover.” What three words best describe you? Are they words you’d want on your own bench?

Takeaways

Creating a life purpose map requires time, focus, mental energy, and patience. Think about the questions posted above during your next walk or hike. Send your deepest desires and wishes to the multiverse and be open to what happens next. Reflect on what you WANT, instead of what you DON’T want. The more definite you are about what you want, the more likely you are to hit the target.

On ramble 26, I knew I wanted to visit Grace Cole Nature Park. But I had no time restrictions or specific mileposts along the way. Any route would do. Is that how you want to meander through your life? My path to blogger and business owner was quite circuitous. Yet I would change very little about it.

Would a more specific map have helped? I don’t know. But I do know I want to get more specific for the next phase of my adult life. What about you?

Ajax posed beside a huge tree stump in Grace Cole Nature Park. His look says it all: "Mamarazzi, aren't you tired of taking my picture?" — Ajax posed beside a huge tree stump in Grace Cole Nature Park. His look says it all: “Mamarazzi, aren’t you tired of taking my picture?”

In an upcoming blog, we’ll look at how to get very specific with what you want in order to figure out what practices to put into your daily life.

Featured

How to Resolve Conflicting Messages

Earlier this week, I found myself thinking, “This is really frustrating. I wish somebody would tell me what to do.” Minutes later, in a completely different situation, I said to myself, “I don’t want anyone else telling me what to do.” Huh? How can we resolve conflicting messages such as these?

On a beautiful morning at Magnuson Park, I struggled with the conflicting messages warring in my mind.

Ambivalence Is Normal

Wanting one thing in a certain area of your life but something else that apparently conflicts with it in a different area — like my pseudo-desire for guidance — is totally normal. Just like you can have a fixed mindset in certain areas of your life but a growth mindset in others.

Ambivalence comes from craving something different, but also wanting things to continue as they are. Sound familiar?

Think of a situation in your life where you have tried repeatedly to change but you just haven’t had the success you’d like. Maybe you lose a few pounds one week but gain it all back the next. Or you make fantastic progress one week and fall into a slump the next. You know you should be moving forward — after all, who doesn’t want to be healthy, happy, and successful — but you just can’t get consistent.

Decorated building near Magnuson Park's Promontory Point. — Decorated maintenance shed near Magnuson Park’s Promontory Point.

Can you be okay living with ambivalence, at least for a short while until you’re ready to change?

Key Words for Change

Sometimes clients think they “should” want x or y, but then they don’t take any actions toward them. Maybe they sabotage themselves or fall into “when X, then Y” thinking. I’ve written about that pesky word “should” before. How if you’re using it often, write it big on a piece of paper and then scribble over it. Remove it from your working vocabulary.

The simplest answer is: it’s not what they really want. Yet.

Whenever you have a big enough reason — a big enough why — you will find the motivation and courage to change. The desire to change must come from within. And even when we succeed at changing, we’re still not completely immune to backsliding. We need to develop self-compassion and recognize that even during struggle we are human and worthy of love and respect. Whether we are stuck or moving forward.

This is a perfect example of going nowhere, fast. These stairs at Promontory Point were so overgrown with branches that we had to turn around to look for another path. Just like in life, sometimes we must try something, get lost, reach a dead end, and try again. A coach can help you speed up the process.

Coaches at Precision Nutrition use the key phrase, “ready, willing, and able.” If a person is not ready, willing, or able to do certain things, not even the best coach with the perfect program and advice will be able to get them to change.

So what are we supposed to DO in order to change? Suffer in silence?

Tools for Understanding Conflicting Messages

As Precision Nutrition coaches, we’re taught the importance of facing discomfort in order to grow. Here are two tools you can use to try to better understand where those conflicting messages are coming from and what they are trying to tell you. Because while our habits start out supporting us, once we outgrow them it is time to change.

Magnuson has something for everyone: sports fields, off-leash dog park, and wild birds habitat. It also has plenty of areas to explore. — Magnuson has something for everyone: sports fields, an off-leash dog park, and wild bird habitat. It also has plenty of areas to explore.

Two Voices In Conversation

This exercise resembles role play with yourself. You can think of the mature, wise, and compassionate voice who has all the answers as your “adult self.” The stuck, confused, frustrated, and perhaps scared voice is your “child self.”

Feel free to give a name to each self, or even think of them in terms of mentor/mentee, teacher/student, wise/novice, or coach/client. Whatever relationship resonates most with you. I have named my 6-year-old gremlin “Gooky”, a smash-up of “great” and “cookie” that I created when I was battling to give up sugar. She is my voice of resistance. And she is doggedly determined to keep things exactly the way they are.

Four years ago I was still baking something every few days. Once I realized how much better I felt without gluten, sugar, and dairy, the change made itself. I was furious about giving up each thing. Now I don't even notice. — Four years ago I was still baking something every few days. Once I realized how much better I felt without gluten, sugar, and dairy, the change made itself. I was furious about giving up each thing. Now I don’t even notice.

You can write (or type) what each voice says. Or if you prefer talking through problems, set two chairs facing one another. Allow the stuck self to have three minutes to say whatever it likes. Pause for a minute and jot down whatever comes up.

Then switch font or ink color (or chair) and give the wise self a minute to summarize what the confused self has revealed. Think of the wise self as you in fifty years, if you like, looking back at now. For two more minutes, the wise self gets to offer affirmations, love, understanding, and possible solutions. It then asks a question of the stuck self.

After each voice has had a chance to talk, continue the dialogue until each side has been heard. What did each voice say? What insights did you gain from listening to each voice?

Examine Previous Changes

The second tool is to examine your past and make a list of any large changes you’ve made. Examples might include graduating from college or graduate school, getting a promotion, entering a long-term relationship, starting a family or business, or traveling. Everyone alive is capable of profound change.

The important thing to recognize is that change is scary, but you have within you all the tools you need to do it. What skills come to the surface? Maybe you were really resilient. Perhaps you loved the planning aspect of it. Or it could be that you had a partner help you get through. Write them down as a list of your unique change tools.

The only constant in life is change. We are all capable of change. But it takes examining our own process and what works best to move forward.

Motivational Interviewing: Beat Conflicting Messages

Finally, once you have a better understanding of what’s causing your ambivalence and a list of your change tools, reread what you’ve written. If you find yourself using a lot of words like “just” or “but”, you’re facing resistance. Again, normal.

Precision Nutrition has a wonderful piece about Motivational Interviewing that goes into far more detail about ambivalence and resistance. The key point is to recognize that resistance is just as much a part of making a change as ambivalence. You are normal!

If you identify a lot of anger and defensiveness in your dialogue, embrace it. Question it. Be curious about it. And by writing it down you can examine it more closely when you’re not as emotionally charged.

Homemade rice flour tortillas. Delicious and gluten-free. Quite the change from what used to make me congested, inflamed, and ill before. I'll take it! — Homemade rice flour tortillas. Delicious and gluten-free. Quite the change from what used to make me congested, inflamed, and ill before. I’ll take it!

Convert Terrified into Ready, Willing, and Able

I mentioned struggling to launch our Total Health track until my husband and I created a list of tiny steps to take to inch forward. Some only took me five minutes. But the more tiny steps I took, the more forward momentum I gained, and the more confident I became.

You, too, can turn terrifying into “ready, willing, and able”. Please share in the comments whatever you’re struggling with. Our readers have plenty of unique experiences. And as part of a change community, we’d love to help.

Featured

How to Face Discomfort to Grow

The only thing I wanted to experience last Friday was the anonymity and peaceful comfort of the rainy urban woods. Ajax and I took our 24th ramble of the year through Ravenna and Cowen Parks. Following a recent dream in which I got hopelessly mired in mud, I’ve come to recognize the necessity of struggle. That doesn’t make it any easier to face discomfort to grow.

Mud, mud, mud everywhere. Not only did Ajax and I have a muddy ramble, but since then I dreamed of getting stuck in the mud. While I don't fully understand dreams, I do know my subconscious is hard at work at night trying to help the rest of me. — Mud, mud, mud everywhere. Not only did Ajax and I have a muddy ramble, but since then I dreamed of getting stuck in the mud. While I don’t fully understand dreams, I do know my subconscious is hard at work at night trying to help the rest of me.

Loss

The past three years have been physically and emotionally challenging. Uncomfortable. Painful. As a trainer familiar with physical challenges, I’ve thrown everything into recovering from a broken right wrist. Now that it’s healed, I have to confront the emotional rollercoaster of midlife career changes, a pseudo-empty nest, and changing family dynamics, all while the world continues to feel angst around COVID.

Ajax enjoys a colorful mural at Cowen Park while helping me to grow past discomfort.

But life is all about struggle and change, right?

That doesn’t mean we have to enjoy it. Or can we?

Pre-pandemic

Prior to March 2020, I was heavily involved in our community. I used to help at Mary’s Place, shelve books at the local elementary school library, lead outings for the Seattle Mountaineers, and volunteer weekly at Woodland Park Zoo, in addition to working 20-30 hours a week at my company. We also traveled internationally every other year.

The pandemic changed everything. I’m sure it has for you, as well. What have you given up? What would you take back, if you could only summon the courage to retrieve it?

Dense clusters of pine cones. Have you hugged a tree recently?

Present-Day

Right now, nearly all of my coaching remains virtual. I’ve retained two volunteer positions, one on Write On the Sound‘s steering committee, and the other writing a quarterly column for the Mountaineer Magazine. If we travel, we’ve been driving, until our debut flight to Texas last November.

It is no wonder that I’m feeling anxious about two upcoming airline trips. One, solo, will be to visit family in early April. The other will include birding in Arizona with my husband and a few friends, several weeks later.

I can count solo trips I’ve taken in the last three decades on one hand. And we’ve never flown to bird with friends. Both represent new challenges that will push me way outside of my comfort zone.

I found myself looking for the solace of trees, even on a gloomy wet afternoon in March. Was this the dark night of the soul? Did I need to get totally mired in mud in order to move forward?

Patience Around Fear

I know I’m doing challenging emotional, spiritual, and psychological work, but part of me feels like it’ll never be fast enough. Susan Jeffers, in her book, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, writes, “Patience means knowing it will happen . . . and giving it time to happen.” Is there something in your life that you know you have to change but wonder if it ever will?

Part of me feels like I’ve already spent plenty of time. But just like grief, which has no limit or expiration, facing fear has no limit or expiration, either. As a good friend recently reminded me, “Be the buffalo.” It would seem that the faster you tackle it, the sooner the discomfort will be over.

But man, sometimes it is JUST. SO. HARD. Sound familiar?

According to Jeffers, “The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is … to go out and do it.”

The author and Labraheeler Ajax enjoying a rainy ramble in Cowen and Ravenna Parks.

So this spring, I bravely face the future, knowing that I have tremendous support, a capable mind and resilient body, clients and readers who cheer me on, and a message to share.

Don’t just dream it, LIVE IT.

If we rest on our laurels, choosing only what’s comfortable every day, we’re simply existing. And I don’t know about you, but I want to reach the finish line for the second half of my life without any regrets. I don’t want to just coast.

Embrace and Face Discomfort

Things we accomplish easily don’t feel as meaningful or as important as those that we agonize over. In the world of writing, deep in every story comes “the dark night of the soul.” It’s the point at which the hero feels like all is lost. Hope is gone. There’s no point in going forward.

Have you ever felt your time is out? Like the sun is setting on your dreams and you may as well give up? You are not alone.

No way can I become a wellness coach. It’s way too scary. May as well just keep doing what I’ve been doing.

But close on its heels, the other famous storyline whispers in my ear: The heroine can never return.

Pre-COVID life is gone. For good.

All we can do is charge forward into the future.

Something has shifted. I joke with my critique partners that I’m still waiting for my story arc before I write my memoirs. Could this be my arc?

Cliches race through my mind: One step at a time. Rome wasn’t built in a day. If you’re not failing, you’re not trying hard enough. Nobody is perfect. And suddenly, hope returned.

The beauty of trees, their strength, and their stamina keep me grounded and centered. Oh, to be as strong and confident as a tree.

I like to think of myself as courageous, having survived natural childbirth unmedicated and three reductions on my wrist that hurt far worse than the break itself. Launching our new Total Health Coaching track has me terrified. Who do I think I am? But, here we go.

Challenge Yourself To Face Discomfort

Think about the changes you’ve faced in the past three years. Have you resumed most pre-pandemic activities? Have you fallen into a small world of comfort? When was the last time you voluntarily accepted challenges?

How might you challenge yourself to get outside of your comfort zone? Maybe you have a fear of public speaking. Can you find a Toastmasters group or start with a small Zoom workshop? If you are afraid to ask questions, perhaps you can set a goal to ask one question every day. When you find yourself putting up obstacles, or using the phrase, “Yes, but…” can you replace it with the more empowering, “Yes, and…”?

What wonderful thing would you have in your life... if only you could get face discomfort? DO IT! — What wonderful thing would you have in your life… if only you could get face discomfort? DO IT!

I challenge you to pick a challenge for this spring. It can be small or big, your choice. My Active Ajax Adventures was a project I knew I’d enjoy, but I wouldn’t call it a challenge. Flying to Arizona and North Carolina are challenges, but I know I can do them.

Launching a new branch of my business? Terrifying. Let’s see how many mistakes I make and what I can learn from it. Who knows, it may be the best thing I ever do.

Featured

What Matters Most: How to Remind Yourself

Following a wonderful ramble with a friend on Friday, I got some upsetting news over the weekend. But with snow in the forecast, I tried not to let it derail me for more than a few days. In this post, I share a few strategies for remembering what matters most so we keep making forward progress, inch by inch, even during the most challenging times.

The Olympic mountains as seen from Edmonds on a clear Friday morning in February right before the snow hit the Pacific Northwest.

Shape Your Environment

Whenever we want to change a habit, the easiest way to do so is to alter our environment to support our goals. For example, if your goal is to reduce systemic inflammation and the habit you want to build is staying hydrated, you might set an action item to drink two liters of water every day. Try filling several water bottles and leaving them everywhere so they’re easy to grab.

Place one at your desk. Keep one in your car. Put several in the refrigerator to chill. Store one in your backpack when you go for a hike or head to the gym for a workout. If you want to make your hydration habit more fun, consider purchasing a “motivational water bottle.” Such gimmicks work because they tap into your playful inner child who WANTS to see the bottle change when it’s empty, even though plain water may not be your favorite.

Ajax enjoys our early rambles as much as I do, even when it's cold. — Ajax enjoys our early rambles as much as I do, even when it’s cold.

Another way to shape your environment is to place sticky notes with “DRINK UP” all around the house to remind you of your goal. Whenever your eyes land on one, find the nearest water bottle and take a sip. You can also set alerts on your phone or watch so that whenever they buzz, you chug. Any other favorite drinking games? Include them!

Create a Rough Schedule

When overwhelm threatened to shut me down, I made a list of things I wanted to finish. I’m aware that my lists are always impossibly long, and I’m working on that. This time, I starred the items I NEEDED to complete. Tasks with set deadlines like client work. Items I’d promised I would do. Things that were important to me in terms of my values and priorities.

Once I narrowed the list down to the nine highest-priority items, I assigned the approximate time I would need to complete each one. Note that times assume I’m paying complete attention, not multitasking.

The brilliant colors reminded me of October, not February.

Assign Time Allotments for What Matters Most

You may have your own unique strategy for making lists. My husband likes to put open boxes or bubbles next to items that he fills when he’s done. My list looked something like this:

Client revision in 15 minutes Due Tuesday
Client summaries for 15 minutes Due Tuesday
Practice 3 songs on the piano for 10 minutes
Complete one online lesson in 20 minutes
Write one assignment for 15 minutes
Work on the landing page for our new website for 30 minutes
Choose 8 pictures for Blog 81 for 20 minutes Due Tuesday
Walk Ajax for 30 minutes
Write, edit, and submit 8 pages to the critique group ??? Due Friday

We created Paradise (pair of dice) in our front lawn. This was a deliberate, planned sculpture that we failed to make in December during the deep freeze, so we tried again. — We created Paradise (a pair of dice) on our front lawn. This was a deliberate, planned sculpture that we failed to make in December during the deep freeze, so we tried again.

Include Wiggle Room

Barring interruptions (like sneaking in a few games on my phone) and adding half an hour for dinner, I realized I could complete most of my tasks. I did the items that were due that day first and gave myself permission to post my blog a day late. As long as I did something to move it forward, I was okay with that.

The creative writing assignment was my “big unknown.” It’s “important (to me) but not urgent.” Knowing my process, however, I wanted to get a draft done so I could let my subconscious work on it overnight. After spending several hours on it in the evening and an hour the next morning, I got it done. That left this blog post.

Sometimes what matters most is having fun. Lounger was a spontaneous "shove some snow against the tree and see what it looks like" creation. Not my best but then again, I didn't set out to make anything specific. I let the snow tell me what it would be. Sometimes allowing spontaneity is useful. — Sometimes what matters most is having fun. Lounger was a spontaneous “shove some snow against the tree and see what it looks like” creation. Not my best but then again, I didn’t set out to make anything specific. I let the snow tell me what it would be. Sometimes allowing spontaneity is useful.

The takeaway: For me, the simple process of prioritizing items and assigning time stamps helped me to accomplish far more than if I’d only had a vague idea of what I wanted to get done. Write it down. Plan it out. “A failure to plan is a plan to fail” certainly appears to be true.

Get Support for What Matters Most

In addition to shaping your environment, making a list of top priorities, and assigning approximate time values to your tasks, it’s important to find appropriate support. That might be from a coach, a friend, a relative, an accountability partner, or even a support animal. My monthly walk-and-talks with a writing friend remind me to continue to expand my world, not only with Ajax but also with the people who are most important to me.

The American robin is so common that we don't take them for granted. When was the last time you studied a simple bird in brilliant light? Against a clear blue winter sky, the red breast of this robin on top of a tree really popped. — The American robin is so common that we don’t take them for granted. When was the last time you studied a simple bird in brilliant light? Against a clear blue winter sky, the red breast of this robin on top of a tree really popped.

Do you have any helpful tips for readers about shaping your environment to support your goals? How about creative strategies around keeping lists? Share them in the comments so we can all learn.

Featured

Power of Yet: How To Use It to Move Forward

Do you have specific areas in your life where things are going great and others where you feel stuck? Me too. On today’s ramble with Ajax, I got caught in hail and started thinking about Mother Nature mirroring the indecision swirling inside of me. This week’s post boils down to a single word to keep you moving forward: the power of yet.

Mt. Baker from what I call the "Cedar Park stairs" in north Seattle on a beautiful evening in February. If you have a summit (read: goal) you are striving for, keep at it. The only way you won't reach it is if you quit. Therein lies the power of yet. — Mt. Baker from what I call the “Cedar Park stairs” in north Seattle on a beautiful evening in February. If you have a summit (read: goal) you are striving for, keep at it. The only way you won’t reach it is if you quit. Therein lies the power of yet.

How to Use Yet Instead of Now

This simple three-letter word carries enormous weight. Especially if you struggle with a fixed mindset. Where I suffer from a fixed mindset is around marketing and technology. While I take baby steps forward, sometimes I want to give up. Sound familiar?

If you frequently catch yourself using phrases such as, “I can’t do this,” “I’ll never figure this out,” or “it’s impossible,” stop thinking of now. Rewrite your statement using the word yet and see what happens to your physiology, mental outlook, and overall mood.

Whitehorse and Three Fingers seen from northeast Seattle on a clear February evening. — Whitehorse and Three Fingers as seen from northeast Seattle on a clear February evening.

Carol Dweck’s Ted Talk

In her ten-minute Ted Talk, Carol Dweck introduces the power of yet in her research on mindsets. She says that by using the word yet instead of now, we signal to our brains that whatever we’re struggling with is worth working for. Fortunately, we can build a growth mindset just like we can develop strong legs or biceps.

Ramble Power

I originally created my ramble project with Ajax to explore mindfulness, learn to be more fully present, and experience joy in tiny moments. Add to that my ongoing coursework with Precision Nutrition and I have added to my Big Why: I want to grow a growth mindset and rewrite my personal narrative to reflect more positivity and optimism.

A tall order that’s difficult to quantify — not like “eat three servings of veggies” or “walk ten thousand steps a day.” But it’s what I’m trying to wrap my head around. One ramble at a time.

Decorative grass on the way back from the Jackson Park perimeter walk. — Decorative grass on the way back from the Jackson Park Perimeter trail.

Changing at Glacier Speed

Recent rambles have provided me with insights into my community as well as ample reflection time. Sometimes I joke that I move at “glacier speed.” And I’m referring not to hiking, but to change.

I appreciate the value in challenges, mistakes, and putting myself in uncomfortable situations to grow. But I do so very slowly. Until one day, like a glacier dam releasing a powerful torrent of water, I take off and am unstoppable. It just hasn’t happened. Yet. See how I did that?

One of three colorful murals outside the Cedar Park Elementary School.

Fortunately, I love my ramble project. Ajax and I have been on 22 rambles and it’s not yet March. For me, physical goals are familiar and comfortable. I’ve been creating physical programs for clients for nearly 25 years. But if I could use strengths in a familiar area to help me grow in areas of weakness, would that work?

Albert Davis Park, a playground near Lake City Library. My guess is this fire might have been started by the homeless using the play structure as a windbreak to cook their food. I've seen them do the same thing at a bus stop. — The play structure at Albert Davis Park is currently closed due to fire damage.

Rambles A-I

Highlights from our most recent adventures include:

Albert Davis Park Located near the Lake City Library, this small community park includes a mural, benches, and a play structure that is currently closed due to fire damage.
Bitter Lake Reservoir Open Space has an exercise course, a wonderful play structure, and a community garden. Not a big fan of all the dog feces.

Ajax sniffs at the base of what I call the "Cedar Park stairs" at the corner of 135th NE and NE 42nd in Seattle. — Ajax sniffs at the base of what I call the “Cedar Park stairs” at the corner of 135th NE and NE 42nd in Seattle.

*Cedar Park Two blocks east of the school, we found fantastic views of Mt. Baker (10,786′), Whitehorse Mountain (6841′), and Three Fingers (6858′) to the north. I stumbled across the 176 stairs one afternoon when I didn’t have my camera, so on another clear evening, we returned for some breathtaking photos of the mountains.

Rambles J-Z

Jackson Park Perimeter Trail 2.2 miles of trail circle the Jackson Park Golf Course in the Thornton Creek Watershed. Unfortunately, a contingent of homeless folks has made sections of the trail feel trashy and unsafe. By staying on the street and sidewalk north and east of the park, you can avoid the worst of the garbage. The city hasn’t found a solution to keep it natural and clean. Yet.

On a recent ramble around the Jackson Park Perimeter trail, I shot a picture of my shadow and the light-rail construction. I continue to be amazed by how beautiful the golf course is while the surrounding area has become a garbage dump.

*Licorice Fern Natural Area A ravine south of Jackson Park Golf Course, east of a community pea patch.
*Llandover Woods Greenspace A remarkably dense, quiet, wooded area with lovely birdsong. It includes a narrow view of the Olympic Mountains above some stairs on what’s referred to as the “south loop.”
South Woods Park Just south of Shorecrest High School. We took refuge from today’s hail until it turned to rain.

Llandover Woods at noon on a beautiful winter weekday.

Power of Yet in the Licorice Fern Natural Area

Of all the recent rambles 15-22, our Licorice Fern Natural Area outing impressed me the most. We headed down a dead-end street to explore and spotted a trailhead.

The Licorice Fern Natural Area starts off with maintained boardwalks but we quickly found ourselves getting sucked into mud when several of the bridges collapsed. — The Licorice Fern Natural Area starts off with nicely maintained boardwalks. Yay, a new area to explore!

The neighborhood community created a website for the area, last updated in 2019. From the looks of it, that’s probably when they last maintained the trail.

A New Challenge

Something about the overgrown nature of the area made me grin. I have never gotten as disoriented inside the Seattle city limits as I did on those game trails. Awesome! Until I nearly lost one of my shoes to the slurping mud.

We finally bushwhacked upslope and found ourselves in an alley. I felt a tiny smidgen of what contestants on the History channel’s series, Alone, must feel when they arrive in the middle of nowhere to survive by themselves for as long as they can.

Return to the Power of Yet

And so, we return once again to where we started: with the single word yet. I entered the natural area expecting one thing and got something else. We got completely turned around. And when we emerged, we’d been scraped by blackberry vines, Ajax was coated in mud, and I’d gotten utterly confused. But I never thought, “I can’t.” Could I use “Licorice Fern” as a metaphor for change?

Change means we become different people. These rambles remind me of how confident I am in some areas of my life, such as photography, writing, physical movement, and coaching. I am not as confident in others, such as parenting a teen, big life changes, marketing, and technology. Yet.

The Licorice Fern area will serve as my metaphor for change. The power of yet is strong.

I remind myself that I am and always will be a work in progress. I can embrace opportunities for growth and learning. Just like I dove into Licorice Fern without knowing anything about it. I can embrace change, and work to change yet into now.

What is your experience with fixed and growth mindsets? If you have insights that you’d like to share about your experience with the word yet please share them in the comments so we can all learn.

Featured

How to Expand Life One Outing at a Time

I won’t lie: last week challenged me in unexpected ways. I have been trying to move forward since my daughter started college six months ago. Since she’s merely fifteen minutes away, I feel like I take five steps forward only to retreat two steps back whenever she comes home. This weekend I took a leap of faith and planned an outing with a friend before I knew my daughter’s plans. I am determined to expand life one outing at a time.

In an attempt to expand life, I visit thousands of snow geese and trumpeter swans in the Skagit Valley at dawn with the Olympic Mountains in the background.

The Skagit Valley Birding Invitation

Five of the things I love the most include movement, photography, wildlife, helping, and writing. Put them all together and bingo, a blog is born. I also love my family, and since my daughter comes home on weekends, I feel obligated to stick around whenever she visits. A friend invited me to bird with her in the Skagit Valley an hour north of Seattle. We’re gaining more birding practice for an upcoming trip with friends to Arizona in April. But when she mentioned wanting to bird all day, I gulped.

This would be the first all-day trip without my husband, daughter, or dog in more than three years. And on a weekend when my daughter was visiting. In November, my husband and I took eight days to bird in southeast Texas. So it’s not like I haven’t been away from her for an extended time. But something about this invitation challenged me in a new way. This was another step toward releasing the apron strings. Why is it so hard?

Expand Life: Enjoy a Skagit Sunrise

At 6:30 my friend promptly arrived and I sneaked out the front door, leaving my sleeping husband and daughter and a very unhappy dog. Ajax knows what it means when I put on my hiking togs, and he is always eager to join me. Not this time. I later learned that he complained loudly for quite a while after I left, waking up the household.

The view from the Fir Island Farm Estuary in the Skagit at sunrise, with a pair of bald eagles on the snag toward the left.

I felt quite emotional on the drive north. Shouldn’t I be the proper hostess for my daughter? Shouldn’t I be there to take her back to campus? Fortunately, I was able to talk through my difficulties with my friend. By the time we reached our first stop, I had a clear head and buoyed spirit. At the Fir Island Farm Estuary, the sunrise was spectacular. Snow geese, trumpeter swans, and waterfowl were plentiful, and people were few. I focused on my surroundings as Mother Nature helped me heal.

Contributing to Science on Ebird.org

One of several bright moments from the all-day birding trip was contributing to science. When I go with my friend or my husband, I let them record our bird sightings and report them on Ebird.org. This wonderful website is affiliated with Cornell University. Many thousands of bird enthusiasts can keep track of their observations online. Researchers and other birders can then track and learn where target birds are.

Yellow-headed blackbird (left) joins a red-winged blackbird (top) and house sparrow (right in flight) at a local feeder. — A yellow-headed blackbird (left) joins a red-winged blackbird (top) and house sparrow (right in flight) at a local feeder.

On this trip, we made a brief stop at a field where red-winged blackbirds, European starlings, and Brewer’s blackbirds were feeding. Through my 100-400 mm camera lens, I noticed a bird with a yellow head and chest. Definitely not one of the other three species. My friend immediately identified it as a yellow-headed blackbird, a bird I’d seen before, but a rarity for this time of year and location. We followed the YHBB (pictured left) to a nearby feeder where it joined house sparrows and red-winged blackbirds to enjoy breakfast. Score! I had proof of the rarity in the photos.

Expand Life: Watch Short-Eared Owls In Flight

Another memorable moment occurred in the early afternoon when we arrived at the Skagit destination called the “East 90.” The main road takes a sharp right turn, and it lies east of another sharp right known as “West 90.” Flying low over the field were at least half a dozen short-eared owls, one of my target birds for the day.

These little guys are open-country hunters, one of the few that can be spotted foraging during the late afternoon. My friend explained that she likes to plan birding outings with newer birders so that there’s a highlight toward the end. That way she’ll have company in the future. I smiled. That sounded like what coaches do in training sessions: we end on a high note.

A short-eared owl on the hunt. — A short-eared owl hunts for supper.

Memorable Moments

On our return drive to Seattle, I asked my friend a question that I grew up hearing often: what was your best or favorite moment? My husband and daughter hate questions like that. This time, I used her answer as a teachable moment. I rephrased my question: were there any memorable or takeaway moments from the day that stood out to her?

The Takeaway Challenge

I proceeded to mention my three to her: the spectacular sunrise, spotting the yellow-headed blackbird rarity, and watching the short-eared owls forage.

Something my parents recently mentioned came to me. It’s called their “penny jar project.” It’s an opportunity to expand their world post-COVID. Every time they explore a new neighborhood or try something outside their comfort zone, they add a penny to the jar. (To account for inflation I might suggest a “dollar jar…”) Once you accumulate enough money, you can put it toward something you enjoy to celebrate your courage.

How might you gamify your own challenges to encourage your success? I took on a playful challenge in January to create the Active Ajax Adventures project. I created my blog to have something positive come out of COVID time. And the birding trip coming up in April is helping me expand my world by taking birding trips to practice and prepare.

Another favorite, the Great Blue Heron. — Another favorite bird, the Great Blue Heron.

While agreeing to go on this weekend trip was a challenge for me, I definitely made the right decision. I have a life apart from my daughter, and it’s okay — no, necessary — to explore outside one’s comfort zone. It helps her, as well, to know that we are all trying new things, taking on new challenges, and growing.

If you have a new challenge you’re facing in 2023 and would like life coaching assistance, feel free to reach out to me at www.bodyresults.com or comment below. I’d love to help!

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Nudge the Notch: How to Inch Forward

A well-known Buddhist saying goes, “When the student is ready, the teacher appears.” I must be on the edge of great change because teachers have been showing up everywhere during the past month. Instead of judging myself harshly, and seeing less-than-perfect as a failure, I’ve embraced the idea that I will always be a work in progress. No more pressure. Join me for photos from a Tiger Mountain ramble in January as we explore how to nudge the notch to reach your target.

Mt. Rainier on January 26 seen from W. Tiger 1. For much of the morning, we hiked in fog or clouds. W. Tiger 3 had a thin layer of snow that only increased as we continued to W. Tiger 2 and 1.

Replace Binary Thinking with Nudge the Notch

In the past, I have had a tendency to see things as black or white, success or failure. Precision Nutrition teaches coaches to encourage clients to move along a continuum. This means that in order to get someone who drinks a ton of coffee, juice, or soda to switch to 64 ounces of water a day, the best way to get them to change is to encourage them to do one notch better.

Maybe they could move from a “1” (no water) to a “2” (eight ounces of water a day) by adding a bottle of mineral water to their workout. Or replacing one daily soda or coffee with eight ounces of water. Perhaps adding sliced lemon or lime to a water bottle for flavor will make it more palatable.

The westward view of the Olympic Mountains above a sea of clouds, seen from West Tiger 1.

Nudge the Notch Examples

If you struggle to eat vegetables, are there any that you enjoy? Can you aim for one serving a day, such as tomato slices on a burger, diced and added to a salad, or served on the side of an omelet? If you are totally swamped at work and can’t find a minute to exercise, can you put on music and dance while doing house chores on the weekend? Maybe you could commit to ditching social media once a week to take a ten-minute walk at lunch. And if you are trying to write a book but life keeps getting in the way, could you set an alarm for a five-minute sprint to scribble a paragraph or two?

Halo effect on West Tiger 1. The sun was low behind me as I looked north into the forest on the top of Tiger Mountain. We can view logging as horrid, or we can enjoy the remaining beauty. How will you nudge the notch today?

One Percent Better

This idea of moving along a continuum has been expressed in other ways. James Clear, the author of Atomic Habits, suggests doing 1% better each day. If you start with a goal of 5000 steps a day and add 50 steps (1%) every day, eventually you’ll reach the optimal 10,000 daily steps without having suffered any pain, strain, or struggle. You will have a far easier time succeeding on this type of program than if you never find a way to leave the office, or worse, label your goal as “too hard” and abandon it before you ever try.

Build Your Change Muscles

The beauty in using continuum and 1% thinking is “sneaking up on your goal.” Such thinking involves taking tiny chances. Trying small new things. Learning from tolerable mistakes. Taking one baby step at a time. These are ways to build those change muscles so you can do bigger and better things. My Active Ajax Adventures project is a form of continuum thinking. When I am unable to get out to the mountains every week, AAA gives me another way to focus on my six intentions. It has removed any lingering “should” thoughts so I no longer feel guilty if I can’t spare a day for a hike. Win!

A new bench at the summit of W. Tiger 1 near the Hiker's Hut. Just to the left of the hut is a new fence that bars access to a newly decommissioned trail. Instead, the Poo Top Trail diverts hikers south around W. Tiger 1. — A new bench at the summit of W. Tiger 1 near the Hiker’s Hut. Just to the left of the hut is a new fence that bars access to a newly decommissioned trail. Instead, the Poo Top Trail diverts hikers south around W. Tiger 1.

Continuum Project

So where have we rambled the last two weeks? In addition to Tiger Mountain, our project has taken me to local parks that include:

Sunset School Park
The grounds around Innis Arden Clubhouse
Little Brook Park
Paramount School Park (aka Shoreline Skate Park)
Paramount Open Space

I continue to appreciate the importance of urban greenspaces, from the tiny 1-acre Little Brook Park set among multi-family apartments, to the forested Paramount Open Space with a small maze of trails. It’s hard to believe that the wonderful suburban area where we live was once covered with green spaces. I am so grateful to the cities for keeping these recreational spaces intact.

One of the strangest finds at Paramount Open Space - trees growing up through an old abandoned wheeled machine of some sort. — One of the strangest finds at Paramount Open Space – trees growing up through an old abandoned wheeled machine of some sort.

Another strange find that made me smile was a decorated bird standing on a log on one of the many maze-like trails at Paramount Open Space.

Nudge the Notch in Journaling

The final example of “nudge the notch” I will share is journal writing. As an avid diarist for over four decades, I’d love to introduce folks to journal writing. This January, I joined the International Association for Journal Writing in hopes that I could explore ways to incorporate journaling into my Body Results coaching practice. Fortunately, several clients are interested in exploring journal writing with me. Win!

I am a proud member of the IAJW.org. If you or someone you know are interested in learning more about journaling to get unstuck, I am more than happy to share what I know!

Find Your “One Notch Better”

Life contains infinite shades of gray. You are not “good” or “bad” for eating foods that disagree with you. You have simply made less-than-optimal choices. And you are not a failure if you don’t consistently drink 8 eight-ounce glasses of water a day. By recognizing where we’re making incremental, “one notch better” progress, we can celebrate our successes, and do more of the good and less of the suck.

Here's my visual record of blogging in January, including a special appearance by my first guest blogger. — Here’s my visual record of blogging in January, including a special appearance by my first guest blogger.

Takeaway Challenge:

Think of a habit you want to change. What might ONE NOTCH BETTER look like for you? The goal here is to overcome inertia by taking that first step. Once you get momentum behind you and start building a new habit, it gets easier.

If you like, try what I call “gamifying” your intention. Use a playful approach to turn it into a game, akin to my Active Ajax Adventures. Embrace your inner child! I use stickers for anything I need to build momentum behind. Such as blogging at least one day a week. Then share in the comments a short report of what you want to do one notch better in February.

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A Failed Perfect Plan: How To Reap the Rewards

By Guest Blogger Gerard Bonfils My June 2022 plan (note from the editor: Gerard is a MASTER planner!) was to hike 280 miles on the Pacific Crest Trail in northern California. I started training in late 2021 so that I would begin my trek in peak form. When not training, I spent hours learning everything about my route, preparing resupply packages with food and trail essentials, reading comments previous hikers had left about this trek, and plotting my daily mileage and potential camping spots. I felt great about my plan. Then it completely fell apart before I even set foot on the trail… and I reaped the rewards of a failed perfect plan.

Preparing resupply boxes to be shipped by General Delivery to local post offices, or stores/motels along the way. These boxes are in fact for another long hike I would take later that year. For the June 22 hike, I only used half of the boxes I had prepared.

In Praise of Play-Doh and Legos

I approached planning the wrong way or, at least, in too narrow a way. After a series of pre-hike injuries, unusually late snowfall, forecasted storms, and forest closures, I could not execute my plan the way I initially built it. That was a blessing. I traded Excel for imaginary Play-Doh and Legos and made a “plan” I could, at any time, squish here, stretch there, remove blocks from, and then put back in a different way.

This new plan captured Intentions instead of laying down a rigid play-by-play of the whole 280 miles. Where I had previously focused on “crossing the finish line on D day”, I now focused on the experiences I wanted to have along the way: be fully aware while in nature, crave surprises, play with the elements, roam the land, cultivate self-sufficiency, and so on.

Heading north on the Hat Creek Rim, a stretch of 30+ miles without natural water sources. A local rancher generously built and regularly resupplies a water tank for the hikers on this section. No wonder such souls are called "Trail angels." — Heading north on the Hat Creek Rim, a stretch of 30+ miles without natural water sources. A local rancher generously built and regularly resupplies a water tank for the hikers on this section. No wonder such souls are called “Trail angels.”

A Cornucopia of Summits

My initial plan had only one finish line: complete the 280 miles, walking a 3-foot-wide trail. No wiggle room! With my new organic and flexible plan, I suddenly discovered many hidden personal summits. Showing up at the trailhead, my injuries not fully healed, was a summit. Completing 46 miles to my first resupply in the first 2 days was another. Successfully treating an impressive blister on day 3, a third. They kept growing.

Continuing my hike with a storm in the forecast. Getting lost and then found through a snowfield in the storm. Watching a bear cub run downslope toward its Mom. Keeping mostly warm and dry through rainstorms. “Running into” another hiker and walking a whole day together … more summits, or GAINS, than I could have dreamed of. So much to enjoy by LIVING the trail, not just FINISHING the trail.

Just a few feet off the trail, the resident wildlife is enjoying some people-watching in the form of an intermittent flow of huffing and puffing hikers. Note: Mom was close by and eyeing me with suspicion and a bit of fighting spirit in her pupils.

Failed Perfect Plan: Smiling at Misfortunes

Blisters, storms, and getting lost: no, not everything felt like a blissful “walk in the park”. I even aborted my hike at mile 130 with fresh and debilitating injuries. Yet, even “in the moment”, I strove to embrace adversity with a smile. My first impulse was always something resembling the classic “Oh NO, why ME?”. Only when I made a habit of deliberately smiling or chuckling at the unwelcome turn of events did my luck change.

This little bubble of a tent may seem peaceful and reasonably cozy. Adding the soundtrack of the howling wind and the constant downpour on my refuge's canopy would make this feel a whole lot different. — This little bubble of a tent may seem peaceful and reasonably cozy. Adding the soundtrack of the howling wind and the constant downpour on my refuge’s canopy would make this feel a whole lot different.

Of course, my luck did NOT truly change, but my ability to gracefully accept the “bad hand” I was given greatly improved; I traded frustration for a playful spirit (challenge accepted, Lady Fate!) and cool-headed actions. Suddenly, as if by pure magic, I discovered ways around or through my woes. It only took a freeze frame, the very moment something went sideways, followed by a light-hearted assessment of the new reality.

After two and a half days of rain, the sun finally goes into drying duty. This is also a great time to sit down, munch on snacks, and release achy feet from their lugged prison, and rejoice at my good luck.

The Highest Summit

None of the personal “summits” I tagged on that hike felt as rewarding as the first one: at the trailhead, my wife had taken a few pictures before driving 350 miles back home; I had started walking alone with no certainties about the journey forward: will my injuries flare and force me to give up? Will I reach 280 miles? Will I become hypothermic in the storm?

Little did I know, at the time, that I had already succeeded: I SHOWED UP! I had given it a truly honest “shot”. In the words of C. Bradford: “There is no failure except in no longer trying”. I was TRYING. And I would keep trying through that stormy June until it was no longer wise or safe to do so.

Had I not shown up, I would never have walked through this magic Christmas Tree Forest and received the gift of the last sunny spot Mother Nature offered me before letting the big faucet in the sky run unchecked for more than two days.

Failed Perfect Plan: Facing the Gap

After 130 miles, at the bottom of a 10-mile downhill, my ankles both simultaneously cried “Uncle!” This being a resupply stop anyway, I got a motel room and retired for the night. In the morning, both ankles had put on quite a bit of weight and raucously protested when I tried to walk. I had failed!

Yes, the thought quickly broke into the antechamber of my mind. I immediately pushed it away. I had gone as far as was reasonable, I saw wonders on the way, I found my way through many challenges, I met a new friend… This WAS a true success, and I felt happy and at peace.

As I headed for what would be the last stretch of my hike, Mt. Shasta greeted me to the north. I spent the next two days at its base. The driver I hitched a ride with informed me that people died on the mountain the final night I had curled up in my tent waiting for the storm to pass -- a reminder of what matters most. — As I headed for what would be the last stretch of my hike, Mt. Shasta greeted me to the north. I spent the next two days at its base. The driver I hitched a ride with informed me that people died on the mountain the final night I had curled up in my tent waiting for the storm to pass — a reminder of what matters most.

Creating More Joy from a Premature End

At a standstill in a small northern California town for two days, unable to walk for long, I decided to explore the neighborhood in short bursts. I spent my time sitting in a café and answering questions from locals curious about the disheveled hiker; exploring the library for a few hours; getting a much-needed massage; and roaming the main street to look at storefronts or sit on a low wall for a while.

I eventually discovered a wonderful small park at the foot of Mt Shasta and tacked on another mile and a quarter to my trek… limping along slowly and stopping at every bench on the way. None of this was in my initial grand plan; all of it is now a joyful memory. All I needed to do for this trek was change the stories I told myself about what matters.

A failed perfect plan resulted in this leisurely and wobbly stroll through verdant Sisson Meadow Park as I nursed my swollen ankles and waited for my crew (aka my very supportive wife) to rescue me and bring me back home to start my full recovery. I had six weeks left before starting another trek, this time in Washington State. This time, I would reach the 280 miles mark.

Editor’s note: I’ve been impressed by the thoughtful comments posted by Gerard Bonfils since we met on the Kendall Katwalk summer of 2021. I asked if he would like to share an honorary Guest Blog, and he graciously accepted the challenge. He describes his adventures in California on the Pacific Crest Trail during June, 2022, even tying in wisdom from previous blog posts. I hope readers enjoyed it as much as I did! –C. Schurman

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How to Get Unstuck: Cultivate the Five Ps

Ajax and I recently visited a nearby neighborhood pea patch. I thought about all the effort it takes to cultivate a successful garden. Akin to what it takes to change something about ourselves. As I reflected on Brene Brown’s comments about how “We’re all doing the best we can,” my mindset started to shift. What happens when we cultivate the Five Ps: Patience, Practice, Paying Attention, Play, and Purpose?

We can use the gardening analogy on ourselves: by nurturing ourselves using the five P's, we can cultivate hope, health, and happiness. — We can use the gardening analogy on ourselves: by nurturing ourselves using the five P’s, we can cultivate hope, health, and happiness.

Cultivate Patience

Anything worth doing takes time and patience. We cannot prepare for an active adventure, raise a child, write a book, or create a new business overnight. Likewise, I cannot expect to make a smooth transition from eighteen years of parenting to an empty nest in a few months. Even though that’s what I feel should happen. (Oh, that cursed word!)

Reframing Shift

In a Precision Nutrition course I’m taking called SSR: Sleep, Stress Management, and Recovery, I’m learning about reframing failures and mistakes as important learning opportunities. What if we looked at daunting obstacles as challenges rather than roadblocks? Can we forgive ourselves for triggering episodes that cause guilt or shame? What would it feel like to think of them as the best we could do given the tools we had at the time? Instead of avoiding something because we’re afraid, can we embrace it as a way to grow, learn, and challenge ourselves?

The view from Seahurst lakefront park on Wednesday, January 18, 2023. I am using Active Ajax Adventures to help cultivate a new sense of balance.

The SSR course explains that when the demands of any obstacle outweigh the resources available to us, we get mired in “fight, flight, or freeze” and become stuck. But if we find a way to use all of the internal and external resources we have (including adequate sleep and the five P’s) we can better cope with the demands and move forward.

Takeaway: Glaciers are mighty forces, but the work they do is not inherently obvious until later. Likewise, patience will take us miles beyond frustration. We can actively work to cultivate patience on a daily basis, much like we would brush our teeth, exercise, or eat vegetables. Let’s quit “shoulding” ourselves so we can move forward with patience and grace.

Practice in Seahurst Park

Last week, I got some practice with patience. Ajax and I visited the Seahurst Ed Munro Park, also known as “the jewel of Burien.” It is a saltwater beach on Puget Sound with 3.5 miles of lovely hiking trails through beautiful forests.

As we explored the waterfront on a breezy, chilly, overcast day, I found myself thinking of my daughter. This triggered anxiety, which caused me to become impatient with Ajax, who loves to sniff everything. The whole point of these rambles is to connect with him, not yank him along beside me.

Ajax enjoys a trail in Seahurst Park. — Ajax enjoys a wooded trail in Seahurst Park.

For some unknown reason, the sound of the surf jarred me. But as soon as we found a dirt path that led deep into the woods, my mood improved. I recognized the familiar sound of birdsong. My breathing and heart rate slowed. Ajax loves the woods and the beach equally, as long as he’s with me. However, I’ve learned that I prefer the peaceful beauty and solitude of moss-covered trees.

Takeaway: Practice listening to your body and mind. They ask for what they need. And if you are not in a position to give it to yourself, make a point of setting aside time at lunch, in the evening, or on the weekend to practice.

Pay Attention in Northacres Park

In addition to frequent practice, it helps to pay attention, a practice known as mindfulness. On a recent sunny walk to the Jackson Park Golf Course, I spotted a dog that Ajax doesn’t like. Instead of risking confrontation, we headed toward Northacres Park. But it meant crossing busy Interstate 5, something we don’t do on foot.

Once we reached the off-leash area, I could still hear the din of cars racing by on the freeway a hundred yards away. I could see varied thrushes, robins, and woodpeckers hopping about. But I couldn’t hear them until we left the park and got half a mile away from the freeway. Once I heard chickadees and towhees singing, I felt my jaw unclench. I could once again observe my surroundings and enjoy the peaceful sounds around me.

Ajax plays with a Golden Retriever at the Northacres off-leash dog park. Bigger dogs sometimes intimidate him; not today!

Takeaway: If you feel stuck, pay attention to where in your body you experience it. Is it in your throat? Your muscles? Or your mental faculties? Do you feel dull or sluggish when you’re usually quick and sharp? I think, create, and operate more efficiently with calm, quiet, or natural sounds. As Debbie Tung points out in her graphic novels about being an introvert, working in a large office would make it difficult to be productive.

Cultivate Play in Magnuson Park

This weekend I spent a few hours birding with a friend, without Ajax. As much as I adore our rambles, certain activities go better without him. Four of them include leading field trips, volunteering, scrambling, and birding.

Our goal was to enjoy each other’s company, but we had one target bird in mind: the Bohemian Waxwing, irregularly seen on the west coast. We detected 42 different bird species during the morning outing, including a single Bohemian in a flock of Cedar Waxwings.

Waxwings in a hawthorn at Magnuson Park. Bohemian (upper left) has more red on face and under tail, whereas cedars (lower right two) are more yellowish. — Waxwings in a hawthorn at Magnuson Park. Bohemian (upper left) has more red on the face and under the tail, whereas cedars (lower right two) are more yellowish.

Whenever I feel stuck, getting outside almost always helps. Whether it is the fresh air, a change of scenery, movement, or distraction, I’m not sure. Maybe all of the above. Watching birds forage for food, preen, or flap in puddles has a calming effect on me. Looking up at a huge cedar or Douglas fir does the same thing. If you find yourself spending more time on social media or YouTube than you’d like, grab your shoes and go outside. You might find yourself making headway afterward.

Takeaway: When parenting a college student, I’m learning the importance of keeping track of my own needs. We’d assumed that since our daughter’s roommate was going away for the weekend, she’d stay on campus. I made plans with a friend and I refused to break that commitment. The consequence of our daughter not providing enough notice means she might not get exactly what she wants. Hopefully, if it happens often enough it will teach her to change her habits.

Pull It All Together with Purpose

If we still feel stuck after trying our best to be patient, practice new skills, pay attention, and play, the final “P” is to remind ourselves of our purpose, or our why. We can set our intentions for the current obstacle, even if that is to struggle with grace and presence of mind. Or to ask for help.

This week I have been facing technology issues head-on, practicing breathwork, and allowing myself multiple chances to make mistakes and learn from them. I figure the more I goof on smaller things that don’t matter as much, the more skilled I’ll become for when it does matter. I could set an intention to be lighthearted and playful the next time I mess up, or set the goal of figuring out what it might teach me.

Bundled up for our exploration in Seahurst Park. I prefer the solace, comfort, and wisdom of moss-covered trees to the tumbling surf, especially if I can hear birdsong. — Bundled up for a ramble through Seahurst Park. I prefer the peacefulness of walking among moss-covered trees, especially if I can enjoy birdsong.

Takeaway: I’ve never dealt with an empty nest before. I’m going to make a lot of mistakes. If we can remember that we are not our mistakes, we simply make mistakes, then we can use them as our teachers. I know from the past year that I have physical resilience in spades. Now it’s time to cultivate mental resilience.

As always if something in this post resonates with you and helps you get unstuck in some way, I’d love to read about it in the comments. Joyward!

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Ripple Effect: Tiny Changes Can Make a Powerful Impact

At the start of each new year, it’s tempting to make sweeping changes around work, home, relationships, food, and movement. Instead of tackling everything in your life that needs changing, start with one. Then watch the ripple effect as it impacts other areas of your life. My Ajax ramble project is doing exactly that.

A recent Active Ajax Adventure took my whole family to Meadowbrook on a sunny January afternoon. We even saw nineteen bird species!

Acting On An Intention

You may recall that my intention for 2023 is to have 52 unique Active Ajax Adventures this year. So far we have already visited eight unique parks in January. But what’s interesting about our experiment is noticing how making progress on one goal impacts others. What if you tried the same thing: setting an intention in one area and seeing what changes in other areas of your life?

My recent rambles with Ajax have taken me through the following parks:

Roanoke Park, north of Capitol Hill
Twin Ponds Park, a wooded trail with ducks and massive cedars in Shoreline
Meadowbrook Pond, a stormwater detention and flood-control facility in Seattle
Pinehurst Playground, a small area for kids with play fields and playground equipment
Pinehurst Pocket Park, a tiny neighborhood green space with picnic tables and a Little Free Library across the street

Ajax on our recent Meadowbrook Pond ramble. A ripple effect from our rambles is finding more varied walks every single day.

Recent Rambles

So far, Ajax and I have logged 9 hours of “adventure time” on park walks ranging from 15-109 minutes. Seven we did by ourselves; the other we did with my husband and daughter. Weather conditions were sunny for two of them; the others were overcast or rainy.

Rainy Roanoke

Perhaps the most surprising ramble was following a mid-week Physical Therapy appointment. I’d intended to take Ajax with me to the arboretum, but I decided to go there someday that isn’t so rainy. Instead, we pulled over at the corner of Roanoke and tenth, parked directly across from U. W.’s Oceanography department, and wandered around in a hilly, scenic neighborhood I’d never visited before. Seeing Thomas G. Thompson, the UW’s research vessel, brought back memories of graduate school days.

The Thomas G. Thompson, a research ship affiliated with the University of Washington, sits across the bay in front of the Oceanography building. — The Thomas G. Thompson, a research ship affiliated with the University of Washington, sits across Portage Bay in front of the Oceanography building.

I have always considered myself to be a fair-weather adventurer. This ramble project is teaching me the value of going out in all weather, including downpours. I am discovering local sets of stairs; 80 steps lead up from Queen City Yacht Club to Roanoke Park. And we stumbled upon a downed Heritage Tree, a European white elm, which must have been destroyed in a recent wind or snowstorm as it still had yellow police tape around it.

Roanoke stairs, all 80 of them, lead up the hill from Queen City Yacht Club.

Twin Ponds Park

Twin Ponds Park sits halfway between our house and a Shoreline grocery store I visit on occasion. On days when I’m pressed for time, I’ll take Ajax with me for a little outdoor stroll before I stop at Town and Country. Two of my favorite things about Twin Ponds are the enormous old-growth cedars such as the one pictured below, and winter waterfowl such as wood ducks, buffleheads, wigeons, and mallards.

Enormous cedars and waterfowl are fun to enjoy in winter at Twin Ponds.

Pinehurst Playfield

Our Pinehurst ramble was a bit of an accident. It started with a library walk and then, to take advantage of the fact that it was not rainy, I extended it to the area west of the neighborhood we visited on our Seven Libraries Ramble. Only, we overshot our objective and had to pick up this playfield to make the ramble count toward our 52. Cheating? Hey, the only rules for this project are the ones I make up for myself! The park itself is pretty ordinary, but I find the houses around it fascinating.

Meadowbrook Pond

The highlight of the first 15% of the project was a Saturday afternoon stroll with my dog, husband, and daughter around Meadowbrook Pond. The takeaway from that adventure was to bring a pair of binoculars as the season advances so I can watch for unusual birds. I also really liked having a pair of youthful eyes along with us. Our daughter spotted a Wilson’s snipe, a shorebird I’m not sure we would have seen otherwise. Bonus: we got our kiddo away from her screens!

Ajax carefully avoided the metal grating by the duck ponds.

Ripple Effect: Ramble Benefits

The biggest takeaway from these earliest rambles was observing what happens to my attention. When I am in a familiar neighborhood, I reflect on everyday problems. But in a new area, I focus completely on what’s around me. I’m also discovering:

Paying more attention during our rambles is carrying over to routine walks with Ajax. Now, we go on different routes every time we walk. I hadn’t realized how limited I’d become. How much of our lives do we exist on autopilot? If we don’t remember much about our everyday lives, what can we do to be more present and less numb?
On our walks and rambles, I’m noticing remodeled or renovated houses; homes painted unusual colors; interesting yard decorations; and landscaping changed since the last time we walked these streets.
Finally, I’m experimenting with setting intentions for each walk. Perhaps I pose a question to the multiverse and mull it over. Or, I take a photography prompt and look for multiple possibilities for my photography. What if we set an intention for every outing? How much more mindful and purposeful we could become!

Biggest Ripple Effect? More Joy

The biggest ripple effect I’m experiencing from three weeks of rambling is … more joy in all areas of my life! I love being outside, and visiting new and different places with Ajax is doing exactly as I’d hoped. It’s allowing me to optimize the following:

Appreciate beauty
Connect deeply
Move frequently
Create abundantly
Improve lovingly
Challenge gently

And while our rambles have satisfied my desire and need to be outside, I very much look forward to returning to the mountains soon. If you have noticed any ripple effect from changing a habit in one area and seeing it carry over into others, share that in the comments. I love hearing from readers and I respond to each valid comment.

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An Awesome State Fair Can Help Cultivate Creativity

During this week’s rambles through Hamlin, Roanoke, and Twin Ponds Parks, I found myself pondering creativity. Where do new ideas and interests come from? I reflected on my family’s visits to the Alaska and Washington State Fairs last September. My husband, my daughter, and I all got a very different creativity boost. To cultivate your own creativity, consider visiting an awesome state fair.

If you're looking for awesome creative inspiration, consider visiting the arts and crafts or hobby hall at state fairs. — If you’re looking for awesome creative inspiration, consider visiting the arts and crafts or hobby hall at state fairs.

Alaska State Fair

When we found out that the Alaska State Fair in Palmer was in full swing during our visit to Anchorage and its environs, we decided we could visit both it and the Washington State Fair when we returned to Seattle. What a great way to compare and contrast our visits two weeks apart.

Despite Alaska being the largest state in the country, the state’s largest fair sits on 40 acres in Palmer, AK, and draws 100,000 visitors every summer. Washington State Fairgrounds, by contrast, covers 160 acres and attracts over a million guests. Attendance at the Texas State Fair (the biggest fair in the US) boasts over 2.5 million people. While such stats are interesting, I prefer to consider the exhibits and entertainment at each.

A 4-H contestant shows his steer. We were particularly interested in the tennis ball toppers on the steer's horns. — A 4-H contestant shows his steer. We were particularly interested in the tennis ball toppers on the steer’s horns.

Excellent Exhibits

Alaska State Fair boasts some of the most enormous vegetables I’ve ever seen. Alaskans must put long days of summer sunlight to good use. The award-winning pumpkin in 2022 weighed a whopping 2,147 pounds. And I couldn’t even begin to guess what the gigantic Puffball weighed. It looked a bit like marshmallow fluff that had been sitting out for too long.

This award-winning pumpkin weighed a whopping 2,147 pounds.

Giant puffball, weight unknown. — A giant puffball of unknown weight.

We also enjoyed looking for seven “monster displays” made from flowers and shrubs. The fairgrounds perch between some of the most beautiful mountains in the world. Sure, you can see Mt. Rainier (14,411 feet) from Puyallup, WA on a good day. But compared to the Alaska mountain ranges, our Cascades seem to resemble the “mountainettes” of Asheville, NC where my folks live.

One of seven greenery "Monsters" families could look for. — One of seven greenery “Monsters” families could look for.

Stunning Alaska mountains in September. I must return. — Stunning Alaska mountains in September. I simply must return.

A Day of Entertainment

In addition to great exhibits, we enjoyed no end of entertainment. The last time I’d watched a live Lumberjack show was over a decade ago in Vancouver, BC. While the jokes felt a bit tiresome, the competitors demonstrated remarkable athleticism. We watched Kenai Peninsula pigs race. Our daughter visited the Mineshaft Mobile Gem Mining Adventure cart and added more gems to her collection. I drooled over the spectacular mountain scenery. And we learned more about metal print nature photography. Special thanks to Dan Twitchell of Wild Alaska Art for answering our questions.

Wild Alaska Art had a booth displaying metal prints. Twitchell's images POPPED in a way we hadn't seen before. We immediately saw the promise for some of our own photography. — Wild Alaska Art had a booth displaying metal prints. Twitchell’s images POPPED in a way we hadn’t seen before. We immediately saw the promise for some of our own photography.

Washington State Fair

Two weeks later, we visited the Washington State Fair in Puyallup. Our first stop is always Hobby Hall to view the crafts, photography, quilting, food, and Lego displays. Then we meander among the animal barns, hoping to see the large mother pigs with their piglets.

Mama pig dozes while half her litter of piglets suckles. — Mama pig dozes while half of her litter of piglets suckle.

Legos

Our daughter has entered Lego creations at the Washington State Fair for the past five years or so. In 2021 she received “Reserve Grand Champion” for her Parisian Cupcake Cafe. This year, she entered an organic build of a Brooks Falls grizzly bear fishing in a waterfall. She came up with the idea by watching live bear cameras of Brooks Falls grizzlies catching salmon.

I have no words to describe her beaming face when she saw the “Grand Champion” ribbon next to her entry. She’d finally reached her goal to become the fair’s best builder, at the tender age of 18. Might judging be her next role?

Our daughter's Brooks Falls grizzly bear entry won Grand Champion in the 2022 Lego contest. — Our daughter’s Brooks Falls grizzly bear entry won Grand Champion in the 2022 Lego contest.

Quilling

After finding out that her Lego entry did so well, we wandered over to the paper-folding display to see about her Origami submission. She ended up competing against some beautiful quilled artwork. Quilling is the art of paper rolling and can take infinitely more dexterity, patience, and time than paper folding does.

An exhibitor had set up a display with instructions on how to start quilling. With great interest, we studied the shapes, looked at each other, and exclaimed, “That looks like fun!” The next day, I ordered a beginning quilling set. Within a week, my daughter had mastered enough rolling techniques to make a beautiful holiday card for my parents.

My daughter's early attempts at quilling. Add it to her strong abilities in painting and building, and she's got an unbeatable set of talents! — My daughter’s early attempts at quilling. Add it to her strong abilities in painting and building, and she’s got an unbeatable set of talents!

Novelty

A trip to a state fair invites you to explore or try something new and embrace being a beginner. Whether you are drawn to animals, carving, quilting, canning, photography, needlepoint, or making clothes, you can literally get inspired to try just about anything. Every time I go, I see, do, or learn something new. This year’s unique experiences included seeing pig races in Alaska and personally knowing a Grand Champion from Washington. Pretty special!

TRY THIS: The next time you go to a large public place, give yourself permission to do one thing you never thought you would. Perhaps something you’ve always wanted to but maybe you thought it was just for kids, or you were intimidated for some reason. Maybe you’ll choose to stay for a pig race when you usually just go for the music. Or see what animals are featured in the 4-H tent. Put on that beginner’s mentality and engage your inner child. Give it a try! You might find you like hunting for gemstones or seeking monster gardening displays!

Something for Everyone

I imagine there are plenty of people who go to a state fair for the scones, barbecued ribs, cotton candy, or caramel corn. We make one concession and sometimes get our daughter an ice cream on the way home — like we did this year to celebrate her accomplishment. Others may enjoy the midway rides, games, shopping, or live music. Our favorite fair-going activities include seeing the animals, viewing the arts and crafts, and wandering. My mother would be especially fond of people-watching. State fairs can spark whatever you are interested in.

For my daughter, Legos and paper rolling are natural interests. We also knitted a few rows at a “scarf station.” My husband was intrigued by some of the woodworkers. He found a new way to give thank-you and holiday gifts in metal prints. As for me? Yes, I do my photography and I’m experimenting with quilling. But my big creative boost is turning our adventures into stories, celebrating through words and photographs to motivate and inspire others. Triple-win!

You can count on me to come away with a few favorite photos of inspirational words, like this "Lessons from a Christmas Tree" China plate. — You can count on me to come away with a few favorite photos of inspirational words, like this “Lessons from a Christmas Tree” China plate.

Do you have a favorite state fair memory or moment you want to share? Write it in the comments below. I love hearing from readers.

Featured

Turn Emotions Into Motion: Six Tested Ways

This week, Ajax and I headed north toward Shorecrest High School, where our daughter graduated in June. I used to walk with her to school every morning when she was younger. As Ajax and I reached the 80-acre Hamlin Park just north of campus, I reflected on the curious question she asked us during a recent visit. My Active Ajax Adventures project may be just what I need to make it through this year, as I turn emotions into motion.

For the first time since June 2022, I walked by my daughter's old high school and found myself nostalgic for the many years we used to walk and talk together. Our trip to Hamlin Park helped me turn emotions into motion. — For the first time since June 2022, I walked by my daughter’s old high school and found myself nostalgic for the many years we used to walk and talk together. Our trip to Hamlin Park helped me turn emotions into motion.

A Curious Question

Sunday afternoon, she told us about getting “the blahs.” Did we have any tips for what to do when she lacks the motivation to do anything?

I remained quiet in the back seat, pondering the blog posts I’d written over the last eighteen months. Which of the many tips on getting unstuck would be most relevant for my teenage daughter? I try hard to avoid giving unsolicited advice. But this time, she’d asked.

Ajax poses with a downed root ball at Hamlin Park.

Turn Emotions into Motion

Whenever you’re dealing with tricky emotions, the first suggestion is to get more physical motion. Sound familiar? I suggested leaving her dorm room for a short walk to Drumheller Fountain to see the geese. Or if it’s dark out, she could take a trip up and down the dorm’s ten flights of stairs.

Getting a change of scenery, clearing the mind, and doing something physical can help get the body and mind synched up and moving again. Not to mention providing feel-good endorphins that will bust any down mood!

TRY THIS: Picture the Superman stance, standing tall, hands on hips, and shoulders back. Putting yourself physiologically into this stance can change your state and make you feel ready to tackle the world.

Sensation

Another idea is to pay attention to all five senses. Doing so returns us to the present moment, rather than staying stuck in the past or worrying about unknowns in the future.

TRY THIS: Find three different things to touch, taste, smell, hear, and see, ideally on a walk from the Motion suggestion. Focusing on something other than your problems, even if it’s for a short while, is a great mood-shifter.

The green markings on this stump-turned-face caught my eye from far away. I had to get closer to check it out.

Hobbies

Our daughter loves art, building with Legos, quilling, painting, drawing, and playing flute. Sometimes engaging in a creative endeavor, even for a very short time, can provide momentum. My own include playing the piano, putting together a few pieces in the current jigsaw puzzle, journaling, reading a chapter, or doing a word puzzle on my phone.

TRY THIS: Next time you’re stuck and can’t figure out what to do next, DO SOMETHING, ANYTHING — preferably an activity you enjoy. Keep it short. Wash the dishes. Clean out your handbag or backpack. Put five items in their proper places. Write a letter. Spend five minutes doodling or coloring. Read a page or a chapter in a book. Motion generates flow and gets things going in your body, mind, and spirit.

A handmade quilling card my daughter created a few months ago.

Pomodoro

Set a timer for up to 25 minutes and commit to working on whatever you need to do until the timer rings. This Pomodoro technique is often suggested for students who are overly familiar with procrastination. After your time is up, reward yourself with 5-10 minutes to do something you enjoy. Be sure to set the timer again, so you don’t spend the entire day! Repeat this cycle of 25 minutes on the task and five minutes on something enjoyable until you complete the task.

TRY THIS: Remember the five-minute action? If you are a writer and can’t imagine setting aside 25 uninterrupted minutes, start with sprints for five minutes. Similarly, if you struggle to get in your workouts, commit to showing up and spending 5 minutes. If after five minutes you simply cannot continue, give yourself permission to stop. Often my clients report that they continue much longer once they get started. Breaking through the inertia is the hardest part.

A memorial bench decorated in holiday streamers. Taking five minutes to sit outside on a bench barefoot can improve your mood dramatically.

Turn Emotions Into Motion: Personal Connection

Ask yourself when was the last time you had a conversation with a friend. Can you call or text a classmate or colleague to meet for lunch? Go somewhere public where you’ll run into friendly faces. The dog park, grocery store, or library works for me when I’m feeling isolated. Write a letter to someone you miss.

TRY THIS: Make a list of five people you’d like to connect with. Send one of them an email saying you’d love to get together and suggest a time. It’s quite likely the other person will be grateful you did!

Attitude of Gratitude

Finally, when all else fails, remember that this, too, shall pass. Look around your room at the things you have chosen to surround yourself with. The stuffed animal your grandmother gave you. A card a friend sent. The picture you spent hours working on that turned out just right. By practicing being grateful and appreciating the things around you, you can change your mood and your mindset.

TRY THIS: Make a list of ten things you are grateful for. Your dog. Your quirky nail polish. The A you got on your report. Grilled cheese and tomato soup. Thinking about all the things that are good lightens the hold of the current blahs. Now, take three deep soothing breaths and turn to whatever you need to do. Go to it!

Two mounted guns from the USS Boston, 1898.

Turn Emotions Into Motion in Hamlin Park

Ajax and I made our way around standing puddles and rivulets coming off steeper trails. But water droplets on the trees sparkled in the sunlight. Birds chittered happily in steaming woods. Yes, I missed my daughter. But these rambles with Ajax allow me to connect with parts of myself I don’t otherwise give myself time and space to acknowledge.

After each ramble, I return ready to work. What caught my eye this time? A 3-year-old black Lab named Bronx. Two large guns from the USS Boston, dated 1898, were mounted near the playground. A bent tree is pictured below. A stump painted green. And on our way back, steaming fences where the sun’s rays hit.

Turn emotions into motion. By paying attention to sensory details, I get out of my head and into my body. This helps ground and refresh me.

During our rambles, my senses come alive. I pay attention to things I don’t otherwise notice during everyday activities. Going on long walks with Ajax is like an invitation — permission — to move on. By heightening my awareness during our rambles, I find myself being more present on our daily walks. Something appears to be changing. And if I can turn emotions into motion and move forward, perhaps the strategies outlined above will work for my daughter as well.

Try them out. If you have comments, leave them for me below. I love hearing from readers.

Featured

Discovering My Big Why While Exploring Local Parks

In my last post, I mentioned starting a project dubbed “Active Ajax Tuesdays.” The goal is to explore 52 different outdoor venues with Ajax this year. I’ve renamed it to “Active Ajax Adventures.” Triple A is easier to remember. I promised myself I would not focus all of my next 52 posts on my weekly excursions. But I will use my project as a metaphor for getting unstuck and then share any discoveries. This brings me to today’s post on discovering my Big Why.

We visited six Little Free Libraries in our neighborhood. "Take a book, return a book" is the organization's slogan. — We visited six Little Free Libraries in our neighborhood. “Take a book, return a book” is the organization’s slogan.

Walks with Ajax

As background, over the past seven years, I figure I’ve walked my dog roughly 8,000 times (he’s 7.5 years old, so 3 times a day, 365 days a year, give-or-take for inclement weather, illness, or travel). If you repeat the same walk, it’s enough to drive anyone bonkers. For variety, we venture to the public library or nearest grocery store. And I’ve explored enough places in our neighborhood to know where all the Little Free Libraries, holiday displays, and active water fountains are. But I’m ready for the change this project will bring.

Seven Library Loop

On a cool, overcast Tuesday morning, Ajax and I headed out for what I call the “Seven Library Loop.” You won’t find it referenced anywhere. It’s a product of my own creation. It takes us past the Lake City Library in north Seattle and meanders past six community Little Free Library boxes. For this walk, we headed farther south than usual, through a neighborhood I rarely visit.

Our first Active Ajax Adventure of the year took us through Virgil Flaim Park, a local park where I used to take my daughter as a toddler.

One of the parks we passed is Virgil Flaim Park. It boasts a playground and “skate spot” for skateboard enthusiasts. We meandered south toward Lake City Way and detoured down into the wooded ravine west of the heavily trafficked road so Ajax could get a drink of water.

On our first ramble, the best find that sparked joy was a handmade ladder leaning up against a marvelous big tree. I smiled as I remembered playing games outside as a child. Spud, Capture the Flag, Sardines, Flashlight Tag, tree climbing, and Red Rover were summer evening favorites growing up north of Milwaukee, Wisconsin.

A hand-hewn ladder leaning up against an enormous moss-covered, climbable tree near Lake City Way.

Boeing Creek and Shoreview Parks

Our second ramble took us northwest to Shoreline’s Boeing Creek and Shoreview Parks. We had overcast, drizzly mornings for both urban walks, but that didn’t stop us. Hidden Lake is currently bone-dry except for a creek running through the middle. I vaguely recalled that the last time we visited in late summer, I had seen a community announcement about the lake being dredged in the future.

Hidden Lake is currently being dredged. One of the reasons I've enjoyed going to Shoreview Park is to see waterfowl on the small lake. Now that I know it is no longer there, I will put Boeing Park on my list for 2024 to see what the end of the restoration project looks like. — Hidden Lake is currently being dredged. One of the reasons I’ve enjoyed going to Shoreview Park is to see waterfowl on the small lake. Now that I know it is no longer there, I will put Boeing Park on my list for 2024 to see what the end of the restoration project looks like.

I had a second surprise. Ajax headed up a steep bank while I chose to traverse the stream bank. All of a sudden my left foot slipped and I landed in the icy January flow. Fortunately, this is not Alaska! As long as I kept moving, I was at no risk of problems other than a squishy shoe. I did, however, pay more attention to my footing for the rest of our trip. For future rambles, I will take note: If Ajax is wary, choose a different route.

Documenting mishaps only takes a quick snap of the cell phone. A picture is worth a thousand words; this one of my drenched left shoe will always put me back in Boeing Creek having missed one of the stepping stones!

Find Your Big Why: Ask Five Why’s

The biggest takeaway was the question: “Why would anyone else care about this?” It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about your goal, as long as it ENERGIZES YOU, whatever your reasons may be. You are not setting intentions to please anyone other than yourself. I’ve spent most of my adult life worrying about what other people think. No more. This is a project for me and Ajax alone. But if what I learn can help others, awesome. It does bring up the question, however: “Why THIS project, now?”

Repeat Why Five Times

Enter the Five Why’s. As you reflect on your intentions, ask yourself, five times: WHY am I willing to devote the time, energy, money, and resources to do this thing?

Using the Active Ajax Adventures project as an example, my first answer was that I need some sort of long-term project to look forward to. Right now, my volunteer activities have pretty much disappeared, my daughter has left for college, my company is in transition, and I’m between big writing projects, lacking climbing partners, and facing mid-life. Seems like a great time to jump-start things.

My little adventurer in Boeing Creek Park. His big why is easy to identify: for the for the pee-mail pupdates, of course! — My little adventurer in Boeing Creek Park. His big why is easy to identify: for the pee-mail pupdates, of course!

Why does having a long-term project matter? Through it, I hope to discover some new things about myself, have creative adventures with my dog, enjoy nature, and explore my community.

Why do those things matter? Because they are part of my values. I feel alive and energized when I’m learning new things and connecting with nature.

Why is it important to feel energized? Because the alternative is numbing out or missing out.

My Big Why

And finally, I asked myself: why is it important not to miss out? The past is behind me and I cannot control the future, but I can take charge of what I do today. If I squander now, I’m wasting my one and only precious life. So, ultimately, this project is my way to explore mindfulness, learn to be more fully present, and experience joy in tiny moments.

Having recognized that the AAA project not only fits with my long-term values and provides me with a teachable tool for the year, I am even more committed to following through than when I dreamed up the idea less than a week ago. You can use the tool to get leverage on yourself in whatever project or goal you are currently undertaking.

A sign at Boeing Creek Park spoke to me. As parks and cityscapes change, so, too, is my inner landscape. Embrace change. Where can you use the Five Whys to your advantage?

As always, I welcome your questions, insights, or comments. Feel free to share the results of your exploring the Five Whys so we can all learn and grow.

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How to Set Intentions for 2023

It’s a brand new year, a time when people often make resolutions. Not me. I set intentions. Remember an earlier blog post (May 2022) on reframing our self-talk? To me, intention, defined as an aim or plan, has a more positive connotation than resolution, defined as “to settle or find a solution to.” I want to surround myself with positive people and positive words. I am also replacing “I must,” “I should,” and “I will” with “I want” and “I choose.” Let’s explore how you might set intentions for 2023.

"Moments" is my keyword for 2023. That single word reminds me of what I want to commit to in 2023. I set intentions to be more present and to pay attention to tiny moments of joy, such as the spectacular sunrise on 1/2/23. — “Moments” is my keyword for 2023. That single word reminds me of what I want to commit to in 2023. I set intentions to be more present and to pay attention to tiny moments of joy, such as the spectacular sunrise on 1/2/23.

Move Toward Instead of Away From

James Clear, author of Atomic Habits, writes about moving toward something instead of away. Which are you? I confess: when people ask me what I want, I often say, “I don’t know, but I know what I don’t want.” Sound familiar?

This year, I have determined six things I want to do more of:

Appreciate beauty
Connect deeply
Move frequently
Create abundantly
Improve lovingly
Challenge gently

I can hear you now, probably referring to my post from last January. “But Court, those aren’t SMART goals. Where’s the Specificity? Metrics? Actions? Realism? Time-stamp?” Right. But I never called these GOALS.

When you feel like you're about to go under, jot down some of your favorite moments. This form of gratitude can give you a moment of peace and help you reframe your reality. How can you get more joyful moments into your days? — When you feel like you’re about to go under, jot down some of your favorite moments. This form of gratitude can give you a few moments of peace and help you reframe your reality. How can you get more joyful moments into your days?

Set Intentions Using Values

Think of INTENTIONS as values or principles that steer you through life. They are as much a part of us as sleeping, eating, exercising, and breathing. If you can remember what matters most to you at the foundational level, you can use those values to help you make decisions about what to include in your day. Once you know what you value, seek to include more.

The sixth intention, challenge gently, stretches me outside of my comfort zone. I remember the first time I went into Lake Washington on New Year’s Day for the annual Polar Bear Plunge. It was a challenge. Now it’s just a quirky, fun tradition, something I look forward to every January first. I trust that things I currently perceive as stretches will become more familiar and common with practice.

I start my year with my first set intention: taking the Polar Bear Plunge at Matthews Beach. This year the air and water temperature matched: 46 F. Thank goodness for hot tubs!

Active Ajax Adventures

My six intentions have culminated in a fun “moving toward” challenge. I call it “Active Ajax Adventures.” (AAA for short. I love my shorthanded acronyms!) These will look similar to Julia Cameron’s Artist Dates, only done with my dog. My chosen day is Tuesday, rain or shine. I will do something active with Ajax. This could be a hike in the mountains or a park. It could be “sniffer” training, or nose work, which he loves. We can do something shorter like visit an off-leash dog park. Or we can find new neighborhoods to explore on our walks. Something new and different every week. For us both. And something I look forward to. No dread.

Ajax on Tiger Mountain Trail New Year's Eve morning 2022. He absolutely loves hiking with me and I love giving him adventures. The "Active Ajax" idea came to me on our 8-mile hike and seems like a wonderful challenge for 2023. — Ajax on Tiger Mountain Trail New Year’s Eve morning 2022. He absolutely loves hiking with me and I love giving him adventures. The “Active Ajax” idea came to me on our 8-mile hike and seems like a wonderful challenge for 2023.

Combining Intentions

What is exciting about this project is it creatively combines all six intentions. By documenting our outings on camera, I will pay more attention to my surroundings (appreciate beauty) while also connecting with my dog. “Active Ajax” means (bonus!) I will be active, too. The “create abundantly” part will play into my choice of location and how I document our adventures. “Improve lovingly” means improving my mood, well-being, self-definition, and exploration of our region. Wins all around!

I’ve even given myself permission to shift by a few days if the weather doesn’t cooperate. If one of us is sick, or if I find myself over-committed on a Tuesday, perhaps Wednesday or Thursday will work better. The intention is to have 52 unique adventures with Ajax in 2023.

Appreciating beauty is one of my set intentions. Mossy logs covered in fungus on Tiger Mountain Trail, 12/31/22.

Set Intentions: Try This

Several weeks ago I wrote about using journaling to find your strengths, values, and priorities. If you have that list handy, pull it out. Now, from your list, choose three to six values that you want to focus on in the coming months. Reflect on those values on a few walks. See if some creative idea comes to you that merges all of them together like the Active Ajax example.

If not, that’s totally fine; think of how you can set an intention to get more of that value in your life. Instead of “lose twenty pounds” can you choose a “moving toward” goal like “play pickleball weekly with a friend” or “set a step minimum with a reward for succeeding”? The more playful, the better. And announcing your intention to someone who acts as an accountability partner also helps. I have all of my readers to hold me accountable!

Just one look at my beaming face when I'm out in nature is enough to solidify my commitment to Ajax. We both love it; I'm the one who makes it happen. So I'm setting intentions to document our adventures and share what we learn on this "intention" quest. — Just one look at my beaming face when I’m out in nature is enough to solidify my commitment to Ajax. We both love it; I’m the one who makes it happen. So I’m setting intentions to document our adventures and share what we learn on this “intention” quest.

If you have an unusual intention for 2023 or would like suggestions for how to make it more likely that you will follow through, share them in the comments section below. I love to hear from my readers and respond to each credible post.

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How to Make Over Your Kitchen

Release Stress: How to Use Breathwork Techniques

Congratulations, you made it through the holidays. Perhaps you’re feeling a little overwhelmed with your recent choices. Ready to move forward? Pull out your Traffic Lights list of “green, yellow, and red-light” foods. Now is the perfect time to create a plan to make over your kitchen.

That includes getting rid of the four containers of mint chocolate chip ice cream you forgot you had stashed for emergencies. The fruitcake your aunt brought over and left behind. Bags of chips you bought on sale. Holiday leftovers well-meaning guests insisted you keep. If they’re on your “red-light” list, it’s time to say goodbye.

When you make over your kitchen, recognize that different members of your family may have different nutrition needs. Try to create a space where everyone will feel safe and supported.

Make Over Your Kitchen: Get Started

The first step to getting a handle on your kitchen is to choose a small area to start with, especially if you get easily overwhelmed. Since we’re talking about edibles rather than dishes and cutlery, perhaps a good place to start is the pantry. The freezer. The refrigerator. The Lazy Susan. A shelf.

Whatever you choose to overhaul, pull everything out of the designated space. Everything. Scrub the area to signal to yourself that you’re starting over. Then go through every item and keep what supports you. Toss what does not.

Although Sourdough bread is on my personal red-light list, I no longer crave anything with gluten. Therefore, I can have bread in the house for my daughter for special occasions, without being concerned about having any.

What to Look For

Sometimes looking at a pile of stuff feels overwhelming. Next week, what if you need something you just got rid of? The following suggestions are things you’ll be better off without:

Foods Past Their Expiration Dates

The first time I got my daughter to help me, she found foods that had expired five or six years earlier. Ewwww. Food labels have expiration dates for a reason; you don’t want your food to make you sick. Toss them out.

Holidays are a unique time of indulgence and overeating, but you CAN make healthy choices again.

Junk Food

We all have different definitions of what is green, yellow, or red-light food, but the following foods have no place in a healthy kitchen. The more food has been processed, the fewer nutrients it has. Remember that anything you have in your house is going to get eaten by you or a loved one unless you give it away or throw it out. These include:

Chips and Crackers
Candy and Chocolate
Sweetened drinks, including any with artificial sweeteners
Alcohol and mixers
Instant foods
Processed fats
Frozen dinners

Manufacturer Labels

Become a savvy consumer. Learn how to read food labels. If any of your remaining foods contain high fructose corn syrup, any form of sugar, hydrogenated oil, fractioned oil, or preservatives you cannot pronounce as one of the first three ingredients, get rid of it. If any foods in your “toss” bag are still edible and have any redeeming nutritional value, consider donating them to a local food pantry.

A place for everything, and everything in its place. Right before Christmas, I spent four hours doing a purge on my own pantry to support us through the holidays.

Red-Light Items

Anything that leaves you feeling sick, powerless, or craving more has no business in your kitchen. This gets tricky if you have multiple members of your household who can all eat different things. If it helps, add a label for who gets what, then stick to it, so you can be sure you’re not digging into that bag of chips at oh-dark-thirty when you know it will give you heartburn in a few hours.

Make Over Your Kitchen: How to Restock

Now that you have cleared your shelves, what can you eat? It’s time to make a list. Write down the foods from your “Green-light” list.

See if you can plan three meals’ worth first — one day — so you don’t panic.

Skewers are yummy any time of year. Such a meal allows participants to choose exactly what they want on their plate.

Next, Precision Nutrition recommends that you start by choosing any three foods from the following categories and add them to your list – fresh or frozen doesn’t matter at this point:

Vegetables
Fruits
Lean proteins
Nuts/seeds
Whole grains (oats, quinoa, wild rice, brown rice, sprouted grain bread, amaranth, etc.)

Additional Guidelines

Keep the ingredients real. Choose whole foods over processed (an apple beats apple juice or packaged applesauce any day). Single-ingredient foods when possible. The fewer ingredients the better.

Add seasonal, organic, and local food items.

Avoid foods with “health benefits” labels like “fat-free”, “low-fat,” and “good for you.” An apple doesn’t need any such artificial labels.

Gluten-free cauliflower crust pizza with peppers and chicken. All ingredients I can safely eat. Yum!

Where to Go From Here

Once you have completely restocked your kitchen with good choices, you have a few remaining responsibilities:

Enjoy the choices you’ve made
Be vigilant about shopping – don’t go grocery shopping when you are “hangry” as those foods you just tossed out might sneak back into your shopping cart
Explore new recipes, flavors, and combinations by befriending the spice drawer
Cut, dice, chop, and prepare fruits and vegetables so they truly are “ready to eat.” There’s nothing worse than setting a good intention and finding out your crisper has become a rotter.

When you bring new foods into your clean space, have a plan for using them so you don't waste any. Here are the salsa ingredients for the fermenting fan in our home. — When you bring new foods into your clean space, have a plan for using them so you don’t waste any. Here are the salsa ingredients for the fermenting fan in our home.

And remember, every day you have new choices to make. By shaping your environment — not bringing trigger foods into the car, purse, gym bag or kitchen — you help yourself make healthier choices the next time you’re hungry.

Do you have any post-holiday tips for readers? Consider commenting below. We love hearing from our readers!

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How to Journal to Determine What You Want

At the end of each year, many of us reflect on what went well and what we wish the coming year would look like. But what if we feel stuck and struggle to identify what exactly we truly desire? The journaling exercises below may help you determine what you want.

To determine what you want, think about what you are good at. A Whooper Swan in Monroe, January 2022.

Determine What You Want: Your Strengths

One place to begin is to reflect on what your skills and strengths are. This includes the realm of work and your personality traits. Precision Nutrition offers a free “Learning Skills” assessment to help you understand how you learn. For a hundred years, the Johnson O’Connor Research Foundation has offered aptitude testing. They match you with the kind of work that capitalizes on your innate abilities.

You might also access the online Strengths Finder Assessment. It is based loosely on Tom Rath’s book, Strengths Finder 2.0. Write down skills and abilities others have mentioned in work evaluations. Include skills you use in hobbies, especially anything that causes you to lose track of time.

One of my favorite responsibilities at the Woodland Park Zoo was handing out browse to guests for the Giraffe Encounter. Not only did I get to learn more about these wonderful animals from the keepers, but I also got to be part of the visitors' joyful experience. — One of my favorite responsibilities at the Woodland Park Zoo was handing out browse to guests for the Giraffe Encounter. Not only did I get to learn more about these wonderful animals from the keepers, but I also got to be part of the visitors’ joyful experience.

Prioritize Your Skills

After you have compiled a list of 12-15 strengths, prioritize them so that you can see which ones you MOST want to use during a day’s work and which ones you could get by without. I always look for ways to include writing and editing in whatever I do, whether that means taking notes as my critique group’s secretary, sending my clients summaries of our Zoom conversations, or developing weekly blog posts. I seldom use my auditory or musical abilities in work, but I do love to play the piano.

As for weaknesses, I avoid technology unless I see the end benefit of working through frustration toward mastery. Back in August, 2021 I shared my seven-year journey to starting this blog. If you perform a job where your daily tasks never get easier or leave you constantly frustrated, you won’t last in that job for long. Look at your top five strengths and list some roles, positions, or jobs that might use them. Remember, you’re not in the “editing” phase yet. You’re simply letting your creative self play.

One thing that is important to me is the natural beauty of and access to the alpine wilderness. While I grew up in Milwaukee, WI, I would not live there again as I cherish the mountains of Washington state.

Identify What You Love

The next journaling exercise is to jot down all the things you currently love to do. Your list may include “skiing,” “cooking,” “traveling,” or “getting compliments.” It could include things you are naturally good at, such as taking photographs, working with animals, or sorting and organizing.

Include things you loved as a child, teen, and young adult. If your favorite class in high school was anthropology, reflect on what intrigued you most. Was it the subject matter, the teacher, the particular book, or something else? If you felt tremendous curiosity about penguins as a kid, why? Did you ever want to be a teacher, lawyer, or doctor? What in those early thoughts still resonates with you? The more you play with this, the more you tap into your creative, artistic, and dreaming side that knows no bounds.

Mountains near Moab, UT. If you know that you want to travel, yet you find yourself in a job where you can't take time off to do so, you're not going to be happy. — Mountains near Moab, UT. If you know that you want to travel, yet you accept a job where you can’t take time off to do so, you’re not going to be happy.

Determine What You Want: Top Priorities

The third journaling exercise is more challenging. It requires examining your values and roles and determining what is most important to you in your life. These change with time. A free online resource that might help is available at Personal Values. Five of my top values came back as Health, Creativity, Acceptance, Curiosity, and Independence. When I examine my current work situation as a holistic wellness coach and author, all five of those personal values are implemented. A good match!

As you evaluate your personal values against your current job, how many fit? If there are any that are not being utilized or satisfied, you might be able to satisfy them outside of your job. You could modify your job to include what’s missing. Or you can look for work or volunteer opportunities that might satisfy more of them.

Two other top values were Family and Community. Engaging in my daughter's high school graduation was something I wouldn't have missed for anything. — Two other top values were Family and Community. Engaging in my daughter’s high school graduation was something I wouldn’t have missed for anything.

Plan Your Next Steps

Precision Nutrition’s worksheet, “From goals to actions,” may help you organize the information you’ve identified above so you can move forward in the new year. If you determine that you are in the right job but you need more personal time, ask for it. Perhaps you realize some of your strengths are being underutilized or not recognized or valued at your job. Can you find a way to bring them up so that you can use them?

Finally, if your values don’t match those of your company, or your company doesn’t value what you have to offer, it may be time to look for another job. One that uses your strengths, allows you time and freedom to do some of what you love, and matches your values and priorities.

May the coming year be the one that allows you to change your work situation so that you feel fulfilled, valued, and honored as the unique individual you are!

Featured

Release Stress: How to Use Breathwork Techniques

This week I have struggled to find my focus. Whenever that happens, I return to something very basic. Something most of us never think about it. In addition to increasing your movement during the winter months, consider exploring breathwork to release stress. Below are a few breathing techniques to try this holiday season. Consider it a new tool in your toolkit, one that is completely free and accessible to anyone.

Whenever you feel like you’ve “flipped” and need to recenter yourself, focus on your breath. Where do you feel the air coming in? Into your chest or your abdomen? Is your breathing shallow and fast, or slow and deep? Breathwork helps if you are climbing a vertical wall and your heels start to bounce up and down (a sensation known as “sewing machine leg”). But it can also help if you see red, such as when a driver swerves too close. Or when some nincompoop with fifty grocery items is in the express-only line in front of you.

Breathwork is as important as restorative sleep and good nutrition. Shown are the ingredients for fermented salsa in holiday colors.

Release Stress with Box Breathing

This stress-relieving breathing technique is taught to US Navy SEALS and is great for reducing anxiety or helping regain your center. Take a deep, slow breath in for a count of four. Hold your breath in for four counts. Then let it out to a count of four, and finally hold it out for four counts.

It’s also known as 4*4 breathing. If you were to draw it, it would resemble a box (or square). Simple! 4 counts in, hold 4, 4 counts out, hold 4. Times four. I use this at night when I need to get my mind off my to-do list and place it on something mundane and calming.

Ajax and a snow dog I built during our most recent snowfall on December 3. Playing in the snow and hiking are two activities that help me release stress.

According to Healthline, “The slow holding of breath allows CO₂ to build up in the blood. Increased blood CO₂ enhances the cardio-inhibitory response of the vagus nerve when you exhale and stimulates your parasympathetic (rest and digest) system. This produces a calm and relaxed feeling in the mind and body.”

In other words, rapid shallow breathing (aka hyperventilating) is something you do when you’re in fight-or-flight about to fend for your life, but long, slow, deep breaths are a sign that there is no tiger in the room. Try it and see how it works for you.

Sipping Breath

This is another stress-relieving breathing technique that involves deep slow breathing as though you are inhaling through a straw, holding it for several seconds, and then slowly exhaling through pursed lips. The title link has a 7-minute meditation video to follow to experience it for yourself. If watching a minute video set to mellow, soothing music makes you too anxious (or you’re so tired it might put you to sleep!), you may advance the video to minute 4.

Winnie and his "Hunny" jar, our mid-day creation from December 3, 2022. — Winnie and his “Hunny” jar, our mid-day creation from December 3, 2022.

Balloon Breath

Balloon breathing is a popular one to teach young children to get them to calm down and be centered. Place your hands on top of your head. Inhale deeply as though you are about to blow up a balloon, and raise your arms over your head as the lungs inflate fully. Having the hands overhead appears to let more air into the lungs, especially if you have been sitting at a desk or screen all day.

As you slowly exhale, bring your hands back to your head. Repeat three more times. On the last breath exhale with pursed lips to make as silly a sound as you can. Who wouldn’t feel more relaxed after acting like a kid?

Snowfall February 12-15 in 2021 was abundant. This igloo took three of us a good four hours to make but left us with great family memories.

Release Stress through Fascia Breathing

If you are interested in doing a deep dive into the importance of breathwork for your tissue health and workouts, Human Garage has a 28-Day Life Reset available for free on YouTube. When I do fascial work, I take three breaths in and out through the mouth and three breaths in and out through the nose. It feels especially helpful on torso rotation to release the tension in my lower back, or a modified pigeon to release my hips. Try it yourself and feel the difference between where the breath goes and what parts of your body reap the benefits.

The tallest snow creation we've ever made. For reference, I'm 5'6" and this guy, built on February 13, 2021, was a good eight feet tall. — The tallest snow creation we’ve ever made. For reference, I’m 5’6″ and this guy, built on February 13, 2021, was a good eight feet tall.

Candle Breath

Until doing some research earlier today, I was unaware that this was actually a name for a breathing technique. It is as you might expect: take a deep breath in, and then pretend you’re blowing out the candles on a cake. This is a great one for parents with toddlers and grade-school kids, but who’s to say kids are the only ones who can enjoy it?

Release Stress by Creating Your Own

As you explore different breathing techniques, you may notice yourself creating your own version. When I’m having trouble sleeping, I play with each of the, sometimes even combining them into something new. I recently tried a sipping breath (slow straw) with balloon breath (to the point that I think my lungs are full, then I sip in a little more which seems to help the body relax even more) and then exhale slowly, imagining a single candle in front of me in a dark room. I visualize it dancing in the flow of air until it stills, as I hold the air out. It helps to have a specific calming image in mind to shut off my worried brain.

One of our more whimsical snow creations, a Minion, was a popular one among the neighborhood dog walkers.

As always if you find these techniques helpful or you have other breathwork you care to share, please post comments in the box below. I love hearing from readers and will respond to each legitimate post.

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Conflict Creates Resilience in Writing and in Life

Writers are constantly instructed to “throw rocks at the main characters to make them suffer.” That means we provide readers with plenty of tension and conflict. We give our characters struggles, obstacles to overcome, and battles with others in order to help them grow. It’s the same in life. Conflict creates resilience.

But in February when I broke my wrist, I only saw pain and struggle. I couldn’t imagine anything positive coming from it. Now, having regained most of my strength and range of motion without needing surgery, I can see everything I’ve learned. Rehab exercises. Isometrics. Alternative movements that don’t require grip. And how long it takes someone my age, who is religious about her exercise program, to recover. The biggest lesson, however, is this: if I can face THAT, I can face anything.

A selfie I took on 2/22/22. Broken bones disrupt every routine. Conflict creates resilience. Whenever you struggle, look for the positives. How will this battle help you grow?

The Counselor

As an INFJ from the Myers Briggs Inventory, I am what they call “a counselor,” part of the rarest 2% of the general population, including only 2% of women. Brene Brown, whose copious materials on shame, guilt, and vulnerability speak volumes, happens to be an INFJ. So is cartoonist Debbie Tung, author of Everything is OK and Quiet Girl in a Noisy World. I’m relieved I’m not the only one!

I love to nurture and help people grow through my coaching company. But I also prefer avoiding conflict. That makes for some very tense internal struggles because change is almost always messy.

I've used this image before; can we maintain an attitude of gratitude and look for the GROWTH that comes from conflict and tension? — Can we maintain an attitude of gratitude and look for the GROWTH that comes from conflict and tension?

In Texas a few weeks ago, my husband and I talked about this dichotomy. I could feel myself squirming during his questioning. I prefer to listen. My tendency is to withdraw if I am unable to explain my side of things well, or if I feel like my values are being examined and come up lacking. On our drive to Corpus Christi, all I could do was sit calmly, take deep breaths, and try to contribute to the conversation without feeling attacked.

Conflict Creates Resilience; Life Without Is Not Living

Eventually, I understood what my husband was trying to say: we need conflict in order to grow. Those moments that stand out most in my mind — my wedding, my daughter’s birth, graduating from college, and becoming a climb leader — all took courage, struggle, and effort. We don’t accomplish meaningful things overnight. Also, we don’t remember moments of smooth sailing for very long. Instead, we recall the mistakes, the failures, and the big moments of tension right before we change.

Tension within ourselves provides conflict as long as the end result includes taking action. Not withdrawing, burying your head in the sand, or diving into addictive avoidance behaviors, but positive forward steps. Struggle provides the stimulus for us to take action. Without it, we can’t grow.

Can we use conflict in a positive way to truly listen to others rather than simply fighting for fighting's sake? — Can we use conflict in a positive way to truly listen to others rather than simply fighting for fighting’s sake?

Keep in mind that by “conflict” I don’t mean picking fights, being belligerent, protesting big issues, or seeking confrontation. Yes, those are examples of conflict, but to me, it feels like so much conflict these days is fighting just to fight. Instead, we could benefit from listening to opposing points of view with the goal of truly understanding others. Being open to why people feel or do what they feel or do. And understanding why we feel a need to avoid conflict.

Learned Behavior

When our daughter mentioned struggles she was having with her roommate, part of me wanted to rush in with advice. To help her avoid the pain that comes from conflict. I realized I’d been doing that for most of her life.

As hard as it is for me, it’s time to let her struggle so she can come through the other side with new coping skills. With the knowledge that she is resilient enough to figure things out for herself instead of relying on her parents. That means she may have to suffer massive discomfort, mistakes, and pain in order to change. That’s a tremendously hard lesson. But if we keep in mind the learning opportunity, it softens the pain.

This year our daughter entered a unique "Fishing Grizzly Bear" Lego sculpture at the Washington State Fair. It took five years of trying, but this year she became the Grand Master Champion. — This year our daughter entered a unique “Fishing Grizzly Bear” Lego sculpture at the Washington State Fair. It took five years of trying, but this year she became the Grand Master Champion.

Fail Big

One of my favorite motivational videos is by Denzel Washington. In this clip, he speaks to a group of students graduating from the University of Pennsylvania. His key takeaway moments are to FAIL BIG, FALL FORWARD, and KEEP TRYING.

He reminds students that Thomas Edison conducted many, many failed experiments. It only took one success, the light bulb. What sort of life are we living if we never try anything new? If we do the same thing, day in and day out, “playing it safe”?

Fall Forward

Rather than “having something to fall back on,” he suggests falling forward, flat on our faces, and often, so we can see where we’re headed. He mentions that each student in the audience has the talent to succeed; but who among us has enough guts to fail? “We don’t plan to fail, we fail to plan.” What does your plan for 2023 hold?

When you think about what you want more than anything else — whether that’s an intimate relationship, a new job, a toned body, a dream vacation, or a successful climb — what is holding you back? What stands in your way? Can you take the first bold, courageous step toward it today? What struggles do you have to face to get it?

Mushrooms dusted with early December snowfall.

Keep Trying

Washington’s last point in the video is to keep trying. Says Otto Kroeger, in Type Talk at Work, “INFJs’ nonstop search for learning, self-growth, and development—and wishing the same for everyone else—makes them very reassuring to others and people worth emulating.” My sincere wish for readers facing struggle is that if at first, you don’t succeed, find something else to try. As long as you are alive, you will continue to face struggle. But you also have tons of things left to try in this lifetime.

Pull out that wish list you have tucked in a drawer somewhere. Use the tools from within this blog to create SMART goals, take five-minute actions, and figure out what today’s one thing will be. Draw from the resilience of others who have found a way through. Conflict creates resilience. See what new lesson you can get from the difficult struggles ahead. Never give up.

Tension and conflict exist in real life just as in fiction. When you get a clenched stomach, pumping heart, and racing mind, take three deep breaths to get your rational brain to stay online. Don't "flip" and go lizard-brain (i.e. fight of flight). — When you get a clenched jaw, butterflies in your stomach, a pumping heart, and racing thoughts take three deep breaths. Don’t “flip” and go lizard-brain (i.e. fight or flight). Take the next step. Trust that you will get through. You got this.

As always, if you are facing some sort of conflict and you need a sounding board, I’m here to help. Post your issue in the comments or send me a personal message. Please do not struggle alone!

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What Do Your To-Read Books Reveal About You?

Today as the snow fell in Seattle for the first time this winter, I looked at my pile of to-read books. I thought about what might be on other people’s lists. In online interviews, many published authors say they’re reading author memoirs for inspiration. Or maybe the classics (yawn…) Friends who aren’t writers usually say they’re reading popular bestsellers. Those who aspire to be published often share that they’re reading books in their genre. My “to-read” pile of books reveals a lot about what I’m currently focused on. What does your pile reveal about you?

My daughter's foray into quilling. This handmade card for my parents inspires me to go beyond my current boundaries into the wild unknown. Along with the books below, I have three quilling books begging to be picked up and used. — My daughter’s foray into quilling. This handmade card for my parents inspires me to go beyond my current boundaries into the wild unknown. Along with the books below, I have three quilling books begging to be picked up and used.

To-Read Books About Changing the Mind

In December, I often look back at what I accomplished in the previous eleven months. I start thinking about changes I might make in the coming year. In my current short stack of eight books, a whopping seven are self-help books. The first four have to do with changing the mind.

Debbie Tung: Everything Is OK

I just completed Debbie Tung's graphic memoir, Everything Is OK. What a relief! — I just completed Debbie Tung’s graphic memoir, Everything Is OK. What a relief!

Tung’s graphic memoir is a collection of comics about overcoming anxiety and depression. If you are looking for a quick, inspiring read to help you through the long, cold, dark winter months, this one is perfect. Whether you experience SAD or general angst around the holidays, you are not alone, even if it feels like you are.

Her number one piece of advice for getting through dark, overwhelming thoughts (p. 166), is “To make small changes in your life and dedicate more time to work on things that matter to you.” For me, that includes keeping up with my weekly blog. It acts as an anchor when everything else feels like it’s spiraling out of control. It helps me recognize those thoughts that are keeping me stuck while inspiring others to do so as well.

Tama Kieves Books

Tama Kieves' Thriving Through Uncertainty. — Tama Kieves’ Thriving Through Uncertainty.

Tama Kieves' Inspired & Unstoppable. — Tama Kieves’ Inspired & Unstoppable.

I first came across Tama Kieves in January 2022 during a journaling seminar through the IAJW. She so inspired me with her delivery that I reserved several of her books from the library. As soon as I came across “Doing one thing” and “Keeping it simple, stupid,” ideas I shared in my blog last year, I knew I had found a kindred spirit.

I read a page a day from A Year Without Fear, a book that shares daily 5-minute inspirations. Thriving Through Uncertainty provides helpful jump-starts, thought questions, and exercises. I pull it out when I have time to reflect on how I might change faulty messages I’m sending myself. Inspired and Unstoppable supplies wisdom when I most need it, including her opening line: What if everything you thought you needed to do to succeed was actually standing in the way of your success?

Pam Grout: A Course In Miracles Experiment

The Course In Miracles Experiment, by Pam Grout. Hopefully, this will be more accessible than the extremely dense, overly religious, and intimidating original, A Course in Miracles.

Kieves, a life and work coach, combines wisdom from her self-help books with tips for the layperson from A Course In Miracles. I recently joined one of her online groups. She repeatedly said that we either act out of love or fear, and we have complete control over which we choose. I recently added Grout’s “Cliff notes” version of the dense program, A Course In Miracles, to explore more deeply in the coming months.

All four of these books reveal to me that I rely on motivational messages to move forward. Since I am a visual learner, I prefer books in written format. However, I have been listening to audiobooks in the car. Such books reveal that “When the student is ready, the teacher appears.”

Books about Self-Acceptance

The next three self-help titles on my reread list deal with self-acceptance and self-understanding. I own all three, but I find I have to keep reviewing the material to get it to fully sink in. I often joke that I move at glacial speed, pondering and musing until suddenly, one day, it sinks in and I push forward like there’s no stopping me. How do you move forward?

Brene Brown: Gifts of Imperfection

Ever since I heard Brown’s Houston Ted talk, I’ve been a huge fan of hers. I’m currently listening to her audiobook, The Power of Vulnerability, for the second time. Her message in this book, letting go of who you think you’re supposed to be (there’s that dreaded word, should!) and embracing who you are, overlaps beautifully with the next book.

Self-Compassion, Kristin Neff

Neff is another Ted Talk inspiration. I’ve recommended her book more often than any other, except perhaps Dan Sullivan’s Gap and the Gain. The message that stands out is using the same empathetic and compassionate techniques you would with a best friend, on yourself. She also insists that everyone suffers; everyone has pain — it’s a necessary part of being human. But we must not beat ourselves up over mistakes and hardship; we can recognize we’re struggling and still move forward with grace and compassion. Of all the books on my list to read, this one has been the hardest for me to tackle.

As I write this post, I recognize it’s probably the one I need to study most of all. In books I own, sometimes I make notes in the margins. Exactly a year ago, I finished the first chapter. Armed with that knowledge, I am moving it onto my “High priority reading list.”

The Emotional Life of Your Brain: Richard Davidson

Of all the books in my pile, this one is the most scientific and newest acquisition. In 30 years of research, neuroscientist Davidson discovered that we each have an “emotional style.” Chapter 3 has a quiz to assess it.

Our emotional style consists of resilience, outlook, social intuition, self-awareness, sensitivity to context, and attention. Our pattern constitutes our “emotional fingerprint.” I’m eager to learn more about mine and what it says about how I relate to others. He also has a chapter titled “Plastic Brain.”

To-Read Books: Survival Fiction, including Falcon Wild

To-read books: I'm currently reading Falcon Wild by Terry Lynn Johnson. — To-read books: I’m currently reading Falcon Wild by Terry Lynn Johnson.

Finally, we reach my favorite escape category, fiction. I have been racing through middle-grade survival stories, where youngsters find themselves in the middle of the wilderness and have to survive (NOT surviving middle school itself. Those are ubiquitous!)

I have a particular fondness for books for 10 to 14-year-old readers. I have been working on several, myself, for a number of years. Some of my favorite authors in the genre include:

Gary Paulsen — his famous novel, Hatchet, the first in a series of four, was a Newbery Honor-winning Young Adult book from 1986. Sadly, Paulsen died of cardiac arrest in October 2021
Dusti Bowling — she writes desert survival stories including The Canyon’s Edge, Across the Desert, and 24 Hours in Nowhere. I’m thrilled to hear that her latest book, Dust, comes out in 2023.

Terry Lynn Johnson — the book I am currently reading is Falcon Wild. She’s also written a dogsledding series and a Survivor Diaries series. If an author combines birds, survival, and clean reading about pre-teen protagonists, I will read it.

Our first snowfall of the 2022-2023 season.

Takeaways From Examining My To-Read Pile

Before I close, I should point out that I get zero commission from referring to any of these books. If you find them interesting, check them out at the local library, put them on your wishlist, or offer them as holiday gifts to those who might benefit.

My takeaways from examining my to-read pile are that I am:

Curious about how the brain works, in particular, whether neuroplasticity applies to the emotional life of our brain.
Interested in finding accountability, support, and encouragement around books that have been difficult to work through on my own.
Ready, willing, and able to make significant changes now that I’ve been developing a growth mindset.
Eager to change those thoughts that keep me stuck.

How about you? What takeaways have you discovered around your reading list? If you have insights or suggestions for further blog posts about getting unstuck, please share them in the comments. And if you have additional resources that fit the takeaways above I’d love to hear about them. Joyward!

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How to Play Your Way to Gratitude

As we approach the holidays, I have determined that I need more play, more often. How about you? When was the last time you laughed so hard that your face hurt? Have you done anything recently just for fun? Do you play games that engage and thrill you? This holiday season, I encourage you to think about what you have enjoyed doing in the past and see if you can play your way to gratitude.

One way to gratitude is to pay attention to your surroundings and note what catches your eye. I loved the colorful deep pastel colors of these oversized chairs on South Padre Island. This blog shares other "playful" photographs as an example of how the camera can help YOU detect what constitutes play. — One way to gratitude is to pay attention to your surroundings and note what catches your eye. I loved the colorful deep pastel colors of these oversized chairs on South Padre Island. This blog shares other “playful” photographs as an example of how the camera can help YOU detect what constitutes play.

Vacation Objectives in South Texas

My husband and I just returned from a play vacation. We spent three days with friends in Humble, TX, walking, talking, enjoying great food, exploring local parks, and playing card games and Yahtzee. Then we headed south toward the Rio Grande to birdwatch for four days.

In my most recent blog post, I shared five goals for our trip, all of which we accomplished. I focus herein on the last goal, embracing tiny moments of joy.

A deer enjoyed snacking on vegetation at Atascosita Park in Humble, Texas. We played on the huge climbing structure, walked around the urban ponds, and got pictures of the local wildlife.

Way to Gratitude: Embrace Tiny Moments of Joy

Cesare Pevase said, “We do not remember days, we remember moments.” The tiny moments that I capture with my camera remind me of where we visited, what happened, and what sparks joy for me. Two other trips we took this year also sparked joy. They included one of my all-time favorite hikes in Moab’s Fiery Furnace, and to Alaska with our daughter. Photos highlight what matters most to us, what we want to capture, savor, and share.

During our visit to the Bentsen-Rio Grande Valley State Park, I took twenty minutes to explore a trail by myself. By getting away from hawk watchers, I felt myself shifting gears. I saw more. I got curious. What did the spikey-looking Spanish moss feel like? How — and why — did those snails get into the trees? And what made all that noise? (Turns out the chicken-like chachalacas make quite a ruckus!) Breaking away allowed me to find my own path toward joy.

Peccary piglets (2 of the 3 we spotted) at Hazel Bazemore park.

TRY THIS: The next time you go for a walk, try reversing your path or exploring a new-to-you park, hike, or series of streets. Open your senses. What catches your gaze? Do you hear anything you’ve never heard before? What textures draw you to explore? What you notice informs you about what matters to you. Pay attention. Learn. Grow. Play.

A colorful, whimsical lawn ornament that caught my eye in Humble, TX.

Way to Gratitude: My Top Trip Stops

To remember the highlights, I made a list of the nature preserves, birding centers, pullouts, and state parks we visited. All fifteen of them. Below are the four that supplied me with the strongest joyful moments (in the order we visited them.)

South Padre Island Birding and Nature Center

Our first major stop on the way toward the Rio Grande was the South Padre Island Birding and Nature Center. It was also the first time we saw many of the birds we would enjoy for four days. I was struck by the diversity of species since this center has both freshwater and saltwater ecosystems. While my husband was taken by the smooth-billed and groove-billed anis, I focused on the colorful herons, roseate spoonbills, and four massive American alligators.

Estero Llano Grande State Park

This park is six miles north of the Mexican border. During the five hours we visited, we saw 57 different bird species, including green kingfishers, olive sparrows, and a pair of pauraques which weren’t even on our target list. Bonus! Over the span of eight days, I added 47 new-to-me ebird species, moving my life list up to 611 species. For reference, there are estimated to be over 10,000 bird species worldwide and over 500 which can be seen in the state of Washington.

Laguna Atascosa National Wildlife Refuge

The refuge, at close to 100,000 acres, is the largest protected area of natural habitat left in the Lower Rio Grande Valley. We added several new birds to our life list including eastern meadowlarks, white-tailed, and red-shouldered hawks, and were wowed by the many thousands of birds out on the lake despite high winds and cold temperatures.

Perhaps my favorite, most colorful bird photo of the whole trip was of this northern cardinal male.

Hazel Bazemore Park

This lovely 78-acre nature preserve lies near Corpus Christi, noteworthy for its annual hawk watch. It was my personal favorite because we saw peccaries (nine, including 3 baby javelinas!), deer, and a bobcat. The only other big cat sighting I’ve had in the wild was also a bobcat, in North Carolina. Big cats are secretive, solitary, elusive, and seldom caught on film — but this time I got lucky!

A wild bobcat with breakfast in its mouth, at Hazel Bazemore County Park. The only other big cat I've seen in the wild is a bobcat in North Carolina. They are secretive, elusive, and seldom caught on film -- at least not mine! — A wild bobcat with breakfast in its mouth, at Hazel Bazemore County Park.

Defining Play for You

In her CD, The Power of Vulnerability, shame researcher Brene Brown says that play lies at the core of creativity and innovation. It’s anything that makes us lose track of time and self-consciousness, creating the space where ideas are born. This means we should not restrict play to vacations.

I’m listening. For me, playing includes rolling in a pile of leaves in the backyard with my daughter and dog. Ordering a book of card games for 3-4 people so we always have ready-made non-screen entertainment we can engage in together. Choosing a tree and decorating it as a family. Finding new recipes to experiment with in the kitchen.

The author and Ajax play in a huge pile of dry leaves.

TRY THIS: How do you define play? Think about moments in your past that have brought you joy. Think of what you loved as a child, or what you did last week that made you laugh out loud. What moments of play spark joy for you? Can you include more of it in your daily life? What would it take to set aside a few minutes to watch birds out your window? Can you save twenty minutes to go for a walk and focus on what intrigues you? How about an hour to visit a museum or art shop you haven’t visited in a long time? My wish for you this holiday season includes more play, fun, and joy.

Don't be a turkey! Have some fun this holiday season! Play! — Don’t be a turkey! Have some fun this holiday season! Play!

I welcome your comments, thoughts, or observations in the comments box. Happy holidays and spark (or sparkle!) on.

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Seize the Moment and Ditch the Old To-Do List

I am in the midst of preparing for a week-long birding trip with my husband. This will be the first together without our daughter in eighteen years. This morning my long “to-do” list closed in on me. I thought back to the last four days of our Alaska vacation in which “winging it” brought about some of our most memorable experiences. Here I was, facing a beautiful cloud-free November day, with a good half-day of “to-do’s.” Did they really matter? Could I seize the moment and ditch the old to-do list?

Seize the moment. On a morning walk, we spotted brilliant fall colors blazing against bright blue skies in Seattle. What's not to love? If only we make time to enjoy them. — Seize the moment. On a morning walk, we spotted brilliant fall colors blazing against bright blue skies in Seattle. What’s not to love? If only we make time to enjoy them.

Three Wins

On a whimsical walk with my dog, in a neighborhood I used to live in but seldom visit, I pondered Dan Sullivan’s advice in The Gap and the Gain. He talks about reflecting on “three wins” at the end of each day and projecting possible wins for the following day. Instead of tackling that intimidating to-do list, what if I rewrote today’s wins as:

Providing myself with massive self-care
Spending time outside with my dog
Packing for my morning flight

Would the world really collapse if I didn’t get another blog post out?

A beautiful deep-yellow tree caught my eye against the clear blue sky.

Seize the Moment: Simple and Good Enough

Of course not. I write on deadline for myself, to prove I can. But the question was enough to get me thinking about the broader scope of my blog. Of the lessons I return to repeatedly. Like the five-minute action in Keeping it Simple and Good Enough. What if I reminded readers of some of the tools we all can use whenever we get overwhelmed? When we all feel invisible pressure to “do everything, and do it perfectly?”

The longer I walked, the more I realized that I yearned to write something big, stupendous, and amazing. But my inner voice kept whispering KISAGE. Could I write about listening to our inner wisdom? What was my spirit asking for heading into this trip? What might my three wins be for the coming week?

I looked up and spotted a peek-a-boo treehouse. Then I smiled. I had the answer.

I spotted this gorgeous treehouse and created a story about the users. Did someone build it as a writer's retreat? for kids' sleepovers? for bird watching? — I spotted this gorgeous treehouse and created a story about the users. Did someone build it as a writer’s retreat? for kids’ sleepovers? for bird watching?

Listen to Your Spirit

If I had to put my recent thoughts to a musical score, I’d set it to Hans Zimmer’s Time (from Inception). I’ve been playing it on repeat over the last two weeks. Zimmer’s music inspires me so much that I recently acquired sheet music. I’ve been setting aside fifteen minutes a day to practice it on the piano. I wish I could create something as awe-inspiring as his music. But I am also struck by the clean simplicity of the closing bars.

My post this week is equally simple. It is a reminder to listen to your inner wisdom, what Tama Kieves calls our “spirit” in her weekly course. In it, she combines her book, Inspired and Unstoppable, with wisdom from A Course In Miracles. When we take time to trust ourselves, give ourselves massive self-care, and listen to the wisdom within, we can find our way out of any maze.

The whimsy of a turtle statuette on a bench next to a pumpkin.

Seize the Moment: A Different To-Do List

So, I scrapped my to-do list and simplified it. Doing so made room for creating a short blog post. And what about my goals for the coming trip? I created them while sitting outside barefoot in the November sunshine.

Simple:

Get plenty of sleep
Be gracious and respectful
Ask open-ended questions
Seek tiny moments of joy
Re-connect with my husband

The raspberry colors of this maple stand out among the green, yellow and orange around it. — The raspberry colors of this maple stand out among the green, yellow, and orange around it.

What has you stuck? What matters most? Is your ladder leaning against the right wall? Can you rewrite your list with five-minute actions in mind? At the end of the day, as you look back at what you accomplished, do you feel good about your priorities? I do. Prioritizing self-care allowed me to finish what’s most important.

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How to Reduce Emotional Clutter by Cleaning House

You may recall from an earlier post that I developed my own monthly challenge called OcTraPiMo (October Trash Pick-up Month). The experiment was to collect trash on daily neighborhood walks with my dog. This year, I’m hoping to reduce emotional clutter by cleaning the house.

An adorable but worried-looking northern fur seal during our most recent trip to New Zealand in December 2019. How I sometimes envy the freedom wild animals have who don't need to reduce emotional clutter. They have no houses to clean. — An adorable but worried-looking northern fur seal during our most recent trip to NZ in December 2019. How I sometimes envy the freedom wild animals have who don’t need to reduce emotional clutter. They have no houses to clean.

What Is Clutter?

Anything in your home that you love, need, or use, is not clutter. Everything else is and needs to go. Emotional clutter, however, is way more complicated. And has much deeper roots. If you’re anything like me, every time you think of removing precious stuff from your home, you may feel a host of emotions ranging from uncertainty to panic.

“I just know as soon as I get rid of it, I’ll need it.” Not sure what this is called, maybe unreasonable anticipation?

“Nobody notices that crack in the frame except me.” This is a lie we tell ourselves to hide the truth.

“You can never have too many dog toys.” This one needs no analysis. Or maybe it does. Just sayin’.

Ajax rests next to one of his two baskets of dog toys. A dog can only play with one at a time. Time to clutter bust, perhaps?

“My grandmother gave that to me right before she died. I can’t just throw it out.” Emotional attachment to someone who is no longer there, feeling like the object somehow represents the missing person.

“I wear that every other December when we host for the holidays. It’s getting snug.” Um, perhaps unrealistic expectations.

There must be psychological names for such examples, but that does not matter. Can you recognize yourself in any of them?

How can we bust through the clutter in our home when the thought of letting go of anything causes emotional turmoil? The answer may lie in unearthing the reason for the clutter and removing its tough outer shell.

From Clutter to Clarity

One place to start might be Kerri Richardson‘s book, From Clutter to Clarity. Of all the resources I’ve studied, including Marie Kondo’s wildly popular KonMari method, Richardson gets at why we have clutter where we do. Her “common clutter hotspots” cheat sheet at the end of the book pointed me toward two chapters that spoke volumes.

I didn’t realize (until this week) that I have two clutter hotspots: our office (what Richardson refers to as the money center) and my mind. Once I identified the truths in those two chapters, I was able to shed grief, guilt, and shame before I could tackle the KonMari method. Now that I have embraced the why behind the clutter accumulation and have created a strong plan to deal with it, I can move forward with the how.

An adult white-capped albatross we spotted during a pelagic trip off Stewart Island on January 1, 2020. With a beak like that it would be easy to peck through any shells.

Choosing a Path to Reduce Emotional Clutter

Brooks Palmer, author of Clutter Busting and Clutter Busting Your Life, offers some practical advice for getting rid of clutter. He stresses the importance of asking yourself curious questions about the items in your home. Questions such as how do you feel when you read/hold/see this item? Does it represent someone you no longer feel you are or something you want to change? Who pays the highest price for holding onto the item beyond its welcome?

If the answer is you then it’s time to let go.

Marie Kondo, Japanese consultant and creator of The KonMari Method, suggests that items in your home which don’t “spark joy” do not belong in your home. She asks participants to commit to tidying everything all at once, whereas KC Davis, author of How to Keep House While Drowning, insists that you are not lazy if you struggle to keep a clean house and you can take as long as you need to.

When considering the right path for you, remember that whatever system you choose must work for you or you won’t follow through. Perhaps you could use a five-minute action to get over any inertia. This is my plan.

A northern right whale breached nearby on January 1, 2020, during a pelagic trip off Stewart Island, NZ. This image speaks to me of "diving right in" to reduce emotional clutter. No better time than the present. — A northern right whale breached nearby on January 1, 2020, during a pelagic trip off Stewart Island, NZ. This image speaks to me of “diving right in” to reduce emotional clutter. No better time than the present.

KonMari Method

Kondo suggests a clutter-busting method that includes going through everything in your house, garage, shed, and car(s) in five steps, in the following order:

Clothing
Books
Papers
Miscellaneous items
Sentimental value

She suggests pooling together similar items so you can see everything you have, all at once. As you go through each pile (you can have each member of your household do their own clothes, books, and papers), ask “Does this spark joy?” Keep anything you love or that makes you happy. Put the rest into “Maybe” or “Discard.”

You might also want to consider whether items in the discard pile should end up in the garbage, in a garage sale, as a donation, or to trade. But initially, your priority is to look for what you will keep.

And don’t overlook the option of starting small: your desk. A drawer in your file cabinet. A shelf behind your desk. If doing the entire household all at once stresses you out, commit to what you CAN do to move forward.

A northern right whale starting on a deep dive. If going deep stops you in your tracks, do your best to find out why. Then just start. Even if it's five minutes a day. You are so worth it. — A northern right whale starting on a deep dive. If going deep stops you in your tracks, do your best to find out why. Then just start. Even if it’s five minutes a day. You are so worth it.

NoCluHoMo to Reduce Emotional Clutter

During the coming months (until I finish – doing this during the holidays is a little intimidating but I’m using the five-minute action as my guide) I’m conducting an experiment I’ve dubbed NoCluHoMo (No Clutter in the House Months). I have done well with clothing and books. Where I get stuck is Kondo’s third category, papers.

In particular, my manuscripts. I always mean well, but whenever I get to this category, I want to skip over it, something Kondo would advise against. All the other clutter-busting authors would probably say, “Just keep going.” So that’s what I plan to do.

Jigsaw puzzles I acquired by trading those I no longer wanted for those I could enjoy. Put together your own solution, one piece at a time.

If you feel like clutter-busting would help you clear your emotional clutter, and you’ve found a path that works for you, consider joining me during NoCluHoMo. It doesn’t have to be in November, it can be whenever it works for you. After all, give yourself a present — there’s no better time than the present. As always, feel free to share comments that might help others get past their blocks. I love hearing from readers.

Featured

How To Create Your Unique Food List

Imagine walking into the supermarket after a hard day at work. You’re borderline hangry, and you want food. Now. At times like this, it’s easy to grab the first thing you find and stuff it in your face. You’ll deal with the consequences later. But if you know in advance what’s on your unique food list, you can make much better decisions that support your health and well-being.

Just as pandas are highly specialized to do very well on bamboo, we have each evolved to do well on certain foods. What is on your traffic light green list?

Unique Food List: Traffic Light Method

In June, I shared a blog post, How to eat is more important than what to eat. You can use the “traffic light” eating method to create your own personal power-food list of what to eat. Precision Nutrition coaches use this technique to help people identify foods that provide energy, help improve sleep, and support balanced moods.

Grab a pen and paper and jot down your thoughts as you read the following questions.

For families with "traffic light" lists that don't overlap on many items, restaurants can be amazing solutions as each person can order what they want. — For families with “traffic light” lists that don’t overlap on many items, restaurants can be amazing solutions as each person can order what they want.

Green-Light Foods: What Makes You Feel Awesome?

Green-light foods make you feel good nearly every time you eat them—physically and emotionally.

You digest them well, you like the taste, and you have a healthy relationship with them. (Read: You can count on them for regular nourishment; you’re not just calling them up when you’re emotionally challenged.)

These differ widely from person to person. My husband loves steak and Jasmine rice while I prefer pork and baby gold potatoes. And my daughter (bless her youth) can still eat gluten without problems.

By knowing what's on your unique food list you can customize salads so that they are delicious, nutritious, and health-supportive for you. — By knowing what’s on your unique food list you can customize salads so that they are delicious, nutritious, and health-supportive for you.

I work with a couple who have similar hiking and skiing objectives, but one swears by liver pate while the other must consume carbohydrates. Yes, cooking for each individual’s diet needs in a large family can be tricky. But start by looking for where your traffic light lists overlap. Maybe you can find foods everyone can enjoy — and feel good eating.

Yellow-Light Foods: What Foods Work — Sometimes?

You might like these foods, but when you eat them regularly or in larger portions, you don’t feel too great. For example, a small portion of lentils may be fine, but a big bowl makes you blame the dog for the sudden odor in the room.

Alcohol and organic chips could wind up in this category, but so could kale or tomatoes.

Homemade cheese bowls -- for those who can't eat gluten or deep-fried foods. — Homemade cheese bowls — for those who can’t eat gluten or deep-fried foods.

What’s more, these can change frequently. For months my husband was eating fermented foods (to my daughter’s dismay) and then realized something had changed. He shifted to adding tomato sauce or hot sauce for flavoring. I find that raw tomatoes sometimes give me cold sores, but cooking tomatoes in a gluten-free lasagna is fine.

Red-Light Foods: What Makes You Hide After Eating Them?

There is no “bad food” per se, but red-light foods sure can make you feel bad. They might cause allergic reactions or indigestion. They could contribute to diarrhea, constipation, or bloat. Certain foods might make you feel like you’ve gained fifteen pounds overnight. Or perhaps they make you feel like you’ve lost all control.

Ultra-processed foods fall into this category. Most people find that, once they start eating them, they can’t stop. These include doughnuts, cookies, chips, crackers, sugary cereals, and even some granola bars. Packed with sugar, fillers, sodium, and chemicals, they have been manufactured to make people buy more. Cha-ching!

I know that if I eat the concoction above I will have zero nourishment and 100% mood swings, not anything I want to do to my body.

So-called “healthy” foods can also be on a person’s red-light list. For example, if you have a reaction to shellfish, they’re red. If you experience diarrhea after having yogurt or milk, dairy foods may be red-light foods for you. I have found that I get congested and sniffly anytime I have the smallest amount of gluten.

While I do not have celiac disease (meaning I won’t die from gluten), my sensitivity means anything containing gluten is red. Once you’ve identified how to live a healthy lifestyle, you won’t want to go back to constant congestion.

Your Unique Food List Is Yours Alone

Consider how certain foods make you feel and think about yourself:

Does this food feel good in my body?
Do I get energy or feel sluggish after eating this food?
Does this food align with my culture and values, if that’s important to me?
Do I like how I behave when I’m around these foods?
Do I feel guilty about eating something?

My unique food list no longer includes cauliflower (bloat), but now I do well with red meat (yay protein and iron). Our list of optimal foods changes as we change.

When you choose foods that are from your green list, with a little yellow (think 10% “cheat meals” during a week, or two weekly meals), and avoid the red, you’ll probably find yourself eating much healthier. But more importantly, you’ll feel a greater sense of autonomy, flexibility, and enjoyment when you eat.

How have your food preferences changed over time? Do you have challenges in your household finding foods everyone can agree on? Leave a question or comment for me. I love hearing from readers.

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Asking Good Questions on the Trail to Melakwa Lake

This week provided me with an overwhelming range of blog topics. Smoky Seattle skies, even as we’re nearing November. Our company’s upcoming launch of a reimagined website. A return to training in-person clients. And discovering that dropping our daughter off at college the fourth time hurt more than the first. Wanting to keep a positive vibe in my blog, I decided to share a fun discovery from a recent hike to Melakwa Lake: the power of asking good questions.

Maple leaves in full fall color as my hiking partner and I traded off asking good questions on the trail to Melakwa Lake.

Where Is the Clean Air?

If you have been following my blog, you may recall questions I asked myself on a recent autumn hike to Granite Mountain. This time, one of my most important questions came to me the night before: where can I find clean air? It was hard to do this month, as the Pacific Northwest has been hit hard by some of the worst smoke yet, thanks to wildfires in the mountains and zero rain. I’d perused the AirNow.gov website for possible shifts in the winds, and we decided to go east of Snoqualmie.

As I approached milepost 35 on I-90, I could hardly make out the mountain ridge above. No way can we hike in this! However, once we pulled into the Denny Creek campground twelve miles beyond, my mood improved. Blue skies. No haze. No smoky stench. Mission accomplished. My soul sang. We’d finally get to hike again!

Ajax and I enjoyed Franklin Falls, a warm-up walk before our target hike. We picked up ten doggie bags and other trash items, reminiscent of 2021's OcTraPiMo, leaving the trail cleaner than we found it. — Ajax and I enjoyed Franklin Falls, a warm-up walk before our target hike. We picked up ten doggie bags and other trash items, reminiscent of 2021’s OcTraPiMo, leaving the trail cleaner than we found it.

What Makes for Good Questions?

As Ajax, my buddy, and I started up the trail, I eagerly anticipated the deep philosophical exchange that usually develops from our conversations. Later, in my never-ending quest to improve my communication skills, I tried to figure out what helps us have such great discussions. We have a knack for picking up right where we left off. In this case, our last hike together was four months ago. We also care deeply about each other. But perhaps it boils down to asking thought-provoking questions.

What are some of the qualities of good questions? Not only are they short, concise, and descriptive — and asked one at a time — but they also advance a conversation. They help you:

Avoid confusion
Provide additional information and clarification
Get the conversation flowing
Allow you to express your curiosity
Explore new directions

Smiles all around, in front of blazing red maple leaves.

Tips for Asking Good Questions

Bobby Powers provides tips about how to phrase a question on Medium.com. My favorites are:

Ask What and How, not Why

“Why” questions tend to put people on the defensive and make them feel like they’re being grilled. “What” and “how” are more objective and neutral. “Why didn’t you do your homework?” is not a question any student wants to hear. Or answer. But “How much time have you spent on your homework?” or “What kind of assignments did your teachers give you this week?” may start a much more interesting — and engaging — conversation.

Upper Melakwa Lake with its crystal-clear blue sky, around noon on 10/18/22.

Embrace the Pause

“Silence is the noise thinking makes,” offers Powers. Sometimes when the conversation runs out, I wrack my brain trying to come up with the next topic. During this hike, I let silence come and go, and was pleasantly surprised when my buddy came up with some fascinating things to talk about. And questions of her own. By allowing for pauses and processing time, our conversations go even deeper. And if we happen to expose a raw nerve, then we both realize there’s plenty more to discuss, but we take a gentler approach. Win!

Ask Open-ended Questions

Ask open-ended questions that require more than a “yes,” “no,” “maybe” or “I don’t know” reply. In the world of work, “Do you want a new job?” won’t lead very far. Instead, “What sort of responsibilities are you looking for?” or “How would you like to spend your day at work?” provides room for rich discussion — and may not require a change of job after all.

Ajax agrees that we had near-perfect conditions on the hike up to Melakwa Lake on October 18, 2022.

Descending into the Smoke

We had both lakes entirely to ourselves. Unless you count the pair of chipmunks that made Ajax drool for fifteen minutes. As we made our way from Upper to Lower lake, a light breeze stirred, providing us with pleasant relief on an unseasonably warm October day. The levels of both rich emerald-green lakes were lower than usual, and the log jam we crossed to access Lower Lake was bone dry. The Cascade Mountains desperately need rain!

As we descended from Hemlock Pass, we caught our first whiff of smoke. It grew progressively worse, until the haze surrounded us. The breezes must have caused the smoke from fires to the west of us, on the ridge above Snoqualmie, to fill the valley. While we were never in danger, the air quality went from good to unhealthy within hours. Instead of pausing to soak our feet at the Denny Creek Water Slide, we continued directly to the car.

One last photo of colorful maples and a blue sky. In the right of the picture is the start of a smog layer that filled the valley and dried out our throats. But it was worth it.

Take-Away: Quality First

My biggest takeaway from this hike, besides gratitude for the hours of clean air, is about appreciating the quality of good questions. It’s important to ask questions the right way because the multiverse will try to answer you. If you ask, “Why can’t I get this?” you’ll find the answer in the form of an excuse. If, instead, you ask, “What can I learn from this experience?” or “What might I try differently next time?” the answer will be much more instructive.

What is your experience with questions? How might you rephrase questions in the future to be more productive, more loving, and more supportive? Share in the Blog comments. We love to hear from readers.

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How to Rewrite the Past for a Better Future

This week I’ve been reflecting on what 2022 means to me. This year marks two significant milestones: the thirty-year anniversary of completing my graduate degree at UW, and ten-year anniversary of Emily Day (our first family dog). But such thoughts conjure loss and sadness. Could I find a way to rewrite the past for a better future?

Emily on June 28, 2012. Her health had taken a nose dive at age 12.5 and we knew we had to say goodbye. We spent the morning of "Emily Day" celebrating her life by taking her on a car ride, providing her steak for lunch, and doling out huge dollops of love. — Emily on June 28, 2012. Her health had taken a nose dive at age 12.5 and we knew we had to say goodbye. We spent the morning of “Emily Day” celebrating her life by taking her on a car ride, providing her steak for lunch, and doling out huge dollops of love.

Finishing Graduate School, Joining Mountaineers

When I moved to Seattle in the fall of 1990, I had two large goals: to climb Mt. Rainier and to get a graduate degree from UW. I completed the first in May 1991 and the second in June 1992. To me, finishing school marked the end of a long but familiar chapter of my life. I knew how to be a student. But supporting myself seemed intimidating. While I figured out my next steps, I joined the Mountaineers in October 1992.

Flash forward thirty years. This week, I wrote a personal essay for the Mountaineers Magazine celebrating three decades of membership. I got to thinking: What if I reframed 1992 as the start of my life of outdoor adventure, something that carries energy and positivity?

A visit to UW Campus in March 2022, celebrating the cherry blossoms. The "prospective students information day" for my daughter couldn't have been timed any better. — A visit to UW Campus in March 2022, celebrating the cherry blossoms. The “prospective students information day” for my daughter couldn’t have been timed any better.

In my essay, I outlined how The Mountaineers has impacted me. It provides social connections, recreational fun, and adventures around the globe. I also find professional opportunities for writing, teaching, and coaching, and a way to enrich my family’s life. Reframing that year as a beginning, not an end, carries more power. Rewritten, 1992 was the year I committed to following my bliss and connecting with the natural world.

Rewrite the Past: Goodbye to a Pet, Hello to a Passion

Likewise, for a decade I’ve been remembering 2012 as the year Emily died. It took three years before we considered getting another dog. In August 2012, I received a postcard about Write on the Sound (WOTS), a small conference in Edmonds. I needed something to help me get over my grief and move forward again. Maybe formally studying the craft of writing could help.

I attended three full days of workshops and classes, grieving and crying between them. Two sessions stood out. One was about writing picture books for kids; the other was about dream interpretation. Both had a profound impact on me and have shaped me into the writer I am today.

Our daughter says her last goodbye to Emily before heading into the Zoo for summer day camp.

Flash forward ten years. Last weekend marked a decade of attending WOTS. For the past four, I’ve helped run the conference as a member of the steering committee. In 2012, I never could have imagined standing here today: a member of two writers’ critique groups, a blog writer, and a conference co-host, teaching others how to find their unique voices and get unstuck. Could I reframe 2012 as the start of a glorious, challenging return to the world of writing?

Rewrite the Past: Surprising Writing Tips

Of all the wonderful sessions at last weekend’s conference, Shawn Wong, the Sunday plenary speaker, surprised me the most. A teacher at UW for 38 years, Wong moved the Zoom audience to tears with his stories about working with military vets through the Red Badge project. His advice to writers was threefold:

Write the truth, not just the facts
You can’t change the past, but you can change the message of the event
Writing should show what you are trying to learn, not what you already know

WOTS participants in 2019 enjoy lunch and conversation on a glorious fall day in Edmonds.

In this post, I am attempting to do all three. I am rewriting my interpretation of the past to be more positive. I now feel grateful for all that happened, good and bad, for I would not be who I am today without the valleys and peaks, darkness and light. My new goal is to focus on those past events that propelled me forward. My blog evolved not because I have answers, but because I’m trying to learn more in order to help my clients and readers.

Try It: Reframe Your Past for a Better Future

If you have followed my blog for a while, you may remember a previous post about reframing self-talk for greater positive gains. Rewriting narratives about your past does something similar. It gives you back control over what the past means to you.

Try This:

What story are you telling yourself that makes you sad?

What were some of the positives that came from experiencing that event? If you went through a divorce, for example, can you focus on the opportunities that followed or on what you learned from it?

Can you focus on the happy memories or life lessons a person taught you who might no longer be with us?

If you are working through the pain of an empty nest, could you look for ways to celebrate your new freedom or new ways to connect with your grown children?

Rewrite the past using reframing: I am grateful for the pain in my life -- including 9/11, the death of Emily, and COVID -- so that I could appreciate all the many joys including my dog Ajax, my lovely college daughter, my husband, my clients, and my blog readers. — Rewrite the past using reframing: I am grateful for the pain in my life — including 9/11, the death of Emily, and COVID — so that I could appreciate all the many joys including my dog Ajax, my lovely college daughter, my husband, my clients, and my blog readers.

If you struggle to rewrite any of your past hurts, please comment in the box below or contact me privately so that we might brainstorm possible ways to get past the pain and get you unstuck. I value and respect all comments and look forward to hearing from you. Rewrite those stories. Onward, upward, forward.

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Walking Meditation: How to Enjoy Granite Mountain in Fall

Last Thursday, Ajax and I headed for Exit 47, one of my favorite hiking locations during the pandemic. We’d last hiked to Granite Mountain in August of 2021. The muggy, buggy, smoky hike had me questioning whether I’d made the right choice. There was no question this time. A momentary lull between forest fires meant crisp, clear air, fog, and low clouds. My daughter had successfully completed her first day of college classes. I had some downtime between clients. My husband had a full day of work. So, I seized some quiet time to reflect, move, and hopefully see a few views. What resulted was a beautiful walking meditation among the lovely fall foliage.

Thick fog blankets the avalanche chute as we made our way up Granite Mountain switchbacks.

What is Walking Meditation?

My own form of “walking meditation” is different from popular literature. My definition incorporates the following elements from forays into forest bathing.

Feel the sensations of each part of your foot from heel to toe. Notice any hot spots or pebbles.
Walk with deliberate intention. Swing your arms freely. If you use a trekking pole, trade hands to stay in balance.
Let yourself notice the beauty surrounding you.

Sitka mountain ashes were absolutely stunning in their red and orange coats in the alpine meadows. Mother Nature's fall foliage has never been so beautiful. — Sitka mountain ashes were absolutely stunning in their red and orange coats in the alpine meadows. Mother Nature’s fall foliage has never been so beautiful.

Focus your attention on the breath, on a point in front of you, on sounds – pick one. It’s okay to shift, just notice when you do. Think of focus as a brain muscle that needs developing, like the heart needs cardiovascular training while the bones, tendons, joints, and ligaments need strength training.
Feel sensations of the breeze on your face, the cobwebs across the trail, the leaves under your feet, the sweat on your arms.
Notice when thoughts take over. Gently remind yourself that they are an interpretation in the present moment.
Release all “shoulds.”

Hiking Without Metrics

Whenever I hike with a human partner, I find I focus more on our conversation than on our surroundings. And as a trainer, I have been known to ask clients to track various aspects of their hikes including ascent time, moving time, elevation gain, and distance. This year, however, I hiked without a pedometer, Whoop strap, Oura ring, or GPS, to the surprise of some of my hiking partners. I always have my cell phone with me for emergencies, so I’m aware of the passage of time. But my focus is on staying comfortable. Moving how my body wants to (including dunking my feet). Enjoying whatever Mother Nature reveals. Being fully present at the moment, as much as possible.

Hiking buddy Ajax waits on the boulders in the avalanche gully.

Thoughts During the Ascent

For this walking meditation, we left the trailhead at 6:45 with only one person on the trail ahead of us. For the next few hours, we had the mountain all to ourselves. I had plenty of time to think. But some of my thoughts were rather unexpected. And they bumped all over the place, revealing my present state of mind.

What would it be like to be completely alone, with no human interaction, for months?
What would I do if something happened to my husband, my daughter, or my dog?
Would we hear another bear like we did last year?
How will my daughter handle her current roommate situation at the University of Washington?
How do I really feel about this new stage in my life?
Why am I here?
What should I do next with my life?

Our walking meditation revealed Mother Nature's finest colors. — Our walking meditation revealed Mother Nature’s finest colors.

Everyone who is loving and human has (or will have) variations of these thoughts at some point in their lives. But walking meditation enables you to recognize them as thoughts and let them float by. I was not out there to solve anything, necessarily. I was out there to let myself be, thoughts and all. And hopefully come back grounded.

Alone: What Is Your Reaction to Solitude?

I also spent more time than I expected thinking about the survival reality series, Alone. My husband and I stumbled across season eight on Netflix several weeks ago, and it captivated us so strongly that we started watching previous seasons on the History channel.

What compels a person to leave their homes and families for an unknown period of time? at an unspecified location? with ten pieces of survival gear and no water or food? What do they discover about themselves in the wilderness, and what makes them tap out (quit the contest)? Some of the show’s participants last less than 24 hours. Would we run into bears on the mountain like the participants? What would I do if one of us got injured?

A bountiful array of colors filled the basin below Granite Mountain's summit. — A bountiful array of colors filled the basin below Granite Mountain’s summit.

How long would I last off-grid, in an area where there are cougars, bears, and wolves, without human contact? The answer? Probably about three days, which was how long I lasted last December before I insisted on getting home to my daughter, my husband, and my dog. Certainly not the months that winners endure. On this hike to Granite Mountain, I didn’t find answers to my musings. I found something better.

Walking Meditation: Nature Replaces Thoughts

Once we hiked past the forest switchbacks and started up the avalanche gully where the maples, blueberry and huckleberry bushes, and mountain ashes were turning color, the chatter in my mind finally stilled. Mother Nature captivated me with her beautiful artwork. The foliage was even more splendid than the previous week’s hike to Gem and Snow Lakes. Jaw-dropping colors at every turn demanded to be photographed. I obliged.

View looking east from the Lookout Tower on Granite Mountain. The summer "main trail" weaves through the basin in the center of the photo and eastbound I-90 can be seen behind the mountain far left. — View looking east from the Lookout Tower on Granite Mountain. The summer “main trail” weaves through the basin in the center of the photo and eastbound I-90 can be seen behind the mountain far left.

When we reached the summit at 9:30, we enjoyed it for over half an hour, all to ourselves. I jotted down thoughts and ideas I’d had during our hike in my journal. I recalled the nasty mosquitoes I’d had to fight off the previous August and starred in the margin, “Shoulder season on Granite Mountain – NO BUGS, no people, A-MA-ZING colors.”

Musings on the Descent

On the way down, my thoughts traveled along a much different path. No need to worry about bears with hikers giggling and chattering loudly on the way up. But instead of getting annoyed, I felt relieved. I was not a contestant on Alone, after all. There were humans around me. Not many, but enough. I’d had my “me time” and felt ready to rejoin civilization. I didn’t have answers, but I was newly grounded. Nature’s beauty healed something within and gave me courage and fortitude to face whatever obstacles come next. I was right where I needed to be, both on the trail and in my life.

Ajax on the trail through Granite's alpine meadow. — Ajax on the trail through Granite’s alpine meadow.

How does hiking change you? Does it challenge, frustrate, or ground you? How? Please share your insights, reactions, or comments below. We love hearing from readers.

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How to Savor Moments: Lessons from Kenai Fjords

For the middle part of our 12-day Alaska vacation, we left Denali National Park and drove six hours south to Seward, AK. Our primary adventure was an all-day boat tour with Major Marine Tours. We chose to visit Kenai Fjords National Park‘s Northwestern Fjord. Boat tours represent a “Venn diagram” (intersection) experience for us. We each have our own ideas for how best to savor moments. My husband wanted to photograph seabirds, including several we’d never seen before. I focus on marine mammals and glaciers. And my daughter loves to capture moments with her watercolors.

To savor Kenai Fjords, we enlisted the help of Major Marine Tours. Our destination: Northwestern Fjord 8.5 hours round trip out of Resurrection Bay, AK.

Visiting Kenai Fjords

Kenai Fjords National Park can be enjoyed in several ways. You can visit by air, which we chose not to investigate. By land, you can hike to the Exit Glacier Overlook or the Harding Icefield Trail. We chose to explore the Northwestern Fjord by Major Marine Tours’ 8.5-hour encounter. It provided us access to the widest variety of tidewater, piedmont, hanging, and cirque glaciers. It also would give us the best opportunity to spot the most seabirds and marine mammals.

Hanging Glacier in Resurrection Bay. The clouds added an eeriness to the cruise that made everything feel more rugged and wild.

Wildlife in Resurrection Bay

On August 30, under mostly cloudy skies, the water was about as calm as it ever gets, according to our tour crew. Nevertheless, recalling a miserable experience during a pelagic trip years earlier, I took a dose of Dramamine before boarding. The Orca Song is a 65-foot monohull boat outfitted for 128 passengers. As long as I stayed outside the main cabin, I felt fine.

A drowsy sea otter rests in Resurrection Bay.

As we made our way across Resurrection Bay, I kept my eyes on the many cirque glaciers (alpine ice fields high in the mountains) as each one has differing characteristics.

Our first wildlife spotting was a sea otter resting on its back, hind flippers in the air. We learned that they have two layers of incredibly dense fur, more than a million fibers per square inch, and are the only marine mammals without blubber to keep them warm. Another curious otter swam toward us, effortlessly. My husband stayed on the lookout for kittiwakes, tufted and horned puffins, bald eagles, and cormorants. I hoped to add seals, sea lions, and whales to our list of marine mammals.

Horned puffin taking flight. — A horned puffin takes flight. No matter how clumsy your attempt looks, if it works and moves you forward, use it.

Savor Moments: Spire Cove

As we moved out of Resurrection Bay toward Northwestern Fjords, we navigated closer to land. We spotted a pair of bald eagles, tufted and horned puffins, and cormorants, visiting both nesting and resting spots for birds and mammals. One unique stop was at a pretty area our captain called Cathedral Spires, but online was referred to as Spire Cove. I overheard one tour participant say it reminded her of Vietnam (where I’ve never been.)

Resting Sea Lions

Beyond Spire Coves, our captain led us to pull-out places to see seals and sea lions. On the leeward side, opposite the crashing surf of the Pacific Ocean, we enjoyed visiting dozens of sea lions pulled out resting with their pups. I marveled at what they found as suitable “beds,” as it looks to me like they could either roll into the water from the slopes or get jagged cuts in their blubbery hides.

Savor Moments: Calving Tidewater Glaciers

As we made our way into the Northwestern Fjord, I remained outside taking photographs of a beautiful rainbow while most guests ate lunch. We visited one hanging and two tidewater glaciers. Their deep blue color was stunning. Chunks of ice floating in the water dwarfed several kayaks that dared to get close.

Two kayaks meander among the ice chunks, providing perspective as to just how much ice is tied up in these glaciers.

Once we were close enough, the captain silenced the engine for several minutes and safely positioned the boat so we could hear the groaning and moaning of the shifting ice. Rocks and ice tumbled from high on the glaciers and plunged into the sea, sending up clouds of ice dust and adding to the debris in the fjord. Nothing that would sink the Titanic, but we could certainly hear them clunking against the boat’s hull.

Author and teen daughter in front of the immense calving glaciers of Northwestern Fjord.

A steward pulled large chunks of ice into the boat and explained why glacier ice appears to be blue. Glacier ice is buried under many layers of ice and snow. The layers press the air out of the deep layers, causing ice to form large, dense crystals. These crystals scatter short-wave blue light, making deep layers of ice appear blue. But when large chunks of ice fall into the fjord, they look pretty much like we’d expect.

Our daughter holds a chunk of glacier ice that was saved and shaved for margaritas. — Our daughter holds a chunk of glacier ice that was rescued and shaved for margaritas.

Haul-outs for Seals

As we slowly retreated from the glaciers, we could see many years of compressed snow and ice floating in the fjord. On some of them, seal mothers pulled out to rest with their pups. We puttered slowly through the ice so as not to disturb the resting families. So adorable!

Glacier ice provides important rest pull-outs for seal mothers and their pups.

We learned that the average temperature within the park in late August and early September ranges from 37-44 degrees F. We’d brought wool hats, mittens, and our warmest coats specifically for the marine tour. Such attire allowed us to stay comfortable outside for hours despite overcast skies and ice surrounding us.

I didn’t envy the seals in such harsh, cold conditions, but then again, they have protective blubber insulation an inch thick, everywhere but their fins.

Mother seal and pup take a rest on a pull-out iceberg in Northwestern Fjord. — Mother seal and pup take a rest on a pull-out ice chunk in Northwestern Fjord.

Savor Moments: Orcas

Our last marine mammal sighting included two dozen Orca whales. In Washington pre-COVID, we used to go on whale-watching trips through Island Adventures several times a year. To see two resident pods in Alaska reminded me of everything we’ve missed during the past thirty months. In that small moment, I was reminded of all the good things we used to enjoy that we can finally do again. Another moment to savor.

Savor moments such as this. Embrace your family and community members like the two dozen Orcas we saw before finishing our one-day tour.

Savor Moments: Take-Aways

A wise coach, Tama Kieves, this week asked, “How can you reframe losing into expanding?” How can we appreciate MORE those things that we lost, that we now have again, perhaps in a new way? Can we turn our losses into necessary teachable moments and move forward with our newfound resilience and wisdom?

The author, close-up and intimate with a waterfall near Resurrection Bay, AK. Whatever you desire, go after it with a whole heart. Trust your inner wisdom.

While I will always have fond memories of the eight years that I volunteered at Woodland Park Zoo, nothing quite compares to appreciating wild animals in their natural environment. Major Marine Tours provided me with a very special birthday experience I will always remember. And reflecting provides us with ongoing lessons for growth and change if we allow ourselves time to stop and reflect.

What recent losses have you experienced that you can reframe into gains? Share them in the comments. I love to hear from readers and your comments help others grow, connect, and learn.

Featured

How to Learn from Alpine Autumn Changes

Since returning from Alaska, I’ve been eager to visit the Alpine Lakes region to see how autumn is progressing. Last week I learned that the trail to Snow and Gem Lakes has been repaired and reopened. So a friend and I decided to explore. I needed to process my daughter starting college (Convocation is today!) and hoped Mother Nature could provide solace from the tears. She provided the perfect metaphor for me to learn from alpine autumn changes. The lovely weather, beautiful fall colors, hidden blueberries, daunting challenge of a talus slope, and barefoot dip in Gem Lake paralleled my daughter’s own adventures at the University of Washington.

Ajax, T, and I enjoyed the overcast approach to Snow and Gem Lakes.

Perfect Conditions

At just after 8 a.m. on 9/23/22, the three of us headed up the trail. The forecast was for overcast skies, high 50’s, and a light breeze. Perfect hiking weather. Between conversations, my thoughts wandered to my daughter and what she might be doing on campus the weekend before her first quarter of college classes.

Fortunately, Mother Nature grounded me in the present moment. As soon as I spotted the first maples and Sitka mountain ashes in brilliant red and orange, I could only whip out my camera and search for more. Mission accomplished: beautiful colors. Absolutely breathtaking.

A brilliant maple, evidence of alpine autumn changes. Maples are common in Western MA, where I fell in love with their beauty in college. Our daughter visited Seattle's U. WA campus in May when the cherry blossoms were in full bloom. — A brilliant maple, evidence of alpine autumn changes. Maples are common in Western MA, where I fell in love with their beauty in college. Our daughter visited Seattle’s U. WA campus in May when the cherry blossoms were in full bloom.

As we returned to the cars hours later, the sun came out. It gently reminded me that my daughter will struggle and succeed. She will face stormy and sunny days, ups and downs. The only constant we face is change. Change in her living situation and growing independence. For me, coming to terms with the fact that she no longer needs me in the same way.

Our new role as parents of a college student is to support her, be a sounding board when she has questions, and let her assume an active role in navigating her college landscape. May there be as much beauty and a comparable road map for her journey as we had going to Snow and Gem Lakes.

A tarn (foreground) with the larger Snow Lake behind it, on our way back from Gem Lake.

Alpine Autumn Changes: Hidden Blueberries

We paused for a short rest stop at Snow Lake before continuing toward Gem Lake. I discovered we were in prime blueberry terrain. Score! I picked a few small ripe ones and was instantly rewarded with purple smudges on my fingers and a delicious burst of refreshing sweetness on my tongue.

A ripe wild blueberry dangles below reddening leaves, waiting to be picked.

The berries reminded me of a huckleberry hike to Mt. Catherine we did together as a family in 2021. The fruits were like hidden gems, shielded by the changing leaves. Similarly, I’m sure my daughter will find hidden gems at school if she stays on the lookout for them.

The week before University of Washington classes start, the college offers dozens of daily Dawg Daze activities. Sporting events, visits to the Zoo, and impromptu art gatherings. Foot races, movies, and pre-football game face painting.

Like me, my daughter is not much of a joiner, but I truly hope she finds a few tiny gems, moments with a friend here or sunrise there, a class she falls in love with, or a special location she visits repeatedly like Drumheller Fountain.

Uphill Climb of a Talus Slope

Just when I was convinced that “a little farther” would soon become “we’re here,” we faced the most intimidating part of the 11.3-mile hike. Our obstacle? A talus slope that seemed to swallow up the boot path. Momentarily discouraged, I waited for T. to catch up so she could have the final say.

The more we studied the slope, the more we realized that the path through the rocks was fairly level and crested not too far away. We decided we were so close, we might as well finish it up. And what a great decision it was. Other than the two gentlemen right behind us, we had the lake to ourselves and great views in every direction.

The final talus slope just about turned us around. Until we examined where the path went and decided it didn't look too bad. May my daughter, as a new university student, find her roadmap through the next four years and be as filled with excitement about the prospects as I was on reaching this slope. — The final talus slope just about turned us around. Until we examined where the path went and decided it didn’t look too bad. May my daughter, as a new university student, find her roadmap through the next four years and be as filled with excitement about the prospects as I was on reaching this slope.

The takeaway lesson for my daughter is to encourage her to persevere, even when the path is not apparent. To ask questions of those around you who might help. Collaborate. Gather more information. Then proceed, knowing you can always pause, turn around, or try something else.

Alpine Autumn Changes: Cold Dip in Gem Lake

The final lesson involves nurturing. I’ve developed a new hiking ritual this year. If my destination includes a lake, I take off my boots once I get there, so I can dunk my feet. Since we were visiting two lakes, I waited until we got to Gem, a lake I’ve never visited before. T took a pass, but Ajax joined me. It even looked like he wanted to go swimming.

The only constant in my life today is my faithful hiking companion, Ajax. How much longer will a 7-year-old dog be able to hike 12-15 miles? That, too, will eventually change.

Once again, I thought about my daughter and how she’s taking the plunge into a mighty big lake. The University of Washington admitted 7,000 first-year students this fall, 3.5 times more people than the whole of my own undergraduate experience. Talk about overwhelming! But if we can nurture her own process of finding courage, and support her to take tiny steps — maybe not her whole body at first, just her toes — she can gradually build her confidence that she can swim without sinking.

Final Words

Hokey though it may be, turning my hike experience into a life metaphor helped me feel better. It reminded me that change is a constant we can neither control nor prevent. What we CAN control is our mindset and attitude. The more I experience nature to stay grounded, centered, and connected to what matters most to me, the more gracefully I’ll handle this transition to an “empty nest.”

A final look at Snow Lake before we crested the pass and headed back to the car. Sometimes the path is more easily identified by looking backward than forward. May my daughter find a map forward to make looking back more fun.

Can lessons from nature help YOU make some big changes this fall? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.

Featured

Something for Everyone in Denali National Park

Recent blog posts focused on how to plan a multi-faceted family vacation and embark on an adventure into mindfulness while looking for wildlife in Denali National Park. Whether you are a thrill-seeker, a dog lover, an off-trail scrambler, or a scenery lover, the park has something for everyone. Read about whitewater rafting. Visit the only canine ranger kennel in the national parks system. Take a short scramble at Savage River. Fall in love with the park like we did.

Our daughter mimics a caribou in front of the Denali National Park and Preserve entry sign.

For the Thrill-Seeker: Whitewater Rafting

I asked my husband and daughter whether they wanted to try whitewater rafting. My daughter has done a few rafting trips with the Seattle Mountaineers. But it has been years since my husband and I have. They both suggested that we try the Canyon Whitewater Run.

Denali Raft Adventures outfitted us in dry suits and paddles. We spent two hours paddling on the Nenana River, just outside Denali National Park. Luc, our guide, joked that we had to test out the new dry suits. I chose to be brave and slipped into the river at his signal. Their dry suit kept me both warm and dry, clear up to my neck. Getting back in the boat, however, proved challenging. Fortunately, my husband is strong and in two tries, managed to pull me back in. If you have thrill-seeking teens, we recommend going rafting.

The Denali area has something for everyone. For the thrill-seeker in us, we chose to go whitewater rafting.

Something for Everyone: Canine Rangers

Another great family activity was visiting the park’s huskies. Denali NP is the only U.S. national park with canine rangers. The park limits motorized vehicles in winter, but rangers still have work to do. Huskies to the rescue! We got to visit their 31 adult dogs (and 3 puppies) who work as sled dogs in the winter and enjoy rest during the summer.

Canine rangers stand at attention, ready to work at the signal.

As part of their free 4 p.m. “sled dog tour,” we watched the 3 puppies “race” back to their kennels. They also have a sled demonstration during earlier tours. The tour is a perfect activity for people of all ages and abilities.

Meet the 2022 Canine Rangers, huskies who reside in Denali National Park. — Meet the 2022 Canine Rangers, the huskies who reside in Denali National Park.

For the Scrambler: Savage River

If you have kids who like getting vertical, then they’ll enjoy Savage River (Milepost 15). The park runs a free Savage River shuttle to help reduce car traffic. Lots of people also explore the braided river beds and hike on established trails.

Our daughter will hike with us if she has a friend along, a geocache to find, or berries to pick. Walking along a road looking for animals and birds? She’ll do it in moderation. When I asked if she wanted to scramble up some rocks, she agreed. While it may not be the miles and gain I enjoy with my dog Ajax, I was eager to explore anywhere, especially with company.

The short scramble took no more than thirty minutes round trip, but it provided a welcome interlude following the morning shuttle ride and afternoon search for animals. We were fortunate to have overcast skies but no rain for the first four days of our trip. We took some cool panorama shots to conclude our last afternoon in Denali National Park.

The author's husband and teenage daughter pose for a picture on the "summit" of a Savage River scramble overlooking the parking lot. — The author’s husband and teenage daughter pose for a picture on the “summit” of a Savage River scramble overlooking the parking lot.

Something for Everyone: Especially Scenery Lovers

Finally, if you want to see amazing scenery, Denali National Park is unparalleled in its beauty. Especially if you are lucky enough to visit at the tail end of the season when the alpine tundra turns vibrant colors. Every turn we took, we saw more mountains, more distant snowfields, and more profiles of animals on the ridgeline.

The braided river bed (and bridge) at Savage River, Milepost 15, in Denali National Park from our "scramble" overlook. — The braided river bed (and bridge) at Savage River, Milepost 15, in Denali National Park from our scramble overlook.

Each of our park adventures reminded me of elements I’ve enjoyed at home. Climbing is definitely for both the thrill-seeker and the scrambler. I don’t know what I’d do without dogs in my life; seeing the huskies made me miss and appreciate my hiking companion back home. And I continue to enjoy hiking and exploring the beauty of trails in the state of Washington.

Do your vacations reflect activities you love back home? Or do you try to explore things you’ve never done before? Please share any reflections or comments below. I always love to hear from readers.

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Mindful in Denali While Searching for the Big Five

Continuing from last week, this post is the second in a series about my family’s recent 12-day Alaskan vacation. Included are several exercises to increase mindful awareness. I’ve blended them with musings about my journey to remain mindful in Denali while searching for grizzly bears, moose, caribou, Dall sheep, and wolves.

Female moose foraging for food in Denali National Park.

Mindfulness Versus Meditation

This week several clients asked me to differentiate between “mindfulness” and “meditation.” I am not formally trained to teach either. But my understanding is that meditation is a process of clearing the mind by focusing on your breath while letting troublesome thoughts float by. Yoga is a popular example of meditation.

Mindfulness, on the other hand, is the practice of staying in the present. It involves paying attention to now, rather than worrying about the future or fretting about the past. I have had far more “success” with mindfulness than with meditation. Perhaps because I can practice mindfulness while brushing my teeth, walking Ajax, washing dishes, or taking photographs.

Grizzly bear foraging for berries and tubers beside a stream wash.

When Mindfulness Doesn’t Work

I found myself reflecting on my mental state during our recent Alaska trip. One of our favorite activities on family vacations is to photograph wildlife, whether we are on a boat, looking for birds, or driving park roads. Denali National Park is known for five large mammals, fondly referred to as the big five. We located all but wolves.

Admittedly, there were times I caught myself not being mindful. Was my daughter enjoying her graduation trip? Should I have used a different camera carrier than the one draped awkwardly across my body? Would one can of bear spray be enough if we had another unexpected encounter with a grizzly? My standing joke is, “I worry so bad things won’t happen.” How much better would my experiences be if I ditch worry and focus on NOW?

This male caribou seemed as fascinated by us as we were with him. I remain stunned by the gorgeous autumn colors we were fortunate to see.

Try This #1

Provided are a few thought exercises to help you explore mindfulness. Try recording the answers to the following questions to tune in to what you are doing RIGHT NOW:

How are you feeling? Where do you feel it?
What do you need? A drink of water, a nap, a bite of chocolate, a walk? Can you give it to yourself?
If you could have anything, what would you love today? A massage, a million-dollar bonus, a new boss? The sky is the limit.
What are you most proud of from today, this week, and this month? Consider reviewing my post on gratitude.

While exploring sounds in Denali as we walked the road near MP 43, we kept hearing odd squeaks reminding me of pikas and marmots. We finally located the source, a family of cute Arctic ground squirrels.

Mindful in Denali: Logistics of Animal Searches

To look for wildlife in Denali, we first needed to understand where we were allowed to go to look for animals. Denali National Park limits car traffic on the paved road to Savage River (MP 15). Beyond that, a narrated bus or a shuttle bus from the bus depot near the park entrance at MP .5 was the only motorized option. We could also bike or walk. In late summer 2022, Denali’s single road was only open as far as milepost 43, due to the Pretty Rocks landslide. We chose the shuttle bus.

We have seen moose on trips to the Tetons, Glacier, and Yellowstone National Parks, but we'd heard they're much more prevalent in Alaska, even in Anchorage. We spotted four on our jaunt north toward Denali National Park. — Moose are also visible in the Tetons, Glacier, and Yellowstone National Parks, but we’d heard they’re much more prevalent in Alaska, even in Anchorage. We spotted four on our jaunt north toward Denali National Park.

The mammals we were looking for forage during the morning and evening hours. Our primary access limitations were our teen daughter’s sleeping needs and available seats in the shuttle buses. The two days we took the bus, we reached our exploration areas around noon. Fortunately, plenty of animals graze all day long.

We knew from six visits to Yellowstone National Park that we’d each need a good pair of binoculars, especially to spot wolves and Dall sheep. My husband and I had our digital cameras ready, as our cell phones don’t take good wildlife close-ups.

Our shuttle bus driver pointed out tips about local landmarks as he drove, including slowing down for photographs of wildlife near — or in — the road. All the photos included in this post were taken using a 100-400 mm lens so we would not interrupt their natural behavior.

This male caribou wandered across the road without much concern about the tin boxes traveling around him.

Try This: #2

If you have 15-20 minutes available, go for a sensory walk someplace you don’t normally visit. Do NOT listen to music or record steps on a biometric device. Take yourself off autopilot and sink into the moment. A watch is okay if you need to be back at a certain time.

What do you see?
Can you identify any new scents? What do you smell? Are they pleasant or not?
Listen to as many things as you can hear. Can you find ten distinct sounds? Learning birdsong is a great way to activate your hearing.

Pay attention to the breeze, textures, sense of heat or cold, and sun on your face. What do you feel?
Do you “taste” anything around you? Berries, the aroma of coffee, or the ‘taste’ of wildfire smoke?
Finally, do you feel safe? Harried? Nervous? Relaxed? What contributes to your overall interpretation of sensory input?

Unexpected Delights from Being Mindful in Denali

What we missed by arriving at the start of Alaska’s rainy season, we more than made up for by hitting the jaw-dropping autumn colors perfectly. If I’d been too focused on finding the animals, I might not have fully appreciated the beauty surrounding us. What’s more, we learned more about animal behavior by being fully open to the experience.

The driver told us that bull moose were congregating for their annual rut. We could also see various stages of velvet on the caribou’s antlers. By doing plenty of research ahead of time, we knew what to expect and where we might find birds and mammals. Consider creating a “perhaps list” so that you have plenty of options to choose from. And reflect on the type of animal behavior you are interested in seeing so that you can time your trip based on what you’re likely to see.

Dall sheep high up in an alpine tundra meadow. We spotted a dozen as we walked east from Icicle Canyon. — Dall sheep high up in an alpine tundra meadow. We spotted a dozen as we walked east from Igloo Creek Campground at MP 33.6.

Try This: #3

As you go about your daily business, pause every so often and look around you. Notice how the light hits the clock. Watch dust motes float in the sun. Observe how your hands play in the suds while doing dishes. The more we can bring awareness and attention to what we are doing, the more we will be able to appreciate the present moment. We live NOW, not tomorrow or yesterday.

While shooting photos of wildlife, I am fully focused on the present moment: what I can see, hear, and feel. I was mindful in Denali when we spotted this foraging grizzly bear.

As always, if you have experiences you’d like to share related to mindfulness or novelty, please feel free to share them in the comments so that we can all learn, grow, and discuss.

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How to Plan a Great Alaska Vacation

My teenage daughter, husband, and I just spent twelve wonderful days exploring south-central Alaska. A friend asked, how did you plan such a great Alaska vacation? I glibly replied that it took months. Realizing that I didn’t really answer her question, I thought it might make a fun blog topic to kick off a series of posts featuring Alaska musings and photos.

Planning a vacation is much like pursuing any important goal, whether you want to write a novel, change jobs, climb a mountain, or start a new hobby.

A grizzly bear forages near the road in Denali National Park. I couldn't get enough of the mammals and gorgeous fall colors. — A grizzly bear forages near the road in Denali National Park. I couldn’t get enough of the mammals and gorgeous fall colors.

Start By Knowing Your Parameters

The first step in planning anything is to consider all your parameters. In June when we asked our daughter where she’d like to go for her graduation present, she mentioned Alaska. We got to work researching possibilities. When we knew our budget, roughly what we wanted to see and do, and how long we could travel, we tried to figure out when we could take two weeks of vacation.

Our best look at Denali on day 4 as we left the area. My highest priority was spending time viewing wildlife in Denali National Park, while hopefully getting a glimpse of North America's highest mountain. — Our best look at Denali on day 4 as we left the area. My highest priority was spending time viewing wildlife in Denali National Park, while hopefully getting a glimpse of North America’s highest mountain.

Time — Duration, Time of Year

Time turned out to be a crucial consideration. Our daughter starts college in mid-September, so we originally considered going right after Labor Day. Such a late trip could mean shoulder-season prices and fewer tourists. But that far north, many of the activities we wanted to do (i.e. white water rafting, glacier cruising, visiting Denali National Park, and seeing wildlife) would already be ending for the season. We settled on August 24-September 3.

We were lucky enough to see the Northern Lights on our last evening in Anchorage (9/3/22). I'd written it off early in the planning as I thought the longer daylight would make it impossible to see unless we were up very late at night. — We were lucky enough to see the Northern Lights on our last evening in Anchorage (9/3/22). I’d written it off early in the planning as I thought the longer daylight would make it impossible to see unless we were up very late at night.

Location — Regions, Cities, National Parks

I love to photograph wildlife, especially bears in their natural habitat. We learned that the best photo opportunities with grizzly bears would be at Brooks Falls in July when the salmon return to spawn. Missed it. We decided not to drive all the way to Homer, which is the closest place to catch a plane to visit the Brooks Falls bears (click the link to see live bear cam action!). Homer is also popular for fishing; since we don’t fish, eliminating it resulted in a driving corridor between Denali and Kenai Fjords National Parks, roughly six hours apart with Anchorage falling between.

We bought tickets for flights between Anchorage and SeaTac and finalized our itinerary:

4 nights in Cantwell in an air B&B RV, 20 miles south of Denali National Park
3 nights in Seward in a small cabin air B&B, 6 miles north of the small boat harbor and close to a fish weir
4 nights in Anchorage in the bottom half of a house, centrally located a few miles south of the airport

The foliage in Denali National Park was just changing colors. Late August is already fall in central to north Alaska while our home city of Seattle remained deep in summer. — The foliage in Denali National Park was just changing colors. Autumn reaches central Alaska in late August, whereas Seattle remains summer-like until mid-September.

Transportation and Lodging

We reserved a rental car from Enterprise; we chose a small car for three and our luggage, without extras. But we understand it’s not necessary to drive in Alaska like it is the lower 48. Taking the train is a fun option, and boats and seaplanes go everywhere. Because we value our independence and steer clear of large organized groups, it made the most sense for us.

As for lodging, we enjoy staying at air B&Bs, to see how people in the region live. Our RV was definitely the coldest, most remote, and most cramped stay, but we also got the best night’s sleep there. And the hospitality our Anchorage host gave us — danishes for breakfast, homegrown flowers on the stairs, and conversation around his fire pit the last night — was unprecedented.

This lovely display of homemade dahlias was arranged by our Anchorage host, Javier.

Add Activities — Rafting, Panning for Gold, and More

The final stage of planning included what we would do each day. This task usually falls to me. The week before our trip, I ran into some glitches with my computer and lost hours’ worth of research and planning. Twice. By the time I had our final itinerary ready the day before we departed, I knew exactly what we were going to do.

Our family adventures included:

Visiting Denali National Park
Meeting Working Huskies in DNP
Wildlife photography and hiking from DNP shuttles
White water rafting in Denali

The well-trained, oh-so-attentive Denali sled dogs and their kennels went on high alert just before their show.

Birding and photography throughout the trip
Tracking license plates — forty states and five Canadian provinces were represented!
Taking a birthday cruise to Northwestern Glacier in Kenai Fjords National Park out of Seward

The author with her tall college-bound daughter in front of Northwest Glacier. Not sure what she was standing on... — The author with her tall college-bound daughter in front of Northwest Glacier. Not sure what she was standing on…

Visiting the Alaska Sealife Center in Seward on a rainy day
Panning for gold
Exploring Alaska State Fair in Palmer and a 2100-pound pumpkin

Seeing the Musk Ox Farm in Palmer, the only one in the world
Learning at the Alaska Native Heritage Center in Anchorage
Discovering art in the Alaska Museum in Anchorage
Catching the northern lights on our last night

Enjoy Your Great Alaska Vacation

After all of that planning, what remained was to go and enjoy ourselves. Except we forgot one major thing: Alaska does not recognize T-mobile, our cell phone provider. As soon as we landed in Anchorage, before our drive north, we had to locate a place that sold SIM cards so we could still place calls to local restaurants and shops. It’s not something we ever thought to check, but next time we travel anywhere, we certainly will!

The other big takeaway is you cannot possibly visit all of Alaska in one trip. Pick a national park or two. Choose a region. Narrow it down to a few favorite activities. Our twelve-day trip was an appetizer. The four adjectives I’ve used the most this week are vast, rugged, varied, and beautiful.

If you are considering a visit to Alaska, plan on staying for a month or two. July is their dry season, while late August is considered the start of autumn. And we never had an issue with mosquitoes!

MOOOOOSE! A great Alaska vacation for me includes Dall sheep, grizzly bears, caribou, and moose. If you also see a wolf you've "hit a grand slam." — MOOOOOSE! A great Alaska vacation for me includes Dall sheep, grizzly bears, caribou, and moose. If you also see a wolf you’ve “hit a grand slam.”

Now the fun starts: processing over 2000 photographs and all we experienced while avoiding anticipointment. In the words of Arnold Schwarzenegger, “I’ll be back.” As you read this blog, if you found yourself particularly interested in a location or activity, please leave a comment so I know to include more about it in upcoming posts.

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How to Let Go of the Need to Control

Last week a client asked me which feels more daunting: climbing Mt. Rainier or helping our only child get ready to start college next month. To me, Mt. Rainier feels way easier. Perhaps it has more to do with the fact that I’ve reached the summit eight times. It’s familiar, predictable, and finite. Launching a college student is a once-in-a-lifetime milestone we will never experience again. It’s had its ups and downs over the past eighteen years, and we never found the parenting user’s manual. So many things can — and probably will — still go wrong. As my roles as an author, coach, and parent collide in spinning turmoil, my role is to let go of the need to control.

Once we cleared away enough of the insidious bamboo grass a few weeks ago, this rose bush once again began to thrive. I cannot control its rate of growth but I can certainly improve conditions to give it a better chance.

Who Has a Need to Control?

As I ponder my various roles, I ask myself: which one has a need to control? The answer: all of them. But knowing that, I can work to change it.

Authors

Authors need to design every aspect of their story. In a way, they’re playing God, throwing rocks at their protagonist and giving them increasingly difficult challenges. They may have control over their characters and the worlds they create. But as soon as they look for an editor, agent, and publishing house, everything changes. They have control over one thing: the process of creating. But ultimately, the one in control of reading what’s published is the reader.

Coaches

Coaches try to help their clients by providing detailed workouts, guidance, and moral support. We introduce clients to helpful resources and effective strategies for getting to their goals. But when clients miss a workout, get sick or injured, become overworked, or lose interest, we realize the truth: coaches are not in control; the client is. Coaches only have control over what they bring to the relationship.

Parents

Parents try to ensure that no harm comes to their offspring, sometimes stepping in when they should let their child struggle. I’ve been asking myself, “What challenges will she face? Have we prepared her well enough to handle them? How often will she have to fall flat on her face before she is independent?” (The answer, if I sit still long enough to listen to inner wisdom, is “As often as it takes.”) Our role is changing from provider and protector to collaborator and advisor. We are no longer in control of her choices; she is. And really, hasn’t it been that way for some time now?

An image that helps me release the need to control is letting my tumultuous thoughts flow around me like water, while remaining anchored. — An image that helps me release the need to control is letting my tumultuous thoughts flow around me like water while remaining anchored.

The Illusion of Control

Dr. Seuss said, “Only you can control your future.” By that, I think he meant we are the only ones who can take strides in whatever we feel is the right direction at the time. Others suggest that control is an illusion. And Napoleon Hill is quoted as saying, “You either control your mind or it controls you.” How do we wrap our heads around the fact that so much is out of our control?

By focusing on those few aspects we do — like our thoughts, our behaviors, our actions — and minimizing the impact of those we don’t, such as weather, what others think of us, and other people’s actions.

Whenever I feel the overwhelming need to control some aspect of my writing, my clients’ workouts, or my daughter’s life, I take deep breaths and remind myself that I’m doing the best I can with the tools available to me. And I erase the need to be perfect.

I keep reminding myself of my resolution post on kisage (Keep It Simple And Good Enough) from January. We have done enough, and anywhere we haven’t, she’ll learn more quickly than if we do it for her. I’ve added the catchy phrase, “Let go, let it be good.” (For the second phrase, I’ve replaced the popular “let God” with what works for me.)

A pair of raccoons stares back at me as their two siblings climb down a nearby tree. Our dog tried to give chase but thankfully he must have heard something in my unusual tone of voice that stopped him from getting into a tussle. We cannot control nature, but we can control how we interact with it: with respect for all living things.

Additional Resources

Instead of trying to control everything, I like to remind myself of tips from the following posts on CourtSchurmanGo.com:

Fear is a normal aspect of life, but we don’t need to let it RULE our lives. We can prepare ourselves, our clients, our families, and our colleagues the best we can. A year ago I posted about letting go of my daughter; by being self-compassionate today I can recognize that this process will likely take several more years. We can be curious about what our inner critic teaches us without letting it dominate. And we can stick to our own moral compass, so we can do the very best we can. Then let go, and let it be good.

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Kendall Katwalk and Four Reasons to Repeat Hikes

A year ago, I met G. on the trail to Kendall Katwalk. He was traveling at roughly my pace. We struck up a conversation and hiked several hours together before Ajax and I reached our turn-around time. On August 13, 2022, we met the same hike, same trailhead, to provide moral support. He was over halfway through his quest to hike the PCT northbound from the Oregon-Washington border to Stevens Pass. So, with fresh fruit and doggie kisses, we escorted him to Ridge Lake and Gravel Lake on the final leg of his journey.

Red Mountain bathed in early morning fog on the approach to Kendall Katwalk.

Lessons Learned Along Kendall Katwalk

“Nature is not a place to visit, it is home.” — Gary Snyder

No matter how many times I return to a favorite trail, I nearly always see something new, experience something different, or find that conditions have changed seasonally. But always, I feel comfortable simply being myself. Isn’t that what home is supposed to feel like? As I hiked the 7.5 miles back to the car, I added a reason to repeat that I hadn’t experienced before: to celebrate.

The Katwalk, a thin trail blasted out of a sheer drop-off that can be quite intimidating and exposed under lots of snow. — The Katwalk is a thin trail blasted out of a sheer drop-off that can be quite intimidating and exposed under lots of snow.

Repeat to Inform

The first reason to repeat a hike is to provide information. I often recommend that clients find a trail to return to monthly. Repeating such a hike can provide insight into how your workout program is affecting your fitness. Whenever I visit Mt. Washington, arguably my favorite early season hike, I know exactly how long it takes to reach my first clothing break, “peeing rock,” the overlook, the sign to the Great Wall, the creek, the lake, and the turnstile.

Natural markers provide motivation and challenge while boosting my confidence, especially if I am alone. What’s more, finding a favorite tree, boulder, or vista is sort of like running into an old friend. Who says friends can’t be inanimate objects?

Even within a day, the same scenery can change. Here in the afternoon, Red Mountain gets illuminated by sunbeams poking through the dense clouds.

Repeat to Enjoy Seasonal Novelty

Another reason to repeat a hike is for sheer enjoyment. Kendall Katwalk boasts gorgeous views of the Snoqualmie Pass mountain peaks (as well as Rainier on a clear day.) Splendidly colored iron-rich rocks like Red Mountain contrast with blue skies, snowy white chutes, and gray granite. Alpine lakes poke up around every third bend. Wildflowers beckon.

Mammal-watching (dogs, marmots, humans, and picas, to mention a few) is unparalleled. And if you like dramatic exposure, the Katwalk delivers. While the trail can be hot and dusty this time of year, we were fortunate. We did the entire fifteen-mile hike this year without my dog overheating like last year. Win!

A patch of columbine draws my eye as we climbed toward the Katwalk.

Repeat to Gain Confidence

Third, by letting yourself get to know a trail well, you can branch out and explore side trails. Such is the case for me on Tiger Mountain. You can also engage in deep philosophical conversations with fellow hikers and remain confident that you’ll be able to get back to the car.

Sometimes on new trails, I don’t know what to expect. If I’m worried about getting back to town by a certain time, I almost always choose a destination I know well, so I don’t run the risk of getting lost. While I enjoy novelty and exploring new places, it throws me off my pace because I’m focused on making sure I know exactly where I am.

Repeat to Celebrate

But on this trip, my biggest reason to repeat the hike to Kendall Katwalk was that it’s where our training journey started. I wanted to provide moral support and encouragement for my client in pursuit of such a big goal. We’d both encountered challenging obstacles in the past year, joking at times that we were one-upping (one-downing?) each other. He’d proven to me that he had what it takes to succeed. I willingly took on the role of cheerleader in the final months.

I am 100% sold on alpine lake foot soaks as a restorative practice at the halfway point of any hike. Grounding plays a similar role as half-time or intermission, refocusing the mind and rejuvenating the body. — I am 100% sold on alpine lake foot soaks as a restorative practice at the halfway point of any hike. My feet in Ridge Lake. Grounding plays a similar role as half-time or intermission, refocusing the mind and rejuvenating the body.

When I handed him a nectarine at our first rest stop after about 3.5 miles, I thought he might cry tears of happiness. And at our turn-around spot at mile 7.5 at Ridge Lake, I surprised my client with a peach. Ajax downed his lunch. My reward was taking off my hiking boots to soak my feet.

A Tribute to Success

Turning around at Ridge Lake felt bittersweet. G. still had nine miles to hike, and I faced a long dusty trail with Ajax. And about three hundred other backpackers, dogs, day hikers, and trail runners. Maybe one day I’ll become a trail angel, carrying gallons of orange juice or dozens of pieces of fresh fruit to hikers on remote trails. One thing is clear, though. No matter how much you doubt yourself, the best thing you can do is take that next step. Have someone who believes in you give you a pep talk (hey, that’s me!) Then get out there and try it. You may surprise yourself.

Dedicated to G. who taught me to chat with strangers on the trail, dispense free training advice, and give generously to my clients. A special doggy cuddle before we parted ways at Ridge Lake. You did it! So proud of you!

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How to Follow Doctor’s Orders: Go Hike

On Tuesday, my Naturopath told me she thought I needed to go visit my happy place, preferably with lots of greenery. I didn’t need to be told twice. It had been a month since I’d been out hiking, which is way too long for me to go without. I blamed the scorching heat in July and illness in early August. But I knew she was right: I needed a healthy dose of the mountains. I drove with Ajax to Exit 47 and we enjoyed a lovely overcast 12-mile hike to Island, Rainbow, and Olallie Lakes. It matched my doctor’s orders perfectly.

Doctor's orders: go for a hike. View looking south over Olallie Lake toward Mt. Rainier. The fog in the background obscured this lake on the way back; I'm glad I took a moment to snap this shot when I did. — Doctor’s orders: go for a hike. View looking south over Olallie Lake toward Mt. Rainier. The fog in the background obscured this lake on the way back; I’m glad I took a moment to snap this shot when I did.

How Solo Hiking Fills Doctor’s Orders

About a month ago, I wrote about nine joys and benefits of solo hiking. I discovered new ones on my most recent trip to the mountains.

Hiking Is a Form of Meditation

If you’re anything like me, you probably roll your eyes and scroll past this paragraph to see what the other benefits are. Seriously? Meditation? Trust me, I am not one to sit in cross-legged position or stare at a candle saying “Ommmm.” If walking can be meditative, then my closest form is hiking. I listen for birdsong, guess how close we are to running water, study the landscape for spots of color, or watch my dog for signs of squirrels, rabbits, picas, marmots, woodpeckers, or deer.

When the trail bends away from the highway and civilization drops away, I notice the change in sounds. And I can tell when we’re about to come up on other hikers. Hiking turns on my mindfulness and makes me pay attention like nothing else in the city does.

Hiking is a form of meditation. It helps me put things into better perspective. Seeing this enormous Douglas fir against the tiny but mighty Ajax makes me realize that we are all interconnected, and in that one moment we were all enjoying the same space in the forest. — Hiking is a form of meditation. It helps me put things into better perspective. Seeing this enormous Douglas fir against the tiny but mighty Ajax makes me realize that we are all interconnected, and in that one moment, we all enjoyed the same space in the forest.

Hiking to Handle DRY: Dealing with Real Yuck

If I can’t make heads or tails out of what my life has become, or I’m afraid to move forward on something daunting or scary, hitting the trail with none other than my dog is one of the most therapeutic things I can do. In her book, Rising Strong, Brene Brown writes, “We can choose courage or we can choose comfort, but we can’t have both. Not at the same time.” As I swatted at mosquitoes and struggled up the dusty trail, covered head to toe in light cloth in order to prevent bug bites, I was able to “center myself” again. I returned to the state of a human being, rather than doing.

Ajax at Rainbow Lake on August 9 in the fog. I may arrive at the trailhead with brain fog, but I nearly always return to the car with clarity.

Hiking is a Great Way to Create

Almost invariably as I make my way up the trail, I think about my WIPs (works in progress) or future blog posts. I let my mind wander while my body does what it has for over thirty-five years. By feeding myself new sensory input — different things to look at, smell, listen to, and feel — I allow the right side of my brain to make new connections, which helps me clear away the brain fog and clutter. By snapping photographs and asking myself targeted questions, I usually come home with a direction for my next blog post.

Hiking Becomes a Form of Gratitude

One of my practices on the way back to the car is to rattle off all the many things I am grateful for, from those people (and animals!) who make my life as rich as it is, to the wonderful things in my life from my health, strength, and home to the opportunities I have to hike in the middle of the week and play whenever I need to.

Doctor’s Orders: Make Time to Soak the Feet

I also had several new-to-me experiences on this hike. The first was bringing a book so I could take a reading break at Island Lake. I had Dusti Bowling’s 24 Hours in Nowhere with me, a novel set in the dry dusty desert of the southwest. At the three-hour mark, I waded into Island Lake, then sat and read a chapter of my book while Ajax watched for chipmunks and squirrels. Four female backpackers and a couple with a dog had just left their camp spots, so we had the lake all to ourselves. What’s more, the half hour I spent without boots on meant my feet felt 100% recovered the next day. Win!

New-to-me experience of soaking my feet in Island Lake while reading a chapter from a book.

Follow the Leader

The other new-to-me experience was following my dog’s lead twice. When we left Island Lake, I debated whether to continue right toward the car or left toward Rainbow Lake. Ajax turned left, and I decided not to call him back. Who was I to tell him no? We were both doing great and the bugs hadn’t been too bad at Island Lake.

Then at the Olallie Lake signpost 90 minutes from the car, he turned right instead of left. I figured he would have no trouble going another mile. So, we did. However, when he wanted to turn right toward Talapus Lake, I put my foot down. He had turned down all three offerings of food and I was starting to worry about him. We went back toward the car.

A sprig of beargrass in front of Rainbow Lake in the fog.

Return to Blogging

I originally intended to start blogging again in September once I return from Alaska. But I couldn’t wait that long. Blogging about change helps me make consistent changes in my own life. And with a daughter about to enter college, I know I am going to need the continuity to stay grounded.

My intent is to post on Thursdays going forward, but I will miss August 25 and September 1. Know that we have returned to semi-consistent posting. And if you have topics you would like me to address, please leave a comment below. I love to hear from my readers! Onward, upward, forward!

Fog-draped Rainbow Lake. Hikes always help me steer through the murkiness to greater clarity.

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How to Accomplish Your Goal and Handle Anticippointment

A reader recently asked if I could provide strategies for dealing with the “let-down” that comes from accomplishing your goal. Many of my Body Results clients are having adventures this month and will be facing the question, “What’s next?” I, too, have reached a major milestone: this is blog post 50 in as many weeks. Below are some resources, suggestions, and strategies that might help.

A local artist painted the walls of this music building in North Seattle. What's the secret to keeping the celebration going after accomplishing your goal? — A local artist painted the walls of this music building in North Seattle. What’s the secret to keeping the celebration going after accomplishing your goal?

What Is Anticipointment?

I first stumbled upon the blended word, “anticipointment,” (anticipating disappointment) in Dana Simpson’s graphic novel, Unicorn Playlist, Another Phoebe and her Unicorn Adventure. In it, young Phoebe tells her sparkly unicorn buddy that she enjoys the anticipation of the holidays, but she also knows she will feel let down after the festivities are over.

Because I love playing with words, I created another phrase: “post-venturum depression.” (Think postpartum depression in a mosh pit with adventuring.) It describes the mental struggle some thru-hikers feel after completing their multi-day adventures on the PCT, CDT, or AT. Climbers sometimes experience it after reaching summits like Mt. Everest, Denali, Aconcagua, and Kilimanjaro. I imagine backpackers attempting the Wonderland Trail and alpinists taking multi-day trips up the Cascade volcanoes might, as well.

Descending from the summit block of Eldorado the summer our daughter turned six. We went from leading more than fifteen climbs in 2003 to once a year when we became new parents. One goal evolved into another. — Descending from the summit block of Eldorado the summer our daughter turned six. We went from leading more than fifteen climbs in 2003 to once a year as new parents. One goal evolved into another.

Goal Turned Into a Career

My first encounter with “anticipointment” came just after my first Mt. Rainier summit. As a graduate student at the University of Washington, I was used to competing in 2-5 km crew races (which last minutes), not high-altitude climbs (which require days). As soon as I got home, exhausted from the adrenaline rush of crossing narrow snow bridges over gaping crevasses, I told myself I’d never do that again.

And yet, several days later, the mountain peeked out from the clouds, and I knew I was hooked. That burning desire led to joining the Seattle Mountaineers later that summer. I’ve since climbed Mt. Rainier eight times, along with dozens of other peaks in the Cascade Mountains. For nearly 25 years I have devoted time helping others enjoy the thrill of adventuring in the mountains safely. What started as a weekend goal with classmates turned into an entire career.

Parenthood

However, it’s hard to do glacier climbs — which involves being away for more than a day — with a young child at home. I replaced climbing with motherhood. I also cut back on my work hours in order to give my daughter every possible opportunity.

Parenting never ends; it merely changes according to life stages. When my goals have changed, a “cure” to avoid any slump includes enjoying every bit of the journey and focusing on the GAINS rather than the GAPS. Hiking with my dog Ajax has replaced climbing, at least temporarily. Blogging replaced fiction writing, at least temporarily. Seeing the many achievements and abilities of the delightful young person we’ve raised has no equal. So how am I preparing for the next stage?

Getting a child successfully through elementary, middle, and high school is a huge adventure. Parenting doesn't end there, but after eighteen years it definitely changes significantly. — Getting a child successfully through elementary, middle, and high school is a huge adventure. Parenting doesn’t end there, but after eighteen years it definitely changes significantly.

Beyond Accomplishing Your Goal

Wanda Thibodeaux of Inc.com suggests five ways to move on after reaching a milestone. Her advice is incredibly accurate.

Be involved in multiple projects. In my case, I had my fingers in the writing, coaching, climbing, home ownership (and all that entails), and parenting pies.
Know what you will focus on next after you reach the primary goal. I admit this is trickier the longer you’ve been working toward a goal. For nineteen years I’ve been focused on being the best mom I can be and raising a wonderful daughter. Will the goals I had before still fit? Doubtful. But I am already looking for the next thing.
Reflect on what you’ve learned. I do a lot of journaling about how my life has changed at various stages.
Explore neglected parts of yourself. Writing, hiking, coaching, and feeling deeply have all been skill sets I’ve been developing for the past few years, in anticipation of having more uninterrupted time both alone and with my husband.
Help others. Writing a blog, coaching, and volunteering all allow me to pass on tidbits that have worked for myself and for those I have been fortunate to coach.

Glacier Peak from above the cloud line on Eldorado, 2010. When you only get one climb a year, you put everything into it.

Accomplishing Your Goal: Seeking New Direction

Kristin Wong, from Well and Good, mentions three additional strategies that I plan to implement in this new phase:

Enjoy the time between goals. The question becomes: HOW MUCH time will I put between blog posts 50 and 51? As long as it takes.
Determine what you are really after AND WHY. If you want to be a creative person, find ways to do that daily. If you want to be physically active, find something you love and do it regularly and consistently, whether that’s walking, swimming, doing yoga, dancing, or hiking. Someone who wants to be a giving person might volunteer. If you want to keep hiking after your big thru-hike, research fun places you want to explore in the shoulder or off-season and keep going.
Explore something new. Since three big goals will end for me this summer — sending our daughter to college, completing a year of blogging, and visiting Alaska — I am prepared for a challenging September. I’m already exploring. Books to review. Hikes Ajax and I might do. Manuscripts to dust off. Friends to reconnect with. Ways to change my blog. Places my husband and I can explore together. This is not an end, merely a change. And as my husband so aptly put it, “If you embrace change as an opportunity to move forward, rather than an indication that something is broken, you can find joy anywhere.”

Sunset on Rainier. The end of one chapter means another is starting. Accomplishing your goal can inspire new ones. What will YOUR next adventure be? Join me for mine. — Sunset at Camp Muir on Mt. Rainier. The end of one chapter means another is starting. Accomplishing your goal can inspire new ones. What will YOUR next adventure be? Join me for mine.

The Next Chapter

When we enjoy the process and path on the way to the goal, we are less likely to “hit a slump” and more likely to flow to the next thing. Combine that knowledge with the wisdom from the Gap and the Gain, and you can pause, celebrate your WINS, and keep looking for your GAINS. As Nelson Mandela so succinctly put it, “I never lose, I either win or learn.” If my blog has helped you in any way, please comment below. I love to hear from readers.

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How to Ditch the Scale For Improved Results

This post may be one of the hardest I have tried to write because of my love-hate relationship with the scale. As a teen, I loved when the scale number went down. And I hated the confusion that arose when, despite best efforts, it went up. Before I knew any better, I sometimes stepped on mine multiple times a day. I didn’t understand that weight can fluctuate several pounds from morning to night. Worse, I fell into the “good” and “bad” trap, sometimes getting knocked flat by a number my young brain interpreted as “too high”. (According to whom?) After decades of struggle, one day I finally realized it was time to ditch the scale.

Grizzly bear Steve at Woodland Park Zoo. Zoos use scales to assess body weight as one of many health metrics and to adjust nutrition according to life cycles. — Grizzly bear Steve at Woodland Park Zoo. Zookeepers use scales to assess body weight as one of many health metrics and to adjust nutrition according to animals’ life cycles. Human scales should come with instruction manuals.

What the Scale Measures

A typical scale measures how much mass your physical body has in earth’s gravity. Nothing more, nothing less. It cannot tell you anything about your intrinsic value, your personality or skills, or how you manage crises in the real world. A digital Tanita scale uses bioelectrical impedance to supply information about body composition, but only if the user is properly hydrated. A recent online article in Forbes estimates that 75% of Americans are chronically dehydrated. So at best, scales provide a snapshot of relative trends rather than absolutes. At worst, they can destroy delicate self-esteem, especially in teens whose bodies are changing hormonally and growing into their adult forms.

Weighing Frequency

What does a healthy relationship with the scale look like? My husband weighs daily with no obvious disordered relationship, as far as I can tell. As a trainer and coach, it seems to me that stepping on once a month at the same time of day might provide a useful reference point. While I never ask clients to weigh themselves, I do occasionally provide body fat testing as a more useful gauge of wellness. It seems to me that scales do more harm than good. Maybe that’s a reflection of who comes to me for help. Regardless, scales should come with kisage instructions on proper use.

Three obvious exceptions to my monthly guideline come to mind. If you are pregnant and concerned about gaining too much weight, then weighing once a week seems reasonable. At my Ob-GYN visits during my pregnancy, I regularly turned backward on the scale and asked my provider to let me know about anything of concern. When she mentioned that I was gaining weight too fast, I adjusted my behavior. I never needed to know the raw number.

Greater one-horned rhinoceros Glen at Woodland Park Zoo. If you know you have an unhealthy weighing habit, consider whether it's time to ditch the scale. — Greater one-horned rhinoceros Glen at Woodland Park Zoo. If you know you have an unhealthy weighing habit, consider whether it’s time to ditch the scale.

Likewise, someone recovering from severe dehydration may need to weigh more frequently to assess whether they are properly replenishing their fluids. And if someone is unable to eat (i.e. for surgery or other medical procedures) weighing more frequently for a very short time period can help the person return to stasis.

Lag Effect

What about the supposed “lag effect”? Years ago a client asked how he could climb Mt. Rainier in the heat of the summer, only to see a higher number on the scale the next day. I asked what he ate during his three-day climb. The answer: salty snack foods such as pretzels, nuts, beef jerky, chips, and so forth. Aha!

High-sodium snacks cause fluid retention, resulting in a temporary increase in scale weight. The same thing can also happen from eating FODMAPS foods or cruciferous vegetables such as cauliflower, broccoli, cabbage, and Brussels sprouts, all of which can cause bloating for some people.

Bumi, Woodland Park Zoo's male Malayan tiger. — Bumi, Woodland Park Zoo’s male Malayan tiger.

The same client stepped on the scale several days later, after resuming normal eating. He experienced what I have dubbed the “lag effect.” His weight had dropped below his baseline. Had he been on a monthly weighing routine, such microdetails would not matter. The overall trend does. It goes without saying, but if someone is hiking purely to lose weight, they may engage in harmful practices. Getting dehydrated puts them at risk of making bad decisions. Improper fueling could put their whole team in jeopardy.

Ditch the Scale; Use Common Sense

If you ate too much the previous day, you already know it. What will you gain by seeing a scale number? And really, so what? Today is a new day. Your goal should be to ensure that you make better choices. If you feel like you are dehydrated, you don’t need permission from a scale to drink more water. When did we lose trust in ourselves? Who says Up equals Bad, while Down means Good? The media. Have you given away your power, mood, and choices to an inanimate $50 box? If so, how’s that going for you?

The author for scale next to a model T-Rex, Woodland Park Zoo summer 2021. — The author standing next to a model T-Rex, Woodland Park Zoo summer 2021. An appropriate use of “scale.”

Important Questions to Ask Yourself

If you use a scale more often than monthly, ask yourself these questions:

WHY do you get on it? Curiosity? Punishment? Habit? Interest in trends? Did someone tell you to?
WHAT other ways might you gauge today’s health and wellness? Sleep quality? Mood? Alertness? Appetite?
WHAT will you gain by knowing today’s number? Can you skip without consequences?
WILL seeing an unexpected number impact your mood or negatively influence your choices? If so, give yourself a pass. Gauge your progress in other ways.

Water Lily and Guadalupe enjoying a swim at Woodland Park Zoo.

How to Gauge Progress If You Ditch the Scale

The best ways to gauge progress without using a scale are:

Clothing fit – are your favorite clothes tight? That may be a sign to reduce intake or increase movement. Try to remember that building lean muscle mass may change how clothes fit.
Appearance — especially in a photograph. People with an unhealthy relationship to the scale tend to have a skewed impression of their bodies. Looking in the mirror won’t change that but looking at a photograph may. You can also ask for feedback from trusted loved ones.

Glen and Taj, Woodand Park Zoo's greater one-horned rhinos, enjoying a swim. What would happen if you ditch the scale this summer? — Glen and Taj, Woodand Park Zoo’s greater one-horned rhinos, enjoying a swim. Can you ditch the scale this summer?

Bodyfat measurements – use a tape measure to record dimensions around the chest, hips, and waist. Repeat every three months.
Appetite — do you feel like eating everything around you? You may be missing key nutrients. Do you hate the thought of eating or hide your eating from others? If so, it may be time to talk to a trusted professional who can help you manage your thoughts and build new habits.
Mood — list five things you love about yourself. Keep track of affirmations that work for you. Incorporate other stress-relieving methods to help your body become its best self. And use a relative mood scale (the kind I recommend!) ranging from 1 (lousy) to 10 (awesome). That way, you can work on your whole self, both emotionally and physically.

Above all else, remember that thoughts are merely thoughts. You can learn to take control of them. If you get rid of your scale, you remove its power and start trusting yourself. If you have strategies for measuring improvement you’d like to share, please comment below. I’d love to hear how others have handled “the box of shame.”

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How to Prevent Foot Discomfort for Hikers

A client and blog reader recently asked for tips to manage foot and ankle pain before and during hikes. Below are seven strategies to prevent foot discomfort, set against recent photographs of a hike to Olallie and Talapus Lakes.

A beautiful mid-week summer day at Talapus Lake.

Prepare for Uneven Terrain

Nothing beats physical preparation. To help prepare for the challenges of uneven terrain, incorporate single-leg balance exercises into your training routine. With some knowledge, you can train in the privacy of your own home with limited equipment. A challenging move I have been recommending for clients for the past twenty-five years is the one-legged deadlift. No need for fancy balance gimmicks or expensive gym memberships.

Ajax heads across the log bridge between Olallie Lake and Exit 47 along the I-90 Corridor.

Choose Proper Footwear

Authors have written entire books on this, so I only offer a few pointed suggestions. On Body Results’ website, I present questions about proper running shoes. But you can ask similar questions about your hiking boots. Consider trying orthotics or inserts such as Superfeet. They provide arch support or cushion for repeat days of hiking. Backpackers may find it helpful to have a pair of lightweight “camp shoes” to change into once they finish hiking for the day. These tips focus on preventing your feet from being locked into one position.

I prevent foot discomfort by wearing my favorite pair of trail shoes with a lightweight liner and pair of midweight wool socks.

Stretch and Strengthen to Prevent Foot Discomfort

On the GMB website JC Deen shares an ankle-stretching article with four exercises to combat stiff ankles. Another great movement for healthy lower body extremities is the ankle rocker. If you are hyper-mobile or you tend to roll your ankles, plan to strengthen your feet and calves to shore up vulnerable areas. Balance training such as the one-legged deadlift or step ups and step downs can help. Bring a lightweight ankle wrap as part of a first aid kit if you anticipate needing additional support.

Prevent Foot Discomfort by Caring for Your Fascia

Foam rollers are great to have in your gym, not only for rolling out tightness in the calves but also for maintaining healthy hips and back. Half-rollers can provide additional opportunities for balance training. Small, portable porcupine balls are great for backpacking. Rolling the soles of the feet over a knobby reflexology ball (ranging in size from golf ball to softball) can help release knots or trigger points. They can also help desensitize overly sensitive feet. If you have access to a sports massage therapist, they can help get at the root of what is causing tightness and pain. Finally, a group called The Human Garage offers a video for the self-care of ankle fascia.

Ajax cooling off his tootsies and quenching his thirst at the same time.

Include Variety

In an article I wrote years ago for the Body Results website, Numb Feet: Cause and Cures, I suggest varying foot positions on aerobic machines to prevent or limit numbness and tingling. Likewise, whenever you find yourself on an unrelenting slope (uphill or downhill) give your feet a break every so often. Try side-stepping, taking a few serpentine (zigzag) steps, smaller or larger strides, or even going backward for a short stint. Take a side trail to a viewpoint. Change the tightness or looseness of boot laces. Play with sock layering and sock thickness. Stop at that lake or stream and soak your feet in the cool water for a few minutes.

A friend makes her way across a stream crossing as we head toward Olallie and Talapus Lakes. One helpful tip to fix your feet is to take advantage of flowing water and soak them as needed during a break. — A friend makes her way across a stream crossing as we head toward Olallie and Talapus Lakes from Exit 47. Take advantage of the cold stream or lake water and soak your feet during a break.

Realign Electrical Energy to Prevent Foot Discomfort

To help realign your electrical energy at home or on the trail, take off your shoes and connect with the bare earth, an exercise called grounding. Barefoot walking on concrete, asphalt, or pavement doesn’t count (and blacktop on a hot day can scorch raw feet!), but walking on beach sand, river banks, grass, or soil all do. Swimming in the ocean, a lake, or a river counts, as well. Even sitting in the shade on a hot summer day for five or ten minutes without shoes on can help you discharge built-up energy. It might even help you reduce inflammation. But best of all, after a long day of hiking getting out of those boots feels great.

Polar Bear Plunge in Lake Washington, January 1, 2021. Talk about refreshing! Grounding doesn't have to be this extreme. — Polar Bear Plunge in Lake Washington, January 1, 2021. Talk about refreshing! Grounding doesn’t have to be this extreme.

Fixing Your Feet

One final resource for all things feet is John Vonhoff’s book, Fixing your Feet: Injury Prevention and Treatment for Athletes. And if nothing above fixes your problems, contact a podiatrist who might be able to help identify alignment issues or neurological problems, start you on a path toward overcoming plantar fasciitis or bunions, suggest appropriate support, or even recommend surgery. But do not give up hiking. There is help! Find the right solution for you, whether you are dealing with blisters, bunions, corns, or worse. The better your feet feel, the more enjoyment you will get on the trail.

Grounding is perfect for any season. This was taken in February, 2021 during a particularly rainy time when patches of our yard had standing water.

In late fall I shared a blog post about narrowly escaping injury in the Alpine Lakes wilderness. Injury in the mountains is always a remote possibility. But proper preparation, knowledge of your body, and safe practices (including making sure someone knows where you are) can all help alleviate worry.

I have even gone so far as using duct tape on my heels in a pair of boots I knew always caused blisters. I have since replaced that pair of boots, but I always have duct tape available just in case. Do you have a particular strategy for managing foot discomfort? Share your tips (and spread your knowledge!) in the comments box.

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Rising Strong Lesson: The Story I’m Telling Myself

In her book, Rising Strong, Brene Brown uses a powerful phrase that resonates as much for me as advice from the Gap and the Gain (see recent blog posts). Brown, a shame researcher, talks about falling down and finding the courage to “rumble” or reset ourselves and get back up again. Anytime we feel exceedingly vulnerable when asking for what we need, she suggests using the phrase: The story I’m telling myself… I have already used her line a number of times in the past few weeks, with positive results.

Lemurs in Madagascar provide the perfect backdrop for "rising strong" as these remarkable primates are tree dwellers. — Lemurs in Madagascar provide the perfect backdrop for “rising strong” as these remarkable primates are tree dwellers.

Brene Brown’s Lake Travis Story

As an example of how this line works, Brown shares a story about swimming in Lake Travis with her husband Steve. In it, she tries several times to connect with him on a deep, spiritual level, without getting the desired response. The fiction she creates is that she’s slow. He doesn’t like how she looks in her Speedo. Or he no longer feels the same connection toward her after years of marriage.

Meanwhile, his own story involves dwelling on a recent nightmare about losing the kids in a boating accident. While he is preoccupied with trying to remain the strong, capable man she wants him to be, she’s trying to connect. When they finally talk about it later, she uses the phrase, “The story I’m telling myself…” It signals that she feels vulnerable and tentative, and may have created a false narrative. They both share their own interpretation of the moment. As a result, they weather the rough spot with greater understanding and appreciation for each other.

Another master climber. They make it look so incredibly effortless. — The sifakas are masterful climbers. They make it look so incredibly effortless.

A Tool for Reframing Your Story

Brown’s story unlocked something for me. I tend to avoid confrontation. I also realize that I get stuck in black-and-white, all-or-nothing thinking, or even partial truths. Brown’s phrase is empowering. Using it allows me to take ownership of the narrative I’m telling myself and voice it aloud. By sharing it with the other person, I can learn whether my story is close or if I have completely missed the mark.

I’ve used this with my daughter and husband. Each time, I’ve gained more clarity and learned how often the story I’m concocting is partly incorrect. Imagine having one tool that could help us clear up misunderstandings. This reframing phrase is becoming that tool.

A sifaka mom with a baby clutched to her stomach.

An Example of Rising Strong

As an illustration, one of the opportunities I had to use the phrase revolves around my expectations. I expect when I make an appointment, the person will be ready for me. Last week that didn’t happen. The story I told myself was that I didn’t matter, that I was “less important” than whatever else was going on. Or worse, I was simply forgotten.

On using the line with myself and digging deeper with self-compassion and an openness to learning, I realized not only was I wrong, but the problem was NOT between the two of us, but steeped in technology. My phone has had issues sending and receiving texts. Since the other person texts almost exclusively, we kept missing each other. The new, true story was “My technology needs updating.” That immediately led to owning and discussing the problem, apologizing, finding a better way to confirm appointments, backing up data on my old phone, and ordering a new one. We both experienced a win-win and kept our relationship intact.

Indri singing in the rain. Their haunting calls resonate for miles in the rainforest canopy. If only we could communicate the same way, without needing all the high-tech gizmos and gadgets!

What Resources Have Helped You?

We have explored a number of tools for change in the past six months, including KISAGE (keeping it simple and good enough), focusing on the GAIN rather than the GAP, and finding joy everywhere.

If you have found it helpful to learn about resources we’ve shared that energize, educate, or shift something within you, please comment below. Better yet, if you know of books or websites that have helped YOU on your journey through change, I would love to hear about them. Perhaps one will be featured and discussed in upcoming posts.

Rising Strong into Year Two

I am gearing up for a second year of blog posts (Yo.u know who you are — thanks for your encouragement!) What resonates most with you? My ideas going forward include advice from author and life coach Tama Kieves. Precision Nutrition takeaway tips. Kristin Neff on Self-Compassion. Brene Brown’s many books. And of course, I’ll continue to share adventures with Ajax.

Rise strong with me into year two. Do you know of others who could benefit from the tips in this blog? Help me grow my subscriber list by forwarding it!

During our visit to Lemur Island, near Andasibe in Madagascar, we got to feed ripe bananas to these friendly little brown lemurs. An example of unexpected joy, for sure!

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Solo Hiking: Nine Ways It Enhances Your Freedom

Several weeks ago on Tiger Mountain, a pair of women stopped to ask me a few questions about my experience of solo hiking as a female. Did I feel comfortable hiking with only my dog as a companion? (Yes.) Did he give me a sense of safety and security in bear country? (Definitely.) Would I be hiking if I didn’t have him around? (Not as much.) What hikes would I recommend for women hiking by themselves? (All the ones listed on my Blog.) Such questions got me thinking about nine ways solo hiking enhances my freedom and joy.

Solo hiking with Ajax allows me to set my own pace, rest as long (or short) as I want, explore side routes, and change destination on a whim. Solo hiking is the ultimate in freedom.

Enhancing Freedom

Planning a hike requires checking on roads and routes to and from your destination (including obtaining the necessary forest passes or parking permits). It also involves researching the weather, knowing what gear, food, and clothing you will need, and making sure you have the appropriate skills. The more people in your group, the harder it is sometimes for everyone to agree. Solo hiking provides the ultimate freedom.

Start and end whenever you want. I am the only early bird in my family, and I hate burning daylight. When I plan trips with other people — including hiking partners, friends, or family — I nearly always end up waiting. One of my very favorite things about hiking solo is getting up without an alarm (sometimes as early as 4:30 a.m.) and heading out the door. All Ajax needs is a bowl of kibble and he’s ready to go.

The view overlooking I-90 from the gravel trail headed toward Change Peak. We saw four people in the six hours we were out hiking.

Change destination on a whim. Sometimes I plan to do a particular hike but change my mind at the last minute. Last week on Mt. Washington, Ajax and I had perfect cool weather at 6:30 a.m., and after reaching the summit around nine, we descended a different way that allowed us to add a few miles exploring Change Peak to the east. As long as I alert my husband to my estimated return time and the approximate area I’ll be hiking, we explore as much as we want.

Set an independent pace. Solo hiking is the ultimate exercise in identifying your pace. I like to be first on a path so Ajax can travel off-leash on the trip up. I can always tell from cobwebs tickling my face if we are first on the route. At the summit, whenever the mosquitoes become annoying, we don’t have to wait for everyone else; we simply pack up and leave. If we want to stop for photos or grab a snack, no problem. We can go as fast or as slow as we like.

About the only downside of solo hiking is there's nobody around to snap your photograph. Fortunately, selfies are possible with cell phones, and DSLRs allow outside-the-box creativity such as shadow shots. — About the only downside of solo hiking is there’s nobody around to snap your photograph. Fortunately, selfies are possible with cell phones, and DSLRs allow outside-the-box creativity such as shadow shots.

Unexpected Benefits of Solo Hiking

Sometimes I absolutely adore hiking with a close friend, particularly one on the same wavelength with whom I can share deep, philosophical conversations (you know who you are!) Other times, I celebrate being on the trail alone. Why the difference?

Enhance senses. Whenever I hike alone, I pay a lot more attention to the birdsong, shadows, lighting, breeze, temperature, and loamy, earthy smells. Even my protein shake and trail mix taste better in the mountains. Solo hiking often results in far better photos, because I can take my time. And I am more attuned to how Ajax is doing, since he is the only one with me.

Beargrass tufts in the full sun of Chance Peak.

Become self-reliant. In today’s fast-paced and high-tech world where everyone is a specialist, sometimes it feels like there is no room for a generalist such as myself. Solo hiking allows me to return to basics and trust myself in a way that I do not in the city. It provides me with a way to get in touch with my roots, akin to gardening or forest bathing.
Meet strangers who become friends. One of my most memorable hikes the past year started as a solo hike with Ajax along the Kendall Katwalk. I met someone who turned into a client and blog follower (you know who you are!) He challenges me with philosophical insights I would never have had without joining forces on the trail. When you are hiking as part of a group, however, such an opportunity might never present itself.

Solo Hiking Provides Carry-over Into Life

Finally, solo hiking enhances freedom in my daily life, by relieving stress, providing a channel for creative problem solving, and allowing me ways to safely explore new areas.

Relieve stress. Nothing else gives me as much relief from stress as solo hiking. When I am in the mountains with Ajax, I have zero responsibilities other than taking care of the two of us. We go at our own pace, do exactly what we want, and enjoy nature with mindfulness and freedom.

Ajax at the base of the Great Wall on Mt. Washington.

Channel creative problem-solving. Over the past year, whenever I feel stuck (in my blog or creative writing, or even my client work) I set an intention to “mull” over the current problem on my next hike. I’ve started to do the same in town if I can’t spare a half-day. Traveling with a pack has become a form of walking meditation.
Explore new areas. Mother Nature has provided numerous trails in the Pacific Northwest. I can bring my wanderlust to city walks with Ajax, by taking familiar routes in a reverse direction or exploring streets I’ve never been down before. A win for the brain!

Cushiony pine and moss trail down the Great Wall route, a welcome break from the rocky, gravely normal route.

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How to Improve Communication: Reduce Complaining

This past weekend, my husband and I were discussing how ubiquitous complaining has become. I suddenly realized how often I complain to my journal. Frequently unconsciously. My husband whipped out one of his gems. “The quality of the language we use dictates the quality of the communication we have with ourselves and others.” I vowed to improve communication by trying to stop — or reduce — my complaining. Easier said than done.

Whether we are giving directions to a lovely international waterfall, persuading someone to do something for us, or complaining, "The quality of the language we use dictates the quality of the communication." We can always improve communication. — Whether we are giving directions to a lovely hidden waterfall, persuading someone to do something for us, or complaining, “The quality of the language we use dictates the quality of the communication.” We can always work to improve communication.

What Is Complaining?

In simplest terms, complaining is a way to express pain, dissatisfaction, or resentment. Sometimes I complain in my journal to process something that is not going well. That way nobody ever has to hear it. According to Dr. Travis Bradberry, complaining — in any form — is awful for our health. He says that the more we complain, the more negative we become.

Complaining can result from a comparison (oops!). I often hear people say they don’t have enough (time, money, fame, beauty, etc.) or too much (weight, work, pain, stress, people relying on them, etc.) If you’ve been following my blog over the past month, you may recall what Dan Sullivan says about comparison (in The Gap and The Gain). It’s a sure way to get stuck in the GAP.

The main -- and only -- steep "highway" to the east coast of Madagascar out of the capital city Antananarivo. If a truck stalls or has a flat (a common occurrence on this road) traffic backs up for kilometers as it turns into a one-lane road. Still think you have it hard? — The main — and only — steep “highway” to the east coast of Madagascar out of the capital city Antananarivo. If a truck stalls or has a flat (a common occurrence on this road) traffic backs up for kilometers as it turns into a one-lane road. Still think you have it hard?

“Repeated complaining rewires your brain to make future complaining more likely,” Bradberry points out. “Over time, you find it’s easier to be negative than to be positive, regardless of what’s happening around you. Complaining becomes your default behavior, which changes how people perceive you.”

Once we start a complaining habit, it becomes harder to change. I’ve taken it on as my next challenge. (As if I don’t have enough to work on already. Oops, see that? Another complaint. Dagnabbit!)

Stop Complaining to Improve Communication

Now that we know how awful complaining is for our health and relationships, how can we become more positive? Below are some suggestions. The original list comes from psychologists Scott Bea and Susan Albers at Health Essentials.

Typical work conditions in Madagascar. These gentlemen were working with molten liquid without protective footwear, eyewear, or even mitts. I will never again complain about work conditions in the US. — Typical work conditions in a metal factory in Madagascar. These gentlemen were pouring molten ore without protective footwear, eyewear, or hand coverings. I will never again complain about work conditions in the US.

Six Strategies to Reduce Complaining

Choose the right audience — Most of the world couldn’t care less. (Or worse, they may get so annoyed that they start avoiding you). Look for one appropriate person — a close friend or colleague, clergy or social worker — to help you brainstorm options for change
Clarify intent — Ask yourself if this issue really matters that much to you. If so, write about it in private with the goal of finding a solution
Complaint sandwich — Just like we use in my writing groups when delivering critiques, say something positive, voice your critique/complaint, and end with another positive.

Gamify — Increase your awareness of when you’re complaining by remaining playful. Try saying aloud, “Oops, there I go again, better change my strategy.” Keep it lighthearted rather than self-critical or judgmental.
Gratitude — Whenever you become aware of your need to complain, stop. Think about what’s good about the current situation. This will allow you to return to the GAIN rather than the GAP.
Time limit — ANY complaining causes “neurons that fire together, wire together,” suggests Bradberry. If you can CATCH yourself, limit your complaining time to, under a minute. Then switch to a more productive problem-solving mode.

Approaching a busy city. Main roads in Madagascar are few and heavily used by all - zebu cattle, bikes, pedestrians, and what few transport vehicles there are, heavily laden with passengers and possessions. — Approaching a busy city. Main roads in Madagascar are few and heavily used by all – zebu cattle, bikes, pedestrians, and what few transport vehicles there are, heavily laden with passengers and possessions.

Benefits of Kicking the Habit

The faster you jump out of the complaining habit, the better. Like any habit, it can be changed. It is a skill you can develop. Like any skill, it requires a beginner’s mindset, awareness, and practice.

Think of people you spend most of your time with. Do any of them complain all the time? Can you limit how much time you spend with them? Try surrounding yourself with positive people. Observe what they do. The more you can train your brain to focus on the positives, rather than the negatives, the more joy you will find.

As always, I’d love to hear from you. Do you have any aha moments around complaining? Have you tried any useful strategies to increase your awareness? Share them in the comments section.

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Beginner’s Mindset: How to Maintain One for Optimal Fun

On Father’s Day my husband, daughter, and I went on three different outings: disc golf, pickleball, and birding. All three are mild physical activities, done outside, and requiring different skillsets. They also provided me with a wonderful insight into how important it is to maintain a beginner’s mindset for optimal fun.

My daughter prepares to launch a javelin, a high-skills Field event that requires a ton of work and training to master. — My daughter prepares to launch a javelin, a high-skills Field event that requires a ton of hard work and training to master.

Disc Golf Reminded Me of the Beginner’s Mindset

We started with a “practice hole” at North Park, since our daughter had never played before. I wasn’t sure how my wrist would do. My first throw went perpendicular to the intended direction. I have zero control. I’ll have to throw leftie. Unfortunately, I pitched the next disc into the street. Mortified, I considered walking the tiny course as a spectator. Not once did I think, With my injured wrist, it’s like I am a complete novice. Better change strategies.

Meanwhile, my husband (who played a lot of golf and disc golf in the past) hit the chain basket in par 3. Mine took twelve. I used to be able to throw way harder and farther. Why bother? I can’t win; I can’t even compete. My wonky throwing will only slow us down.

Comparison Squashes Fun

Uh oh. You can see where this is headed. To quote Lost in Space, season 1 episode 10, “Danger, Will Robinson!” I fell prey to comparing, competing, and creating faulty expectations. When would a novice — injured at that — ever beat someone skilled? I was asking all the wrong questions. I’d fully succumbed to GAP thinking. (If this is new to you, please see previous posts about Dan Sullivan’s book, the Gap and the Gain.)

As my daughter linked her arm through mine and we returned to start the first hole “for real,” I quickly constructed a new narrative with different goals: be outside, share a new experience with my family, practice throwing straight, and improve from the previous hole.

For the next few holes, as my husband continued with par 3’s, I focused on my own efforts. When my score dropped from 12 to 8 and then 7, and I straightened out the disc’s flight path, I smiled. I was learning. I was improving. This was fun. When we left, I wanted to keep playing. We’d arrived in the Gain.

Disc golf combines elements of urban bushwacking, frisbee, and golf. I used my left hand and told myself anything under 15 throws per hole I'd consider a win. Beginner's mindset: just have fun and learn something new. — Disc golf combines elements of urban bushwacking, frisbee, and golf. I used my left hand and told myself anything under 15 throws per hole I’d consider a win. Beginner’s mindset: just have fun and learn something new.

Pickleball and Lack of a Beginner’s Mindset

Second, we tried pickleball, something none of us had played before. I’d never even heard of it until a hiking buddy (CW!) and writing partner (AC!) both mentioned playing. My racquet experiences extended to squash, ping pong, badminton, and tennis, but the whiffle balls don’t bounce much and take some getting used to. We watched a two-minute video on the basics and set out to play with our brand-new equipment.

As with disc golf, I tried using both hands. This time, I could hit with the right, but each contact sent a zing up my wrist. Good rehab, I convinced myself. My husband played on one side, and my daughter and I teamed up on the other. Our only goal was to try it out, kind of like we hit the badminton birdie in our backyard with no net.

Competition Reduces the Joy

After we’d volleyed for a few minutes, laughing about the short racquets and balls that don’t bounce, a kind stranger approached and offered to teach us the rules. A fourth! Why not? Unfortunately, this meant fewer opportunities for each of us to hit, and that darn competition thing returned. My daughter got frustrated and left, while my husband and I stayed a few more minutes, hoping to pick up a few useful tips. “Dinking” turned competitive; fun morphed into work.

When we finally located our daughter hanging out by a stream, she said she’d be happy to try disc golf again, but not pickleball. At least not if we’re going to repeat what had just happened. The lesson, at least in our family: competing before you have mastered basic competencies reduces the joy.

Birding and Chasing a Rarity

Our final adventure of the day was to Marymoor Park in Redmond to try to spot a rare species, the blue grosbeak, which had only been seen north of Oregon three times in Ebird.org‘s recorded history. Birding is a solitary endeavour — you generally don’t want scores of people disturbing the birds you want to see — yet when there are rarities in the area, it can become quite a social event.

Blue grosbeak, a bird species that has only been spotted north of Oregon three times in the history of tracking it. My husband is a Master Birder whereas I am an advanced beginner. I think I would continue to learn more if I maintained a beginner's mindset. — Blue grosbeak in Marymoor Park. I have more fun learning when I can maintain a beginner’s mindset.

My husband is a Master Birder through Seattle Audubon. He also has countless hours of practice with a 500mm lens, taking photos of birds in flight. Here, I knew from the outset what my expectations were: Spot the blue grosbeak. Secondary? Get a photo. Hard enough since birds are wild and unpredictable.

I also knew there would be dozens of other birders with far more experience looking for the same bird. In this case, it would help me to get a glimpse. I simply went along for the ride to absorb whatever knowledge everyone else shared. The result? I enjoy birding with people who know a lot more than I do. While I can maintain a beginner’s mindset, I can also help teach any others who know less about it than I do. Win-win.

The Take-away Lessons

Today’s ramblings reminded me of four key points:

For optimal fun, whimsy and play, maintain a beginner’s mindset
Establish realistic expectations, as that leads to staying in the Gain
Compete only with yourself, while you establish basic competencies, or risk squelching your joy
Learning can be challenging. For optimal learning, cultivate a beginner’s mindset

If there is something you have wanted to try, explore it with a playful, childlike, and curious mindset. Find someone who can guide you in a gentle, non-competitive way. Give yourself permission to be a complete novice, without judgment or embarrassment. Share your experience in the blog comments. And as we approach Blog posts 45-50, if you have topics you would love to have me explore, please suggest them.

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How to Reign in Your Inner Critic Through Journaling

Last week I shared a blog post about getting massive leverage on ourselves. Below, I share a journaling technique that helped me get through the first week of breaking an old habit. The exercise may seem esoteric or woo-woo, but it has helped me tap into wisdom I never knew I had. It has made for a few memorable journal entries over the past decade. It can help you reign in your inner critic and understand how that voice in your head is trying to help.

My dog thinks the world of me. My inner critic? Not so much. Try this technique to reign in your inner critic.

Inviting Your Inner Critic

You don’t need to be a writer to take advantage of this technique. Every person is creative. (I was even secretary for three years for a writer’s group in Edmonds with that name, EPIC Group Writers.) If you already are a writer or have toyed with keeping a journal at any point, you may take to this naturally.

All you need are some colored markers, pencils, or ink pens, and some paper, bound in a journal or loose is up to you. You may find it more fun to do this by hand rather than on a computer, and the paper can be lined or unlined if you want to doodle, draw, or even scrapbook.

Raging waterfall on the hike to Annette Lake.

Find a comfortable place where you can relax and get curious, preferably someplace you won’t be disturbed for at least ten or fifteen minutes. That could be in your parked car, on a bench in a green space, on a trail in the mountains, on a towel on a beach, or curled up in your bedroom. Someplace comfortable, soothing, familiar.

Finally, have some issue in mind that has you conflicted. In my case, on day eight of “Operation Stifle Sweet-tooth”, my inner critic spoke up, demanding chocolate. The very day I was scheduled to visit Annette Lake with a friend. I’d signed a contract with myself that if I had any chocolate at any point before my hike, I would have to cancel with my hiking partner. What could I do?

Meet Gooky, My Inner Critic

Many years ago, I playfully named my inner critic “Gooky”, a cross between “gremlin” and “cookie.” She’s a little green gremlin that perches on my left shoulder and, as close as I can tell, she’s me at age six — a whiner who wants sweets all the time, who wants to skip exercise and read all day, and who loves to laugh but can’t tell a joke to save her life — blended with the harshest critic imaginable.

You know the type. We all have one. Gooky insists that I will never amount to much as a writer, that everything I put out into the world is garbage, that I don’t know what I’m talking about, and that being sugar-free and gluten-free is totally boring, painful, and stupid.

Have you named yours yet? Try it. Befriend them. It’s a hoot.

Instead of giving in, I pulled out a writing technique I used about a decade ago when I suffered from plantar fasciitis. Right after our previous dog, Emily, died, I dialogued with five body parts clamoring for attention. A veritable cacophony.

This time was much simpler, just me and Gooky. Gooky’s words usually get green ink. My calm, in-control, adult self gets purple.

My reward for staying clear of chocolate for eight days was hiking with a close friend. As soon as I came up with that part of my contract, I knew I wouldn't break my promise. However, I didn't realize Gooky would test me the morning of our hike. — My reward for staying clear of chocolate for eight days was hiking with a close friend. As soon as I came up with that part of my contract, I knew I wouldn’t break my promise. However, I didn’t realize Gooky would test me the morning of our hike.

While I won’t include the entire exchange, a portion is below. The key to using this technique is to listen closely and try to understand the other voice, almost like you’re facing them in the opposite chair.

The Dialogue Begins

ME: Okay, Gooky, I hear that you’re asking for chocolate before today’s hike. We talked about this. Remember the pact we made, that if we went for a whole week, we’d get to hike with our friend today?

G: Yup. We did it. Bring chocolate.

ME: But then I have to show that awful picture on my blog, because the entire commitment was until July 31.

G: Then bring the Whoop strap.

Encountering Surprises

This comment Gooky made through my pen had me puzzled. What on earth do a biometric device and chocolate have in common, and why did my inner critic want data about the hike? So, I asked.

ME: What, exactly, do you want?

G: Proof.

Again, I remained clueless. I didn’t know where these thoughts were coming from. I asked again.

ME: I don’t understand. Can you explain more?

G: Proof that we’re still awesome. I need a reward.

Dew-covered foxglove on the trail several years ago. Do pretty flowers appeal to six-year-olds? Sometimes. — Dew-covered foxglove on the trail to Mt. Washington several years ago. Do pretty flowers appeal to six-year-olds? Sometimes.

Aha. My six-year-old self equated eating chocolate with awesome fun and worry-free times, and she equated the Whoop with our many hikes the past two years where we went farther, faster, higher. She saw chocolate and positive biometric feedback as rewards for hard work. Suddenly, I realized what this was about. It was NOT about the chocolate. It never was.

Ending an Exchange

ME: (gently) We are awesome. We don’t need proof. Isn’t hiking with a friend reward enough?

G: You always share too much.

ME: Only with people I trust, who won’t betray my confidence. And with you. You’re a part of me. You’ve been a big help in the past. But I need to let go of some of the habits that don’t help us anymore, so we can move on to the next level. But I know you’re always there when I need you. Okay?

By her silence, I knew I had appeased the critic. I proceeded to the car — without chocolate — and had a wonderful time with my hiking buddy. As Gooky’s “reward” I took mixed nuts with a few dates and some string cheese so she wouldn’t get hungry in the car. She has been silent since Tuesday.

Log waterfall on the trail to Annette Lake.

Take-Away Messages

I certainly don’t suggest sharing your dialogues with the world as I am doing. I am not schizophrenic but yes, I do hear a voice in my head. My dialogue was a perfect illustration of how this technique works and what one might learn using it. Consider checking back in with yours periodically to see what insights you gain.

If you prefer talking out loud to writing, place a chair in front of you and physically switch seats back and forth as you dialogue with your inner critic. Some actors and writers use this exercise to “get into a role.” Do whatever allows you to tap into the most authentic you.

But most importantly, have fun with it. Befriend it. Understand it. Your inner critic is trying its very best to protect you with the tools at its disposal. The more you can listen, the more you can move forward with everyone on board instead of at odds.

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How to Get Massive Leverage On Yourself to Change

Earlier this week, a critique partner said I should share a post describing what helped me change some of my bad habits. Aware that being so publicly vulnerable would be stressful and cathartic at the same time, I accepted her suggestion (thanks, CC). Are you ready to make some sort of huge change? Then read on to learn how to get massive leverage on yourself.

Think of change as a series of stepping stones. You cannot cross any river (metaphorical or actual) without taking the first step. What is the first step you need to take to get massive leverage on yourself?

Are You Ready to Change?

In order to change any habit and make it stick, you need to meet the following criteria:

Be RAW – Ready, Able, and Willing — to change
Know what behavior you want to get rid of and what to replace it with
Have a supportive community
Make it so keeping the old habit becomes more painful than building a new one

Change is uncomfortable. Evidence of change to an ecosystem: beaver activity at Magnuson Park.

Massive Leverage Tip 1: RAW — Ready, Able, Willing

I borrowed a phrase from Precision Nutrition and tweaked their order to make it easier to remember (remember KISAGE? I adore acronyms!) Change is uncomfortable. It requires mindfulness, instead of being on auto-pilot, and it involves paying attention to what you are doing. Are you READY, ABLE, and WILLING (RAW) to change? If you are not open to experiencing discomfort, you aren’t ready. If you don’t have support, you will not be able to get through the discomfort. And if you are not in the right mindset, or if you are too attached to the bad habit, you will not be willing to let go.

Going Gluten-free

To share an example of how this worked for me, seven years ago we brought our pup Ajax home. A few days later, I got badly congested and went through several boxes of tissues. We tried using air purifiers, dusting, vacuuming, and brushing the dog, with little success. I didn’t want to depend on allergy medicine for the next fifteen years, so through trial and error, I finally learned that his dander had overwhelmed my immune system.

We would either have to find him another home or I’d have to eliminate another trigger: gluten. I loved our new dog so much that I was READY, ABLE, and WILLING to do anything to keep him. I have been gluten-free and sniffle-free ever since. He is one of the brightest lights in my life and I would make the same decision again in a second.

Ajax at eight weeks. Love at first sight. I would have done just about anything to keep him. I was Ready, Able, and Willing to give up gluten to keep my dog and have been allergy-free ever since. — Ajax at eight weeks. Love at first sight. I would have done just about anything to keep him. I was Ready, Able, and Willing to give up gluten to keep my dog and I have been allergy-free ever since.

Tip 2: Replace Bad Habits with Good Habits

I learned from experience that any habit you remove gets filled with another. Unless you are mindful of what you want to replace it with, you may end up with more bad habits that can become even worse than the original.

Sometimes bad habits develop as coping mechanisms until we develop new skills. As a shy kid, I used to bite my nails. When I decided I was sick of my mangled fingernails, I replaced nail-biting with gum chewing. That led to expensive dental repairs. I switched to diet beverages, partly to avoid extra calories but mostly because I hated the taste of plain water. When I realized how much of our recycling bin was taken up by plastic, aluminum, and glass beverage containers, I got really disgusted with my negative contribution to the environment.

Something had to change.

Saying you want to stop eating sugar is a start. To get massive leverage, look at when and why you eat sugar and think about what you could replace it with instead, or you may trade one bad habit for another. — Saying you want to stop eating sugar is a start. To get massive leverage, look at *when* and *why* you eat sugar and think about *what* you could replace it with instead, or you may trade one bad habit for another.

Freedom from Artificial Sweeteners

I tried a dozen times to stop my beverage habit. When lesions that needed surgery appeared on my skin, I visited a naturopathic doctor who asked about my artificial sweeteners habit. Diet Coke. Diet Peach Snapple. Pretty much diet anything. She said, “A little bit of rat poison is still rat poison.” In my mind, I linked fake sweeteners to skin cancer and worse, which became the massive leverage I needed.

The moment I walked out of her office, I poured the stash of diet peach Snapple I had in the car right down the drain. I have been free from artificial sweeteners for over a decade. The point is this: identifying a habit you want to change is a start. However, you must replace it with a good habit. Otherwise, you may just be trading one bad habit for another.

There is no "bad food" but there are bad habits and "triggers". Everything in moderation is a reasonable idea, but since sugar is so insidious, for me what worked best is elimination. When others have sweet treats, I focus on fruit or foods that are acceptable within my unique eating plan. — There is no “bad food” but there *are* bad habits and “triggers”. Everything in moderation is a reasonable idea, but since sugar is so insidious, *for me* what worked best is elimination. When others have sweet treats, I focus on fruit or foods that are acceptable within my unique eating plan.

Massive Leverage Tip 3: Have a Supportive Community

Enlist the help of a family member, a mentor, a medical professional, or a close friend – or maybe all of the above — to make lasting change. This might take the form of an accountability partner. Such a person knows what you want to do, checks in with you frequently to cheer you on, acts as a sounding board if you struggle, and supports you in hard times. Find a hiking buddy (thanks for the suggestion, TO!), writing partner (thanks for our walk-and-talks, JG!) or mentor (hurrah, EHT!) so you have people in your circle who are vested in your success. By sharing what you are trying to do, you commit beyond yourself. That commitment is much harder to break.

Freedom from Sugar

In July of 2019, I gave up sugar and maintained “sugar sobriety” for over two years. Of every bad habit I have had to let go of, giving up sugar — a substance that is ubiquitous, and more addictive than cocaine — was the hardest. I never could have done it without the help from a supportive husband, a nutrition advisor, my naturopath, and several key hiking partners. Find your support system and make public your intentions.

I know now that my desire for sugar is 100% psychological. We can change our thoughts, and by extension, our habits. — I know now that my desire for chocolate is 100% psychological. We can change our thoughts, and by extension, our habits.

Tip 4: Make Old Habits More Painful Than New Ones

Following the wrist accident in February, nearly every coping strategy I had–hiking, volunteering at the zoo, writing, typing, and exercising — temporarily disappeared. The stress of making my way through my busiest season of work without use of my right hand overwhelmed me.

I relapsed.

Not in all of my bad habits, but in the most recent one I gave up in July of 2019 — specifically, chocolate. And not to the level it was before — never anything sweeter than 72% dark — but enough that I knew the signs. I was heading for trouble. A few days ago, the growing pile of evidence snapped me out of auto-pilot. I took a picture (my “ransom note”) and used the Massive Leverage approach outlined below, adapted from steps Tony Robbins brought to my attention years ago.

My relapse has presented me with this gift: it has reminded me of how much I have learned since July 2019 and how much I might help others get massive leverage on themselves.

What to Do If You Relapse

If you find that nothing else works, you may need Massive Leverage. Here’s what I did to ensure that having chocolate would be far more painful than making sugar-free choices (my replacement: frozen fruit).

Created a story in my mind that continuing on the current path would ruin everything
Promised to cancel something important to me if I broke my commitment within one week
Committed to sharing humiliating proof (my “ransom note” picture) with my blog readers if I broke my commitment before July 31; by that time the habit will have taken root and I would be free of the habit
Wrote, signed, and dated a formal contract in my journal
Shared that I had relapsed and asked for help and forgiveness from the two people closest to me
Acknowledged to myself that I had done the best I could, but I no longer needed the maladaptive tools

Today is day four. I know I can do it this time. After all, I have done it before. We are human. We do the best we can with the tools available to us. And we can remain stuck, or we can take massive steps to break bad habits. If you have had experience overcoming bad habits, please share your story or your tips in the blog comments so we can all learn and support one another.

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Focus Eating Habits on How to Eat, Not What to Eat

Many of my previous forty blog posts have delved into identifying habits or behaviors that keep us stuck and prevent us from moving forward. While many of my Body Results clients have specific outdoor goals they are pursuing, some ask me specific nutrition questions such as, “What should I eat?” or “Can you design a diet plan for me?” The answers are as diverse as the people asking them. My first suggestion is to focus on your eating habits. In other words, first focus on how to eat, not what to eat.

The Eating Habits

Before learning about the habits, please pick only ONE to play with over the next week to ten days. Trying to do them all at once will dilute your efforts and set you up for frustration and failure. I have been coaching nutrition change for about seven years now and I am still working on mastering the habits. But awareness is half the battle. Pat yourself on the back for wanting to change and then find someone who can help point out when you are making the change and when you have slipped into previous habits.

Bites of organic tropical fruit with a delectable brownie, included in our chocolate factory tour during a trip to the Galapagos Islands. No food is "bad" as long as you know how to fully savor and enjoy your food without shame or guilt. — Bites of organic tropical fruit with a delectable brownie, included in our chocolate factory tour during a trip to the Galapagos Islands. No food is “bad” as long as you know how to fully savor and enjoy your food without shame or guilt.

Between Meals

The following practices are suggestions to try before you ever take a bite.

Listen to your body’s signals for hunger. Legitimate hunger may cue you by rumbling or gurgling in your stomach. If you feel lightheaded, you may be low in blood sugar. A touch of a headache could mean either dehydration or a need for nourishment. Pay attention to your body’s cues. It is very smart. By learning what your unique physical hunger signals are, you can start to distinguish them from emotional cues.
Avoid multi-tasking at mealtime. Your goal when you eat should be to enjoy, savor, and taste your food. That is difficult to do if you are numbing yourself in front of the television, reading, scrolling through messages or cat videos on your phone, feeding the kids, driving, etc. If you are doing anything else, put off eating until you can focus on just eating.

As You Prepare a Meal

As you get ready to have a snack or meal, consider the following habits.

Make it a meal. Set the table with a bowl or plate, fork or spoon, placemat, and a napkin (even if it’s paper rather than cloth) in full view of whoever is in your household. NOT in the car. NOT standing in front of the open refrigerator. And definitely NOT hiding in a closet or bathroom or in the basement at oh-dark-thirty after everyone has gone to sleep.
Help your body rest and digest. As you get ready to sit down meal, take a deep breath, hold for a second, sip in a little more air, then slowly release to a count of eight. Do that “sipping breath” three times before you ever take a bite. Doing so creates open-regulation for the vagal nerve so that your body is in a “rest-and-digest” state rather than “fight-or-flight.” Even the most nutritious of meals will do absolutely no good if you are eating it in the car, dashing between appointments, with three screaming kids in the back seat. Nobody can digest a meal like that!

Slow Down During a Meal

Once you are legitimately hungry, focused, sitting at the table, and calm, you are ready to actually eat.

Chew thoroughly. This practice does not apply if you are consuming Gu packs at altitude on the mountain (Gu is designed for consumption when you do NOT feel up for chewing) or if you have some physical problem like dental work or a jaw wired shut, or if you have to be on a liquid diet. Otherwise, to start the digestive process, we need to chew our food well. The next bite you take, try chewing forty times before you swallow. Then think about what that experience was like. You can bet it will slow you down!
Set your spoon or fork down between bites. This is another great strategy for slowing down and allowing your body and mouth to enjoy your meal. This also gives you time to have a conversation with someone at your table instead of constantly shoveling food into your mouth.

Homemade avocado rolls and salmon rolls. My teen-aged daughter makes some great sushi and loves eating whatever she prepares.

Eat with your non-dominant hand. Since breaking my wrist in February I have had a lot of experience with this one. Now that I am trying to eat with my right hand again, I sometimes have trouble cutting with a knife and cannot fully supinate (turn the palm up) which makes using a fork tricky. But it is improving.

Keep Your Table a Guilt-free Zone

ENJOY and SAVOR your food without guilt or shame. If you really want that pint of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream, have it. Just be sure to grab a chair, sit down with a bowl, placemat, spoon, and napkin. Light a candle. If there are any cookie dough chunks, chew them forty times. Set the spoon down between bites. Guilt has no place at the dining table and will only add to your stress.

Valentine's Day treats for our daughter's classmates. While I remain gluten- and sugar-free, having baking ingredients in the house is no longer a temptation for me. That was not true as little as three years ago. — Valentine’s Day treats for our daughter’s classmates. While I remain gluten- and sugar-free (and allergy-free!), having baking ingredients in the house is no longer a temptation for me. That was not true as little as three years ago.

Eating Habits After a Meal

Hydrate between meals rather than during. In order to properly digest your food, experiment with liquid consumption outside of mealtime. Digestive enzymes help you digest your food properly; water dilutes these enzymes and might cause sub-optimal utilization of the nutrients you are trying to supply.
Learn to recognize your “satiation sigh.” Your body signals when you have had enough, usually at about 80% full. You will experience a deep sigh of satisfaction which means “stop.” The trouble is, the faster we eat, and the more unaware we are of what we’re eating, the less likely we will hear our body’s request to stop. Most people who multi-task around mealtime or power-eat in five minutes may not even recognize the signal, then wonder why the heck they are so full.
Leave some for later. The great thing about modern refrigeration is we can always save part of our meal. My daughter and I always order more pizza than we can eat in a single sitting, so we have leftovers for breakfast and sometimes lunch. Bonus!

Personal pan pizza on a gluten-free cauliflower crust. Establishing healthful eating habits and working within your dietary limitations means sustained health.

Next Step: Choose Which Eating Habits to Change

Remember, these are only starting points. We are all works in progress and we have had decades to engrain our habits. Be gentle with yourself as you try to change them.

One way to choose which to focus on is by recognizing how you reacted when you first read them. If you scoffed and said, “Well that’s impossible,” you’re probably right. For now. If your reaction was, “Ooh, maybe I could try that,” put it at the top of your list. For any that seem challenging but not impossible, hold them as options for the future.

Give yourself a good week to ten days to experiment with one. If it isn’t something that works for you, try another one. Maybe you can revisit it in the future. And remember, nobody expects perfection. Remember the new year’s post on KISAGE? Keep it simple and good enough. Pick one. Gamify. Make it fun. Learn from it. And if after ten days you notice a difference in how you’re eating, try experimenting with another.

My daughter chose fish and chips while I ordered gluten-free pizza. Restaurants allow us to choose exactly what is right for our individual bodies. Special-order or ask for a vegan or gluten-free menu; chances are, they can accommodate.

As always I love to hear what you’re learning about yourself in the comments. Feel free to share your experiences so we can all grow and learn together.

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How to Reframe Self-Talk for Greater Gain

Sometimes change is foisted upon us, like illness or breaking a bone. Other times, it is part of natural evolution, like graduating from high school or college. We can resist change, ignore it, or embrace it. Whatever change you are presently facing, notice what words you use to describe your experience to others. Are you looking at change as loss? Are you excited by the possibilities? Does change scare you? All of the above? As I explore Dan Sullivan’s book, The Gap and The Gain, I am discovering how to reframe self-talk for greater gain.

Cedar waxwing with gorgeous colorations on wing and tail feathers.

Empty Nest?

Our daughter, a senior in high school, qualified to compete in javelin at Districts, the last meet of her high school career. She took three AP exams in two weeks, the last time she will have to do so. We celebrated her eighteenth birthday for an entire week and attended several awards ceremonies and final concerts. Over the next two weeks, she is preparing for prom and graduation with her closest friends. If I feel overwhelmed at all these milestones, I can only imagine what she is feeling. While she prepares for college in September, my husband and I also face a huge change: the “empty nest.”

As a birder, I know that “empty nest” refers to the time when young birds have developed enough strength in their wings and loft in their feathers to leave the nest, a process called fledging. This time of year, females teach their offspring how to survive in the world. We once watched a mama robin tend three clutches of three to four babies each, in one season. Humans, however, need many years to prepare their children to leave home or “fledge.” To me, “empty nest” conjures ending, sadness, and loss. I don’t want to spend the next few months of summer feeling sad. I realized in thinking about this blog post that I am stuck in “The GAP” thinking. Again.

Birds without young will immediately eat whatever they collect. This American robin parent is collecting bugs to feed its young. — Birds without hatchlings will immediately eat whatever they collect. This American robin parent is collecting bugs to feed its young.

Recent Tiger Outing

How can I flex my GAIN muscle and replace the “empty nest” metaphor with something happier? I reflected on my most recent hike to Tiger Mountain, which I wrote about in a blog post last fall about Tiger’s beauty despite logging. Happily, logging has ended and the warning signs have all been removed. West Tiger summits 3, 2, 1, and beyond are all accessible again, although they look much different.

On May 22, Ajax and I did a belated Mother’s Day ramble to discover for ourselves how much things have changed and to see what we could still identify.

Reframe Self-talk: Notice the Positives

I won’t lie, I miss the trees. However, I noticed a number of positives:

Fantastic views: on a beautiful clear day, you can now see Mt. Baker, Mt. Rainier, and the entire Puget Sound area from any of West Tiger’s summits.
Returning wildlife: birds have returned to the trees on the edge of the logging area. We saw a pair of bald eagles surveying the region and heard Anna’s hummingbirds and red-breasted nuthatches as we emerged from the forest.
Planted saplings: someone — WTA volunteers? Weyerhauser? — has already planted baby trees along the trail between Tiger 3 and Tigers 2 and 1. In the future, lovely cool forests will once again top Tiger Mountain.
Cherished solitude: on a lovely spring day when the rest of Tiger Mountain — and probably every other trail near the Puget Sound — was flooded with hikers, Ajax and I pretty much had the Preston trail to ourselves.

A bald eagle perched atop a tree remaining in the clearcut area between Tiger 3 and Tiger 2.

Reframe Self-talk

Broken bones, “empty nests,” and logging on Tiger all involve drastic change. In chapter five of The Gap and The Gain Sullivan defines the term “selective attention,” as focusing on what matters to us personally. To get to THE GAIN we must train ourselves to look for it. Instead of bringing attention to my daughter’s “lasts” over the next few weeks, could I reframe my own thinking to help her see them as “firsts”?

Rather than her last time with high school friends, she can celebrate her first formal dance. Instead of saying farewell to her high school, maybe she’d handle it more positively by thinking of it as her first graduation. And instead of sending her off to explore her college campus by herself to see if she can figure it out, we can make it a game this summer, bookending such excursions with ice cream and shopping. I can help her look at all the small daily gains, much like I celebrated the recent victories of making a full fist, dumping out a wheelbarrow, or slicing Swiss cheese.

Happy high school seniors celebrating after a recent awards ceremony. If we can teach our kids to reframe self-talk, they can focus on positives rather than loss.

Examine Your Words For Clues

The fact is, our daughter leaves for college in the fall. Things will change. Lasts signify endings and loss. Firsts signify beginnings and hope. Empty implies a hole, or something missing. Starting a new chapter breathes with life and vitality. If we celebrate the new experiences our daughter is about to have, we can face this change expecting opportunity rather than sadness. By changing the words we use to describe a situation, we change our attitude toward it. We can flex the GAIN muscle.

The next time you hear yourself using “have to” or “should,” remember that you always have choices. Whenever you dread something, stop to focus on the good that might come from it. If you are creating a story for your future, examine the specific words you use. Are they positive or negative? Can you change your story so you feel better about it? I may not have answers, but after forty blog posts, I have many tools to use to face what comes next. If you have helpful tools to share with readers, we welcome your comments below.

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Inspiration from Life and Literature on Managing Pain

This week I have been toying with random thoughts about pain. I searched for the origin of the quote, “Pain is weakness leaving the body.” Did it come from sports? Business? Parenting? I learned it is often used to motivate military troops or reluctant exercisers facing the initial discomfort of challenging workouts. I read from others in pain how such a mantra does not help in managing pain. What does?

An occupational therapist who has worked with me to rehab my broken wrist suggested a more useful approach. When our bodies guard against pain, i.e. following an accident or injury, we need to re-educate our nervous system to tolerate pain once again. In other words, increasing our pain threshold decreases pain sensitivity. By putting up with some discomfort now, we will have less overall pain in the future. I could get behind that one.

One way of managing pain is to get outside and surround yourself with beauty.

Managing Pain – Physical

I fell back on 25 years of experience as a personal trainer to translate her comment into useful advice. Take hiking, for example. If you have never hiked before, and you go out to the mountains for an eight-mile trip with too much in your pack, you will likely experience pain from Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness (DOMS) over the next few days. You might even strain an underprepared muscle that could leave you out for the season.

But if you “sneak up” on your hiking mileage and do a little more each time, the pain won’t be as bad and will eventually disappear as you increase your tolerance. Could the same concept hold true with rehabilitation? Was I hurting myself in the long run by protecting myself from all pain?

The author and Ajax hiking this week three years ago. Rather than getting down about where I am, I used the image of Rainier to inspire myself to get back out there in the next month. — The author and Ajax hiking this week three years ago. Rather than getting discouraged about where I am, I used the image of Rainier to inspire myself to get back out there in the coming month.

With newfound understanding, I endured her poking and prodding at my wrist. Sessions with my myofascial release practitioner were excruciating at first, and as he got deeper into the tissue it seemed like the pain was getting worse rather than better. Finally, in a session this week, he said, “We’ve never gotten this deep because your wrist has been so sensitive.” Aha! I WAS getting more tolerant of pain. Shock training was similar; I had to work through initial discomfort for it to be better the next time. Who knew?

Managing Pain – Emotional

Can we use the same idea of progressive overload to train ourselves emotionally? Can we “get accustomed” to grief, or at least learn new coping tools, so the next time we lose something or someone it won’t feel as devastating? I tested that theory recently.

In an earlier post (November 2021) I mentioned volunteering at Woodland Park Zoo for the past eight years. For reasons I won’t discuss, I decided this week to discontinue volunteering, something I have been considering over the past six months. I thought leaving would be more difficult than it was. It turns out pondering for six months was way more painful than actually leaving which took all of two minutes in an e-mail. I felt initial sadness and then profound relief. This leads me to another great quote a client brought up recently.

Baby Hasani weeks after his birth in May 2019. He was born with hyperextended fetlocks and wore special “shoes” to brace his hind legs until he was strong enough to go without. All living creatures experience pain to some degree. How do you face yours?

Be the Buffalo

On a recent hike on Big Tree Ridge, a hiking partner told me to, “Be the buffalo.” I asked her to explain. She said that instead of racing away from storms, buffalo charge into them in order to experience less overall discomfort. Genius! Procrastinators often make their pain worse by dwelling — for hours, days, weeks, months, maybe even years — on the negative possibilities instead of facing the problem head-on.

Rather than avoiding the pain of physical therapy, once I started embracing it and inviting it into my own training sessions, I made faster gains. The pain diminished. And I sped toward healing.

"Be the Buffalo" means charge toward the storm, or that thing you want to avoid. Embracing the pain NOW means it won't be as bad LATER and will be over sooner. Bison charging over a fence near Yellowstone National Park. — “Be the Buffalo” means charge toward the storm or that thing you want to avoid. Embracing the pain NOW means it won’t be as bad LATER and will be over sooner. Bison charging over a fence near Yellowstone National Park.

Never Lose Hope

Matt Haig, the author of one of my favorite contemporary novels, the Midnight Library, writes in The Comfort Book: “It’s not what happens to you, but how you react that matters.” Buddhism teaches that life is all about suffering. Everyone suffers. We all experience pain. Yet some deal with it far easier than others. They have the resilience I am after.

Later in the same book, he repeats a line: “Nothing is stronger than a small hope that never gives up.” Print it. Frame it. Post it everywhere you feel discouraged and anytime you are in pain. That pain will pass.

To close this week, I offer you a symbol of your own small hope, if you wish: a black bear cub from Yellowstone, cute and cuddly when young but a force to be reckoned with as an adult. May you face today whatever pains you, so that your hope grows into an unstoppable force tomorrow.

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Gap and Gain a Powerful Paradigm Shift for the Brain

Every so often I read a book expecting one thing but finding something completely different. Or I come across advice that I need at a specific low moment. Dan Sullivan’s book, The Gap and The Gain: High Achievers’ Guide to Happiness, Confidence, and Success, delivered both. It provided a powerful paradigm shift decades overdue and inspired me to pursue the “Gainer’s mentality” rather than the “Gapper’s.”

Island Lake July 6, 2021. Before my injury, hiking 12-15 miles was just what Ajax and I did. Now I've had to reset my expectations. Touching right thumb to pinkie is a major win. I choose to see the GAIN rather than live in the GAP. — Island Lake July 6, 2021. Before my injury, hiking 12-15 miles was just what Ajax and I did. Now I’ve had to reset my expectations. Touching right thumb to pinkie is a major win. I choose to see the GAIN rather than live in the GAP.

The GAP and GAIN Defined

Mountain lovers might open Sullivan’s book expecting a discussion about peaks and valleys. Instead, it addresses what we choose to compare ourselves to: an impossible ideal that is constantly changing (GAP), or your starting point (GAIN).

The GAP

“You’re in the GAP every time you measure yourself or your situation against an ideal,” (p. xxiii.) If you identify with setting a goal and then, as soon as you reach it, setting another, harder goal that will require more from you and is farther away, you may be a “Gapper.” If you pursue something for many years but never quite attain it, and you feel like your very happiness depends on reaching it, you may be in the GAP. When I started studying children’s fiction in 2014, I decided to write a novel. I have penned five over the last eight years. Happiness and bliss, right? Writing for kids should bring me joy, right?

Hmm. Not exactly.

Being in the GAP

It turns out I have probably been “in the GAP” most of my adult life. When I first had a client reach the summit of Mt. Everest, I was thrilled. Until I wanted more. I coached a woman to reach each of the Seven Summits, the highest peak on each continent. And wondered where to find more. When I reached twelve pullups, surely I could get to twenty-five. When I climbed Rainier, that was enough… for two days, when I decided I had to go back. Now, eight summits later, I want to reach ten. Nice round number, right? So what?

I even had goals around raising my daughter! (She is doing just fine, by the way.) Will the same thing happen when I reach my goal of fifty blog posts in fifty weeks? Or will that be enough to spark joy, happiness and bliss?

As soon as I reach a goal, I arbitrarily move my finish line. Sound familiar? I am never quite satisfied; I keep wanting more. Sullivan points out that Americans are chasing the wrong goal in our endless “pursuit of happiness.” (Thanks, Thomas Jefferson. Turns out he was in the GAP.) We are using the wrong metric. We are measuring the gap when we should be measuring the GAIN.

The GAIN

I help clients set realistic goals for what they want to accomplish in the mountains. Since getting to the final destination is outside our control, I try to teach them about enjoying the journey. We might run into bad weather, obstacles, illness, or injuries before we even start. But we can enjoy the training hikes, the strength we feel in the gym, the ways our bodies react to increased flexibility or better sleep and nutrition. I ask clients to track their progress so they can see where they started and how far they’ve come. I ask them to track their GAINS.

Slipping out of the GAIN

Like everyone else, I set high expectations for myself. Such as going on thirty hikes a year, something I did in both 2020 and 2021. But when I broke my wrist in February, I had to reset all this year’s expectations. I had trouble doing the simplest hiking-related tasks, such as lacing boots, fastening my dog’s harness, shouldering and loading a pack, and even driving a car.

For weeks, I wondered whether I’d ever get back to where I was in October of 2021 — I couldn’t even pick up trash anymore. I sank deeper into THE GAP, comparing myself to an ideal that no longer fit my situation. When I thought I would need surgery, I got depressed. For four days I didn’t want to do anything.

Will I see signs like this again? Absolutely. But they don't define my happiness. I can find happiness within me, around anything. By focusing on the right things. — Will I see signs like this again? Absolutely. But they don’t define my happiness. I can find happiness within me, around anything. By focusing on the right things.

Powerful Paradigm Shift Toward Happiness

That is when I started reviewing Ingrid Fetell Lee’s book on joy. Wherever possible, I lined up people who could help me heal, repair, and rebuild my wrist. I diligently applied myself to the physical therapy exercises and little by little, I noticed changes. As soon as I could zip my coat (it was winter, after all), I smiled. Securing my dog’s favorite harness nearly made me cry. And the freedom I felt from finally doing my hair and clipping my nails was huge. Last week I returned to the mountains to hike — twice. I am BACK.

They say hindsight is 20/20 and as soon as I read the prologue to Sullivan’s book, I knew instantly I had to share it with readers. It’s that profound. True, what I hiked was not Mount Rainier. Not even close. It was not even the distance or gain of Pratt, Melakwa, Island, or Rainbow Lakes, all hikes I did last summer without thinking much about the mileage. But using Sullivan’s approach, I now compare myself to where I was at ground zero eleven weeks ago when I struggled to touch my right thumb and index finger together.

Crossing the bridge back from Talapus and Olallie Lakes, July 2021. We will return this year, I guarantee it. I never quit. Powerful paradigm shift. — Crossing the bridge back from Talapus and Olallie Lakes, July 2021. We will return this year, I guarantee it. I never quit.

Choosing the Gain

Now, I can cut an apple or potato with a knife. I can see the palm of my hand without needing a pair of mirrors. Before starting The Gap and The Gain, my thoughts still went to where I was prior to eleven weeks ago.

No more. I choose not to return to THE GAP as it no longer serves me. I see a better way. Will I get where I was again? Absolutely, someday. That’s another lesson I have learned since December 13: I never give up.

But right now, I choose happiness. I choose to look at how far I’ve come and celebrate that, not what I perceive as loss. So can you.

And I choose to read on. Who knows what other insights I will glean if I got this much out of Sullivan’s prologue?

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Learn How to Make Progress With Positive Self-Talk

Blog post 37 is a compilation of my own experience and that of clients struggling to move forward this week. Some of us are injured; others are angry with themselves or feeling discouraged. A few are sharing that they are not moving forward as quickly as they would like. Sound familiar? You are NOT alone. I thought once I got my cast off, I would be home free, but that was the START of a long, uphill climb. The way to make progress may lie in focusing carefully, using positive self-talk, and resetting our expectations.

This trillium is imperfect - but still beautiful. Can you learn to treat yourself like you would a best friend and point out the beautiful positives? — This trillium is imperfect but still beautiful. Can you learn to treat yourself like you would a best friend and focus on the beautiful positives?

Focus Carefully

For anyone who is constantly fixated on that little number on a scale, remind yourself of one very simple truth. Ready? YOU ARE NOT YOUR MASS. Print it in triplicate in 72-point font and hang it up everywhere you need a reminder. Scales don’t know your BMI, cannot ascertain how much muscle you have, and know zero about all of your outstanding personal qualities. The scale only tells you ONE tiny bit of information, and yet so many of us obsess over that number. If you rely on the scale reading every single morning, ask yourself why.

Whenever you have a medical appointment and your doctor insists on weighing you, explain that you are trying to have a healthier relationship with your body and want to break the scale habit. Face the opposite direction and ask the doctor not to tell you the number. And if your doctor cannot respect that, find one who will. Media tries to get us to obsess about our exterior looks, but what about the rest of you? If you have great bloodwork, healthy blood pressure, and a consistent movement routine, then celebrate that. Eff the scale!

Nature is imperfect but beautiful all the same. So are you. You are NOT your mass. You are so much more.

Use Positive Self-talk

Focus on the positives rather than “shoulding all over yourself” or saying “I wish I could.” Such messages hurt us and shut us down, rather than inspire and help. Find a few affirmations to repeat daily such as “Every day in every way I am getting stronger and healthier,” or, “I love my body and my problems and wouldn’t trade with anyone,” or, “My current experience is teaching me about life.” The words we use are very powerful.

Early in the process of recovering from my broken wrist, I babied my arm because I wanted to be certain I didn’t need surgery. When my doctor agreed I was stable enough that I wouldn’t need surgery, but I was “way behind,” I bought into his message and started aggressively doing whatever I could to regain full range of motion.

Enjoying the solitude of the wilderness. I don't know who has more fun, me or my dog. — Enjoying the solitude of the wilderness. I don’t know who has more fun, me or my dog.

Unfortunately, the cast was improperly set, resulting in thumb problems. When I was misdiagnosed with trigger thumb, I got stuck in a rut repeating negative messages, practically convincing myself I was going to need surgery after all. As soon as I started to use “I got this,” “I am strong,” “I am healthy,” and just this week, “I am a hiker,” things turned around. I got my confidence back.

Whether you think you can or cannot, you are absolutely right

YOU can turn yourself around. Every healthy bite, every step forward, every affirmation, every repetition helps you build your positivity track record. The next time you catch yourself thinking “I can’t” or “I wish I could change X about myself,” grab a piece of paper and write down ten — yes, TEN — things that are going well or that you like about yourself or your life. If it helps, share how you feel afterward in the comments.

Even though I have been 100% gluten-free for eight years (Thanks, Ajax!), I can still enjoy delicious pizza. This cauliflower crust was magnificent and I had it three nights in a row while in Moab.

Reset Expectations

Can we do a multi-day backpack a month after recovering from foot issues? Is it realistic to climb a mountain several months after surgery? How long does it take for a wrist to heal enough to tolerate pullups? And if none of those goals come true, what then?

We often set exceedingly high expectations for ourselves without knowing whether it is actually possible. Humans have the unique ability to hope. However, sometimes we have to amend or adjust our expectations. And that is hard.

Delicate Maidenhair ferns grow where there is a lot of moisture. Can you think of the hard times as fertilizer for a hardier, better you? Reframe the negative experiences into positive learning lessons and watch yourself take off.

Baby Steps Count

I mistakenly thought I would be in the clear once I got my cast off. I never expected complications (you never do — fortunately I have a pretty decent track record as far as bones go.) When I realized I had underestimated how long it would take to return to full performance, it felt like a smack in the face.

Several wise mentors reminded me of the positive steps I WAS taking, each and every day. We can’t compare to our previous personal bests (or that of others), but only to our recent selves. I may not be what I call “Rainier Ready” right now but that’s okay. How far can I move my thumb? Can I hold a tight fist for thirty seconds rather than ten? Will icing twice make the swelling go down even more? Today I fastened a hoodie zipper that had eluded me for nine weeks. Baby steps, but progress nonetheless.

An example of positive self-talk: Thoughts are like waves. We can't stop them from coming but we can choose which ones to surf. — An example of positive self-talk: Thoughts are like waves. We can’t stop them from coming but we can choose which ones to surf.

With Positive Self-talk, Embrace Your Progress

We don’t get any do-overs in life. We each face unique obstacles. How are you going to handle them? You are the hero or heroine of your own story. Can you step outside yourself and picture your favorite character handling your problems? Maybe that will give you new insights to try.

So, as long as you are taking positive steps forward each day, even if it is a five-minute action, celebrate. If you are doing more than you have in your workouts and feeling the results, pat yourself on the back. My wish for you is that you find a way to enjoy the process and embrace your progress, not just live for the end goal. This is a delicate topic but one we are all experiencing. Share your wisdom in the comments section so we can all learn from each other. And remember, you are not alone!

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Focus on Recovery To Move Forward

The last time I broke a bone was a fractured metatarsal in my left foot over twenty years ago, weeks before I climbed Kilimanjaro. Before that, fresh out of college, I broke my left arm. I only recall two things from that first experience: casts trap the odor of garlic. They also cause terribly itchy skin. Over time I’ve seen that older adults take much longer to heal than kids, teens, and young adults. Even if we have an iron will and a high tolerance for pain. Following my recent wrist injury of 2/22/22, I have been reflecting on the importance of recovery to move forward, for myself and for my adult clients over fifty.

Animals have the right idea. My dog is constantly lounging but ready to go the instant I say "walkie." Recovery to move forward — Animals have the right idea. My dog is constantly lounging but ready to go the instant I say “walkie.”

When To Prioritize Recovery

If you feel stuck with your workouts, or you struggle to make any gains despite herculean efforts, check your overall volume of activity and the quality of your sleep. Rest and recovery play an enormous role in sports performance as well as in injury recovery. Most adults don’t seem to get enough sleep.

What are some indicators of overtraining? The following behavioral indicators are your body’s way of making further increases in stress volume and performance improvement nearly impossible:

Apathy
Changes in sleep patterns
Decreased libido
Increased thirst or sugar cravings (beyond the norm)
Lethargy or sluggishness
Loss of ability to concentrate
Unexplained irritability

Our bodies are remarkably intelligent. Can you tune into what your body is telling you?

Physical indicators include:

Change in resting heart rate
Diarrhea
Fatigue or muscle soreness beyond DOMS (Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness)
Infection
Injury
Lymph gland swelling
Reduced performance (slowed times, weaker on climbs or lifts),
Slow-healing wounds
Unusual weight fluctuation

None of these is a “sure” indicator. However, if you have several at one time, your body may be asking for rest.

Rest

A properly designed training program includes at least one day per week for active recovery or rest. If you are hiking more than five miles with a weighted pack, plan to take the following day off for stretching or walking. A light yoga or stretching session, hot tub soak, or massage might also help. If you feel like you need an extra day of rest, take it. As you get more accustomed to the rigors of your training program, you will find your stamina and recovery improving. Without including regular periods of rest in your seasonal schedule, you run the risk of burnout, overuse, or worse, injury.

Sports Massage

Recovering from tough workouts can take many forms. A common sports restoration method is massage, although there are almost as many different forms of massage as there are sports. After a long hike, you may enjoy flushing strokes to help speed the removal of lactic acid and other built-up waste products that accumulate during exercise. Anything deeper (i.e. rolfing) may actually cause muscle damage.

If you feel muscle stiffness or soreness, you might enjoy an occasional massage, but be aware that exclusively using one method may result in your body adapting to it. You might get better results by cycling through the methods you choose.

Jetty near the Lewis and Clark Interpretive Center in Ilwaco, WA.

Proper Nutrition

After you’ve been hiking for multiple hours, it’s important to get quality nutrition to help replenish depleted glycogen stores. Consider starting with a mixture of carbohydrates (40-50%) and protein (20-30%) along with healthy fats (20-30%) and adjust to suit your individual needs. Foods containing antioxidants (like blueberries) or bromelain (like pineapple) can also help the body speed healing. Consider blending together yogurt, fresh fruit or juice, and collagen or protein powder with ice for a refreshing and nutritious snack.

Exercise and Illness

The six hours following any challenging workout is the critical phase for remaining healthy. That’s when your immune system is the most stressed and the least capable of fighting off illness. I use the reminder, “Above the neck, what the heck? Below the head, stay in bed.” If you have a scratchy throat, runny nose, or sneezing, you may be able to train at reduced intensity. However, if you experience chills, fever, aching muscles, or chest cold (i.e. you’re coughing up material from deep in your lungs), your body needs rest. Drinking plenty of liquid, getting additional sleep, and sure you are getting enough vitamin C and D can help.

There is nothing more soothing than a nap snuggling with a favorite pet!

Alternating Heat-Cold

Another great recovery technique is soaking in a hot tub or shower for twenty minutes. If you choose this method, continue to drink fluids to help speed recovery. Consider alternating between heat and cold — a short stint in the hot tub, followed by a quick dip in a cold shower or, if you’re so equipped, a cool pool – two or three rounds back and forth. This works really well for lower body issues (such as sprained ankles, swollen legs, or plantar fasciitis.) Try adding lavender oil and epsom salts for a delicious treat for the body.

A barefoot walk on the beach was just what I needed. We didn't know there would be a kite festival going on! — A barefoot walk on the beach was just what I needed. We didn’t know there would be a kite festival going on!

Active Recovery To Move Forward

Outdoor athletes can benefit from active recovery workouts reduced in intensity, either later on the same day or on days following long workouts. The distance hiker or backpacker might take a shorter walk with less gain, less effort, and no pack. Active recovery can also take the form of cross-training, using completely different muscle groups than those used in your sport – activities like gardening, flat bicycling, yoga, Tai Chi, or strolling barefoot along the beach are all suitable activities for recovery.

During my recent recovery weekend, not only did I get lots of rest, but I also enjoyed new-to-me "Synchronized Kite Flying" by the Quad Squad. — During my recent recovery weekend, not only did I get lots of rest, but I also enjoyed new-to-me “Synchronized Kite Flying” by the Quad Squad.

Relax and Stretch

Stay off your feet, see a movie, read a good book (or three!), take a short nap (or sleep in). Sit on the floor and stretch gently. Listen to soothing music. Connect your bare feet to the earth, known as grounding. Eat plenty of good, wholesome food. Try some yoga or meditation. Active recovery means unstructured time for the body, mind, and spirit. If your program has enough built-in recovery time, you will be supercharged and moving forward with more health, vibrancy, and well-being.

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How to Get Unstuck When Nothing Else Works

I won’t lie; it’s been a tough week. And not just for me. I have experienced a number of disappointments I won’t go into, along with several joys. Such is life. But when I’m proverbially stuck in a valley longer than I am on the peaks, I know I need to dig into extra strategies to pull myself out. When nothing else works, perhaps something below will help you the next time you want to bury your head in bed and skip a day, or a week.

Springtime in Seattle brings beautiful tulips, daffodils, and lovely birdsong. When nothing else works, try taking a walk and focusing on your five senses.

Get Outside

Whenever I feel overwhelmed, under-motivated, blocked, or stuck, I almost always find peace and tranquility in nature. Especially this time of year with all the birdsong and blossoms. Twice on Monday, I broke down in painful tears. My lovely canine companion trotted over, to lick the salt from my cheeks, tail wagging the whole time. He may not be certified as a therapy dog, but he is MY therapy dog. It’s impossible to stay sad for long when a bundle of fur is nosing his way into my personal space.

I felt a brief twinge of annoyance both times — after all, I was making my way through my endless list of rehabilitative exercises — but then I recognized his wordless wisdom: “Mama, I know just what you need. Walkies!” And by golly, it worked, both times. The take-away: if you can’t think of any way forward, then PHYSICALLY move outside. The fresh air might do wonders.

Give Your Brain a Small Task to Focus On

This past week I have depended on several other things to get me through: puzzles; books; movement; and chores.

Puzzles

Two types of puzzles have helped this week. Short 200-300-piece jigsaw puzzles are doable in a single sitting. When you are putting together pieces of a beautiful image (of playful kittens or a peaceful beach scene) it’s hard to feel mopey. The other type is word games, though any short game or app can do in a pinch. Wordle has taken the world by storm. I prefer Classic Words, the closest I can find to old-fashioned Scrabble. Time: 5-30 minutes.

Books

Likewise, the latest books I’ve read — In Your Shoes by Donna Gephart, Out Of My Heart by Sharon Draper, and Sunshine by Marion Dane Bauer — have provided food for thought when the idea of preparing a meal with one hand leaves me wanting to skip meals. These three middle-grade novels are about outsiders trying to fit in. Each provides a fresh perspective on injury and disability. I could take on a deep and challenging read, but when I have low bandwidth, reading books that are light, easy, and entertaining feels more self-compassionate. Time: several hours, broken into 5+ minute increments.

Movement

It is easy to get overwhelmed by the daunting list of “to-do’s” around injury or illness recovery. As someone who knows quite a bit about the physical body, my list includes physical therapy exercises, red light therapy, massage, sauna, isometrics, hot tub, strength, medical appointments, and more. I could easily spend the whole day doing wrist-related activities and then collapse into bed only to start the whole thing the following day.

Instead, it helps to set a KISAGE goal. What is enough? Today, can I get my thumb and pinkie to touch without help from my left hand? Can I make it through dinner right-handed without dropping my fork? Can I work on developing an increased range of motion while I walk my dog? Fifteen-minute segments dispersed throughout the day.

The author practices with prusiks. Not possible while recovering from a broken wrist. But this gym is amply equipped for rehabilitation.

When Nothing Else Works, Prioritize Recovery

Sometimes even the special tricks above don’t work. If you have a pet, you might want to put on music and snuggle. Or watch a favorite movie. If you are an extrovert, try calling a friend to join you for a walk or meet on Zoom or Facetime. If your usual fun hobbies hold little appeal, you might try one of my last three tricks: eat, sleep, or cry.

Eat Something Nourishing

No, this is not an invitation to binge. But I have noticed during my injury, I have had a greatly decreased interest in food. Partly because it is hard to prepare one-handed, and partly because what I can make has become super boring. One day I forgot to eat until three and wondered why I was so wiped out. However, if you go too long without food, you might get hangry (hungry/angry) or overly emotional. If you struggle to remember when you last ate, have a nourishing meal. As soon as I get a decent meal in me I usually feel much better.

A gluten-free personal pan pizza with cauliflower crust. Delicious!

Get Extra Sleep

If you are completely exhausted, you may need to double down on your efforts to get enough sleep. I usually get 7.5-8 hours of sleep. But during my recovery, I recently slept close to ten hours, then took an hour and a half nap that afternoon. Healing — bones, from illness, from grief — takes time and effort to prioritize. When I can’t muster the energy for anything else, I take a book and my dog into the bedroom for a nap. It almost always helps me feel better.

Ajax at eight weeks. He has the right idea. When in doubt, take a time out!

Let It Out!

I come from a background of hiding tears, feeling somehow that crying is a sign of weakness. Nothing could be further from the truth. According to Medical News Today, crying may actually help us reduce stress hormones and other chemicals that build up in our bodies. No wonder we feel better after a big cry!

If you have a favorite strategy not mentioned above, please feel free to share the wealth and comment below. Good luck, and remember, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

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How to Hold Your Own Joy Treasure Hunt

On February 17, I posted about the first two aesthetics of joy (energy, i.e. color and light, and abundance) from Ingrid Fetell Lee’s book, Joyful: The Surprising Power of Ordinary Things To Create Extraordinary Happiness. When I broke my wrist, I found it difficult to identify joy. At times I could barely keep up, doing everything left-handed, and dealing with pain. But now that I get my cast off in two days, I am hunting for what makes me feel light and content. What makes you say “Yay” or “Wow”? Can you hold your own joy treasure hunt?

Photography, hiking, and mountains are included in my joy treasure hunt. While I haven't been able to get out as often as I'd like since December 10, once my cast comes off there will be nothing left to stop me. Rainier casts a shadow beyond Little Tahoma, sunset July 10, 2017. — Photography, hiking, and mountains are included in my joy treasure hunt. While I haven’t been able to get out as often as I’d like since December 10, once my cast comes off there will be nothing left to stop me. Rainier casts a shadow beyond Little Tahoma, sunset July 10, 2017.

Joy Treasure Hunt: Aesthetic of Freedom

The joy aesthetic that means the most to me is freedom. I had just started listening to Lee discuss this aesthetic as we headed for Arches National Park. I looked forward to traveling, exploring new places, hiking, and shooting photos. Even after I broke my wrist, I had to get out and enjoy the aftermath of a big snowstorm, sling and all.

Taking photos using my left hand — with two fingers, no less — proved difficult. But I sparked with joy when I saw the expanse of blue sky over crisp white snow and red rock. The freedom aesthetic includes a preference for natural fabrics and loose-fitting clothing. I am glad I had some with me, as it was the only thing I could maneuver one-handed AND fit over my bulky sling. If we hadn’t had fresh snow on the ground, I would have removed my shoes to walk around barefoot, a practice known as grounding or earthing.

On one of my "Freedom walks" which I take most mornings in every new place I visit, I often look for my shadow. Here, I'm set against red rock, white snow, and crisp blue sky. — On one of my “Freedom walks”, I often look for my shadow. Here, I’m set against red rock, white snow, and crisp blue sky.

The Aesthetic of Transcendence

Of Lee’s next four aesthetics (Harmony, Play, Surprise, and Transcendence), I identify most with transcendence. She includes in it the power of the treehouse. (I have always wanted one). Of skylights and rooms with space and high ceilings, both of which we have in our current home. Lofts, hills, mountains, and looking up to the clouds, skies, and stars. Views from elevated places. Check. She really speaks my language.

When I look at the shadow cast by Mt. Rainier and see that summit looming, beckoning, I feel awe. Joy. And when she mentioned inflatables, I smiled, recalling the memorable birthday experience I had several years ago during a sunset hot-air balloon ride.

What would you include in your own joy treasure hunt? Can you include more of those moments?

The Aesthetic of Celebration

Of Lee’s last three aesthetics, Magic, Celebration, and Renewal, we experienced all three at the Admitted Students Preview on the University of Washington campus. On March 26, we experienced a magical day that combined school spirit, a celebration of my daughter’s hard work over the past four years, and gorgeous seasonal cherry blossoms in full splendor.

Two beaming Admitted Students preview the University of Washington campus. Huge joyful grins. What's not to love? — Two beaming Admitted Students preview the University of Washington campus. Huge joyful grins. What’s not to love?

Think of those moments that stand out to you as special. What made them so? Was it the place, the event, the people you were with? Did you enjoy novelty, surprise, or whimsy? In the next few days, whenever you catch yourself smiling, jot down a few words about the moment. See what patterns you find. In going on your own joy treasure hunt, you will discover your unique “recipe” to create even more. And if my two-part “book review” intrigues you, check it out for yourself. Happy hunting.

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How to Mentally Prepare for Summit Day

When getting ready for some sort of physical adventure, most people increase their targeted exercise. But don’t forget about mental preparation! Below we review a typical multi-day trip on Mt. Rainier (including photos from our climb in July, 2017) and discuss how to mentally prepare for summit day.

Little Tahoma behind a roped group of climbers on the approach into Camp Schurman, day 1. Note the size of crevasses in the foreground.

Mentally Prepare with Suitable Physical Conditioning

Most multi-day expeditions (backpacking in the Canyonlands, hiking the Pacific Crest Trail, trekking to Everest Base Camp or the summit of Kilimanjaro) and high-altitude climbs (Rainier, Mt. Blanc, Ecuadorian or Mexican volcanoes) require months of physical conditioning. The higher and/or longer the trip, the more involved the training.

Consider a 3-day climb of a 14,410-foot peak such as Mt. Rainier. Such a climb involves ascending 4-5,000 feet while carrying a heavy pack (anywhere from 35-55 pounds) on Day 1. Day 2 includes reviewing technical skills and acclimatization. Day 3 is all about going to the summit (another 4-5,000 feet) carrying a day pack, then returning to base camp to retrieve gear, and descending back to the trailhead.

Sunset at 10,000 feet in July. Way after we were supposed to be trying to get some sleep!

Since this blog focuses on getting unstuck, I discuss the mental components of such trips. If the above pertains to you, you can find more about physical training information here.

Prepare with a Long Day

To get ready for your summit day, (think Everest, Denali, or Mt. Rainier) consider including a Long Day. The Log Day is an all-day trip with a loaded pack. You might be thinking, “What? On top of everything else I’m already doing? What about WORK and FAMILY and SLEEP?” You can skip it… But it could mean the difference between enjoying your trip and suffering.

Let’s look more closely at that three-day climb of Rainier. Reach base camp Day 1 early afternoon, set up camp, melt snow for water, eat. Get used to the higher altitude. Get as much sleep as you can while perhaps being disturbed by others going for their summit attempt. Day 2, try to hydrate and practice self-arrest and roped travel skills. Go to bed as early as you can while the sun is still up and others in camp are still awake.

Get up at midnight on Day 3 to get ready (in cold, dark, unfamiliar conditions). Start climbing by 1 or 2 a.m. via headlamp and moonlight if you are lucky. On a coordinated team, you might reach the summit by 9 a.m. If not, you might take as long as twelve hours from base camp.

Camp Schurman with a full moon in the earliest hours of Jul 9, 2017, our summit day.

That’s just to get to the summit. You still have to get down.

Return to base camp (descending 4-5,000’) in 3-5 more hours Have a snack, refill water bottles, tear down camp and pack up. Descend another 3-5,000’ to the trailhead in 3-5 hours. Total round trip time on Day 3 can be upwards of 18 hours for slower parties.

If you have never hiked 10-12 hours in a day, you will have no idea how your body will perform. Back-to-Backs are crucial for experiencing what repeat days will feel like without recovery time. The Long Day will help you prepare your feet, shoulders, patience, and mental faculties for the extreme endurance needed.

The deep purple shadow cast by Mt. Rainier. One of my all-time favorite components of alpine climbing is how other-worldly everything looks above tree level. The other? Being self-sufficient in dealing with the elements.

Psychological Components

Succeeding on a high-altitude trip is an exercise in unknowns. If you are going with a guided group, you may not know any of the other participants until you arrive. You also cannot control the weather. While you can plan a trip during “optimal months” or “high season”, conditions vary annually, and El Nino, La Nina, and recent storms can all change things — not to mention global politics.

Skills day (day 2) at Camp Schurman with time for some hip stretching.

However, there are some things you can control ahead of time that can make you feel more comfortable on summit day, no matter where your adventure takes you.

Hydrate and fuel often

Consider setting a watch or phone alarm on your hikes to get into the habit of drinking every 30-45 minutes along with a light snack as you hike. Keep drink and food handy so you do not have to stop and remove your backpack whenever the urge to nibble strikes.

Day two breakfast before practicing skills. On 3-day a lot of time (and fuel) is used making sure everyone has enough water.

Gear Familiarity

For alpine starts you will be putting on crampons in the dark, tying knots by headlamp with cold fingers, starting a flame stove in the wind, and doing tasks on fitful sleep. Be as familiar with all of your equipment and gear as possible so that simple tasks do not use up precious energy or brainpower. Save it for the climb.

Heavy packs on the approach to Camp Schurman on the Emmons Glacier side. We did a 3-day climb July 7-9. — Knowing exactly where your gear is can help you be better mentally prepared. Heavy packs on the approach to Camp Schurman on the Emmons Glacier side for a July 7-9, 2017 trip.

Have a Mantra

Have a song you replay in your mind or some sort of saying you repeat to yourself whenever you start to feel overwhelmed. On Kilimanjaro in 2001 I used “Inch by inch, it’s a cinch” for the last push to the summit. And on Mt. Rainier I have told myself, “100 steps then look around.” When facing non-climbing tasks such as rehabbing my wrist, for example, I recently chose a small bite-sized goal like touching thumb and pinky together. Intermediate goals gives you something more immediate and possible to accomplish. Think baby steps.

Train Like You Will Travel

Listening to headphones on a climb is not the best idea. You want to be aware of your teammates and surroundings at all times. If you always listen to music or podcasts while hiking, include several hikes without earbuds so that you don’t become reliant on “entertainment” on long hikes. Likewise, if you always use two poles, try training with one so you will be comfortable having only an ice ax in your hand. And in the unlikely event that something should happen to your pole (s) you will feel more stable and confident hiking without if you need to.

The climb up the Inner Glacier, one of the steeper parts of the Emmons Glacier route on day one with full packs.

Set a Turn-around Time

Have, know, and stick to your group’s turn-around time. Having a set time can be a huge motivator that you WILL be able to rest and return at some point. This can help with pacing, and it is how guides gauge your progress. If you struggle to gain 500 feet per hour above base camp, they know you will be unable to reach the summit before snow conditions deteriorate. In something like rehabilitation, try a mini-goal of squeezing fist by X date and if it doesn’t happen, enlist help through a qualified physical therapist.

Practice Your Skills

The more familiar you are with the technical skills you will need on the trip — things ranging from roped travel to putting on crampons to self-arrest to cooking at altitude in the dark — the less brain power they will require. Having an extra day at high camp for acclimatization purposes and skills practice can make everyone on your team more attuned, relaxed, and ready for summit day. Likewise, along the way to getting published there are tons of skills to practice from honing your synopsis to line editing to knowing how to pitch your story to agents.

J. Sugarman demonstrates how to get your butt high and weight on the ice ax to stop yourself from sliding, a technique known as self-arrest.

Study the Route

Know what is expected of you and what the route will be like in terms of terrain, plans for rest breaks, and tricky navigation or technical areas. By understanding what you will face, you remove some “unknowns” that can be stressful. Study previous trip reports, talk with guides, other climbers who have done the route before, rangers at camp, or even descending climbers. Similarly, in the example of a fractured bone, know the path you are on. Ask questions!

Glacier Basin, about 3 miles from the parking lot, where many groups start to take their first rest break and soak up the view of the Inner Glacier, a steep climb on the way to Camp Schurman. Knowing what to expect helps you be mentally prepared.

Ready for Life

Ultimately, you can be in top physical condition and have great weather for your climb, but if you fumble with your equipment, get spooked by exposure, or forget to eat and drink regularly, you still run the risk of not reaching your objective. These are all things you can manage ahead of time if you know they are important. Now you do! Whatever your mountain, literally or physically, enlist the help of someone who has been there and can supply support and advice. And keep going. That’s the whole point of my previous blogs. Take it one step at a time. One chapter at a time. One fist squeeze at a time.

Rainier summit eight for the author, all via Camp Schurman / Emmons Glacier route.

Our team of eight, successfully stands on Mt. Rainier's summit at 14,411 feet on 7.9.17. — Our team of eight, successfully standing on Mt. Rainier’s summit at 14,411 feet on 7.9.17.

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Surviving a Broken Wrist in Arches’ Fiery Furnace

Blog 32 has been by far the most difficult post for me to complete. Not for lack of ideas — I came back from vacation bursting with them — but because I’ve had to dictate or hunt-and-peck it. On February 22, 2022, I broke my right wrist in Arches National Park’s famous maze hike, the Fiery Furnace, and have been managing everything left-handed (I am a righty).

Sandy washes, delicate growths, and stunning vertical rocks make the maze of the Fiery Furnace well worth exploring.

Fiery Furnace: Arrows Mark the Path

My husband, daughter, and I picked up self-guided day permits to visit the Fiery Furnace on 2-22-22. It is our favorite hike in Arches National Park (Moab, Utah). I hadn’t hiked since December 10, so I felt compelled to make up for lost time. By completing the orientation video on Monday, we could start hiking before the rest of the 60-some permitted hikers arrived.

Around 9:30 a.m. we began our counter-clockwise trip, searching for 27 miniature arrows that mark the way through the maze. Some arrows are posted at eye level, others on thin brown posts. A few have gone missing and have chalk-drawn scratches. Several are tricky to find. Part of the fun of the maze is exploring features in dead-ends, including five arches, squeezes, bowls and spires. Four years ago, we “got lost” until another party located the arrow we had missed. Can you spot the one in the picture below?

Red rock sandstone of the Fiery Furnace. The author's husband and daughter before towering spires. — Red rock sandstone of the Fiery Furnace. The author’s husband and daughter before towering spires.

Photographer’s Paradise

Of the five hundred photos I shot while on vacation, more than half were from our hike. Even during an overcast, somewhat chilly (below 40 F) day when the lighting is not optimal, I still found plenty to catch my eye. The unique rock features and delicate cacti and plants are a photographer’s dream. It’s no surprise that I was lagging behind, capturing as many of the features as I could.

In Arches National Park there is a saying, "Don't bust the crust." One look at the delicate succulents and brush trying to eke out a living here and you know not to get off the rocks or sandy washes. — In Arches National Park there is a saying, “Don’t bust the crust.” One look at the delicate succulents and brush trying to eke out a living in the desert and you know not to get off the rocks or sandy washes.

What’s more, the ranger had told us he’d only ever found fifteen arrows, so just as we like to track state license plates when we travel (i.e. the License Plate game), we tracked the arrows in the maze by taking photos of each. Knowing we would be doing it in the opposite direction in the afternoon, they provided us with a sort of reverse map.

A hard-to-spot arrow steering us through a squeeze.

Clockwise through the Fiery Furnace

In the afternoon, wanting to experience the maze in the reverse direction, we went against the directional arrows. I hoped to find all five of the maze’s hidden arches during our leisurely exploration. The trickiest part was finding our way back to the manmade stairs.

It took us more than 20 minutes to find the "entry" up to the stairs. Next time we'll trust our daughter's instincts. — It took us more than 20 minutes to find the “entry” up to the stairs. Next time we’ll trust our daughter’s navigational instincts.

Manmade stairs crafted into the rock to provide entry/exit. — Manmade stairs crafted from the rock to provide entry/exit.

My daughter took off ahead of us as though wanting to see how quickly we could do it the second time. I was still enjoying shooting photos with my DSLR camera. About a mile in we stopped at an open area for a snack and I explored an arch high up on a rock. Then wanting to do some more scrambling with hand free, I tucked my camera into my pack, leaving my cell phone in my pocket for snapshots.

Slickrock sandstone showing rounding from erosion. Rangers close the maze if there is any snowfall as the moisture makes footing treacherous and hides the washes and rocks where visitors must step. This was the last two-handed photo I took.

Karate Chop Mistake in the Fiery Furnace

Halfway through the maze, I got off-balance on a bit of steep rock. Thoughts raced through my head: “Protect the back, head, legs, hip, camera.” Somehow, I spun around, landing catlike in a sandy wash on both legs. I could tell both my husband and daughter were relieved it turned out so well. Unfortunately, I smashed my right wrist into a rock as I landed. I took one look at my throbbing hand, swelling and bent at an awkward angle. Had I just dislocated it?

It was more shocking than painful. Instinctively my Mountaineering-Oriented First Aid training kicked in. No tigers — the scene was safe. No bleeding or broken skin — nothing life-threatening. But I definitely needed a splint. I handed my pack to my daughter and asked for help getting out of my T-shirt to use as padding. I used my buff to keep my wrist supported and neutral, and my husband helped get the camera strap around my forearm as a sling. Later the doctors at the hospital were impressed with our in-the-field get-up.

Aftermath

I knew that above all else, I had to remain calm. I forced myself to take deep breaths and a few sips of water. We declined the assistance of another couple heading in the opposite direction, one of whom said she was a nurse. I suggested we go back the way we came, thinking it was shorter, but Doug reminded me that the first half of the route in front of us required less climbing.

With him ahead offering me a supporting hand if I needed it, I walked unaided to the car, breaking down in tears a few minutes after we resumed hiking, thinking of how I’d just screwed up our last family vacation. We drove directly to Moab’s Urgent Care where an on-call orthopedist reduced the break twice (far more painful than the fall itself) and set it, enabling me to walk out before sunset and before a snowstorm arrived.

Spires abound in the Fiery Furnace. Every few steps I wanted to stop and drink it all in. My happy place. And despite the accident I still want to go back some day. — Spires abound in the Fiery Furnace. Every few steps I wanted to stop and drink it all in. My happy place. And despite the accident I still want to go back someday.

What’s Next?

I have learned so many lessons in the past two weeks that I have decided to write another blog post about it. A few, briefly:

1. It will be a while before I can use my 100-400 mm lens or my DSLR camera, but it IS still possible to take one-handed lefty photos with my cell phone. Proof below, the night of my fall.

My newest accessory, a sling, following a broken wrist in Arches National Park's Fiery Furnace. — My newest accessory, a sling, followed a broken wrist in Arches National Park’s Fiery Furnace on 2-22-22.

2. Dictation, Hunt-and-peck, Notes on my phone can substitute for my journal habit. I am incredibly slow but as this Blog shows, dedication pays off.
3. Bones heal. The orthopedist got my wrist reduced and set well enough that I do NOT need surgery and that is a huge blessing. I am grateful it was not my head, back, legs, hip, or gear. Sure, it would be easier if it were my left, but I would still be hunting and pecking. The silver lining is I am becoming ambidextrous!
4. Remember Joyful from my last post? Even injured, I came away with many fond memories of our trip, despite the obstacles we faced from store closures to botched reservations, inclement weather to a trip to the hospital.

If you visit Arches National Park, stay on rock and sandy washes. Don’t “bust the crust.”

Reader Challenge

If you are up for an exercise in empathy, try two experiments:

1. With your non-dominant hand, grab a pen and write: I AM SO GRATEFUL FOR WHO I AM AND WHAT I CAN DO. I WILL NEVER TAKE MY LIFE FOR GRANTED AGAIN.
2. For an hour, be mindful of those many things you do with your dominant hand or with two hands. If you are feeling brave, try it with only one hand or with your opposite hand exclusively.

Hardest? Doing my hair. Zipping. Tying knots. Buttoning. Fastening my dog’s harness. Writing. I thought it would be driving, but that is pretty straightforward. And washing dishes or hair and vacuuming just take practice. Haven’t tried mowing yet. I’d love to see your comments about your experiment.

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A Hunt for Joy Inspired by Lee’s Book Joyful

This week I began listening to Ingrid Fetell Lee’s Joyful: The Surprising Power of Ordinary Things to Create Extraordinary Happiness. In it, she introduces ten aesthetics of joy. Yesterday I listened to her describe the first aesthetic, energy, which we get from vibrant color and light. Intrigued, I recalled my own post about joy back in December. And I decided I’d use Joyful as my guide on my hunt for joy.

A sign from the universe that has inspired my own hunt for joy.

Aesthetic 1: Color and Light

In the first section on color, Lee admits that as a former chromophobe, she once preferred whites or neutrals to bold colors. But when she moved into a living space with bright yellow walls, she kept them as they were. She became sold on the power of color to liven our moods.

I’ve intuitively added colorful stickers and inks to my journaling repertoire in recent years. Our gym pops with bold, energetic yellow, blue, and red. Could adding color to my wardrobe, my food, our garden bring more joy? I thought about my preference for outer layers that blend in with the environment rather than stick out.

Then I remembered the bright teal coat I received for Christmas. I smile every time I put it on. And the soft maroon Turtle Fur neck cover I wear on frosty mornings is as comforting as it is colorful. She may be onto something. The next time I shop for clothes, I promise to find one cheerful, bright item instead of another black, blue, dark green, or muted top. Just thinking about the possibilities gives me energy.

The first smiling daffodils of spring bring me joy. Is it from abundance or color -- or both? — The first smiling daffodils of spring bring me joy. Is it from abundance or color — or both?

Hunt for Joy 2: Abundance

In her section about abundance, which I listened to this morning, she describes how excited a “kid in the candy store” is as he “forages” for his next sugar high. I feel that way when I find a bush laden with ripe berries, a little free library or bookstore stocked with favorites, or a garden bursting with colorful blossoms and chirping birds.

Her discussion of over-abundance fascinated me. Overflowing landfills, an obesity epidemic, and hoarding are examples of how abundance can become maladaptive. I look forward to seeing if and how she addresses these in future chapters.

A chestnut-backed chickadee tending to its young.

Finding Freedom

This morning while walking my dog, I experienced several moments of joy that encapsulated energy, abundance, and the third aesthetic, freedom. While Ajax sniffed with renewed frenzy on a street we don’t often visit, I enjoyed the sights and sounds. Steller’s jays flew overhead. A dozen robins foraged for worms on an empty school playground. A trio of varied thrushes called to each other. Black-capped chickadees sang to attract a mate. And the sun poked through the clouds, sending happy beams down to cheer me. This is joy, I thought to myself.

While I haven’t listened to her section on freedom yet, I look forward to hearing what she says about open space, wildness, and nature. Every time I visit the mountains or a forest, I experience this joy aesthetic. And when I return with next week’s blog, I hope to share even more about my adventures in the hunt for joy.

Hunt for joy: finding baby animals in nature always makes me smile. — A perpetual hunt for joy: finding baby animals in nature always makes me smile.

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Cognitive Distortions and How to Overcome Them

This week I pondered a recent Precision Nutrition lesson about common cognitive distortions. These are inaccurate, negatively biased, habitual ways of thinking. On a birding trip to Monroe this morning, I reflected on three I used today. Herein I describe my efforts to overcome four cognitive distortions against the backdrop of the rare, beautiful Whooper Swan.

A rare look at the Whooper swan, the Eurasian counterpart to the North American trumpeter swan, spotted in Monroe, WA on 2.10.22. — A rare look at the yellow-billed Whooper swan, the Eurasian counterpart to the North American trumpeter swan we spotted in Monroe, WA on 2.10.22.

A Birding Outing to Monroe, WA

My husband, a friend, and I drove to Monroe early this morning. Our mission was to locate and photograph the rare Whooper Swan, the Eurasian counterpart to the North American trumpeter swan. We pulled up at the edge of one of the fields it had visited the day before. There, on the edge of a large flock of white fowl, stood the yellow-beaked Whooper Swan, feasting on grass. Chasing rarities doesn’t get any easier.

Both my husband and friend completed the Seattle Audubon Master Birder program several years ago. I joke that I’ve developed my birding knowledge “via osmosis.” While I appreciate birds, my first love remains mammals, evident from my volunteer time at the Woodland Park Zoo.

When our friend asked me if I’d ever seen a Townsend’s solitaire on any of my hikes, I told her, “I’d have to check my ebird list.” The Whooper Swan makes world bird species number 543 since I started keeping track twelve years ago. But I have a sucky birding memory. Enter Cognitive Distortions.

A pair of trumpeter swans coming in for a landing on a foggy Monroe morning. Note the massive wingspan, black bills, and webbed feet. — A pair of black-billed trumpeter swans coming in for a landing on a foggy Monroe morning. Note the massive wingspan and webbed feet.

Common Cognitive Distortions

I joined them on this outing partly to expand my mental and cognitive resilience. (What, wasn’t it for fun? Partly.) Aware that my list of to-do’s back home was getting long, I wanted to address several cognitive distortions:

Binary Thinking — either/or, all/nothing, black/white. I could either go birding or stay home and tackle my to-do list. Birding was a way for me to remind my brain about that nifty little word, and. Perhaps I could bird AND get my workout in, write my blog, finish eight pages of fiction…
Negative Mental Filter — seeing a rare bird would be a huge unexpected, unplanned-for experience, and would give me social time with my husband and friend. I’d be out in fresh air, taking cool photographs, and doing something new. I wanted to enjoy the positives and try to ignore that one nasty negative (not getting everything done on my list)…
Labeling — as in, “I have a sucky birding memory.” No, I’m an advanced beginner birder. Which is perfectly fine. Or better, I remember whatever I pay attention to. Perhaps I just need more time birding.
Shoulding All Over Yourself — ignoring the “You should do your strength workout; you should stay and write your blog post; you should get that piece to your readers so they have enough time.” What I wanted was to see swans. I love swans, geese, and ducks.

Photo from 12/19/10 showing the extreme size difference between swans and mallards. — Photo from 12/19/10 shows the extreme size difference between swans and mallards.

Overcoming Cognitive Distortions Takes Vigilance

As we took our last photos and returned to the car, I congratulated myself for getting out of the house and going on an adventure. I’d embraced the beginner’s mind (see January’s post) knowing that both my birding partners have far more knowledge and experience than I do.

Everything was great… until my friend offered to take me birding sometime. Before I could think, I heard the automatic words come out of my mouth. “Oh no, I’m not very good at it.” Aack! And I had been trying so hard! Will I be a WIP (Work In Progress) for the rest of my life?

Instead of saying “I failed!” I had to laugh. How much vigilance do I need to change them? Especially when I’ve been using them for decades. Tapping into my infantile growth mindset (and my friend’s kind words) I realized SHE offered to take ME. She wanted to pay it forward by teaching what she knows. I could accept her generous offer and have fun birding with someone new. Get a different perspective. She’d have company, I’d get more adventure. Win-win.

Juvenile Trumpeters, left, with the solitary mature Whooper Swan.

Overcoming Cognitive Distortions Takes Planning

I plan to move forward by taking the following steps:

Sharing my intentions with family members who can help me spot the cognitive distortions I’m using;
Noticing and Naming whenever I’m using one, so I bring increased awareness to my brain;
Writing them down, crossing out the distorted “untruth” and writing a “better truth” or “true truth”;
Celebrating whenever I stop mid-stream to check what’s coming out of my mouth. Becoming conscious.

Perhaps in doing so, not only can I change my brain’s programming, but I can also model how to overcome cognitive distortions for my colleagues, writing partners, clients, and daughter. In this way, I’m moving from “consciously incompetent” toward “consciously competent.” How about you?

Beautiful delicate dew-covered feather. Can we be as gentle with our cognitive distortions and change them into things of beauty that support us?

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How to Understand, Manage, and Overcome Fear

Recently a client asked me to discuss fear in a future blog post. I can only share from a coach’s perspective since I am not a psychotherapist. I approach such a complicated topic by focusing on a coping mechanism we all have access to. Preparation. Fear is our ally. It tries to protect us from something. If we can identify exactly what we are afraid of, we can figure out how to overcome fear.

Grizzly! On June 23, 2013, we were hiking in Yellowstone National Park. I wore a walking boot at the time with a horrible case of plantar fasciitis. We stepped off the trail, uphill, and let the grizzly have the path toward the lake. He sauntered by only rearing up once to see if we were a threat, and we lived to tell the tale.

Common Types of Fear

To overcome fear, first identify what you’re afraid of. For purpose of discussion, I only focus on three:

Fear of tangible, real, scary things — natural disasters, fires, war, getting lost, wild animal attacks, disease, injury, or illness. We may be afraid of something because of a traumatic event in the past, or we may have heard stories or seen images of scary events that we hope we never experience ourselves.
Fear of the unknown — this may be one of the biggest causes of anxiety, worry, and chronic stress — one look around you during a pandemic and you understand how potent and far-reaching such fear can be. Below, I share getting lost as a wilderness example.
Fear of failure — with its cousin, fear of success. Nearly everyone has felt one or the other at some point, especially when trying to make it in an area where it’s common to fail many times before finally succeeding.

Some things are worth being afraid of (i.e. category one), but often we’re afraid of things that haven’t happened — and may never happen — as in the other two categories. If we worry incessantly, we can make ourselves sick.

Overcome our fear: Knowing what weather you'll encounter, how your gear handles, and what to do if you have mechanical failure is part of being prepared. — Overcome our fear: Knowing what weather you’ll encounter, how your gear handles, and what to do if you have mechanical failure is part of being prepared.

The Fear Response

In simplest terms, when we fear something, we first turn toward the fear to identify what acute stress response we should have: whether we need to stick up for ourselves (Fight), run away (Flight), become legitimately scared (Fright), react like a deer-in-the-headlights (Freeze), or shut down completely (Faint).

Since prehistoric times, our bodies enter these stages to protect ourselves. In a frightening moment, our reptilian brains simply react. But what if we were proactive instead of reactive, and rehearsed ahead of time what we might do? By anticipating what could go wrong, we can plan responses and better manage our fear. At the moment, if we can take deep soothing breaths, we can access that thinking part of our brains to help us make solid choices.

We're going up THAT? If you notice a bodily sensation indicating fear, such as "sewing machine leg" on a rock climb, STOP, tell yourself there is no tiger nearby, take three deep breaths, and try again. You got this. — We’re going up THAT? If you notice a bodily sensation indicating fear, such as “sewing machine leg” on a rock climb, STOP, tell yourself there is no tiger nearby, take three deep breaths, and try again. You got this.

Overcome Fear of Scary Things: Bears

Take the example of fear of wild animals. From my first blog post in August, I shared an encounter with a black bear on a hike. Your natural instinct may be to freak out. Stop. Is the bear noshing on berries? Does she have cubs with her? Is she far enough away that giving her notice of your presence will make her move away?

Pair why you’re afraid (i.e. I don’t want the bear to maul me!) with knowledge of black bear behavior. They lack keen eyesight; they’re fiercely protective of their cubs; mostly, they’re just hungry and they don’t want to mess with people. Stay calm, so that your thinking brain remains in control. Make yourself appear larger by clicking your trekking poles together overhead, all the while calling, “Hey bear, bear, bear,” so you both keep your distance.

Black bear noshing on dandelions in Yellowstone National Park, June 27, 2015. Yes, we love bears.

First, we identified what we’re afraid of (the bear) and why (it could seriously hurt me). Our fear then tries to protect us. Within milliseconds, we identify the appropriate response. Flight (running) might cause the bear to give chase as though we’re prey. Freezing could surprise it if it continues toward us. Fainting? It could become curious about the peculiar smells and come closer. Fight? Uh, no. What’s left? Fright. Yes, of course, we’re scared. Normal. But by remaining calm, we keep our thinking brain in the game. A decision based on knowledge, and not raw emotion, gives us the very best option for safety.

Overcome Fear of the Unknown: Getting Lost

Getting lost is another common fear for people traveling alone in the wilderness. Easily preventable. We can learn and practice navigation skills. Have a map, compass, geolocator, and GPS whenever we hike. Tell people where we’ll be and when we expect to return. Travel with others with a stronger skill set so we can keep learning. And we can study the route we’re going to be traveling to increase our confidence.

While it’s unlikely you’ll get lost, that fear will actually spurn you on to get the knowledge, experience, and resourcefulness you need to prevent it. You will be hypervigilant on the trail so that you avoid it. And if you still get lost? You’ll figure out the best way forward, knowing that you did everything possible to prepare yourself.

A Few Good Survival Stories

But nothing guarantees success. What’s the worst that can happen if you do get lost? You’ll want to be self-sufficient for several days until someone can help you. That means having extra food, water, and clothing. Gary Paulsen wrote a Newbery award-winning book, Hatchet, about a boy surviving in the Canadian wilderness with a hatchet. Another fabulous Young Adult survival story with a female protagonist is I Am Still Alive by Kate Alice Marsall.

Overcome our fear of the unknown -- such as when we'll be able to stock up on key supplies. Remember the run on toilet paper in March, 2020? — Overcome our fear of the unknown — such as when we’ll be able to stock up on key supplies. Remember the run on toilet paper in March, 2020?

Overcome Fear of Failure

Perhaps the best way to manage a fear of failure is to get clear about what failure means to you. If you are on day four of a six-day climb and you abort, have you failed? You succeeded for four days. If you submit a manuscript to forty agents and never get a request for a full, have you failed? You put yourself out there forty times. If you have a health setback that shocks you to your core, have you failed? You’ve identified a new direction for yourself.

Never Quit

Dear readers, failure is never trying. As a coach, parent, athlete, and writer, I cannot stress this point enough. If your definition of failure includes quitting, and you keep trying new strategies to move forward, you cannot possibly fail. You may not reach the desired outcome the way you expected to, but that does not mean you have failed or you are a failure. As long as you are trying, learning, growing, and putting yourself out there, you can reach your objective. Keep trying.

Fear is a beautiful teacher. It shows us what is most important to us. Ask yourself why you are scared, whether there is any reason for it, and what you can do to help prepare yourself to succeed. In a scary moment, remember to take three long, deep breaths in through the nose, and twice as long exhaling through the mouth. Give your thinking, logical brain the space it needs to help you solve your problem. Go forth with courage and confidence.

Fear of wild animal attacks is a common one to have when hiking solo. But knowing about the animals you might encounter and what to do if you do can go a long way toward boosting your confidence and success on the trail. Cheetah at San Diego Wildlife Safari Park April 2014.

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How To Turn Harmful Labels Into Helpful Ones

I’ve spent weeks mulling over the idea of how labels identify us, categorize us, divide us, and in many cases, harm us. I don’t have any answers, just lots of questions. How can we turn harmful labels into helpful ones?

Democrats, Republicans. Independents. Rich. Poor. Middle class. Healthy. Sick. Victim. Patient. Selfish. Generous. Stingy. Ugly. Beautiful. Homeless. Jobless. Disabled. Ace. Gay. Pro-life. Pro-choice. Pro-guns.

We label everything. If it’s not “Me”, it’s apparently “Not-Me.” The Other. At times I wish “Comedian” fit me so I could turn a complicated, divisive subject into a humorous one.

Can't we all just get along? If we can learn how to turn harmful labels into helpful ones, will that help us live in peace and harmony? — Can’t we all just get along? If we can learn how to turn harmful labels into helpful ones, will that help us live in peace and harmony?

We Are Not Our Labels

Quick, think of the term “pink elephant” without picturing one. Impossible, right? Likewise, banana. Of course, your brain conjures up the item. What happens with the other labels, or professions? “Doctor,” “Nurse,” “Police,” and “Fireman” could bring to mind people in jobs we typically see as helpful. But even those labels carry negative connotations, for some, in certain areas of the country. The word “Teacher” may remind you of someone who positively impacted you. But what if the teacher you thought of scolded you? Punished you? Failed you? Or worse?

What do you picture when you hear “Homeless?” A beggar in rags? A starving young child in the back of a car? Or a struggling family losing everything to medical bankruptcy? “Disability” might make you think of someone with a visible physical limitation. Perhaps someone in a wheelchair or on crutches, rather than someone with an invisible hearing aid. “Heart attack?” Maybe a heavyset, sedentary older adult rather than a younger athlete. If there’s a point here, it’s that we are not our labels.

"Dog" can conjure up sweet images of puppies or horrific nightmares of attacking machines, depending on our unique experiences. — “Dog” can conjure up sweet images of puppies or horrific nightmares of attacking machines, depending on our unique experiences.

Do Harmful Labels Matter?

We’ve been socially trained to use labels as a way to categorize our multi-billion-member society and understand our place within it. Labels pigeonhole people and limit how others see them. People are not just their age, their biological sex, their skin color, their profession. They are not their ability or their religion.

Having so many “us/them” labels causes heightened anxiety not just for those being labeled, but also for those wanting to understand labels. My teen is still trying to help me figure out how the pronouns and letters work within the gender identity and LGBTQIA2s+ communities. But I’m starting to think, are we going too far? Are all these labels helpful? or harmful? Is there another way? What’s too much?

May we each have space to be our unique selves, wherever we are.

Focus on the Individual

A wise writer friend of mine shares the idea of forgetting labels entirely and seeing the UNIQUE INDIVIDUAL who may be suffering, angry, or happy. How can we get to know single people on their own merits without labels? Must we always take sides? What happens if we overlook or ignore the labels?

In a conversation with my critique partners this week, nearly everyone shared stories about their own harmful labels. I’m reminded of the children’s saying, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Hogwash. Sometimes words – labels – hurt far worse than physical objects.

I was recently handed labels that I refused to accept. Still, it’s caused plenty of anxiety. How can we stay true to ourselves in the face of dissension and strong opinion, especially when we dislike conflict? Do we accept those labels and knit them into our being, or can we deflect them?

One of my aspirations is to be the person my dog thinks I am.

Refuse Harmful Labels

What would happen if we refuse those harmful labels? Better yet, what if we created our own story with helpful labels? Eleanor Roosevelt’s wise words hang in my gym: “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

Instead of building a wall to shield ourselves from others, what if we surround ourselves with people who see us as unique, valuable individuals, who support our opinions and beliefs regardless of the labels we’ve been given?

If only we could let harmful labels cascade off our backs like a waterfall.

If we’ve been labeled “highly anxious,” “quitter,” or “liar,” for example, can we cultivate in ourselves the “opposite” of those labels? Can we mimic the courage of a firefighter, the persistence of someone learning to walk again after a stroke, or the resilience of the cheerful street performer living in a park? Ah, now those labels — positive words, values anyone can have — help.

We must stand up for what we believe in: our values and principles. Even if it makes us unpopular, and even if it’s hard. If we continue to do what we believe is right, we can live our most authentic lives and treat others the way we want to be treated, as individuals. Labels can simply fall by the wayside.

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How to Reframe Negatives into Motivating Positives

Traumatic events test the foundation your life is built on. They might even pummel you to the ground. If you get beaten down, how do you find the courage and strength to pull yourself together and keep going? One solution may be by learning how to reframe negatives into motivating positives.

Sunsets remind me that tomorrow is another day. Reframe negatives into motivating positives. — Sunsets remind me that tomorrow is another day. I’m learning how to reframe negatives into motivating positives.

How Reframing Works

Last week I introduced the concept of the five-minute action. A trick I explored this week is looking at negative or stressful events in a new way. Before you say, “I don’t want to read about dread, worry, anxiety, and bad habits. Just teach me how to get unstuck!” consider this: what if we look at them as coping strategies that are simply trying to help us?

To reframe something means to look at it in a different, more positive way. When you have a bad experience, try asking yourself open-ended questions to find the “silver lining.” Perhaps you learned something new about yourself. Or you met someone kind and helpful you might not have otherwise met. Maybe you learned how imperative it is to never have that same experience again.

An “open-ended question” is one that cannot be answered with simple one-word responses such as “yes, no, or maybe.” Such questions require deliberate thought, usually phrased with words like who, what, where, when, and how. Some examples might include, “How might you view that experience in a way that doesn’t increase anxiety?” or “What takeaway lesson did you learn about yourself or others that might help you in the future?”

My favorite canine hiking companion, basking in the sun on the cover of our hot tub. We're taking it easy right now partly so he can rest his right front leg. — My favorite canine hiking companion, basking in the sun on the cover of our hot tub. We’re taking it easy right now, partly so he can rest his right front leg.

Reframe Negatives: A Snowstorm’s Silver Lining

The most memorable example I can share is about returning to Seattle from a holiday visit in North Carolina years ago. My family got caught in bad weather in the middle of the United States. Our connecting flight had been overbooked while others were getting rescheduled for the next day. Staying overnight was not an option for us, as hotels were all booked. The airline attendant helped find an earlier flight for my husband connecting through Denver, while my daughter and I waited for a direct flight that would take off for Seattle an hour later.

The silver lining — and what I remember most about what could have been a major headache — was flying first-class with my daughter. We landed at SeaTac Airport just a few minutes after my husband, due to more flight delays. We did not have to camp out in an airport like many people across the midwest, nor did we have to travel separated in economy class. Conditions that could have ruined our trip actually left us with pleasant memories. The bonus? Our bags somehow made it home before we did!

A mural on a retaining wall at one of the local houses during an exploration walk with Ajax. I've pounded the pavement in our neighborhood some 7100 hours during the past 6.5 years and I continue to see something new every single day. — A mural on a retaining wall at one of the local houses during an exploration walk with Ajax. I’ve pounded the pavement in our neighborhood some 7100 hours during the past 6.5 years and I continue to find something new every single day.

What Do Bad Habits Say That’s Positive About You?

Similarly, try reframing any bad habits you want to change. What’s good about that habit? If you spend a few hours watching a movie with your spouse, dog, and kids, think about what such a choice might say about you besides “I know better. I’m too lazy and I never get enough sleep.”

Maybe it means that you’re doing your best to spend time with your family. It might mean that you’re giving yourself some much-needed downtime following a stressful day of work. Perhaps you value doing things together instead of isolating on cell phones. Watching a documentary and discussing what you’ve seen could also educate and inspire younger family members. Not to mention it allows you to keep tabs on everyone when being out and about might be considered unsafe.

My daughter with a wide assortment of ribbons. I used to worry about becoming a "helicopter parent" until I learned how to loosen the reins and let her make mistakes -- and learn from them. — My daughter with a wide assortment of ribbons. I veered away from becoming a “helicopter parent” and learned how to let my daughter make her own mistakes — and learn from them.

Identify What May Be More Helpful

If it is still a habit you really want to change, what habit might you put in its place? If you want to stop drinking every evening, perhaps you could try replacing alcohol with seltzer and lime. Maybe you could unwind by taking an after-dinner stroll or easy bike ride. If you still want to watch TV, consider setting a timer or alarm clock at a specific time to remind you when to turn off screens and shift gears into preparing for sleep.

Bad habits do not make you a bad person, just like traumatic events don’t define you. Try reframing your habits and seeking the silver lining in the negative events. Then share your experiences in the comments below. And if you need help making changes, I would love to start a dialog with you about how coaching can help you do so.

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Five Minute Actions Help You Achieve Important Goals

One of my projects this year is to complete a certificate course through Precision Nutrition focused on rest, recovery, and resilience. Such a course couldn’t come at a better time. Hopefully, it will be chock full of wonderful nuggets to share with my loyal readers. The idea of taking some five minute actions to get yourself moving perfectly matches the other ideas I’ve introduced over the last month.

The snow-covered trail to the summit of Mt. Teneriffe, January 2021.

Tips for Getting Unstuck: a Review

To review, on New Year’s Day, I wrote about keeping it simple and good enough (kisage). By doing so, we give ourselves permission to make mistakes, to develop a growth mindset, and to eliminate the need to do things perfectly.

Right before Christmas, I shared the importance of finding joy in the smallest of pleasures. We can get so busy that we take things for granted. By slowing down, we can appreciate the small things that bring us great joy. After all, we remember moments, not days.

And a month ago, on December 8, I described how to focus on doing one thing to get unstuck. That way, you can keep in mind your highest priority for the day, even if it changes from one day to the next. It helps us avoid overwhelm and prevents us from getting mired in long to-do lists.

Five-minute actions: this ice cream cone was literally a race against time. The air temperature was quickly rising and rain was making the snow very heavy and slushy. But a five-minute "let's just see how it is" led to an "hour tower" worthy of a picture. — Five-minute action: building this ice cream cone was literally a race against time. The air temperature was quickly rising and rain was making the snow very heavy and slushy. But a five minute “let’s just see how the snow feels” led to an “hour tower” worthy of a picture and memories.

The Idea Behind Five Minute Actions

How can taking a five-minute action help? It creates a tiny bit of positive momentum that helps you get unstuck. You’re probably thinking, “But clutter busting my house will take weeks, maybe even months.” Or maybe, “That’s insane. I can’t prepare to climb Mt. Rainier in five minutes.” And trust me, I’ve said it myself: “There’s no way I can even think about writing a book in five minutes.”

I hear you.

BUT… what five-minute action COULD you take that will get you one step closer to your goal?

Let’s use this week’s blog post as an example. I started thinking about it several days ago. It was on my “shortlist” yesterday, but it was not my “one thing.” Today, it was my ONE THING. Yet, I still couldn’t get started.

I took a five-minute action for one of my Capture Your 365 prompts, "green" on January 3, by getting myself out the door so I could spot this wonderful face on a clump of grass. — I took a five-minute action for one of my Capture Your 365 prompts, “green” on January 3, by getting myself out the door so I could find this wonderful face on a clump of grass.

Finally, I reminded myself to pick a five minute task. It could be anything. I chose to look for a few photographs to go with my post.

Before I knew it, I had chosen six pictures that represented different aspects of taking a five minute action. Then, I wrote my first paragraph. I came up with some headings. Before long, I had half the blog. And all it took was committing to taking one five-minute action.

I love the image of stalactites and stalagmites and how mightily they grow with tiny actions over many years. The icicle is another example of tiny actions making a difference. The key is to stay consistent with whatever habit you choose to build. You WILL get there.

How Five Minute Actions Work in Fitness

I have used a variation on this idea with my Body Results clients, too. If you’re having trouble committing to doing an entire strength workout or going for an hour-long walk, commit to taking a five minute action.

Set out your workout clothes. Fill your water bottle with ice. Call a friend to meet you at the trailhead. Walk to the mailbox. Show up at the gym and get warmed up. By setting your intention and just starting, you overcome inertia and create positive momentum.

You can even promise yourself, “If I’m not feeling it after five minutes, I can stop.” Nine times out of ten, by the end of five minutes, you’ll keep going since you’ve already started. Similarly, with the example of working on my blog post, after five minutes I couldn’t just stop. Try it, it really works.

Another of our recent snow creations. This year we built Stuart, a minion from Despicable Me, this bear climbing a tree to get honey, and the hand holding an ice cream cone shown above.

Will Five Minute Actions Work with Anything?

I challenge my readers to find something that does NOT have any five-minute actions associated with it. Your homework, should you care to participate, is to find a goal that is important to you and figure out several steps you need to take to get it done.

Can you take five minutes to schedule an hour for quality time with your spouse or child? What about emailing an accountability partner who will help you stick to your workout goals? Could you commit one five minute block of time, every single day, to work on your manuscript? Would it help to have a guide service send you information about a climb that you could post on your fridge or at your desk for motivation?

Anyone can find five minutes. The key is to do this consistently. Move forward, even if it’s just a small five minute action every day. They accumulate, and sometimes they grow into larger blocks of time. Before you know it, you’ll have made a sizable dent.

If you are unable to break your goal down into smaller steps, post a question on my blog and I’ll help you figure out what step you need to take to get some momentum. Remember, you’re not looking for perfect, you’re trying to get unstuck. The blog post is complete, and all it took was starting with a five-minute action.

The author, hugging a local tree. You got this!

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Keep It Simple And Good Enough in Your 2022 Goals

You may have noticed in the past six months that I adore playing with words. In October, I coined OcTraPiMo for “October Trash Pick-up Month.” To kick off the new year, my accountability partner, Elena Hartwell Taylor, a developmental editor at Allegory Editing, suggested a new word from a phrase I used. Keeping it “Simple And Good Enough.” Introducing ‘SAGE‘, or “avoiding perfection.”

Keep it simple and good enough. The snow might not have been right for rolling big creations, but with snow molds, we could still create snow penguins for our deck railing.

Make Mistakes

Perfection is an illusion I’m more than ready to let go of. Instead of setting resolutions this year, I’m going to embrace making mistakes. The more the better. Because that means I’m trying new things and stretching outside of my comfort zone.

One caveat: meet Making Mistakes’ big brother, Learning From Them. We must learn so we don’t make the same ones again. I have made (and continue to make) tons of mistakes in my life, some of which I’ve learned from, others I haven’t. I want to explore the silver linings. To embrace the changes that come from trying something new and discovering things I never knew before. Like our annual tradition of taking the Polar Bear Plunge in Lake Washington on New Year’s Day.

Make Simple and Good Enough Goals You Can Keep

As a trainer, most of the year I teach clients about setting SMART goals – making them Specific, Measurable, Action-oriented, Realistic, and Time-stamped. I am not a fan of page-turn resolutions as I know most of them fail within the first month of a new year. My plan to “keep it simple and good enough” inspires playfulness rather than dread. If I don’t think I can consistently drink 65 ounces of water (half your body weight in ounces gives you your target to consume daily), what if I start by increasing my consumption from 32 to 40? Then maybe 48? An eight-ounce glass a day. Surely I could do that, no problem. Consistency and playfulness, not perfection.

Pinocchio Penguin with an icicle nose. Playfulness at its best.

What Simple and Good Enough Might Inspire

What if we accepted 85% rather than 100%? We spend 85% of our time getting that last 15% of any project finished. If we said, “good enough” and put that time toward other things that are more important, how could our lives change? What would happen if, during the holidays, you only sent five cards rather than fifty? Or if you sent gifts a week later than normal? I tried both this year. The earth kept revolving. Which would you prefer, completing THE one most important thing each day, or staring at a list of twenty, stuck, overwhelmed, increasing your blood pressure, and doing nothing? What if you could only make one annual commitment to yourself? What would yours be?

A blog post would not be complete without a shot of my partner-in-climes, Ajax. We go out in all weather, rain or shine, snow or hail.

Be Willing to Be a Beginner

I’m going to work on changing my mind. Not in a wishy-washy way, but intentionally, to reset neural pathways so that I embrace novelty and change. I want to cultivate a beginner’s mindset for everything I try instead of expecting perfection on the very first try. Nobody shows mastery of anything the first time. It takes more than 10,000 hours to master something!

I’ve spent over twenty-five years learning about wellness and fitness, not web design. As my husband and I revamp our website (with a developer’s help), I know we’re going to make plenty of mistakes. And that’s okay. I embrace, in Carol Dweck’s words, a growth mindset. It might be stressful at times, but if we keep the end goal in mind and see what we can learn in the process, it might be more enjoyable.

Snow falling on the Olympic Hills mascot, the otter, and his enclave, a few blocks from our Seattle home.

Simple and Good Enough Inspires Play

What “good enough” inspires in me is spending more time doing fun, playful things with my family. As an example, over the holidays we got 6-8 inches of snow. I took time out to go sledding the day after Christmas several hours after we got fresh powder. I went cross-country skiing two days later, first thing in the morning before starting my appointments.

As the weather inched up to just above freezing, my husband and I grabbed a few hours to build a Snow Minion. Did I finish all my work those days? Not quite. But holidays are meant to be enjoyed. Did the world fall apart because I was a few days delayed on work? Nope. Did I feel better getting personal joy into the mix? Absolutely.

The author and her husband, creators of Stuart the one-eyed minion from Despicable Me. The snow was not perfect -- it took multiple attempts to get a ball to roll -- but we pounced on the several-hour window of "good enough" warming to make this cute critter. He's not perfect - he's white, not yellow, and his bamboo hair sticks straight up instead of a comb-over, but "he's good enough." — The author and her husband, creators of Stuart the one-eyed minion from Despicable Me. The snow was not perfect — it took multiple attempts to get a ball to roll — but we pounced on the several-hour window of “good enough” conditions to make this cute critter. He’s not perfect – he’s white, not yellow, and his bamboo hair sticks straight up instead of a comb-over, but “he’s good enough.”

So try it yourself. Keep it simple and good enough. Make mistakes and learn from them. Harvest a beginner’s mind and cultivate a growth mindset. And most importantly, let yourself play. May these be the resolutions you carry forward into 2022.

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How To Increase Movement During High-Stress and Winter

Some of my clients recently asked for strategies to increase movement during the holidays. They expressed concerns about diminished activity due to numerous video conferences. My own client sessions have become less active since I started hosting them on Zoom. I still demonstrate exercises, but mostly I supervise clients completing their workouts at their homes while I stand at my treadmill desk screen.

Note the operative words: stand and treadmill desk. Grab every opportunity to stand instead of sit. If you have an adjustable desk and can stand for at least half your work time, great. Build opportunities to walk during work meetings or phone calls. My hiking buddy actually started a conference as we returned to our cars after a recent hike. Increase daily movement however you can.

Increase movement. Our home gym is equipped with a Versa Climber, elliptical, rower, Jacob's Ladder, and (right) treadmill where my second work station is set up. I write close to half my blog posts while walking on it. — Our home gym is equipped with a Versa Climber, elliptical, rower, Jacob’s Ladder, and (right) treadmill where my second work station is set up. I write close to half my blog posts while walking on it.

Below I present suggestions for moving more, encouraging wellness at home, and maintaining hiking mileage during winter.

Increase Movement During Breaks

Sometimes improving your situation and getting unstuck is as simple as having the right person to mirror and guide you and provide accountability. If you're interested in receiving customized coaching, contact Court@bodyresults.com. — Sometimes improving your situation and getting unstuck is as simple as having the right person to mirror and guide you as well as provide accountability. If you’re interested in receiving customized coaching, contact Court@bodyresults.com.

Set an alarm. Remind yourself to move every hour. Use five minutes to stretch, toss laundry in the drier, place dishes in the dishwasher, or vacuum.
Play music. Vigorously dance to encourage blood flow. Not only is this fun, but it will help minimize brain fog and maximize alertness.
Incorporate movement at your desk. Set up a work station at your treadmill, use an exercycle, or try a step-in-place device. Set up stretching bands, TRX loops or a pullup bar and grab a few repetitions as a break.
Plan short breaks between video sessions. Grab a 15-minute walk in the neighborhood, hug your pet or child, get a healthy snack, or sit outside in the sun and ground barefoot. (Yes, even in the dead of winter I include barefoot time whenever it’s not freezing, snowing, or pouring)

The author grounding on December 19, a rare sunny winter day when the sun was out.

Take Additional Steps Toward Health at Home

Keep water nearby at all times. Divide your body weight (in pounds) by two and try to consume that number of ounces every day. A person who weighs 150 pounds should shoot for drinking 75 ounces each day. Add to that if you’re exercising vigorously for an extended period of time (i.e. hiking). Once you empty your water bottle, get up and fill it. The tactile reminder will encourage you to move more often.
Make it hard to get easily-consumed, high caloric density snacks. Even better, don’t buy them; once you bring junk food in the house, you’ll either eat it or throw it out. Have ready-made hummus, veggies, hard-boiled eggs, sliced fruit, or nuts to eat instead.
Include a few options for managing stress. Try taking deep, cleansing breaths whenever you feel stressed, trying the suggestions above, or simply stare out the window and let your mind wander.
Nap! If you find yourself dozing off or getting increasingly frustrated and you have the luxury of twenty minutes, grab a catnap. Much better than using caffeine or sugar to temporarily provide a boost.

Maintain Mileage and Gain During Winter Months

If you enjoy hiking year-round and you want to maintain your mileage and gain during cold and snowy weather, try the following suggestions.

Explore more-frequented trails near the city. This time of year, Pacific Northwest Trails are relatively empty. Cougar Mountain and Tiger Mountain both have tons of great low-elevation trails that provide wonderful hiking opportunities without much snow.
Consider doing “laps” on a lower elevation hike. Cougar Mountain, for example, has plenty of miles of trails that you can link into longer outings. On a hike two weeks ago, I completed the Big Tree Ridge Trail twice for over nine miles and 2700 feet of elevation gain. It all counts toward maintaining your hiking fitness.
Plan hikes with work companions or, like my buddy did two weeks ago, start a conference call toward the end of your outing to squeeze fitness into your hectic day.
Carry a pack at least once a week to maintain in-season fitness levels so that when you start ramping up you don’t have to start from scratch.
Complete urban workouts with a pack. Hikes are not the only way to carry weight! Walk to the library to check out or return books, or visit the grocery store and carry groceries home in a pack. I seldom use my car unless I have to drive more than a few miles. I combine local errands with dog walking and pack carrying so we’re both happy. Added benefit? We’re doing our part to save fuel and promote clean green living.

Descending the Big Tree Ridge trail through some ... not-so-big trees. Switchbacks indicate STEEPNESS. — Descending the Big Tree Ridge trail through some … not-so-big trees. Switchbacks indicate STEEPNESS.

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Slow Down to Find Joy in Simple Pleasures

Napoleon Hill said, “Action is the real measure of intelligence.” I have always prided myself on getting things done. But we are human beings, not human doings. In a pandemic world where everything moves at lightning speed, it’s challenging to slow down. It’s even harder to make enduring change. You may recall that it took me seven years to launch this blog.

Other times, things change in a heartbeat. Following the stressful events of last week, I’ve identified areas I want to change in 2022. I want to let go of the illusion of perfection, eliminate the word “should” from my vocabulary, seek out and enjoy tiny daily pleasures, and slow down before the good stuff passes by.

The ten-foot tall snowman my husband, daughter and I built during perfect snow conditions in February, 2021. Slow down and enjoy. — Snow brings me immense joy. My husband, daughter, and I built this ten-foot-tall snowman during perfect conditions in February 2021.

What Brings You Joy?

My family, physical activity, writing, photography, animals, nature, and helping others top my list. What’s on yours? May this post be an invitation to notice and name what brings you joy.

Whenever I experience a lack in any of the above areas, I overcompensate in others. Last week my journal became my salvation. I wrote more than thirty pages. As things return to normal, I feel compelled to pair seasonal images of family joy with the discoveries in this post.

However you celebrate the holidays, my hope is that you’re with loved ones doing things that bring you joy, no matter how big or small.

A brave flower peeking through the soil following February's snowfall, 2021. — A brave flower peeking through the soil following February’s snowfall, 2021.

Slow Down and Enjoy Moments of Gratitude

The first thing I noticed at the end of last week’s event was a bright sunbeam peeking out of the clouds, illuminating the tile at my feet and bringing a smile to my face. As I headed outside, I stopped to caress the wilted buds on a bush. I dropped to a knee and skimmed my hand along the tops of frozen, brittle blades of grass.

I deeply inhaled the frigid cold air, trying to bring a gallon into my lungs. As my husband and I walked, I marveled at the crunch of the grass, the uneven surface of the gravel, the smooth pavement. At the gulls and crows soaring overhead. A squirrel darted away, a prized nut in its mouth. We meandered slowly, intentionally absorbing every detail. I wanted to hold onto this moment of blissful freedom, enjoying everything Mother Nature offered.

Ajax and the author's attempt to make a snow dog in his likeness during last February, 2021's snowstorm in Seattle. Snow Play Seasonal Pleasures — Ajax and the author’s attempt to make a snow dog in his likeness during last February 2021’s snowstorm in Seattle.

The Joy of Coming Home

Once in the doorway of our home, I dropped to my knees to let Ajax bathe my face and hands in kisses, wagging full-body around me countless times. Did the four days feel to him like four years? He’s been my shadow since we got him in July of 2015, and my steady hiking companion for the past two years. Everyone should be so lucky as to know the bliss of a pup’s unconditional love.

As I continued through the house, I marveled at the soft lighting, the familiar smells, the peaceful quiet. The comforts of everything we’ve chosen to adorn our home. A refrigerator with wholesome, nourishing food. A yard to enjoy in all seasons. The most comfortable bed on the planet. My gym and workstation. A hot tub to enjoy after long hikes. Signs of my family. Our decorated tree. There truly is no place like home.

Ajax at eight weeks old and the author's daughter cuddling July 2015. — Ajax at eight weeks old and the author’s daughter cuddling July 2015.

Slow Down to Notice Signs

Yesterday I received a newsletter from a journaling association I’ve followed for several years. Normally I’d hit delete, as I recently tried to reduce clutter from my inbox. Not only did I open it, but as I scrolled down, the following poem jumped out. Did this person somehow inhabit my brain? With Lynda Monk’s permission, I share it below in hopes that it delights you as much as it did me. (Bold highlights are mine)

Another neighborhood creation, Bigfoot lounging on front steps.

For One Who Is Exhausted, a Blessing

By John O’Donohue

When the rhythm of the heart becomes hectic,
Time takes on the strain until it breaks;
Then all the unattended stress falls in
On the mind like an endless, increasing weight.

The light in the mind becomes dim.
Things you could take in your stride before
Now become laborsome events of will.

Weariness invades your spirit.
Gravity begins falling inside you,
Dragging down every bone.

The tide you never valued has gone out.
And you are marooned on unsure ground.
Something within you has closed down;
And you cannot push yourself back to life.

Empty Time

You have been forced to enter empty time.
The desire that drove you has relinquished.
There is nothing else to do now but rest
And patiently learn to receive the self
You have forsaken in the race of days.

At first your thinking will darken
And sadness take over like listless weather.
The flow of unwept tears will frighten you.

You have traveled too fast over false ground;
Now your soul has come to take you back.

Take refuge in your senses, open up
To all the small miracles you rushed through.

Become inclined to watch the way of rain
When it falls slow and free.

Imitate the habit of twilight,
Taking time to open the well of color
That fostered the brightness of day.

Draw alongside the silence of stone
Until its calmness can claim you.
Be excessively gentle with yourself.

Stay clear of those vexed in spirit.
Learn to linger around someone of ease
Who feels they have all the time in the world.

Gradually, you will return to yourself,
Having learned a new respect for your heart
And the joy that dwells far within slow time.

If you would like to receive inspiration and ideas for your own journal writing journey, get a free journaling gift from the International Association for Journal Writing. And if you have any questions about how journal writing might help you, please post them in the comments box.

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Capture a Photo-A-Day to Celebrate Your Year

In January of 2017, a friend and I embarked on a photo-a-day journey together. Our goal was to take at least one photograph each day for an entire year. At the end of 2019, Katrina Kennedy, the originator of CY365 (Capture Your 365), turned her focus toward Pinterest. Since then, my buddy and I have recycled Kennedy’s CY365 prompts from 2018 and 2019. If you’re looking for a new idea to sweep you into 2022 with creativity and energy, read on.

On January 2, 2017, the CY365 photo-a-day prompt was something like "Word". I chose courage as my word for 2017 and it's suited me well ever since. — On January 2, 2017, the CY365 daily prompt was something like “Word”. I chose *courage* as my word for 2017 and it’s suited me well ever since.

What Photo-A-Day Prompts Did For Me

Not only has our daily practice improved my skills and competence, but it’s taught me how to truly see beauty in the mundane. Following the “Capture Your 365” daily prompts taught me a number of valuable lessons:

You don’t need a lot of time to pursue your goals, but you do need consistency
Doing something for a few minutes daily hones your eye, skill, practice, and interest in something
Using a prompt helped narrow down the possibilities, as writing prompts do for writers faced with a blank page
The lessons provided through CY365 taught me how to see and what to appreciate — what matters most to me
Having a photography accountability partner helped increase my consistency
Seeing how my partner interpreted the prompts gave me additional ideas of things to try with my own craft
Nearly five years of daily photography has provided me with plenty of visual material for my blog. Unless noted for a particular photograph, I have shot every photo I post on my blog.

My photogenic dog Ajax has been the source of many hundreds of photographs.

A New Idea: 31 Prompts

For 2022, we’ve decided to try something new. Instead of repeating the 2018 prompts again, we will each come up with, and share, a month’s worth of prompts. We’ll follow one set of suggestions for the odd months and the other during even months. As a bonus, we can see if any trends evolve from six photographs in each of the sixty categories.

While my offering won’t be presented in as elegant a format as Katrina’s, perhaps it will inspire another reader to pick up a cell phone or DSLR and capture their own 365.

The author and Ajax pose on the summit of Mailbox Peak.

Week 1

D1: Inspiration
D2: Favorite
D3: Green
D4: Circles
D5: Landscape
D6: Self-portrait
D7: Family

Week 2

D8 Blue
D9 Often Overlooked
D10 Water
D11 Confidence
D12 Illuminated
D13 Children
D14 Pink

Week 3

D15 Nature
D16 Sweet treat
D17 Spiral
D18 Friendship
D19 Purple
D20 Books
D21 Rainbow

On "Pi day" (March 14) we sometimes make a berry pie to celebrate, a photo that could match either the "sweet treat" or "purple" prompt. — On “Pi day” (March 14) we sometimes make a berry pie to celebrate, a photo that could match either the “sweet treat” or “purple” prompt in week three.

Week 4

D22 Snack
D23 White
D24 Generosity
D25 Repetition
D26 Entertaining
D27 Photographer’s choice
D28 Sports

Week 5

D29 Love
D30 Favorite color
D31 Inside

How this technique can work in other areas

Lest you wonder what on earth this has to do with making change… read on! While I was waiting for a timed animal observation during a recent Colobus monkey watch at Woodland Park Zoo, I created several lists like the one above. One included 31 tips for extreme self-care, from petting a dog to getting a massage to having a special meal.

The other included 31 tips to get more exercise into your life. You could use the exact same technique for whatever routine area of your life you would like to “Gamify” (i.e. make more fun) while adding some sparkle and novelty. Perhaps you’d like to be more consistent with your writing. Can you make a fun list of 31 writing-related tasks? Or maybe you want to come up with free fun things to do with your family. Try a shoebox filled with 31 ideas.

The more fun you can inject into your prompts, the more likely you are to do whatever it is you’re putting off. This technique allows you to trick the left part of your brain that falls into habits easily and allows for the more creative right part to get involved. As an extra holiday bonus for you, by sharing in the comments your own top five tips for either “extreme self-care” or “adding more exercise”, I will send you my complete list of 31 in either category. Gamify! Game on! Happy holidays!

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How To Practice Gratitude To Get Unstuck

Aesop said, “Gratitude turns what we have into enough.” The past two weeks have been painful in ways I won’t divulge. But what matters is navigating through the pain and emerging unscathed–perhaps even stronger–on the other side. One useful habit I’ve developed over the past year has been to express and keep track of gratitude. Doing so helps me minimize the suck while remembering and appreciating the good. It’s there if we only look for it. As we approach Thanksgiving, perhaps practicing gratitude can help you get unstuck, too.

Grateful for: Little Free Libraries within walking distance of home. Splashes of color (pumpkins) and whimsy (pelican carving). Blue sky during a period of time when all we have are rain clouds.

What Started as a Weekly Exchange…

Doris Day said, “Gratitude is riches. Complaint is poverty.” Two years ago today, my mother and I decided to embark on a weekly e-mail exchange. We would share one positive thing that we’re grateful for from that week. It could be small, such as having a conversation with a stranger at the coffee shop. Or huge, such as having a loved one finally coming home to recover after major surgery.

Not only did it keep us in touch with each other week after week, but it also gave us valuable insights into what we each notice and hold dear. Hearing about her struggles and successes from thousands of miles away helped me relate to her more even though we haven’t been able to see each other for a long time.

Practicing Gratitude: Connections with family. Author with her daughter and parents in Asheville, NC April 2019. — Visiting my parents in Asheville, NC April 2019. (Yes, my daughter, left, is over six feet tall)

You can do the same with a friend, loved one, writing partner, or training partner, sort of like the accountability partner I introduced earlier. You can also keep it private, in a gratitude notebook. See what you come up with. Having now kept a record for two years, I can look back at our earlier exchanges. I remember exactly what was going on that prompted each gratitude, a “week-at-a-glance” journal.

…Provides Examples Spanning Two Years

Rather than complaining about the past two weeks (poverty! no!), I thought I’d review just a few from the past two years (riches, indeed!) Your gratitude list will obviously differ from mine, but this gives you an idea of how diverse, healing, and nurturing such a list can be.

Grateful for beauty everywhere, if we only pay attention to and look for it.

Practicing Gratitude for Family Experiences

A wonderful vacation to the South and Stewart Islands of New Zealand, merely months before COVID hit
Help from my husband and daughter in treating a hard-to-reach lesion on my back (no surgery, thankfully!)
A trip to Yellowstone National Park that resulted in great nature experiences

The author and her husband in Yellowstone National Park. Photo by B. Schurman.

A visit to the Coast to camp, birdwatch, and escape a heatwave in Seattle
My daughter soaring through her online AP exams with college credit for all of them
Touring UW campus and helping my daughter submit a college application and FAFSA form

Practicing Gratitude for People

Hearty laughs and connections in unexpected places that remind me of the humor instilled in me by my birth family
Writing partners in the Seattle community who offer overall encouragement and support and remind me that I’m not alone, even if meetings have to be via Zoom
Body Results clients who keep returning for guidance, wisdom and inspiration
A deepening friendship with my accountability partner and Developmental Editor at Allegory Editing

Practicing Gratitude for Ongoing Occurrences

Recurring Zoo shifts that deepen my respect and appreciation for the animal kingdom
62 mostly-solo injury-free hikes to a wide variety of destinations in the state of Washington
Seeing my daughter perform in uniform on the football field (flute in marching band) her senior year

The author's daughter (center, on flute) performing with the marching band during half time. — The author’s daughter (center, on flute) performing with the marching band during half time.

Fixing our pond so the water flows clean and clear
Keeping a blog since July to capture the wonderful moments and share with readers
Identifying what is beautiful, to me, in nature and shooting it with my camera

Cultivate An Attitude of Gratitude

Robert Brault said, “Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” We take for granted much of what we have until we no longer have it. Our freedom to congregate. Freedom to hike. To go to restaurants, stores, plays, movies. While some (well, okay, many) of our freedoms feel compromised over the past two years, we still have so much to appreciate.

Just this week, Victoria Peters, one of my Monday morning critique partners, reminded me how important it is for us to “Be here, right now, at this moment.” Anna Colpitts pointed out how much she enjoyed my behind-the-scenes tour of Woodland Park Zoo and blog posts about hikes she’ll never do (but appreciates.) Roma Anjoy reminded us that we each have the right to choose — which extends to our attitude as well. Absent this week but always present in spirit, Susan Ferguson has been a role model, inviting me to join the EPIC board (three years) and participate on the WOTS Steering Committee (three years).

And that idea about trading gratitudes with my mom? I borrowed that from Jeanne Gerhard, a friend I met at Write on the Sound nine years ago when we were both looking for connections and information about writing. I am forever grateful for each of my Monday Morning critique partners who have stood beside me for eight years and who help me get unstuck time and again.

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Do the Zoo for a Brand New You

After our dog Emily died on June 28, 2012, I drifted in a grief cloud for many months. But two positives emerged from that period: I started attending the annual Write on the Sound conference in Edmonds, and I became a volunteer at Woodland Park Zoo. Both experiences have enriched my life in more ways than I can count. If you are considering ways to give back to the Seattle community and you love animals, join me on a virtual volunteering tour to see how to do the Zoo for a brand new you.

Red pandas, related to raccoons and not at all to giant pandas, are a popular animal at Woodland Park Zoo.

Do the Zoo: Animal Watches

One of my favorite shifts this past year since the Zoo has invited volunteers back has been participating in animal watches. On a watch, volunteers spend several hours with a particular animal or group of individuals, noting every five or ten minutes what they’re doing. While my Animal Unit Volunteer (AUV) position helping with the giraffes remains closed, I’ve shifted time to animal watches.

I’ve won lottery shifts for three different animal watches: Alpine keas, Komodo dragons, and Colobus monkeys. All three animals are in exhibits I don’t often visit. Spending time with them teaches me more about their natural behavior and provides details and stories I then share with guests.

Komodo Dragons

I’ve been fortunate enough to see Barani and Nakal, the two Komodo dragons, climb the walls in their new exhibits and dig in their sand pits. These endangered lizards only live in a very small region in Indonesia, on Komodo Island and Flores Island. The biggest threat to these impressive reptiles? Man encroaching on their territory and poaching their food sources.

Do the Zoo! Barani, an 8-year-old Komodo Dragon at Woodland Park Zoo — Barani, an 8-year-old Komodo Dragon at Woodland Park Zoo.

Keas

The Zoo has four Keas who often blend in with the olive green surroundings of their exhibit. Only through standing in front of their exhibit, listening to the birds call to each other, and watching closely have I been able to learn where their favorite spots are inside their exhibit. Patience pays off! They are tricky to photograph at the Zoo, however, without getting mesh between camera and kea. I’ve seen two during a visit to New Zealand’s South Island.

A kea, an alpine parrot, on the roof of a car in New Zealand. This cutie is feasting on berries that someone left behind.

Colobus Monkeys

These black-and-white, long-tailed monkeys native to Africa live near the gorilla exhibit. During a recent watch, guests commented most often about their long, white, bushy tails and skunk-like coloring. Animal keepers trained Blondie (pictured), Grabby, and Lewis, the newest member of the family.

Sometimes animals are named after keepers, or receive names in their native language. Blondie has white hair on her toes. Grabby likes to take food from Blondie.

Colobus monkey Blondie, distinguishable from male Lewis and female Grabby by the white tufts on her toes.

Volunteer with Horticulture

In July 2021, I accepted a temporary six-month Horticulture shift on Thursdays mornings, the day I used to help on the savanna. Until Labor Day, I helped water the ferns and new plants in the Dinosaur Discovery loop, a temporary exhibit in the south part of Zoo grounds near the Family Farm.

The author at Dinosaur Discovery, summer 2021. Part of my role was watering the plants in half of the exhibit before guests arrived.

Once the Zoo grounds opened at 9:30, we moved on to other tasks. We cut browse (another word for snack plants) at nearby Greenlake for all the herbivores. One shift included arranging flowers for Jungle Party, the Zoo’s annual fundraiser. Other shifts I helped rake, prune, transplant plants, and more. A side benefit of volunteering with Horticulture was asking questions about gardening from one of the best in the business.

My role as Horticulture helper is... be an extra pair of hands for manual labor including hauling, raking, pruning, digging, and more. — My role as Horticulture helper is… be an extra pair of hands for manual labor including hauling, raking, pruning, digging, and more.

Another benefit is accessing behind-the-scenes areas off-limits to the general public. These adorable goslings peeked through the fence at us, hoping for attention. Seeing all the areas the public does not gives me a much greater appreciation of all that the Zoo staff does to run such a highly esteemed facility.

Goslings behind-the-scenes; volunteering often gives us opportunities to witness off-exhibit animals before the general public.

Do the Zoo: Wildkeepers

During my eight years as a volunteer, one of my favorite shifts is as a Wildkeeper, what we in brown sweatshirts (volunteer colors) lovingly refer to as glorified Zookeepers without benefits. Sweeping, shoveling, raking, laying gravel — you name it, Wildkeepers do it.

Not only do we get a great workout, but after every several-hour shift of manual labor, we receive our own enrichment, a close encounter with a select “animal of the day.” Following several hours of raking in October, I fed apple pieces to the de-scented skunk, Harry, and I met Jibini, the Milky Eagle Owl, who hatched January 28, 2020.

Jibini, the Zoo's Milky Eagle-Owl, one of the Zoo's Ambassador Animals. — Jibini, the Zoo’s Milky Eagle-Owl, one of the Zoo’s Ambassador Animals.

Animal Visibility Watch

This shift may be my favorite during COVID times. For each two-hour shift, volunteers visit twenty animals who live scattered throughout the zoo. We spend up to a minute looking for each animal, roughly the time guests spend looking before they move on. We simply mark whether we saw the animal (s) before continuing.

Australasia

I took the following shots during my AV watches. Wallaroos and Wallabies are smaller cousins of kangaroos. They live in the Zoo’s Australasia exhibit. I’ve been fortunate enough to see their larger cousins, the kangaroos, in their natural habitat in Australia. They’re high on my list of animals to learn more about whenever they have another watch.

A young joey naps inside Mama's pouch. Only the tip of the tail is visible. — A young joey naps inside Mama’s pouch. Only the tip of the tail is visible.

A week later, it rests by Mama's side outside the pouch. — A week later, it rests by Mama’s side outside the pouch.

Assam Rhino Reserve

Another animal I’ve enjoyed learning about this year is the greater one-horned rhino. Many visitors ask if Glenn and Taj are brothers. They were born a day apart, in different zoos. Both boys turned five this month and will remain permanent residents at the Zoo. They have been in the former elephant exhibit since spring 2018.

Taj (left) and Glenn (right), summer of 2021. Taj has a distinct "jewel" mark in the center of his forehead and a grooved horn. — Taj (left) and Glenn (right), summer of 2021. Taj has a distinct “jewel” mark in the center of his forehead and a grooved horn.

Northern Trail

The Northern Trail opened this spring with plans to include lynx in the near future. Zeus, the male mountain goat, was translocated from Olympic National Park several years ago. He and Atlin fathered a new female kid on July 16. I have yet to get a good shot of her up close but this link will give you a great view!

King of the hill, papa Zeus, surveys his domain from the highest point in his exhibit.

Animal Unit Volunteer

I would be remiss if I didn’t include at least a short mention of the heart and soul of volunteering, in my mind: getting to directly help animals. In my role for more than two years as an Animal Unit Volunteer (AUV) within the savanna, I got to spend time near baby Hasani (meaning handsome, in Swahili) before he moved to Merkel, TX.

I arrived for my shift the morning he was born, and I cried when I saw how difficult it was for him to stand. He had a condition called hyperextended fetlocks. Fortunately, an equine vet was in town and helped outfit Hasani with custom shoes to support him until he grew strong enough on his own.

Hasani May 9, 2019, wearing splints inside the barn with Olivia, his mom.

Hasani's custom shoes a week later. — Hasani’s custom shoes a week later.

Unfortunately, I never got to say goodbye to Hasani. The Zoo remained closed to volunteers when keepers moved him to his new home. But I have fond memories of looking directly up at Dave, Hasani’s dad, as he chewed on browse in the stall next to the one I cleaned. All Zoo animals are amazing. Do you have a favorite?

I am within four shifts of reaching a thousand hours of volunteerism at the Zoo. Is volunteering in your future? What I’ve covered in this post is only a small fraction of the many possibilities. Once COVID restrictions change, even more opportunities will open up. Perhaps you, too, can do the Zoo for a brand new you.

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Lessons Learned During Surprise Snowfall at Mirror Lake

On November 6, Ajax and I met two friends, Tonia and Susie, at Exit 54 off I-90 to hike to Mirror Lake. The forecast promised precipitation all weekend. A lot of it. Lucky for us, we started early enough in the day that we experienced far more snow than rain. The change in seasons always provides unexpected lessons, and the surprise snowfall left each of us with valuable lessons learned.

The Trip that Almost Wasn’t

Up until 18 months ago, I would have called myself a fair-weather hiker. Anytime the chance for rain is greater than 50%, I reschedule. Why be miserable when you can go when it’s nice out? Plus, my dog is not a huge fan of walking in slop. Neither of us relished the thought of spending several wet hours outside in near-freezing temperatures. I almost postponed.

But then Tonia told me Susie would like to join us. For a year, the three of us had tried coordinating schedules to hike together, without success. I didn’t know when we’d find another opportunity. We had to try.

My Mirror Lake Team: Tonia, Susie, and Ajax.

Rain Turns to Snow

Early Saturday morning as we headed for Exit 54, I started second-guessing my decision as the rain turned into a downpour. Are we going to get all the way there, just to turn around and drive back? Two miles below the Hyak East exit, however, the rain turned into snow.

I love snow. I grew up in Wisconsin, after all. For the first time during our drive, enthusiasm, interest, and excitement returned. Maybe we’ll be in SNOW instead of RAIN. That would mean we wouldn’t get that wet. Maybe we could salvage this trip, after all.

Within five minutes of arriving at the agreed-upon parking lot, Susie showed up and told me Tonia would meet us in ten minutes. I’d only been up the Forest Road 9070 as far as Mt. Catherine. Susie, a skier, knows Exit 54 as well as I know Exit 47. Once Tonia arrived, my friends moved their boots and packs into my car and hopped into the back seat. Ajax navigated from the passenger side.

Ajax checks out the white stuff on FR-9070, the forest service road leading to Mt. Catherine, Mirror Lake, and the PCT.

Lessons Learned: Navigating Narrow Forest Roads

I navigated around deep pits in the gravel road, taking my time. Gravel gave way to slush, then finally to snow. I grew up in Milwaukee, but that doesn’t mean I know how to drive in the snow. But I didn’t give any thought to it…until my right tire started spinning. I eased up, tried again, shifted to manual. Were there chains in the back? Did the car have snow tires? Could we make it another third of a mile as is?

“Uh, guys, I keep slipping,” I said after seeing blinking lights on my dash for the third time.

“We can always park and walk from here,” Susie offered. Where would we leave the car? I hadn’t considered doing a 3-point turn on a narrow gravel road covered in snow. Thoughts of parallel parking failures as a teen shot through my head.

Knowing we’d have an easier time leaving with the car pointed downhill, we looked for a place wide enough to turn around. Backing up using a fogged rearview camera proved impossible. I kept heading toward the cliff edge, only to overcorrect. Before I knew it, one wheel slipped into the ditch.

Three-point turn on FR 9070 with ditch on one side and cliff on the other. — When you’re driving in unfamiliar conditions, the margin for error feels much smaller. With two of us giving directions, we got the car turned around safely, pulled off the road, and pointed downslope. It sure FELT deeper and more treacherous than it looked.

Tonia hopped in the driver’s seat while Susie and I pushed the car out of the ditch. Susie, most experienced with snow driving from years of skiing, offered to back up while Tonia and I provided directions. Before long, we got the car turned around. I found a wide-enough spot to pull aside and park. Finally, we were off!

Lessons Learned: Navigating High Water / Blow Downs

The first snow of the season is magical, full of hope and promise. Around us, the air felt clean, crisp, pure. Trees bowed to the sky’s mercy, laden in a blanket of white. Quite a contrast from the deforestation on Tiger that Ajax and I had witnessed five days earlier. The snow muffled all freeway sounds, and the forecast likely drove other shoulder-season hikers inside. Once again, we were the only ones on the trail. Bliss!

Our first stream crossing at the north fork of Cold Creek. Ajax is a trooper!

Mirror Lake is accessible from the Pacific Crest Trail. Susie led, followed by Tonia, while I snapped photos in the back. Anytime Ajax wanted to veer off in the wrong direction, we called him back. Due to all the recent precipitation, we navigated several rapid-water crossings. Ajax got his paws pretty wet but we continued without anyone slipping or falling in. Under freezing conditions, that could mean an immediate turnaround.

At one point we reached a huge log across the trail. The only way past it was over. Lucky for me, Ajax had on his “suitcase harness” so I could lift him onto the log and he could hop down. Other blow-downs weren’t as bad.

A blow-down across the trail had us using creative footholds to clamber over.

Lessons Learned: Heeding Driving Wind

After roughly 90 minutes, we descended slightly and found ourselves in 4-6 inches of snow. Strong wind gusts blew the snow sideways. When we regrouped, Ajax acted quite agitated, pacing back and forth in the biting wind. Susie voiced concern about the drive back down the gravel road. We had no way of knowing whether the conditions we faced on the trail were the same 1000′ lower where we parked. We had to assume we’d remain the only ones on the mountain, and without a cell signal. What if we struggled to get the car out?

Lessons learned: read canine body language! Ajax hunkers down under a growing tree well to get out of the bitter wind. — Ajax hunkers down under a growing tree well to get out of the bitter wind.

I was certain we’d be fine if we continued. However, when Ajax ducked into a growing tree well to protect himself from the sideways blowing snow, the scale tipped in favor of turning around. I’ve never seen such a pathetic look on my 6-year-old dog’s face before. He was genuinely miserable. His vote swayed mine, and we all agreed to turn around. But not before we got a few photos.

Our "summit" shot at the turn-around point. — Our “summit” shot at the turn-around point.

Once we climbed out of the basin, conditions changed. The wind died down, the snow let up, and at one point we actually had a momentary clearing across the valley. Had we waited a few minutes to see if anything would change, or if we’d started out from the car a few minutes earlier or later, would we have kept going?

Snow Changes Everything

The truth is, if I hadn’t had hiking partners lined up, I never would have left Seattle. Had I left Seattle alone, I would have chosen a familiar hike I’d done before. And had I gotten as far as FR 9070, I would have had difficulty turning around on the narrow road without partners. So the question is moot – alone, Ajax and I never would have chosen to explore the 5.3 miles and 950 feet gain that we did. So, what did we all learn?

We had a brief peek at the snow-draped valley below us.

Additional Lessons Learned

Snow changes everything, from gear to pack weight, from terrain considerations to travel time. It’s much easier to slip on wet, possibly icy rocks and logs in winter. A fall in a stream in summer is no big deal; in freezing conditions, it can become life-threatening. My dog is a great hiker, but with his thin coat and unprotected paws, I can’t expect him to be able to travel as far in the snow.

Modify Gear

It’s always better to be safe than sorry. Especially when everyone is excited for the first snow of the season. Shorter early-season snow outings are perfect for ironing out foul-weather gear. Tonia backtracked in Seattle to retrieve her waterproof shell. Susie had on the only rain pants. Two of us wore gaiters, but did any of us have the right waterproof boots for deep snow? Were our hats and gloves suitable for snow as well as rain? Did we each carry enough layers? How about a change of clothing in the car?

Ajax romps in the snow near the trailhead.

Add Travel Time

Snow travel is not the same as trail travel, so mileage has to be recalculated. All trail times get reset whenever you’re traveling over snow or ice; the deeper the snow, the slicker the conditions, the slower the going unless you’re wearing microspikes or snowshoes. Carrying more layers and equipment (and a hot beverage!) also means your pack will weigh more, which will slow you down.

Reduce Expectations

Weather in the mountains can change from moment to moment. While the avalanche risk in the early season is low, the other obstacles noted above make it important to lower your expectations. In the Cascades, if the forecast is for rain, but you can get up high enough, you can still be out without getting miserably wet if you’re in the snow. If the driving rain on the way home was any indication of what else was coming in, we made a wise decision. Better safe than sorry; we can always go back another day to enjoy the beauty of the winter wonderland.

Delicate icicles formed along the banks of Cold Creek.

Featured

Tiger Mountain’s Beauty Remains Despite Logging

On November 2, Ajax and I headed for Tiger Mountain, a half-hour drive from home. The upper trails had been closed for private logging since July. I was eager to learn whether I’d still have a good place to hike during the approaching winter months. This blog post is a photographic tribute to Tiger Mountain’s beauty, despite the devastation on all three summits due to logging.

A Trip Up Tiger Mountain Trail

The forecast called for cloudy, dry weather before noon. We left the parking lot at 8:15, unsure what we’d find or where we’d go. A perfect day for a coddiwomple.

A man without a pack headed down the trail just ahead of us. When he turned toward the Section trail, I decided we’d try our usual route but in reverse. We turned left onto Tiger Mountain Trail. Doing so would give me an opportunity to make sure the calf I’d strained on our Pratt Lake trip two weeks earlier would be okay. (It was!)

Evergreen versus Deciduous

Right away I noticed the difference in our surroundings compared to five months ago. Deciduous leaves blanketed the trail in yellows and browns while the ferns remained lush and healthy. Yellow carpeting provided the illusion of a sunnier day both from the brightness in the sky and the path under my feet. Unless you know the trail, it might be tricky finding the path through so many fallen leaves. But over the past eighteen months, Ajax and I have hiked many of Tiger’s routes. While I don’t quite know it like the back of my hand, it’s becoming familiar.

We took a brief break (clothing for me, water for Ajax) just before nine and didn’t see a single person, one of the reasons I enjoy going mid-week, early morning, in the off-season, on a less-used trail, and in transitional weather. It felt like we had the mountain all to ourselves.

Disturbance of the Peace

A few minutes later, the first buzzing of chain saws pierced the air. My heart sank. Loggers were already at work. We would probably hear them for the rest of our hike.

I knew from recent posts on Washington Trails Association that several routes to the summit had been closed. Tiger Mountain (Exit 20 off I-90 east of Seattle) is at low elevation and perfect for hiking year-round. I wanted to see for myself what side trails remained open for future winter outings.

I have many fond memories of snow blanketing the road between Tiger 2 and Tiger 1. Ajax and I have taken many jaunts through the forest, boughs laden with heavy snow.

Our Upward Coddiwomple Continues

Unfortunately, shots like the snowy one on this blog are only memories. As you can see from the map above, the top-most portion of Tiger Mountain has been logged. The good news is, tons of wonderful hiking remains, as long as you’re not summit-hungry. Tiger Mountain Trail and the Railroad Grade both provide ample low elevation hiking, only a portion of which is currently off-limits.

We followed the TMT until we reached the marker for “K3 / Unmaintained” and followed it steeply up and across several running streams. Section/Nook, TMT, Talus Rocks, and RRG trails all have running water on them; Cable and W. Tiger 3 do not.

We leapfrogged upward until we reached the sign indicating the summit of West Tiger 2, a half-mile away, cordoned off with obnoxious orange netting. After turning east we continued beneath Tiger 1’s summit until the sounds of logging drowned out the sounds of wildlife and running water.

At our designated turn-around time, we headed back the way we’d come, navigating around a large downed tree across upper K3. When we reached the Cable Line Trail, I decided I really wanted to see what was left of the summit. We headed straight up.

A Mountain Being Loved to Death

The erosion on the Cable Line trail stunned me. Cables hang in places, looking almost like hand lines. Usually, a foot (or more) of soil covers them. So many hikers have traveled this trail, it looks as bad as the old route on Mailbox. Maybe worse.

At the sign indicating .6 miles to the summit, we turned off the deeply rutted track and continued on the much nicer main trail to the summit of West Tiger 3. Or, I should say, what remains.

Ugly Summits

Large orange barriers and warning signs indicate that the area is being actively logged and to keep out, courtesy of Weyerhaeuser. The summit of West Tiger 3 has been completely destroyed.

Logging has moved east; the summits of Tiger 1 and 2 are still being decimated. Ugly, gaping wounds stretch in every direction. My heart goes out to the gray jays, chipmunks, woodpeckers, songbirds, and other critters who once called the summits home.

And to all those hikers in the Puget Sound region who no longer have access to a great training route. Yeah, sure, now you can see Mt. Rainier from all three summits, but with no foreground.

To a hiker gawking at the destruction, I commented, “This may be worse than a volcanic eruption.” At least volcanic material becomes fertile ground, given enough time.

Tiger Mountain’s Beauty on Our Return to the Car

On our hour-long hike down the Section Trail, we only encountered one other gentleman on his way to the summit. The sound of logging dimmed and disappeared behind me, almost like a bad dream. Around us we could once again hear birds calling, squirrels chittering, and water running. My sadness turned to peace as I relished the beauty that remains intact on the rest of Tiger Mountain. The mushrooms and fungus keep doing their job decaying old logs.

Moss continues to drape branches and birds continue to create peepholes. I still recognize favorite trees from earlier photographs. No vibrant reds or oranges to speak of, but the textures and nuances of the greens, yellows, and browns soothed me.

And when we reached the large stump where I take selfies, Tuesday was no exception. What goes through our pets’ heads when they see something change so dramatically? Did the unfamiliar noises disturb him? Or was he merely hungry? What caused the startled expression on his face?

Tiger Mountain’s Beauty Endures: Take-aways

As I reflect on our November second hike, I ponder the take-away messages Mother Nature left with me:

Look for the good, the beautiful, the positive in any change, whether we perceive it as good or bad. It’s there. Logging is ugly. Yet Mother Nature heals, and with time there will again be beautiful forest growth on Tiger 1, 2 and 3. Meanwhile, the bulk of Tiger Mountain remains unaffected. It’s truly a beautiful place.
Express gratitude for what is. I am so grateful for my photo log of hikes when Tiger’s summits were pristine. I can look back on our many, many trips and remember, fondly, all the beauty we discovered as a family, with friends, or solo with my pup.
Understand the difference between change we can control (like what job to take, how much to eat, or where to move) and change we can’t (such as natural disasters, COVID or social justice policies, and local logging).
Choose to do something to manage the impact of those changes we can’t control. We have a voice; use it.
Find truth and comfort in “Serenity, courage, and wisdom.” And trust that Mother Nature will prevail.

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Trash Pick-up Experiment Yields Surprising Results

When I first conceived of OcTraPiMo (October: Trash Pick-up Month, 9/28-10/28/21), I never would have predicted the outcome. My dog and I completed 35 walks of at least 30 minutes each, dedicated exclusively to picking up trash on our routes, with these exceptions. We varied our routes to cover as much ground as possible. We visited a third of our routes more than once.

Trash Pick-up Results

We invested a total of 22.5 hours in this project, recovering 5080 pieces of garbage. We averaged 145 pieces per walk (225 pieces per hour). The highest trash totals were 425 and 433 (both on walks lasting 79 minutes) and we collected the lowest number (the winner!) on October 22, the only walk all month where we gathered less trash than minutes walked (15 pieces in 19 minutes.)

Sadly, not once did we walk in our North Seattle neighborhood without seeing any garbage. Only during our 12.1-mile hike to Pratt Lake did we not find any trash.

So, what, exactly, did we find?

Most Interesting Finds

Over the course of a month, I found enough clothing to make an entire outfit, albeit of differing sizes. I left the pair of jeans with a belt in hopes that whoever left them might return for them. Someone had tossed a gray hooded sweatshirt deep into a hedge. I’d seen suspended sneakers before, but never a single shoe under shrubs until now. Socks and hats? Fairly commonplace. But a bra? Could these items have fallen out of someone’s backpack?

Most Disturbing Finds

These fell into three categories. The countless tiny plastic bits from juice box straws won as most offensive from an environmental standpoint. On repeated visits to the Olympic Hills Elementary School ground near our house, we collected dozens to hundreds of tiny pieces discarded from children who had eaten lunch outside.

Second: junk mail strewn everywhere, soaked from the rain. This disturbed me because of the eyesores the large pieces of trash created. Even worse, however: they provided proof that local thieves had been hunting through mailboxes for something of greater value.

Discarded masks, never seen before two years ago, were a very close second to a plethora of beverage containers: styrofoam, paper, and plastic Starbucks and soda cups; beer and soda cans and bottles; plastic juice boxes; and water bottles, sometimes unopened, other times punctured, occasionally reused for purposes too disgusting to repeat, and many times crushed from cars repeatedly running over them at busy intersections.

Most Offensive Finds

By far the most offensive findings were used condoms, syringes, and razors, all of which we didn’t collect. I pledged not to pick up anything that might harm me (including broken glass). But the most curious? Little blue and silver metal cylinders I’d never seen before. After finding a box of 20 under a hedge one day, I had to look up online what they were.

I guessed whoever bought them must have had some motive other than adding them to whipped cream dispensers. I was right. Oh, my stars. Naive me, I never realized people use nitrous oxide canisters — laughing gas — as a mood-altering substance. You learn something new every day.

Why I Cut the Experiment Short

I committed to my experiment for an entire month. On October 27, I stopped collecting trash. I feared for my safety not once, but twice, and realized my mental health was more important than completing the experiment.

Safety Risk 1

As we made our way from the library to the post office collecting trash, I spotted a hedge with many pieces of trash. Big pieces. I wasn’t sure I could fit it all in my bag, but the area was a complete eyesore. The bottles I pulled out were all empty. A box of cereal felt like it still had food inside. Another heavy bag did not feel like trash. Was that a bag of…groceries?

Aware that homeless people frequented the area, I suddenly thought: Is this trash or a cache? Could I be removing containers (assuming they were garbage) that were items someone had stashed for later? A fearful idea popped into my head: could someone think I’m a thief? Might I become the next victim of a local shooting accident, just for doing something innocent and helpful like collecting trash?

“That’s it. We’re done,” I told Ajax. We headed for the nearest public trash can outside a grocery store.

Safety Risk 2

But addictions are hard to break. A few blocks later, I found myself bending over to pick up more offensive litter. A man from across the busy street, hands thrust in the pockets of his beige jacket, called out, “That’s really nice of you. I do that sometimes in my own neighborhood.” My fourth thank-you in thirty-five walks.

Two blocks from our house, I stepped into a culvert for yet another beer can. A car slowed next to me. A 30-something white man in a wool cap lowered his window. “Ma’am, just wanted to tell you for your own safety. You’re really hard to spot by drivers rounding that corner.”

That clinched it. I’d put my dog and my own safety at risk while pursuing a clean neighborhood. No more. I can pick up the obvious trash at my feet. But unless I have on a bright orange neon vest, it’s unsafe to keep doing what I’ve been doing as I’ve been doing it.

Mental Health First

Returning home with a bag full of 300-400 pieces of community garbage is…depressing. I can’t help but judge fellow humans as a whole for becoming slobs.

My husband has even noticed a difference in my mood. When he joined me on one of our “trash walks” late in the month, he asked, “Do you plan to continue beyond October?” I said I wasn’t sure. “Maybe you’ve gotten everything from it that you can.” Hm.

What exactly had been the goal? Clean up the world? Spark a massive OcTraPiMo movement across the city? Make my neighborhood beautiful again? Set an example for my daughter? See what would happen? When cravings for unhealthy foods returned, I knew I had to complete the experiment that had run its course and threatened to harm me, psychologically and physically.

Why Trash Pick-up Month Was Worthwhile

I would encourage everyone to try a version of the experiment for themselves. For at least one neighborhood walk, see what happens. In my late-night mulling after developing the first draft of this post, I came to the following conclusions:

Reduce, reuse, recycle is a learned first-world mantra
“Pack out what you pack in” is a phrase engrained in me during twenty-five years with the Seattle Mountaineers
Respect for land, property, and wild life, then, must also be learned. However, it is not necessarily a value everyone shares. If you lack a roof over your head, food to eat, or a job, you may struggle to meet basic needs
Is this issue a matter of privilege? As a female Caucasian business owner with a roof over my head, sufficient food and resources, and time to volunteer, maybe I take too much for granted. I value clean, green spaces and take great pride in ownership. I have made the faulty assumption that others should share my passion for conservation and the outdoors. But many are not nearly as fortunate as I am.
Could I try imagining the story behind how each piece of trash ended up where it is?
You find what you seek. Sort of like the Punch Buggy or Slug Bug game.

November Focus and Photos

“Find what you seek” turned out to be especially important. The more I looked for trash, the more I found. My 5080 total amounts to a lot of trash. But so what? A friend pointed out, “Might those less fortunate than you use trash to mark their territory or define their boundaries?” That, and many other thoughts on this month-long journey, never even occurred to me. I am so lucky to be able to come up with and try experiments like this.

During the past three years, I’ve focused on capturing the world’s beauty and uniqueness in my photographs. In November, my goal is to look at things in a new way. If I can train myself to notice the bad, the ugly, the grotesque in a single month, what can I discover when I retrain myself to see the good, the beautiful, the wonderful?

The images I’ve added to this story are some of my most inspired and colorful during October in 2020 and 2021. My hope is that they inspire you to try something new, expand outside of your comfort zone, and learn something new in the coming weeks. Maybe I’ll see you out walking in a few days, picking up Halloween candy wrappers. For the love of all things beautiful, and for the world that we want to live in.

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Backyard Wildlife Habitat: Ten Year Origin and Evolution

If you’ve followed my blog since I started posting in July 2021, you probably know how much our backyard wildlife habitat means to me. And how I am not someone with a “green thumb.” You may recall that starting this blog evolved from the idea of doing “50 home projects in 50 days.”

One of those projects was to muck out our pond, something we hadn’t done since installing it a decade ago. Last weekend, we finally got around to it. Since then, I’ve been pondering how enhancing our suburban retreat ties into the concept of getting unstuck.

Planting a Hedgerow

In 2011, we wanted to attract wild birds to our backyard feeders so we could photograph them up close. A water feature and native plants seemed like the best lure. I’ve always enjoyed the sound of running water, so we planned to include a mini-waterfall. After weeks of landscape design and research about plants native to the Pacific Northwest, we got to work.

During a long weekend in March, my husband and I prepared the soil, creating a zen-like flow to the hedgerow outlined with interlocking red brick. We spaced the larger shrubs several feet apart: red-flowering currant, Indian plum, Ninebark. Snowberry, Ocean Spray, Mock orange. Serviceberry and blueberry. We chose as groundcovers wild strawberry and crinkle-leaf creeper plants.

In two days, we turned the south part of our backyard into the infant hedgerow pictured below, leaving space to install a pond when it got warmer. We still had more research to do to find out how to make one work.

Installing a 3-tiered Pond

Phase two took place over Memorial Day weekend. First, we removed additional grass and measured how deep and wide the pond should be. Once we dug out the dirt and mounded it for the cascading waterfall, we lined the hole with carpeting to protect it from added rocks, root punctures, and critters with sharp claws.

After placing the pond liner, we filled the depression with water and added gravel. The decorative pebbles gave it a natural look and provided a variety of depths for birds of different sizes to stand on for bathing. Next, we hooked up the fountain so we’d have running water, both for our enjoyment and to attract birds flying over.

Our daughter helped fill in gaps between pavers with gravel. We built a mound for our three-tiered recycling waterfall and removed the excess liner material. After adding several water lily plants and larger rocks to mask the pond liner, we were ready to turn it on.

All we had to do was sit back and let Mother Nature do her growing magic.

Maintaining a Wildlife Habitat

Just as every home improvement project takes more time–and money–than budgeted, every goal has plenty of obstacles and pitfalls. Every story has a hero who struggles. And every goal, once reached, requires maintenance.

Whenever you take on a yard project yourself, especially if you’re not a landscape designer, it’s easy to overlook long-term maintenance costs. We love our water feature, but we’ve definitely had issues with it. Hoses clog. Unwanted algae forms on the surface. Plants die. Weeds take over. Leaves decay in the basin. As homeowners, these are all things we have to manage for years to come.

The biggest nuisance? Once every six months or so, raccoons (at least, we think) knock the fountain over, causing it to shoot water out of the basin and drain before we notice and turn off the pump. I promised that the next time it happened, I would clean out the pond and build a better foundation for the fountain before we refilled it.

That opportunity came last weekend. We all contributed to the clean-out effort, just in time for Mother Nature to blow off most of the surrounding leaves.

Wildlife Habitat Take-Away

I realize that cleaning out a pond is a tiny project and a problem of low importance in the grand scheme of things. After all, we’re living during a pandemic. Violence is increasing everywhere, our climate is changing dramatically, social injustice pervades daily experience, and political arguments divide our nation. All of these are mega-scale problems. Yet if I think about such issues, I freeze, powerless to change anything. We can’t live with powerlessness.

We must look at the macro level. What can a single person do? I can take good care of the things that matter most to me. Our backyard habitat has become a stopping point for migrating birds. It is a refuge for songbirds, woodpeckers, raptors, and hummingbirds. It attracts moles, voles, raccoons, possums, squirrels, and more. Keeping it healthy and picking up trash around the neighborhood are two things I can do locally, on a daily basis.

Take back the wild a weekend, a year, a decade at a time. By reflecting on the evolution of our habitat, I’ve seen in pictures what’s possible. If only a handful of us in every neighborhood made the same commitment to the environment, what a difference we could make.

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Narrowly Escaping Injury in the Alpine Lakes Area

Three weeks had passed since my last hike to Mason Lake and Bandera. I desperately needed some solitude in nature. At the beginning of the day, I had no idea that in several hours, I would be narrowly escaping injury.

My dog, Ajax, and I usually start hiking at dawn. Tuesday, we tried something different. We headed for the mountains after dropping my daughter off at school. The familiar yearning to be “first up the trail” grew until we arrived at the Pratt Lake parking lot. At least four other groups had beaten us to the trailhead. I locked the car at 8:30, with Ajax on a leash and a restless feeling in my gut.

Race up the Mountain

We soon caught up to the largest group of six at the first fork. They turned right toward Granite Mountain. Ten minutes later, we passed a trio of backpackers taking a clothing break. All that remained were two pairs. Could they have been heading toward Granite, too? Soon after that, I felt the whisper of spider webs across my face.

I smiled and my mood improved. Even leaving this late, we were first on this section of the trail. Not only could I let my dog off-leash, but we could enjoy the peace surrounding us. No more need to race. The only deadline facing us was returning to the car by 3:15, or else dealing with rush hour traffic through downtown Seattle.

Fall Discoveries

Around us, vanilla leaf plants, ferns, and maples shone vibrant yellow. Mushrooms of all sizes, shapes, and colors peeked out from fallen leaves. Rushing streams crossed our path. Rivulets that flow from alpine springs even in times of drought now had more water volume due to October’s rainfall. I spotted small salad-plate patches of snow on the highest ridge, signs of approaching winter. But the day itself was balmy, in the low 60’s, with a slight breeze. We’d enjoy one last hurrah before storms hit the Puget Sound region.

As we hiked, I pondered blog post ideas. Other writers have written about finding creative inspiration while walking. I do, too. We reached the second fork at mile two and headed right toward Pratt Lake. At the Olallie Lake overlook, we snapped a photo of Mt. Rainier towering over the surrounding hills in the mid-autumn sky. Four minutes later, we came to the third fork. Left leads to Rainbow and Island Lakes, which I’d visited earlier this year, twice. Right leads to Pratt Lake Basin. We turned right.

Down we wound past several switchbacks. As we crossed the boulder field, I took a selfie in front of beautiful bright yellow, orange, and red maple leaves. Part of my excitement about “getting my nature fix” was enjoying fall foliage before storms blow down all the leaves. This hike did not disappoint.

A Surprising Spill Hours from the Car

Once we passed the boulder field, we entered the woods where I’d gotten stung by a yellowjacket three months earlier. I stepped down onto a slanted boulder stuck in the middle of the trail, and before I knew what was happening, I slipped.

As I landed on both feet, I felt more than heard a pop on the lateral side of my right knee, just below the knee joint. I’d fallen correctly – not on my hips, tailbone, face, wrists, or elbows. But popping is a bad sign.

Uh oh.

I gently loaded it to test it – no break, no dislocation, no fracture. No shooting pain, no buckling, no sprain. Sometimes Ajax can sense my mood shifts. He didn’t react at all. You’re okay, I told myself.

Decision Time

A tiny voice of reason whispered, “Turn around.” I was 2 hours and 20 minutes from the car, 90 minutes of which would be downhill. Once I climbed out of the basin, that is. I flexed and extended my foot, drew circles, took a few more steps – the ankle felt fine. I did a few stretches, then bent and straightened my leg. Tight.

I have a high tolerance for pain. I know a lot about the human body. I’d endured natural childbirth without pain medication. I’d also climbed Kilimanjaro five weeks after fracturing my foot. I had no swelling, nothing I could see or feel externally, just tenderness and tightness where a tendon popped.

Am I Really Injured?

This was nothing compared to incidences I’d experienced in the past. Yet except for Ajax, I was completely alone. That niggling voice of reason persisted. Could I trust my right leg to get me back out if I kept going? Was I walking into a troubling rescue situation if I continued? Was anyone else camping in the basin if I suddenly couldn’t walk? What if I fell again?

Lured by the Destination

I got my trekking pole out of my pack. I don’t always use it, but I always have one with me. The lure of the destination and the last bit of beautiful weather overpowered my logical brain. We kept going, but instead of thinking about future blog posts, I cued into bodily sensations. I can always turn around, I thought.

My pole stayed out over the next three and a half hours. I found myself leading with my left leg on unknown or steep steps. Were they slick or solid? Fortunately, we’d already descended most of the way into the basin. Walking on level ground boosted my confidence. I only had a slight limp. I could do this.

Destination Reached

For the next half hour, we traversed Pratt Lake, shooting photos of the brilliant fall foliage. At the fourth fork, we turned right toward Melakwa Lake.

Only .6 miles farther, we reached our final destination, windy Lower Tuscohatchie Lake. I took a short ten-minute break to feed Ajax, mix a protein shake, and shoot some photos. I couldn’t risk spending any more time. Not knowing whether my leg injury would become more painful, I wanted as much leeway as possible for our return to the car. We were forty minutes ahead of our turn-around time when we started back, buffeted by strong wind.

Returning to the Car

At Pratt Lake, we spotted two tents near the trail. Somehow, we’d missed them on the way to Lake Tuscohatchie. Did they belong to the three hikers we passed earlier that morning? We continued on toward the Pratt Lake traverse and took another quick snack break. Each time we stopped, I felt my calf stiffen. We had to keep it warm by moving. I’d rest it in the car.

Fortunately, I have very strong legs. They behaved as well as one might expect. We hiked out of the basin without seeing anyone else. Two miles from the trailhead, two Asian women approached with a huge fluffy dog. They didn’t respond to my greeting. Within a mile of the car, we spotted two other solo hikers, both women.

I felt the top of my calf with every step, but the low-grade ache told me I’d heal in a few days. On the way out, I briefly wondered what I would have done if I’d gotten seriously injured. What if I’d tried taking a step and couldn’t bear weight? I could have been in big trouble. And seeing so few people on the trail — nobody equipped to help anyone beyond themselves — I had to trust my ability and be self-reliant. There was no other option.

Expressing Gratitude

During the last hour, I said aloud, “Thank you X,” for all the things I was grateful for: my strong legs for getting me out safely. My boots for protecting my feet. Ajax, for his wonderful companionship. The light breeze for keeping me comfortable. The melody of the streams, and the colorful leaves. Not a single piece of trash anywhere. And the first sight of my car at 3:14.

We’d reached Lower Tuscohatchie Lake, gotten some great fall foliage shots, and made it out safely, all while avoiding panic. After several days of resting and stretching, I’m ready to hike again. Injury averted. Mental wellness re-established. Confidence restored. Mission accomplished.

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Need Motivation? Get Support from Accountability Partners

A great way to stay on track with your most important goals is to engage the help of accountability partners. Such people can provide much-needed support, encouragement, and motivation at any stage.

A workout partner might meet you at the gym to exercise with you. A hiking partner can meet you at a trailhead for an adventure. A critique partner is someone who reads your manuscript drafts and provides feedback on what’s working and what is not. Accountability partners keep you on track toward your stated goal which could be in any of the above areas. They discuss how you’re doing, where you’re struggling, and what you want to accomplish. If you feel your enthusiasm waning, find a supportive buddy.

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Who Might Become Accountability Partners?

First and foremost, look for someone you trust. The last thing you need is to reveal your dreams to someone who laughs about them or tries to discourage you. You might choose a friend, family member, or significant other as your partner. Or you may feel more comfortable buddying with someone from the same gym or club. Someone, perhaps, who has reached a goal similar to yours who provides advice.

Online resources such as Meetup, Reddit, or Facebook groups, forums, or focus groups can also reveal suitable people. Participating in trips with outdoor organizations like the Mountaineers, Sierra Club, or the Mazamas can be a fabulous way to meet potential partners.

If you are a writer, you could ask someone in your writing community, critique group, or local conference to partner with you. Taking classes on something that interests you is a great way to meet other like-minded people who could be supportive buddies. For additional details about finding an appropriate accountability partner check out Five Steps to Succeed with an Accountability Partner.

The Difference Between a Teacher/Coach and Accountability Partner

Trainers, teachers, and coaches can certainly provide motivation and accountability, but they are usually paid experts in their field. Accountability partners are free! The hiking buddy who meets you at the trailhead and supplies interesting conversation could make a great partner.

I joke that my hiking accountability partner is my dog Ajax. Whenever he sees me loading my backpack the night before a hike, he knows we’re going on a fun adventure the next morning. One look in those adoring, eager eyes — rain or shine — and I know I cannot disappoint him. When I ask him for advice his answer is always, “Hike more.”

What An Accountability Partner Does

Accountability partners will listen to you, provide feedback, and help you stay on track. They provide external motivation to complement your internal motivation. I use an accountability partner within the realm of writing. We correspond by email twice a week. In each exchange, we share successes from the previous 3-4 days and outline our goals for the coming days.

By writing down such goals and committing to another person, I strengthen my resolve to follow through. I don’t want to let her down or confess that I didn’t do what I promised I would. And in return, I offer her the same support and encouragement.

Provide Friendly Competition

You can do the same for health and fitness. Tell your partner what workouts or hikes you plan to do, what time you’ll go to sleep each night, or how many servings of protein you’ll have each day. Wherever you want to make progress! Accountability partners might also provide motivation through friendly competition. I like my husband’s definition of competition: “agreeing to perform better.” That is exactly what you’re looking for. Your goal is to support your buddies to meet their movement goals, not necessarily “win” or “beat” anyone.

Your gym might offer some type of contest such as climbing x flights of stairs in a month, walking or jogging y miles, lifting z pounds, or completing specific hikes by a given date. In these cases, the goals include finding ways to inspire movement while building stronger social communities.

Help Support Change

Accountability partners can help in other segments of your life, too. Maybe you want a new job. Perhaps you need to expand your social network. Or you’re ready to change your diet, but doing so is difficult on your own. Finding someone who will listen to you, become your sounding board, and brainstorm ways to get past obstacles can help.

When Should You Enlist Help from an Accountability Partner?

Whenever you feel like you are struggling or want added positive pressure, find help. Starting out, you might feel like you need to check in with your partner every few days. As you build your habit, shift to weekly or monthly check-ins. If the first person isn’t a good fit, keep searching until you find someone who is. Be sure to exchange equally so the relationship does not become one-sided.

Why Partner Up?

We are stronger in collaborative relationships than we are working alone. It is hard to break promises we make to others. Especially those we trust and respect. Commit to your partner, schedule your accountability practice in your calendar, and get to work making changes. If I can do it, you can too. Remember, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

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How To Avoid Sabotage By Being True To Yourself

Tongariro Alpine Crossing: NZ’s Best Single-Day Hike

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One of the most stunning hikes I’ve ever been on is the Tongariro Alpine Crossing on New Zealand’s North Island. Hiking the 12.4-mile route was at the top of my experience wishlist when my husband, daughter, and I visited in 2014-2015. The forecast on our northward drive to Auckland was for partly cloudy skies and gusts up to 15 mph. Our return flight to the States was in three days. We would not have another chance. And I almost gave it up by not being true to myself.

Obstacles or Excuses?

To prepare, we’d done some hikes with my daughter in the States. Nothing as long as I would have recommended to clients preparing for such a hike. We’d toured as much of New Zealand as we could, and our fuses were growing short. Although we’d included some moderate hikes, a horseback ride, a kayak tour, and sightseeing during our trip, we’d also spent many hours each day driving.

When our daughter told us that her knees hurt several days before our trek, I voiced my concerns to my husband. We promised we’d take frequent breaks. If she needed a longer rest, she could build a fairy house along the trail. I offered to carry all of her clothing, water, and gear. We prepared word games to keep her mind engaged. And we stocked up on yummy snacks to keep her fueled.

I wanted to back down at the last minute. Too many things could go wrong. But my husband said we should try it. I later learned that he’d even persuaded her to do it without complaints, as a holiday gift to me.

Decision to Try

On day 22, we drove north from Nelson to Picton (South Island) and caught a four-hour Interislander Ferry to the North Island. We then drove four more hours, stopping only for gas, stretching, and food. When we finally spotted snow-capped Ruapehu near dusk, I felt myself getting excited. Could my dream actually come true?

When we arrived at the A Plus Samurai Lodge in Turangi, it was after sunset. We still had to iron out the logistics of dinner, as well as the transport to and from the mountain. The one-way trip required a drop-off at one end and pick-up at the other, both of which were included in our two-night stay. The rest was out of our control.

Arrival at the Trailhead

That night, I had numerous nightmares: forgetting the first aid kit, missing our ride, getting dehydrated, running out of daylight, and nursing my daughter’s knees halfway through the day. But when we finally awoke at 5:45, excitement and anxiety dueled within me.

We weren’t exactly sure how the commute would work, but as the van climbed toward Mongatepopo Hut, above the clouds obscuring the mountain, we arrived without incident. It looked like decent weather after all. All we had to do was hike the 12.4 miles to our ride on the other side.

Trek Teachings: Tenacity and Trust

Details about the trek would make this post too long. Many others do a nice job. We succeeded without getting dehydrated, lost, battered, or injured. But the whole reason for this blog is to share one message: be tenacious about going after what you want.

Never “Settle” for Less Than What you Want

I tried to talk myself out of the trek, blaming my daughter’s knees and youth, our fatigue after long hours in the car, inconvenient store hours, fear of what could go wrong. And in one passage of my journal, I struck gold. I’d written about the shame I felt eating an ice cream bar and how canceling the trek should be my punishment. Yeah, I know. One frigging ice cream bar.

Seven years ago, I felt like I didn’t deserve to get what I wanted. Today, typing these words hurts. When I told my husband what I was writing, he astutely summed up my struggle: I have difficulty being true to myself, standing up for what I really want. Like starting a blog.

No Passion In Playing Small

Nelson Mandela said, “There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.” How fortunate I am to have a husband who lives according to strong principles like finishing what you start and making those things that you really want, happen.

We succeeded on that trek because he knew how important it was to me. We planned it; he helped carry out the plan. We all need moral support in order to change, whether that’s from a significant other, family member, colleague, coach, friend, or accountability partner. He listens to me and helps silence the niggling voice of fear, doubt, and shame. He keeps me on track when I threaten to veer off of it.

Who are your biggest supporters? Who will help you when you want to hole up with Netflix instead of doing something that matters to you?

Paying It Forward

Now that I write from what I hope is greater strength and self-acceptance, I realize maybe I had to live through times of self-berating and struggle to reach a position where I can help coach others find the courage to change. Overcoming my addiction to sugar helped me minimize the self-doubt and shame and take pride in what I can do.

Crystal Raypole suggests in her helpful article on overcoming self-sabotage: “Self-sabotage can happen when you’re looking for a way out. Such behaviors help suggest something about your situation that isn’t working for you.” In our case, we had a lot of valid concerns, any one of which could have prevented us from starting. I was willing to place my daughter’s comfort above my own desires.

We trusted that things would work out. We had to at least try. And I am so glad we did. Not only was the trek a major highlight of two trips to New Zealand, but mulling over the significance of that trek has drilled home the importance of staying true to what you really want. My hope is that the next time I feel the need to punish myself by giving up something I really want, I will stop and remember the Tongariro Alpine Crossing and the wonderful memories of a successful trip.

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OcTraPiMo: Clean Up Seattle, One Month at a Time

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Last week, my husband and I had a conversation that could have easily led me down a rabbit hole into hopelessness. Seeing as how I’m embracing change this year, I refused to let it. Instead, it gave me an empowering idea. If November is known to novelists as NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month), what if October became known as OcTraPiMo (October Trash Pick-up Month)?

Frost-tipped succulents. One reason I want to protect my neighborhood from trash is so that I can continue to find such beauty. OcTraPiMo for beauty. — Frost-tipped succulents. One reason I want to protect my neighborhood from trash is so that I can continue to find such beauty.

The Birth of an Idea

My husband told me about one of his friends who recently drove from Seattle to Portland to watch his kids participate in invitational cross-country meets. As he crossed into Oregon, he said the number of homeless people, trash heaps, and tent cities increased dramatically all the way into the city. When he registered at his hotel, the clerk insisted that he bring all valuables from his car inside. “The parking lot is no longer safe,” he was told, despite lights brighter than daylight.

Similarly, when I drive through downtown Seattle, graffiti and tags cover public buildings, overpasses, side streets, thruways. Trash litters the highway below tent cities near freeway banks. People have caused severe burn scars where they’d had city fires.

As recently as ten years ago, we had none of this, at least nowhere near as visible or ubiquitous as now. What’s happened to our beautiful region? Where’s the pride, the care?

When Anger Boils, Listen

As I listened to my husband relate his friend’s story, I grew more disgusted and increasingly incensed. Historically whenever I feel my personal power slipping away in a discussion, I withdraw, thinking surely the other person must be right.

But not this time. I’ve had enough of our beautiful area being trashed. On a tiny scale, I can relate to what indigenous peoples must have felt when the first wave of settlers swarmed into the area.

But what can one person do? When I walk my dog beyond my clean, well-cared-for neighborhood streets and see litter in every direction, I turn a blind eye. “It’s not my property,” I think. “It’s not my responsibility.” And in today’s litigious society, even, “I might get sued for trespassing.”

Is that how we all feel? Ignore it, because what can a single person do? It’s someone else’s problem?

Ingrained Integrity

In the mountains whenever I come across anything that doesn’t naturally belong, even orange peels or apple cores that will eventually decompose, I pick them up and pack them out. I carry my dog’s double-bagged poops with me, and I add to my load dog bags others drop along the path. I’ll stink so our beautiful trails don’t.

At Woodland Park Zoo, I watch for trash that visitors throw in the bushes. While it may be one of my responsibilities volunteering with the Horticulture team, I want to help the Zoo remain a beautiful green oasis in an overly crowded city. All guests have the right to enjoy it in its pristine state. I do these things already, naturally. Why not do the same thing in the yards and streets beyond mine?

Transference of Habits

I could easily carry a pair of rubber gloves in my pocket. And it’s easy to attach a large plastic bag inside a sturdier handled canvas carrier so I can remove the most eye-offending trash. Other families have done this near the library and schools with their kids. Those children are our future. Like sponges, they see and hear everything. They need to see adults making a positive difference so that they know they can, too.

Individual acts of kindness can cause a ripple effect.

While I may not be able to single-handedly clean up the country, the state, even my city, I CAN do my small part. And if whole bunches of individuals did the same thing, imagine the world of difference we could make. For each bag of trash collected and properly disposed of, the earth would be one bag cleaner. Each scrap of plastic we remove means that birds and fish will ingest less garbage. We can become stewards of the entire planet, not just special places like trails, parks, and zoos.

The Experiment

I decided to test out my OcTraPiMo idea two days before October, to get a jump-start developing my new habit. My “trash dog” (Ajax loves to get into the garbage cans when nobody is home) would become an actual trash dog. Our goal was to turn one of our three daily walks into a thirty-minute trash collection outing.

Anything larger than a quarter ended up in my bag. For obvious reasons, I excluded used needles, razors, human excrement, and broken glass. A week into my experiment, I added a category: other people’s bagged trash. With the number of squatters and homeless people growing on the perimeter of my North Seattle neighborhood, I don’t want to be inadvertently accused of stealing. I kid you not, I’ve seen and heard it all.

Test Run

In my first one-mile walk along a twenty-minute route I refer to as my “default”, I collected 90 pieces of trash. My walk around the neighborhood elementary school had always seemed so clean before. My haul included three AA batteries, a scrap of a child’s toy tire discarded in the gutter, three masks, a plastic bottle, and an empty beer can. But the biggest offender was numerous scraps of plastic, including straw wrappers from juice boxes and broken forks tossed by school kids who eat outside due to the pandemic. I’m amazed by what you get used to and no longer SEE.

The second day I stayed in a residential part of the neighborhood and my trash count for the same duration was half. Masks and discarded beer, soda, or water bottles were the biggest offenders.

One Month, One Walk, One Bag at a Time

On day 3, my first official OcTraPiMo day, I headed a block west of the local elementary school in what I call “the valley.” My trash count doubled for a thirty-minute collection. Realizing I didn’t get it all, Ajax and I went back on day four, to collect 163 more pieces in 33 minutes. Something unusual happened on day five: my daughter asked to join us. We collected 169 pieces of trash on residential streets in 30 minutes.

And on day six, I smashed my record (is this a good or bad thing?) On a walk to school with my daughter, I collected 153 pieces during 33 minutes. Later in the afternoon, Ajax and I walked to the closest neighborhood library. My haul of 225 was so heavy — lots of wet cardboard, bottles, cans, and a heavy piece of a car I didn’t even know what to call it — that I dumped it in the library trash can and continued home to collect another 140.

Surprising Results

My OcTraPiMo month is in its infancy. I intend to continue for the entire month, possibly even beyond. But I can already celebrate and share several interesting takeaways:

More of What We Focus On

First, collecting trash has made me focus on… trash. And how much there is that we don’t even see. In just six days, I have completely switched my attention away from finding Little Free Libraries (my former walking obsession) and toward removing eyesores that harm the environment. Remember the Punch Buggy game, spotting VW cars and giving your neighbor a punch in the arm? Now I see trash everywhere. In less than a week, I feel guilty if I pass by a piece of garbage I could do something about.

Could we cultivate this same focus on good deeds or tiny positive steps we take toward our goals? If I can train myself to zoom in on trash, can I also train myself to focus on beauty? To look for the silver lining in every problem? To find at least one good quality in people who annoy me or situations that aggravate me?

Added Workout Benefits

Second, collecting trash provides a moderate workout. The more you pick up, the heavier your bag. Bonus resistance training! And bending over to pick up 300+ pieces of trash means your hamstrings, lower back, and glutes get extra stretching. I consider myself to be in good shape, but I recognize the value of additional circuit training, which trash pick-up can become. If you struggle to fit in exercise, or even hate the thought, don’t call it exercise, call it “greening your neighborhood.”

Increased Motivation

Third, as my trash numbers grow, my dedication to saving wildlife, setting a positive example for my daughter, beautifying my hometown, and contributing to the community in an empowering way increases. On day four of OcTraPiMo, a fellow dog walker noticed what I was doing… and thanked me. Nothing inspires me more than being helpful and feeling like I’m making a difference.

What one thing can you do today and (if you are feeling courageous) every day in October, to create change around you? Join the conversation.

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Learn How to Get Unstuck: First Limit Choices

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As I worked on blog post ten this week (twenty percent of the way toward my blogging goal), I hit a few snags and couldn’t get unstuck. (See, it happens to everyone!) The problems? First, I needed more time to do justice to my top choice for the week’s post; and second, the flood of other possible ideas overwhelmed me. I ground to a halt, and if not for my deadline of a blog a week, I might have stayed stuck. I decided my top priority was to limit choices.

Mason Lake with Mt. Defiance and fall colors in the background. Limit choices to get unstuck. Photo courtesy of Tonia Olson.

Unlimited Choice Can Be As Hard As Having Too Few

But my problem pales in comparison to what my daughter, a senior in high school, currently faces. What is the best way to coach her through the college application and selection process? She sometimes finds it hard to choose a cookie recipe to make or a frozen yogurt flavor to order. With hundreds of potential colleges, what’s the best way to narrow them down? If she could find a dozen that interested her, we’d help her apply to the top six. After all, what worked for me way back when could at least be a starting point.

I also faced what I call the “all-or-nothing” phenomenon earlier this week. I had an opportunity to hike on Tuesday, but I couldn’t decide on a destination. My non-decision ended up being my decision: I stayed in town on a beautiful day.

Later in the week when a friend proposed hiking to Mason Lake, I agreed. I appreciate it when someone else decides. Other times, it feels liberating to make my own choice. But sometimes, having unlimited choices is daunting.

How to Start Narrowing Down

So where do you start if you feel like you want to make changes? Say you want to alter your diet, start a different job, take steps forward in an important relationship, grab some new travel opportunities, expand your friendship circle, interact more with family members, and improve your physical health.

If you tried undertaking all of that at once, you would fail to succeed in any of them. What do you do if you want to change everything? The answer may be to limit your choices first by picking THE MOST IMPORTANT GOAL (whatever is weighing most heavily on your mind) and to provide yourself with a structure to explore it.

Whenever I face a blank page, it’s far easier to create if I’m given a prompt, an idea, or a structure within which to write. Take blogging: I limit myself to eight photos, keep my word count under 1200, and stick to the same format I’ve used during the past three months. I also tie whatever I write to the broad topic of moving forward and getting unstuck. Such scaffolding provides me with structure and coherence, and it provides my readers with continuity from post to post. Even so, I still face plenty of choices but it’s not as overwhelming as it could be.

On Having Too Many Choices

Curious about shutting down when I feel overwhelmed by too many choices, I looked online to learn what others had to say. Suddenly, I had my topic for this week’s blog.

From the article, Too many choices – good or bad – can be mentally exhausting. In the April issue of Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2008, Kathleen Vohs discusses how making decisions, even about fun tasks like what movie to see or where to hike, can deplete our brain. “Simply the act of choosing can cause mental fatigue,” she says. “Making choices can be difficult and taxing, and there is a personal price to choosing.”

In a study discussed in the article Why you find it hard to pick your lunch or a Netflix show, according to new research, Colin Camerar (professor of behavioral economics at Caltech and author of the study) said the “ideal number [of choices] is probably somewhere between 8 and 15, depending on the reward, and your personality.”

When “Good Enough” is Good Enough

And in Too Many Choices, a Problem that can Paralyze, Alina Tugend of the New York Times introduces Barry Schwartz, author of The Paradox of Choice. Schwartz says one strategy for dealing with too many choices is to become comfortable with the idea of “good enough.”

In coaching our daughter through the largest decision (so far) of her young life, we don’t want her to think she has to make a perfect choice, because according to the Swarthmore professor, doing so “is a recipe for misery.” If we can get past the illusion that there is a “perfect choice” and choose good enough, we will save ourselves pondering and reflection time, worry, and angst.

Take-Aways

The next time you’re debating about what to choose, impose some restrictions. If you’re experiencing writer’s block, set a timer for five minutes and allow yourself to play. Let your pen move nonstop across the page, or let your fingers fly over the keyboard. Or get outside in nature for some fresh air and movement. Sometimes taking your mind off the problem will give your creative self some inspiration or clarity.

If you have the whole state of Washington available to hike in, try narrowing it down to a single target area, with a possible elevation gain and range that fits your ability and mood. Washington Trails Association’s Hike Finder is a great resource.

And when I discovered the guideline of having an optimal number of choices in the range of eight to fifteen, I realized that encouraging my daughter to have a list of her top twelve choices is a reasonable place to start. What’s more, I realized we intuitively already know how to do this.

So if you’re dating a new person every weekend, put some limits on your choices. If you’re looking at the whole world as a possible travel destination, pick one or two areas to start narrowing down. And when you’re choosing a subject to write about, realize that you can always write another, next week. I did. And like that, I was up and writing again.

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Finding Inspiration in Life and Graphic Novels: Oracle Code

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What I’m Reading: Oracle Code

When I look closely, I’m finding inspiration everywhere, including the Young Adult (YA) graphic novel, The Oracle Code, by Marieke Nijkamp. I’d borrowed this book from the library several times, but I’d overlooked it until I noticed it on a list of recommended books similar to others I’d enjoyed.

I'm finding inspiration just about everywhere, including Young Adult graphic novels. — I’m finding inspiration just about everywhere, including Young Adult graphic novels.

Oracle Code Summary

Hacker Barbara “Babs” Gordon gets injured in a shooting accident and finds herself in a wheelchair trying to solve the puzzle behind the unusual rehabilitation center her father sends her to. When Jena, a new friend at the center, disappears, Babs enlists the help of Benjamin, a rooftop hacking friend from outside the center, to try to help her solve the mystery.

A female protagonist (check!) overcoming physical obstacles (check!) in a mystery (check!) Sounds a lot like something I’ve helped people do for over two decades. Perhaps that’s why it resonated with me.

Quotes that Inspire

Two quotes from Nijkamp’s story jumped out at me.

Finding Inspiration in Life and Graphic Novels: Oracle Code — My daughter is a constant source of inspiration. Here she celebrates her first-place entry and Reserve Grand Champion ribbon for her Legos submission at the Puyallup Fair.

On Losing

“Losing is only permanent if you stop trying.” (p. 95) Another way to say it is the only way you can lose is to quit completely. As long as you are willing to try new things, explore different ideas, and consider a variety of ways to reach your end goal, you are still in the game of life.

One of the very first hikes I went on when I moved to Seattle in 1990 was Mt. Si. At the time, it seemed like a fun way to get outside with a friend from graduate school for some exercise. In 1999, my husband and I joined the Basic Climbing program with the Seattle Mountaineers. Hikes became a way to get in condition for technical peaks. Our daughter joined us in 2004, and our dozen annual climbs shrank to one a year. Hikes became very short.

When Governor Inslee closed all hiking trails in Washington in March of 2020, I felt a profound sense of loss–of freedom, independence, choice, fresh air, discovery, and exploration. I had to get back on the trails. At the very first opportunity, the day Inslee lifted restrictions, I returned to the trails and have been hiking ever since, sometimes three times a week. I had no idea when I started hiking that it would grow into something so important.

On Fear

If something prevents you from doing what you want to do, like COVID did for me eighteen months ago, try to name it. Would you call it fear? Uncertainty? Overwhelm?

Nijkamp writes: “It’s fear that keeps us sharp, that keeps us going, that keeps us figuring out the unknown.” (p. 190) The next time you’re afraid, ask yourself: what’s the worst thing that can happen? Can you expect the best while being prepared for the worst? How likely will that fear materialize? Who can support you if it does?

Inspiration from Others’ Demons

Lest everyone out there thinks trainers waltz up every mountain they choose, please realize that I could have let any one of three big obstacles stop me. My hope is my story will inspire you to move forward.

Lower Back Pain

While I’ve never been in a wheelchair like Nijkamp’s protagonist, Babs, I have battled lower back pain since the late 1990s. I first noticed problems while rowing starboard for my college’s crew. However, it only became debilitating when I competed in powerlifting, a sport involving single-repetition maximum lifts in the squat, the deadlift, and the bench press.

Flare-ups sometimes last for days, and even now, if I neglect my sleep, get too stressed out, eat foods I know cause systemic inflammation, or take shortcuts with my training, I end up hunched over like a ninety-year-old woman. Lower back pain is no fun for anyone. Fortunately, by learning to manage mine, I can also help others manage theirs. I’ve turned adversity into an opportunity.

Sugar Addiction

Until July 2019, I was addicted to sugar. Giving up sugar was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. Alcoholics can avoid liquor; drug addicts can stop using; gamblers can steer clear of casinos and betting. But since sugar is pretty much added to everything these days (beyond the obvious sweets, it’s also found in breath mints, gum, yogurt, tomato sauce, dried fruit, nearly every cereal, etc.), it requires hyper-vigilance to avoid consuming.

(Note: If you feel you or a loved one is battling addiction, whether to drugs, alcohol, gaming, exercise, gambling, etc., a great resource is In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts by Gabor Mate.)

Now I cringe thinking about how many batches of cookies, bars of chocolate, bags of mint M&M’s, cans of sodas, and bottles of diet Peach Snapple I’ve consumed over the past three decades. When I reread some of my journals, I know that my earlier obsession with food was likely fueled by a psychological dependence on sugar. Struggling to overcome not one but five addictions gives me tremendous empathy for the struggles of my clients. I know firsthand how enormously challenging it is. And if I can find a way through it, so can my clients.

Skin Cancer

One look at my freckles and red hair and you can probably guess I’m of Scotch-Irish heritage. I’ve had four Moh’s procedures to remove skin cancers from my face and additional surgeries to remove basal cell carcinomas. For two summers, I wouldn’t go outside between 9 a.m. and 3 p.m. unless every inch of my skin was covered. Now, I know how to choose appropriate hikes and manage the timing of my outings to keep my skin protected. I also know how crucial it is to get natural vitamin D from sufficient exposure to the sun while not burning.

So what?

Every single one of us carries baggage or has reasons to quit. We will always face obstacles and struggles. And until I can no longer breathe, I know I will continue to be challenged. Take a good hard look at what you’re carrying around. How has it weighed you down? What can you do to overcome it?

Because you can. You are the hero or heroine of your own story. One of my favorite song lyrics comes from Kelly Clarkson’s Stronger. Obstacles test us and make us grow stronger and wiser. Use greatness everywhere — fiction and biographies, songs and hikes — to help motivate you.

Final Thoughts

A sign over my desk includes a quote by Nelson Mandela: “I never lose. I either win or learn.” As long as you keep trying new things, you have not lost. I admire courage like Babs’ in The Oracle Code who shows inner strength to adapt and move on with her life. Reading about female protagonists overcoming tremendous physical adversity inspires me to take better care of myself.

When you feel like giving up, think about why you started in the first place. Whether you run marathons, climb mountains, play music, or write poetry, you do it for some reason. What does that thing provide you? What could it provide you if you let go of your fear and the word can’t? Can you get back in touch with the younger you and feel the joy, excitement, or curiosity you first had?

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Try Something New, Get Out of Your Way, Get Unstuck

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The comment I heard most often from clients this past week is, “I keep getting in my own way. How do I get unstuck?” Could it be as simple as trying something new? A quick search through the holdings at the Seattle Public Library revealed at least a dozen self-help books with “get out of your way” in the title. This must be a common phenomenon. Why do we do it and how do we stop?

Try Something New, Get Out of Your Way, Get Unstuck — A burst of fall color in an alpine meadow heading up to Melakwa Lake, off Exit 47 north of I-90.

Be Still to Get Unstuck

In a recent issue of PNWA’s Author Magazine, Jennifer Paros wrote about being still in order to see our current reality, so we can get unstuck and move forward. This is a paradoxical concept, especially if you’re as accomplished with “doing” as I am. In fact, clients have heard me say, “If you feel deep down that you’re a climber, yet you’ve never hiked, how can you know unless you get outside and try it?” Perhaps the stillness Paros alludes to comes in pausing, quieting the doubts, and trusting oneself enough so that the path forward can make itself known.

Similarly, if you feel you’re a good enough writer to get published, yet you have never submitted your work for anyone else to read, how do you know? And can you find the courage to keep writing with only that inner knowing to sustain you, or might a critique group help you find out for sure? What if you entered a writing contest or self-published a piece to see what kind of response you get? What stops you from trying something new?

Create Goals to Get Unstuck

Hiking to Melakwa Lake had been on my “goals” list all summer. The mist that my pup Ajax and I encountered this week reminded me of the fear-and-doubt fog I allowed to obscure my path toward starting a blog. For seven years, I’d convinced myself I had nothing more to share after publishing my first book.

Yet in July 2021, I had no deadlines, no agent, no editor breathing down my neck. I also felt like I lacked direction and purpose. Wanting to have something to show for the summer, I had nothing to lose. It dawned on me that I wanted to write whatever I wanted to write. In two weeks, I took a leap of faith and launched my blog. All it took was two short weeks.

But, like Social Media posts, people only see the happy end result. I never revealed those seven years of being stuck. Did I even KNOW I was stuck?

Quiet the Voice of the Gremlin

My gremlin still tries to make her voice heard: “Think of what you could be doing today if you’d started the blog seven years ago.” To that little green monster, I stand with my hands on my hips, and say, “Better late than never.” Every time I successfully accomplish something I set out to do, the voice of the gremlin grows softer, weaker, fading like ethereal fog.

Whether you’ve wanted to climb for a decade, wished you could publish a poem, yearned to be a better communicator, or dreamed about furthering your education, every goal begins with a single step. But which one?

Rename Your Blocks

As a trainer and former climb leader with the Seattle Mountaineers, I have ventured into the mountains for over two decades. Some people think I just go out and do stuff without much worry or thought. If they knew the behind-the-scenes of my daily exercise routine (including how long it takes to pick a hike) they would know that’s not true.

No matter how much I train, every time I visit the mountains I feel a small element of doubt and fear that I have renamed excitement. As I get better at taking calculated risks, my sphere of comfort expands.

What will it take to get outside your comfort zone? Can you embrace whatever blocks you? Can you think of it as protecting you from the unknown? What if you renamed your block and rewrote your script? What if you set an intention and then carried it out?

Just like your muscles need to be regularly overloaded to get stronger, your mind needs a challenge, test, push. Think of it as exercising the habit of following through. If you never hike, you won’t get to the top of a mountain under your own power. You will not publish your work unless you find the courage to send it out into the world.

So, on a rainy Sunday morning following a restful night’s sleep, Ajax and I drove to Exit 47, and instead of turning left as we’d been doing all summer, we turned right.

A Visit to Misty Melakwa Lake

Why did I wait until the end of summer to attempt this hike? It wasn’t the mileage or gain; Ajax and I had covered fifteen miles together and ascended 4,000 feet on recent hikes. It also wasn’t driving distance; we had been to Exit 47 half a dozen times this summer. I think it was more about the uncertainty of maneuvering through the Denny Creek campground, the hassle of adding extra distance at the start and end of the hike, and not knowing how many people would be out hiking on a rainy weekend after Labor Day.

Lame, right? Really, what’s an extra half-mile? And what is really blocking us? Maybe I still wanted to hike with a buddy; it had been a month since I’d gone out solo. Those “solo hiking muscles” had gotten weak. Time to give them a workout.

Melakwa Lake is a popular hiking destination, perhaps due to the emerald green color and clear alpine water. But close proximity to the heavily used Denny Creek Campground probably increases foot traffic for those local hikes under ten miles. Apparently, it also has a decent scramble that will get you up high enough to look at Gem Lake, Glacier Peak, and the North Cascades on a clear day.

Favorites

My favorite parts were:

Fall colors – one of the reasons I went to that particular location
Seeing two new-to-me emerald lakes, Upper and Lower (this has been the season for new lakes)
Pika!! One came so close to the trail I got a shot of him with my camera phone
Handfuls of ripe blueberries and huckleberries, even bigger and more plentiful than the ones we picked the previous weekend on Mt. Catherine
Clean, pure exercise with my favorite canine companion
An hour of solitude when we veered off the beaten path to explore the trail leading from Melakwa Lake to Lower Tuscohatchie Lake

Pitfalls

The parts I could have done without (aren’t there always some of these?)

Rain, with mud in places; I’ve gotten used to a summer of dryness, but nothing a good dog bath couldn’t cure
Fog obscuring what I know must be stellar views, reminding me again of my recent trip to Blanca Lake
Slick, rocky trail in places that reminds me of part of the approach to Mt. Washington
Crowds. As we ascended the switchbacks we could hear the conversations of people in the valley behind us for a half-mile. If we are seeking a solitary experience, then we need to hike popular trails on weekdays or avoid them.

Today’s Step to Get Unstuck

What could you do TODAY that you keep putting off? What small five-minute task could you take that would get you one step closer to your goal and help you start building that follow-through muscle? For me, turning right instead of left committed me to try a hike that had been on my list all summer. Perhaps signing up with a coach or talking with someone you trust can help you figure out your next step.

Pause, feel whatever you’re feeling, and then take that next step, saying goodbye to that place of comfort, that previous place of familiarity. My wish for you is that you not wait seven years to do something that might take two weeks. Do you have favorite ways for getting unstuck or getting out of your own way? I would love to hear about them in the comments box.

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How to Let Go: Lessons from Cultivating Raspberries

Earlier this summer, my teenage daughter expressed interest in planting raspberry bushes in our backyard. In the back of my mind, I thought about weeding, watering, bramble rangling, and additional care that might add to my workload when she starts college next fall. Since I am our designated lawn caretaker, anything outside the walls of our home falls on my shoulders, until I learn how to delegate. This was her project, not mine. Could I let her be the driver? I would have to let go of her sooner or later. I didn’t expect it this soon.

Two ever-bearing raspberry plants flanking a transplant from a friend's garden. Letting my daughter take the reins on such a project taught me how to let go. — Two ever-bearing raspberry plants flanking a transplant from a friend’s garden. Letting my daughter take the reins on such a project taught me how to let go.

Don’t get me wrong, I adore time outside, from hiking and forest bathing to volunteering at Woodland Park Zoo, to grounding and journaling in our yard. But removing berry brambles, ivy, dandelions, and bamboo grass is my least favorite garden chore. Give me a pruner, lopper, lawnmower, broom, or rake and I’m happy. Did I really want to add more chores? Could I hand over this project to someone and keep my hands off? And what about the fruit? Ambivalence seized me: wanting and not wanting change at the same time.

Sound familiar?

Gardening During a Drought and Pandemic

If you have any sort of garden, you might think this is a silly topic to blog about. I’ve always thought of myself as having a brown, not green, thumb. I am quite proud of the fact that once we got our backyard wildlife habitat established in 2011, we turned it over to Mother Nature. Seems like I always forget to water my indoor plants, even succulents, African violets, or cacti, which are all supposed to be hardy.

If my daughter succeeded in cultivating raspberry bushes and they produced fruit, would she follow through on her promise to take care of them? Would they even survive one of the worst droughts the state has seen? Would our dog dig them up before they got established? Would future droughts wipe them out?

Teaching Teenagers about Goal Setting

We added “plant raspberries” to our family “to do” list on our 50/50 house project, but weeks passed without any progress. Would it be a wish that never bore fruit (pun intended)?

However, in mid-August, my husband decided to encourage and support her enthusiasm for raspberries. The two of them sat down and discussed the steps necessary to build a raspberry garden. After developing a list of questions, my husband gave my daughter an assignment to call the nursery before they closed at 6 p.m. the next day.

Setting SMART goals

What are the steps for setting goals? I’ve written and taught clients about SMART goals as they relate to climbing mountains, so I know that to make and accomplish a goal you need to keep it:

Specific – plant three ever-bearing raspberry bushes in time to have fall fruit
Measurable – provide a quantitative assessment so you know when you’ve achieved it
Action-oriented – break the goal into small steps such as preparing the soil, calling about products and prices, acquiring plants, putting them in the ground
Realistic – make sure you have time and means, then follow through
Time-stamped – provide a deadline, IN WRITING, to commit.

In this case, if she wanted any chance of having berries this year, she had to follow through before the end of the week. She had the steps and support she needed, now she just needed a nudge. Were we missing anything?

Internal Resistance

It turns out that the SMART acronym does NOT address everything. What about a person’s internal resistance? Wanting something to change but also not wanting it at the same time? That was all on me.

I tried to focus on the positives: how walking her through a small project like this might spill over into large, seemingly insurmountable tasks like choosing a college, hunting for a job, finding an apartment. My husband had been the spearhead behind starting our company, twenty-three years ago, launching our extensive home remodel fifteen years ago, our yard project ten years ago, and planning most of our international vacations. He is a master planner. I’m more of a pantser–in writing terminology, someone who flies by the seat of my pants rather than outlining or plotting. (Not, as my teen pointed out, someone who yanks down pants!)

Part of the reason I felt compelled to start a blog all by myself was to own my path, to get myself unstuck, and to prove to myself that I can develop a growth mindset in other areas of my life. Why not teach that exact same process to our daughter? Today, she could be planting raspberry bushes; tomorrow, she might set a PR in javelin or choose the right college.

I thought about my daughter’s interest in painting a bird feeder for our yard a dozen years ago. That small interest set off a ripple effect that led to hundreds of family birding trips over the last decade. It led to my husband becoming a Master Birder through Seattle Audubon. Might her interest in growing raspberries lead to her becoming a gardener in the future or getting even more interested in science? We had to let her plant those proverbial seeds. Even if, in this case, the “seeds” were already plants.

Better yet, it might help me grow a growth mindset. Rewrite those negative messages. And if I was struggling, I could blog about the process and perhaps help others change. But the real “why” hit me after I finished my first draft of this blog post: Could letting her grow a garden help launch me into loosening the apron strings and letting her become the capable adult we both want her to become?

Appropriate Skills

Precision Nutrition’s Psychology of Change course has a slightly different approach to goal setting. They use GSPA, or goals, skills, practices, and actions. Once you set a specific “smart” goal – whether you want to lose weight, climb a mountain, publish a book, or plant a garden – you need to develop the skills needed to reach that goal.

For example, if you want to climb a mountain, you will need a different skill set than someone who runs marathons. While both require endurance, mountaineering involves carrying an overnight pack for many hours, over multiple days, on varied terrain with substantial elevation gain and loss. Distance runners often think climbing to the summit of a 14er will be easy… until they realize training only for endurance doesn’t yield success. What skills do you need to reach your goal?

In the case of gardening, a few of the skills we needed to teach our daughter were:

Physicality – ability to dig dry soil, water plants, weed without getting prickled, and return things where they belong (are you laughing? then you don’t have a teenager!)
Curiosity – ability to seek answers or ask questions of those who may know more than you
Beginner’s mindset – ability to admit you don’t know everything (still laughing? see number one) and be willing to fail and learn from it

Right Practices

Someone writing a book will need the practice (i.e. habit) of consistently writing, even if that’s fifteen minutes a day. A person with a mountaineering goal will need to include strength training, pack carrying (i.e. hiking), alpine skills, and aerobic training. A gardener needs to develop observation skills by visiting the plants daily and learning about soil, leaf color, insects, and weeds. And all of these goals require patience.

Someone trying to develop a growth mindset needs to question those niggling thoughts racing through their mind. Is this truth? Where did I get this idea? Can I explore other ideas? If I believed this thought to be false, what might I replace it with?

In short, to replace a fixed mindset with a growth mindset, we need to be open to opportunities that can teach us to expand our horizons, try new things, and embrace making mistakes.

Bite-Sized Actions

What small actions can you take today to move toward your goal, whatever it may be? If you want to climb a mountain but you haven’t exercised consistently in months, can you start with regular walks around your neighborhood? If you already walk, can you try a short hike? If you can hike, can you add weight to your pack? Can you experiment with more elevation gain or maintain a faster pace?

If your goal is to summit Mt. Rainier, break it down to the skills, practices, and actions a person would need to succeed. If you want to start a blog, figure out what you will write about, how often you will post, and learn about web hosting options and writing software. Commit to a time each day to write. If you want to plant a garden, figure out what you want to plant, who has garden knowledge who would be willing to talk to you, and then acquire the seeds or starter plants and plant them.

On change

Change is hard, but it is not rocket science. Goal setting can be motivating. Getting past ambivalence and following through can be very challenging, especially when you are trying to relinquish control. I’m not proud of the fact that I have been a helicopter parent at times. I’m trying very hard to change that.

Try asking yourself why you want what you want. Ask yourself again, why is that important? Four more times, ask WHY until you touch on your deep core values and know what you’re really after. In this case, we are after an independent, self-assured child who can confidently head off to college in a year. Scary how much we still have to teach.

For me, despite my initial reservations about her project, buying into planting a raspberry patch meant providing my daughter with valuable life skills she can use for any goal. My husband and daughter worked hard on this project. My part? Merely the photographer. Once I saw the beaming smile on her face, I knew that letting her follow through with this was the right decision. Will the plants bear fruit? Will they survive the drought? Will they produce in coming years? Does it really matter?

Denis Waitley put it much more eloquently: “The greatest gifts you can give your children are the roots of responsibility and the wings of independence.” We already had the proverbial bird lesson covered (wings); we needed to get to the roots (via gardening.) My heartfelt gratitude to my daughter and husband for reminding me, in a bite-sized lesson, exactly what this blog is about: roots and wings and finding the courage to change.

Featured

Finding Empowerment on the Wallace Lake Loop Trail

In May 2020, when the state of Washington’s governor Jay Inslee reopened public hiking trails, my options were to hike alone with my dog Ajax, or hike with him and one person. Lucky for me, Ajax is a wonderful hiking partner, and the two of us have done dozens of hikes together during the past eighteen months, even if I couldn’t find a human companion. Our trip to Wallace Lake included a close friend.

I treasure trips I take with a human buddy. Like all of my visits to the Woodland Park Zoo, I always learn something new from our conversations. On August 3, 2021, we joined a close friend and her dog to explore Wallace Lake loop, a nine-mile loop in a Washington State Park off US Highway 2. We headed upward along the wooded Greg Ball trail, a gently ascending path built in the memory of the gentleman who launched the trail maintenance program within the Washington Trails Association. This blog post highlights some of the topics of conversation we had about moving forward.

EMPOWERMENT

One of our topics inevitably turned to a discussion of my recently launched blog. I mentioned the term empowerment and how successes in one area of your life often bleed into others.

The evening I launched my blog, I received an email from a former client who was getting discouraged about some tough challenges. Remembering our tumultuous history, I could have deleted the message, but instead, I paused and thought about the confidence I’d gained during my recent success. Perhaps I could try something different.

And I did: I sent her some carefully thought-out suggestions for ideas she could think about with no strings attached. After all, if I could branch out in a new direction and launch a blog on my own, what else might I be able to do if I just tried?

Similarly, if you reflect on areas of your life that are working well, what are some of the skills you used to get there? What are some of the tasks you routinely do that others find useful, maybe even important? Is there some way to use those same skills and strengths in a different area of your life where you might not feel as satisfied (yet), in order to make progress?

Finding Empowerment on the Wallace Lake Loop Trail — Courtenay and her dog Ajax pause for some smooches in front of one of the Wallace Falls.

CREATIVE DISCOVERY THROUGH PLANTAR FASCIITIS

As we continued beyond the lake to the falls we’d visited months earlier in April, our conversation turned to another exercise I’d experienced during a horrendously debilitating case of plantar fasciitis years ago. Because it had hurt even to walk, I spent a lot of time that summer writing. I even tried a journaling technique that involved getting in touch with different parts of my body.

The voice of my brain was one color of ink, my heart, another; I used a third for my injured foot, a fourth for my inner critic, a fifth for my gut instincts, and a sixth for the sane, adult part of my brain which, when not stressed, remains in harmony with the rest of me. My task? To let each part of my body “talk” to one another on the page.

I laugh now because as the colors battled for time on the page, my sane, adult voice pretty remained silent until all the others had their say. My injured foot insisted, “I’m putting my foot down. No more exercising. I need rest. And if I have to shut the rest of you down to get it, so be it.”

What I learned from that journal exchange was that the self-inflicted overuse injury was my body’s way of demanding recovery. Ever since, I’ve insisted that my athletes adhere to active recovery (or rest) days in their programs, even if they think daily hard training is the answer.

If you experience a physical limitation or injury or are dealing with something holding you back, consider asking the obstacle what role it is playing in your life.

Is there an addiction or bad habit you’d like to replace? While every habit or addiction is there for some reason, whenever you outgrow that reason, it’s time to look at how it served you and how another habit might work better for you.

If you can come to terms with whatever your block is trying to tell you, instead of getting mad at yourself because you are stuck, you might be able to start taking the necessary steps to move forward.

ROLE-PLAYING USING TWO EMPTY CHAIRS

Icky, sticky situations can provide challenges for anyone, but especially for those of us who tend to be more introverted. Another technique I’ve learned from various parenting classes is role-playing but by yourself. Whether you need to have a crucial conversation with a spouse or partner, address a child with some tough love, or talk to a friend or colleague about how you’re being treated, this technique may help.

Sit in a chair with another facing you, and state your side of the story to the empty chair as simply and concisely as you can. Take a deep breath and then switch to the opposite chair and try to imagine how the other person you want to address might react to your comments. What would their body language reveal? How would they look at you? What would their voice sound like? Really “listen” to what the other person might say or how they might react.

Then return to the first chair and respond. Bring up as many obstacles as possible so you can practice your reaction. Change up the dialog and situation until you feel better prepared for the unexpected. Like the multiple color pens exercise, this one allows the exploration of different options in a safe environment and can provide powerful insights.

RIPPLE EFFECT

As we rejoined the masses of people (and their dogs) who were making their way upward to the lower, middle, and upper falls as we descended, I had a chance to contemplate the way conversations ripple outward to and through whoever is sharing information. If one of my hiking buddies or clients finds something that I say to be useful, I want to send it out to others.

If someone reading my blog finds the information to be helpful, they might share it with others. In that way, the thoughts I share in my small corner of the universe have the power to ripple outward, just like a stone in a puddle or pond. May the exercises suggested above move through you to invoke change and provide upward and forward momentum.

How to Thrive Alone: Facing Challenges on Election Day

On Tuesday I escaped to the mountains to avoid the growing tension around national elections. I planned to hike to Thompson Lake via the Granite Creek Trail and ended up adding a stop at Granite Lake, too. This hike allowed me to gauge my physical and emotional progress in 2024. What’s more, I enjoyed an early snowfall. I never would have guessed back on August 21, during my first solo hike without Ajax (you may recall my encounter with three bears) that I could thrive alone merely ten weeks later.

The boulder field above Thompson Lake was covered in 3-4 inches of snow.

Facing Unexpected Elements

From my weather research, I expected a break in the storms. But forecasts are not always accurate. Especially in the mountains this time of year. The first challenge I faced was to prepare for anything.

Mine was the only car in the parking lot Tuesday morning when I headed out just before 7 a.m. I’d hiked part of the Granite Creek trail twice this year, once with Ajax before his injury, and the other with my daughter. For the first hour, things looked promising. At the waterfall halfway between the bridge and the Thompson/Granite Lakes Junction sign (what I will refer to from here on out as the Junction), it started to sleet, forcing me to pull out my waterproof jacket. Fortunately, it didn’t last long.

First Snow!

Once I passed the Junction, I could see a trace of snow collecting on the ground. Sleet turned to big fluffy flakes the higher I went. I smiled, as I prefer snow to rain any day of the week.

Animals use trails as the paths of least resistance, too!

The snow grew deeper, reaching 3-4 inches by the time I reached the dark woods between Thompson and Granite Lakes. Tracks appeared in the snow — deer, rabbit, perhaps fox? A trip report from 3 days prior said they’d turned back at the ridge above Thompson Lake. The world grew muffled until I could see only my tracks. Another smile. I had the mountain all to myself.

Progress and Distance

The second challenge I faced was the distance of the hike. Completing 14.2 miles with 3400 feet of elevation gain solo is a lot, particularly in November. There aren’t as many people on the trail in case something goes wrong. Daylight is shorter. The weather can get dicey. And snow can mask the trail, slowing you down even more.

I did it! I reached Thompson Lake solo in the snow, a trip Ajax and I tried earlier this summer.

But I’d hiked several 13-mile routes in the past few months. What’s another mile? I was having such a great time, enjoying the freedom of the hills, that I wasn’t in any hurry to return to reality. What surprised me, however, was my willingness to jump from 13 to 16 miles.

What’s Another 1.5 Miles?

That’s right. I added a side trip to Granite Lake, tacking on 1.5 miles to the 14.2 I’d intended. I was there, I felt strong, and my pace was solid, so I went for it. At the lower elevation, snow turned to rain. After a quick bite, I returned along the muddy trail to the junction, encountering a woman with two dogs who told me she wasn’t feeling particularly energetic. I shared some beta about both trails before wishing her luck.

For the final mile, the sun joined me. I’d had everything — sleet, hail, wind, rain, snow, and sun. And the clothing and knowledge to handle it all. The metaphor was not lost on me. The more tools and experience we have to handle the complexities of life, the more options we have to roll with whatever comes up.

Previous human tracks by some natural benches before entering the dark woods between Thompson and Granite Lakes. Snow depth was about 3-4 inches.

Not only was I physically and mentally prepared for a 16-mile day, but I could do it with the trail covered, in driving hail or drifting powdery flakes, or in bright sunshine, all with a smile on my face. Adding that extra distance showed me what’s possible when I’m fully engaged and enjoying the journey. Invincible!

Counting Streams, Missing Companionship

My third challenge was filling seven hours without Ajax or a friend beside me. Three activities helped. The first was keeping track of stream crossings. A few years ago during a winter hike to Pratt Lake, my friend Tonia and I mimicked the Sesame Street muppet, the Count. He took such delight in counting lightning strikes. I did the same, counting water flowing across the stream. Between the bridge and the waterfall, I counted 15. (15 wonderful water features! Bwahahaha!) From the waterfall to the Junction, there were 22.

The second activity was studying animal tracks as I hiked, imagining the prints compared to what Ajax leaves on our walks and guessing where the wild creatures might be in the middle of the day. And the third was listening closely for any birds. My favorite moment of the entire hike was when I paused briefly on the climb from Thompson Lake back to the ridge.

When you hike alone, you can't take any photos of people. So I look for delight in the landscape, from mushrooms to heart rocks to snow prints and downy woodpeckers. — When you hike alone, you can’t take any photos of people. So I look for delight in the landscape, from mushrooms to heart rocks to snow prints and downy woodpeckers.

I heard a faint twitter and glanced around, wondering what bird could be making that sound. There! Tap tap – a woodpecker! Finally, I spotted it, then smiled when I saw two downy woodpeckers chittering softly at each other as they foraged for insects under the bark. captures the bittersweet reality of growth—learning to move forward independently while still holding onto fond memories of past companionship.

Support of Preparation

My fourth challenge was making sure I had the right gear for an all-day solo outing. During my scouting trip to Big Creek Falls, I shared the story of having a degraded cell phone battery, rain gear that wasn’t waterproof, and no way to charge my phone. Although going all day meant carrying more weight, I barely noticed it. Fortunately, most of the grades on this trail were quite gradual.

At Granite Lake, I decided not to linger too long as snow turned to rain.

On this trip, my gear did beautifully. I had gaiters, microspikes, and trekking poles, a water-resistant coat (which I wore most of the time), a down coat (which I never used), a pack cover (which I pulled out as the snow turned to rain), plenty of food and water, a wool hat and gloves, and even a sitting pad.

Even though I did not use everything, I had it if I needed it. Just as we equip ourselves for hikes, we can build resilience for life by gathering the right skills and tools for our journey.

Beauty and the Balm of Nature

On election day, I desired self-soothing. I found it in the mountains. During my seven-hour trip, I encountered a total of five people and three dogs. Each person was hiking solo. Nobody discussed politics, only the conditions on the trail. Mother Nature is a wonderful equalizer.

I challenged myself mentally and physically and came back feeling revitalized. Personal growth, like this hike, is often a solo journey with ever-changing conditions. Every mile built confidence. Each stream crossing reminded me that I was making steady progress. And each type of weather was an opportunity to embrace change.

The final mile in the sun represented the light at the end of the tunnel. Whatever our struggles, wherever our journey takes us, I firmly believe there is always hope. For growth, for learning, for beauty, and the healing balm of nature. I wouldn’t have it any other way. May you find your ray of sunshine, hope, and empowerment this season of Thanksgiving.

How to Boost Your Energy in a Season of Change

For the past two weeks, I have provided moral support to my parents in the aftermath of Hurricane Helene. Our country faces an upcoming election unlike any other. As the light fades in the northern hemisphere, we prepare to shift clocks this weekend, which means the days for longer hikes grow fewer and farther between. And the holidays are just around the corner. How do you cope with mounting stress? What if you could boost your energy by pursuing what you love, getting creative with your adventures, or slowing down? That’s exactly what I tried.

On October 22, I visited Gold Creek Pond (above), The Tunnel, Lodge and Beaver Lakes, and Franklin Falls, uniquely combining four adventures into one lovely day.

I also looked for inspiring quotes, including this one by Abraham Maslow: “In any given moment, we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety.” While safety may feel desirable, in this season of change I find myself choosing growth.

Boost Your Energy 1: Have Novel Adventures

Despite everything going on — or, more truthfully, because of it — I spent as much time as I could exploring new trails in new situations. If you haven’t noticed by now, I adore hiking. It feels like I’m a bud opening and thirsting for more. The links are to WTA trip reports if you care to learn more.

Peaks at Snoqualmie Pass are reflected in Beaver Lake (Exit 52/Hyak) on the Pacific Crest Trail.

October 22: Lodge and Beaver Lakes solo on the PCT; I cherished the solitude and dusting of snow
Snoqualmie Tunnel; this was my third and final required “recent” hike with three Mountaineers
Gold Creek Pond solo; on this 1-mile loop, I wanted to shoot some gorgeous fall colors
Franklin Falls solo; to see how the Wagon Train Trail repairs are going
Big Creek Falls, October 26: Taylor River with friends to practice my mentor hike for November 23
Big Tree Trail and Shangri-La on Cougar Mountain, October 29, with Ajax and a friend
St. Edward State Park on a rainy Wednesday (October 30), collecting data for an upcoming nutrition talk
Shelton View Forest on Halloween with Ajax; this gem, 20 minutes from home, was a real treasure

Spooky Snoqualmie Tunnel

Three of these eight adventures stood out to me. On October 22, I linked together four shorter hikes (1-5 miles each) for a 14-mile day. I never realized that short driving breaks could boost your energy and leave you wanting more.

SPO-OO-OOKY! The Palouse to Cascade Tunnel at Exit 54 is worth exploring.

The Iron Horse Tunnel hike with the Mountaineers was perhaps the most memorable. The Tunnel at Exit 54 is 2.3 miles of mostly flat, packed gravel and requires walking by headlamp. When we got a mile in, we could only see a pinprick of light on either end. Someone had set up a few scary dolls in anticipation of Halloween.

We collected trash, talked and laughed, and stopped at each alcove to see what we might find. It’s a unique sensory experience with a great echo that everyone should try once. It also meant I was one step away from being a hike leader.

Big Creek Falls

On a rainy Saturday, two friends and I headed up the Middle Fork of the Snoqualmie to scout out the trail to Big Creek Falls. I had just posted a listing for my upcoming mentored hike before leaving. By the time I got home, the hike had already been filled, with people joining the waitlist. It proves how much need there is for off-season hike leaders to step up, a task I plan to take on come December.

I am now fascinated with new-to-me places. Why has it taken me so long to leave all the familiar trails? “When the student is ready, the teacher appears.” The mountains have more to teach me about leadership, courage, and adventure. But perhaps a better question is, “What adventures lie ahead in 2025?” I’m ready.

Need a way to boost your energy? Visit Big Creek Falls. It already has flowing water and is well worth the visit.

Our Big Creek hike taught me that my jacket is not waterproof; my phone battery was corrupted and no longer held a charge for a 3-hour hike; and I needed both a backup charging system and a dedicated car cord for my phone. Tech has never been my strong suit, but with a big enough WHY I have solved these problems and more.

Shelton View Forest

My third example of restful novelty came as a surprise. Need to boost your energy? Try visiting somewhere you’ve never been before. Shelton View Forest is a gem about 20 minutes north of my house. Ajax and I found a little of everything: 3 old cars. A Little Free Library with books in good repair. Rocks painted green and labeled with plant identification names. A “Telephone of the Wind” poem memorial. An Eagle Scout eagle’s nest.

Three cars are being reclaimed by nature.

Roots are painted orange for easier visibility in the fallen leaves. Boxes in a fairy garden offer kids arts and crafts projects. Ten benches beg to be enjoyed. Sense of humor signage (“wet way, other way”) made me giggle. Steep ravine walks burn the quads in an interval workout. And at the bottom of the ravine, solitude and silence await.

The sensory experience of the flat Tunnel walk, the Big Creek Falls scouting trip, and the delightful gem with Ajax made these three stand out above the others. All were new to me. None was physically demanding. Getting outside to enjoy nature and re-create ourselves can happen in many ways. We don’t always have to set a new PR (personal record), cover more distance, or carry more weight. Sometimes we can just go for the sake of exploring and enjoying ourselves.

Energy 2: Prepare for Something Scary

Another thing I love is helping people. The hike at St. Edward State Park last Wednesday provided a spark of energy. I had arranged ahead of time to join an outdoor exercise class to get comfortable with the participants. At the end of the class, I asked what kinds of questions they had about trekking nutrition. With their input, I am developing a free online class that will air before the end of the year.

The last time I spoke in front of more than 2-3 people at a time was pre-pandemic, so I felt nervous. But that energy helped me prepare suitable questions. When the day arrived, I joined the fun for two hours. It felt quite natural to segue into a 15-minute question-and-answer interaction at the end, listening to their needs. Brief but satisfying, especially since I may have found another niche I can fill.

Fall beauty energizes me. I love going on color walks, color hunts, and explorations in October, my favorite hiking month.

Each baby step toward growth helps me build confidence in a way that feels authentic. Just challenging enough to energize me, rather than shut me down. Instead of thinking, “There’s no way I can do this,” I now tell myself, “I’ve succeeded at each previous step. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.” Try making a list of simple things that boost your energy. Then include them regularly.

Boost Your Energy 3: Support Others

The third source of energy in the past few weeks has been finding diverse ways to support others, whether taking people on hikes or incorporating neuroscience into training sessions. And my parents updated our family on a video call to get us all on the same page. I’d been struggling to find a way to support them since my week-long in-person visit got canceled. Imagine my delight when my mother asked if I’d be her self-care accountability partner.

I dove in with 100% energy. I sent care packages. Cards. Texts with movement ideas from a color walk to a “leave a book, take a book” at a local little free library. My mother thanked me for the support. Things felt like they were going great.

Snow dusted the nearby peaks of Snoqualmie at Exit 52.

Clues to Back Off

But when a day or two lapsed in communication, instinct kicked in and I backed off. The last thing a coach wants to become is a nag. After a traumatic experience like living through a hurricane, a desire to return to normal is very strong. But the reality is my parents have numerous demands on their time. Like getting potable water daily. They may have phone service and electricity, but they’re still surviving. It may be another six weeks before they can think about returning to thriving.

Perhaps the best way to offer support is to let someone know I’m here in whatever capacity they need. Rest isn’t a luxury; it’s a necessity. While it may give me energy to support others, if the people I am trying to help withdraw, could it mean I’m trying too hard? I have let go of a few friendships that are too one-sided, with me putting in all the energy while getting little back. Like seasons, maybe relationships also ebb and flow.

Yes, Ajax still gets to go with me on adventures. But I limit him to under 8 miles and relatively tame elevation gain.

Boost Your Energy 4: Slow Down

When life spirals out of control, sometimes the best thing you can do to boost your energy is to slow down. Rest gives us the strength to face what’s next, whether that’s dealing with family, confronting community challenges, or starting new personal ventures. If I feel overwhelmed and pressed for time, my go-to energy booster is to take off my shoes and sit outside in my yard for a short period of grounding. In the rain, I use an umbrella. If it snows, I use water from my hot tub to melt a patch of snow.

What is your go-to method to slow down and reconnect with yourself? This season, permit yourself to pause. Rest is not a retreat; it’s the way forward. I’d love to hear your re-creating, rejuvenating strategies for the holiday season. Leave them in the comments so we can all learn.

Fall brilliance makes October my favorite month for hiking.

Turn Challenge into Strength: Shift from Doubts to Wins

This week featured outings to Otter Falls and Tiger’s Poo Poo Point. Challenges that once felt intimidating (solo hiking and hiking with strangers) have become familiar. My new challenges are returning to public speaking, developing new content, and testing neuroscience-based training methods with several clients. As I build skills in exploring the mountains in new ways, I am teaching my brain that whatever challenge I face today will become familiar tomorrow, no matter how scary it feels. You are never too old to learn, grow, and change.

Beautiful fall colors at the Issaquah Community Center where a group of 8 of us participated in a hike to Tiger Mountain's Poo Poo Point via the High School Trail. — Beautiful fall colors at the Issaquah Community Center where a group of 8 of us participated in a hike to Tiger Mountain’s Poo Poo Point via the High School Trail.

Celebrate What You’ve Accomplished

Last week’s disappointment faded into the background as I continued to face new challenges. When my hiking partner chose to wait for us in the car on Tuesday, Ajax and I explored the trail to Otter Falls ourselves. While I would have loved having company, I also embrace the newfound confidence I get exploring new trails. Visiting Granite Creek in June–my first solo new-to-me hike in years–opened the door to new possibilities. Now, I embrace exploring new trails by myself. Growth!

Fall colors - just a hint - at Otter Falls off I-90's Exit 34. — Fall colors – just a hint – at Otter Falls off I-90’s Exit 34.

On Friday, I joined a group of strangers for a new-to-me area of Tiger Mountain, Poo Poo Point via the High School Trail. I hiked to Poo Poo from the Chirico Trail last July 4th but hadn’t ever started from the Issaquah Community Center. Friday’s route is more interesting and less crowded than the Chirico Trail. Win! We had rain on both days, but rain no longer bothers me. I have evolved into a four-season hiker (strong wind is the main deterrent now) and look forward to leading hikes with the Mountaineers soon. Another win!

Non-Hiking Challenges

I’m also stepping into new challenges such as returning to public speaking and incorporating neuroscience into training sessions with clients. My resistance decreases with each step forward. All of these changes require the ability to adapt and move forward despite challenges. We can’t expect to make progress in huge leaps. Instead, it comes in micro-movements. It often feels like I’m moving at glacier speed, barely perceptible, until some nudge causes part of me to break forward, never to return to the previous state. Embrace change wherever it comes from. It’s a sign of growth and resilience.

Ajax looks out over the Middle Fork of the Snoqualmie River on the Otter Falls trail in the rain.

Takeaway: Look for Successes

Consider the past week. Make a short list of big events, appointments, conversations, or meetings you had. Was there anything new that you’ve never done before? How did it go? If not, how might you plan something new for the coming week? What can you celebrate from the past week? Give yourself time to visit a different store, explore a new park, or try a food or recipe you’ve never had before. Having new experiences fuels our brains and expands our lives.

Use a Challenge as Proof of Strength

One of my biggest unexpected successes occurred while I worked with a client. He shared a new problem with his foot and what he’s tried to help it. Mentally sifting through my neuroscience material, I tried several experiments and then asked him to remove his shoes. It turns out his narrow shoes had been creating a sore spot on his little toe. He showed me where he’d modified his insert and I had him experiment with sliding his fingers between tight toes to return them to their normal position. We discussed the possibility of getting shoes with a wider toe box to see if it helps.

Fall is mushroom season in the Pacific Northwest.

Later that afternoon he called, ecstatic. He’d visited three stores and finally acquired toe separators and a new pair of shoes. Delighted, he shared his success story: “I felt so powerful doing yard work all afternoon. It’s a miracle. Tell everyone about that toe separator trick, it works!” Big win!

Building Blocks

Despite previous doubts about whether I’ll ever master the thousands of hours of new material, I now see that ANY improvement is a win. I took a chance integrating the new material with years of client experience and it paid off. Any of the exercises I can teach successfully means victory. And the more victories my clients have, the more forward momentum and confidence I build.

While frustration can feel like a setback, perseverance builds resilience. Try to remember to use challenges as proof of your strength. If you can organize a hike, maybe you can use the same skills to organize a class. If you can eat well at home, perhaps you can use some of the same skills to eat well during travel. Skills are skills; the challenge is to tap into your creativity to use them in new ways.

Takeaway: Look for Learning Lessons

Look back on last week. Where were you challenged? Now that you’ve got some space away from the challenges, ask yourself: What did I learn? What could I do differently next time? What proof do I have that I am growing and becoming more resilient? If we see our challenges positively, we can move forward rather than stay stuck.

Reframe Self-Doubt into a Doable Challenge

How can we conquer self-doubt? Instead of seeing it as a barrier that prevents you from moving forward, perhaps you can frame it as a sign that you’re expanding outside of your comfort zone in meaningful ways. Self-doubt seems to be a natural part of any growth process.

We can view nervousness before public speaking as dread and anxiety, or we can frame it as excitement. The physiological response is the same: A nervous stomach, shallow breathing, faster heartbeat. But the words we use or the stories we tell ourselves (see any of Brene Brown’s research if you’re intrigued) help our minds feel better or worse about a given experience.

Three co-leaders enjoy a snack at Poo Poo Point. My next challenge after Tuesday's hike will be doing a mentored lead. — Three co-leaders enjoy a snack at Poo Poo Point. My next challenge after Tuesday’s hike will be doing a mentored lead.

To practice reframing doubt, try journaling about what is going well. In other words, identify your Gains rather than getting stuck in the Gap. You can spend more time on preparation, such as outlining and practicing your talk; scouting out new hikes before you lead them; and trying exercises on friends or family before you charge clients for a session. And you can share what you think with mentors or peers who can provide objective feedback. They can help you identify and grow your strengths rather than focusing on weaknesses.

Takeaway: Look for Your Unique Skills

Think about the last challenge you had that was similar to one you’re feeling doubtful about. When I get nervous about public speaking, I envision all of the times in the past that I’ve done well, rather than the two that didn’t go well. Instead of dwelling on the negatives, analyze what you did to succeed and put those skills and habits into practice with this new challenge. Remind yourself of the many ways you’ve succeeded. You will at this, too.

Focus on Your Vision

Finally, focus on your long-term goals, also referred to by health and wellness coaches as your wellness vision or mission statement. Remember why you’re trying to do the things you do. I impressed myself this week with how clear my reasons are and how easily I can explain them. Instead of hearing the question, “What will this do for you?” and replying, “I have no clue!” I can succinctly say why I’m doing certain things. That’s a HUGE win.

What is your life purpose? What is your Big Why? Can you come up with some process goals rather than outcome goals? If that feels too daunting, pick a smaller area of your life and come up with one change you might improve. That may be as basic as drinking 64 ounces of water a day, or as complicated as getting an advanced degree by the time you turn 60.

Whether you want to help your family, get another credential, pick up a new hobby, or lead a group into the mountains, look for what gives you energy and spend more time there. If you feel no spark of energy for what you’re considering, it might not be the right thing to pursue.

Takeaway: Mine the Energy

Get comfortable with a good cup of your favorite hot beverage and then take a few deep breaths. Then, without censoring yourself, write down 20 things you are interested in learning more about. Don’t let the editor get in the way, just let your inner child play. When you get to 20, get up and leave your list alone. If you reread it now, you might find fault with each item. Put it somewhere you can look at it with fresh eyes.

One thing that gives me energy is exploring new-to-me trails. This public art is one of six installments by Thomas Dambu's called "Jakob Two Trees", part of his Northwest Trolls, Way of the Bird King. See www.nwtrolls.org for more. — One thing that gives me energy is exploring new-to-me trails. This public art is one of six installments by Thomas Dambu’s called “Jakob Two Trees”, part of his Northwest Trolls, Way of the Bird King. See www.nwtrolls.org for more.

Then 1-2 days later, pick it up again. Study it. What pops out at you as the most exciting, the item with the most energy? What step can you take today to start pursuing that high-energy item? You owe it to yourself to pursue your dreams. I’m so close to finishing the requirements to get back to hike leading, and every hike I go on makes me itch for more. I’m chasing that energy and feeling stronger every time I go back to the mountains. You can find that same energy if you trust yourself to do so.

Personal Growth: How to Balance Progress and Pain

Following our phenomenal two-week trip to Iceland, I dove headfirst into two packed weeks of growth. I wanted to capitalize on the beautiful weather and fall colors October brings to the Pacific Northwest. Growth events included a 3-day writers’ conference in Edmonds, critique group meetings, client sessions, lunches and walks with friends, and a handful of mountain adventures.

The biggest event in my month of connections was going to be a week-long visit to Asheville, NC to see my parents. Unfortunately, Hurricane Helene wreaked havoc on their home. I had to postpone my upcoming trip indefinitely. During a time of so many fun things, how can I get past the one giant disappointment? By focusing on what went right.

We enjoyed fall colors and sunshine on a Mountaineers' hike to Monte Cristo Ghost Town on the Mountain Loop Highway. — We enjoyed fall colors and sunshine on a Mountaineers’ hike to Monte Cristo Ghost Town on the Mountain Loop Highway.

Growth: Embrace Small Wins and Community Connections

This was my thirteenth year (six years as a paid attendee and seven volunteering) participating in Edmonds’ Write on the Sound (WOTS) writers’ conference. As a senior member of the planning committee, I agreed to help host the online portion of the conference. This happened to be a day after I learned about Hurricane Helene’s devastation in my parents’ hometown.

I kept myself focused on the task before me on September 28, and again the following weekend for the in-person part of the conference. My tasks included introducing speakers, guiding lost participants, and evaluating sessions, among others. I also had several opportunities to connect with my accountability partner, Elena Hartwell Taylor.

My accountability partner, Elena Hartwell Taylor (of Allegory Editing) has been instrumental in my personal growth. Here we catch up over lunch at Write on the Sound 2024.

Novel Writing Revisited

Attending the conference also renewed my interest in working on a manuscript that I shelved when I started my blog. Being a part of an intellectual community gives me a sense of creative purpose and reminds me why I write in the first place: To learn about what matters to me.

My online critique groups have also provided me with valuable insights on several pieces I shared. All eight of my writing partners seemed thrilled to learn that I wanted to give my novel another try. I am blessed to have the depth of support I do. In difficult times our community is critical to our mental and emotional well-being.

Fostering new social ties in the mountains while hiking to Monte Cristo ghost town.

Venture Outdoors with Leadership Growth Potential

My alpine adventures in October have included a solo hike of Mt. Teneriffe, a return to McClellan Butte with two friends, a small group outing to Monte Cristo, and a trail work trip on the Wagon Train Trail near Franklin Falls.

Morning rays peek through the forest and fog high on Mt. Teneriffe. I entered this photo in WTA's fall photo contest. — Morning rays peek through the forest and fog high on Mt. Teneriffe. I entered this photo in WTA’s fall photo contest.

Each represents growth beyond my comfort zone. Teneriffe was a solo 13-mile, 4100′ gain trip that I completed in six hours. I had the mountain to myself except for two people I saw half an hour from the trailhead. Two friends and I hiked McClellan Butte on a Saturday, including part of the very exposed scramble at the top. There were maybe a dozen cars in the parking lot when we finished.

Our rainy 6-person hike to Monte Cristo’s Ghost Town confirmed how much I long to lead trips again. This time, hikes rather than climbs. Not only did the participants get along great, but I loved sharing my knowledge and skills with multiple people. With luck and good weather, I should complete my mentored hike by the end of November so I can lead off-season outings with the Mountaineers.

My friend Susie followed me up part of the scramble on McClellan Butte with Mt. Rainier behind us.

Trail Maintenance: A Different Kind of Exercise

The trail maintenance trip introduced me to a group of seasoned veterans with years of experience. Even though I can hike for six hours or more, doing demanding physical labor for the same amount of time is a different story. It reminded me of my time volunteering at the Woodland Park Zoo mucking out the giraffe barn and raking leaves on the savannah, another period of growth.

The WTA crew introduced me to trench digging, trail widening and narrowing, bridge flossing, rock hauling, root removal, and wood chip shoveling. I loved the satisfying feeling of accomplishment — that “Look what I helped create!” feeling — as we surveyed our work on the return to the cars. Now I can say I’ve helped beautify trails at my favorite place along I-90: Exit 47.

Getting a primer on all the WTA tools we might have to use at Wagon Train Trail (Exit 47) off I-90.

What’s more, all four alpine experiences deepened my commitment to getting outdoors. It helps that we’ve had gorgeous weather. Have I mentioned how much I adore October in the Pacific Northwest? I have since added two hikes to complete the requirements for leadership. And with luck, I’ll participate in other trail maintenance trips this fall.

Balancing Professional and Personal Growth

An area that has proven challenging during the past month is professional development. Sometimes I struggle to apply the new neuroscience material I’m learning. I don’t handle frustration very well. And neuroscience feels as complicated to me as rocket science.

But every time I find something that makes a difference to a client, it feels as rewarding to my brain as trail work and hiking are to my body. Am I generating new neurological pathways? I’ve been told that struggle leads to mastery. If we’re not struggling, we cannot grow. I’m trying to remember to embrace the pain as a way to move forward.

Our fearsome threesome after a day hiking McClellan Butte.

As I try new challenges, sometimes my sleep quality and self-care time decrease. Not good. Particular physical therapy exercises, grounding, eating healthy foods, and practicing mindfulness keep my engine running when I do them. My challenge is making sure I keep a balance between challenge and restoration. To thrive means doing mentally challenging tasks while also ensuring I keep recuperative efforts.

Managing Anxiety

The day after the online portion of the conference (Sunday, September 29) I tried to reach my parents without success. Their power, water, landline, and cell services were all knocked out. A powerless feeling settled around my neck and shoulders. I wanted so badly to help, to comfort them in some way, perhaps by extension, comforting myself.

Evaluating the Elements of Scene master class taught by Jenny Bartoy at Write on the Sound, 2024.

I dove into physical chores: draining and scrubbing the hot tub; scouring the basement shower; raking and sweeping using tools my parents sent a few years ago. Logically, I knew none of those chores would help them. But they allowed me to think grateful thoughts and send healing wishes across the country. Now that I know they’re physically okay and their house is under the care of a general contractor, I feel a release of some anxiety.

Navigating Disappointment and Finding Perspective

On Friday, my mother texted an update to me and asked to FaceTime. At the same time, United Airlines sent a second change in my flights. This time, however, they booked me on flights I never would have chosen myself. As I tried contacting my mom, I had a sinking feeling I’d have to postpone my visit. Too many signs were telling me to delay travel.

Sure enough, my mom told me about the house damage and contract work starting during the proposed visit. They wouldn’t have running water until (at the earliest) the very end of my week-long visit. To make things worse, while we talked, my husband had to start a work call, cutting our call short.

My lovely parents enjoyed a sushi restaurant when I last visited them in February 2024. Love you guys!

Understanding the Hidden Message Behind a Craving

Emotionally drained, missing my parents, and feeling very sad, I almost succumbed to a primal urge to binge on chocolate. You crave connection, not chocolate, my inner voice whispered. Aha, connection – to myself, with others. Chocolate wouldn’t help. Another growth opportunity!

Instead, I took Ajax for a long walk and tearfully focused on taking deep breaths. I enjoyed a lovely lunch with a dear friend. My husband and I played ping pong and enjoyed a movie night. And I started counting my blessings.

Delicious trail food - homemade pad Thai - works way better for my body and mind than trail mix and chocolate right now. — Delicious trail food – homemade pad Thai – works way better for my body and mind than trail mix and chocolate right now.

One silver lining was learning about the airline’s cancellation policy (security is my Achilles’ heel). Because United had already made two changes to the ticket, I was eligible for a full refund. Knowing I wouldn’t be out that investment helped. I took my journal to the backyard to ground, letting Mother Earth do her job to center me, and gradually, I felt better. Working on this blog post and focusing on gratitude got me to the point this weekend where I almost felt giddy about the many good things in my life. Growth in action.

Choosing Gratitude in the Face of Change

While I may not get to connect in person with my parents as planned, rather than dwelling on that setback, I can focus on everything going well. Over the past two weeks, I met some potential new hiking partners, including one who might be someone I could co-lead with. I found a new way to give back to the mountains and my hiking community by helping maintain and rebuild trails.

The middle-grade novel I set aside three years ago has drawn me back with renewed interest and excitement. My husband and I are studying a neuroscience curriculum that is challenging me mentally and physically and has the potential to provide enormous benefits to my clients.

Beautiful fall colors below the stunning peaks surrounding the ghost town of Monte Cristo.

Takeaways

Can I spin the big negative into a positive? My folks will likely have running water in another month, so I could look for dates in early 2025 for a visit. By then, they’ll have the roof repaired and guest bedrooms fixed. Not only will they be able to enjoy visitors, but the restaurants and community of Asheville will have more time to re-establish equilibrium after pervasive flood damage.

We can’t change natural disasters. But we can change our reactions to them. My parents are fortunate: they live outside of the flood zone. They have each other and their physical health. Their community is banding together in creative, unique ways. And while they have a hole in their roof, their house still stands, intact, with phone, cell, and electrical services restored.

Ajax poses in front of a beautiful tree in the Arboretum this morning on a walk-and-talk with a friend.

My parents have endured a lot. They’re resilient. And patient. I’ll have to be, too. So, I will turn my focus toward strengthening local connections within the Mountaineers, WTA, colleagues, clients, and my writing community. I know that I’ll visit Asheville again when the timing is better. We cannot choose the timeline, but we can choose our attitudes about it.

If you have examples of shifting your attention away from negatives and toward gratitude, share them in the comments so we can all learn. I love hearing from readers!

Iceland Week 2: How to Enjoy the Country of Fire and Ice

Last Friday, I shared highlights from the first week of our two-week Iceland vacation. Building on our family’s tutorial on how to get the most from your Iceland visit, today I share our westward trip from windy Lake Myvatn from week two.

The view north along the East Iceland coastline and fjords.

Explore Iceland: Godafoss, Petting Zoo, and Akureyri

Day 8 was unique in that I recalled three smaller events rather than one big highlight. They included visits to a waterfall, a petting zoo, and the “capital of north Iceland,” Akureyri.

Godafoss

Our first stop out of Myvatn was at a waterfall named Godafoss, which looked like two rivers running at right angles into each other. But from above, we could see that one river wrapped around a resistant basalt “island” in the middle. The winds had died down significantly from the previous day, and we enjoyed partly cloudy skies and clear views of the panoramic falls.

Daladyrd Petting Zoo

When I told my husband our next stop was a petting zoo, he seemed skeptical. A zoo, in Iceland? Volunteering for eight years at the Woodland Park Zoo has made me a big fan of exploring international zoos of all kinds and sizes. When I read off the list of animals we’d be visiting, Brooke and I put it to a vote, and we won.

We arrived just before they opened at 11 a.m., but the owners let us in early. After meeting their adult dogs and two cats, I headed out to see their Arctic fox. We hadn’t had any luck seeing one anywhere else. The female was vocalizing and her fur was transitioning from summer dark to winter white. My daughter spent at least half of her time visiting with three kittens who climbed all over her.

The owners’ seven baby puppies made their public debut, and we laughed at chickens chasing rabbits away from their days-old chicks. We also visited their Icelandic horses (including two precious black foals), cows, goats, guinea pigs, turkeys, and sleeping pigs. Okay, so it was more of a family farm than a zoo. It was still fun. My daughter took her turn on their outdoor trampoline, getting a boost of endorphins for the next phase of the trip. We agreed unanimously that it was worth a stop on a long day of driving.

Akureyri

The “capital of north Iceland” and the second largest settlement outside of the capital region is Akureyri, with 20,000 inhabitants. We spent a few hours visiting a yarn shop and neighboring bookstore, replenishing our food supplies (at Bonus!), having a picnic at the waterfront, and looking for birds and flowers at the local Botanical Gardens. Fall colors had already appeared by September 6. After that, we headed for our next stay in the tiny village of Laugarbakki.

Iceland Airbnb Lodging

By this point, five things stood out about Icelandic Airbnb lodging:

Most of the places we chose were pretty tight quarters compared to New Zealand and US lodging
Most places had shoe racks right inside the door to prevent tracking in dirt requiring additional cleaning
Icelandic locks on bathrooms and outer doors took patience and persistence to figure out
“Fully equipped kitchen” means something different to everyone
Every place had its unique charm and, even though tight, we had everything we needed, including WiFi

When we reached the Guesthouse Langafit I made us dinner for the first time in a week: golden potatoes, bacon, and ground pork. Not the set-up I’m used to but still tasty and relatively affordable. We also had a few delightful conversations (supper and breakfast) with a lovely couple from Austria who were traveling the Ring Road in the opposite direction. We swapped stories and photos before heading our separate ways.

"Fully equipped kitchen" where I made dinner the night before our anniversary. — “Fully equipped kitchen” where I made dinner the night before our anniversary.

A very tight fit, with three single beds and our luggage in the aisle.

Explore Iceland: Westfjords In a Day

To kick off our 28th wedding anniversary on day 9, I cooked bacon and eggs so my husband and daughter could sleep in. Back home, we’d debated about how much time we could allot for the Westfjords. We ended up downgrading from three days to one once we decided to drive the whole Ring Road. We still spent more than four hours driving on day 9, the second longest driving day of the entire trip.

In Holmavik we spent 45 minutes in the tiny Museum of Icelandic Witchcraft and Sorcery, my daughter’s choice for the region. I’d watched a short video about necropants, tilberi, and the zombie climbing out of the floor, so I knew what to expect. Fortunately, we were provided a guide in English so we could read about the exhibits.

Natural Hot Spring

The other highlight was my only hot springs experience in Iceland, at the Reykholar Hostel. We’d chosen not to visit the Blue Lagoon resort outside of Reykjavik as too touristy. However, when we checked in early at the hostel, we learned that only one of the nine rooms besides ours would be occupied that evening. And not only was there a sauna, but a hot tub as well!

After dropping off our bags to make room in the car, we explored a very winding road west from Reykholar, but after an hour of driving west, we all agreed that we’d had enough fjord driving and decided not to continue to the pink sand beach of Latrabjarg. Instead, we returned to the hostel where my husband tried out the sauna and I enjoyed a solo dip in the natural springs hot tub.

Hot tub shell over a natural hot spring. I had it all to myself despite the hostel having nine rooms.

This spa had an incredible view and no top to move, buttons to push, or knobs to turn. I soon discovered that the shell of a hot tub sat perched directly over a geothermal hot spring. The markings I saw on the surface were merely mineral deposits. I had my Icelandic hot springs experience!

Explore Iceland On Horseback

On Day 10 I woke intending to explore Reykholar on foot, but the wind and rain returned. We’d planned to go horseback riding at midday. Riding in the wind and rain for several hours didn’t appeal very much.

Fortunately, by the time we reached Dalahestar around 12:30, we decided to take a chance and booked a private 2-hour ride. Isabella, a guide from Poland, was the only ranch hand there, and after she finished her 11 a.m. ride, she asked about our experience as riders. When she learned we’d ridden quite a bit, she asked if we would like to do some galloping. Heck yes!

I had a lovely ride on a beautiful horse named Rekkur. His thick winter coat was already coming in, so soft! — I had a lovely ride on a beautiful brown horse named Rekkur. His thick winter coat was already coming in, so soft!

Embracing the Elements

When the wind picked up and the rain returned, Isabella loaned us durable weatherproof clothes. We helped her prepare the horses, and as we started away from the barn, we discussed reducing the ride to an hour if the rain continued.

Like magic, it stopped. Isabella let us gallop in three places, and she took us down to the black sand beach as the tide receded. The promise of a beach ride was why we chose Dalahestar in the first place. Isabella did not disappoint!

My daughter with her Iceland horse, Thytur. — My daughter enjoys a peaceful moment with her Iceland horse, Thytur.

The three of us with (left to right) Keyill, Thytur, and Rekkur on the black sand beach.

Gait Education

How those sturdy Icelandic horses navigate the gloppy mud without slipping is amazing. We learned that they have a few different gaits from most horses we’ve ridden before. Instead of trotting, these horses do what’s called a “tolt” where the front and back legs move together on each side, making for a lilting ride rather than a jolting bounce. And their gallop felt liberating and freeing — in short, amazing. Add to that hot cocoa and cookies to warm up afterward and it was a definite highlight!

Snaefellsnes Peninsula

On our way to tour the sites around the western part of the Snaefellsnes Peninsula, we stayed two nights in a lovely 2-bedroom Airbnb apartment known as the Writer’s Nest near a great pizza place, Kaffi 59. Located near Kirkjufell, or “Church Mountain”, it was by far our most spacious lodging while in Iceland.

Back home, I’d been given the Peninsula as one of the destinations to plan. Our daughter chose to stay in the apartment while my husband and I visited a few falls, birding spots, and tourist stops including taking the Saxholl Crater, Ytri Tunga to try to spot seals, and some stunning seaside scenery known as Longdrangar Basalt Cliffs, otherwise known as the “Rocky castle.” Londrangar gets my vote for the highlight of day 11.

Stunning scenery of the Longdrangar Basalt Cliffs, my highlight of day 11. — The stunning scenery of the Longdrangar Basalt Cliffs is a highlight of day 11.

Driving Takes a Toll

The day didn’t reach my expectations, the only day that didn’t. As we drove, I reflected on other international trips and how my mind would return home several days before the end. We still had a few things remaining on our list, but for the most part, Iceland had been a dream vacation.

Yet driving over 1200 miles in two weeks, staying in close quarters 24/7, and moving to a new place almost every night takes a toll. I felt grateful to have two nights at each of our last two Airbnb places.

So much of Iceland is mountainous volcanic terrain with spots of color, like this little building by itself.

Once we returned to the apartment, I stole an hour to clear my head and stretch my legs. It didn’t matter that our daughter chose to claim time for herself on a day I’d planned for all of us to enjoy. As an introvert, sometimes I need to carve out “me time.” She does, too, as a young adult. Driving trips can be a challenge. The one thing I might have changed would be to schedule half of a day for doing nothing. Personal choice.

Kirkjufells and Kirkufellsfoss

A long, restorative night’s sleep left me eager to explore before we left the Writer’s Nest. Despite strong winds and biting cold, I headed on foot for the twenty-minute walk to explore Iceland’s Kirkufellsfoss. I was not disappointed.

Not only did I see a moody sky over Kirkufells, but only two other photographers were out at 6 a.m. That meant getting a quality photo of the peak and falls, without a crowd of tourists in front of them. My 90-minute walk was the highlight of Day 12.

Moody dawn sky behind Kirkufell Mtn. and the falls.

Landscape shot of the falls and the peak. Which appeals to you more?

Reykjavik

Following that walk, we packed and headed toward Reykjavik for our final two nights. We made a few stops in search of golden plovers, taking our unique bird species for the trip to 53 with 30 new life birds for me.

Driving into the largest metropolitan area in Iceland felt a little like culture shock after being on the Ring Road for 12 days. We laughed at the sign indicating that tractors were not allowed on the highway between 7-9 a.m. and 3-6 p.m.

This sign says "No tractors allowed on the freeway between 7-9 a.m. and 3-6 p.m." — This sign says “No tractors allowed on the freeway between 7-9 a.m. and 3-6 p.m.”

Whale Watching

At long last, we finally had some calm, sunny, and beautiful weather on day 13. Just about perfect conditions for a three-hour whale-watching trip that featured two Minke whales, followed by time in Reykjavik. We found a lovely lighthouse where soft late afternoon sunlight illuminated an entire beach of golden plovers, waiting to be photographed.

One of two minke whales we saw on our 3-hour cruise.

Golden plovers basking in the sun on the beach.

But wait, there’s more. To top it off, we were graced by two nights of relatively clear weather, both of which allowed views of the northern lights. But on our final night in Iceland, the lights show rivaled the one we saw two years ago in Alaska. Unfortunately, I did not have the right setup to capture more than some crude streaks (they didn’t even get imported into Lightroom…)

The spectacular sunset on our last night left us grateful for two weeks to explore Iceland.

Still speaking after 1200 miles! That's a solid father-daughter relationship. — Still speaking after 1200 miles! That’s a solid father-daughter relationship.

Mt. Esja and Iceland Takeaways

Our final day to explore Iceland included visiting a thrift shop in Reykjavik, seeing several lighthouses south of Keflavik, and getting ice cream. Our direct flight trips to and from Iceland (about 7 hours each) went seamlessly. I’ve shared my highlight from our last day, a wonderful solo experience on Mt. Esja.

The biggest takeaways from two weeks in Iceland — there were so many — are these:

Iceland has something for everyone. Whether you like traditional tourist spots or unique experiences, identify what is most important to you and how you’d like to visit
Weather matters. If you allow more time and flexibility, you can move events around if you get bad weather. In the shoulder seasons (spring/fall) expect colder temperatures and wind, fewer tourists, and lower prices.
If you only have four days to explore Iceland, consider staying around Reykjavik or Akureyri. We are so grateful for the time and means to visit for two weeks.
While Icelandic food may not be well-known in other countries (like burgers from America or pizza from Italy) their Skyr, pizzas, fish and chips, and seafood are plenty accessible and tasty.
And finally, as is true anywhere you go, when traveling internationally don’t forget a SIM card! My daughter and I relied on Wi-Fi in the evenings, but my husband had a SIM so we could navigate and change plans on the fly.

Cooking in the bus at the foot of Mt. Esja. This was our most unique Airbnb stay while in Iceland.

Have you been to Iceland? What was your favorite part? Share in the comments. And if you like this post, please check out week one and Mt. Esja.